Issue 259 by Epigram

Do letting agencies get away with murder?

The rise of the video game

page 11

Best household gadgets page 31

page 29

Issue 252

Issue 259

Monday 18th February 2013 www.epigram.org.uk 25 years of Epigram Bristol University’s Independent Student Newspaper Georgina Winney

Hiatt Baker residents demand fee reduction to compensate for work

Controversy as sports head secretly lobbies ‘elite’ teams Sports clubs have reacted angrily after the university’s Director of Sport, Exercise and Health (SEH), Simon Hinks, circulated an email requesting captains of Bristol’s elite sports clubs to vote down an attempt to make sports more accessible. The motion at the students’ union’s Annual Members’ Meeting (AMM) aimed at reintroducing the pay as you go option for sports facilities at all times passed with 88% voting in favour. The pay as you go option was scrapped at the beginning of the year but reintroduced following a petition that attracted over 1500 signatures. continued on page 3

What can you buy for the price of a pint? Travel, e2

‘Meat-Free Mondays’ motion passed at AMM Marek Allen

Students are unhappy with noise levels and the closure of facilities. Adam Bushnell News Reporter Student Housing Special A motion was passed at this year’s students’ union AMM (Annual Members’ Meeting) to compensate the residents of Hiatt Baker Hall for the misery caused to them by ongoing construction work. The motion demanded a reduction in fees and improvement of living conditions for the hall’s students.

A large contingency of Hiatt Baker residents attended the AMM – in which the motion to compensate them was voted first in the priority ballot – only to leave as soon as it was passed with 85% voting in favour. Construction work for a new transport hub for all Stoke Bishop residents and the creation of an additional 339 bedrooms at Hiatt Baker Hall is well underway and is due for completion for the 2014 intake. But current Hiatt Baker residents are unhappy with their accommodation. In a letter of complaint to the university, Claudia

Summers, who proposed the motion, expressed her dissatisfaction. She described how the building works are ‘literally surrounding ABC blocks with a sea of mud, fences, metal barriers and diggers.’ ‘As you can imagine, this is not only aesthetically displeasing, it is also extremely claustrophobic and is not a place where anyone would want to live.’ She also said that advertised facilities such as the library, hairdressers, common room and bike storage have been closed and access to the hall has been restricted. continued on page 3

A motion to ban the sale of meat on campus on Mondays was narrowly passed at the students snion’s AMM (Annual Members’ Meeting). Many were disappointed that the motion was carried, with only 50% of students present voting in favour. The motion was designed to reduce the university’s environmental impact, with the proposer arguing that the world’s cattle consume enough food to sustain 9 billion people. But a student who had grown up in a family of sheep farmers argued against the proposal, claiming that we should instead concentrate on sourcing fresh, local meat. See page 3 for a summary of motions.

Ethical fashion fur better or worse? Style, e2

Epigram

18.02.2013

News

Editor: Jemma Buckley

Deputy Editor: Zaki Dogliani

Deputy Editor: Josephine McConville

news@epigram.org.uk

zdogliani@epigram.org.uk

jmcconville@epigram.org.uk

Editorial team Editor

Style Editor

Pippa Shawley

Lizi Woolgar

editor@epigram.org.uk

style@epigram.org.uk

Deputy Editors

Deputy Style Editor

Patrick Baker

Alice Johnston

patrick@epigram.org.uk

deputystyle@epigram.org.uk

Imogen Rowley

Arts Editor

imogen@epigram.org.uk

Rosemary Wagg

e2 Editor

arts@epigram.org.uk

Ant Adeane

Deputy Arts Editor

e2@epigram.org.uk

Rachel Schraer

News Editor

deputyarts@epigram.org.uk

Jemma Buckley

Music Editor

news@epigram.org.uk

Eliot Brammer

Deputy News Editors

music@epigram.org.uk

Zaki Dogliani

Deputy Music Editor

zdogliani@epigram.org.uk

Phil Gwyn

Josephine McConville

deputymusic@epigram.org.uk

jmcconville@epigram.org.uk

Film & TV Editor

Features Editor

Jasper Jolly

Nahema Marchal

filmandtv@epigram.org.uk

features@epigram.org.uk

Deputy Film & TV Editor

Deputy Features Editor

Kate Samuelson

Helena Blackstone

deputyfilmandtv@epigram.org.uk

deputyfeatures@epigram.org.uk

Science & Technology Editor

Comment Editor

Mary Melville

Joe Kavanagh

science@epigram.org.uk

comment@epigram.org.uk

Deputy Science Editor

Deputy Comment Editor

Erik Müürsepp

Nat Meyers

deputyscience@epigram.org.uk

deputycomment@epigram.co.uk

Sport Editor

Letters Editor

David Stone

Lucy De Greeff

sport@epigram.org.uk

letters@epigram.org.uk

Deputy Sport Editor

Living Editor

Laura Lambert

Imogen Hope Carter

deputysport@epigram.org.uk

living@epigram.org.uk

Proof Readers

Deputy Living Editor

Alana Weir Natasha Isaac Jessica Easton Carinthia Pearson Molly Hawes

Josephine Franks jfranks@epigram.org.uk Mona Tabbara mtabbara@epigram.org.uk Travel Editor Alicia Queiro travel@epigram.org.uk Deputy Travel Editor Alex Bradbrook deputytravel@epigram.org.uk

Advertise with Epigram? To enquire about advertising, please contact Leanne Melbourne - advertising@epigram.org.uk Epigram is the independent student newspaper of the University of Bristol. The views expressed in this publication are not those of the University or the Students’ Union. Epigram receives adminitrative help and the loan of office space from the University of Bristol Students’ Union but is editorially independent. The design, text and photographs are copyright of Epigram and its individual contributors and may not be reproduced without permission.

Editorial Epigram housing special Talk to any student at Bristol and they are sure to have a housing story to tell. From slug infestations to gas leaks due to faulty boilers, no one is safe from the impending threat of mildew and mice that student living brings. Things that seem so charming when viewing a property under a letting agent’s beady eye - sash windows, high ceilings, exposed brick work - come back to haunt us as winter sets in and brings with it cold draughts, expensive heating bills and inescapable dampness. And then there’s the agents themselves, who drive around in their cute, company-branded cars, paid for by the extortionate agency fees forced on naive students renting their first home. In this edition, we have looked at a range of housing issues, from the ongoing struggle for peace and quiet at Hiatt Baker (page 1) to the increase in students squatting in the city (page 9). This week we asked you whether you were satisfied with your student house, and a surprising 82% of you said that you were (page 13). But what about the other 18% who are paying out a fortune in rent to live in a house that is little better

than a shack? Should we settle for being treated as second-class citizens, preyed on by greedy landlords and grassed-up by nosey neighbours who go running to the university the moment you dare to leave your bins in the street for an extra day? We know that the stories in this issue are just the tip of the iceberg. We want to hear your stories of housing problems. Perhaps you’ve had suffered from continuous break-ins, been charged for damage you didn’t do or been left to pay extra rent after you housemate did a runner? We will investigate any stories you have, and answer questions that may arise as your house-hunting becomes more frantic as the Easter holiday looms. If the gallery of grim on page 7 reminds you of home, send in your pictures for our online gallery. Get in touch by emailing housing@epigram.org.uk, tweet us @EpigramPaper or find us on Facebook at facebook.com/ epigrampaper

Meetings

Getting Involved FAQs

News:

18th Feb, 12pm, White Bear

Features: 28th Feb, 1pm, White Bear Comment: 21st Feb, 1.30pm, White Bear Science & 12th March, 1.15pm, White Bear Tech:

1. ‘I have a really great idea for a story that I’d like to write. Who should I contact?’ This depends on the subject matter. Drop an email to the editor of the section you imagine your article appearing in. If it isn’t obvious which section it might go in, email editor@epigram.org.uk. You could also drop into one of our meetings (see left). 2. ‘I don’t have any writing experience. Can I still get involved?’

Living:

19th Feb, 1.15pm, White Bear

Travel:

18th Feb, 12.15pm, Refectory

Absolutely. Never again will you have as great an opportunity to try out new things as you do at university. Having a go at being a journalist is just one of the many things you can try. Whether you want to interview your favourite comedians, write up match reports or reminisce about your gap year adventures, there’s room for everyone to have a go.

Style:

20th Feb, 1.15pm, White Bear

3. ‘I missed Freshers Fair so didn’t sign up to the mailing list. How do I do so now?’

Arts:

25th Feb, 1.15pm, Hawthorns

Music:

28th Feb, 8pm, Highbury Vaults

Each section has its own mailing list. To sign up, send an email to each section editor you want to hear from. Once you’re signed up, you will receive emails letting you know about meeting times, articles that need commissioning and much more.

Film & TV:

26th Feb, 1.15pm, White Bear

4. ‘I’m a keen photographer/illustrator/make up artist/model who wants to get involved. Can I?’

Sport:

19th Feb, 5.30pm, ASS library

Yes! Details of all section editors can be found on this page, but if you’re still not sure who to contact, email editor@ epigram.org.uk

Epigram

18.02.2013

Sports pass fallout: behind the story Continued from page 1. What happened? Bristol University’s Director of Sport, Exercise and Health, Simon Hinks, sent an email to captains of the university’s 20 Focus Sports Clubs - clubs eligible for additional funding to compete at the top level - asking them to speak and vote against an attempt at AMM to make sport open to more students.

“

Hinks shows elitist values contrary to the uni’s slogan of sport ‘open to everyone’

”

What’s the status quo?

Following a 1500-strong petition, SEH agreed to reinstate the pay as you go option for the sports hall and pool at off-peak times (before 3.30pm). Many members of sports clubs would like this to be extended to include outdoor facilities such as those in Coombe Dingle. They claim that the need to purchase a (£250) sports pass to even train once with a sports club is putting off many potential members. SEH claim that pay as you go

was only brought pack for casual users – not members of sports clubs – but captains say that this was not said at the time and are dismayed at members without a sports pass being denied entry to facilities.

What they said: the key players? Joe Hawksworth – Secretary, Bristol Uni Underwater Club and founder of the petition ‘Hinks has no place lobbying student opinion and his surreptitious removal of PAYG demonstrates elitist values which are completely contrary to the university’s slogan of sport “open to everyone”’. Simon Hinks – Director, Sport, Exercise and Health ‘The University is in continual dialogue with UBU and as such all issues raised at the student AMM will be raised and discussed at our next meeting.’

ball before, to cough up nearly £300 at the very start of term before they have even played a competitive game.’ Liam Holden - Captain, University of Bristol Korfball ‘We regularly get people emailing us saying that they’d like to come along and try it out to see if they enjoy it. But we had to tell them that they could only come along if they had a sports pass.’

What happens next? A meeting was held on Wednesday February 13th between Hinks, Pollak and the university’s Deputy Registrar, Lynn Robinson. Pollak told Epigram ‘UBU feels that there hasn’t been consistency so far with regards to the decisions on pay as you go and will continue to lobby and pressure the university [and SEH] on this issue.’

• A reduction of fees and improvement of conditions at Hiatt Baker. Motion PASSED: 85% FOR, 10% AGAINST, 5% ABSTAINED.

Katie Abbott – Captain, University of Bristol Women’s Rugby ‘I have to ask these girls, many who have never caught a rugby

lights (which are far more distracting than a steady beam) from the site do not provide the conditions needed to study for my degree as I’m sure you’ll agree.’ Hiatt Baker’s Warden, Gordon Trevett, has said that all at Hiatt

“ We have to put up with this when we will never benifit from the results.

”

Baker are ‘deeply concerned’ about the current construction work. ‘The speed at which it is being progressed is both a good and an annoying thing. The good means that it will be over as soon as possible. The annoying part means that the noise and various disruptions have to be

Try? Women’s Rugby keen for pay as you go option so more can see if they would like to get involved

AMM motion highlights:

Hannah Pollak – Vice President Sport & Health, UBU (University of Bristol Union) ‘[UBU is] disappointed by actions of SEH considering that UBU and SEH have been working collaboratively on a number of projects over the last year’.

• Pay as you go sports pass.

AMM motion to cut fees for Hiatt Baker students passed Continued from page 1. Hiatt Baker JCR President Dom Walker told Epigram that compensation is ‘totally necessary’. He cited the long hours of noise disruption and lack of privacy as two major causes of irritation. According to Walker, in some parts of Hiatt Baker construction work is taking place ‘as close as one metre from bedroom windows’. Joey Eccles, a Hiatt Baker resident who also wrote to the university to complain, said ‘I think it is unreasonable for us to live in these conditions, paying nearly £6,000 for limited facilities and disrupted hall life. We also have to put up with this when we will never be able to benefit from the final results.’ ‘What was once a nice view from my window of a grassy area and some tall trees, is now a muddy wasteland littered with industrial machinery. The constant noise, vibrations and rotating yellow warning

UBWRFC

Zaki Dogliani Deputy News Editor

endured until all the foundation work is done and the noisiest part will hopefully be over soon.’ He said that all the windows facing the site have been double glazed to try to reduce noise and that special curtains are now being installed in rooms to help with privacy. Trevett is also in the process of forming a Residents Committee consisting of 12 students who will meet each week with contractors Vinci ‘to ensure the best interests of our residents are looked after’. He added ‘We have had a wonderful relationship with our residents this year and every effort will be made to ensure that continues.’ The current building works should enable the university to cover the anticipated shortfall of rooms for 2014 – needed to house an increasing student body - and to allow for the university to continue to be able to provide guaranteed accommodation for certain categories of students.

Motion PASSED: 88% FOR, 4% AGAINST, 8% ABSTAINED.

• Oppose and ban arms companies at UBU events. Motion FAILED: 34% FOR, 53% AGAINST, 13% ABSTAINED.

• Electronic submission for all work. Motion PASSED : 86% FOR, 9% AGAINST, 4% ABSTAINED.

• Sell discounted broadsheets on campus. Motion PASSED: 92% FOR, 3% AGAINST, 4% ABSTAINED.

• Support Inanimate Carbon Rod for NUS President. Motion FAILED: 25% FOR, 64% AGAINST, 11% ABSTAINED.

• Meat free Mondays - no meat sold on campus on Mondays. Motion PASSED: 50% FOR, 43% AGAINST, 7% ABSTAINED. A full list is available at www.epigram.org.uk

Epigram

18.02.2013

Students and staff battle it out in the Lions’ Den Social Enterprise Soc

Ollie Grant News Reporter

Tony Hay & John Cairns

Staff and students from the University of Bristol entered the ‘Lions’ Den’, as they pitched their ethical business ideas and social projects to a panel of industry experts Currently in its second year, the competition was organised by the Bristol Social Enterprise Society and modelled on the BBC’s Dragon’s Den series. Last year’s winner Kester Ratcliff won the Lion’s Den for his idea ‘sexy curvy wood’, which involved joining local businesses and social enterprises to make curvy wooden flooring. Following the Lion’s Den slogan ‘Ideas with Pride’, seven teams were shortlisted to pitch their business ideas to the four ‘lions’ in the Wills Memorial Building on 31st January. This year the competition collaborated with the McKinsey Venture Academy – a global management consultancy company that has launched social enterprise competitions for students across the UK and Ireland. Prior to the event, people disguised themselves as lions - wearing costumes and face paint – and danced around the university buildings to the Lion King soundtrack to help

Charity gig at CHH for #WillPower

Lions paraded around the university precinct to promote the social enterprise competition

promote the competition. Each team had five minutes to pitch their ideas followed by 10 minutes of intense questioning from the judges and the audience. The £300 up for grabs went to Sophie McPhillips for the Recycle Right project. The prize money will go towards implementing the recycling app.

The winners of the ‘Try It’ awards were also announced. The ‘Try It’ award is a scheme by the University of Bristol offering £30,000 of university grants to projects set up by students and staff. The winners were Rhian Addison, Rose Codner, Elena Hensinger, Martin Hurcombe, Stefania Imperia, Andrew Jack, Konstantinos Karachalios,

Sophie McPhillips, Matt Montgomery, Will Pritchard, Luke Purdye, Oliver Simon and Dominique Tan. The McKinsey Venture Academy is also holding a Social Enterprise competition, more details of which can be found at: www.ventureacademy.mckinsey. com/competition

Olivia Lace-Evans News Reporter The #WillPower campaign is holding a charity concert at Clifton Hill House to celebrate the recovery of Will Pope and to continue raising awareness for organ donation. Will Pope, a University of Bristol student, underwent a life-saving heart transplant on New Year’s Eve. Will had been on the urgent transplant list since September and his parents were told before Christmas that without a transplant he may have only had weeks to live. According to his family, Will’s condition has improved markedly in recent weeks. Meg Pope, Will’s cousin and organiser of the concert, told Epigram ‘He’s even had his first solid meal in months - his Dad said this was a huge step as he loves his food!’ The concert will take place on Friday 15th March from 7pm-1am and will host a number of music and comedy performances. Acts include The Club 3 Jazz Band, comedy from the Bristol Revunions, The Boy Royals, Sid Sagar, The Zeekats and Mary Spender. ‘All of the acts are people who know Will, so everyone’s really excited about putting on a great show for him,’ said Meg Pope. ‘Throughout Will’s time in

hospital there’s been so little that any of us could actually do to help, but by hosting the gig to raise awareness of the importance of organ donation we can spread the word about why people should sign up.’ ‘Will was very lucky to get his transplant when he did, and if we can encourage more people to sign the register then hopefully those in a similar situation won’t have to wait so long in the future,’ she said. Tickets cost £5 and all money raised will go towards Will’s Fund. The fund was set up to support Royal Brompton and Harefield Hospital, the largest heart and lung specialist in the UK, where Will was treated. The #WillPower campaign has already accumulated 45,000 site views, 5,000 Facebook likes and 2,000 followers on Twitter. High profile figures such as Stephen Fry and ITV’s Alistair Stewart have also supported the cause by tweeting information about the campaign. ‘He’s well enough to read all of his Facebook messages and emails now, so keep sending your words of support - it all helps,’ said Meg Pope. Currently, one in five people awaiting heart transplants die due to the UK shortage of organ donors To sign up to the Organ Donor Register log onto www.organdonation.nhs.uk. To follow Will’s progress visit willpope.co.uk. or follow him on Twitter @PopePower.

Chinese Ambassador visits Bristol Uni The Chinese ambassador to the United Kingdom, Liu Xiaoming, visited the University of Bristol on 7th February after an invitation from the University’s Vice-Chancellor, Eric Thomas. As part of his visit, Liu gave a speech commending the university for its long history of outstanding achievements and suggested that the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) - a university globally renowned for its scientific research- should be described as the ‘American Bristol’. Liu also met with a group of Chinese students who currently study at Bristol. In a speech entitled, ‘A Brighter Future for UK-China Educational Co-operation’, addressed to academics and students at the Royal Fort House - Liu touched upon many topics; ranging from the differing types of education to British-Chinese relations. During the 40-minute speech the Ambassador outlined his respect for the University of Bristol - comparing it to American university the MIT . ‘When talking about higher

education, people tend to compare British universities with their American cousins. For example America has the Ivy League while Britain has the Russell Group. ‘I was told that Bristol was regarded as the ‘British MIT’. For me this was proved true in my talk with Vice Chancellor Thomas today. I have learned that Bristol produced 11 Nobel Prize winners. Eight of them

Over 120,000 Chinese students study in the UK won this honour for their exceptional scientific research. Given your long history and outstanding achievements perhaps I should say that MIT is ‘American Bristol!’’ Liu said. The Ambassador was asked several questions by staff and students, often responding in good humour. One question from a Bristol academic prompted the Ambassador to seek an answer from one his colleagues, joking that it was the first time he had been asked a question so difficult that he had to ask someone else.

In the speech, Liu revealed that China was increasingly becoming an attractive destination for international students, with 4250 Brits choosing to go there to study in 2012 - an increase of over 20% on the previous year. However, the importance of Chinese students to the British higher educational system was also emphasised, as over 120,000 students from the country are pursuing degree courses in the UK. In Bristol, there are over 2000 students from China, of which approximately 1200 are studying at the University of Bristol and the rest at UWE, a fact that the Ambassador humorously admitted to being confused by. Concluding his speech, Ambassador Liu said that, ‘as long as we make continuous efforts together, [the UK and China] will unlock our potential’, and thanked eminent British universities for promoting more mutual understanding. Vice-Chancellor Eric Thomas thanked the Ambassador for his visit, speaking of the ‘great honour’ to host him he expressed his desire for BritishChinese relations to continue in the field of education.

Jon Hurst

Alex Bradbrook Senior News Reporter

Avril Baker

The Vice Chancellor Eric Thomas meets Chinese Ambassador to the United Kingdom, Liu Xiaoming

Epigram

18.02.2013

Syrian students supported ‘as moral duty’

now “lotsRight of banks

don’t want to deal with Syrian citizens.

”

from their families in Syria are facing further difficulties due to hyperinflation. ‘Earning in [Syria] and living off it here was difficult before, but now it’s even more difficult. Money is now worth about 50% less than it was before the crisis started,’ said Amir Taifour.* ‘I’m in an ok situation at the moment because my dad always invested money in the right way. Even though we are

in a lot of financial difficulty, we are stretched but we aren’t bust,’ he said. The letter to The Guardian, signed by members of several UK universities, said ‘we are doing all we can to help in this very difficult situation, including, where necessary, the deferral of fees to allow those affected to continue their study and provision of support through hardship funds.’ Despite Professor Lieven’s open pledge to support Syrian students, Taifour suggests that offers of help need to be made more clear to Syrian students, as pride will often stop them from seeking the help they need. ‘Me personally, I wouldn’t take hand-outs. I’ve got too much pride in me. The Syrians I know, unless they had nothing else they could do, would not come forward and ask for help.’ He believes that the impetus must come from the university first. His friend, who studies at Heriot-Watt University Edinburgh, received an email from his university showing their support and informing him of the help he would be eligible for. Taifour has not had received such a letter from Bristol.

There has been a call for the University of Bristol to clarify the support it can offer its Syrian students

‘Universities obviously know who needs help. They know who is Syrian and who’s not and to offer some sort of support, even a small email like that would kind of [remove the stigma]. They have to offer something first for people to feel they can go and get help.’ Professor Nick Lieven told Epigram that the letter in The

Meeting highlights ongoing student-neighbour tensions Student Housing Special A recent meeting about student-neighbour relations has highlighted the rise in tensions between students and their local communities. The meeting, held by the Student-Community Liaison Neighbourhood Partnership for the Cotham and Redland areas, was attended by residents, local councillors and students. They discussed the increasingly tense relationships between students and their neighbours. Residents in Cotham and Redland, two of the most highly populated student areas, voiced concerns about the effect of certain students in these areas and the impact that a rise in student numbers will have. The university, landlords and letting agencies were all criticised for neglecting their responsibilities. UBU Vice President Community, Alice Peck, was present at the meeting and told Epigram ‘A lot of students living as good neighbours are often overshadowed by the instances where students might have

Richard Brown

Tom Phipps News Reporter

loud parties or might be noisy. That reputation may be held by a lot of residents because they have only really come into contact with students when it’s a bit more negative.’ The university and residents’ associations have piloted schemes such as welcome meals, leaflets and newsletters in areas with large amounts of students in an attempt to bring the two groups together. Peck, however, said that ‘These schemes are not enough. It’s not going to work if you just give out leaflets at the start of the year. You get about 100 pizza leaflets through your door too – you might not necessarily take notice of them.’ Bristol’s increasing student numbers has led to a rise in applications to turn houses into Houses of Multiple Occupation (HMO) for the purpose of letting to students. Peck added ‘There was a lot of anger at the increase in student numbers without increasing housing and accusations of the university being profitdriven and not thinking about its effect on existing students and local residents’ in already student-dominated areas like Cotham and Redland. Peck continued ‘The

Residents have voiced concerns over the rise in student numbers

university says that it is not responsible but perhaps the residents argue that they have a duty of care.’ It has also been suggested that landlords and letting agencies should play a bigger role in building community relations, as students take out only short term leases, and landlords would be able to provide a longer, more effective partnership with residents. ‘Landlords are completely unaccountable, as are letting agents. Students are often

moving into these houses – which are in really bad condition and probably wouldn’t be fit to let were it not for students – paying too much and then being left on their own for the year.’ Anthony Negus, Lib Dem councillor for Cotham, told Epigram ‘In some cases landlords are not being as responsible as they should be in law for their tenants’. He said the university needed to take more responsibility for accommodation after first year.

Guardian ‘reflects the feeling of many people in UK higher education that the well being of individuals should not be put at risk due to short term issues.’ ‘This is a national issue and has no more or less relevance at Bristol than anywhere else. In this particular case individuals from this country have

been long term supporters and recipients of UK higher education and it is clearly our moral duty to support them in their time of need. If higher education is a force for good, which it most assuredly has to be, then we have to stand by that.’ *This name has been changed.

Entries open for student film festival Izzy Obeng Online News Editor Submissions have opened for the first ever ‘Jump Cut: Bristol University’s Short Film Festival’. Due on May 12th, Jump Cut will showcase a range of innovative and exciting films from young filmmakers across the city. The student-led film festival, organised by the University of Bristol Filmmaking Society (UBFS), Studiospace Film and InHouse Media, will give students across the university - both novice and experienced filmmakers - a platform for having their work noticed. Whether a budding Scorsese or Spielberg, an environmentalist with the urge to spread the word, or just a creative student who loves a challenge, this is a great opportunity. Applications opened on February 11th to films of any genre. To get involved students will have to submit a short film of 10 minutes or less on anything they are interested in. All films will be judged according to their own merits, creativity and their quality, not according to the resources that the filmmakers have used. The focus is not on big-budget, glossy films but on originality and creativity so novice filmmakers are highly

encouraged to apply. The screening event will be held at the Watershed followed by an awards ceremony at a Bristol venue yet to be chosen. Young filmmakers from outside of the university aged 18-30 will also be allowed to enter.

is “notTheonfocus glossy

films but originality and creativity

”

The special guest panel will include a number of industry professionals and will be announced very soon. The event will also feature a special talk Misha Vertkin - winner of the BFI Best Fiction Winner and The Guardian’s ‘Top 5 to Watch’from Third Eye Productions. UBFS, Studiospace Film and InHouse Media members can approach their societies for access to equipment, technical support and to find other people to work with. Applications close on May 5th with the submission date for animated films on the 10th. To keep up to date or to find people to work with follow @ JumpCutFestival or facebook. com/jumpcutshortfilmfestival

Joseph Thomas

Professor Nick Lieven, Bristol’s Pro Vice-Chancellor, has declared his support for Syrian students who find themselves in financial difficulty as it is ‘clearly our moral duty to support them in their time of need’. The announcement, made in a letter published in The Guardian and signed by other prominent members of UK universities, comes after media reports alleged that Syrian students are being expelled by their UK universities to ‘face imminent deportation and death because they can no longer pay their fees’. The current crisis in Syria has left many students without the means to pay their course fees and living costs. For those who received government funding, it has all but dried up, and those who are privately funding their degrees have found that it is increasingly difficult for their families to get money out of Syria and into UK bank accounts. A first-year studying at Bristol, originally from Syria, told Epigram that he has seen firsthand the problems facing

Syrians who need to send money to family studying in the UK. ‘Right now a lot of banks don’t want to deal with Syrian citizens, because all assets in Syria are rendered worthless right now. [One UK bank] recently called up my dad and asked him to close his account, because they don’t want his money in their system. It’s tricky getting money out of the country.’ Students who rely on funding

Flickr: Gwenael Piaser

Jemma Buckley News Editor

Opportunity. It’s staring you in the face.

Undergraduate and Graduate Opportunities It’s February already, so there’s no time to lose. Apply now to make the most of your opportunities with PwC in 2013. Text ‘PwC Bristol’ to 60300* for a chance to win an iPad mini and get details of the events we’ll be attending at Bristol this month.

Epigram

18.02.2013

How grim is your house? As part of our student housing special Epigram asked you to share pictures of the worst offending student properties. Mould, damp, slugs, cracks - Bristol has it all. 1

6 1. Flatmates in the heart of Clifton Village in a flat costing over £400 a month had such a problem getting their landlord to sort out this mould problem that they contacted environmental health. ‘They came and investigated, then sent [our landlord] a letter saying he must do something about it and that they would be back to inspect! That seemed to do the trick

7 and he repainted, but it’s now growing back)’, a tenant told Epigram. 2. This mouldy wall has been getting slowly worse since tenants in Kinsgdown moved in last year. The landlord is yet to get to the bottom of the problem. 3. According to pest control, who treated this house for slugs, the problem has been exacerbated this

year by the very wet weather. 4. The landlord at this house told tenants that the alarming crack was the result of the housing being bombed during WWII and is not the sign of more serious subsidence. 5. Mould in this flat was painted over but has reportedly returned 6. A house in Clifton had a severe mould problem which has since,

8 thankfully, been painted over 7. Students in this house tried to stop slugs with a line of salt 8. ‘When we viewed the flat the wall looked fine but they said there was damp and they’d need to re-paper it which would be done as soon as the old tenants moved out. They then said the whole wall needed to be replastered and that there was a leak on the roof

which was causing the damp. They fixed it, but only after xmas. In between there were a lot of phone calls, emails and what seemed like hundreds of different builders who were trying to work out what the problem was!’, one tenant told Epigram. Do you live in a house from hell? Send in your pictures to housing@epigram.org.uk

Epigram 18.02.13

Features

Editor: Editor: Tristan Martin Nahema Marchal features@epigram.org.uk features@epigram.org.uk

Editor: Deputy Andrew White HelenaEditor: Blackstone

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Homeless in the United States of America Helena Blackstone Deputy Features Editor Student Housing Special On an all-American road trip this summer, I arrived in San Francisco, a city of bright lights, trendy hippies, shopping malls that sell jumbo jets and streets peopled by the homeless. A breed of homeless completely unlike any I had seen before. Walking through the wealthy gay district I received cheeky smiles from tramps with signs saying ‘I’m sexy and I’m homeless’, ‘Kisses for a $’, and my personal favourite, ‘My wife had a better lawyer’. These people weren’t apologetic for begging, didn’t seem hopeless, nor to have been living this way for long. Many of them were happy, even.

“ not so much a war on poverty, but a war on the poor

But then I hit downtown. Now the homeless I saw were more decrepit, and there was no sense that their lives might ever change. On closer inspection, I realised I was looking at an entire population of the mentally ill, with illnesses like I had never seen before - people babbling to themselves, crying, obsessively tapping every fourth paving stone, a man in a wheelchair which was older than me with a sticker on the back of it which said ‘Not to be removed from St. Francis Memorial Hospital’. A couple

lay down and embraced in the street; one of them had no arms. As I walked down an incredibly long straight street, a man, roughly in his 30s, had been loudly talking to himself beside me in what sounded, with its scatterings of trendy slang, like the voice of someone who used to have a whole bunch of friends. He turned around ahead of me and started screaming right at me. At first I was terrified, but then I realised he didn’t even see me. I stole round a corner and took a breather. Where was I? Apparently in a caricature of a mental asylum. Where had America gone? And how had this happened in the land of the free? I later discovered that what I had witnessed was in part due to America’s ‘deinstitutionalisation’ - a policy that began in 1955, of closing down longstay psychiatric hospitals, with the (unfulfilled) intention of treating people in community mental health services. The objective, as defined by President Carter’s Commission on Mental Health, was ‘to maintain the greatest degree of freedom, selfdetermination, autonomy, dignity, and integrity of body, mind, and spirit for the individual while he or she participates in treatment’. Instead, many severely ill schizophrenics, manic-depressives and others with major, incurable dysfunctions were discharged without ensuring that they had any long-term form of help. As a result, much of the severely mentally ill population has simply been relocated to the streets and jails, where ‘self-determination’ amounts to

Flickr: Paulandthedarkroom

Helena was expecting to ‘meet some gentle people with flowers in their hair’, but the streets of San Francisco told another story

a choice of soup kitchens, and any socalled ‘dignity’ or ‘integrity of body, mind and spirit’ is long gone ‘Mercy bookings’ by police trying to protect the mentally ill - vulnerable to abuse and rape on the streets - are also surprisingly common. A sheriff in Arizona admitted that police officers ‘will find something to charge the person with and bring her to jail.’ A jail official in West Virginia, after describing how the local state psychiatric hospital routinely

discharged severely disabled patients to the streets, said, ‘If the mental institutions will not hold them, I will.’ America seems to be conducting not so much a war on poverty as a war on the poor. New Orleans, for example, is known to do clean-up acts, in which police take all the homeless off the street and dump them in jail - an illconceived pretence which merely sweeps the problem under the rug. There seems to be a misguided attitude to these people - as though the country

believes it has no responsibilities. Homelessness is often considered as a problem of the 80s, since the media is now looking elsewhere, but the effects of deinstitutionalisation are still very apparent. Council housing does not exist in the way that we know it in the UK. Instead there are ‘the projects’ in some cities, often referred to as ‘the housing of last resort’ because of endemic problems of ostracisation and violence, and there are also homeless shelters, avoided by many who would rather be out on the streets because of the extreme violence, rape, theft and murder that haunt these places. For the disabled homeless there are highly unlikely ways to claim money, involving lawyers and large amounts of paperwork. Without benefits, mentally ill children are known to have been left out on the streets by parents who cannot care for them. With almost no safety net, these vulnerable people have fallen into an abyss out of which they can never climb. I thought about getting on a bus, before somebody noticed me as the odd (sane) one out, and after a brief moment considering whether the people on the street or on the bus looked the least distant from my level of reality, I hopped on. The bus driver, perhaps sensing my wide-eyed shock, began to speak about what I had witnessed, from his perspective: ‘I have seen the worst of what can happen to a man pass in front of my bus. If I had known what I would have seen I never would have taken this job.’ The strange man next to him nodded knowingly.

House-hunting: 10 things you should know As you embark on what may be your first student house hunt and face the prospect of falling into the hands of landlords and letting agencies, fear not – the Bristol Law Clinic is here to help! If after countless hours have been whiled away shortlisting housemates and finding houses within 50 yards of the nearest Bargain Booze, you’ve finally found the perfect place, the next stage could well be the most important in determining whether the 12 months of your tenancy will be ones to remember – for the right or wrong reasons! The start of your renting arrangements is the tenancy agreement. We all sign one. Few of us read them. Do this at your peril, as landlords can use the contract to avail themselves of potential tenant liability, and to limit their obligations to you. This is avoidable, as tenancy agreements can be altered. You would do well to follow the lead of a bright UoB student who, after noticing that partial re-plastering was required, demanded the estate agent add a clause to their contract guaranteeing that the

work would be done before moving in. Whilst this may not be necessary in all cases, there are undoubted advantages to examining the contract carefully and the University Accommodation Office is there to assist this process, explaining the implications of tenancy agreements and to answer any questions you may have. Here are 10 further things you should know before you start house hunting:

University of Bristol Accomodation Office

Harri Davies Features Writer Student Housing Special

Before you sign a tenancy agreement:

Your landlord’s obligations:

Ensure that your landlord has signed up to a Tenancy Deposit Scheme. This prevents him or her from wrongly withholding your deposit.

2) Don’t pay anything to the landlord before the tenancy agreement has been signed and witnessed between you and the landlord.

Keeping in repair the structure and exterior of the property, including drains, gutters and external pipes as well as installations for the supply of water, gas and electricity and for sanitation.

However, ensure that you notify the Council of this if letters demanding payment are sent to the property.

Shared Housing responsibility – guarantors of all joint tenants are liable for entire rent and damages for the property.

10)

5) Your landlord must provide you with

For more top tips attend our Housing Law presentation at Wills Hall (Monday 18th February at 7pm), open to all students seeking to secure private accommodation in Bristol.

Your landlord should provide you with a written warning of at least 24 hours before they enter the property to carry out legitimate maintenance checks and repairs.

an inventory, listing all the contents of a property and a record of the condition of the property. Check this immediately and take photographs.

A fixed-term tenancy will have consistent rent charge throughout. The landlord cannot change this without your approval. Your responsibilities as tenants:

Report all repairs, preferably in writing, to your landlord as soon as possible.

8) You do not have to pay council tax.

Putting the wheelie bin out and bringing it back in again; it is illegal to leave it on the street!

The Bristol Law Clinic is a free service run by Law students which provides information on legal matters to students and the community. They take on cases in the areas of housing/property, landlord-tenant disputes, neighbour/nuisance, employment and general contract/tort. If you would like legal advice, information on how to contact the Clinic can be found on their website: www. bristollawclinic.co.uk.

Epigram

18.02.13

‘This is why, this is why... this is why I squat!’ For our housing special, Epigram went to meet Bristol’s young squatters, for whom occupation is often a question of necessity.

Sunday – 5pm. The sun is setting over Stokes Croft, painting the For Ewan , a Bristol graduate who neighbourhood a subtle shade of pink, has been squatting for over three years and I’m walking towards a semi-derelict now, there is a misrepresentation in building whose facade is covered in the media of who squatters are: colourful graffiti. I knock on the door ‘Squatters are not a big organised twice before a smiling dreadlocked guy movement who are all doing the same comes out. His name is Lee. thing for the same reason’, he says. ‘Wanna cup of tea?’ he asks. It takes According to the National Union of a few seconds for my eyes to adjust Students, with rising house prices and to the darkness. The Magpie Squat fees many students are now turning has no electricity, but does have to squatting in direct response to running water unaffordable and a functioning accommodation. kitchen. ‘A v e r a g e The room is student rent price completely dark in Bristol is around There’s something £400 a month except for a fire, around which deeply cultural about at the moment, three Bristolians which is way more squatting. It comes than what it was and a woman from Hungary are down to loving the land when I was at uni gathered. Lee tells we live on . a couple of year me that the place ago. When I first has been inhabited started squatting, for six years and for me it wasn’t so welcomes people much a question from all walks of of necessity, but life. For Ryan, a now it’s actually resident at Magpie, harder for people ‘there’s something deeply cultural to afford rent’ Ewan tells Epigram. about squatting. The word makes it Rental costs aside, the act of sound so dirty but really, it comes down to loving the land we live on.’ squatting can also be explicitly political. At the heart of the question of property Squatting is a tradition with a and squatting indeed lies the famous long history in the UK. From Gerard Lockean proviso: in his labour theory Winstanley and The Diggers – a group of property, English philosopher John of Protestant agrarian communists Locke deemed that individuals do have who took over common land around a right to homestead common property Surrey and Kent in 1649 and claimed from nature, so long as they work on it, it as their rightful due by cultivating and only ‘where there is enough, and it – to post Second World War soldiers, as good, left in common for others’. for whom occupying empty buildings Joining this principle, many squatters was a matter of survival, vacant spaces argue that unused land should be have always been put back into use by considered common and therefore ordinary people. Tellingly, amidst yet remain available for appropriation. another housing crisis, the country The bulk of them clearly self-identify saw a major spate of this style of living as anarchist and strongly oppose in the 1960s and 1970s. the privatisation of land for the sole purpose of profit and individual gain. However, for many ‘squatting’ is an ‘Why should a few landlords who do

“

”

Ryan

Matt Stringberd

Martin Sharman

alien concept. If anything, it conjures up an image of tree hugging ecowarriors or angry anarchists with a poor sense of hygiene, seeking out an ‘alternative’ lifestyle by invading other people’s home. But is this so?

Andres Van Der Stouwe

Nahema Marchal Helena Blackstone Rosie Goodhart Features Editors Student Housing Special

On 21 April 2011, there was a riot in the Stokes Croft area of Bristol following a raid by police on a squat named ‘Telepathic Heights’

not use their properties own the most of it?’ asks Tom, a former student at Bristol who turned to squatting as a form of protest.

But it’s not all roses in the squatting jungle. The high proportion of squatters with mental health problems and dependency issues makes them easy targets for vilification. Besides, evictions are always around the corner and leaking roofs, power cuts, and precarious living conditions often make daily activities a struggle.

For Thea, a 23 year old charity fundraiser, people’s perception of squatting needs to change. ‘It is something that should be celebrated’ she says. When she first moved to the city, not being tied into a rent contract enabled her to volunteer full time. She was While the downs of only supposed to squatting have been very stay for a couple very up, the one thing I of weeks but got drawn into what will never remember it many describe as a as is boring ‘the Bristol vortex’. ‘I was dazzled by the support there is in the whole scene!’ she explains.

“

In April, 2011, a police raid on a squat known to locals as ‘Telepathic H e i g h t s ’ culminated in the violent Tesco riots amid allegations of heavy-handed tactics, and left Thea homeless for two weeks. ‘ All of the experiences I’ve had with squatting have involved being beaten up in some way, or been made to feel like you’re the scum of the earth… By squatting you’re living outside of all that is acceptable and you become a non-human to police officers’ recalls Ewan.

”

In some cases, occupiers are even beneficial to the community and to landowners themselves. By giving empty buildings a second life, they allow these spaces to become epi-centres of productive social networking and skill sharing. Such is the case of numerous unoccupied spaces in Bristol, which have been put to use for the purpose of art and have contributed to the emergence of co-ops, free shops and community centres. Last year, a group called Artspace Lifespace took over a huge complex of buildings by the Bridewell Old Fire Station and renamed it ‘The Island’. The owners have since been busy converting it into a community centre and alternative venue.

Ewan

Since September 1, 2012, squatting in residential property has become a criminal offense punishable by a maximum of six months of jail and a £5000 fine. ‘It’s a lot more stressful now, you never quite know when the police are going to decide that the building you’re in is in fact a residential property and arrest everyone’ says Ryan. Campaign groups and organisations such as SQUASH believe that the

current housing crisis - with more than 42,000 households officially classed as homeless and two million families on the council house waiting list - should be treated prior to that of squatting. A recent study carried out by Crisis, the national charity for homeless people, has indeed found that squatting is actually the most common response to homelessness - with around 40% of homeless people using squatting at some point. Opponents to the current criminalisation are afraid that it will expose the most vulnerable people in society to the law and leave many of these individuals with no choice but to sleep on the street. According to Empty Homes Agency, as of 2012 there are an estimated 710,000 empty homes across the UK, 259, 000 of which are long term empty - enough to accomodate 1.8 million people. The criminalisation of residential squatting has reignited the heated debate about squatters’ rights. Housing crisis notwithstanding, I cannot help but wonder whether the steadfastness of squatting communities around the country reveals something deeper about our current predicament. In the words of Charles Einsentein - author of Sacred Economics and prominent figure of the Occupy movement - perhaps our generation is simply facing the loss of what is really important: ‘the loss of community, the loss of connection, the loss of intimacy, the loss of meaning.’

Epigram

18.02.2013

Depraved or diseased? The case of paedophilia Ostracised by society, is it any wonder that paedophiles often do not have the confidence to come forward and seek help?

Stories of child abuse, such as the recent Jimmy Saville scandal, are repeatedly the cause of moral outrage both in the media and at home. In our society, paedophiles are pariahs, confronted by disgust and shunned from the public eye, even if they have not yet committed a crime. Indeed, for many, the very word ‘paedophilia’ evokes feelings of repulsion. Given that those who admit having a problem are ostracised in such a way, is it any wonder they often do not have the confidence to come forward and seek help? Non-criminal paedophilia has been forced underground, which only makes it harder to catch the actual offenders. The belief that this ‘condition’ is innate suggested by findings that paedophiles are much more likely to be left handed - is too easily dismissed. Society tends to cling to the hope that attraction to children is a learned behaviour that we will perhaps find a ‘cure’ for. Might that be in the same vein as that elusive ‘cure’ which was, at one stage, sought for homosexuality?

Vince Alongi

John Breitenbach Features Reporter

Professor Mirkin of the University of Missouri made a similar point in The Pattern of Sexual Politics: Feminism, Homosexuality and Paedophilia, arguing that the acceptance of paedophiles will come in much the same way as did the acceptance of homosexuals and women. Sexuality has been recognised as a set of preferences and it is possible that paedophilia will be seen as just

another of these, although with rather more difficult consequences. Passive rejection does not seem to be enough for our society. Rather, it appears that many believe paedophiles must be tormented and victimised. Perhaps there is some sort of hero complex at play, with protectors seeing themselves as the hand of righteousness triumphing over evil.

If you have never seen To Catch a Predator, a popular reality show on NBC in America, then be thankful. The idea is to expose would-be paedophiles by posing as children on chat rooms and invite them to meet up in person. Consider also the case of Jack McClellan, who admitted to being a ‘law-abiding paedophile’. Response to such an admission was unsurprising: McClellan received countless death threats before being forced into hiding. And the media only adds fuel to the fire. In 2000, The News of the World’s ‘Name and Shame’ campaign brought thousands of angry citizens onto the street. Unfortunately, threatening paedophiles is sometimes not enough. The lynching of child molesters is more common than one would hope. In 1997, a convicted child molester named Derek Leonard was dragged from his home in London and beaten near to death. Obviously, not all paedophiles are law-abiding, and society does need protection, but the stereotyping has to end. It is believed that as many as 1-2% of men are sexually attracted to children and Sarah Goode, a Honorary Research Fellow at the University of

Winchester, has found evidence that ‘one in five of all adult men are, to some degree, capable of being sexually aroused by children’. If George Orwell’s 1984 has taught us anything, it is surely that you can’t police people’s thoughts. However, research suggests that many men who have feelings of attraction to children often do not act upon them. In a recent article in the Guardian, Jon Henley highlighted that in 1976, the pressure group Liberty published a controversial report suggesting that consensual sexual activity between a child and an adult actually has no discernible negative effects. Michael Bailey, professor at Northwestern University, found similar results despite recognising how ‘disturbing’ they were. Ultimately, public opinion continues to equate paedophilia with the possibility of child molestation. However, paedophilia may well be less damaging than previously thought. If we are to protect our children and stop paedophiles from acting, it seems that we need a real societal change. Maybe society itself must change its perception of this misunderstood condition.

Kate Samuelson Deputy Film and TV Editor No citizens know the importance of culture more than the people of Belarus. Kevin Spacey, a key supporter of the Belarus Free Theatre Company, summed this up poignantly when, before a demonstration in 2011, he declared: ‘When you look at the history of our civilisation, whenever there has been protest or revolt or revolution, it is the artists; it is the playwrights, it is the poets, the actors, the intellectuals who are jailed and silenced. And why? Because even dictators know that it is the artists who can best speak to a nation’s hopes and dreams and future. So we march today for the artists.’ Belarus is by no means a free country. Its people can be jailed for saying

Francis Sadac

Belarus Free Theatre and the fight for expression

“ the people of

Belarus can be jailed just for saying ‘Long Live Belarus’

”

‘Long live Belarus’ in the Belarusian language. All public television is government owned under a president who has been ruling for nineteen consecutive years (in Belarus, there is no presidential term limit – a stark comparison to the USA’s two-term limit) and, throughout history, not a single election has been deemed fair or free by the West. Those of us from free countries cannot understand what it would be like to live somewhere where even declaring your loyalty to your

Belarus Free Theatre’s production of Being Harold Pinter came to Chicago and New York, wowing the American public with their message,

nation can lead to your arrest and imprisonment. ‘We do not recognise how lucky we are to stand out here and speak our minds’, Jude Law proclaimed, at the same demonstration, continuing, ‘It is therefore our responsibility to speak for those who can’t vocalise what is going on just two hours away. Cherish the responsibility of freedom of speech. Use it wisely because we are very lucky to have it’. Spacey and Law are just two of the principle supporters of the Belarus Free Theatre Company (other supporters

include Mick Jagger and Ian McKellen). Established in 2005, the theatre company was created as an artistic means to resist the authoritarian rule of president Alexander Lukashenka, whose statement in a recent (and rare) interview that what his country wants is ‘security, not freedom’, has led politicians to give him the menacing prefix of ‘Europe’s last dictator’. Unsurprisingly, Lukashenka is not happy with the Company. Performances have to be held in secret and at great risk; audience members

are texted the clandestine location of makeshift theatres, avoiding any dangerous publicity. Each play could be the Company’s last, and, as a positive consequence, the players always act as though it is their final performance. Almost every member of the Company has served time behind bars. As Debra Brunner, co-ordinator of Youth for Youth, a charity supporting impoverished Jewish communities in Polotsk, Northern Belarus, told me, ‘the Company have all been persecuted and tortured for speaking out against

the regime’, although adding, ‘the two times I saw the Belarus Free Theatre perform were both incredibly powerful and moving experiences’. Spacey also stated, ‘I don’t think I have ever sat in a nice comfortable theatre seat and read a programme where every single member of a theatre company has either been arrested or beaten or jailed or attempted to be silenced or lost their jobs because they have been a part of a peaceful process in their theatre’. On the 8th December last year, police raided a performance by the Belarus Free Theatre in Minsk. All audience members and actors were forced to provide information about their identities before the show could continue. The previous day, the police had told the theatre manager to prepare a list of the passport details of all the members of the Company, both actors and staff. These types of police investigations and interrogations are common and have become part of the Belarus Theatre Company’s routine. The Belarus Free Theatre is an inspiration, bringing hope and optimism to citizens who have known little but oppression. Their hard work and bravery demonstrates that no matter how hard a dictatorship may try, artistic and cultural freedom is something that can never be destroyed. As Spacey powerfully states, ‘They can ban as many films as they want but they will never be able to ban the Belarus’ people’s right to fight for their freedom and their voices to be heard’.

For more information, please visit www.belarusfreetheatre.com

Epigram

Comment

Editor: Joe Kavanagh

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18.02.2013

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Do letting agencies get away with murder? Yes No

“ At best, student letting agencies blur the boundaries between right and wrong. At worst, they are downright unscrupulous.

“

Personal issues cannot detract from one simple fact: estate agents are a necessity for students today. Insight of an Intern

second year historian at Bristol, conceded that his letting agent ‘is pretty good when things get broken… It’s just that I was butt-naked when they decided to enter without knocking’. This epitomises what a lot of student letting agents are about. They do everything right on paper, but they often do it in a completely charmless, automatic fashion. Another area subject to debate is whether they are in fact necessary or not - at least this may have been an issue when the concept of the ‘letting agent’ was first conceived. What matters n o w a d a y s , however, is that they have made themselves necessary after monopolising the market. A large proportion of student houses are advertised through agencies, often to the extent that private landlords appear dwarfed and hidden. They are a bit like hoovers and toilets; although we wouldn’t die without them, things would get a bit grim if they disappeared. At best, student letting agencies blur the boundaries between right and wrong. At worst, they are downright unscrupulous. Take ‘handling fees’; never should it be deemed right to charge students up to and over 33% of the deposit for printing off some paper, combining some pictures and stats into a catalogue, and providing a pen to sign a contract. Never should it be considered just for the total rent to equate to the price of a Georgian townhouse, as is the case for me. Sadly, it is very difficult for us to find an alternative. Although there are more considerate private landlords, they are hard to discover in the shadows of the agencies. Ideally, letting agencies should welcome you - the valued customer - with a mug of tea and a smile before sitting you down in a comfy armchair to talk business. Both parties know, however tacitly, that the agencies have our gonads in their hands, and a bit of charm would help ease the pain. They are entitled to robotically fulfil their end of the deal, but it leaves a bitter taste in the mouth.

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I had my first experience with a letting agency in November last year, and I have only just recovered. Saying that, occasionally I wake up in the middle of the night, coated in cold sweat, my slumber disturbed by vivid, horrifying flashbacks. A sullen blonde curtly denies me a celebratory mince pie at the final signing; I carry around just under £3000 cash in some dodgy back alley near Cabot Circus because cards aren’t accepted - which is, quite frankly, ridiculous in this day and age. All this comes back to haunt me when I least expect it. Student letting agencies get away with murder, but the most painful part is that they usually do so in a completely lawful way. From a legal perspective, it is impossible to find fault in agencies. One of their main purposes is to help save clients’ time and energy when looking for a house. In this regard at least, they are successful. They provide a relatively centralised collection of houses and flats to rent, letting the prospective tenant glance at a single crudely photocopied booklet rather than having to ring up ten busy landlords. They can’t be criticised for having a limited selection either – I was shown eight houses for the relatively hard to find nine person house. They are punctual to arrive at house viewings, reliable at answering phones, efficient at paperwork and honest, at least from a judge’s perspective. Even when you’ve moved in they maintain their end of the deal - but this is also a doubleedged sword. It’s comforting to know that if your boiler breaks there will be a repair man within a couple of days. However, it is irritating when oppressive tenancy rules are enforced with vigour. For example, ‘the dishwasher must not be run before 8am and after 10pm’. A heavy handed approach may be appropriate to the guard of a Serbian gulag, but aside from the obvious clichés, students aren’t really that raucous. There are plenty of young professionals, couples, and even parents who occasionally have parties and accidentally break stuff too. It’s not as though students enjoy living in the squalor of a destroyed house more than anyone else. Arbitrary power is used to preemptively tackle a threat which will possibly never even surface. Archie Philpotts, a

As the yearly housing rush props up letting agencies, Epigram asks: are they really necessary?

“

George Robb

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Rob McGowan Stuart As I write this I am still in the process of handing over $4000 worth of money to a letting agency. Considering this, it might appear that letting agencies are the bane of my life. In reality, however, letting agencies do what they’re supposed to do and do it well; they lease houses efficiently and effectively. Whilst George might complain that their approach is charmless and somewhat robotic, and trust me, I’ve met some estate agents that pay testimony to that, personal issues cannot detract from one simple fact: estate agents are a necessity for students today. Firstly, the process of buying a house is useful experience for a student growing apart from the comforts of his or her family home. For many of us, at least, leasing a house is really the first time that we have to organize a major part of our lives ourselves. Sure, you could say the same about applying to university, but UCAS and schools pretty much do all of the hard work for you. Getting your first house is by no means easy and we need to get used to the fact that this is a process that we’re going to have to go through at least several times in our lives - if the recession ends, that is. Estate agents can at least give some guidance as to what to do, but the supposedly unfriendly and impersonal approach they take with us is important in giving students some independence in learning how to organize their own affairs. If we leave university not knowing anything about signing a contract, or delving into the stipulations and tribulations of deposits, insurance and a million other things, then we’re a little bit screwed, to say the least. Simultaneously, whilst many complain about numerous rules and regulations laid down by estate agents and landlords that may appear excessive and even whimsical, it’s necessary to remember who they’re dealing with. We’re students. In a previous article, I wrote about how annoying we are as a group of individuals. Personally, if I were a landlord, I wouldn’t even lease a house to myself. Students are untidy. Students don’t think about the

neighbours. They drink alcohol and take drugs. Considering this, the only way for landlords to entrust a property with such a motley crew is to lay down enough rules to ensure that boundaries are not overstepped too often. Whilst many argue that deposits are too expensive, if you behave, then you get all of that money back. It’s a relatively simple incentive for sticking to the rules. Whilst George argues that estate agents can hold a monopoly of the market and consequently render private landlords ‘dwarfish’, it seems much more logical to have fewer companies control more houses, for many reasons. If a house is controlled by an estate agent, we can at least be assured that the landlord will be adhering to a code of ethics ensuring that the homeowner will not be scammed or ripped off. Estate agents can regulate the relationship between the landlord and the client, so we can rest assured, to a degree, that the company has the customer’s interests at heart. Furthermore, by bringing together a list of houses under several businesses as opposed to having them advertised independently by each landlord, they make the process of viewing and leasing a residence much simpler. As far as my experience extends, my fellow housemates found it relatively simple to view a rather considerable number of properties under one estate agent, as viewings could be easily organized all at once. Imagine having to call up each landlord individually to discuss viewings and technicalities. Even as an English student, with six hours a week, I don’t think I would have the time to do all of that. And I have a lot of time. Look at my Football Manager stats to prove it. Estate agents are never going to be popular with students, considering that they cover a process that’s expensive and wearisome. However unpopular they may be, however, it’s necessary to consider that they only make things easier and ensure that the client and homeowner get a fair deal in leasing their houses. Dealing with estate agents develops independence, so when - all being well - you’re given the keys to your mansion in 20 years, you can remember the man in an ill-fitting suit boring you to death about turning the heating off.

Epigram

18.02.2013

12 12

Regulation has flatlined: letting agents need to change

“ I wondered why the banks have got all the bad press. There is one conclusion: British banks have only recently become well known as the swindlers of society, but letting agents have been bastards for years.

“ have only recently become well known as the swindlers of society, letting agents have been bastards for years. I imagine many readers will have encountered some catastrophe supporting this claim. The landlord-letting agent pair has aligned its social standing with that of the medieval tax collector, traffic warden and boiler room telemarketer. How has the situation become so dire? The likely reason is that the industry is almost completely unregulated. Over half of the UK’s letting agents are totally self-regulated and selfgoverned. There are member

Southville Sunshine

organisations that aim to uphold a certain level of integrity and service standards. However, there is no obligation to join these. The market is dominated by a helpless unassuming majority - the tenants- and a cut throat, profit hungry minority, the agents. Nowhere are the undesirable attributes of the letting industry more prevalent than in the student sector. The helpless majority are made ever more vulnerable by their lack of exposure to the ruthless domain of small print, inventory checks and irrationally priced ‘service fees’. The profit-hungry minority are spurred on by the ignorance, of their prey often combined with the financial backing of a generous parent. Who can blame them? In a world dominated by the bottom line in an industry where one is legally accommodated to do whatever one wants, why not charge an extra few hundred pounds ‘administration’? Why not put off renovating? Why not add in another bedroom in the boiler room? Why not add fees for checking out, checking in, ‘decorating’ or guarding a deposit? After all, students are a relaxed nonchalant breed. They’re only staying 10 months, they’re not bothered. ‘They’re not bothered’. That is exactly the problem. Of course we are bothered but who’s going to chase up a couple of hundred pounds in court, when, if unsuccessful you could be left to foot an even larger bill? Who’s going to bother advising future tenants against using dishonest, dishonourable letting agents? With limited options someone will inevitably have to rent from them. The problem is, with many student

houses holding up to 10 people that ‘couple of hundred pounds’ is really nearer £1000. The reason there are limited options is because agencies have been allowed to run amok without opposition. Thousands of tenants have suffered injustice without being able to hold the culprits accountable. Bizarrely, despite the countless horror stories and their weakening reputations, letters are encouraged to use agencies over the private landlord. Promotions like ‘protect yourself, rent through an agency’ are splattered across the internet and high street. Unsurprisingly, most of these are letting agents advertising themselves. However, what happens when the letting agency you decide to go through owns the property you decide to rent? Tenants’ second port of call

“ The market is dominated by a helpless unassuming majority - the tenants - and a cut-throat, profit-hungry minority the agents.

“

Recently the predominant narrative in British media has been the condemnation of irresponsible, lousy city ‘fat-cats’. A robust feeling of exploitation and dishonesty permeates the British public. The infamous banks have exploited the taxpayer, the markets and even each other. However, there are countless industries in our economy that exploit the consumer. Reflecting the almost satanic avarice of the banking world is the irreverent letting agency. After experiencing financial and emotional devastation at the hands of one of these and hearing similar tales of anguish from countless friends, I wondered why the banks got all the bad press. The sole conclusion; British banks

when they feel mistreated is the very organisation mistreating them in the first place. This fiasco is especially pertinent in the student sector. Three reallife horror stories – all from Bristol students’ accounts - will demonstrate this problem: (Due to legal reasons, Epigram is unable to publish the name of the agencies in question. Pseudonyms have also been used.) Case 1 - In the Christmas holiday of 2010 the pipes in Antonia Richards’ house burst. The result was a collapsed ceiling in a top bedroom and a flooded basement. As the house was unmanned for the Christmas break the leak wasn’t discovered for several days. As a result a large proportion of the tenants’ belongings were damaged beyond repair. The agency landlord gave the residents 10 days’ notice to move all of their belongings out and find another house. The property was declared uninhabitable. No compensation or alternative housing was provided. The residents had to pay all electricity and water bills up until May whilst the house was renovated and the postdated rent cheques were only returned after considerable pressure and legal action was taken. All this occurred while the landlord remained out of contact, rarely replying to emails and constantly claiming to be out of the country. Case 2 - Around December 2011 John Capstrick noticed his bedroom ceiling contained potentially harmful levels of mould. The agency was called to the house with a Bristol City council member. The city council member told the tenants that the mould was a

result of excess condensation and that they were to blame. Therefore the agency was not liable for any of the damage. Doubting this decision, a second council member was called who found the mould was actually due to a leak in the roof. This was an unsurprising development considering the ceiling now had mushroom growing out of it. The agency eventually sent the roofers back to the house claiming the initial inspection of the house (pre move) had found no leaks the roof. However, when questioned by the tenants, the roofer remembered reporting a leak after a previous visit to the house. Bristol’s largest student letting agency pleaded ignorance and, since the problem was sorted, the tenants took no further action. Case 3 - Francine Black’s student house was reportedly riddled with problems between 2011-2012. Their central heating was so inadequate that at one point the house thermometer showed 7°C with the boiler on its highest setting. A bedroom wall collapsed, which could have caused serious injury. Thankfully no one was present. Rodents infested the house, the removal of which Francine and her friends were forced to pay for, despite the cause of the problem being an unfixed grate at the front of the house. Three bedrooms had leaking ceilings and there was a period of five days where there was no hot water. All of these ordeals were followed up with ‘deep cleaning’ bill in excess of £1000 which took less than a day to complete plus another £1000 for re-paints and removals. However, it was not so much the problems with the house that Francine and her

“ Until a solid and regulatory body is put in place, students and the public will continue to be swindled out of deposit money and cornered with unreasonable fees.

“

Stuart Macdonald

friends objected to, it was the way they were dealt with. When they sent for plumbers to fix the heating they were told the tepid radiator temperatures ‘were the best they could expect’. When they finally realised this was an inadequate response and tried to claim compensation for the added electricity bills and discomfort they were told ‘there was never any problem with the heating’. The fact they did not contact their letting agent again after they were told ‘it was the best they could expect’ meant as far as said agent was concerned the heating had never been a problem. When their neighbours reported a rodent problem, the students were led to believe that the neighbours would seek compensation from them, as they believed it was Francine and her friends’ fault. When they implored their landlord - who also owned the letting agent - to consider the reason for the infestation and reimburse the cost of removal, it was bluntly rejected. Finally, when they attempted to negotiate what they deemed totally unjust deposit claims they were left powerless with no bargaining chips or regulatory board to go to. The letting agents in these horrific accounts are by no means the only perpetrators. Yet until a solid and obligatory regulatory body is put in place, accounts like these will continue to crop up. Until students and the public are protected, they will continue to be swindled out of deposit money and cornered with unreasonable fees. Letting agents may argue that overzealous deposit collection and administration fees are necessary for them to maintain their profitability. I would argue that housing is more of a right than a privelage; matching tenants with houses should be more akin to a public service than a profiteering racquet.

Epigram

18.02.2013

13 13 13

Ferguson may need a little more substance to go with his style

“ As long as the mayor keeps the city’s mood as cheerful as his chinos, Bristol is likely to muddle through.

is infectious, and it has gone some way to sweeping the public along with it. In the eyes of many, Bristol’s future is bright indeed. But the mayor’s job has not been all fun and games for these last few months. The recession has continued to bite into the city’s back pocket, and Ferguson has had to face the reality of an office that is rapidly shrinking around him. The gaping hole in the city’s budget yawned wider from £28 million to more than £35 million as the government withdrew still more funding from the economic capital of the South-West, leaving the mayor with some ‘tough decisions’ to make. The consequences are necessarily unpleasant:

Ferguson has been forced to consider a rise in council tax of just under 2%, whilst he has had to face up to the reality of cutting 330 jobs in the council, a reduction that will undoubtedly have a negative knock-on for the wider city if it is not carefully managed. The mayor continues to put on a brave face, and may indeed be accused of sugar coating a sobering truth – the state of the city is likely to get at least a little worse before it gets a lot better. It is little surprise that Fergie has been fixing his sights on a glistening future rather than a grim present. Bristol’s ‘most prominent public servant” has relied, to an extent, on an inflated rhetoric that rings a little hollow – delineating a ‘holistic’ approach to change’ that somewhat papers over the cracks in the city’s micro-management. But the news is not all doom and gloom. As long as the mayor keeps the city’s mood as cheerful as his chinos, Bristol is likely to muddle through – perhaps even to the bigger and better things Fergie has so loudly championed. A stable plan for the future? Not by a long shot. But as long as the silver-tongued mayor keeps talking the talk, and throwing a little walk into the mix, Fergie time is likely to keep on ticking. Calls for the final whistle may reach fever-pitch before his office comes to its natural close, but Ferguson’s show-business may just put Bristol back in the black.

“

Are you happy with your house?

Rosslyn McNair I completely forgot about Valentine’s Day. It wasn’t until I walked through Clifton Down Shopping Centre and saw a three-foot-high box stuffed toy roses outside Thorntons that I remembered and felt momentarily irritated. Just as Scrooge walked around Victorian London kicking children at Christmas, so I walk around Bristol on Valentine’s Day stamping on daffodils and smearing boxes of Black Magic on pavements like milk chocolate excrement. I detest everything about Valentines and always have done, regardless of my own relationship status. It all started aged eight, when having both made and written a card for a boy in class I lost the courage to give it to him and so, in a move that in hindsight wasn’t the greatest, hid it in our television cabinet. My mother then promptly found it and through suppressed laughter sat me down to ask firstly, why I hadn’t given it to him, and secondly why I hadn’t double checked the spelling of Thomas. Apparently ‘Tomemash’ is not a close enough approximation. Ever since then I have associated Valentine’s Day with humiliation and rejection. Not only was I not plucky enough to give Tomemash his card but I was no longer allowed to write the ‘Happy Birthday’ on cards and was demoted to just signing my name at the bottom of a card my brother had written. Just in case I accidentally wished someone a ‘Haippie Burfthdae’. Childhood trauma aside. I maintain that Valentine’s Day

is humiliating for couples and singles alike. If you are single then it is a reminder that you’re behind in the biological game. Every single second that goes by your ovaries are shrivelling into teeny raisins of death and your swimmers are becoming sluggish, like a seagull trapped in an oil spill. Or at least that’s what the coy smiles of the hugging Forever Bears in the shop window of Clintons seem to taunt you with. Damn them, they’re only teddy bears but they’re already receiving more love from the opposite sex than you are. If you’re in a relationship then it is a randomly chosen day in order to fill the gaping consumer hole that is the middle of February and buck up the drooping PostChristmas Profits. Who says you’re beautiful on the inside? Apparently not St Valentine as Valentine’s Day has become a day in which the extent to which you love your partner is interpreted in direct correlation with how much you spend on them. But you’ve got to get it right, chocolate implies you have the creativity of the badly arranged bunch of flowers that you inevitably bought to accompany the caramelled cholesterol of the previous present. The fact is, when you’re in a relationship every day is Valentine’s Day. In a world where at its basest level, our sole purpose on this earth is to procreate, you are entitled to feel smug every day of the year that you manage to persuade someone to think you are special. And if Valentines Day is the one day of the year you treat your partner by begrudgingly buying a card with all the sentimental value of that vacuum cleaner you bought for Christmas, you need to seriously revaluate your relationship in the first place.

We asked Epigram readers what they felt about their student houses.

18% - No

This is how you responded.

82% - Yes

Get involved in the debates online:

www.epigram.org.uk

Flickr: jacob34

Sam Fishwick George Ferguson certainly seems to talk a good game. Bristol’s new mayor has only been on the job since last November, but the independent candidate has wasted little time in laying out his long term vision for the city. Indeed, Ferguson could hardly have set the bar higher. At the inaugural Canynges Society lecture last month, he announced his intention to put Bristol back on the map as ‘Britain’s best city – no less’. These are bold claims from the man in the bright red trousers, and the mayor’s selfconfessed ‘cavalier attitude’ has certainly turned a few heads. Fergie has encouraged architects to turn Bristol into a ‘laboratory for change’, whilst his ‘Magnificent Seven’ template for the city’s regeneration brims with hope for the mayor’s fiveyear mandate. The mayor has promised an urban alchemy, transforming the city from good to great. Whether he is able to live up to this promise is

a different matter entirely. On the face of it, the mayor’s glittering track record speaks not only for itself, but also says volumes for the potential of his impact on the city as a whole. The architect’s previous projects have included the successful regeneration of the dilapidated Wills Tobacco site in west Bristol started in 1998; a broken shell of a building that was repurposed, with the help of Ferguson’s direction and funding, to become the residential, recreational and instructive centre that now stands in its place. The Tobacco Factory, one of the finest performing arts venues in the city, has risen proudly from the ashes of the former wasteland under Fergie’s jurisdiction. The mayor’s ambitions for Bristol are, relatively, even more ambitious. Ferguson has given the greenlight to the construction of an all-purpose 12,000 seater arena to compete with venues in Cardiff and London, sketched out a comprehensive overhaul of the city’s transport network and, significantly, promised to fill in Bristol’s “missing mile” – the symbolic but stagnant ‘gateway to the city’ that stretches between Bristol Temple Meads and the S.S. Great Britain. On paper, the mayor’s plan’s for the next half-decade read like an exciting exercise in optimism: a seven point plan that includes ambitions to ‘get the city moving’, ‘get the city working’ and to ‘make the city great’. Ferguson’s enthusiasm

Why I’ve got no time for Valentine’s

Epigram

18.02.2013

Science & Tech

Editor: Mary Melville

Deputy Editor: Erik Müürsepp

scienceandtech@epigram.org.uk deputyscienceandtech@epigram.org.uk

Can attraction be bottled and bought? Science and Technology reporter Adam Scott looks at whether our pheromones could help get us a date next Valentine’s. ‘No Cologne, go home alone!’ Were you alone this Valentine’s Day? Maybe you should be taking the advice of the friendly man in the nightclub loos. No need to bother with fancy candlelit dinners or flowers and chocolate – could pheromone sprays be the way to woo the women and mesmerise the men? Pheromones are chemicals secreted from your body that trigger a social response in members of the same species

Pheromones may play a role in the initiation of sexual behaviour.

”

that externally receive the chemicals via the olfactory system. Such signalling occurs in most organisms, from amoebae to fish to primates. Mammals rely on social signals passed between individuals conveying information about sex, reproductive status, identity,ownership,competitive ability and health status. While chemical signals for many of these have become virtually redundant for humans, one bit of information has remained ever present – whether

ilovebutter

Alex Grant

“

someone is attracted to you or not. There are instances where single molecules can attract interest and promote ‘approach behaviour’, even from a distance. These molecules are detected by highly specific receptors located primarily behind the nasal septum, from which nerves project to the amygdala, known to be the seat of emotion in the brain – so it is no surprise that such chemicals can mess with people’s emotions. The organ also has links with the hypothalamus, an area of the brain that regulates the release of reproductive hormones required for breeding. Studying natural human pheromones empirically has proven difficult given the

inherent desire of humans to be clean and odourless, but research has been done. Studies demonstrate women are most sensitive to the musky odours men release when they’re most fertile and women will have less sex when their sensitivity to such muskiness is lowest. Research highlights various pheromones, in particular androstenone, which has been tested in different situations to establish its effects and is thought to be present in celery. One study found that people wearing surgical masks treated with androstenone rated pictures of people as ‘warmer’ and ‘more friendly’ than people wearing untreated masks. Another experiment found that androstenone was perceived as

more pleasant at a woman’s time of ovulation, which could be a signal to men that said woman would be more willingly involved in sexual interaction. In general, these studies suggest that pheromones may play a role in the initiation of sexual behaviour. There are number of contentious issues regarding pheromones, for example, how might they explain people having different ‘types’ – do people have a greater affinity to particular pheromones from certain people? We’re not all going around head-overheels in love with everyone, so clearly pheromones aren’t the complete cause of attraction. So how would someone create sprays full of such

New and bizarre household gadgets Mary Melvile, Science & Tech editor, looks at three exciting new household gadgets, as part of this week’s Epigram housing special. fresh using ultrasonic waves to ionize food particles on the dishes, converting the food into reusable compost for plants. So now you get clean plates and its eco friendly. This compost can then be put on that house plant you bought last week. Finally my personal favourite: the tiny hand held scanner. This canon P-150 scanner can be easily taken to the library and used for scanning references and other documents. It can be

The first products that could revolutionise your home are the LG smart control appliances. Imagine if everything could be controlled using one centralised controller and even controlled by your voice. By embedding its home appliances with chips, LG allows everything from washers to vacuum cleaners to be operated via smartphones. With a single tap, appliances and

phones can be joined and even work together. For instance, the LG vacuum cleaner has a video camera and doubles as a surveillance device. Next up is the Eco Cleaner. Many students will have watched that pile of dishes getting higher and higher. Without using regular dish detergents, the Eco Cleaner makes the plates bright and

USB powered off your laptop. It has a plug a n d s c a n f u n c t i o n making it easy to use, plus it won’t take up too much space in your already crowded room. It also saves those late night trips to the computer lab to scan in a transcript or certificate.

potent Lynx-effect chemicals? We first need to locate the pheromones. Whereas animals release pheromones from their skin, urine, faeces, and breath – which explains why dogs ‘mark their territory’ by urinating on lampposts – humans’

“

Do people have a greater affinity to particular pheromones from certain people?

”

main pheromone-producing organs are glands situated under the skin. These glands,

which develop during puberty, are located everywhere, but concentrate in 6 areas – armpits, nipples, pubic/genital regions, lips, eyelids, and outer ears. Pheromones are virtually undetectable, what we actually smell when we detect odours from these regions are bacterial breakdown products of the secretions. What happens next is highly disputed – if you simply bottled the emitted chemicals and sold it, wouldn’t that just be bottled BO? Not the most attractive of smells. This is why pheromone sprays are often viewed as scams. In covering up the adverse smell, companies could not include pheromones at all, marketing the product as an aphrodisiac when it’s just pleasant-smelling perfume. This could also explain the general consensus that such sprays don’t work. Despite the claims of advertisers, no pheromonal substance has ever been demonstrated to directly influence human behaviour, so if you were expecting to become a babe-magnet from using such products maybe think again and spare your money for the traditional methods of courting. Alternatively, if you still believe in the power of pheromones, maybe try an experiment yourself – eat tonnes of celery and don’t wash for months and see if that does the trick?

National Student Space Conference Bristol 2013

The UKSEDS National Student Space Conference 2013 will be hosted by Bristol CHAOS at the University of Bristol School of Physics on 23rd and 24th February 2013. UKSEDS is very pleased to be able to confirm a wide variety of speakers from all areas of the space sector both in the UK and overseas Full information can be found at ukseds. org/conference2013, and all enquiries should be addressed to conference@ ukseds.org

Epigram

18.02.2013

Trying to dine in style in outer space

“

Erik Müürsepp Deputy Editor

“ofOne tiny bit HobNob can

be the death of everyone on board

”

also brought on board, but these are consumed within the first few days, as they can’t be stored for any longer. Food is eaten off a meal tray that can be attached to the astronaut’s lap to prevent it from floating

”

Flickr: James Vaughan

When Yuri Gagarin climbed into his spacecraft in 1961, about to become the first man to enter outer space, he probably wasn’t too excited about the two tubes of pureed meat and a tube of chocolate sauce that were to be his meal on board. The space food industry has changed greatly since then and space agencies like NASA invest huge amounts to ensure the food on space missions is both practical and enjoyable. Space shuttles lack any form of refrigeration, so preventing spoilage of food at room temperature is one of the primary concerns of food preparation. Most of the food on board is freeze-dried, whereby water has been removed during processing - astronauts need to rehydrate the meal before consumption. Meat products are cooked before and then irradiated to completely sterilise them before packaging. Fresh fruit and vegetables are

the idea of every meal being sucked out of a tube is long outdated

off. Astronauts also have the luxury of using the same eating utensils as we do, so the idea of every meal being sucked out of a tube is long outdated. Spending long periods of time in little or no gravity has its effects on a human body and space food needs to accommodate this. An immediately noticeable effect is that the flavours of foods are weaker. This is because the smell of the food drifts away before reaching the astronaut’s nose, and also because weightlessness causes liquid in the body to rise up, giving people a persistently stuffed nose. As taste derives largely from the sense of smell, food ends up tasting a lot blander.

To compensate, the food is prepared to have stronger flavours and astronauts love all kinds of condiments, like hot sauces. Salt and pepper are also available, although both are suspended in liquid to prevent the tiny particles from floating off. Crumbs are another thing that need to be avoided at all costs in outer space. One tiny bit of Hobnob can be the death of everyone on board if it drifts into a crucial piece of machinery. This is why all crumb-forming food needs to be bite-sized. Having enough iron in our diet is crucial for maintaining sufficient levels of red blood cells. The iron in astronauts’ foods is purposefully lowered,

however, because the blood cell count goes down in space and excess iron in the body can cause other health problems. On the other hand, meals are fortified with calcium and vitamin D to promote healthy bones that don’t get enough exercise in a state of weightlessness. As we all know, food is arguably the best part of the holidays and astronauts aren’t deprived of the joys of stuffing their faces either. Christmas dinners usually feature turkey and American specialities like candied yams and cornbread dressing. On the International Space Station (ISS), with astronauts from many different countries, national holidays get celebrated by everyone

present. Russians feasting on Thanksgiving is just as common as Americans having a second Christmas in January when orthodox Russians celebrate the holiday. Even on regular days, sharing the food originating from different countries’ space agencies can spice up an otherwise relatively limited menu. For those of us who are tempted to try out an astronaut diet, but have no hope of ever being allowed onto a space mission, NASA is currently running a project in Hawaii that hopes to study how and when people become tired of a limited diet. The HI-SEAS simulation has six volunteers living in a simulated space

capsule for six months, only being able to communicate with the outside world electronically. They consume instant foods and also prepare their own meals from shelfstable ingredients, whilst filling out daily surveys about the food and how they’re feeling in general. This Big Brother-esque social experiment may seem fairly harsh on its participants, but NASA assures us that it is all to ensure tastier meals for future space explorers.

App of the week

MatchPint is a website and free iPhone app that tells you exactly what game is being shown in which pub, wherever you are – an invaluable tool for sports-mad students. Next time you want to watch some obscure football match that doesn’t seem to be on your television, just go MatchPint.

Depression and the science behind it Science reporter Anastasia Skamarauskas looks at the real meaning of the word depression. (SAD), a form of depression brought on by the winter months. It is thought to be triggered by the lack of sunlight in winter which stimulates certain hormones, causing symptoms of depression. Sufferers are advised to get outside as much as possible and to be active in winter to combat SAD. In terms of the science behind depression, there is still lots that needs to be figured out. It is thought that symptoms are related to a disruption of neurotransmitters in the brain, specifically serotonin, noradrenaline and dopamine, known to control mood. Changes in the different neurotransmitters can bring on different forms and severities of depression. Research into depression is very active as it is the most common mental illness, affecting around 10% of the UK each year.

There are factors known to increase the likelihood of being depressed in your lifetime. Depression can be triggered in response to major events, such as abuse, social isolation, losing a loved one or even moving house or job. It can be brought on by drugs, like beta blockers

“

depression is the most common mental illness, affecting around 10% of the UK

”

that help with heart failure and high blood pressure, or illegal drugs, with a third of drug abusers being affected. Illness can be a trigger, either as part of the ailment itself or as a reaction to it. A significant factor is thought to be genetics with a high risk of depression being hereditary, although

scientists have yet to explain the genetic link fully. However, people suffering from depression can overcome their condition, often with the help of counselling, support and anti-depressants; modern treatments can be very effective. Depression can be an ongoing battle and often people are put to one side because of the stigma attached. It doesn’t mean you are weak. Indeed, depression can affect anyone, including those we might think of as perfect. Gwyneth Paltrow suffered from post-natal depression, and Princess Diana was treated for depression. It is a medical condition that affects all different kinds of people and should be taken seriously. Chances are a family member or friend will be depressed at some stage in their life, but support can be the difference between recovery and relapse.

Flickr: Sofa-King

Depression is a word thrown around a lot today. When you ask if someone is okay, you can often hear, ‘yeah, just a bit depressed today.’ But like with so many medical terms, the meaning of the word has been lost. In order to be considered as clinically depressed, you must display a depressed mood for the majority of most days for at least two consecutive weeks. Other potential symptoms include: a lack of interest for nearly any activities, significant weight change, disrupted sleeping patterns, fatigue, feeling worthless and guilty without cause, lack of concentration, and repeated thoughts on death or suicide. It’s more serious than just a bad day once in a while. Another phrase we hear a lot is ‘winter blues’ and while it may seem trivial to some, it is a common way of describing Seasonal Affective Disorder

Epigram

18.02.2013

Letters

Editor: Lucy de Greeff letters@epigram.org.uk

AMM an unequal representation of the student body

weren’t very many people who went with a general interest in democracy and the running of the University. What’s the point in an AMM then? It has, in my opinion, represented a skewed proportion of the student body – those with an interest in sport, or

vegetarianism – and doesn’t account for a large majority of opinions. It caters for the specific, rather than the general. Further, wouldn’t online polls be a better way of getting a greater number of students in putting their views to the Union, rather than assigning an afternoon where not all of the motions even get read? In my opinion, the AMM seems like a token gesture to democracy, unequally representing the majority of the student body.

Polly Ashton 1st year English Literature

Have you got something to say? Get in touch and share your views:

letters@epigram.org.uk Tweets of the fortnight @burstradio Should submit a motion banning students calling UBU “ooboo” #IAMMHERE Burst Radio station

@UoBproblems I’m settling down to the biggest T-Bone steak I could find in celebration of Meat Free Mondays Bristol Uni problems

@UBTVstation To celebrate our 50,000 views, UBTV are hitting rewind to watch some of our most-viewed videos! The 2012 Freshers Ball: ... University of Bristol TV station

Somehow, Miranda found her way into e2’s ‘Room 101’ in the last issue of Epigram. And that’s not the only negative press she’s been receiving. I speak in reference to a particularly scathing attack on the comedian by Bryony Gordon for The Telegraph, titled ‘Is it me, or is Miranda not at all funny?’ I for one find Miranda hilarious, but it appears I may be in the minority on that one. Gordon writes in her article: ‘One of the great unsolved mysteries of our time must be the continued success of BBC One’s Miranda […] I cannot find her sitcom anything other than painful to watch’. I agree, it is painful to watch but only because my sides are splitting from chuckling so much. The self-titled show, starring and written by Miranda Hart, sees the 6ft 1” comedian repeatedly fall over, address the audience in comic asides and repeatedly make fun of herself. In addition to this, the show is sprinkled with a good pinch of comic blunders which, in any language or from any point of view, is humorous. Yet apparently this is not the case. Numerous newspaper and internet articles dispel any myth of Miranda being funny, and immediately questions why the show has been successful, citing her as simply not funny. What is worse is that comments from the public on these articles have been even more damning, with one man saying ‘Miranda is about as funny as diarrhoea’. Anyone that I approach this subject with immediately dismisses Miranda as ‘not funny’ and ‘too try-hard’. So it would appear that I am alone in my addiction to the show, but how can this be when the sit-com has been on our screens since 2009 and has recently moved to BBC One – the hallmark of success. I’ve searched far and wide but have still not found my fellow Miranda fans. People complain that Hart’s comedy is dull or has been done before. Within the show, there are many stereotypes such as the overbearing and slightly wacky mother who tries to marry off her daughter, the overly sexually liberated parent, or the main

character’s desperate attempts to find the love of their life. These stereotypes were used in Greek and Roman comedy such as Aristophanes’s The Wasps, where character types, schadenfreude and comic blunders made up a central part of the humour. This type of comedy was funny then and is still funny now thousands of years on. Hart recognises the slapstick quality of her show and comments ‘If people think slapstick’s uncool, I defy them, if they see someone falling over in the street, as long as they don’t hurt themselves, not to laugh. It’s a very odd person that doesn’t find that funny, I think’. Indeed, Hart’s show marks a change in comedy, it is a return to the feel-good, simple comedy of the 1970s and, in an age of cruel japes and offensive jokes, her humour is refreshing, innocent and charming. Hart is essentially like a big child (as are we all), poking fun at herself with a candid recognition of her flaws and brilliantly timed physical comedy. Miranda has an unguarded honesty that is at odds with the boasting of many egocentric male comedians. On Twitter, referring to her new series, Hart wrote ‘Series 3 starts tonight. First 2 episodes slightly slower establishing, than before. So bear with and stick with! Paranoid – me?’ It is not only the sheer humour of the show, but also Hart’s sensitivity and simplicity that is revitalising. It is refreshing to watch a comedian that does not constantly insult or rely upon sexual jokes. Yet there is also an inherent dislike of female comedians, with many insisting that female comedians altogether are never funny. Hart’s success on screen is remarkable considering the historical dominance of male comedians and the current gender imbalance on panel shows and this only adds to the reasons why she should be celebrated. It would seem that Miranda is like Marmite, but I for one love her comedy and squeal with laughter.

Olivia Ward

flickr: rogiro

‘I didn’t bother going’

‘It caters for the specific, rather than the general’

flickr: Jenn Bot

Despite seeing a few #IAMMHERE tweets on my Twitter feed, I didn’t bother going to the AMM. Nor did any of the people on my floor in halls, or anyone on my course that I know. Who did go? A select few people who voted on mass for ‘Meat free Mondays” ‘really?), and other die-hard groups who were just after getting one motion passed. From what I’ve heard, there

Epigram

Puzzles

brought to you by Lucy Eyers and Anna Griller

1 A castrated male is called 2 Of the superfamily a gelding Muroidea 3 Extinct subspecies include 4 Consumed in some Bali, Caspian and Javan East Asian countries 5 This animal’s foot is 6 This year’s animal! thought to bring good luck 9 A band with the same name had hits with “Come get some” and “Staring at the sun”

epAnagram Nina Matthews

Happy Chinese New Year! All answers are the 12-year cycle of animals in the Chinese zodiac!

17 13

Down

Across

7 Historically the symbol of the emperor of China 8 Produce about 2% of the world’s total annual milk supply

Crossword

10 Used to find truffles due to 12 Known as a bullock in foraging abilities and Australia, New Zealand and sense of smell India 11 First went to space June 14, 1949

Can you unscramble the following types of eggs?

EUIUYDNSSPN

EHACDOP

flickr: raghavvidya

OELSIDFOBT

Codeword

LEEVDIDL

IDECPLK

ITENLROENF

ELDDCDO

IDNTEBCE

Solve to find out this week’s puzzle theme! a

18.02.13

NB: Not all letters have been used

Picture puzzles which common

_/______,/_/_____/______, _/___H__I___/ phrases do 18 / 9 15 18 9 10 6, / 18 / 14 18 17 15 3 / 9 10 26 3 23 15, 18 / 11 15 23 25 18 6 4 23 18 22 / these puzzles represent? _ _ _ I _ _ / _ H I _ H / _ _ _ _ _ _ / _ _ _ _ _ _ ,_ / _ _ I _ _ I _ _ / _ _ / _ _ _ _ I _ _ _ _ I , 14 25 4 23 25 / 9 17 10 3 15 9 / 15 6 15 3 12 7,18 / 2 18 4 6 17 4 6 12 / 16 7 / 16 10 17 17 4 23 15 22 22 4, _ / _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ / _ _ _ _ / _ I _ _ _ _ _ ’ _ / “_ H _ / _ _ _ _ / _ _ _ _ _ _ _” must get here must get here 18 / 23 10 6 23 15 3 17 10 / 13 3 10 11 / 24 4 24 18 22 8 24’9 / “17 25 15 / 13 10 26 3 / 9 15 18 9 10 6 9” must get here

Quick quiz

Who does Ron Weasley date in Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince? Which sitcom character ran a hotel in Torquay with his wife Sybil? Which television series stars Felicity Kendal and Pam Ferris as gardening detectives? What is the name of the body that manufactures coins in the UK? What is the name of the yellow character in the board game Cluedo? According to South Park, what condition do people with red hair have? Who represented the UK and came 3rd in the 2002 Eurovision Song Contest with the song ‘Come Back’? What was the 8th studio album released by The Beatles? Which 2001 film stars Tom Cruise as a man disfigured following a car crash? What connects the answers to all of the previous questions?

GRASP 21+1 flickr: Sharon Drummond

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.

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CULTURE Do we really want to know what happens in Kavos? p31

Flickr: ambabheg

Arts Pick of the Fortnight

Music Pick of the Fortnight

Bristol Improv Present: An Unexpected Tale Bierkeller 20th-21st February £4-6 www.bierkellertheatre.com

Christopher Owens Thekla Thursday 28th February £12.50 www.theklabristol.co.uk

The prolific Bristol Improv stage their latest offering in the darkened surrounds of the Bierkeller. Promising to produce two fantasy stories that neither you or them have ever seen before, this is one event that may well live up to its title.

It seemed to come out of nowhere when Girls frontman Christopher Owens decided to end that venture last year, but he returned in January with his solo debut Lysandre, a charming meditation on thwarted love and the pitfalls of fame. Catch him at Thekla as he roadtests the melodic new material.

Film Pick of the Fortnight Cloud Atlas In cinemas 22nd February This is the most expensive independent film ever (although the idea of independence is far-removed from ‘indie’ film-making) with backing from Hugh Grant amongst others, and a stellar cast including Grant, Tom Hanks, Halle Berry and many other big names in a film of epic proportions and multiple story lines. Everything is connected between different times and different lives.

Epigram

18.02.2013

Arts

Editor: Rosemary Wagg

Deputy Editor: Rachel Schraer

arts@epigram.org.uk

deputyarts@epigram.org.uk

@EpigramArts

Marcos Raya

R.Harris

On being careful what you wish for... Christopher Ivins, a writer for Ad Absurdum, joins us to discuss eternity and hot chocolate ‘The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who have bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it’s being held.’Woody Allen, Without Feathers. I’m having coffee in a little cafe as the snow comes down outside, and the conversation of the couple at the next table is beginning to get a little heated. ‘I’m sorry, it’s hot chocolate,’ says the girl. ‘Hot chocolate happens to be the single greatest achievement of Western civilisation, and when I die, it will be hot chocolate I will miss the most.’ ‘But come on,’ her companion rejoined, ‘think of Shakespeare’s sonnets, Beethoven’s late quartets, sunset over the Sussex Downs - even,’ here his voice lowered, and he offered, hopefully, “the love of another?’ She paused, considering, then replied breezily, ‘Nonsense. Hot chocolate every time. Three a day. Forever.’ Deflated, he gazes out of the window, considering the cold hard ice that is beginning to form on the postbox outside. An afterlife, immortality, is a tempting thought for many of us. In part, the sting of death is that it deprives us of the goods of life, be they poetry, the pursuit of knowledge, or - well - more immediate pleasures. Of course throughout history most of the religions have attempted to meet this desire for continued bodily existence with their own brand of immortality, but it’s a striking fact that those faiths which promise us an eternity in heaven are rather shy on the details. Why? Because, it turns out, if you really think it through, this wonderful, eternal existence ends up not seeming so wonderful after all. In a famous thought experiment Bernard Williams invites us to imagine an afterlife that

would be pleasurable (‘The Makropulos Case: Reflections on the Tedium of Immortality’). He says it can’t be done. Furthermore, he says it’s impossible to conceive of an afterlife that would be even bearable, that would be anything less than torture. It seems to be a necessary fact of human experience that our desires, noble and sensual alike, are finite and exhaustible, and end in insufferable tedium. To anyone who sat through The Notebook this may not come as a surprise, but surely it’s possible to spend eternity quite happily pursuing our interests and pleasures - after all I often make a list of things that in all probability I will never get around to accomplishing. For instance: 1. understand the theory of special relativity. 2. Build a raft and sailing from Peru to French Polynesia 3. Learn to play the marimba. But all this shows us in fact is our inability to really apprehend what eternity means. We’re not talking about 1,000 years, or 100,000 years or a million or a billion years, this is eternity - the long haul. But supposing I do exhaust my interests, and after a millennium or two of my favourite books and music, of philosophy and sailing and Thai food, I find I can’t take any more - why don’t I just get some new interests? If I could turn in the old tastes for new ones, I could go on forever, surely? Now at present I have no interest whatsoever in Scandinavian crime fiction - I mean I’ve read a couple of books that were pressed onto me by friends, but they simply don’t appeal to me. But let’s say I find suddenly I can’t get enough of Stieg Larsson, and by the way what did I ever see in John Steinbeck? Well, I suppose I could, but the question is ‘would I want to? Many philosophers believe that the key to personal identity - what makes me me - is not the body or a soul, but personality - desires, and

convictions, and memories. So to be told today that in the afterlife you’ll still be around - but by the way you’ll be heavily into Kraftwerk, Tibetan ceramics, and The Girl Who Played With Fire, be careless of environmental conservation and have no memory of the time you saw The Libertines play The Rhythm Factory simply doesn’t appeal - he won’t be me. All of these thoughts I was loth to pass on to the couple at the next table, as they slid back their chairs to arrange various mufflers and wraps - for one thing they had some hefty boots on and I didn’t know how they would take it. The snowfall was now inches thick on the window ledge and the wind had picked up, throwing big flakes across the panes. To some, that death nips our pleasures and pursuits in the bud renders life absurd, without meaning or purpose; while for others the fact lends the experiences of fleeting mortal life a special savour. As a waitress approaches my table and asks if I’d like another drink, I see the girl’s mug in her hand - drained,

Ad Absurdum was set up in 2011 with a view to publishing philosophical works from staff and students at Bristol University. The editorial team members are all joint or single honour philosophy students from across the year groups. The magazine publishes philosophical articles of varying depth as well as interviews with staff and recent graduates. This year sees the inclusion of a section devoted to fiction, a move which has led to more submissions from the English Department. Next issue out 22nd of February, previous issues can be found at: http://bristolphilsoc. co.uk/ad-absurdum/

In Memoriam Why do we elegise? Arabella Noortman explores death and endings in literature

Faced with the theme of ‘Death and Endings’ I feared I might end up writing something morbid, dismal and depressing. I have, however, been struck during the process by how much beauty there is in the poignancy and finality of endings. Literature is testament to how immense poetic beauty is often borne out of acute anguish and those idiosyncratic, intermingled feelings that are associated with death: desolation, grief, reflection. ‘In Memoriam, A. H. H’ by Lord Alfred Tennyson is a paradigm example of how words can help achieve therapeutic consolation; how words imbue the ephemerality of life with a permanence that can forever resonate across the human landscape. The poem commemorates Arthur Hallam, Tennyson’s dear friend who died suddenly and prematurely at the age of 22. Tennyson was totally distraught and ‘In Memoriam’ tracks his personal journey from all-consuming grief to eventual reconciliation with the life that Arthur left behind.

“

We can never experience our own endings - only other people’s

”

Richard Harris Collection / Wellcome Images

The poem exhibits a curious circularity.Tennyson constantly moves from feelings of overwhelming grief towards detached contemplation, towards a resolute resolve about the necessity for life’s evolution, and then back to the insufferable pain of loss. At times it seems that Tennyson is refusing to let Hallam go, and whilst the coherence of the poem’s final, elegiac reconciliation is not completely clear, the vicissitudes of Tennyson’s emotion are characteristic of the human response to endings, since we can never experience our own, only other people’s. The words that Tennyson wrote were the manifestation of his thoughts. Once he wrote them, he signalled an end to their intangible, abstracted, cerebral nature. They became words on the page. In doing so, he signalled an end to his complete self, because speech requires one’s presence and words do not, and because ‘The death of the author is the birth of the reader’, and the words he left behind him represent only the poet’s self as mediated by the reader. The reader reads and interprets; the reader transposes their own thoughts and emotions onto the words and Tennyson’s grief is accessed and shared by the reader who understands it in terms of their own experiences. His poem may have been about dealing with the finality of the end; but the solitude of his grief, through the beauty of his poetry, will be forever re-experienced and imbued

Epigram

18.02.2013

Not-So-Spine-Tingling tales at The Tobacco Factory M. R. James’ Ghost Stories disappoint. Lloyd Parry’s one-man show

Nunkie Theatre Company

Given recent freezing temperatures and residual post-Christmas blues, the prospect of sipping mulled wine and listening to the Nunkie Theatre Company’s chilling one-man retelling of the famous ghost stories of Montague Rhodes James may seem the perfect antidote to a grey evening in early February. Ghost stories having been rather thin on the ground since the preadolescent days of pyjamas and midnight feasts at each others’ houses, my companion and I were looking forward to testing our backbone against the ‘spine-tingling tales’ of a legendary scaremonger. The venue of the Tobacco Factory’s new studio theatre The Brewery did not disappoint; located 150m down the street from the main Tobacco Factory building, the small, intimate Brewery remains mysteriously sealed off until minutes before the start of the show. Guests are invited to wait in the adjoining café/bar where mulled wine and cider, as well as more conventional drinks and snacks, are provided alongside a quirky, individual décor involving decorative flour sacks and long wooden benches. The feel is more ‘vintage after-hours’ than chic and sophisticated but the warm and friendly atmosphere, a glowing haven in the dark, industrial streets of the theatre’s location, is in keeping with the personality of its productions and popular with its patrons; there was hardly room to breathe amidst the jolly preshow chatter. The set - the slightly shabby interior of a gentleman’s sitting room - is convincing and detailed but, of course, not overly lavish. It manages to construct the sense of threadbare gentile that defines Lloyd Parry’s portrayal of the gentleman relating the stories to the audience. However cosy and comfortable it is characterised more by the warm glow cast by flickering candles than spooky shadows within which the antagonists of the tales may be lurking. Observing this, I concluded that such a

design offered a platform for luring the audience into a false sense of security, a sense that was to be thrillingly undermined by the unnerving experience that followed. I was, though, to be disappointed. Throughout the 90 minute performance - broken up by an interval - I experienced no eerie shivers, no hairs standing up on the back of my neck. The one incident which caused the members of the audience to jump in their seats, namely when Parry slammed the edge of his foot against the old treasure chest on the floor at his feet to demonstrate the sudden and inexplicable dropping of a padlock off a gate that featured in the second of the two ghost-stories told could be considered a cheap shot. The ‘one-man cast’ element of the production is probably the most unique and interesting

thing about it. It does, however, require a superb performance from that individual. It is necessary that Parry’s voice is able to draw us into the world of James’ stories, painting pictures of the events in order to make up for the absence of actors to physically enact them. Parry, in his portrayal of a brash and blustering but essentially well-meaning toff who, in relating stories that happened to friends and acquaintances, makes up in wide-eyed disbelief and high-pitched exclamations of incredulity for what he lacks in terms of real wisdom and experience, is absorbing and convincing. This, however, is the problem with his performance. In so effectively becoming a character that, for want of a better phrase, ‘really grinds our gears’, Parry succeeds only in infuriating and irritating his audience - or at least this audience member. In light of my long-held aversion to overly ‘actorly’ acting – the kind where spittle flies into the audience and the mouth of the actor performs a whole range of impressive calisthenics in order to convey a still greater range of carefully cultivated speech impediments – I feel obliged to point out that what disgruntles me may constitute perfectly good entertainment for those audience members with stronger constitutions. Upon reflection, it is also worth noting that, sat in the very front row of an extremely intimate theatre, I was the unwilling receptor of a great deal of the aforementioned ‘actorly spittle’. If you were to oblige yourself of a seat a little further back you might have a very different experience, unmarred by much of what turned me off to Parry’s performance. I will however, leave you with the words of the gentleman sitting next to me, spoken to his wife as he stood up to leave: he said ‘well, the stories may have been interesting and engaging but they were not scary at all’. I had to agree. It does not take a Master of Suspense to frighten an audience with a sudden loud noise and indeed there was little evidence that either M R James or Lloyd Parry could be accredited with such a title.

Is this the end of the script as we know it? Don’t Hate the Player: Impro King Steve Hartill thinks that there’s room for improvisation... Picture this: a world where nothing is written down, (including this? Who knows) where writers are ostracised and type-writers destroyed.Instead audiences are greeted by actors on stage making it all up. Imagine! Well, this might be the dark, dystopian future that improvised comedy and theatre represents. Might be. But for me, being introduced to improvisation at university was one of the best things that could have happened. Of course, joining Bristol Improv Society as a young and naïve fresher, I had no idea how big the art form really is, stretching far beyond what you might see on “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” I never cease to be amazed by the sheer scope of talent, all doing something so radically different and daring. Above all, this means no scripts. Nothing that is created on stage during improvisation is written down or composed beforehand: something which often causes a reaction of disbelief in people who see improvisation as “brave”. I don’t necessarily see it as any braver than any other form of performance: I’m terrified of letting someone see what I write down (why did I volunteer for this?) but improvisation is all about the group. Everyone who improvises together must be working together for the show to go

well. With a strong enough group, improvisation can create anything, from a fully improvised Jane Austen novel, to a completely spontaneous Shakespearean play. Given the almost apocalyptic tone of the title,

“

This kind of performance could be making scripts shake their staples out in fear

”

this kind of performance could be making scripts shake their staples out in fear: if improvisers don’t need them, you might question why anyone should. But improvisation isn’t about eliminating the competition. Creating our own Shakespearean inspired play, or our own improvised Film Noir (as Bristol Improv did last month), does not mean we believe our production to be better than the script. I’m not saying I could invent a better Hamlet off the top of my head (because that would be lying). Each entirely unique, never to be seen again production is created because

of the enjoyment improvisers have gotten from seeing the original creation: in fact, we enjoyed them so much, we wanted to create our own. The magic of improvised performances comes from a collaborative sense that the actors and the audience are in it together. The performers’ creation often comes from the ideas of the audience to begin with, and each line spoken is a new discovery for both the people on stage and the people watching it. And, of course, the exact combination of each element in a show will never be repeated, so it is always something entirely unique. I love the moments of apparent telepathy, when two improvisers create a perfect scene with no discussion or preparation, and the audience’s laughter is part amazement. I’d like to think creativity isn’t a “there can be only one” scenario. Instead, improvising is an alternative, not a challenge, to scripts. And it is only getting bigger, and better. Bristol Improv runs weekly workshops in the Students’ Union and hosts and performs at a fortnightly comedy night at the Hill called Hill-arity on the 1st and 3rd Sunday of every month. www.bristolimprovnetwork.com

Marcos Raya

proves more show-boating than terrifying for Annie Flynn’s tastes

Dispatches from Russia

Anastasia Reynolds bids farewell to Mother Russia I am back in the damp, windy UK, comfortably snuggled up in the kitchen at home, toes on the stove, cat on my knees, coffee just a little bit out of my reach. I’m only here two weeks – I’m going to the Czech Republic for Part Two of my year abroad soon – so it seems like a good time to say Goodbye Irkutsk, Hello Brno (oh and hi London and Bristol, nice to see you, got to go). I miss Irkutsk already, my blue town: summer blue, deep turquoisy skies, impossibly wide, the lazy, teal, moodier Angara, looping through the city, steam marking its path. I miss the winter blue: ice-white sky, dazzling sun, air sparkling with frost and duck-egg ice. The winter river is navy, imprisoned deep down below a thick layer of ice. In summer it smells of dust and honey, with occasional breezes carrying forest and lake scents – but not often, as Irkutsk is singularly windless, sheltered from the freezing steppes by the Altai and Saian mountains. In the winter, there are no smells, just cold air, encrusting your hair with frost and forming tiny icicles inside your nose.

I miss my blue town: “summer blue, deep

turquoisey skies, impossibly wide

”

It has extremes of heat and cold: I got angry, blistering sunburn in my first week, when it was nearly 30 degrees above zero; I got frostnip in December when it was 35 degrees below. The change is sudden: on the 9th of October it was warm and sunny; on the 10th there was snow cover. Everyone I met was lovely, almost without exception, yet at the same time very curious about me: Russians frequently (or so it seems to me) undervalue Russia. I see the beauty, the mystery, the exoticism, the contradiction in the Russian psyche – Russians see the mud, poverty, coldheartedness, a shameful thing to present to the outside world. There was a constant interrogation: why Russia? Why Siberia? Why are you interested in us? What have we got to offer? You should have learned Chinese instead. Our language is ugly, difficult, useless. I refuted it all countless times, reiterating my reasons: I love the language, its poetry and depth, I love the landscapes, I am fascinated by the country and its people. I left out the bit where I usually add that I would be quite happy to translate plug warning labels or furniture assembly instructions for the rest of my waking life. That is less romantic. Irkutsk is beautiful from the air: when my plane took off, we left eastwards, almost reaching Baikal and looping lazily back, over the dark forests and white snow, along the Angara and Irkut, over the sprawling city, still low enough for me to identify my house, my university, my beat. I will have to come back one day.

Epigram

18.02.2013

Arnos Vale is Bristol’s morbid claim to fame

George Dew takes a stroll through our Western attitudes to life and death in Bristol’s most beautiful and historic cemetery quiet haven against the rougher forces of nature. Key to any visit is paying homage to the chattri (Bengali tomb) of Raja Ram Mohan Roy, an Indian scholar and reformer who is considered by some to be the founder of modern India. Roy is also remembered with a statue placed outside the city council offices, illustrating the multitudes of different nationalities involved in Bristol’s past. This space has also allows one to reflect on the heavy toll of the World Wars and colonial wars on Bristol, with the ‘Soldier’s Plot’ offering a poignant reminder to the sacrifices made by those in the past for our present. Whilst one’s attention is often turned to the renowned and the well-known internments, 300,000 ordinary Bristolians are also buried within the leafy, Arcadian-esque grounds of Arnos Vale. Consequently, the cemetery radiates a feeling of utopia, where class, creed and colour are forgotten and the amazingness of human

Paris has Père Lachaise “and Montmartre and London has Highgate, but what about Bristol?

”

flickr: idle format

nature and our own mortality are emphasised. This is in keeping with the ideals of its architect, Charles Underwood. During the same period when non-Conformists were beginning to receive emancipation, in the form of the 1828 Sacramental Test Act, Underwood designed and built a Hellenic-style space in the form of the Spielman Centre for non-conformists to carry out their rites of memorial at a time when the dominant mode

of religious instruction was Anglicanism. In this respect, Arnos Vale is highly representative of Bristol’s non-conformist, forward-thinking attitudes which existed in the 1800s and continue to the present day. All of which leads me to question why people flock to these spaces of death and morbidity. Is it through a desire to also be remembered and accredited after their passing or simply to appreciate the raw artistic and sculptural value of

“

Cemeteries tend to be places of serenity and respect

”

the graveyard itself ? Whilst death is a topic which causes sadness and fear, cemeteries tend to be places of serenity and respect. They engender a realisation of our place in the world and our mortality, itself a recurrent theme in art. Death and art are to an extent intertwined. Religious, Christianised paintings and sculptures replete with references to martyrdoms and resurrections, such as Ruben’s Descent from the Cross or Carvaggio’s Beheading of Saint John the Baptist and the richly-decorated gisants of Bristol Cathedral are a few worthy examples. Likewise, modern digital media reinforces our need for death in the quotidian in order to remind us of how fragile our lives actually are; take for example any episode of Holby City and films, such as Contagion or Terms of Endearment. Is it surprising then, that people appreciate the artistic, yet morbid value of burial sites? I would argue no; though, we should most certainly take heed from our East Asian counterparts in respecting our ancestors, rather

Richard Harris Collection / Wellcome Images

Paris has Père Lachaise and Montmartre and London has Highgate, but what about Bristol? Whilst most tourists do not trek to Bristol for the cemeteries of the famous and infamous, Bristol does have its own claim to fame (cemetery-wise) with the Arnos Vale cemetery. Constructed in the Victorian era, Arnos Vale is not home to any of the pre-Renaissance Bristol elite, such as the bishops and knights who lie dormant in the Cathedral. Indeed, the accolades of many of those buried at Arnos Grove may be less evident than those of the superstars buried at Highgate, but many interesting personalities do now reside here. An Indian scholar, Quaker reformers, early fighters for women’s liberation, war heroes, industrialists and missionaries are amongst the great and good remembered at this place of reflection. For visitors and residences of Bristol, a visit to Arnos Vale’s 45-acre site is indispensable. Many of its memorials are currently in need of dire restoration and about to be granted the necessary TLC by £4.8 million lottery grant. Despite the crumbling monuments, it is a tranquil place very much at peace with the world around it – a

than simply marvelling at the wonder of marble tombstones and honorifics. If you are willing to look beyond the gloom and sadness and towards the pervading power of remembrance, a visit to Arnos Vale is as if one is visiting a utopia within the hustle and bustle of the city. Go and explore.

Feeling like death: A welcome hangover cure Rosemary Wagg ponders skeletons, momento mori and other first-date icebreakers in Richard Harris’ ‘Death’ collection

I reasoned with myself, the end is surely nigh for me and I would like to be prepared. The Wellcome Collection, situated on one of the most depressing – and also frequently stressful – stretches of London, Euston Road, is somewhere I had previously avoided going on the principle that it was For Scientists. An unfortunate

of death over a 12 year period. In the blurb to the exhibition he takes especial care to thank his – implied long-suffering – wife Barbara for indulging this odd passion. Personally, I don’t think he should worry too much about apologizing, as this is a sincerely brilliant collection to possess. After all, a few memento moris in the bedroom always spurs the lady into action. The exhibition, instead of mirroring my heavy head, actually quite cheered me up: the jiggling skeletons and grinning skulls; the promotional calendar featuring skeleton illustrations, which was produced by a medical company whose products were later found to be

“

I once had a successful date taking a guy to the taxiderny section of Bristol Museum and Gallery

”

Mondongo Collective

“The place is an absolute treasure trove of stuff ”

mother-influenced trip to the upper floor of the Science Museum, which houses a mini Wellcome collection, had assured me that the place was full of Victorian gynecological instruments that should be consigned to history and a dustbin. My Saturday morning visit usurped this prejudice entirely. I have, in fact, now decided that ‘The Wellcome Collection’ will be my luxury item request when (obviously not ‘if’) I one day appear on Desert Island Discs. As with the British Museum and the V&A, the place is an absolute treasure trove of Stuff. It is a mecca for people who always fly home with far more baggage than they left with or those who commonly find pieces of shell in the pockets of jackets last worn a year ago. The highlighted collection on at the moment, Death: A Self Portrait, is actually the personal collection of one man, Richard Harris, who collected together 1500 artworks and artefacts relating to the theme

Marcos Raya

This issue’s theme takes its cue, in part, from an current exhibition at London’s Wellcome Collection, ‘Death: A Self-portrait, The Richard Harris Collection’. When I was younger I prided myself on never giving in to a hangover. Indeed, I was well known for being the impressive idiot who went to four hour lectures after two hours sleep and three bottles of wine. I think I may also have spouted some ‘man-up’- type comments to other individuals who failed to demonstrate the same level of resolve as myself. And then the planets shifted. Now, after a joyful night I look and feel like something shrunken, bloated, mangled and diseased. Ladies and Gentlemen, my ‘super power’ of not getting hangovers has unceremoniously upped and left. And so, on one such morning a few weeks ago, I decided the fitting thing to do would be to go and see an exhibition named Death. After all,

toxic. I daydreamed of heady Brideshead parties when gazing on embossed skulls and thought of Alexander McQueen skull prints. Until I reached the room entitled Violent Death. Here, the room was dominated by 51 pictures by the artist Otto Dix named ‘Der Krieg’ (the war). Composed from Dix’s memories of fighting in the First World War, the images are of dirty, writhing, broken bodies. Tangled in heaps and sprawled across the pages, the images are as far away from a Mexican Day

of the Dead marigold as can be imagined. This is the kind of death that no hangover could ever touch and I think what their place in the collection states is that it is not the existence of death itself which is horrifying – sometimes knowing you are going to die can make you appreciate and live life more – but the disgusting man-made version of it. A trip to an exhibition about death may not be the sexiest of ideas. I can only counter that I once had a successful date taking a guy to the taxidermy section of Bristol Museum and Gallery. Next to dead things you’re sure to look just radiant (even with a hangover).

Epigram

Music

Editor: Eliot Brammer

Deputy Editor: Phil Gwyn

music@epigram.org.uk

deputymusic@epigram.org.uk

18.02.2013

@epigrammusic

Deacon preaching to the converted Ben Hickey meets experimentalist Dan Deacon to chat about challenging his audiences and his conceptual latest album. I’m sitting with Dan Deacon in the dressing room of The Fleece, practically bare except for a six-pack of Becks and two rickety chairs. This performance is his first date of 2013 and commences the European leg of a tour promoting last year’s release of America, Deacon’s eighth full-length. Tackling complex themes of culture and identity, America is his most ambitious and challenging effort to date, ‘a pretty beastly record to make’, while also retaining a sense of the visceral and primal when transposed to a live setting. As Deacon himself admits, ‘I try not to over-analyse things too much or else I’ll ruin them.’ Trying to explain the genre of

but, as he says in the interview, ‘I need some people not to want to get involved because that element of the show involves celebrating the people who didn’t do it.’ It comes across as a ritualistic and somewhat baptismal experience, a moment of conversion for the reticent and a celebration of communal acceptance in the context of a live show. His new album America wrestles with the disparate concept of American identity, brought on by experiences on his previous visits to Europe. ‘People identify with their heritage a lot more in America because it’s such a young country, saying ‘I’m an Irish-American’ or ‘I’m an Italian-American.’ So has the making of the record solidified his sense of American identity? ‘Yes. I can move to Dublin or Tokyo or Paris but I’ll still be American, that culture is embedded in me.’

Dan Deacon’s music can be a testing experience. The term most commonly coined is ‘electro-acoustic’, but what does this mean? ‘I didn’t really listen to a lot of electronic music growing up. I preferred the timbres and the sounds, the percussion, of live instruments. The percussion element of a band can really define what that band is. So I wanted the record to have that vibe of live music, an organic quality to it as well as a synthetic quality. It changes the way in which it’s ingested by the listener.’ The relationship between the organic and the synthetic is most apparent on stage; the presence of two drummers adding an almost tribal essence to Deacon’s heavily distorted vocal incantations. He

“

The live show isn’t fun unless there’s a chance that it will fail. If the Ravens won every game no-one would watch, if Spiderman won every battle noone would give a shit.

”

In particular, his music dwells on the relationship between the man-made and the natural, the organic and

seems keen to differentiate his electro-acoustic approach from the modern club scene: ‘I don’t even know what the hell dubstep is anymore.’ His approach to electronic music is definitely much more considered than the contemporary scene around him, emphasised by his repertoire of orchestral work (the Canadian Kitchener-Waterloo Symphony performed his first orchestral pieces back in 2011). When asked if this was an avenue he would be pursuing more frequently in the future he replies ‘I would like to do more, for sure. I still have an insane amount to learn and a lot of mistakes to make though. But I’m also getting into DJing as well…maybe I just don’t want

to be regimented into one world.’ However, by far the most distinctive element of Deacon’s live show is his interaction with the audience, often singling out individual members of the audience to lead bizarre interpretative dances. ‘In my mind, the audience is normally in a deficit of attention at a gig. It’s all about making a choice, when people go to a show; a lot of them expect it to be a very passive experience. They’re not going to be confronted with a choice; they’re not going to be put on the spot. It’s just like watching television. But I don’t put on that kind of show. I put on a show where at any moment you could be making a decision or a choice.’ He accepts that there is a risk

of spontaneity derailing the show but, as he says, ‘the live show isn’t fun unless there’s a chance that it will fail. If the [Baltimore] Ravens won every game no-one would watch, if Spiderman won every battle no-one would give a shit.’ The gig itself sees what he calls the ‘hive-mind mentality’ of the audience come to light. At one point, the audience finds themselves rotating in unison around a man holding an umbrella in the air, as Deacon sings ‘and oh, it rained, but the rain all turned to piss’. The effect is surreal but oddly affecting. The two people chosen to begin a human tunnel that eventually extends out into the street are somewhat reluctant participants

the synthetic. ‘Prettyboy [one of the track titles] is this beautiful, pristine reservoir just outside Baltimore and I also love Guildford Avenue Bridge [another track title] because it leads towards this warehouse area, and there’s human shit on the bridge and things like that, and I liked the idea of putting those two things next to each other. I knew that was the way to go.’ The America depicted by Deacon on the record is an idiosyncratic one, blending the melodic and the discordant in an attempt to break the mould of nondescript American identity. A subscriber to numerous conspiracy theories, he has found himself reflecting on ‘whether it is the case that the people running the game, the big corporations, made it so that you didn’t care where you came from.’ He finds comfort in the fact that ‘although there is this homogenised culture in America, individual

cultures like the Providence scene still remain’. It is Deacon’s seamless blending of opposites and his compulsion to push the envelope of electronic music that provides his greatest appeal. His live show also pivots on these same principles of contrast, commonality and risk, daring his audiences to step outside of their comfort zone. In concluding the interview I question him about the significance of music to youth culture. ‘Kids find themselves in college without things being laid out for them and they have to make a choice about what their interests really are. The have to find their own identity, especially in a culture where you can start drinking at eighteen. That influences the way in which you interact with nightlife. I mean, you could live every day as your last but it’s important not to fucking do that, not at the expense of the future.’ For

Dan Deacon, then, music is essential both in defining youth culture and in stabilising it. His innovative, nuanced approach encourages his audience not only to appreciate electronic music as a diverse genre of possibility but also to be pro-active in their assimilation of culture generally; to be unafraid of making a choice. America is out now on Domino.

Epigram

18.02.2013

26 It’s a Thursday evening in Bristol and it’s pouring with rain - the kind of huge droplets that pretty much wash your clothes for you. Gusts of wind blow me all the way down to The Louisiana, one of Bristol’s most venerable music venues with a cosy pub downstairs and an intimate gig space above. With posters displaying the impressive list of greats that have played there, the venue has a magical feeling like all places with a history; I can almost see Amy Winehouse sitting at the table in the corner, or The Strokes wandering past the bar. In fact it’s Søren Løkke Juul, otherwise known as Indians, who comes down the stairs to meet me, in lace up leather boots and a long black coat. I’m soon put to ease by a warm smile and a twinkle in his eye as we settle into conversation. Having played in various bands in Copenhagen for over 10 years, Søren has only recently emerged as a solo artist, having played his first gig as Indians in February of last year. Starting out with two tracks that began circulating around friends and quickly went viral, Søren’s music picked up a huge buzz, featuring in numerous music blogs before his signing with label 4AD. Having played in the background of bands all his life, this new project is a big change for him, and although he only wrote his first song, ‘Magic Kids’ in late 2011, he has singlehandedly written, recorded and produced his new album. ‘I’ve always been a curious person’, he says, ‘I like to travel around, explore different cities, different people’. Søren describes his transition to a solo artist as a necessary move to keep challenging himself. ‘I felt safe in the background of other bands. Singing and writing my own tracks is nerveracking and renews the excitement in what I do. I always knew I wanted to do something on my own - it was the perfect time to be ready for it.’ The majority

Indians storm Louisiana After the release of his magical debut album on 4AD in January, Georgia Rose caught up with Søren Løkke Juul on his visit to Bristol earlier this month to talk about going it alone. of Somewhere Else was written in the Danish countryside. ‘A lot of it is about playing around and being curious. As a keyboard player I used to always create the atmosphere under the music with soundscapes.’ Søren has taken this skill and expanded it into an album full of entrancing, phantasmagoric electronic music. ‘Music is fantasy’, he says, ‘you can create your own world.’ Somewhere Else, aptly named, is certainly otherworldly; the listener is transported by a multitude of rippling echoes, sustained notes and soaring vocals overlaid to create a textured and intricate effect. With 10 tracks on the album, Somewhere Else rewards being listened to as a complete sequence. The subtle complexity of the music reveals itself

after successive plays; the energy of the songs gently ebb and flow, running beautifully into one another. Influenced by nature, Søren uses the world outside as inspiration for his creations. ‘First I started by putting my desk so it was looking into a wall, and it didn’t work. So I put my desk in the middle of the room and I looked outside at the weather and the trees. There were a lot of emotions going on outside, but I wasn’t part of it - I had my own world. I had my headphones on but I could watch what was going on outside through the window and I could create my own fantasy.’ The album is intimate and personal, in particular the track ‘Melt’, a meditation on finding strength in

Rising to the challenge? HMV, an established feature of most high streets, is set to disappear from many of them imminently, after announcing the impending closure of 66 stores. This comes after huge changes in consumer preferences and habits in the music industry. Lawrence Montgomery, owner of independent record shop Rise, outlines the key issue for record stores as reacting to ‘diversification in the way people consume music’. He points out that the size of the CD market has shrunk by 50% in the last 5 years. ‘It’s a perfect storm. You’ve got people that illegally download, people who choose

iTunes, people who choose Spotify and you’ve got people that buy off Amazon.’ It’s a storm that HMV has failed to successfully weather. What then can independent record stores aim to do in order to remain robust in the face of a volatile market? ‘What a shop has to do is easier said than done; you’ve got to be relevant to the customer.’ Lawrence diagnoses one of the issues endemic to HMV’s failure; ‘HMV chased the middle-market, they needed to retain more individuality.’ Though a massive amount of sales will come from Adele CDs, X Factor

singles and the like, the inevitable fact remains that on pricing ‘Amazon will always undercut you.’ This wasn’t entirely ignored by HMV chiefs, they did diversify their product range and ‘seemed to chase this digital thing really aggressively; headphones and accessories’. But perhaps this approach wasn’t quite in line with consumer preferences, and seemingly not with Rise’s target demographic, ‘I think a record shop should almost be about antiquity. People will take their leisure time outside of the whole digital norm which is how everyone lives their lives

sorrowful situations. Each song is moving and engaging, and although personal, Søren manages to attach his interior emotions to larger meaning and create connections that engage his listeners. However, he tells me that he makes sure not to think about an audience as he writes. He explains that if you start thinking about who will like the track as you are recording or writing, it won’t be truthful, but becomes tainted by self consciousness. Every person feels different whenever they hear the same song, and it is impossible to place one audience on a track, ‘once it is out of you it is out of your hands - you cannot control how people feel.’ I ask about his inspirations and

now.’ Independent record stores occupy that space, integrated with but usually separate from the all-encompassing digital realm, but the disappearance of HMV from many high streets isn’t a sign that independent stores will crop up to replace them. ‘I’d be careful about saying you’re going to have a boom of independent record shops.’ Financing a record shop in this climate is difficult, first of all is the issue of obtaining stock, ‘we have to fight with our suppliers everyday to give us enough credit.’ Supplying to a record store is a risk on behalf the suppliers, something evident in the case of HMV, where suppliers were handed 5% equity and vastly increased the amount of stock provided on consignment terms. No one will be in a rush to put a record store on many high streets set to be deprived of HMV in the current climate, given that ‘the capital needed to open a record shop is quite large’. How then can stores like Rise look to succeed? Lawrence attributes their robustness to how they’ve approached the issue of changing consumers. ‘Getting people through the door is the biggest challenge. When we didn’t have the café or the clothing it was a lot more difficult because people walk past a record shop now and think “I don’t buy records”’. Rise have introduced a café space run by Friska, a range of vintage

Søren explains that he doesn’t like to think too much: ‘the body is a tool you just play. It could be records that I heard 10 years ago and that are still in my body. I like the records that you can go back to and it reminds you of a time. Nirvana Nevermind reminds me of being 17 and I still have the same feeling inside of me when I listen to the track that I had back then.’ Making music is a way to transcend the barriers of time, to make your mark in the world, to capture a moment of being and record it. ‘I like the idea that you can start on a song and two hours later you have invented something that was not in the world before. When a record comes out, the music is there and is going to be there longer than I am. It will exist in the world longer than human life - I like that idea.’ The tracks on the album are whole worlds in themselves, created with elaborately layered multi-track recordings. ‘I think about layers and waves in music. You have the bass, you have the middle and you have the top. I think a lot about the way I mix things. It’s like a painting. When you start making a painting, you create a lot of layers to get the background right, to create the perfect colour mix. I think about music really graphically. You don’t want everything to be equal, going into the same direction, you want it to be textured, contoured.’ Somewhere Else is certainly successful in its aim; the bubbling polyphonic melodies and reverberating distortion create a wonderful image in the listeners mind: best to lie back with your eyes closed and let it flow over you. Somewhere Else is out now on 4AD.

clothing, reducing the floor space solely dedicated to records as a reaction to the changes in consumer preferences, but this doesn’t detract from the ethos of the store. ‘The key thing about the shop is passion about the product. The staff know what they’re talking about and they’re passionate about it.’ The focus for independent record stores moves away from hard selling - if ever that was the focus - and onto engendering a sense of community, ‘if you get them to stay in the store for long enough – the rest will come’. The focus at Rise is precisely this, encouraging active participation in the culture that surrounds a record store, at Rise Bristol you won’t find just records, food and clothes – but film nights, pub quizzes and in-store performances. ‘This is a place that could be a hub for creativity. We’re lucky because it’s a great space. We want to get as many outside organisations and promoters to come in and use it.’ The lesson to learn for record stores following on from HMV’s demise is a simple one; don’t lose sight of the customer. Though it is a difficult one to put correctly into practice, but at Rise, the customer hasn’t been lost sight of and they provide a blueprint for what the future of record stores could and perhaps should be like. ‘If I was a customer, I would absolutely love this shop, that’s what I try to base it on.’

Epigram

18.02.2013

25 27

Reviews HOLY FIRE Foals Transgressive 11th February 2013 ‘Indie disco stuff ’s dead,’ says Yannis Philippakis, a bold claim considering his band’s elevation to arena status, with three upcoming Albert Hall gigs, is a result of their original ‘indie disco’ style. Five years after their first release Antidotes, Foals have returned with Holy Fire, continuing the development of their style evident from Total Life Forever. Produced by Flood and Alan Moulder, who have worked with artists like Smashing Pumpkins and Nine Inch Nails, there has obviously been a heavy rock inf luence, with most of the album having a very strong drive from distorted guitar and drums. With respect to their previous albums, Holy Fire is underpinned by strong rhythms, driving the music in a way that is new for Foals. Despite this, their intricate style and pizzicato guitar patterns have remained, giving the impression that they want to move their style forward, but are still reluctant to abandon their original style. Yannis’ vocals, despite slightly average lyrics at times (see ‘Stepson’), are more confident and exposed than on earlier albums. ‘My Number’, described by Yannis as

LESSER EVIL Doldrums Arbutus 26th February ‘unashamedly funk’, is probably the single most suited to the typical Foals fan, both holding onto the sound that defines Foals and also showing their new, more muscular approach. The other single, ‘Inhaler’, is much more visceral than ‘My Number’. ‘Providence’, however, is the weakest song, overcooking their rock approach almost into incoherence. Their climactic song structure, mastered in ‘Two Steps, Twice’ from Antidotes and ‘Spanish Sahara’ in Total Life Forever, is again found in ‘Late Night’, beginning with subdued vocals, almost pleading ‘Oh mamma do you hear me?/ Calling out your name’, and ending in an intense and frantic climax. ‘Milk and Black Spiders’ is similarly restrained, beginning intricately with echoed vocals, but building up to a peak that is arguably the highlight of the album, encapsulating the combination of their new and old styles. Overall, Holy Fire is an exciting step forwards for Foals. Their new approach is mostly appealing and well executed, but they’ve also retained their precise, rhythm-driven style from previous albums. Indie disco might be dead, but Foals certainly aren’t. Jamie Maule

180 Palma Violets Rough Trade 25th February

MBV My Bloody Valentine mybloodyvalentine.org 2nd February On the 4th of November 1991, Vic Reeves And The Wonderstuff topped the UK singles chart with their rendition of ‘Dizzy’, the mp3 had only just been invented, John Major was almost ready to celebrate a year as PM and My Bloody Valentine released their second album, Loveless. Over twenty years have passed since that date, and on the 2nd of February 2013 the release of mbv crashed the band’s website and inevitably sent every music writer, blog and website into an unparalleled frenzy. The rumours, half-truths and tales of the recording process for Loveless eventually became part of the legend, and for every story of the 19 studios used, the impact on Creation Records or the countless sound engineers, there were hundreds more clouding everything you thought you knew about the way Shields went about making one of the records of the decade. The eagerly awaited follow-up to 1987 debut Isn’t Anything, a classic in itself, redifined the roles of vocals and guitars, and the layering necessary to completely immerse the listener in a continuous and utterly ethereal experience. To call Loveless ‘influential’ does not even begin to do it justice - the record changed how electric guitars were recorded, and how Shields became

Like fellow Canadian artists Grimes and Purity Ring, Airick Woodhead (better known by stage name Doldrums) is from the same emerging scene of arty electronic pop. On his debut album Lesser Evil, Doldrums demonstrates very adventurous experimentation using obscure samples, loops and other bizarre vocal effects to create some original but very erratic music. The glitchy breakdown of the intro track followed by the steady marching beat of ‘Anomaly’ make for a great album opener without hinting at the dramatic style changes that are to follow. ‘She Is the Wave’ is definitely the most frenetic track, with distorted samples being fired off everywhere while Woodhead’s panicked vocals just about hold everything together. The extra beats jammed in on ‘Golden Calf’ along with wailing pitch shifted synths give the album one of its most unsettling moments. The music is constantly coming at you from different angles, not wanting to stay the same for more than a few bars at a time, possibly reflecting Woodhead’s own feelings of nomadic restlessness. Lesser Evil is a brilliant attempt at Woodhead trying to convey his own strange reality. Unfortunately, the eclectic result is not one that is immediately very accessible. James Lindsay

the most notable ‘wall of sound’ producer since Phil Spector. Post-rock, dream pop and noise rock seem unimaginable in a world devoid of Loveless, and the hastily termed ‘shoegaze’ genre of bands including Slowdive, Ride and Cocteau Twins of the era. Summing up the nine (high bit-rate) tracks of mbv in a few vague and imprecise superlatives would be an affront to the effort and years spent on its creation. The most basic and impression, is that it sounds a bit like Loveless. There is no unexpected momentum shift, and opener ‘She Found Now’ immediately plunges into a distant world of distortion and pitch bending. The driving drums from Colm Ó Cíosóig, the only other founding member still playing with Shields, increase the volume on ‘Only Tomorrow’. ‘Is This And Yes’ and ‘If I Am’ are ambient and patient, building towards the album’s breathless and challenging finale of ‘Nothing Is’ and the unmistakable and extraordinary ‘Wonder 2’. For all the sound-alikes and discussion of Shields’s work over the past twenty-odd years, mbv still manages to sound futuristic and immediate. Although surpassing expectations was inevitably an impossible task, mbv certainly satisfies them far better than their countless imitators. Gareth Davies

Bands built up as much as Palma Violets either have their music unquestioningly accepted or savagely scrutinised. In their case, as the anointed saviours of the NME, the reality is undoubtedly the latter. Ironically, their collision of scrappy garage rock and soft psychedelia requires the absence of cynicism to be appreciated, as their appeal lies in a naive and youthful romanticism. And they’re not shy about it. 180 is heralded by the jagged 3-chord salute of ‘Best Of Friends’ that is intoxicating, despite its obvious simplicity. It serves as the blueprint for an album which never again quite reaches its euphoric heights, although the ramshackle edge of ‘Rattlesnake Highway’ and bleary eyed intensity of ‘Tom The Drum’ come close. They attempt to deviate from this blueprint in the criminally-titled introspection of ‘Chicken Dippers’ and ‘Last Of The Summer Wine’, a nostalgic ode to the passing of youth that is still soaked in the wistful romance that runs throughout the album. That said, 180 feels far more like a collection of songs rather than a true album. But though its depth may be lacking, its instantaneous highs and rousing emotional outbursts amount to an innocent pleasure for the heart, rather than the head. Phil Gwyn

YOU’RE NOTHING Iceage Matador 19th February When the word ‘punk’ enters conversation my mind flashes with images of zit-covered, nitinfested, angst-ridden teens laden in corroded, cigarette-infused leather coats which would leave Danny Zuko himself questioning his fashion sense. But when I hear the words ‘Danish artpunk’, well… my mind goes blank. So when I first sat down to listen to Iceage’s second album, I had no clue what to expect. The band don’t hesitate to introduce themselves. The opening song, ‘Ecstasy’, starts off with the familiar groan of a distorted amp turned up way too loud and then skyrockets into a loud upbeat composition of erratic guitar, harsh bass and explosive drums which all add up to sound akin to a teenage garage band. This theme flows throughout the album, which gives the vibe of a preppy indie band stripped down to its earthy roots and rebuilt again with rusty iron meshed together with Viking war hammers, a characteristic shown in the songs ‘Everything Drifts’ and ‘Wounded Hearts’, but most effectively in ‘Morals’. It would be wrong to characterise this music as ‘easy-listening’, but that isn’t what the band was aiming for. Whatever their aim was, it’s not half-bad. Liam Wilkinson

HONEYS Pissed Jeans Sub Pop 12th February Until I first heard ‘Bathroom Laughter’, the first track off this latest effort from Pennsylvania’s most rockin-est white collar workers, I had no idea a bass guitar could whine. But there it is, buzzing in your ear like a giant drunken hornet leaning in to complain about its day. After a blast of white noise, the band crash in, and the album kicks off as it means to continue; pummelling, sludgy, irate and tons of fun. You get the feeling that these guys immensely enjoy playing, even if just for the catharsis. The angst in this band’s music apparently stems from the mundanity of adult corporate and domestic life that is captured by the tracks ‘Health Plan’ and ‘Chain Worker’. All this means that Pissed Jeans don’t seem to take themselves as seriously as they probably could. It’s not that they’re selling their considerable instrumental talent short – in fact without it, lyrics about cafeteria food and project managers might not sound quite as fury-inducing as they actually can be in real life. There are a few duds – the album works best on a track by track basis – but overall the band’s righteous, unpretentious musical pissedness, carried through with just enough humour, manage to make something great out of the mundane. Mike Hegarty

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Film & TV

Epigram

Editor: Jasper Jolly

Deputy Editor: Kate Samuelson

filmandtv@epigram.org.uk

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The rise of the video game

Tom Brada

Disney

like a betrayal of your original gaming experience. There is also a sense that the nature of gaming genres are either too narratively flimsy or, inversely, too complex to lend themselves to a film narrative. Platform games tend to offer very basic characters and

‘‘

Could this be the turning point for the video game film or merely a brief respite for a doomed genre?

’’

minimal storyline and the majestic flop of the 1993 Super Mario Bros movie demonstrates this difficulty, with Bob Hoskins, who played Mario, describing it modestly as ‘the worst thing I ever did.’ Similarly, first-person shooter games a la 1997’s Hitman, largely consist of plot-free, gun-toting madness which can end up as rather vapid viewing experiences, roving from one

Learning how to say No Alejandro Palekar Fernandez

No Released 8th February, Dir. Pablo Lorraín, 118 mins

Pablo Larraín’s film is a simple, albeit effective dramatisation of one of the key moments in Chilean history. No deals with the plebiscite of 1988, which allowed Chileans to choose between a further eight years of dictatorship under Pinochet’s oppressive regime, or freedom. The key protagonist, René, played by Gael Garcia Bernal, is approached by the opposition, to design the ‘no’ campaign, encouraging people to vote against the dictator remaining in

@epigramfilm

Reviewed: Wreck-It Ralph

Tom Brada: Are we seeing the start of a convergence between film and games? Rich Moore’s latest film, Wreck-it Ralph (above) is a jolly affair set within the wild world of arcade and video games. Using video games as the underlying concept for the movie is an interesting choice, since in recent times video game adaptation films have struggled both critically and commercially. Superficially, it would seem that video games provide the ideal template for a film, as characters and a narrative are already developed within the game. However, as of 2013 not a single video game movie has managed to get a Fresh rating over 50% on Rotten Tomatoes and according to Box Office Mojo, only one video game movie Tomb Raider, has managed to surpass the $100 million box office mark. One possible explanation for this miserable reception could be attributed to the fact that video games provide gamers with a very personal, idiosyncratic experience. As such, the imposition of a director’s particular vision as well as the casting of actors who may not conform to your personal vision of the lead characters, can feel

18.02.2013

melodramatic action sequence to another with a distinct lack of cohesion from scene to scene. On the other hand, role-playing and adventure games, like the Lara Croft games series, are so intricate in their detail that trying to compress their narratives into a twohour film inevitably leaves out a great deal of essential plotlines, making for a generally confusing movie and frustrating deviation from the original game narrative. Video games tend to have particularly strong visual and narrative identities which can be easily corrupted when transferred into cinematic form. However, far be it for Hollywood not to persevere with a failing format and there are numerous video game

Wreck-it Ralph, the latest animated output from Disney is a quirky film which follows the down-in-thedumps character Ralph - who literally lives in a dump - as he struggles with an existential crisis. Ralph is the villain character in the Fix–it Felix arcade game and is tired of being misunderstood and mistreated by the ‘good’ characters who work with him. In order to earn the respect of his pixelated peers, Ralph sets out on a mission to earn a gaming medal, an endeavor which takes him through a variety of arcade game worlds, with referential nods to a range of classic video games, ranging from Call of Duty to Sonic the Hedgehog. Along the way, Ralph picks up a sarcastic companion in the form of a rather whiny little girl, Vanellope Von Schweetz and together the pair must confront numerous dangers in the Sugar Rush racing world where they meet. A parallel storyline sees the peppy Fix-It Felix searching for Ralph while forming a little and

films on the horizon with particular hype surrounding Michael Fassbender’s imminent star turn in an upcoming adaptation of Assassin’s Creed. Meanwhile, Wreck-it Ralph seeks to buck the troubled trend surrounding videogame movies and so far, its personal twist on the

large romance with the gun-toting Sgt Tamara Calhoun from CoD’s analogue, Hero’s Duty. John C. Reilly’s wholesome tones give the well-meaning Ralph a weighty presence and a likeable warmth, which contrasts with Sarah Silverman’s nasal drawl lending her impish character the interesting combination of being both adorable and annoying. The unlikely relationship between these two fuels the narrative and provides most of the humour as they bicker and squabble their way to personal understanding. The comedy is supplemented by punnery galore with particular amusing incidents involving Nesquik sand and a ‘Fun’geon where miscreant characters are locked away. The film’s mix of silly and sardonic is guaranteed to appeal to both adults and children alike, while resonating warmly with all nostalgic gaming aficionados.

Wreck-It Ralph Released 8th February, Dir. Rich Moore, 108 mins

genre is proving an anomalous success, with an Oscar nomination already in the bag and an 85% Fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes. Could this be the turning point for the video g a m e film or merely a brief respite for a doomed genre? Only time will tell.

Sergeant Calhoun from Disney’s Wreck-It Ralph: a symbol of the way in which games and films are becoming closer? Picture: Disney

encourage democratic beliefs, within the context of a dictatorship, is the film’s key theme, and is absolutely power. Allowed 15 minutes enthralling. on television each day for Diverse political 28 days – and only due to beliefs and external pressure – they opinions are are forced to come up explored through with a programme that is both didactic different characters, and entertaining. René opts for an emphasising optimistic approach, t h e focusing on the uncertainty benefits of freedom and chaos of such a and choice rather than criticising the brutality situation. In of Pinochet’s regime, one instance, and the deaths and René’s nanny disappearances it e q u a t e s sponsored. This Pinochet’s struggle to regime A man apart: Gael Garcia Bernal stars as an advertising w i t h express, and executive with a positive message. Picture: Watershed stability, and the

plebiscite as unnecessarily breaking the status quo – though this seems unexpected, it helps one understand the various diverging points of view on the matter, and how the dictatorship affected people in different ways, in both its positive and its negative impacts. Despite its deceivingly simple storyline, No delves into deep issues, such as the nature and meaning of democracy, and, through its portrayal of the advertising industry, party politics and political indoctrination. Moreover, Larraín’s decision to use old cameras gives the film a ‘vintage’ feel, making it seem like it really is something out of the ‘80s. This, combined with intertwining footage from the actual ‘no’ campaign, give the film an authentic feel. Truly worth watching, No is an unforgiving, unbiased, realistic look at Chile’s rapid transition, the bloodless battle and its consequences as a testament to the power of film.

Oscars 2013

Go online now for our predictions and analysis

Epigram

18.02.2013

From Slumdogs to Pi: India in film Alejandro Palekar Fernández

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Slumdog Millionaire was widely criticised in India and classified as ‘Poverty Porn’

’’

Positivism is a key feature of all these films, but there is more to them. They also illustrate some values that we have lost in the western world, which are embodied in Indian culture. The strong concept of family is one example: the Indian elderly in The Best Exotic

Edward Carden is suitably impressed with Flemish fight-film, Bullhead

Bullhead Released 1st February 2013 Dir. Michael Roskam, 129 mins

Bollywood. There are a wide range of realist and art-house films, such as Salaam Bombay! or The Apu Trilogy which focus on the issues of Indian society, but these do require more patience, and are for those who are interested in the ugly problems concealed by all the beautiful colours. Midnight’s Children is an example of a film which tries both to entertain and preach, yet, where Salman Rushdie’s novel succeeded in doing so, the film fails due to its large amount of metaphorical characters, the symbolism of which cannot be fully explored in such a short space of time. Each film is made with a target audience, and India is becoming a popular filming destination because western audiences have responded well to such films. It is not the distribution

of wealth but a common culture which makes a country and, if these filmmakers have chosen to set their projects in India it is most likely not due to the mass inequality but, rather, due to the vibrant, exotic culture. Whether or not these films make a social commentary is irrelevant, since they are made by foreigners who cannot do anything to solve India’s myriad problems anyway. However, by using India as a backdrop, not only are they enriching their own films, but also the cultural awareness of their viewers. Moreover, they carry an important positive message: poverty does not necessarily connote unhappiness or a doomed future. In doing so, they encourage western audiences to be more hopeful and optimistic, just like Pi.

The Master of Suspense Kate Samuelson Anthony Hopkins is a wonderful Alfred Hitchcock. His mannerisms and appearance are uncanny; Hopkins’ superbly convincing acting forces you to believe that you aren’t watching a film about Hitchcock, but you are watching Alfred Hitchcock himself, as he struggles to get Psycho made in remarkably conservative 1960s Hollywood.

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Hopkins and Mirren have a fabulous dynamic.

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Hitchcock is depicted as a bit of a sad case – he’s living in the memory of his past success stories. Despite knowing that ‘you’re only as good as your last film’, he cannot understand why financiers and distributors aren’t arguing over the rights to his latest

movie, and - as his wife Alma, played by the marvellous Helen Mirren, aptly points out - he doesn’t know why his leading ladies, specifically Janet Leigh (Scarlett Johansson), aren’t as besotted with him as he is with them. The film, unusually for a biopic, focuses on Hitchcock’s relationship with Alma Reville, often concentrating on Alma as an individual, rather than simply Hitchcock’s wife. The film suggests that Alma had a strong influence on Hitchcock’s work. However, critics have claimed this influence is exaggerated. Hopkins and Mirren have a fabulous dynamic, they are both highly convincing in their roles and this level of believability in their relationship brings a far more personal feel to the film than it would have if it was solely focused on Hitchcock’s later career. Hitchcock is amusing,with memorable one-liners, from Hitchcock’s claim that ‘She [Johansson] won’t be fully naked therackedfocus.com

Throughout the sprawling, complex plot, he finds himself increasingly hunted and paranoid as the police tighten the net on the mobs. Matthias Schoenaerts plays Jacky like De Niro in Raging Bull, a stormy bundle of testosterone who fights himself as much as his adversaries. Indeed, he moves like a bull, and even remarks on the fact himself. In a sense, the whole film follows man’s propensity to behave bestially. The intensity that the viewer is forced to endure leaves them with plenty to chew over. The pace of Bullhead, as can so often be the case in world cinema, is the antithesis of Hollywood’s supersonic, controlled narrative. Instead, it is contemplative, pausing to drink in the beauty and sadness of life. The audience will have a strong emotional contract with the film; it moves you, whether in a positive or negative way is for you to discover. The Watershed

On paper, Bullhead shouldn’t be very enjoyable. Flemish films about abuses within the Belgian meat trade rarely are. But Bullhead isn’t actually about agriculture, it’s about gangsters - Flemish farmers injecting their animals with illegal narcotics to enhance their size, protecting the racket with violence. But then it turns out not to be about that really either; initial narrative layers aside, Bullhead is a study of small-town politics, redemption and emotional trauma. It focuses on Jacky Vanmarsenille, a steroid-pumped farmer and enforcer, whose world is shaken after the local murder of an anti-mafia cop. Director Michael Roskam has managed to evoke the rural community uncomfortably well. Its brutality, conservatism and inwardness become stifling - the two Walloon car mechanic buffoons acting as brief comic relief. Little happens in the dull countryside o f quiet farms and stale restaurants and bars, where racism and homophobia are status quo. But the nefarious criminality surfaces to bludgeon the tranquillity and assault the characters. It is this web of feuding and betrayal which has created the beast of Jacky. Some mysterious childhood trauma twisted his soul, and now he is a hormone-ingesting brawler driven by serious problems with his masculinity. The incident is revealed later, in what is probably the most harrowing scene that I’ve witnessed in cinema.

Slumdog Millionaire star Dev Patel plays a hotel owner in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

celebs.com

Brutal and beautiful

Marigold Hotel are always surrounded by their family - contrasting the elderly couple of Haneke’s masterpiece Amour, whose loneliness is typical in Europe. This traditionalism further adds to the country’s exoticism and the disparities between Indian and western culture. Interestingly though, Slumdog Millionaire was widely criticised in India and classified as ‘Poverty Porn’ despite prevailing hope being its key theme. Perhaps this is due to the fact that such films depict a foreign outlook on Indian life, exoticising practices which, to the locals, are nothing special, while exploring issues which are so accepted they need not be mentioned. However, such negative reception is also due to the effect of Bollywood culture, which has promoted film as a means of escapism, something completely distinct from the reality of daily life; this could be why Slumdog Millionaire’s explicit treatment of the unspoken truths of Indian society received such a backlash in India. The film was, after all, made for Western audiences. Indeed, Bollywood is another key reason why filmmakers are increasingly opting to work in India rather than in other possible locations: the resources are there, as well as experienced professionals, only cheaper than Hollywood. Nevertheless it is important not to stereotype Indian cinema as just

CNT

India in film - Midnight’s Children and Life of Pi both tread the path of Slumdog Millionaire. Are these films accurate light-hearted portrayals, or fantasies masking something else? Either way, India is only going to take a bigger role in film in the future. Swiftly developing into one of the most powerful countries in the world, India has become a popular hub for skilled workers migrating from their home countries. But they are not the only ones who see the potential in India; it is increasingly becoming the backdrop of many international film productions. The vibrant colours, natural beauty and its distinctive culture make India an ideal alternative setting for stories that are slightly different. Yet the majority of these successful films set in India are British productions, featuring British actors, and targeted at a British audience. ‘British’ is the key word here. Most of these productions are made from an outsider’s perspective, so the films emphasise the country’s exoticism, while ignoring other issues. Slumdog Millionaire, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, West is West and Life of Pi are but a few examples, which all share a feelgood nature. West is West and The Best Exotic

Marigold Hotel stress the differences between Indian and western cultures, with a special focus on contrasting attitudes. The British as protagonists are characterised by their pessimism, and their intense fear of poverty, whereas the poor locals never lose their hope, and are happy despite their dire situation. Though poverty is referenced as an obvious issue, it is mostly portrayed as something which people can grow out of, or can live happily with. Hope and optimism, even in the worst circumstances, is the key theme of all these. In Life of Pi, despite being on a raft alone with a tiger in the middle of the Ocean, Pi does not lose hope; likewise, Jamal in Slumdog Millionaire is another character who refuses to give up, regardless of the obstacles preventing his success.

– she’ll have a shower cap on!’ to his touching conversation with Alma at the film’s conclusion, where he remarks: ‘That, my dear, is why they call me The Master of Suspense’. Yet it disappointingly lacks the elements of excitement and glamour that ordinarily come hand in hand with films about vintage Hollywood. The scene where Hitchcock stands outside the door of the first screening of Psycho, waiting for the initial scream of terror, is one of the most memorable moments in the film. The shocking nature of Psycho, which is, by today’s standards, a rather tame film, was an interesting aspect of Hitchcock. Comparing the ‘horror’ of Pyscho to gory torture scenes in films like The Human Centipide, Saw or any of the Final Destinations makes the 1960s audience’s severe terror seem rather bemusing. Hitchcock wasn’t a particuarly glamorous or thrilling film, but it was certainly was enjoyable. Not just for Hitchcock fans.

Hitchcock Released 8th February 2013 Dir. Sacha Gervasi, 98 mins

Epigram

18.02.2013

Derek: no better second time round The ‘Underwhelmist’ Ben Willey

Michelle Chamroo: What has happened to the once venomously cynical Charlie Brooker?

whatculture.com

been cringeworthy, they at least seemed recognisable and genuinely funny. Here they become tiresome, quickly. A revelation in all of this is the performance of Karl Pilkington (above), Ricky Gervais’ long time and round-headed friend, star of recent travel-based comedy An Idiot Abroad. He plays the permanently annoyed caretaker as an extension of his permanently annoyed self - which anyone who has ever listened to The Ricky Gervais Show or his exploits on London radio station XFM should be very familiar with - and is easily the funniest character in the show. If you watch Derek for one thing, watch it for Karl Pilkington and his ridiculous wig.

Channel 4

Derek: season two Channel 4, Wednesdays at 10pm

What actually happens in Kavos? Isabelle Kerr: As a particularly squeamish person, I would rather not know

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Partying on a hot island with colourful cocktails is certainly not the focus of the show

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bit worse for wear. Faced with the impossible task of stimulating fresh interest in a fairly repetitive genre, the producers have clearly resorted to the aim of destroying any faith you may have left in humanity. The first episode bears no qualms. We watch in disbelief as one boy downs a pint of someone else’s urine, the routine punishment for sleeping with the same person three times (see

photo, left). He then proceeds to throw up – all of which we are joyfully invited to watch. As someone who is ridiculously squeamish, I was in for a shock. The glamour of partying on a hot island with colourful cocktails is certainly not the focus of the show. By the end of the first episode you are left questioning whether or not you have mistakenly watched a spin-off show from Casualty. From infected foot injuries to obscure genital problems, the show is certainly not the best dinner accompaniment. So if you’re considering a Greek party holiday or just fancy watching some trashy TV, think about whether or not you really want to know what happens in Kavos. In the case of this programme, ignorance is definitely bliss. What happens in Kavos... Channel 4, catch up on 4oD

there were their menacing mugs, billboards, buses and any valuable advertising space on offer. I’d got high hopes; Mitchell’s take on the world is miserably enjoyable, as is Brooker’s, and how could this not be entertaining? As with most things you really look forward to, it was a complete anticlimax. I watched the show cringing at the awkward links and lack of decent material. The tool which had been used to market the show so aggressively, effectively bought about its demise; Twitter eventually turned against Ten O’Clock Live, bringing with it much support from the public. And so it disappeared into the black hole of TV failures never to be spoken of again. Black Mirror’s exploration of new media technologies and their impact on our lives offered an insight into Brookers dark mind, and dark it is why would anyone consider making the Prime Minister have sex with a pig? Making the Prime Minister donate all his earnings to charity, or even making him watch Les Miserables on a loop for all of eternity would suffice. N ev e r t h e l e s s , Brooker missed the mark in Black Mirror and the lack of depth of the characters and sophistication in the plot and discourse left me cold. On the cusp of another series of Black Mirror. I wonder how well it will be received, or if it will mysteriously disappear like Ten O’Clock Live did. Brooker won the 2012 Best Comedy Entertainment Personality at the British Comedy Awards, which, for me marks his decline in popularity with his dyed in the wool cynical devotees. Has Brooker watered down his acerbic tongue in order to increase his popularity, to the detriment of his integrity? Or has married life and fatherhood softened the once venerated sharp satirical wit? On Twitter, Brooker’s bio states, ‘Underwhelmist’. I tend to agree with this now.

Black Mirror: season two Channel 4, Mondays at 10pm

BBC

struggling with. Unlike similar programmes such as Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents, which redeem themselves by actually making you laugh, Kavos leaves you feeling a

Charlie Brooker, how you disappoint thee, let me count the ways... In a recent column, Brooker tackles Justin Bieber - for the love of god, why is Brooker even considering writing a piece on such an utter twerp? I’m sorry but I just can’t stand Justin ‘I haven’t even started puberty, how can I know anything about life, let alone love?’ Bieber, which is why I find it so ridiculous that Brooker would even consider writing an article on the little moron. Brooker doesn’t take this opportunity to let rip on Bieber, and instead bangs on about how Bieber is aging; the venom has dissipated, as has my interest in Brooker’s writing. The fact that I struggled to finish reading the article speaks volumes in itself; I once ripped through Charlie Brooker columns with relish, defending the content from the comment trolls who dared to criticise my favourite journalist. However, now I tend to agree with them and almost feel compelled to join in. In I Can Make You Hate, Brooker actually apologises to ‘celebrities’ he has previously attacked. Why the sudden change of heart? Brooker’s popularity stemmed from his no-holds-barred approach; he would openly mock the status of ‘celebrity’ and the fact that most ‘celebrities’ lacked any talent at all, particularly reality TV stars. It could be argued that Brooker began to change and soften when he married Konnie Huq, former Blue Peter presenter. Huq’s decision to present The Xtra Factor must have proved difficult for Brooker to swallow. Historically attacking such awful, mindless ‘reality’ shows, Charlie Brooker’s loyalty now lies with Konnie. There was no way he could continue his entertaining, yet biting attacks on such programmes without the possibility of his new wife promptly chucking him out. The hotly anticipated Ten O’Clock Live was an unprecedented flop. It had the key ingredients to be pretty phenomenal; Brooker, Mitchell, Carr and the sometimes funny and completely under used Laverne. Moreover, everywhere you looked

Channel 4

Lad?

Family bonding? This mother and daughter came to Kavos to learn more about ancient Greece.

Photo: the Mirror

When sat in the ASS sheltering from the routine Bristol rain, Kavos certainly seems appealing. And what better way to feel closer to the Greek island than by witnessing the experiences of young revellers as they set out to endure the party season in Mediterranean paradise? So, Channel 4 has splashed out to fund yet another Brits-abroad reality show to ‘reveal’ the uncensored world of sixth form dreams. With all due credit, the title gets to the point and accurately fulfils its aim of showing you exactly what happens in Kavos. Sick, sex and STIs are first on the menu and, despite their favourite axiom, what happens in Kavos certainly does not stay in Kavos. The show loosely focuses upon the infamous ‘reps’ who work the entire party season. Why are they there? Because ‘our generation has it so crap’ - the solution is clearly Kavos. We are given the dubious opportunity to watch their countless STI tests (Greek style) and a variety of sex games involving dry humping and cucumbers. Having faced the streets of Aiya Napa myself, I can understand the perks of these holidays. But seeing someone throw up in someone else’s mouth I’m

The Times

It’s a difficult thing for a fan of Ricky Gervais’s previous work to write off Derek after two episodes and a pilot. After all, even the most diehard fans of The Office would find it difficult to say they immediately warmed to that show. Those previous works were all examples of Gervais’ philosophy of ‘writing what you know’ - he had worked in an office and, after becoming famous, experienced the awkwardness of working on a film set as seen in Extras - but Derek seems to be uncharted territory for Gervais with its exploration of the ebb and flow of life in a retirement home, and it shows. Derek is a worker at a retirement home and the show revolves around him and his - two - mates, as well as the care home manager, Hannah. The pace is deliberately slow and we have lots of shots of people-just-sitting-doing-

nothing, in the same way that The Office was interspersed with shots of the photocopier working. In contrast to The Office and Extras, though, is the relentless niceness - there is no backstabbing, politics or vengefulness and the show hinges on Derek’s ‘perfect’ personality. In fact, a lot of the criticism of the pilot for Derek focused on the fact that Gervais seemed to be openly mocking what was clearly a mentally challenged character. In reality, this seems to be unfounded and based on society’s need to categorise everyone unnecessarily. It is deftly dealt with in a sequence where a council worker asks whether Derek would be willing to be tested for autism. ‘Will that change me in any way, would I be the same person?’ he asks. ‘Yes’, Hannah reassures him. ‘Don’t worry about it then’, Derek replies. One person conspicuously absent in the development is Steve Merchant, Gervais’s former writing partner. In his absence, Gervais has clearly been allowed free reign to push some of the jokes to the distasteful, such as whenever hanger-on Kevin appears on screen. When he heads out with Derek to get signatures for a petition against the home’s closure, he says to one woman: ‘I think I do stand a chance with you, if I get you a bit pissed up and teary’. Whilst on first - or second - viewing of The Office, the long pauses and inappropriate comments might have

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Epigram

18.02.2013

Time to start running the right way Alex Shelley Sports Reporter Many regular gym-goers and joggers are likely to have been subjected to – and aesthetically offended by – the Vibram FiveFinger shoes, which are now cropping up across the country in place of more traditional brands and styles of trainers. For those who haven’t been looking, these new shoes are ultrathin and separate the toes individually: in effect, they fit the foot like a glove. In terms of appearence, the shoes are u n d e n i a b ly ugly but there is a methodology behind

Christoper McDougall narrates his own experience of an injuryplagued running career after asking himself ‘Why does my foot hurt?’ His findings, which are drawn from a wealth of external research and personal experience, have signalled the dawn of a new way of thinking about how the running shoe should function. In the simplest terms possible McDougall concludes (as many others have done) that humans are of course designed to run barefoot, and therefore any trainers which resist this process (e.g. shoes with a thick cushioning) c a n

shoe that increasingly seek to protect our feet with layers of cushioning? McDougall suggests that a general rise in the number of running related injuries can be understood as a by-product of this artificiality or movement ‘away from nature’: namely, that the prominence of heavily-cushioned shoes has allowed – or even encouraged – many of us to run badly. Without wanting to resort to pop-anthropological generalisations in order to make grand points about how we live (and run) in contemporary society, it is clear that our early ancestors hunted on foot over l a rg e distances. Indeed t h i s

in a sense be considered u n n a t u r a l . Superficially this need not be a problem, and it could be argued that cumbersome running shoes are just responding to changing terrains: after all, how ‘natural’ is tarmac or a treadmill? If the ‘unnaturalness’ or artificiality of cushioned trainers is not a problem in itself, then what is wrong with the types of

modern civilisations, including the recently-studied Tarahumara tribe of Mexico, who continue to cover endurance-length grounds while running barefoot. A common observation about barefoot-running is that it encourages toe-striking, where the ball of the foot hits the ground first and the toes

strategy (which focused on shock-absorption and accommodation of otherwise bad running techniques) must be held at least partially responsible for the spiralling complaints of running injuries ever since. Shoes like the Vibram FiveFinger seek to overcome this vicious cycle by promoting a ‘return to nature’, where runners are forced to be fleet-footed and run correctly

McDougall concludes, as many others have done, that humans are of course designed to run barefoot

”

it is hard to ignore the commonly-observed correlation between the advent of the mass-produced and massadvertised running shoe that offers ‘protection’ to the runner against injury, and the paradoxical rise of the frequency of running injuries in this timespan. In ‘Born to Run’ McDougall resolves that the ‘Running Boom’ in America in the 1970s – where the numbers of recreational joggers, inspired by cultural icons like Steve Prefontaine, exploded – prompted a simultaneous drive by major sports companies to provide shoes for larger markets. The commercialisation of the running shoe need not be dangerous, but the direction of this marketing

McDougall advocates a return to ‘natural’ running

BC to DC by bike to raise money for HYT In May, Bristol University student Marcus Farnfield and a friend will be attempting to cycle the astronomical distance from Vancouver to Washington DC. Covering roughly 5000km in only 50 days, they are doing it to raise money for the Haileybury Youth Trust, which does some great work helping young people in Uganda. Follow their progress and help them raise a £ per km at www.bctodc.tumblr.com. Epigram wishes them all the best and will hopefully be covering their adventure once they set off on May 12th.

A bit further than cycling around the Downs...

because the complacency of endless cushioning has been stripped away: although it is easy to sneer at the ‘minimalist’ shoes, the science behind their appearance is far from laughable.

“

process s t i l l occurs in several

them which represents the culmination of an ever-growing emphasis on ‘minimalist’ running techniques. There is a strong cultural, economic and biomechanical rationale behind this trend. This, as I will explain, justifies the decision for many road and treadmillpounders to abandon heavilycushioned trainers in favour of shoes which clearly offer no such protection to the foot. In his influential and highly accessible book ‘Born to Run’,

separate and act as natural ‘shock absorbers’ to reduce the impact of the striking motion on the body. To do otherwise would be uncomfortable (imagine the jarring pain of running on your heels while barefoot), but recent research has suggested that trainers with lots of ‘padding’ have ensured that joggers are now regularly striking the ground heel-first. As anyone who has heard the thudding and battering of a heel-striker on a gym treadmill would testify,

Epigram

18.02.2013

BUCCC still bolting ahead this year

Bristol University Cross Country club have recently had two great events. Runner Alice James tells us about both an energetic performance in the annual BUCS Championships, as well as yet another successful effort in the Sodbury Slog

continued from back page

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when it comes to Wetherspoons bouncers, being a cross country runner is not a legitimate excuse for wearing trainers

”

Multiple layers were donned and malt loaf was devoured before heading back to the hotel.

The evening celebrations began at Pizza Express, where the club demolished nearly £700 worth of food. Then, after some fell victim to the Wetherspoons bouncers (apparently being a cross country runner is not a legitimate excuse for wearing trainers) we moved elsewhere for a quick drink before heading to the Leeds University Student Union for the BUCS after-party. The following day we made a stop-off in the Peak District for an 8 mile run around the beautiful Ladybower reservoir before heading back to Bristol. A hugely enjoyable weekend overall with some excellent results and the biggest ever number of participants from the club.

Charlie Mortimer Alice James

On arrival it was quickly discovered that the Bodington Hall playing fields had been transformed into what can only be described as a huge mud bath. Laces were thus tightened in anticipation for a bit of a challenge…then re-tightened after witnessing one competitor slide head first across the finish line. The first of the three races was the Men’s A 9.8km; Liam White was the first Bristol University competitor to cross the finish line followed by Alex Matchett and Duncan Birtwistle. Gwenno Brown, Anna Burton and Hannah Pollak were the 1st, 2nd and 3rd UBCC

competitors respectively in the 6.55km Women’s race, whilst Andy Salman, Rory Shanks and Alex Fordham were the fastest Bristol University competitors respectively in the 7.5km Men’s B race.

Sodbury Slog

Alice James

On Remembrance Sunday, a coach full of BUCCC runners dressed as Angels and Devils headed for Chipping Sodbury to take part in the 13th Annual Sodbury Slog. Once the current students had finished stapling tinsel to white T-shirts and the Alumni had plastered themselves in a sufficient amount of red body paint we took part in a quick warm up led by ‘Terry the Tornado’, who opted for Gangnam Style as his opening track. After listening to the Last Post and observing the 11:00

two minutes silence the race gun sounded. The Sodbury Slog essentially involves 9 miles of navigating mud pits, boggy fields and wading through streams with the occasional half a mile of solid ground thrown in for good measure. Perhaps the most impressive obstacle was the waist-deep ‘sheep dip’, requiring a pair of burly men and some rope at the far end to help competitors haul themselves out. The weather was kind, but that didn’t stop us all emerging looking as though we had suffered a faceplanting incident at a pig farm. The nature of the race was well

summed up by the area marked ‘Trainer Graveyard’ at the finish line. Bristol University current students and Alumni had some fantastic finishing times , with Oli Mott winning the Senior Men’s category and Steve Mitchell and Steve Francis crossing the line in joint 3rd place. In the Senior Women’s category Hilary Mott, Phillipa Williams and Hannah Pollack finished 1st, 2nd and 3rd respectively. Overall the Cross Country Club had a fantastic time at the Slog and celebrated in the evening with a hearty feast at Pizza Provencale.

Bristol Rovers FC set for revival on and off the field

UWE university students, and fans alike, will be pleased with The Pirates’ latest development plans and recent run of form George Starkey-Midha Sports Reporter

“

a realistic aim would be to start the 2015/2016 season in their new stadium, playing League 1 football

”

There have been concerns expressed by some supporters of ‘The Gas’ that there is little justification for a bigger home, considering the club’s relegation in 2011 and the faltering attendances that have followed

their struggle to bounce back. However a brief look at the UWE Stadium consultation website demonstrates the board’s unerring confidence that the increase in quality of transport links, parking facilities and spectator comfort will have a hugely positive impact on attendances, which is key to pushing the club up to the higher echelons of the Football League. Despite the excitement of the long-term potential of the club, for now the focus is on League Two survival. Only last month the Pirates were propping up the Football League with just 6 wins from 26 games, and despite a much-improved run of form that has seen them take 17 points out of the last possible 24, they sit only 5 points clear of the relegation zone with a third of the season’s games still to play. The turning point in Rovers’ season was undoubtedly the appointment of manager John Ward, back for his second spell with the club following the sacking of Mark McGhee in

December. Ward has brought an impressive determination and realism to the helm and is refusing to let his players get carried away with their recent results. Speaking before his side’s match away at Oxford United over the weekend, he emphasised the consistent high standards he expects from his team and made it clear that they must continue to put their all into the tough

The proposed UWE Stadium

relegation battle ahead: ‘We are enjoying a little bit of success at the moment, but we are still not out of the woods. We are still in a precarious position and that is something we still have to accept, understand and deal with.’ The 2-0 victory that followed was a testament to the work ethic and resolve that Ward has instilled into his players whose form is currently that of a promotion-chasing side.

If Bristol Rovers can beat the drop and Ward continues to lead the team’s rejuvenation beyond this term, a realistic aim would be to start the 2015/16 season in their new stadium, playing League 1 football. Despite their fierce rivals Bristol City enjoying their own mini-revival in the Championship, it is far from inconceivable that the Pirates may soon be challenging them for the top spot in the city.

lib.su

The Bristol students lucky enough to witness the University 1st XI Football team defeat UWE in last year’s Varsity match may be saddened to hear the news that Bristol Rovers plan to move from their Horfield spot to the rather unfortunately named UWE Stadium for the start of the 2015/16 season. The Memorial Stadium may hold a small place in the heart of many of these students, particularly for those who made it on to the pitch in the post-match invasion. Ultimately of course the decision will benefit Rovers in the long-term and chairman Nick Higgs has made it clear how important he considers the move to be for the future of the club. Last month, Bristol City Council approved the sale of the Pirates’ home for the past 15 years, and Higgs is open in his belief that it was the biggest day in their history. The decision to allow Sainsbury’s

to build a new supermarket on the Memorial site means the club can now proceed with plans to construct a new £40m 21,700-seater stadium based at UWE’s Frenchay campus. There is a real sense within the club that the increased capacity will be a springboard to take the club forward and the Rovers chairman was quick to highlight the success stories of the likes of Swansea, Reading and Cardiff as examples of the impact that a new ground can have.

Epigram

18.02.2013

Bullets retain Varsity crown with resounding win over Bristol Barracudas Maxwell Meuth Sports Reporter continued from back page

Bristol UWE

6 26

The Barracuda – playing their first game of 2013 – were looking to bounce back from a disappointing pre-Christmas performance at home to Plymouth, but it was UWE that hit the ground running. On the first drive of the game, the Cuda were unable to muster up anything meaningful and were forced to punt to the Bullets, who proceeded to march the ball down the field for the first touchdown of the game. Bullets 7-0 Cuda. Unable to find much luck

through the run game, Cuda looked to frequently move the ball through the air. A solid catch on a slant route by rookie receiver Jacob Whitehead looked to build some offensive momentum, but Bristol once again hit first down before getting down the field. The ensuing punt was fumbled, giving UWE great field position to start their drive, which they converted with an outside run to extend the lead. Bullets 14-0 Cuda.

“

the Barracudas showed great aggression and heart all day, especially from the defence

”

The offence headed back out, desperately looking to answer back. QB Jack Scott was still looking to throw the ball out wide, but unfortunately was picked off on a deep route following blitz pressure from the Bullets linebackers. The ball was subsequently returned to the Cuda 15-yard line and punched in on the following set of downs. Good tenacity from the Bristol line managed to block the PAT attempt, but it was already looking like a mountain to climb for the Cuda. Bullets 20-0 Cuda. The rest of the half was a tight affair with defences stepping up a gear. Strong work by linebacker George Barker saw that UWE’s trademark reverse plays were ineffective. Penalty flags were becoming a common occurrence as both

Christian Foss

teams looked to assert physical superiority over the game. The second half saw more of the same with offenses having little impact in the early stages. The Cuda finally made inroads into Bullets territory after one of Daniel Moore’s many booming punts was muffed by a UWE returner and recovered by the Barracuda. However, this was unable to be converted. The following Bullets possession saw them finally get the better

of the Cuda’s resilient defense and put another score on the board, all but ending Bristol’s chance of a comeback. The PAT was again missed, this time shanked into the left upright. Bullets 26-0 Cuda. However, the Cuda were not finished. Despite sending the kickoff well into the endzone, WR Toby Rickards skillfully caught the ball before finding a gap and breaking up field. An 80-yard kickoff return and

Christian Foss

A physical clash full of fumbles and stout defensive actions resulted in a defeat for the Barracudas

Bristol’s second of the season. A deserved consolation TD after great aggression and heart all day, especially from the Cuda defence. Bullets 26-6 Cuda FT. The Bristol Barracuda would like to thank the Bristol Jets Cheerleading squad and the Bristol Barracuda Alumni Foundation for superb support up at Filton yesterday, as well as the continued support from sponsors Armasec Security and Riley’s.

Response to the Department of Sport’s Epigram piece Hannah Pollak VP Sport&Health

I found it interesting to read Simon Hink’s, the University’s Director of Sport, recent piece in Epigram Sport on 4th February. The initial experience of opening the paper to see two contributions from staff from Sport, Exercise and Health was certainly a new occurrence. Not to suggest that this is negative - far from it.

It demonstrates the results of efforts of University staff to communicate in a more coherent and transparent way to the student body. However, this opens up the opportunity for debate and discussion on the role which the two institutions of SEH and UBU play in sport club development. It was rather worrying that the Student Union’s role in supporting club development was

completely disregarded in the article. This of course runs the risk of igniting a shouting match between the two institutions which is something we want to avoid. However the meetings, conferences and training sessions for club committees which are coordinated by both UBU and SEH are continuously being developed by both parties. We may both be separate

institutions which operate in different ways but ultimately we work to support the student body. And that’s the student body as a

whole. Not to simply focus on sports or sports hall users or top BUCS scorers. In the last few weeks, with various issues arising around

Both UBU and SEH need to work together to benefit the entire student body

the AMM, it seems that open ears and respect for the student body, who we are both trying to support, is essential.

Epigram

18.02.2013

Sport

Editor: David Stone

Deputy Editor: Laura Lambert

sport@epigram.org.uk

deputysport@epigram.org.uk

@epigramsport

Inside Sport

Bristol sail through to BUCS Team Racing Finals

BUCS success for Cross Country The other week saw 42 members of Bristol University Cross Country club travel up to Leeds University to take part in the annual BUCS Cross Country Championships continued on page 34

Varsity defeat for Barracudas

Nigel Vick

Nicola Reid Sports Reporter After an excellent performance last year, Bristol’s Sailing Team had a reputation to uphold at the BUCS Wester Team Racing Qualifiers, held at the beginning of February at our local sailing club, Chew Valley Lake. BUCS is open to sailing teams of all levels from Universities all over the country, 34 of which entered this year’s event. Bristol entered three team racing teams into the mix of 79 teams from around the country; Red (1sts),

White (2nds) and Purple (3rds), which competed with 11 other teams at the qualifying event. The outcome of a seemingly tough competition was highly anticipated, due to the pressure felt by Bristol’s teams to uphold their victorious reputation. Bristol Purple, also known as the ‘Cupcakes’, were unfortunate to come last in the whole competition. However, Bristol’s two other teams made the most of the perfect sailing conditions on the first day of the competition. The sun was shining, providing ample sunbathing opportunities, and

the team was on form although Bristol Red narrowly missed the start of their qualifying race against the Cupcakes, the Cupcakes letting them win of course. Salvaging Bristol’s reputation, Bristol Red won all their races and Bristol White lost only to Exeter Red and Bristol Red, placing them third overall. Given recent team re-shuffling (Bristol White had never sailed in that formation before) and the many cancelled training sessions at the beginning of the year due to the snow, Bristol’s sailing team gave an impressive

performance. Both of the qualifying Bristol teams have skipped the next qualifying rounds, automatically gaining a place in the finals which will be held in Bristol on 3rd-5th April 2013, where they’ll be in competition with strong teams such as Oxford, Cambridge and Southampton, in a bid for the all-important title of BUCS Team Racing Champions.

A damaging 20-point first quarter was enough to see the UWE Bullets through to a 26-6 victory on a cold and damp Varsity day up at SGS Filton. The Bullets won through with a strong defensive performance that gave Bristol no way through all day. Cuda’s only score came in the 4th quarter from a surging 80-yard kickoff return from WR Toby Rickards. continued on page 35

Pirates hoping to secure league As Bristol Rovers announce plans for a new stadium on UWE’s Frenchay Campus, new manager John Ward will be hoping his side can avoid relegation this season and continue their upward trend in the near future. page 34

Plus - One Bristol student’s attempt to cycle from Vancouver to Washington -Time to start running the right way

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