e2 #245

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Deputy: Mariah Hedges deputylifestyle@ epigram.org.uk

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presents

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What’s On

Lifestyle

Editor: Imogen Palmer lifestyle@ epigram.org.uk

5 student house style Is your student house a hole?

Do the walls look like they’ve been painted with vomit?

Would the carpet have been described as ‘groovy’ in the seventies? ‘Yes!’, I hear you cry, ‘how can we ever call this squalid pit our ‘home’!?’

Well fear not. This is your step-by-step guide to making this hovel reflective of your cultured good taste. When we’re finished, you will be capable of forcing a nauseating level of personality into any neutral space.

Walls

1) Show your appreciation of the

human form. From Michaelangelo to Picasso, great artistic minds have always been eager to celebrate the beauty of the human body. Joining them in this is a great way of demonstrating your delicate, artistic temperament. Whether you do so with a two metre high photograph of the exceptionally well proportioned and scantily clad Svetlana from Sweden, or with your own artistic representation of a naked Ron Weasley, is up to you.

2)

Did you take a gap yah? If so, the world needs to know about it.

If you did NOT, never fear, there are a few little ‘cheats’ you can use to create the illusion of post selfdiscovery worldliness without ever experiencing enlightening rituals such as the traditional Thai ‘full moon party’. When it comes to your home, the trick is to bedeck the bejesus out of your walls, ceiling and windows with pseudo-ethnic drapes/scarves/ pantaloons. To put it simply: if it’s fabric and it can pass for foreign, it should be hanging in your house. The

key here is to pick brightly coloured, clashing patterns and hang them at angles. Remember, the look you are going for is ‘sheik’s love-den’, not ‘padded cell’.

3) Steal something. A stolen sign is a

nice nouveau-grime-chic flourish which will add that badass vibe to your room.

Forget taking drugs till your irises disappear, shaving ‘wild thing’ into the back of your head, or sacrificing small mammals: there is nothing more hardcore than a stolen ‘men at work’ sign.

Welcome back to Bristol

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If you’re anything like us, chances are you’re probably starting to feel at home in Bristol.

Lifestyle : Imogen Palmer and Mariah Hedges

This can lead to embarrassing conversations with family members as you explain that when you say you’re ‘going home’ you really mean that you’re going back to Bristol.

Never mind, they’ll get over it.

who will meet Thursday 2nd February at 1.30pm in The White Bear

What’s On : Olivia Stephany Fashion : Francesca Clayton and Lizzy Bullock

who will meet Tuesday 24th January at 1.10pm in The White Bear

Travel : Verity Stockdale

who will meet Friday 27th January at 2pm in The White Bear

To celebrate our return to the place we call Home, Sweet, Home we’ve got features on all things domestic. We’ve even gone to the effort of putting together a cosy knitted cover, with the help of photoshop, to make you feel right at home.

Money : Alex Denne

with e2 editor : Matthew McCrory illustrator : Sophie Sladen

cover knitted by : Iona Vincent

23. 01. 2012

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4)Use the free shit. Next time you

are accosted in the street by someone desperately trying to force a scrap of cardboard into your hand, think twice before banging out your tae-kwon-do moves to get rid of them. Flyers for club nights are useful for filling in any blank wall space, plus many of them feature fun phrases like ‘OMFG WTF DID I DO LAST NIGHT?!’.

Furniture

5) The ideal student furniture should

be broken, depressed and sagging, like your alcoholic great uncle at the end of an episode of Hollyoaks. In fact, landlords often supply furniture which fits the bill.

However, there is always more you can do to make the most of it. For example, why not try taking a baseball bat to your desk, or invite all your housemates to bounce on your bed? Perhaps the single most important item of furniture, though, is the sofa. Never underestimate the power of a wisely chosen settee. My hot tip for acquiring a sofa of impeccable elegance is to take a look in a skip. Not only is this extremely affordable, but they often come with a lovely musty smell which will lend your living room a fabulously authentic squat-chic vibe.

The Carpet

6) Attention to detail really brings a

room together. Never underestimate, for example, the importance of a snappily decorated floor. A suspicious stain or burn can bring a drab carpet to life, and it’s cheap and fun to do. You can use a variety of materials to leave your mark. One nice idea is to use substances which resemble bodily fluids, as these make for interesting talking points. If you’re feeling particularly creative, multiple stains can be used to play a fun variation on the cloud game: ‘this one looks like a kangaroo giving birth to a storm trooper’ etc.

6 Ornaments

7) Wasted is the new

chic. Nothing says French-bohemian-neoromanticism quite like a collection of empty Sainsbury’s basics vodka bottles (other brands of gut burning beverage are available). A few (or several) empty cans and bottles scattered around your house creates a certain ‘je ne sais quoi.’ For maximum impact, group bottles together in the shape of a pyramid, or a historically accurate fortress. This is a sure fire way of provoking not only gasps of awe, but also comments such as ‘gosh, you folks have clearly been having a jolly wild time’.

To which you can casually reply: ‘Yes. Yes we have.’

A Centrepiece

8) The traffic cone. A student must-have.

When Hubert McNab invented the traffic cone in 1906, it sparked a phenomenon

which baffles scientists to this day. It quickly became apparent that while intoxicated, students in the presence of these seemingly innocent objects are seized by a feverish emotional attachment to them. Witnessing a drunken student carrying home a traffic cone is an experience akin to watching a mother gorilla tenderly/desperately carrying her gorilla-letts away from a pack of gun bearing hunters. Thus the traffic cone has become an emblem of studenthood: uniting student houses across the country, a proud symbol of the drunken foolhardiness that defines us as a people. Also, if you turn them upside down they can make a handy and stylish umbrella/walking stick holder.

Text : Annie Bell Images: Francis Kwong

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What’s On

Lifestyle

Editor: Imogen Palmer lifestyle@ epigram.org.uk

Deputy: Mariah Hedges deputylifestyle@ epigram.org.uk

Location, Location, Location It’s that time of year when everyone frantically tries to make decisions about where, how and why to live, so e2 decided to offer some wise words of advice to all you aspiring house-hunters out there. If you’ve already crossed this bridge, congratulations! But to those of you avoiding making important decisions like the plague, listen up, because some of this might help.

Rule 1. Don’t Panic!

Yes, maybe it’s a little obvious, but it’s true. You might be hearing that so-and-so has got a house already sorted and has already paid their bills and having the time of their life being organised, but this doesn’t mean that Bristol is going to run out of student houses overnight. Try to avoid taking the first house you see, even if it is the one you’ve dreamt about since finding out you’d have your own one day; it’s always good to make sure it’s the one you want, and you can’t know that until you’ve seen one you’d never want.

Rule 2. Location, Location, Location Unless you’re a fan of mud, rain and long walks, you don’t want to live in Stoke Bishop again. If you’re in university all the time, then you’ll want to live close, and if you’re the ‘stay at home’ type, then you don’t have to be on your department’s doorstep. Houses nearest university tend to go the fastest, but take into account other commitments (stuff at the union, a part-time job, wife and kids.

I don’t know; I’m just guessing). Student housing tends to focus on areas like Clifton and Cotham which are roughly situated on either side of Whiteladies Road. Clifton is the classier and more expensive, but I’d require more than minimum research to know for sure. Then there are areas like Redland, slightly further away from university but in a quieter bit of Bristol, or Kingsdown, which is pretty much the opposite and close enough to spit at the university’s buildings. Not that I’m suggesting you do that. Finally, there’s the City Centre, which is where a lot of the Unite flats are.

It’s close to pretty much everything that’s happening in Bristol, but potentially the loudest and most expensive.

Fashion

Rule 3. Your Housemates If you’re one of those people who can count the friends you could live with on more than one hand, then I am consumed by envy. But bear in mind that the people you choose to live with aren’t just for Christmas, they’re probably for a whole year. There are always more houses for smaller numbers but if you do find you can’t bear to live without any of your nine closest new-best-friends, fear not!

There are student houses of all sizes but the bigger ones tend to go sooner. I’d aim for a mix of genders and degrees, if only for variety’s sake.

Rule 4. Is the Price Right?

Make sure the price is fair for everybody involved, especially if you’re in a big group. If one housemate, let’s call him Will, or Wills, can afford the dream mansion with stables and a swimming pool, but another... er... Harriet Baker would stand no chance, then maybe you should look for somewhere fairer for everybody.

Money

Travel

Rule 5. Do the Research This might sound paranoid, but that’s just what the aliens controlling the government want you to think. But that’s a topic for another article... this paranoia concentrates on estate agents. Check everything you’re told, about the house, the bills, everything! Whether it’s online or maybe with the current tenants of the house: not because you’ll be lied to, but because maybe something will slip the mind of the person selling the house to you, something vital like it being built on a Native American burial ground. It never hurts to check.

Well, those are my five rules, and I hope they’ll be useful in the hectic weeks to come. Good luck and happy hunting!

Text: Stephen Hartill

Image: Alex Norris

Pandora, if that is your real name, I’ve been doing some research and I have reason to believe that you are not who you claim you are. From the little information you’ve given us, which is suspicious in itself, you have left little trace of who you are. I know you call yourself Pandora, surname unknown, and claim to have graduated in Philosophy and German. Only one person graduated with this degree last year and her name is not Pandora anything.

I’m actually beginning to question your very existence. At the very least you should not be offering advice and people should not be asking for your help. It is wholly irresponsible for you to be offering help because it is clear you are at the very best unstable and at the worst deceptive and dangerous.

s ’ a r o d n a P Box

Is this is some sort of Illuminati conspiracy? All the symbols are there. You aren’t fooling us with the flower in your hair, it’s obviously a symbol for the All Seeing Eye. And your necklace is made up of three triangles. You must think we’re stupid and don’t see this sort of thing.

We’re on to you Pandora (a symbolic name perhaps?)

Firstly, this isn’t a question. Usually I don’t deem rambling statements worthy of my time but for this I will make an exception.

There is definitely a lot here that needs to be cleared up. However, despite your inane, or should that be insane, ramblings, I am not about to divulge all my personal information. Celebrities deserve their privacy just like everyone else.

Much to your disbelief, my name is, in fact, Pandora. No symbolism, no hidden meanings; just a beautiful name befitting my beautiful spirit. My family name is, sorry, my family names are SmytheKlein. Is that enough information for you? Well is it?

I’m so pleased that you took the time to embarrass yourself to both stalk me and then submit evidence of stalking to me. In handwriting. How you got my postal address is beyond me but surely that in itself is fact of my existence?

My academic credentials are little of your concern. I graduated from Bristol and I have the degree to prove it. I bet you’ll be asking to see my birth certificate next.

23. 01. 2012

There’s no place like Bristol OR the awkward moment when your step-mum sells your house When I arrived back into Temple Meads after Christmas, it had never felt more like coming home. Which is lucky, really, as my latest (brief) sojourn to the family residence was marred by my step-mother’s plans to up sticks and move to rural Ireland come Easter. A golden, Guinness-filled holiday opportunity, I know, but as the house is going at the same time as she is, I was left packing up twenty years’ worth of shit and string into cardboard boxes and plastic bags, ready to be transported West before April. It felt like the Kirstie Allsopp and Jacqueline Wilson collaboration that never was.

Before you start hunting for your Kleenex and miniature violin, I’ll clear something up – namely, that since starting university I’ve spent all of 42½ days at home…given that term-time only takes up 30 weeks of the year, you could argue that that’s not a great deal. An argument that was vehemently thrown at me by step-mama, as she demanded to know whether I saw the family house as my home or as a free hotel situated conveniently close to my school-friends. I blustered, I bluffed, I stalled, I blushed. But in the end, if home is where the heart is then my heart was waving to me from a pub in the heart of Hotwells, wrapped in a Rovers scarf and clutching a pint of cider. Bristol had won.

Things leant more and more in its favour during the summer I spent here; contrary to popular student belief, some of Bristol’s best bits come out to play once term has finished. Admittedly my experience of the Harbourside Festival, summer riots and International Balloon Fiesta was largely based around serving organic beer and Italian olives to the thirsty middle-classes, but nevertheless I started to feel like I belonged to the city and it to me. Furthermore, in a discovery-of-penicillin kind of way, it dawned on me that the city of Bristol stretches further than the confines of Clifton and Redland – I spent time in places that had never heard of student discount, met people who actually lived south of the river and came away with a drunken Bristolian twang I can call my own.

Sure, there are downsides to pledging my allegiance entirely to Bristol – next month I’ll move all my worldly possessions into my student house, and creating storage space for my old school reports and class photos feels like preparing to indoctrinate an unsullied version of myself into

Society Slut is open-minded, if you know what I mean.

Very open-minded. I’m a doer. I go for it.

The Society Slut has often, reluctantly, heard the phrase ‘home is where the heart is’. I suppose it must mean more to those who have a heart and whose ‘home’ isn’t the laundry room of their student union. Some people take such pride in where they come from they feel the need to shout about it, unite, and re-connect with their heritage in the form of organised fun.

Northern Soc is a prime example of this: in a university where half the student population seem to be from London (how do they all fit there?) hardy northern lads and lasses arrived to find themselves a minority.

‘Where are the proper pubs? Why does everyone sound like a toff? And where, for feck’s sake, can I get a decent pie?’ they cry, alienated and alone.

They need not fear, for Northern Soc is here, who apparently can grant them the answers they seek.

‘If home is where the heart is then my heart was waving to me from a pub in the heart of Hotwells’ adult life. Inevitably I’ll spend less time with friends from college, and the safety net of dropping out of university and hibernating in my old bedroom for eternity has all but been removed, but as too many people are wont to say: ‘That’s life.’

As for the upsides, they culminated during Freshers’ Week. As the autumnal influx of students began, I shook my head like a local in disapproval at the state of the Triangle and bemoaned the fact that getting a sandwich in Sainsbury’s between 12 and 2 was once again an impossibility. And then I bought up a stock of Basics gin, dressed up as a smurf and was sick outside Lounge. The town vs gown debate may still be quietly simmering, but who says you can’t have the best of both worlds?

Joesephine Franks

Dear Pandora, I wanted to write to tell you how amazing I think you are. I really look forward to reading your column every issue. I especially loved your special column just before Christmas. They should definitely let you write some more in depth features. I bet loads of people loved it!

I followed your advice exactly and everything went just as I wanted. I got the exact reaction I was after. You know the one, the look of fear, panic and disgust all wrapped into one. Thanks Pandora! The best bit is that I don’t have to go to any more of those boring as fuck family gatherings I’m usually expected to attend. I mean, technically, I’m not legally allowed to go but that makes it even more edgy and alternative, right? Ok, so maybe I’ve let my mother down (dad’s words not mine) but she’ll get over it, right?

Society Slut

Thank you for your for kind words. Even though I don’t care what people think about me it’s nice to know that I have the support of my fans. Sometimes it’s a burden to be well adjusted and balanced. I find it impossible to simply sit back and watch people make mistakes or, even worse, the decisions that society wants them to make.

There’s a reason I was asked to take this job, let’s not forget that this is a job, and I take it very seriously. There are many people (see overleaf for an example) who want to bring Pandora down. They don’t like what she has to say. They can’t deal with her harsh but fair words of advice. Well Pandora has three words for you all: GET OVER IT. You can say whatever you want; there’s no point.

You might think being rude about me makes you look better, but I have news you for you, it doesn’t.

Trying to ‘bring me down’ won’t help lift you up.

Just something I thought all you ‘haters’ should know. You’re welcome.

Misconception one: they would be smelly, pie-eating… *interactive fun!

Insert your own offensive northern stereotype here!* and start a fight. Don’t get me wrong: Northern Soc love the northern stereotype. The event itself was a ‘Pie lock-in’ at Bristol’s own ‘Pieminister’ and heck, there was a lot of pie. Every pie you could imagine from ‘Wild mushroom and asparagus’ to the more traditional ‘Mr Porky’. I had pies in my eyes and ‘All I Ever Wanted’ playing in my heart. But that doesn’t mean they were hairy barbarians (or whatever you came up with you horrible, horrible person).

After I’d recovered from the initial excitement of the astonishingly wild pie variety (or pie-riety if you insist), I set about having a good craic and making some new Northern Soc pals. Who turned out to be very nice. The closest they got to a fight was a rather tense moment eyeballing a group of Morris dancers rehearsing in a building opposite. As we stood and stared, I sensed this was not an aggressive act, but an expression of envy.

Misconception two: it would be an exclusively ‘northern’ and cliquey environment. Not at all: the social was graced by the presence of a number of ‘Southern fairies’ who frittered comfortably hither and thither. While I did get the impression they were all mates already, they did not shun or abuse new attendees.

Misconception three: I would be able to stay for a few drinks then leave. If there is one thing I will take with me, always, from Northern Soc is that they know how to drink. And getting you to drink is their top priority. A drinking game was established using a dice that came in someone’s cracker. At first the rules involved picking a number and then drinking when your number is rolled (how imaginative) but later the rules of ring of fire were applied and the whole group joined in.

After promising myself that I would stay relatively sober I’m afraid to say the Society Slut stumbled home in the rain clutching an (accidentally) stolen glass and sporting a sodden cracker hat. Nowt wrong with that.

Invite the slut to your society societyslut@epigram.org.uk

North ern

Soc

Good c raic: 12 /10 Sobrie ty: ?/1 0 Cultur e: 7/10

Home sweet home It wasn’t just the festivities that I was looking forward to when returning home this Christmas.

I certainly wasn’t looking forward to the prospect of everlasting arrangements with extended family members, or the repeated requests from my mum to finally throw out my old school books and clothes. It was the simple pleasure of being at home that I was really excited for. Come the end of term, students are shattered. Too much work and far too much play calls for a recuperation period. For parents to feed us up and recharge our batteries just in time for the Spring Term.

In my greedy view, the supply of food and drink is a huge perk of being at home; substantially higher quality than the noodles, baked beans and frozen peas consumed daily when in Bristol. Opening the fridge to a sea of M&S goodies, Taste the Difference nibbles and homemade meals is no comparison to the mouldy and smelly interior of a student’s fridge.

The perfect complement to this food is a glass of wine. After all, if my parents are offering, it would be rude to say no. It is rare to get the chance to enjoy wine with dinner, as opposed to downing the first glass in preparation for drinking games.

Being back at home for the holidays is also a break from trying to save the last pennies of that term’s student loan, and it is pleasant to not be so sparing. The holidays are a month when you don’t have to think about approaching the controversial and dreaded issue of turning on the house heating. I have had times when I could see my own breath, or when I resorted to using my hairdryer in my room

for temporary warmth. Whereas at home even the dishwater can be used without an house argument, and for the first time in months I can iron my clothes - providing several outfit options for a night out. Who knew that using household appliances could be so rewarding?

The last, and most corny, perk of being at home is spending time with the family. It’s fun to join in Christmas traditions which have existed since I was 5 years old. I spend time playing Christmas piano tunes that are meant for five year olds and squabbling with my sisters as to whose homemade angel will take pride of place on the Christmas tree. My Dad’s cheesy jokes are a little funny when I haven’t heard them for months, and I find myself offering to help my mum set the table. The appeal of being at home isn’t even squandered by my sister stealing my clothes, since I know that she undoubtedly has something newer and better which I can steal in return.

All these little perks are exactly that for the very reason that they are rare. As sweet as home feels, the holidays are just long enough to appreciate the benefits without them becoming tiresome. Half of the excitement of a student house is its inadequacy, where it is acceptable to do no cleaning, wear yourself out and drink sufficient amounts of double strength squash and vodka until the Easter holidays arrives. Perhaps it is the distant thought of returning home to a power shower which keeps us going.

Rose Thomas

Travel

New year New yawn As we welcome in 2012 and return to our home-away-from-home we are all beginning to scorn that ridiculous New Year’s resolution we made. Give up chocolate for a year?! That was never going to last beyond the first birthday of term. Therefore, it’s time to revamp those outdated clichés we force ourselves to adhere so that we actually have a chance of sticking to them. Every year we trick ourselves into thinking that this year will be different: that it is finally time to use that gym membership, to be less shy, to actually go to the library.

The problem is that these resolutions are all so vague, and using terms like ‘more’ makes them completely relative to what you feel like doing. Which, more often than not (unless you’re Jodie Marsh), is eating, watching the latest reality TV show or meeting up with friends rather than an intense session of ‘absolution’.

So here is a different approach to making New Year Resolutions: shake them up and make them weird. The weirder your resolution, the more noticeable it is when you break it. Resolutions can help you to incorporate one of your ambitions, so long as you keep them interesting. The strangest that have ever been published are found in Benrik’s ‘This Diary Will Change Your Life’. Contenders for wackiest Resolution include:

Money

Resolve the Middle East crisis on a postcard

Promote a friend that you think everyone should know about

Follow the opposite sex’s magazines’ instructions (eg.

‘Get a six-pack for summer”’ for women, and ‘Love your legs!’ for men) Stop passive smoking Get a job dealing drugs

Recycle other people’s rubbish

Swear in every sentence you write or utter, and monitor people’s reaction

Make £1,879,422 exactly and no more

Train my pet to meditate with me

Watch less bad news on TV

Deputy: Mariah Hedges deputylifestyle@ epigram.org.uk

The Revolution will not be televised

Flicker:Velodenz

Fashion

What’s On

Lifestyle

Editor: Imogen Palmer lifestyle@ epigram.org.uk

Lara Kottsieper

feminist rant #2

Ladies of the world, and greater Bristol area: never underestimate the power of the gob-shite.

It was something that I had the opportunity to learn at the tender age of sixteen, upon calling a certain deserving party a c*nt. For anyone who’s previously read my opinions on swearing – I know, censorious asterisks go against everything I stand for.

But I’m also aware that this word, for some reason, is a particularly inflammatory one. I could take this as an anti-feminist slur, vilifying female genitalia as the most offensive word in the English language, but instead I’m choosing to take it as an example of GIRL POWER. Hello boys, are you packing the most powerful, dangerous word in the English language in your CKs? No, didn’t think so. Feel the power of the lady-parts.

Anyhoozle, back to my point- cue nostalgic crossfade. As a 5 ft 3, 120 lb girl who had been known to be defeated by things like ‘knowing my right and left’ and ‘locks’, I didn’t think I could command anything, let alone fear, so I was somewhat taken aback by the confession of this particular friend - 6 ft 2, buzz-cut, ASBO wielding - that he was scared of me. Interesting, I thought to myself. Very interesting.

Fast forward three years and a onetime squeeze admitted that, on first getting to know me, he had been initially...well...a bit scared of me. And this was someone I’d been actively trying to be nice to. There was something going on here.

‘the dick-swinging environment of male banter’ In the dick-swinging environment of male banter, there seems to be a bit of an expectation that men bond over banter and women are...bantees. I can’t imagine that these teenage boys had, in the past, only come across bubble-headed girls without a thing to say for themselves, but I do think that, after centuries of keeping quiet and laughing winningly when their men make a funny, some women are still reticent to step up to the plate.

We’re not yet always at home playing equal to these ‘hilarious’ men and their banter, because it’s not seen as an attractive quality in women as it is in men. A funny, but not necessarily physically blessed, man can be an Alpha, because as we all know, a woman can be laughed into bed. But for a girl to be sarcastic, outspoken or sweary, is apparently, for a lot of younger guys in particular, a bit intimidating.

This seems to have created a sort of underground sisterhood whereby girls up and down the country will be crude, sometimes unspeakably filthy in each other’s company - they swear, sex-talk and discuss bodily functions - whilst keeping conversation around their men-folk more, shall we say, hygienic. And when we do that, we’re letting the side down. To quote Caitlin Moran, we need to stand up and say ‘Damn you, the patriarchy’. We need to be more badass.

And we need men who like women, who shout and swear and eat and shit, not just squeaky-clean sex dolls; men who are comfortable around the word feminism and, preferably, who wear granddad knits and appreciate the musical stylings of Beirut.

(If this sounds like you, well done. Please send a photo, contact details, and your best cheese joke in to the Epigram office on a postcard.)

Rachael Schraer

23. 01. 2011

RESOLVED TO SPEND LESS THIS YEAR? BEGET HEARD & INFLUENCE CHANGE EVEN BETTER DISCOUNTS ALL OVER IN TOWN,THE AT UBU & MOST ONLINE WITH INTERACTIVE NUS EXTRA

ORDER DEMOCRATIC ONLINE NOW EVENT ATOF NUS.ORG.UK THEYEAR

...can you afford not to?

Interested in a career? e2 Lifestyle is looking for an additional Deputy Editor.

If you are interested in applying please email editor@epigram.org.uk by Monday 30th January with an example of your writing and an explanation of what you think you could bring to the Epigram team.

You don’t have to like pugs to work here, but it helps

Lifestyle

Editor: Olivia Stephany whatson@epigram.org.uk

Best of Bristol

LORD OF THE DANCE

Nightclubs

1. Motion, Avon Street Best for: Music Buffs. Bristol has long been considered a dance-music trail blazer in terms of its unrivalled variety and enthusiastic revellers. And its spiritual home has come to be Motion, where, since 2010 with the creation of Bristol In: Motion, the top DJs, both well established and cutting edge, come to play. In the 2011 ‘season’ alone, the expansive system of warehouses, ramp room and tunnels played host to the likes of Cocoon, High Contrast, DJ Yoda and Annie Mac, amongst many others.

23 – 29 Jan Bristol Hippodrome £31.50 - £36.50

2. Lizard Lounge, Queens Road

What’s On

Described by the Los Angeles Times as a ‘show piece extravaganza’ Michael Flatley’s Lord of the Dance is a magical adventure of sight and sound that transports its audience to a mythical time and place, lifting the spirits and capturing the hearts of all who experience it.

Best for: mid-week boozing. It’s total crap but we all love it. Delightfully sticky floors, jugs of inexplicable green goo, and bouncers that will break your nose as soon as they look at you, Lounge is the club of choice for students on a mid-week bender. The only place to go when you want to dance to Chesney Hawkes, snog someone from two years below and lose a tooth. In a good way.

FILM AT 51

3. The Big Chill, Small Street

New weekly film event screening film noir, old school, retro or classic flicks plus fresh homemade popcorn & wood fired oven Pizza. Once a month after the film, Bar 51 give both amateur and pro home movie makers the chance to showcase and promote home made short films.

Best for: Vibezz. Everyone loves a roof terrace. And everyone loves free entry. Throw in a good looking, good-time crowd and you’re onto a winner. Not huge on the student scene, The Big Chill is full of nooks and crannies and hidden away outdoor areas, perfect for chilling the hell out. While music can be hit or miss, when they get it right they do so in a big way, like ‘90s House legend Robert Owens who brought the roof down back in November.

4. Reflex, Baldwin Street

Fashion

Best for: ‘80s Ridiculousness. ‘80s tunes, mirror balls, podiums and a DJ with a mullet. Need I say more?

25 Jan Number 51 Free

5. Milk Thistle, Colston Avenue Best for: ‘Coz after the party there’s the after party... 2am and the bars are winding down. You ring the doorbell and are greeted by a smartly dressed young chap who ushers you clandestinely into a dimly lit hallway. Moments later you are draped over a leather arm chair next to a roaring fire, supping on a whiskey sour. Somewhere between a speak easy and gentleman’s club, Milk Thistle makes you feel very, very cool. The absolute smoothest way to finish your night.

Izzy Finbow

Money

Travel

... and what do they think of Bristol?

When it came to choosing my Erasmus destination I was a bit lost. In spite all the myths about Spain as the ideal location for Erasmus parties and night life, I wanted to go to the UK in order to improve my English. Nevertheless I didn’t know much about England so I looked at some information about places like Reading, Bristol, Cardiff and Leicester. In the end I chose Bristol because it looked big but not enormous, and also I heard there were plenty of students. Apart from these few pieces of information, when I landed in Bristol at the end of September I really had no idea what to expect.

My first impression of the city was definitely positive. I got struck at first by the richness of green spaces, the freshness I felt on the harbour side, the powerful sight of the Wills Memorial Building at the top of Park Street, crowded by young people: all this made me think Bristol was the ideal place for student life. Within just a few days here, I had already started to enjoy the status of an Erasmus student, getting involved in all the activities and social events organized for us. Through all the welcoming parties and dinners I got to know a lot of people from all over the world very quickly and very soon I felt part of the Erasmus community in Bristol. Also, I was about to discover the cool aspects of higher education in the UK which are lacking in Italy. Through university, students can become involved in an impressive variety of sports and activities, often mixing fun with intellectual growth. During Freshers’ Week, I spent all my time running around with bags full of free stuff, trying to sort out my priorities and to not enlist in every single society that looked interesting.

With the beginning of lessons, I was struck by the superiority of UoB facilities: a multimedia centre with big flat screens, soft couches and an entire cinema were available to us! Indeed, university here is more expensive than in Italy but from what I can see, students get a lot more for their money. Summing up, I’m having an awesome time in Bristol so far. As typical of all Erasmus experiences, I will remember it more for the fun I had and people I met than for the progressions in my studies. After all the house parties and nights on the Triangle, I definitely don’t regret my decision to choose Bristol instead of Barcelona.

Giovanni Pigni

LIFE MONDAYS The newest addition to the Bristol night life scene:Pam Pam is located conveniently on the Triangle. This is the night Bristol students have been waiting for. The city’s leading DJs will be playing classic student anthems and the chart toppers you know and love.

Every Monday Pam Pam £5

SLAPSTICK FESTIVAL 2012 Bristol’s own silent and visual comedy festival returns with an incredible line-up of special events. The guests include Barry Cryer, Bill Oddie, Graeme Garden, Tim Brooke-Taylor, Ian Lavender and Sanjeev Bhaskar.

26 – 30 Jan Watershed, Arnolfini and Colston Hall

23. 01. 2012 MAYDAY MAYDAY

DRAMSOC 24 HR PLAY

Take a seat in the Belleville Rendez-vous, a 1950s cabaret bar and witness the fantastical and touching story of orphaned cycling fanatic, Champion, his grandmother and their corpulent dog, Bruno.

The death of winter, the birth of summer. A man falls head first off a wall.

Years later he tries to remember what happened next. This is a true story.

Told by the man who fell. ‘A life affirming story.’ (Bristol Evening Post)

Writers, directors, actors – this one’s for you! Don’t miss out on this low commitment and fun play. The premise is that the whole show is written, directed, rehearsed and performed in the space of 24hrs kick-started with a fun audition workshop, which will be held on the 27th January.

24 Jan – 4 Feb Tobacco Factory £7 concessions

26 Jan – 4 Feb Bristol Old Vic £12/£8

Last weekend of Jan

BLACK POND

Bluescreen is Bristols’ longest running Independent Open Screen Film event. Just bring films (under 20mins) along on DVD or MiniDV. Any film genre welcomed, the more eclectic mix the better!

Directed by Bertrand Bonello, ‘House of Tolerance’ is a fascinating insight into the opium and champagneblurred life of twelve sex workers in a high class Paris brothel at the end of the Belle Epoque in 1900.

Impressive dark comedy from first time directors Will Sharpe and Tom Kingsley. It’s a stylish film with a great script and fine performances throughout.

Simon Amstell makes his screen début as a twisted psychotherapist. A masterclass in low-budget film making.

25 Jan The Cube £2

27 Jan onwards Watershed £5.60 concessions

30 Jan – 1 Feb The Cube £4

CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH

JUST JACK’S 6TH BIRTHDAY

Head down to O2 Academy to see this legendary DJ do his thing. Producer Mr Scruff plays across the board, taking in soul, funk, hip hop, jazz, reggae, dubstep, ska and more.

Clap Your Hands Say Yeah (often abbreviated CYHSY) is an American indie rock group based in Brooklyn, New York. Don’t miss out on what will be an awesome gig down on the river at Thekla.

Head down to Motion to celebrate Just Jack’s 6th birthday with music from Maya Jane Coles, JEFK and Matt Tolfrey among other top-class djs.

28 Jan O2 Academy £12.50

4 February Thekla £12.50 adv

4 February Motion £12

GIMME SHELTER! BOUTIQUE

TEN

Head down to The Lanes for one of Bristol’s biggest vintage fairs where you will find an incredible array of clothes, jewellery, accessories, records and books, among other things.

Over the course of Arnolfini’s 50th anniversary year, artist Neil Cummings has developed a series of self portraits of the organisation.

Presented throughout the building, these portraits trace Arnolfini’s history and speculate on possible futures.

This is the tenth joint exhibition for Bristol artists Joan Wilson and Arril Johnson. Joan is showing acrylic paintings from her ‘Other Things’ series and Arril is exhibiting photographs taken in and around Bristol.

31 Jan The Lanes Free

Until 19 Feb Arnolfini Free

Until 25 Feb Colston Hall Free

Extras

NEIL CUMMINGS SELF PORTRAIT

Sound

MR SCRUFF

Screen

HOUSE OF TOLERANCE

BLUESCREEN

Stage

BELLEVILLE RENDEZVOUS

Fashion Travel Money

The Great British takeover I

n April 2009 British high street staple Topshop opened its first American store in New York to overwhelming crowds and intense excitement from fashion lovers across the Atlantic.

Despite the current economic climate Topshop has proven a success in the USA and opened another store in Chicago in September 2011, rumoured to be part of 12-15 planned openings.

denim dungarees and fully buttoned up Peter Pan collared shirts, is said to embody ‘the kind of fashion boys just don’t get’, which is to say the kind of fashion which does not have looking either sexy or pretty as its primary aim.

Lagerfeld favourite Florence Welch’s blend of eclectic, Victoriana style has enabled her to become as famous for her fashion sense as her singing.

Celebrities Olivia Palermo, Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz are all big fans of Topshop so although the brand is ubiquitous on British high streets, its American customers are obviously not just limited to those who can’t afford designer. So what makes Topshop so popular amongst American buyers?

Firstly, mid-range fashion, especially that which closely follows catwalk trends, is more limited in the US than Britain.

From the mainstream heartland of Macy’s to the vintage Lower East side boutiques, a trip around New York displays a larger void between high end designer and thrift store chic than in London, where a wider variety of incomes are catered for.

Secondly, and importantly, is the specifically British, idiosyncratic confusion of the ever-changing designs offered by Topshop. In contrast to the insipid Americana of Forever 21, recently exported from the USA to Britain, Topshop unashamedly promotes a uniquely odd way of dressing. To understand this more fully it is useful to think of several British style icons who all, to some degree, embody this peculiar aesthetic.

The poster girl for British fashion has got to be Alexa Chung, a woman who, through her penchant for items like

Deputy: Lizzy Bullock deputyfashion@ epigram.org.uk

Wishlist

Alexander McQueen became associated with eccentrically diverse, artistic creations and a younger generation including Erdem Moralioglu, Christopher Kane and Mary Katrantzou are continuing to produce beautifully strange designs.

What, as Elle’s February issue noted, is invigorating about this new group of designers is their apparent ability to combine incredible creativity with sensible business plans, giving London Fashion Week and British fashion the professional edge previously lacking.

Bralet, Topshop, £30

Additionally, a fascinating aspect to these designers - and perhaps about British style in general- is the gorgeous mixture of cultures encapsulated in their ensembles. Of the three mentioned above, Kane is Scottish, Katrantzou is Greek and Moralioglu has Canadian, Turkish, and British heritage. As British fashion begins to compete more readily internationally, it will be refreshing to see a modern version of Britain presented; not simply tweed and diamond-patterned socks.

Topshop S/S 12

What’s On

Lifestyle

Editor: Francesca Clayton fashion@ epigram.org.uk

Less eccentric variants on British dress come courtesy of more classic dressers like Emma Watson and her streamlined, gamine look or Agyness Deyn who embodies a 80s/90s version of British androgynous punk.

This distinctive way of dressing has long been the hallmark of British designers themselves. Established favourites Vivienne Westwood and

Diverse cultural influences and avantgarde ideas are what make Topshop proudly legitimise a very British way of dressing. Aside from America, Topshop have also been successful in other countries, including the new Rich Kid’s Playground, Dubai.

Wellies, Hunter, £125

When questioning an expat resident in the United Arab Emirates on the prevalence of British brands in a land where money is not an issue, she replied, ‘I do not know what Topshop have put in everyone’s tea, but the whole world has fallen in love with it’.

Rosemary Wagg

Satchel, ASOS, £20

What does British Fashion mean to you?

I

T

could probably articulate my love for British fashion through its latest high street trends, or that slick city style but having lived in the countryside my whole life among knitted jumpers, floral dresses, and wellington boots, for me, it’s actually a lot closer to home.

The person who perfectly defines my British ideal is interior and fashion designer, Kath Kidston. I love the way she is able to bring fashion into the context of a ‘vintage style’ country home. She creates cosy, natural looking clothes that still manage to evoke a cool style, and what could be more British than throwing together clashing prints that still look stylish?

o me, British fashion represents the fearlessness of the British public and their refusal to conform.

Bag, Vivienne Westwood, £220

Pencil skirt, River Island, £20

Designers, like the musicians they often work with, strive to reinvent and expand British culture, permanently pushing the boundaries to produce something unique. Fashions and trends are often repeated, however whilst clothes may return, the sense of individual style in Britain continues to evolve.

It’s the homely outfits, the floral patterns and cashmere socks that most define British fashion for me.

Ali Crossland

Take the 1970s punks who stomped down London pavements in leather, studs and bondage gear in the wake of anarchic idols such as the Sex Pistols.

Thanks to Vivienne Westwood this rebellious image exploded into high fashion, and Westwood continues to lead the way down Britain’s esteemed and eclectic catwalk.

Bag, Cath Kidston, £30

Claudia Knowles

Brogues, Topshop, £60

23. 01. 2012

Fashion gets fit for 2012 W

The uniforms won’t just be en vogue though – the tracksuits epitomize the fusion of the worlds of fashion and technology. The kits boast numerous performance-enhancing elements, including a ‘turn-back’ feature to suit different arm lengths. Each kit will also contain potentially the most beneficial ‘accessory’ one could be offered during a British summer – an umbrella.

“fitness has become fashionable”

Kenzo S/S 12

But by no means is the sporting trend exclusive to the Olympics. It has spread like wildfire through the world of fashion since the Spring/Summer 12 catwalk shows.

McCartney has designed an additional range of clothing but this time more suitable for the run-way than the running track. Marc by Marc Jacobs teamed preppy sweatshirts with

leather skirts while Vera Wang’s dresses had the sleek lines of a wetsuit. The likes of Kenzo and Aquascutum unveiled urban street style sporting looks, built around hi-tech anoraks.

Lanvin and Antonio Berardi channelled a loosely tailored, sports luxe look, defined by a clean monochrome palette.

Stella McCartney S/S 12

And who better to dress the British athletes than home-grown super talent Stella McCartney? The designer has been appointed creative director of Adidas’ 2012 Olympics team GB ranges, and will create the kit for both national Olympic and Paralympic teams.

Inkeeping with truly British style, the uniforms were inspired by the heritage and culture of the UK, with influences extending from the Grenadier Guards’ uniform to Henley Regatta fashions.

Kenzo S/S 12

ith the 2012 London Olympics bringing the spirit of athleticism, fitness has become fashionable. From sports casual to luxe sportswear, Olympic fashion is indeed the movement inspiring the Spring/ Summer 12 catwalks.

Style Jury

But the high street scores sporting points too; from Isabel Marant’s suede high tops to Ashish for Topshop’s tongue-in-cheek skiwear collection. Unfortunately two key looks to expect are punchy, fluorescent brights and cycle shorts, worn visibly under skirts – perhaps not the most flattering trends we would have hoped for.

This recent fitness frenzy has even led to the newfound attitude that keeping fit is key.

There’s no denying that New Year’s resolutions and excess Christmas podge are playing their part, but keeping fit does indeed appear to be the current favoured pastime.

With innovative classes from ‘Xtend Barre’ to military-style boot camps, and new tonednot-skinny model muses such as Karlie Kloss, (she loves her ballet!) we are surrounded by gym-spiration.

The London 2012 Olympics have brought with them not only the principal trend for S/S 2012, but also patriotism and athleticism. We should all use it as an excuse to celebrate the very best of British sport, history and (most importantly) fashion.

Lizi Woolgar

S

tella McCartney’s block printed all-inone nails the Spring/Summer 12 trend for pjama party style - but what did you think of the look?

‘Love this print. I wish it fitted her/her legs were longer. The matching sunnies and bag are too much. It’s like, Stella, babe, get ya measurements right.’

Linds, Drama and French, third year ‘It’s classy and cutting edge.’

George, Human Geography, second year.

‘I like it, but it needs a belt, a tan, and preferably a yacht.’

Harriet, Drama, third year.

‘It doesn’t look like it fits very well. The plus side is she probably won’t get camel toe.’

Matt, Classics, third year

Home-grown talent L

oved by the world’s A-list and with 473 stores in 48 countries, Burberry is undoubtedly one of British fashion’s success stories.

heroes – dominated by the classic check pattern. Since then however, Burberry has completely rebranded itself, largely through high fashion advertising campaigns

Redmayne.

The latest offering from Burberry is its Spring/Summer 2012 pre ready-to-wear collection, which features all the classic

Established in 1856 by Thomas Burberry the original focus was on sturdy outdoor wear. Most people would agree that the trench coat is one of Burberry’s most iconic items, but not many are aware that in 1914, Burberry was commissioned by the British war office to make sturdier coats that would resist the constant drizzle for its officers during World War One - hence “trench” coat.

During the 1970s the label became associated with casualwear, which was lapped up by footballers (and their WAGs). This spawned a culture of cheap fake Burberry knock-offs aimed at those wanting to imitate their sporting

In 2011, the brand was named the most digitally competent luxury brand by New York University and Burberry started live-streaming their twice-yearly catwalk shows at London Fashion Week, adding the ability for customers to buy straight from the runway for delivery in seven weeks (the collections aren’t usually available for months).

The Burberry show is always one of the most highly anticipated, and never fails to attract a star-studded front row or surprise audiences – even having snow falling on to the runway during the Autumn/Winter 2011 collection preview. What’s more, as of January 2012, Burberry is officially the most popular luxury brand on Facebook and Twitter, with an astounding ten million fans and 701,617 followers respectively.

Burberry S/S 12

Since then, this classic mac has been snapped up by fashionistas the world over, immortalised as a sign of timeless elegance

by Audrey Hepburn in that iconic scene at the end of the film, Breakfast At Tiffany’s.

On the Burberry website it’s now possible to customise your own bespoke trench, choosing the colour, length, fabric, belt, buttons and more (although it could set you back a cool £2,795!)

embellishment.

As Chief Creative Officer, Christopher Bailey can be credited with Burberry’s continuing success and the company is currently one of the most innovative companies in the fashion industry.

featuring models such as Rosie HuntingtonWhitely and Emma Watson. The latest campaign (pictured above) stars Cara Delevigne and actor-of-the-moment Eddie

pieces this iconic brand is known and loved for, but also keeps things fresh with a distinctly tribal feel, for example, chunky necklaces, zig-zag prints and beaded

When asked what she thought of Burberry, a top London fashion buyer responded with “true British style”, and that just about sums it up.

Rachel Hosie

Deputy: Lizzy Bullock deputyfashion@ epigram.org.uk

home town glory ladylike pencil skirts, pastel coloured lace and vintage headscarves come together for a very British take on this season’s trends.

Travel

Fashion

What’s On

Lifestyle

Editor: Francesca Clayton fashion@ epigram.org.uk

This page clockwise from left:

Money

Cardigan, Yumi. Scarf, Motel. Bralet, skirt, wellies and sunglasses, stylist’s own.

Cardigan and dress, Yumi. Scarf and bag, Motel. Shoes, model’s own.

Dress, Yumi. Scarves, Motel. Sunglasses, as before.

Opposite page clockwise from top: Cardigan and dress, Yumi. Belt, stylist’s own.

Bag, Motel. Dress, scarves, wellies and sunglasses as before.

23. 01. 2012

Beauty Best of British Britain’s botanical heritage, traditional apothecary history and a cosmopolitan fashion industry have combined to produce some of the world’s leading fragrance, skincare and makeup brands – including these best-selling favourites: Makeup - RImmel With ambassadors such as Kate Moss and Georgia May Jagger, this affordable high street brand combines fun packaging and on-trend colours, allowing teenagers and celebrities around the world to ‘Get the London Look’.

Union Jack Eyeshadow £6.99 Fragrance - Jo Malone

Photographer: Ben Eddings Styling: Francesca Clayton and Lizzy Bullock Hair & Makeup: Coco Creme Model: Emily Fitzgerald

With beautifully crafted fragrances using natural botanical extracts, this brand combines classic British fragrances and luxurious minimalistic packaging. They have been crafting their signature perfumes for over 130 years and bear the illustrious Royal Warrant – a mark of quality so good that the brand is a favourite with they Royal Family.

English Pear and Freesia Cologne £36 Bath & Body - LUSH Lush founders Mark & Mo Constantine have won an OBE for their contribution to cosmetic innovation and their commitment to ethical ingredient sourcing. From fun, fruity bath bombs to expert natural skincare, this brand is known for its packaging-free products. Over 70% of their products are vegan too.

Olive Branch £4.25 Anisha Gupta

Money

Travel

Fashion

What’s On

Lifestyle

Editor: Verity Stockdale travel@epigram .org.uk

Centros Sociales Okupados:

The emergence of social centres in Madrid

their belongings. Elderly and children were present as well. They were treated a bit more kindly than the rest.” Until then, families had been free to come and go, and 15-M meetings were held in the hotel to organise peaceful demonstrations and hold forums to discuss broad themes such as the environment, education, and health. Though squatting is illegal in Spain, activists have taken on the law by echoing Article 47 of the Spanish Constitution: ‘All Spaniards have the right to a dignified living space’.

In its unprecedented financial crisis, Madrileños are reclaiming some of their abandoned heritage. These past five years have seen a revival of centros sociales okupados – ‘occupied social centres’ or squats in Madrid. A rise in vacant buildings coupled with swathes of families evicted from their homes has led people to squat for both ideological purposes and to survive. The most well-known of these is perhaps the Hotel Madrid, which was occupied by activists of the 15-M or indignados movement, a series of on-going demonstrations in Spain which demand a radical change in Spanish politics, and can be linked to protests in the Middle East, North Africa, Greece and Portugal.

On 5th December 2011 at 7am the hotel was evacuated. An ex-inhabitant reports, “Police were well informed about the situation that they would find inside. They knew that most of the families had already been relocated in other squats...They were awoken rudely, they didn’t get the chance to gather

The word ‘squat’ often evokes mistrust and can be associated with radicalism, anarchism and even terrorism. Yet many of these abandoned buildings serve broader needs and are often sadly misunderstood. Miguel Martinez, a Madrid-based CSA (Social Centre Appropriation) activist who also happens to be a Professor of Sociology at the Autonomous University of Madrid, points out that social centres serve community needs. They function as an alternative housing strategy, as well as providing a public resource for meetings, information, leisure, expression and sociability. It gives unemployed people who are used to being highly productive, something to do.

close at 11pm daily and a placard reads, Social Centre or Botellón? We allow beer/Leave your cans outside. Think/Use the bin. There’s a queue/ Well wait.

Journalists flock to the Tabacalera, calling it ‘an example of the cultural revival in Madrid’ (El País).

These reviews dispel mistrust of squats, especially when the Ministry of Culture approves of them, which tends only to fund large-scale institutions such as Madrid’s Golden Triangle (the Prado, ThyssenBornemisza and Reina Sofia museums).

The Tabacalera is one of many cultural centres which are slowly gaining autonomy and prestige.

More interestingly, they are changing attitudes and engaging journalists, lawyers, politicians and ordinary people in debates on what illegality means in the context of homes, freedom of speech and human rights.

Lux Paterson

The resulting creativity at some of these social centres is key to their legal status. Some centres have seen so much artistic activity and renovation as a result of their occupation that they have come to be known as cultural centres instead of simply ‘social centres’. One of these is an old tobacco factory, La Tabacalera which was acknowledged by the Ministry of Culture in 2010 as a public space. Its 27,000m2 of factory floors are now a venue for gigs, exhibitions, workshops ranging from martial arts to dancing lessons (free) and a shop where people don’t buy but exchange possessions. It’s a space which is being constantly renewed but also monitored. The doors

Santiago : The South American Dream Images of dusty streets filled with flee-ridden dogs, ethnically clad women and roaring street vendors were firmly rooted in my mind before arriving in the Chilean capital of Santiago.

However, as my taxi pulled up to a very modern block of apartments in the fashionable district of Las Condes, I began to think that my preconceptions may have been a little naive. In fact, the flee-ridden dogs still roam the streets of Santiago’s wealthy, business district, but this is just one of the many examples of Chile’s conflicting image. Las Condes is home to an array of international chains, such as Starbucks and Dunkin’ Donuts, separated by chic sushi restaurants, American sports bars and Irish pubs.

Chile’s recent economic growth and increasing international influence has made Santiago a city of stark contrast between the international, fast-paced lifestyle of the west and the indigenous charm of a south American country. One only has to drive ten minutes from the modern luxuries of the areas of

Las Condes and Vitacura to find the dilapidated, multicoloured houses with corrugated tin roofs where poverty is the norm.

Whilst doing work experience in an international company, I was often in the presence of successful, well-educated and

‘My colleagues seemed keen to embrace everything that was not Chilean’ consequently well-off Chileans.

My colleagues always seemed keen to embrace everything that was not Chilean. Heineken, Budweiser and Stella Artois were the beers of choice and the Chilean brews of Escudo, Cristal or Austral were rejected, to be consumed only by a less image-conscious Chilean in a local bar. Slogans for billboards and packaging were often

written in english and when I asked if the average Chilean understood these slogans, I was told that most did not.

Irrelevant was the meaning behind the words – the english language itself gave an exotic brand image of distinction and quality, apparently.

Chile has a wealth of resources with its fertile soil, expansive coastline, fresh fruit, vegetables and fish in abundance.

However, the supermarket chains of Jumbo and Unimarc have monopolised, just like Tesco and Sainsburys over here.

On visiting the dirty, noisy, but charming, markets of the city, it was clear that the poorest families shopped there. Despite the guarantee of fresh, local produce at honest prices, the wealthier Chilean has, just as in England, yielded to the comfort of supermarket shopping. The recent boom of the country’s economy has raised salaries of the most successful business people to sums comparable to their international counterparts and drives an ever-growing western culture norm.

However, scratching deeper beneath the new, Americanised façade, one will find the Chilean core that lies beneath. Whilst visiting the family home of a colleague for the weekend, I met Alicia; a plump lady in her sixties dressed in a maid’s outfit – the family’s nana, common in the humblest of middle-class Chilean households. Alicia single-handedly prepared us a three-course lunch and served us at the beautifully-laid table.

Alicia cooked these meals every day and, meanwhile, she would

wash, clean, look after the children and eventually retreat to her boxy bedroom at the back of the kitchen each night.

This is one of the numerous contradictions of Chilean society. For the lower strata of society, from which come the women working as nanas, there remains the measly minimum wage of around £215 per month – proof that Santiago’s social clash is yet to find its harmony.

Lizzie Lerwill

23.01.2012

The world’s...

Most ridiculous competitive eaters The majority of Brits gain about 2kg during the Christmas season at home, so why not gain weight in style and break a world record in doing so; for example, by beating the turkey-eating record by gobbling more than 3.4kg in 10 minutes?

The International Federation of Competitive Eating (IFOCE) regulates over 80 competitions annually across a variety of food disciplines around the world.

and unsurprisingly spends his spare time collecting rubber bands for his rubber band ball and is still trying to beat Arnie “Chowhound” Chapman who swallows pickles along with his pride at a rate of 1.33kg in 3 minutes 45 seconds. His innovative technique is “putting two in at a time, chomping them and swallowing hard”.

12 pints of Addlestone’s cider and a live set by the Wuzel’s probably had something to do with Mike Hobbs’ victory at the World Stinging Nettle Eating Championship.

His battle wounds included his hands and face turning black from being stung, foaming acid from the mouth and being unable to speak for two days. All this to be crowned the global nettle nosher and gain a crate of beer. Mike beat 65 other competitors by plucking and eating leaves from 48 ft of nettles.

So who’s up for all-you-can-eat chicken wings at Hooters?

Lizzie Ashby

Photo of the fortnight

On the 12th September 2011, the annual pickle-eating competition took place at the Isle Casino in Florida. Patrick ‘Deep Dish’ Bertoletti, aged 26 from Chicago, managed to eat 2.35kg of sour pickles in 6 mins. He is ranked second in the world by the IFOCE

‘Kobayashi vs ‘The Bear’, which I assumed was a stage name. It was not.’

Sebastian Bergmann

Viewed by 2.8m youtube users, first up is Kobayashi (a 5ft 8 Japanese competitive eater who weighs a mere 58 kg) vs. ‘The Bear’, which I assumed was a stage name. It was not. It is actually a 1089lb Kodiak Bear. The show labelled Man vs.

Beast, reminds me of a WWF wrestling match, until the bear comes out and they start a sausageeating race. Although losing to the beast, which managed to eat 50 hot dogs in 2 mins 36 secs, Kobayashi still managed to eat 31 hotdogs in the allotted time. Impressive.

Last year at St Leonard Place, Edinburgh, the world’s hottest chilli contest took place. Fortunately for the curry house, all competitors signed legal disclaimers as 10 dropped to the ground and two were hotfooted off to hospital.

Curie Kim - ironically pronounced ‘curry’ - described it as being sawn in the stomach with a chainsaw, all in order to win a plastic trophy and crown. Beverly Jones, crowned Curry Queen after managing 9 spoonfuls of the chilli dish, exclaimed that it was all about ‘mind over matter’.

Ainhoa Barcelona: Lake Titicaca, Peru

As someone who had only spent two weeks in France in her life (I know, I probably shouldn’t have been allowed to even do a degree in French), I had very little experience of la vie française. I chose Lille not for its close proximity to England, but for its vibrant cultural life – as a former European Capital of Culture, there was bound to be loads going on. Yet I think that in the back of my mind, I always thought, “it’s only an hour and a half away from London on the Eurostar, how different can it be?”

Within my first week of arriving, I realised how wrong I’d been.

Granted, all the basics of English life were there; supermarkets, banks, even Friends every night. But there were a few subtle differences which made my first few weeks somewhat interesting. For example, everything except churches, florists, and cafés closes on Sundays; not an open supermarket in sight. Let’s not forget the traffic light system, where the comfortingly safe glow of the green man directs pedestrians onto the crossing as traffic is turning onto it, resulting in a kind of deathly game of ‘chicken’ between driver and pedestrian. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

However, after adjusting to the differences – and indeed after learning to plan Sunday meals in advance, as well as perfecting a scary ‘You will let me cross the road’ face – I really started to enjoy French life. I found a fantastic apartment and my new flatmates opened my eyes to the great aspects of Lille; delicious fresh produce from the markets, all things Ch’ti, cycling along la Deûle, the endless supply of exhibitions, arts cinemas and gigs, not to mention the fantastic Belgian beers and outdoor cafés...the list goes on. Ultimately, I still saw myself as a temporary resident and I considered England as my true ‘home’, but I was having a blast all the same.

It was only on returning to England for les vacances de Noël that I realised things had changed. As we travelled between the Eurotunnel and London, all my excitement about returning to my homeland was replaced by a sense of disappointment, although I didn’t know why. Being surrounded by people speaking in my mother tongue should have comforted me, but it didn’t. And at the supermarket, instead of taking pleasure in being able to buy my favourite English products, I found myself lamenting over how under-nourished and unappetising the fruit and veg looked. I missed France. Plus it appeared that I’d soaked up more French culture than I’d first thought, trying to kiss people on both cheeks when I was introduced to them and wanting to drive on the right, not the left.

I realised that although I loved seeing my friends and family, I didn’t feel at home in England any more. When I arrived back in Lille and found myself smiling when I was promptly nearly run over on a pedestrian crossing, I finally realised that it was here that I felt right. Despite the cultural differences and the fact that I still can’t quite speak the language fluently, France has become my ‘home sweet home’ without me even noticing, and I hope that it will continue to be for many years to come.

Kate Bennett Foreign Correspondent - France

Home for most represents stability.

We all know what happens when you build your house on sand, but for the Uros people a patch of floating reeds is good enough.

Legend has it that for fear of enslavement by the Incas, the tribe fled to open water and intrepidly built their houses from whatever they could, in this case totora reeds.

The notion of living on a floating mass has attracted tourists to visit in order to experience the bizarre

state of treading on ground that actually rocks beneath you. Cynics shout that it’s a blatant tourist trap, something you’d see on your Gap Yah. All the island’s a stage, and all the Uros merely players.

Whether this is all just rumour with the hope of stirring controversy, what’s certain is that the floating villages will always be, for the ‘people of the lake’, home sweet home.

wikipedia (Remih)

‘This one time in Perah’

AIR MAIL

“I realised that although I loved seeing my friends and family, I didn’t feel at home in England any more.”

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Editor: Alex Denne treasurer@ epigram.org.uk

Just an iFad? Apple became the most valuable public company in the world a month before Steve Jobs died last October, and due to the debt-ceiling crisis, in July 2011, Apple’s financial reserves were greater than that of the US Government.

Apple forever-changed the mp3 player with the iPod in 2003, reinvented the phone with the iPhone in 2007 and then pioneered the tablet market with the iPad in 2010. Apple products and software managed to produce revenue of over £100bn last year alone. But how?

I was one of the first people to mock iPads when they came out because it’s just a pretentious gadget, but behind the gimmicks, what could an iPad really do for your degree?

This review details just two ways that an iPad can help you to improve your organisation and note taking.

Organisation. We all like to think we’re organised, but there’s always room for improvement. By using Evernote Web Clipper with Evernote for iPad and iPhone, it’s possible to instantly save a webpage, PDF or document and search through its text a week later by the click of a button. If you’d prefer to take a picture of your handwritten notes, Evernote will attempt to recognise and index your writing in order to make it searchable. With the ability to directly search within every note you’ve ever written, every lecture you’ve ever sat in and every topic you’ve ever studied, you can and will save hours of precious time searching for an exact piece of information.

Note Taking. Printing out lectures slides before each lecture can be expensive and time consuming but with Notability, it’s possible to create a phenomenal set of lecture notes. As well as being able to annotate PDF’s and other documents, you can add handwritten notes, complimentary text and web clippings to a set of slides, and that’s not all. With Notability, you can record audio from your lecture and attach it to specific equations or slides; this means that when you revise those slides 3 months later, you can hear the exact words of your lecturer. Oh, and just in case you were worried about losing all of these priceless notes, they’re automatically backed up to your Dropbox.

Before we can answer this question, you need to be able to put a value on your degree. I’m spending £10,000 on tuition and getting £10,000 further in debt with the aid of my student loan, I therefore consider my degree to be very expensive.

I still don’t think that an iPad is worth the money ‘for fun’, but when I figured out exactly what I wanted to use it for then it surpassed my best expectations.

There’s no other tool so brilliantly multifarious and portable yet it’s also incredibly intuitive and enjoyable.

How much money would you be willing to spend to guarantee yourself an extra 2-4%, pushing your 2:2 closer to a 2:1 or your 2:1 towards a 1st? I believe that buying an iPad could do just that and if any tool can help me make better use of my £20,000 degree, I’m going to seriously consider it.

All these properties make for a tempting investment and with student discount now available on all iPads, I genuinely think I’m going to buy one.

Fashion

‘I’ve seen the future of TV, and its name is Zeebox’ Who are you and what is Zeebox?

Anthony Rose, Co-founder and CTO of Zeebox.

Zeebox is a great free app which enables everyone to interact with everyone else watching the same TV channel whilst simultaneously providing you with relevant tweets, news and information. We call it augmentainment.

as your imagination. Then cinema came along and you would have one cinema in a town which created a shared experience for everyone to come out and talk about, these days we often have individual experiences of what we watch on TV. Zeebox tries to rekindle the lost campfire experience by bringing people together for a shared experience on a virtual sofa.

‘Put yourself out there and go for it’

Money

Travel

What idea created Zeebox and what are zeetags?

We commissioned a 5,000 person consumer survey which contradicted the ‘death of TV’. It became apparent that we’re watching more TV than ever and we’re using companion devices more and more in order to interact with what we’re watching. Wouldn’t it be brilliant if something could collate all the information relevant to what you’re watching on TV in real time, improving our veg-out habits to veg 2.0.

‘Zeebox brings people together for a shared experience’ Zeebox ingests the speech of channels and then extracts the entities from within them, these entities are zeetags and if you click the zeetag you gain access to infomative tools about that entity. For example, if Tom Cruise appears on Top Gear Zeebox will analyse the words ‘Tom Cruise’ and will display a clickable ‘Tom Cruise’ zeetag instantly giving you all the information about Tom Cruise that you could possibly want. This idea is extended to give you information on mentioned songs, places, people or teams.

Your recent £10m+ deal with BSkyB gives exclusive rights in the UK to Sky’s media apps, how hard was it for you to make this decision?

When you have a completely new innovation such as Zeebox, some will see it as complimentary and some as obstructive, having Sky as a partner brings zeebox into the mainstream and legitimises zeebox as a new opportunity for everyone. It’s ‘Win-Win’.

Zeebox is already valued at £100m, only 6 months down the line, what advice would you give to the students of Bristol with a unique idea?

You also have to be careful not to be too secretive about an idea. Some people can be so scared of someone copying their idea that this fear can result in key people or potential business partners never hearing about them. I have an open door policy where I’m frank and openly share my views which I believe has contributed to my being invited to speak at events and conferences. You need to be suitably open without giving your secret sauce away.

What new features are you currently working on for Zeebox 2.0?

Things that are absolutely on our road-map include team chat rooms for sports programs and audio recognition for on-demand programs and movies.

These features will change Zeebox from a live TV companion to a universal social tool whilst watching the same movie or episode of friends at anytime.

Finally, what does ‘Home sweet home’ mean to you (apart from enjoying veg 2.0 with Zeebox)?

What is social TV and why should people be interested in what Zeebox has to offer?

Long ago people sat around a campfire and told each other stories where the graphics were only as good

Obviously there’s risk but remember that nothing is ever set and that something can take off at any time!

We’ve been incredibly fortunate in a competitive market. One of the most important things is recognising your own strengths and weaknesses and working with people who have skills that would compliment your own.

If the stars align such that your idea seems commercially viable and it feels like the right time then you need to put yourself out there and go for it.

For me, there’s nothing finer than coming up with new products and ideas and writing the specifications for them whilst listening to classical music. People get joy out of many things so it’s really fortunate that my work aligns with what I get most joy out of.

Alex Denne