The Express Tribune hi five - August 3

Ms AUGUST 3, 2014

ISSUE NO. 111

Eastern Regalia

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Adoption in Pakistan

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inside lifestyle —

The origins of henna

domestic goddess —

Chicken roast for the soul

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Section In-Charge: Sarah Munir Sub-Editor: Amna Hashmi

The melodious Tina Sani

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the buzz

Society’s disregard for a noble act by Mehreen Ovais At any given moment in Pakistan, there are millions of children orphaned or displaced due to poverty, crime, natural disasters or simply having nowhere to go. Since abortion is illegal and contraception is generally frowned upon, these unfortunate children are often discarded from society and grow up without families, shelter and education. They live on the streets, begging for food and water until they succumb to hunger. Numerous babies are abandoned by parents who are unable to support them — a welcome fate considering many of them are murdered upon birth. According to Shanaz Ramzi, the author of A Guide to Adoption, a local Edhi centre alone receives close to 20 children — mostly girls — every month, left crying in the cradles placed outside the premises for this very purpose. Due to a lack of awareness and fear of social pressures, most parents in Pakistan turn a blind eye to the idea of adoption being a viable alternative to murder or abandonment.

It is rather ironic that in a country with such a large population of youngsters living on the streets, little has been done to offer them support. Adoption in Pakistan is not illegal but there exists no stringent legal framework to regulate adoption procedures.

At present, the Guardians and Wards Act of 1980 is the only legal standpoint taken to discuss adoption cases and while a petition is rarely ever declined, the adopting parents are not recognised as parents.

They remain legal guardians of the concerned child which leads to further logistic issues post-adoption, such as obtaining proper identification from NADRA. Moreover, in the absence of law, there are no legal rights given to the adopted child and no one to ensure he or she is treated right.

This gap is somewhat bridged by non-governmental organisations (NGOs) and private adoption agencies like the Edhi Centre, Kashan-e-Atfal, SOS Village and Imkaan Welfare Organisation. According to national reports, the Edhi Centre alone is giving over 250 children in adoption every year, closing in on a grand total of 23,320 babies adopted since it began. The problem, however, is the shortage of such well-reputed and trustworthy organisations to which adopting families can resort to without

According to national reports, the Edhi Centre is giving over 250 children in adoption every year, closing in on a grand total of 23, 320 babies adopted since it began having to worry. The Karachi Adoption Resource Centre provides counselling before, during and after the adoption process and bring adopting families and their desired children closer. Unfortunately, the management reserves the right to hold the children within its own premises rather than trust others with the responsibility. Consequently, families looking to adopt a child have to wait for months — sometimes years — until they are finally matched to and approved for a baby. Aspiring parent Adil Qureshi, for example, has been trying to adopt for over a year now but to no avail. “When my wife and I decided to go down the adoption route, it didn’t take long to realise the serious lack of information and resources in Pakistan,” shares Adil. “Usually, all one needs to do is visit a local adoption agency, submit an application and sit for an evaluation interview.

Once you are approved, you are placed in line for a baby that matches your profile and unfortunately, the line is often extremely long.”

It is therefore, unsurprising that adoption has benefitted few in Pakistan. This is made all the worse due to social pressures of having male children, preferably those below the age of two.

Tahera Hasan, director of the Imkaan Welfare Organisation and lawyer for national and international adoption cases shares that the older a children get, the rarer adoption becomes. “We find that older children are left in orphanages as amanat (keepsake) for short periods of time, when their parents find themselves unable to keep them at home,” says Tahera. “This can be due to anything from poverty or drug addiction or even having to serve jail time. The parents often come back to

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THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, AUGUST 3, 2014

Adoption is extremely difficult, especially in a society such as ours which is dominated by kinship, baradaris and ethnic divisions. Many adopting parents hide their child’s background to protect it from social and psychological issues that may arise later Aspiring parent Adil Qureshi visit or take their children home later on.”

Unfortunately, since most abandoned children are female, the wait for the right baby is stretched even further. As quoted in an article by Alefia T Hussain, “Because of the narrow-mindedness of our people, there is an obvious reluctance to adopt an orphan, stranger or non-relative,” says philanthropist Bilquis Edhi. “People prefer blood relations most of the time.”

“Adoption is extremely difficult, especially in a society such as ours which is dominated by kinship, baradaris and ethnic divisions,” explains Adil. “Many adopting parents hide their child’s background to protect it from social and psychological issues that may arise later. In fact, in most cases, adoption is usually shunned in favour of second marriages, quackery treatments or a niece or nephew.” One could argue that concealing the origins of adopted children is justified, especially considering the fact that their medical history is largely unknown. Treatments and testing may prove long and expensive, an additional cost to the greater process as a whole.

Many like businessman Ghulam Ahmed Bashir have kept their adopted child a secret lest they be denied basic family rights. “I was afraid my son would be denied his share in the family wealth,” confesses Ghulam. This sheds light on another key issue that arises when one is considering adoption — inheritance. Many aspiring parents are discouraged from adopting due to the misconception that adopted children are not entitled to any inheritance of the family wealth. Sarah Haider, founder of the Pakistan Adoption Group, answers these fallacies.“Parents can bequeath up to one-third of their total estate to non-inheritors,” she says.

“This often results in the adopted receiving more than the biological children but I believe this exists to give the adopted one more financial security.” In any event, the amount of wealth the adopted child inherits depends on the wisdom and discretion of the family.

With such grave roadblocks on the way to successful adoption, it is no wonder people are apprehensive of bringing someone

else’s child into their homes. Often, they avoid the lengthy legal battles by resorting to informal arrangements for abandoned children, such as with local clinics, midwives and even their domestic help. Samreen Abbas and her husband, for instance, asked their maid for her son upon hearing she did not intend to keep him. “We jumped at the idea because it was easy and convenient,” shares Samreen. “There was a baby right in front of us, born to a woman we had known and trusted for years.”

Illegal methods of adoption are in fact, preferred due to the negative connotations Pakistani society associates with it. Once the child has been taken in, many couples like Aisha Saud and her husband pretend to be the biological parents to avoid social baggage. “I adopted two girls and both times, I pretended to have moved to the US for my pregnancy,” confesses Aisha. “We introduce the girls as our biological offspring so that they do not lose out on good marriage prospects and a happy future when they are older.”

Dr Rakshanda Talat, a gynaecologist from Faisalabad lends credence to such underground adoption practices, She admits to she receiving many patients with unwanted pregnancies who she refers to aspiring parents unofficially. “Most of these families are former patients of mine, some of whom can’t conceive or simply don’t want to,” says Rakshanda. “They put in a request for me to find them a child. I understand that this is not legal but the way I see it, a baby’s life can be saved. Not to mention, a couple without children of its own gets a chance at parenthood.”

It is the people of Paksitan opened up to a concept as noble as adoption. Not only is it the best answer to the ever-increasing problems of child abuse, child labour and poverty but adoption also possesses the power to change the fate of underprivileged children for the better. Organised efforts by both public and private entities such as social workers and lawyers etc, are needed to set up a smooth and transparent adoption process. This way, we can connect hopeful parents with unfortunate children and offer both healthy family lives. *Names has been changed for privacy

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en vogue

Deepak Perwani showcases his luxurious new eastern wear

Coordination: Umer Mushtaq Hair & Makeup: Nighat Misbah @ Depilex Designer: Deepak Perwani Photography & Styling: Haseeb Siddiqui Model: Sadaf Kanwal

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, AUGUST 3, 2014

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, AUGUST 3, 2014

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lifesyle

by Iram Moazzam

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, AUGUST 3, 2014

This year Eid-ul-Fitr has once again bought back with it the beautiful tradition of henna designs. Women across the subcontinent indulge in decorative henna tattoos (mehndi) on Eid, weddings and other festive events, rendering henna a symbol of celebration. But have you ever wondered just how henna became such a large part of our culture? Read on and find out.

Henna is actually a powder derived from crushing the leaves of the henna plant. The earliest use of this plant dates back to the Pharaohs in Egypt, some 9,000 years ago. Cleopatra, the last reigning queen of the ancient Egyptian civilisation is said to have used henna to adorn her body and beautify herself. Egyptians also used to paint nails of the mummies using henna before burying them.

Owing to its extensive history, henna as an art form has also got some superstitions attached to it. In India, it is believed that deeper the colour of henna on a bride’s hand, the better would be her relationship with the mother-in-law. In some places, it is also said to signify the strength of love between the bride and groom. Many traditional henna designs are secret symbols of prosperity, love, loyalty, fertility and good luck.

In the West, it is more popular as henna tattoos and women are sometimes seen with their pregnant bellies painted or heads adorned with henna designs while going through chemo therapy. Celebrities like Madonna, Liv Tyler, among others have been spotted adorning henna tattoos proudly in public

The henna cones that we pick off the market shelves are made for commercial use by adding chemicals to the paste. Homemade henna, on the other hand, is prepared by soaking the powder in the water and leaving it overnight. The colour of the fresh powder mix should be a vibrant deep green and the old powder may be slightly brown. The mixture is then applied to the body and left untouched for a couple of hours. When the paste is washed away, it leaves a beautiful orange-brown design that fades in a few days.

Generally, a darker shade of henna is often desired as it enhances the design made. Some companies add a dangerous chemical P-Phenylenediamine (PPD) to boost its colour.

Unfortunately, the chemical was voted Allergen of the Year by the American Contact Dermatitis in 2006 and may cause severe allergic reactions or blisters.

- Cooling agent during summer to relieve effects of the intense heat like sunstroke and headaches. Initially the use of henna was limited to soaking hands and feet in its paste to retain body temperatures in times of intense heat. Gradually, people started applying paste to the hands, feet and arms with fingers and the designs were made with the aid of tiny twigs or toothpicks.

- To treat various types of skin problems like ringworm, athletes foot etc.

- Effective in treating cracking nails.

- A considerable number of women use it as a substitute for nail polish which doesn’t require a nail polish remover.

- The bark of the henna plant is known to be effective in the treatment of jaundice and some diseases.

- Apart from its dyeing properties, the constant use of henna softens and strengthens hair and adds shine to it. It also acts as a natural remedy for hair loss. With its amazing ability to retain the pH balance of the scalp, henna naturally and effectively cures dryness, dandruff as well as premature graying of hair. Afshan Naqvi, a hair stylist and beautician from Multan says, “Even though there are high quality hair dyes available in the markets, natural products are irreplaceable. Henna is free from all sorts of chemicals and it is best to dye your hair with it if the colour suits you. It keeps the head cool, kills lice and gives a radiance no chemical dye can.” Saleha Mumtaaz, a grandmother from Lahore who has been using henna as a substitute of hair dye from the past 20 years shares a useful tip: “While preparing mehndi for the hair dye, I always add a spoon full of coffee and a cup of black tea to kill the reddish color and deepen the maroon shade.”

- Today henna comes in cone-shaped tubes to make intricate designs. This ancient art of hand, feet and arm decoration now consists of thousands of designs including paisleys, geometrical or floral.

domestic goddess 7

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, AUGUST 3, 2014

Recipe

Rotisserie Chicken If you love chicken then this delicious roast is ideal for you!

Method

Seemi Aamir is a part-time teacher and mother of three who spends much of her free time trying out new recipes and creating her own

• Combine all ingredients in a small bowl, add water and mix thoroughly until a paste is formed.

• Construct balls out of aluminium foil and place the balls at the bottom of the cooking pot. Lightly spray the inside of the pot with cooking spray.

• Rub the spice paste onto the chicken and place it in the pot, on top of the foil balls.

Ingredient:

• Cover the pot and cook the chicken on low heat for six to seven hours. You can also increase the heat and cook for 3 to 4 hours.

• Serve with a side of roasted potatoes and vegetables.

Broiler/fryer chicken (3 — 4 lbs) 1

Paprika 2 tbsp

Black pepper (grounded) ½1/2 tsp

Aluminium foil

Cayenne pepper 1/2 tsp

Garlic cloves (diced) 3 or garlic powder 2 tbsp

Onion powder 1 and ½1/2 tsp

Salt 1 tsp

woman of the week 8

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, AUGUST 3, 2014

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