The Express Tribune hi five - June 15

Ms JUNE 15, 2014

ISSUE NO. 104

Simply Luxe

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The Gold Standard Is artificial jewellery for you?

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inside Father’s Day Special Celebrating the most cherished man in our lives

domestic goddess —

Death by chocolate

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Section In-Charge: Sarah Munir Sub-Editor: Amna Hashmi

The Yoga Guru Salina Taqi

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the buzz

The Gold Standard THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

Are heavy adornments an indication of your taste and stature?

by Iram Moazzam It is common knowledge that a South Asian wedding is incomplete without ostentatious amounts of jewellery on display. Whether it is a part of the bride’s wedding trousseau, her mother’s designer outfit or gifts exchanged between the families, jewellery is an important aspect of any wedding. In fact, one might argue that today’s wedding functions are but an opportunity for the affluent to show off their wealth, jewellery being the main outlet. Teekahs, jhoomars and thick sets of sonay ki chooriyan are just some things without which the bride wouldn’t look like a bride. After all, what would the larkay-waalay think if their bahu wasn’t adorned in the latest jewels from head to toe?

The past few years have experienced a shift in our cultural obsession with heavy wedding jewellery. As the global gold prices skyrocket, along with the other costs related to a wedding function, many women are now switching to silver or artificial, gold-plated jewellery for themselves. “What is the point of spending so much money on real jewellery when you can have the next best thing for so much cheaper,” says Sultana Khursheed, who is firmly against the concept of overspending on wedding jewellery. “I married off two daughters and both of them wore artificial sets on their weddings. No one can tell the difference!”

If constructed well, artificial jewellery can be hard to distinguish from genuine pieces.

Jewellery expert Farrukh Asmat Artificial jewellery is the term used to describe jewellery made out of inexpensive, mass-produced materials and semi or non precious metals. Local bazaars are teeming with artificial bridal and non-bridal sets, being sold at surprisingly low prices owing to the inexpensive materials used in their making, such as beads, synthetic stones and base metals. Lucite, crystals and zirconia are some of the common elements used to make artificial jewellery.

Often referred to as costume jewellery, this type of jewellery comes in a large variety of designs, styles and colours to suit different tastes. “This is what makes artificial jewellery so convenient,” continues Sultana. “You can switch your designs in accordance with the latest fashion trends whereas real jewellery can’t be replaced so easily.” Costume jewellery pieces also require little care. Should the set begin to change colour, a quick polishing can reverse the effects.

What adds to the rising demand is the lack of safety in Pakistan, where stories of robberies and muggings are rife. Rubaab Akmal, a homemaker from Islamabad shares her experience saying that, “After I was robbed of the gold I received on my wedding; I decided never to invest in real jewellery again. At the most, I invest in gold-plated silver jewellery with real stones and that is good enough. No one can tell the difference!”

Munazza Zia from Karachi agrees. “After I moved to Karachi with my husband, the first thing we did was get a locker in a nearby bank to keep my jewellery in. It’s been five years since and I have hardly even visited my locker! If need be, I just put on a pair of artificial earrings or a necklace to complete my look.” One must note that lockers are difficult to obtain nowadays, attainable largely via reference only.

Despite the current jewellery trends, however, there are many like Begum Arjumand who firmly believe in the appeal of real jewellery, saying, “Sona tau sona hee hota hai.” A grandmother from Faisalabad, Arjumand would settle for nothing less than real jewellery to send her granddaughter off. “Gold, diamonds and other gems are all investments for bad times,” she explains. “They can be liquidated instantly should the need arise. Not to mention, real jewellery acquires a certain sentimental value when one saves up to buy it or when a particular piece is passed down from one generation to another.” Perhaps that is why Arjumand gifted a maatha patti

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THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

What is the point of spending so much money on real jewellery when you can have the next best thing for so much cheaper Homemaker Sultana Khursheed from her own wedding to her granddaughter, earlier this year.

“If constructed well, artificial jewellery can be hard to distinguish from genuine pieces,” says Farrukh Asmat, an expert who runs her own jewellery business from home. “The visual appearance of the precious metal is apparent on the surface which, if examined closely, can reveal its true quality.” Farrukh warns against the shortcomings of artificial jewellery, explaining that the coating on the metals can be scratched off easily, revealing copper, nickel or other low-end materials which do not fall in the category of precious metals. “Also, the polish is more likely to come off or fade much earlier in artificial jewellery than real. Some of these materials can irritate the skin and cause rashes as well,” adds Farrukh.

There is a social stigma surrounding most wedding-related fashions. “Log kiya kaheinge” encourages many families to spend copious amounts of money on branded outfits and grand jewellery sets that are more for showing off than financial security. Newlywed Saira Lodhi had to purchase authentic jewellery against her will, simply because her mother-in-law was wary of how her friends would react to artificial jewellery. “Personally, I would have preferred spending my money on my new home rather than buying gold which I have left in my bank locker,” confesses Saira. “But I can’t deny that Ammi was right. I remember several women came up to me at my wedding to have a closer look at my jewellery.

Some of them even asked me how many tolay my bangles weighed, right there on stage! I would be lying if I said I wasn’t happy with my real set at that time.”

The custom of dowry that is prevalent across Pakistan adds to the pressure.

“Contrary to popular belief, dowry isn’t just for the bride,” explains Naureen Qamar Ali, a jewellery enthusiast from Karachi. “It includes gifts for both the bride and the family she is going to. Many people actually ask for genuine, expensive things like cars and electronic appliances. My susraal asked that the jewellery I bring be completely real and my parents had no choice but to comply.” Of course, this increases the financial burden on the bride’s family who, more often than not, have to finance the wedding festivities as well. “It is unfair but the larki walay have no choice in the matter,” says Sultana. “Family feuds over dowry are a common occurrence, especially in rural Pakistan. Parents of the bride usually try to avoid such issues by accepting demands.”

The decision regarding what kind of jewellery to invest in depends largely on the taste and financial standing of the buyer. According to Farrukh, the quality of artificial jewellery varies from one retail outlet to another. “Where you purchase your material from can determine its quality greatly,” she explains. “Some big brands now offer beautiful, high-quality costume jewellery, complete with intricate detailing and semi-precious stones, etc. On the other hand, local malls offer low-end pieces which are much cheaper, not just in price but in quality as well.”

Regardless of whether one’s jewellery is genuine or not, what is important is that it should be pleasing to the eyes and comfortable to wear. “Comfort is crucial, especially when it comes to bridal jewellery,” advises Farrukh. “It will not matter if the set is real or artificial if you the wearer is constantly fidgeting with it.”

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en vogue

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

The Luxury

Collection Samreen Haider’s exquisite new wedding formals

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THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

Model: Falak Sheikh Designer: Samreen Haider Make-up: Beenish Pervez Photography: Shani Snapper Coordination: Thomas Fernandes

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Father’s Day Special

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

For Your Father, by Teenaz Javat

The important role fathers play in a child’s upbringing

It just seems like society has somewhat accepted fathers are secondary and so, fatherhood isn’t heralded with the same vigour. I wonder, does paternal love not warrant celebration? Do our fathers not deserve the same appreciation as our mothers?

A little over a month ago, I visited the Looney Bazaar here in Toronto to purchase a Mother’s Day card for my mother. The store here always has the right merchandise to echo my sentiments. Although my parents are fairly tech-savvy, judging from their avid presence on various social media websites and applications, I much prefer mailing them a card back home to India the old fashioned way.

Last week, I went back to the store in search of a Father’s Day card that would effectively convey my love from across the world. Instead, what I got was heaps and heaps of graduation and prom-related paraphernalia, with just two small rows dedicated to fatherhood. The attendant there must have gauged my confusion as she went on to tell me the store had purposely reduced its inventory as few people celebrated Father’s Day nowadays. I paid for my card and walked out, wondering what wrong the fathers of the world had done to deserve this. Is it just that there are fewer fathers out there or are they simply not appreciated anymore?

“It’s another Sunday brunch for us,” says homemaker, Maheen Karim of her family traditions. “We have never really celebrated it much. My husband and I go out for brunch on Sundays anyway and on Father’s Day, we just let our children tag along.”

Such nonchalance towards Father’s Day is unsettling, especially considering the troubles its founder Sonora Smart Dodd underwent for its establishment. Having lost her mother at the tender age of 16, Sonora – the eldest of five siblings – realised early on the continuous struggle and hardship her widowed father had to face to raise their family.

Watching him play the role of both mother and father and making endless sacrifices made Sonora appreciate the important role father’s play in the lives of their children. Perhaps that is why she felt so strongly about the lack of a special day dedicated to honouring fatherhood.

It was a Mother’s Day sermon that Sonora attended in 1909 which

encouraged her to propose the idea of Father’s Day. As the mature and loving daughter of a devoted father, she wondered why no one paid much heed to paternal love while mothers were celebrated across the world. Thereafter, she began her campaign to get all fathers their due respect in society. With the help of local pastors, Sonora conveyed her idea to the local Young Men’s Christian Association (YMCA). Fortunately, the locals in her homes state of Washington were quick to endorse the idea. Although Sonora had suggested her father’s birthday, June 5, for the celebrations, local pastors deferred it to the third Sunday of June to get ample time to prepare their sermons. Thereafter, Father’s Day gradually spread across America, beating national hesitation and ridicule regarding the concept. It wasn’t until 1966 when former US president Lyndon Johnson declared Father’s Day an official celebration.

It is a pity that even now, over a century later, things haven’t changed much. Stories of great mothers are not hard to find, whether it is single moms raising their children alone or a career-oriented women giving up their ambitions to care for their families. Celebrations of maternal love are everywhere, in contrast to Father’s Day which translates into little more than two corner shelves with a few shabby greeting cards and ‘Best Daddy’ mugs on display. Granted that no love is greater than maternal love, it just seems like society has somewhat accepted fathers are secondary and so, fatherhood isn’t heralded with the same vigour. I wonder, does paternal love not warrant celebration? Do our fathers not deserve the same appreciation as our mothers?

Perhaps Father’s Day ought to be less celebrating and more about understanding the vital role a father figure plays in a child’s life. Research indicates that children with involved fathers are much more successful academically as well as in the professional world as paternal love encourages drive and ambition. Additionally, higher self-esteem and better social development are some of the qualities found in children with fathers who are engaged in their daily lives, as opposed to those who grow up without fathers. Considering this, it is safe to say that there is much more to fatherhood than simply providing financial support and shelter to the family.

“I think the problem is that Mother’s Day and Father’s Day – any special day, for that matter – are typically emotional in nature, something which isn’t usually associated with the male gender,” says Asim Waheed, a father of two. “Men don’t care much for gifts and flowers, etc so people don’t usually bother. My own children go all out for their mother on Mother’s Day but often forget about Father’s Day completely. I don’t mind though. And I don’t think other fathers do either.”

Fortunately, there are still plenty like Mehreen Bhaijiwala for whom Father’s Day remains special; a celebration of fatherhood that comes from the heart. Last year, Mehreen constructed a photo album with pictures of her husband playing with their 2-year-old son Mikail as a Father’s Day gift. “After presenting the album, we drove to my father’s house for a delicious family brunch.” After all, this is what such holidays are all about: family bonding and celebration.

domestic goddess 7

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

Recipe Hungry for some desert? This chocolate mousse is the answer to your prayers!

Chocolate Mousse

Method • Beat the egg yolk thoroughly and set it aside.

• Whip the egg whites.

• Gradually add the icing sugar to the egg whites and beat until it forms a peak.

• Heat the cream in a saucepan and add in the chocolate. Cook the mixture until the chocolate melts completely. Take the saucepan off heat.

• Add the beaten egg yolks into the chocolate mixture, stirring continuously.

• Add the egg whites and keep stirring.

• Allow the mixture to cool.

• Pour the mousse into serving glasses or bowls and refrigerate for one to two hours before serving.

Gulnaz Mondegarian is an expert in Iranian cuisine who has co-hosted Food Diaries alongside Zarnak Sidhwa to celebrate Community Food Week

Ingredient:

Heavy cream 1 cup

Icing sugar 1 tbsp

Eggs (separated) 2

Dark cooking chocolate 6 oz

woman of the week 8

THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, JUNE 15, 2014

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