Ms NOVEMBER 10, 2013
ISSUE NO. 73
A Splash of Style
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The Real Housewives of Pakistan
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inside unwind —
Whats hot and happening
domestic goddess —
Sheer caramel goodness
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Section In-Charge: Batool Zehra Sub-Editor: Amna Hashmi
The Guitar Hero
2 Ms
the buzz
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
Just a : e f i w e s Hou Trials of a i n a t is k a P r e k a m e hom
by Iram Moazzam
Ms T looks into the routine of the average Pakistani housewife and why she might be scorned for being one
6:00 am 11:00 pm Finally, everyone is asleep — even Shakir! Dinner was a success and for once, Ammi didn’t pass any negative comments about Aliya’s cooking. Dazed and exhausted, Aliya gets into bed and shuts her mind off for the rest of the night — or at least until Shakir wakes up yet again. And to think her husband feels she just sits on her bum all day! If only he realised the countless chores being a housewife involves and the attention to detail each requires. Maybe then will he learn to appreciate Aliya’s efforts.
5:45 pm Aliya silently laments over her life as Shakir screams at the top of his lungs, refusing to sit still in her arms. It is evening time already, her husband is on his way home and she hasn’t even had a second to squeeze in a quick shower. Once the kids completed their homework, it truned that the home printer was out of ink and Aliya had to rush to the stationary store to have them printed on time. And now with her husband on his way back from work and dinner to be served soon, a shower seems highly unlikely.
Aliya groans as her alarm strikes 6, piercing the eerie morning silence with a ring so shrill, it could probably wake the dead. Reluctantly, she opens her eyes and puts the devilish ringer off lest baby Shakir wakes up yet again. She has had a very long and troublesome night, trying to put him to sleep during what seemed like the worst of his colic fits and all she wants is to sleep for just five minutes more. “But who will send kids to school then?” she wonders, rising from her bed like a war-weary soldier and heading to the bathroom for the first (and last) few minutes of ‘me time’ she will get for the day.
The Scenario 1:30 pm The house is clean, food is ready and Ammi and Abbu have been given their medications and put to bed for their afternoon naps. But the children are about to get back home from school so Aliya has no time to waste, especially now that Shakir is up and needs constant supervision. Rocking the baby on one arm, Aliya lays the table for lunch. The children arrive, have lunch and then sit down to complete their homework with their mother who is frantically trying to make Shakir burp. “Let mama put the baby to sleep and then come right back to help you study!” Aliya says to her other children. “Don’t worry about making any mistakes. Mama will fix everything.”
8:30 am The kitchen is bustling with activity as Aliya scurries from one corner to the other, hurriedly preparing breakfast once again — the older children have already been fed, dressed and shipped off to school and now it is their father’s turn. Asking the maid to supervise the stove for a bit, Aliya rushes up to tend to the two babies in her life. Thankfully, Shakir is still sound asleep but his daddy is up and about, in search of some ratty old shirt he needs for today’s business meeting. “I’ll get the shirt, you go have your breakfast,” says Aliya, knowing it is better to keep her husband away from the closets she so expertly organised. If only she could hide away in them for just a couple of minutes and shut her eyes, she would feel much better.
10:15 am It is now time for breakfast number 3 as Aliya’s saas and sussar finally wake up. Unfortunately, their arrival coincides with that of the cleaner’s and now Aliya will not be able to give her parents-in-law company at the breakfast table. “Sorry Ammi, Abbu! The maid will bring your porridge right out,” she informs them as she rushes up to the kids’ room where the cleaner is already at work. “Maasi agayi hai...” she adds, inwardly feeling like one herself. Really, when had life become so mundane?
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THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
The Problem Aliya’s example is representative of a large proportion of women in Pakistan who toil away the entire day, trying to make life better for their families but are not given due appreciation for it. Islamabad-based housewife Rabia Azeem complains, “Our husbands think we sit idle the whole day when the reality couldn’t be more different! I have seen many husbands who return from work and start pointing out the shortcomings of their wives, asking ‘Akhir tum saaray din karti kiya ho?’” If you can relate to Aliya, you would agree that it is high time women who choose to stay at home were appreciated for the full-time job of being a housewife, that too without any sick leaves, paid holidays and official timings. It is truly a pity that western society acknowledges the role of a housewife and encourages husbands and children to o share the daily household chores, a concept yet to come to Pakistan. “Running a home is difficult with or without children,” says Lahore-based homemaker Maham Rauf. “Ourr husbands go crazy if they are left alone with babies for a minute but never seem to realise the difficulties of having to do that through the day and night. Men in Pakistan need to understand that housewifery involves being moms, wives, daughters as well ass drivers, cooks, cleaners and teachers. It’s a full time job!” she adds, vehemently.
The Reasoning
Why does our society admonish women for staying at home and looking after their family? mily? Why do men, and even some women, criticize those who become homemakers for being ng lazy and unambitious? According to Moazzam Khan, “The society we live in gives more e importance to males from an early stage. The son is treated as the ‘ghar ka chiraagh’ who will earn for his family when he is older. The daughter is brought up to be a domestic goddess who can cook, clean and care for her susraal to perfection. But then, people start criticizing them for it. There appears to be two extremes wherein girls are either discouraged from seeking employment or condemned for being staying at home,” he adds. Twenty-six year old Emaan Haque take Moazzam’s view up a notch by suggesting that “The preferential treatment enjoyed by men makes them feel like they are superior or to women, that they do more work and are generally more useful than their female counterparts. Why else would the ‘ghar mein tau bethi ho’ issue arise?” While husbands are indeed the breadwinners and patriarchs of the household, many of them could never keep house efficiently and must realise the important contribution n women make to their lives. They may be the financial department of the house but women men lead the functional and support division, making sure everything stays in order. Perhapss we women should ask our husbands to put themselves in our shoes and imagine working ng for an employer that didn’t appreciate, let alone praise, their hardwork. Wouldn’t they feel overworked and crave recognition for their efforts? Would they not wish to just give up? p?
The preferential treatment enjoyed by men makes them feel like they are superior to women, that they do more work and are generally more useful than their female counterparts. Why else would the ‘ghar mein tau behti ho’ issue arise?
Job Description ome mom e wife / Stay-at-h Job Title: Hous Job Description: Nurse • Mom • Guard • Chef • Nanny • Tailor • Gardener • Alarm Clock • r Interior decorato • or ct tru Ins • Driver • Maid • Teacher • ES: None ANNUAL LEAV ne No : a week SICK LEAVES 24 hours/ 7 days 9 am to-5 pm S: UR HO NG t KI en WOR chores, infrequ reasing household Inc ?” N: IO ho AT kia hi ER rti REMUN m ghar may ka a lot of “Akhir tu appreciation and
The Solution What is worse than our husbands’ ignorance is that Pakistani women do not respect the idea of housewifery and so often sell themselves short, embarrassed of attaching the label of a housewife to their name. Many of us would sooner run in the opposite direction than answer to the dreaded ‘Do you work?’ which is most often followed by a rather hesitant ‘No, I am just a housewife.’ According to Emaan, “The word just gives a sort of self-deprecating vibe. Stay-at-home mothers must stop undermining themselves first. Only then will anyone else realise their worth.” As women and as housewives, we must realise that there is no shame in being a homemaker if that is what we want to be. At the end of the day, we do what we do out of love and not compulsion. As Rubina Waqar, a loving housewife, mother and grandmother from Lahore explains, “As housewives, we take on the responsibility of others’ lives and not just ours. We do it as our duty and out of love for our family. In return, we expect nothing but a little acknowledgement and appreciation and that is nothing to be ashamed of!”
4 Ms
en vogue
Splash away The international clothing company, Splash, comes to Pakistan with a fabulous collection of winter wear for men, women and children. Be sure to give the store a visit before all the great stock runs out!
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
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6 Ms
unwind
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
Weekly Detox
Do
Ms.T ’s recommendations for everything that is doing the rounds across the world. Make sure you give each a shot to stay in the loop! Ram-Leela
See There is no denying that 2013 has been a whirlwind of a year for everyone’s favourite Bollywood starlet Deepika Padukone, who has wowed fans the world over with her acting prowess in recent films like Race 2, Yeh Jawani Hai Deewani and Chennai Express. Riding high on the immense success enjoyed by each, Padukone is truly at the peak of her career currently. She will now be sharing screen space with Ranvir Singh in the upcoming Raam-Leela, a Gujarati adaptation of Shakespeare’s epic Romeo and Juliet, set in violent Gujarat. In true Sanjay Leela Bhansali fashion (we all remember Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, Black and Devdas, right?), Raam-Leela boasts of extensive sets, elaborate song and dance sequences and a palpable chemistry between the two lead actors. Releasing on November 15th, Raam-Leela promises to be an action-packed romantic saga so hit the theatres to catch this one for sure.
Read Bridget Jones — Mad about the Boy:
Have you been feeling unhealthy, tired or just generally low these days? It is an increasingly common complaint that we hear about ever so often at Ms T and so, decided to dedicate this space to helping you reset. How, you ask? With a good, weekly detox cleanse. Not only are many of us eating more than we should, the food that we do eat had often lost much of its nutrients in the cooking process and is packed with fat, oil and preservatives which affect our bodies adversely. A detox diet serves as a short-term cleanse of your body to rid you of the toxins that have been consumed and also gives plenty of additional nutrients which speed up their elimination from your body. Therefore, it is imperative for you to indulge yourself in a good detox at least once or twice a week to keep yourselves healthy from the inside. There are plenty of detox plans and ideas around ( you can make detox salads or smoothies and shakes as well) which are both quick and easy to do, so long as the fruits and vegetables you use are all fresh and natural. We cannot stress the benefits of a weekly detox enough so search for a plan that suits you, keep at it for a few weeks and we promise, you will see a brand new you!
Ladies, it is time for us to indulge ourselves and soak up that refreshing winter sunshine with a good book. Actually, make that a great book cause Bridget Jones — Mad about the Boy (MATB) is just that. When Helen Fielding first published Bridget Jones’ Diary, charting the life of the young, single and very much ready to mingle Bridget as she went from one romantic calamity to the other, Helen revolutionised the world of chick-lit, following up with an equally successful sequel called The Edge of Reason. The two books have even been translated into major blockbuster films starring the adorable Renee Zellweger as Bridget. Now, after making us wait for more than a decade, Helen is back to tickle our funny bones with MATB, her third instalment in the Bridget Jones trilogy. In MATB, we see a whole new phase of recentlywidowed, 51-yearold Bridget’s life in contemporary London, including the challenges of aging, social-networking problems and even fitting into skinny jeans. Bridget is still maintaining her diary, smoking uncontrollably, looking for love and is as hapless and prone to social disasters as ever. But we aren’t complaining because her shortcomings make for an uproariously funny read. MATB has already hit local bookstores so make sure you invest in your very own copy before they sell out.
domestic goddess 7
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
Recipe
Caramel Cupcakes Try my easy recipe for delicious caramel cupcakes and impress your friends and family with how good they taste. It doesn’t matter if you are a seasoned baker or a novice; I guarantee the sweet goodness of caramel will blow everyone away. Happy baking!
Method For the cupcakes: • In a large bowl, beat the sugar and butter together with an electric beater until they become creamy. • Add the eggs one by one, stirring constantly. • Pour in the milk and beat some more. • Once the milk has been absorbed completely, carefully add the baking powder and flour and beat once again. • Line a muffin tray with paper cups and pour the mixture into each cup. • Place the tray in a pre-heated oven and bake the cupcakes at 180 degrees for about 20 to 40 minutes. • As baking time varies from one oven to the other, make sure you keep a check on the cupcakes throughout, sticking a toothpick in to see if they have cooked or not. If the toothpick comes out clean, your cupcakes are ready. For the caramel sauce: • In a frying pan, melt the sugar until it turns a light brown colour. • In a separate cup or bowl, mix the milk powder and water into a thick paste and add the melted sugar to it. • Cook the paste on low flame until it gets and thickens. • Allow the mixture to cool in a refrigerator before pouring it over the cupcakes. Apply the caramel sauce on the cupcakes, store them in an air tight container and refrigerate for the sauce to settle. Decorate the cupcakes if you please and serve on a flat dish. Your cupcakes are now ready.
Arooj Waqar runs a Facebook cooking page called Mona’s Kitchen and aspires to convert her passion for cooking into a career
For the batter:
Butter 100 gms
Sugar (powdered) 1 cup
Eggs 3
For the caramel sauce:
Sugar 3 tbsp
Milk powder 6 tbsp
Water 5-7 tbsp
Milk ¾ cup
Flour 1 and a 1/2 cup
Baking powder 1 tsp
hottie of the week 8
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, NOVEMBER 10, 2013
Status Married Born Lahore, Pakistan Birthday 21st March, 1980 Face
85%
Ali Hamza
Body
80%
Who is he? At Ms T, we believe two is always better than one. Last week, we brought you Pakistan’s resident rocker Ali Noor and his groovy style. This week, we present the other half, the founding member and lead guitarist of Noori, Ali Hamza. Creative and a gifted guitarist, Ali burst onto the Pakistani media circuit back in 2002 with the release of Noori’s Suno Ke Mein Hoon Jawaan and made his way into our hearts with his cheeky grin, slapstick sense of humour witty interviews. His expertise at the guitar have been vouched for by thousands of fans across Pakistan as well as the international community. Ali spends much of his time travelling the world along with Noori, performing for Pakistanis abroad and promoting the music industry. Whether on a CD or performing live, Ali always gives his best shot to his music every time which is why Noori manages to make our hearts sway even 11 years down the line. Like we said last week, we may not be attending all Noori concerts but it’s okay so long as we can catch a glimpse of Ali’s goofy and ‘high on life’ persona on TV!
Talent
90%
Why we love him When it comes to Ali, there are very few things that are not absolutely loveable. An all around nice guy, Ali’s super cool temperament and vivacious personality comes across as genuine and effortless, bringing him closer to his fans as compared to other celebrities. In fact, Ali is so friendly that his idea of the perfect adventure revolves around anything that would involve him befriending people he has previously been at odds with! According to Ali, the most beautiful thing about life is life itself and he uses his own personal life experiences as inspiration for his music. Ali maintains a positive attitude towards himself and cares little for criticism and public opinion. A borderline workaholic, he spends much of his time commuting between work and home but the fun guy in him loves to travel. His favourite holiday destination is Kabul, Afghanistan.
What you didn’t know about him Ali’s favourite cuisine is Pakistani. One thing Ali despises is mindlessness in people and admits that he has little patience for it.
Total Package
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