San antonio current november 4, 2015 by Chava Communications

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4 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

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San Antonio Current

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Senior Editors: Bryan Rindfuss, Jessica Elizarraras Interim Art Director: Sarah Flood-Baumann Food & Nightlife Editor: Jessica Elizarraras Music Editor: D.T. Buffkin Staff Writers: Mark Reagan, Michael Marks Digital Content Editor: Albert Salazar Contributors: Ron Bechtol, Ainsley Caffrey, Erik Casarez, Murphi Cook, James Courtney, Jade Esteban Estrada, Dan R. Goddard, Lance Higdon, Steven G. Kellman, Kiko Martínez, Jeremy Martin, Jeff Meyers, Gary Sweeney, J.D. Swerzenski Editorial Interns: Rohit Chandan, Angelica Flores, Carlo Jagge, Gabriela Mata, James McCandless, Taylor Medrano, Shannon Sweet, Patricia Valdez

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IN THIS

FIRST WORDS

On “Mayor Ivy Taylor Says SAPD Has It Right on Immigration Procedures”// Loyd Hawkins: “As the federal government keeps reminding us, immigration enforcement is the job of the federal government, not local police departments. The federal government has much more in the way of resources than cities do.” On “Hotel Emma Sets Opening Date”// Rolando Guerra: “yay another hotel :rollseyes:” On “14 Images from This Morning’s Gun-free Campus Rally at UTSA”// Benjamin Garrison: “Regardless of your stance on this law, protesting it at UTSA is useless navel-gazing. The law as [sic] passed in Austin. Speak with your representative and go demonstrate in Austin during the next legislative session. Anything else is just shouting into the wind.” On “University of the Incarnate Word Briefly Locked Down after Reports of Gunman on Campus”// Seruh Ann: “This is scary. When this open carry law comes into effect how are we going to know who the bad guys are. When we will we [sic] know to lockdown? When they begin shooting?” • Send your thoughts, comments or kudos to letters@sacurrent.com

ISSUE

Issue 15_44 /// November 4–10, 2015

NEWS

Newsmonger Sanctuary cities, a gunman on campus and the Spurs drop the opener

SCREENS

Aziz of All Trades Aziz Ansari weighs in on modern techno-romance in Master of None

CALENDAR

Our top picks for the week

ARTS + CULTURE

Hello, Emma The Pearl’s boutique hotel is almost here Come and Fix It It’s unbelievable now, but the Alamo was once a wreck

Cussing Cousins Bad Jews is a sharp examination of family, identity

FOOD

Wrap Battle No awful falafel here Bánh Mì Tour The 20-Somethings find their favorite Vietnamese sammich

NIGHTLIFE

Pub & (Upscale) Grub Francis Bogside is a grownup playground you’ll love

Sizzlin’ Sandos Because who doesn’t love a good sandwich? Flavor File Lots of openings this November

MUSIC

Black and Tan Fantasy SA jazz club breaks racial barriers and hosts legends The Essential Ellington 6 musical examples of why Duke Ellington is a boss Ain’t Nothin’ but a G Thang Alex G speaks from the basement of his heart Brains and Bangers Brains and bangers with The Underachievers Music Calendar What to see and hear this week

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Gunning for It UTSA considers gun-free zones

Kingdom of Shadows Kingdom of Shadows brings human rights abuses to light

ETC.

Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Freewill Astrology This Modern World

ON THE

COVER The Granary’s pastrami sandwich and The Classic sandwich from Green Vegetarian Cuisine are but two in the plethora of sammies we feature in the Sandwich Issue. Photograph by Pete Morales. Art direction by Rick Fisher and Sarah Flood-Baumann

sacurrent.com • October 28–November 3, 2015 • CURRENT 9

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NEWS

• An alleged gunman was reported on the UIW campus Tuesday, but police didn’t find a suspect.

BEXAR-O-METER Checking the temperature of events in Bexar County and beyond

NEWSMONGER Sanctuary Cities, a Gunman on Campus and the Spurs Drop the Opener Sanctuary San Anto Is San Antonio a sanctuary city? It’s worth asking, since Gov. Greg Abbott is preparing to go to war with any municipality that doesn’t nose into the citizenship status of its residents. Abbott supports banning sanctuary cities in Texas and expects the state Legislature to do so in 2017. San Antonio hasn’t officially declared itself a sanctuary city, but it has the characteristics of one. San Antonio Police Chief William McManus clarified his department’s stance in a meeting of the City Council Governance Committee on Wednesday, October 28. McManus said that his officers don’t ask people about their immigration status. But if they arrest someone with a federal warrant who immigrated to the U.S. illegally, they’ll notify the feds. Mayor Ivy Taylor backs the approach, saying in a news release on the subject last week that “citizenship status is a federal matter and is not the role of our municipal police department.” “Our police department has to concentrate their efforts on answering service calls and ensuring the safest and best quality of life for our citizens,” Taylor said. “However, we will not harbor

SPURS START SEASON

MICHAEL MARKS/@MICHAELPMARKS

81-1 will suffice

criminals, nor will we protect them. What we will do is prosecute them, regardless of citizenship status.” Gunman at University of the Incarnate Word Reports of a gunman on campus rattled the University of Incarnate the Word on Tuesday, October 27. Campus police received several calls at around 5:40 p.m. Tuesday reporting an individual dressed in all black carrying two rifles. Law enforcement conducted a sweep of the campus but did not find a suspect. Although police told people on campus to stay put during the sweep, the university was not technically on lockdown, according to UIW Police Chief Robert Chavez. Chavez said that his department’s policy is to not institute a lockdown until they have confirmation of an active shooter. Students, faculty and parents have questioned that move, as well as the manner in which UIW disseminated information. Chavez said that he will reevaluate the department’s procedures. “This is something that we’re truly wanting to learn from,” Chavez said in a press conference. “We’re going to put things in place that make sense and that will help us in all these ways to protect our students.” The campus was locked down at around 1 a.m. Wednesday morning, when campus police received another report of an armed person on campus.

Review of security footage revealed that it was just a security guard. Spurs lose, but holy shit Kawhi Leonard The good news: Basketball is finally back in San Antonio! The bad news: The Spurs won’t be the first team in NBA history to go 82-0. The Spurs dropped their season opener to the Oklahoma City Thunder by a score of 112-106 on Wednesday, October 28. It was a tight matchup as the teams swapped leads throughout, but miscues in crunch time doomed the Spurs. But there were bright spots – or at least a bright spot – in the loss, namely small forward Kawhi Leonard. Spurs fans wondered in the off-season if the reigning Defensive Player of the Year’s offensive game would ever catch up to his defensive capabilities. If the first game is any indication, it has. Leonard dropped 32 points on the Thunder, netting 59 percent of his shots from the field. He was clearly the Silver and Black’s first option all night. And with newcomer LaMarcus Aldridge (11 points) still getting into the groove, the Spurs will need that kind of production from Leonard. “He’s done that the whole preseason, and he’s kind of morphed into that through his career. He’s a confident player now and has worked on his game diligently,” Spurs coach Gregg Popovich said after the game. “He’s arrived.”

CITY SENDS BIKE SURVEY Pee-wee would approve

BODY CAMERAS FOR SAPD Let’s hope they keep them turned on

DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME ENDS Why is it so dark already?

ANOTHER GOP DEBATE At least there’s only a year left of this

EARLY VOTING ENDS Thanks to the six of you who voted

mmarks@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 11

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NEWS

GABRIELA MATA

GUNNING FOR IT

Will UTSA implement gun-free zones on campus? MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN

When Texas’ legislators pulled the trigger on campus carry, they didn’t realize that the day they scheduled the law to take effect is the 50th anniversary of the University of Texas at Austin mass shooting. On August 1, 1966, deranged murderer Charles Joseph Whitman climbed the UT Tower and shot and killed 14 people while wounding dozens. Before targeting civilians, Whitman murdered his wife and mother. On August 1, 2016, a controversial campus carry law will allow concealed handgun licensees to bring their guns on public university campuses, much to the dismay of a large contingent of education professionals and students alike. Ruth Heide Claire James, who was known as Claire Wilson nearly 50 years ago, is a survivor of the 1966 massacre. She has repeatedly told multiple media outlets that armed civilians on campus who engaged Whitman did not help the situation. Instead, they caused confusion, prolonging law-enforcement rescue efforts. “Police are trained to handle this type of situation. I’ve heard from the police that stopped [Whitman] that day that [the armed citizens] actually made the situation more dangerous and put the people who were trying to save us at risk,” she told the Austin American-Statesman in 2013. The specter of that shooting five decades ago serves as a backdrop for the UT System as its campuses are creating plans that may include gun-free zones for submission to the regents, who will then vote on the proposals. A compromise in the law allows public universities to designate gun-free zones. However, campus carry advocates, like Antonia Okafor, southwest regional director and Texas state director of Students for Concealed Carry, can’t imagine how gun-free campuses could be safer than gun-saturated universities. Okafor claims Umpqua Community College, in Roseburg, Oregon, the site of a mass shooting in October that resulted in 10 deaths, prohibited concealed licensees from carrying handguns. “[That’s the] very reason why these criminals know they can come on campus and know they can go in buildings, classrooms and offices and be able to prey on people who are the most vulnerable,” she said. “That’s the compromise itself, the exclusionary zones. I’m just hoping the administration making decisions sees excluding is counterproductive to the intent of the law and that students are empowered and able to defend themselves.” However, the Oregon community college was not a gunfree zone and at least one concealed handgun licensee told media he did not try to engage the shooter — who had way more firepower than him, by the way — because he didn’t want to be mistakenly targeted by law enforcement.

•

Kevin Hernandez, co-founder of Students for Gun Awareness, protests campus carry at UTSA.

None of this sits well with professors Walter Wilson and Ritu Mathur, faculty with the Department of Political Science and Geography at UTSA. “Guns and learning don’t mix,” Wilson said, while setting up for a rally against campus carry at the downtown UTSA campus last week. “One of the most fundamental things that we need on a campus in order to promote good education is an ability to have spirited discussions and those need to happen in safe environments where nobody fears retribution for making arguments and challenging one another.” For Mathur, the language in question — gun-free zones — is in itself a troubling reflection of an over-militarized society. “The whole thing is also, in a sense, when you are talking about these exclusion zones, you are trying to normalize militaristic culture around a university,” Mathur said. “There’s a particular taboo about weapons. There’s a reason it’s existed for centuries.” One of Mathur’s specialties is international humanitarian law, a field of study that includes creating exclusionary zones, but not on college campuses, rather, in theaters of war for the safe evacuation of civilians out of combat zones. “This is a university. This is not even a war zone,” Mathur said angrily. Nonetheless, UTSA will submit a plan to the regents that will probably include gun-free zones — and “war” between second amendment advocates and educators who want to keep weapons out of learning environments will continue to be contentious, but only one side will be packing heat.

CAMPUS CARRY TIMELINE September 2015 • UTSA convenes campus carry task force. Nov. 1, 2015 • Task force makes recommendations to UTSA leadership. Dec. 4, 2015 • UTSA submits preliminary campus plan to UT System for review. Dec. 11, 2015 • UT System provides feedback about plan to UTSA. Dec. 18, 2015 • UTSA submits final plan to UT System Board of Regents for review. Feb. 10, 2016 • UT System Board of Regents convenes and reviews UTSA and other campus carry plans. Feb. 15, 2016 • UTSA begins plan implementation. July 1, 2016 • UTSA installs physical improvements, completes campus signage. Aug. 1, 2016 • Campus Carry takes effect. SOURCE: UTSA

mreagan@sacurrent.com

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CALENDAR

MATTHEW MURPHY

WED

Brad Mehldau Trio MUSIC

As a soloist, pianist Brad Mehldau leaves no key unturned, exploring the keyboard in his dense and dripping portraits in jazz. The 45-year-old continues in the path of Philadelphia great McCoy Tyner with a remarkable independence between his hands, as if two deft, single-handed musicians were simultaneously riffing at the piano bench. But Mehldau is also a great communicator, sparring with his longtime trio of bassist Larry Grenadier and drummer Jeff Ballard to explore the jazz canon and beyond, from a cover of Oasis’ “Wonderwall” to “The Brady Bunch Variations for Piano and Orchestra.” $29-$110, 7pm, Aztec Theatre, 104 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 812-4355, theaztectheatre.com. — Matt Stieb

16 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

THU

Bomba Estéreo MUSIC

In their first decade together, Bogotá’s Bomba Estéreo has perfected an infectious fusion of Afro-Colombian folk music and trippy electronica, nabbed the title of “Best New Band in the World” (courtesy of MTV Iggy) and emerged as a mainstay on the American festival circuit. Seemingly without trying, they’ve also remixed the tired concept of the “party band” — thanks in no small part to the wild synergy of vocalist Liliana Saumet and founder/ bassist/keyboardist Simón Mejía. The Texas-bred Pachanga Latino Music Festival brings the quartet to town on the heels of this summer’s beach-party soundtrack Amanecer. $20, 7pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com. — Bryan Rindfuss

THU

Puscifer MUSIC

If there’s one thing Maynard James Keenan is not particularly keen on (other than that pun), it’s people bringing up his legendary alt-metal act Tool when he’s trying to talk about his sophomoric comedy-rock troupe Puscifer, and with good reason. Though tracks on albums such as “V” Is for Vagina and Conditions of My Parole share a clear musical kinship to his previous projects, Puscifer’s raucous stage show — featuring a cast of characters like Major Douche and Peter Merkin — seems more influenced by Keenan’s time with performance art weirdos Green Jellÿ. $34.50-$375, 7:30pm, Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org. — Jeremy Martin

THU-TUE

5-10

The Phantom of the Opera

THEATER

Based on the classic novel Le Fantôme de l’Opéra by Gaston Leroux, The Phantom of the Opera follows a disfigured musical genius who haunts a Paris opera house and obsesses over a beautiful Soprano named Christine. It’s been 27 years since Andrew Lloyd Webber first unleashed this iconic half-masked phantom onto Broadway audiences, and now — more than 10,000 shows later — Cameron Mackintosh reimagines the original staging and design for a new generation in one of the largest productions to tour North America. $39-$154, 2pm & 7:30pm Thu, 8pm Fri, 2pm & 8pm Sat, 2pm & 7:30pm Sun, 7:30pm Tue, The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com. — Murphi Cook

CALENDAR

6-8

Medea

THEATER

For lovers of classical theater and the morbidly curious alike, The Classic Theatre presents the truly twisted yet strangely empowering Medea. Written by Euripedes, the Greek tragedy centers on the myth of Medea and Jason, wherein the former, scorned by the latter, exacts revenge by murdering her own children and “the other woman.” Cheery shit, right? In context, the actions taken by Medea reveal a deeply individualistic spirit and a kind of deliriously powerful sense of self-worth that proclaims: My life and liberty are more important than anything, even my kids. $10-$25, 8pm Fri-Sat, 3pm Sun, The Classic Theatre, 1924 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 589-8450, classictheatre.org. — James Courtney

SHERVIN LAINEZ

JULIÁN LEDEZMA

SIGGI RAGNAR FRI-SUN

SAT

Día de los Muertos Ball SPECIAL EVENT

Day of the Dead gets a dragtastic twist via local hairstylist Rene Roberts’ annual Día de los Muertos Ball. Drawing inspiration from Walter Hill’s dystopian cult classic The Warriors and its lawless armies of the night, this year’s BYOB affair encourages attendees to “come in skeleton face” for a wild evening uniting drag performers (Tencha La Jefa, Taryn Taylor, Sweet Savage and Sasha Andrews, to name a few), spoken-word artist Anthony the Poet and the SA Street Dance and Drum Co. To sweeten the deal, the adultsonly outing promises free food and Dos Equis beer. $35, 6pm-midnight (show at 9pm), Guadalupe Theater, 1301 Guadalupe St., (210) 324-2662, sanantoniodiadelosmuertosball.com. — BR

SUN

Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown FILM

Spain’s Pedro Almodóvar was known for low-budget, impudent, often gay-themed films when this candy-colored comedy marked his international art-house breakthrough — and it wasn’t bad for the careers of Carmen Maura or Antonio Banderas either. Maura’s heroine, reeling from being dumped by her boyfriend, mixes with several characters in crazy cross-purpose plotlines that include Shiite terrorist hijackings and spiked gazpacho before she gets her groove back. The McNay screens the Oscar-nominated gem in conjunction with its Spanishthemed This Is Not a Film Series. $15$20, 2pm, McNay Art Museum, 6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368, mcnayart.org. — Michael Barrett

MON

Of Montreal MUSIC

If you’ve been paying attention to popular music over the past 15 years, you’ve heard something or other about Athens, Georgia band Of Montreal. From its early days of quirky indie rock, to the postmodern disco jams that the outfit, led by mad genius Kevin Barnes, is perhaps most loved for, to its recent, comparatively staid, folk-rock output — the band’s sound never sits still and never ceases to challenge. One thing is certain, however: Few bands put on a better live show than Of Montreal. With its 13th studio album, the rad Aureate Gloom, out last March, the group has enough material to keep every show unique. $15, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St Mary’s St., papertigersa.com. — JC

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TheTexasKosherBBQChampionship.com 16550 Huebner Road 78248 | 210.479.0307(Corner of Huebner/Bitters) 18 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR NIGHTLIFE

WED

Juan Felipe Herrera

THU-SAT

Art

Art opening: “Domestic Turbulence”

Working between painting and drawing, artist and educator Jason Stout mines classical genres to explore contemporary concepts of interior and exterior space as well as political and personal narratives. Free, 6-9pm Saturday; REM Gallery, 219 E. Park Ave., (210) 224-1227.

Art opening: “How Handsomely You Dwell” Comprised of assemblages built

from objects found in thrift shops and garage sales, UTSA grad student Alyssa Danna’s MFA thesis exhibition reflects the artist’s aim to “beautify in a subversively complex way.” Free, 6-9pm ThursdayFriday; Terminal 136, 136 Blue Star, (210) 458-4391.

Art opening: “Retro Pro” R Gallery’s latest

combines a retrospective of artists who exhibited at The Peep Hole Art Gallery between 1996 and 2002 with a selection of progressive new works. The First Friday reception features live music from New Orleans-based DiNola and SA’s own Twenty Dollar Temple. Free, 6-11pm Friday; R Gallery, 725 S. Presa St., (210) 862-8875.

Art opening: “Tactile Memory” In her

exhibition “Tactile Memory,” Casey Galloway (co-owner of Wool Tree Yarn and interim fiber coordinator at the Southwest School of Art) brings together the processes of papermaking, weaving, crocheting, dyeing, and embroidery to examine “lost memories and internal change.” Free, 6-9pm Thursday-Friday; Hello Studio, 1420 S. Alamo St., Suite 106, (210) 291-8640.

Fashion Week

Anthony Ryan Reality television junkies may have already noticed a familiar face lurking in The Anthill, the new Stone Oak boutique owned by none other than Project Runway All Stars winner Anthony Ryan Auld. Known for his definitive shapes and bold fabric selections, the fan favorite saw the Alamo City as the perfect spot to finally set down roots after his whirlwind competition experience; now, he’s ready to wow his new hometown audiences with his premiere FWSA presentation, “The Darkness and the Light.” $25-$55, 7pm Friday; Showspace, 101 S. Santa Rosa St., (210) 784-1100.

Moda Next: Fashion’s Forthcoming

Launched in 2012 by Fashion Week San Antonio producer Tony Harris, the latest edition of the emerging designer showcase Moda Next unites the talents of Joey Ramirez, Valerie Perez, Christian Alonzo, Blanquita Sullivan, Bruno Horwath and FWSA newcomer Tessa Guerra. $25-$35, 7pm Thursday, Showspace, 101 S. Santa Rosa St., (210) 784-1100.

Samantha Plasencia From her first place

win at University of the Incarnate Word’s Cutting Edge Fiesta fashion show to a stint on Project Runway, designer Samantha Plasencia’s urban chic looks have consistently been in line with the fashion world at large. Constantly evolving, her upcoming collection combines her signature streetwear aesthetic with experiments in non-fabric materials for waterproofing and sustainability. $25-$55, 8pm Friday; Showspace, 101 S. Santa Rosa St., (210) 784-1100.

5-7

BLUE FLOWER ARTS

As the first Chicano/Latino U.S. Poet Laureate in history, Juan Felipe Herrera understands the marriage of song and social responsibility. His latest collection, Notes on the Assemblage, brings a sorrowful beat and a doleful swagger to subjects as urgent as the Black Lives Matter movement and the daily swell of atrocities weathered in Mexico. Linking themes as disparate as the LA Riots and avant-garde Italian cinema, Herrera seems to suggest that if there is a brotherhood out there, it is forged around the pangs of threat that compel people to unite and to incite. In conjunction with its Heritage Month programming, Palo Alto College welcomes the Fresno, California-based poet with an introduction by Texas Poet Laureate Carmen Tafolla and San Antonio Poet Laureate Laurie Ann Guerrero, to be followed by a reception, book signing, reading and discussion. Free, noon-1:15pm (introduction), 6-7pm (reception and book signing), 7-9pm (reading and discussion), Performing Arts Center, Palo Alto College, 1400 W. Villaret Blvd., (210) 4863000, alamo.edu. — Roberto Ontiveros

Muertitos Fest

Although it typically falls in line with Día de los Muertos itself and the array of local events it inspires, the 2015 edition of nonprofit arts program SAY Sí’s Muertitos Fest stretches the celebration through November 7. Following the theme “Tree of Life – Storytelling & Rituals,” the family-focused affair takes shape in three distinct components: a “Noche en Oaxaca” fundraiser with an exhibit of artwork, altars and trees of life created by students and featured artists Kathy Sosa and Veronica Prida, mezcal cocktails and “re-interpreted Mexican delicacies” from Viva Vegeria! ($35-$40, 7-10:30pm Thu); a First Friday fiesta with hands-on art activities, artisan vendors and live music and dance performances on two stages (free, 6-10pm Fri); and a Family Day with folk-art workshops, face painting and performances in the Black Box Theatre (free, noon4pm Sat). Prices vary, 7-10:30pm Thu, 6-10pm Fri, noon-4pm Sat, SAY Sí, 1518 S. Alamo St., (210) 212-8666, says.org. — Bryan Rindfuss

Theater

America’s Got Talent Live: The All-Stars Tour The NBC variety competition series’

first ever all-stars tour promises captivating performances by comedic Taylor Williamson, powerhouse vocalist Emily West, handbalancing duo The KriStef Brothers, “junk rock” performers Recycled Percussion and magician Smoothini. $30-$65, 7:30pm Monday; Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624.

PTSD and ME In observance of Veteran’s Day, the Overtime hosts a special performance of poet and writer Erika Renee Land’s one-woman show PTSD and ME, preceded by a presentation by fellow veteran Jules Vaquera. $15, 6pm Sunday; The Overtime Theater, 1203 Camden St., (404) 480-2740.

ZooZoo Filled with polar bears, bug eyes,

anteaters, frogs, rabbits, hippos and penguins, Portland, Oregon’s Imago Theatre’s kid-friendly ZooZoo combines mime, dance, music and special effects. $29-$110, 7:30pm Sunday; Aztec Theatre, 104 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 226-2891.

Bianca Sapet & The Indigenauts and a Selena sing-off featuring the likes of City Councilwoman Shirley Gonzalez and former Senator Leticia Van De Putte. $25$60, 6pm Friday; Guadalupe Theater, 1301 Guadalupe St., (210) 533-2729.

The Afterparty That Never Happened On

November 4 and 5, Sala Diaz and El Monty join forces for an evening of honoring bittersweet endings and celebrating the possibilities of new beginnings. Join friends in the Sala Diaz Compound to toast to The Monterey, to the late great Chuck Ramirez, to the past and the future. Buckle up, girl … this one is gonna be a doozy. Free, 6pm-2am Wednesday-Thursday; The Compound, 517 Stieren St., (972) 900-0047.

Día de Los Perros This family-friendly

fundraiser brings hundreds of dog lovers together for a pleasant afternoon of craft beers, great food, and a chance for people and pets to mingle, with proceeds benefiting SNIPSA’s spay and neuter program. $16$27, noon-5pm Saturday; The Cove, 606 W. Cypress St., (210) 227-2683.

Special Events

Tango of the Vines Swig a few Hill Country

wines, local craft beers and cocktails and nosh on bites from across SA while supporting the Amniotic Fluid Embolism Foundation. $60-$100, 7-11pm Friday; The Lambermont Estate, 950 E. Grayson St., (210) 362-0286.

Como La Flor Benefiting the P.E.A.C.E

Initiative, this multimedia Selena tribute combines an art sale and exhibit, a Selena look-alike contest, performances by Zombie Bazaar Belly Dance and

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 19

ARTS + CULTURE

, o l l e H mma

earl’s P e h t rived g last , At lon otel has ar h grand TOL

First Impressions When you walk up to Hotel Emma’s reception area, through the slate-gray gravel and naturally arranged flora, you start to feel as though you’re entering a unique place with an old personality and an authentic soul. You’ll glance at the massive outdoor fireplace to your left, you’ll look up at the restored façade of the towering old brewery and you’ll realize, before you’ve even walked in, that this place was built to exceed all of your expectations. Inside the reception area, as you step onto the vibrantly colored Redondo tile, patterned after the tile in the original brewmaster’s office, you encounter a reception desk that combines old-world charm with new-world sophistication. With a case showing off various industrial 20 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

NDF US S

• The aesthetic experience of Hotel Emma

B ECH

BR YA N RI

Checking In

RON

fter having survived the myriad delays that seem to plague any ambitious project these days, Hotel Emma at the Pearl is opening to the public on November 12. And it must be admitted that after 121 years — and a massive makeover of reality-show proportions, the old girl is looking pretty spiffy. Built as Pearl’s brew house by beer baron Otto Koehler, the building presented its unique challenges in transitioning from grain and hops handling to hospitality; the no-two-spaces-alike aspect makes for marvelously quirky room layouts, as a hard-hat tour about a month ago made clear, but it’s easy to imagine designers and builders being driven to distraction. Fortunately, the newly built annex housing additional rooms, suites and meeting spaces was construction of a more conventional sort — not that you’d immediately know that; the seamless transition between old and new has been skillfully managed. Without a staycation splurge, most of us won’t have occasion to spend the night in the gothic Hopper Suite underneath the brew house’s signature crown. We’ll also be missing the Dos Carolinas robes, the minibar thoughtfully stocked with local products … But we can take full advantage of the steampunk meets South Texas chic spaces that are open to the public — starting with the jaw-dropping lobby dominated by the ghosts of giant generators and lit by equally grand, bespoke light fixtures. There’s no room key required to visit the equally spectacular Sternewirth for a drink, to sit for a plate at Supper or to check out the displays of to-go provisions at Larder. Like Dolly Levi (the tenacious heroine of Hello, Dolly! ), we’re betting that this Emma “will never go away again.”

JAMES COURTNEY

trinkets of interest from the building’s past life, a massive repurposed mail-sorting shelf, and beautiful round lights that bathe you in a nostalgic yellow glow — there’s a feeling of unexpected glee upon walking in. Proceeding into the main lobby and lounge area, with The Library in front of you, stacked with tales of bygone intrigue, you’re called to marvel at the simple majesty of a large, old ammonia-filtering machine, front and center. It’s a quirky centerpiece, to say the least, but it’s strangely aweinspiring and serves to reinforce the same rich history as the rest of Emma. It all feels very South Texas — and it is — but you also can’t shake the feeling that it belongs, in scope and in value, to the whole world, as a celebration of culture and life itself.

ARTS + CULTURE

SUPPER

••••• Do not be deceived: Supper is also open for breakfast and lunch. I haven’t yet experienced the space at namesake night, but during the day it’s luminous, with pickled German chestnut floors, white porcelain-enamel panels and an array of schoolhouse lights all combining to create an airy atmosphere that suggests an equally light touch with cuisine. Accordingly, chef John Brand, most recently honcho of La Mansion del Rio’s kitchen, has created menus that are heavy only in thoughtfulness. Breakfast might bring delicate, dusted beignets or lemon ricotta pancakes; look at lunch to a pickled green tomato BLT, or roasted chicken with “simple roasted market vegetables.”

Dinner at Supper offers white anchovy beignets with dandelion salsa verde, sardines with fennel, celery and Dungeness crab, and venison loin with juniper and blueberry mustard. Brand was an early pioneer of provisioning from farmers markets, and now at Pearl he’s even closer to a significant source. But “we’re not trying to be totally farm-totable … the menu will evolve slowly with the seasons [and with chef-ly whim] but we won’t be confined to a ZIP code,” says Brand, who wants to be able to play with ingredients such as Wisconsin cheddar and Italian ricotta salata and spices such as sumac and the French/Indian blend vadouvan that aren’t part of the knee-jerk local canon. Insider tip: Reserve the banquette facing the open kitchen with its massive stainless and brass hood.

STERNEWIRTH

••••••••• Sorry Paramour: For one brief fleeting moment, you were the bar-belle with the most active dance card — and you still have the edge on views. But the eye doesn’t lack for places to light at Emma’s bar. From the giant fermentation tanks that have been converted to surprisingly intimate seating cubbies to arrangements of massive leather sofas astride oriental rugs and a bar whose top was fashioned from a preserved tree trunk unearthed at the site — or so the story goes — there is almost too much to take in. Best to come sit in a different place each time to get the full picture — and to concentrate every time on a cocktail menu put together by manager Mike McKinney (most recently at nearby Blue Box) and

===

The Library First things first: there’s a library in this hotel! And I’m not talking about some bland collection of 20-year-old travel books, cheesy romance novels and John Grisham paperbacks sitting next to a fake fireplace — this is a massive, impossibly far-flung collection of whimsical treasures of the intellectual and artistic variety. The Library, gorgeously appointed and blessed by warm light and the same rustic/refined, time-worn feeling as the rest of Emma, is actually the private collection of one Sherry Kafka Wagner. Of the 3,700-plus volumes indexed using an old-school card system, Wagner told the San Antonio Current that “so many of these books have been, for [her], the beginning of a journey.” In Wagner’s estimation, her “life really began when [she] started reading.” Something like a personal history in book form, The Library’s collection is as eclectic as the woman herself, who is a novelist, historian, Harvard Fellow,

cultural anthropologist, San Antonio enthusiast and so much more. In indexing the collection, she reports that “[her] life flashed before [her] eyes.” This gem of a space, an oasis and a launching pad, invites us all to peruse Wagner’s adventures and begin new ones of our own. The Rooms While many aspects of Hotel Emma are specifically designed in the hopes that locals will gravitate to the place on a regular basis to hang out, grocery shop, eat and drink, the unique rooms and suites, starting at around $350 a night, will no doubt be a tad more forbidding. The first thing to know about the rooms and suites, of which there are 135 and 11 respectively, is that no two are identical. This place, in general, flips a fancy middle finger to the kind of standardization that causes guests to have a “stay” rather than an “experience.” Each room shares certain elements, one of which is the minibar and fridge

CONTINUED ON PAGE 22 ►

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 21

ARTS + CULTURE

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE 21

his co-conspirator Jessica Lavalle. Expecting guests “from around the world,” McKinney says there will be more emphasis on service and consistency than “hey, we’re putting on a show.” To which Lavalle counters “but we also want personality — not robots.” Nevertheless, bartenders will wear uniform chef’s coats and dark jeans as they sling cocktails the likes of The Three Emmas, a gin-based, boozefueled drink based on an even juicier story of Otto Koehler, three women, infidelity and mayhem. Eschewing drama, chef Brand has put together a bar food menu of items that can actually be eaten while sitting on a deeper-than-Dixie sofa. Smoked dates with blue cheese and bacon fit that bill perfectly.

LARDER

••••• Mariah Lange’s local credentials include involvement in the late, lamented Oloroso (now Feast) and in running her own catering company. She says that she had long contemplated developing just the sort of gourmet provisions operation that is Larder — and now she has the full faith and credit of Emma behind her. Insofar as possible, says Lange, “We’re looking at local artisans [such as the makers of Shrub Drinks], regional stuff, thoughtful products with a backstory.” Part of her intended audience at the small but

Everybody I know wants Hugh Daschbach’s job — even if we can’t exactly define it. We all know that a conventional hotel concierge secures theater tickets, wrangles difficult restaurant reservations … but the culinary equivalent? Daschbach was one of Emma’s first hires, so he’s had some time to figure this out.

rooted in the history of our city and in the artifacts of the Pearl Brewery’s history. When the old building was gutted, all of the curios and implements found were moved to a warehouse, where designers could access them for inspiration and, in so many cases, repurposing. Jill Giles, whose firm Giles-Parscale worked on many divergent aspects of the project, including branding, fixtures, layout and even the hotel’s signature fragrances (with SA’s Soular Therapy), told the Current that Emma “is built around stories and history, and all along these stories have helped us define the brand and envision the unique experience.” She struggled to even elucidate the involvement of her team over the past two years; the role has been “so massive” and the scope “so unusual.” Speaking in general terms, Giles feels as though this “once-in-a-lifetime project” benefitted from the team’s “if you build it, they will come” approach. “Rather than guess at what people want,” she explained, “why not give them something so amazing that they didn’t even know they wanted it?”

BRYAN RINDFUSS

22 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

••••••••••••

US S

Design Details To say that there were no accidents in the Herculean, multi-year undertaking of decorating and designing Hotel Emma is to “deny the accident,” as Jackson Pollock once did. Led by New York design firm Roman and Williams, with huge assists from countless locals, the interior design of Emma is

CULINARY CONCIERGE

A New Orleans native and Trinity University grad, Daschbach got his first taste of one side of the hospitality business helping run Trinity’s office of conferences and special programs. After a brief detour in the environmental industry, he was looking to get back into hospitality and was serendipitously offered an interview at Emma. The position had been envisioned but not fully defined. Perfect. “So the idea is to invite our favorite parts of the city into the hotel … to expose the guests to what we think of as the ‘real’ San Antonio.” The chefs, he says, have a printed menu of dishes, but “I have more of an activities list — I’m curating experiences different from a guidebook.” So, from a typical upcoming week: Tuesday — Daschbach demonstrating oyster shucking in the lobby; Thursday — author and cultural anthropologist Sherry Kafka Wagner discoursing informally on her book collection in The Library; Friday — Chris Waters Dunn discussing his new enchilada book and maybe teaming with Cappy Lawton for a demo. But not everything will be in-house. “We’re catering to the well-fed and the wellread,” says Daschbach, and these folks aren’t afraid to get out and get their hands dirty. (We both blame Anthony Bourdain for some of this.) So, the program will evolve in step with guest response. The job, too, as it now sounds like culturo-culinary concierge. Now I want it even more.

BR YA N RINDF

stocked with local goodies, but has a slightly different layout and often signature furnishings. The suites are absolutely magical, maintaining the kind of eccentric, South Texasindustrial chic that pervades Emma. Each of them has its own personality and its own story to tell, and each boasts a different view of the city and/or the Pearl. Through twisting hallways and unpredictable corridors, all of which have a vaguely nautical vibe found elsewhere as well, guests arrive at these rooms with an uncommon sensation of mystery and seclusion. The rooms, speaking in terms of aesthetic aftertaste, maintain a feeling of wear and history, while suggesting adventure and freshness.

dramatic boutique will naturally be hotel guests and residents of nearby condos and apartments, but “we are one of [the hotel’s] operations with the most public access, so we automatically become a kind of ambassador.” Her food diplomacy includes a list of pressed sandwiches (wood-grilled lamb with labneh), cold sandwiches (duck confit muffaletta with goat cheese), as well as salads prepared by the Supper kitchen. “We’re not a café [though there will be a couple of tables inside and more outside], so everything will be packaged to go” — maybe even slipped into baskets that can be attached to one of the hotel’s loaner bicycles (Electra cruisers) available to guests. Lange has also curated a modest selection of wines and beers and, with the help of Local Coffee’s Merit Roasting, will operate a coffee station making use of beans grown especially for them in Nicaragua.

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ARTS + CULTURE

Now carefully preserved, the Alamo was once in ruins

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SAY Sí’s 9th Annual

Muertitos Fest Tree of Life: Storytelling & Rituals November 5 – 7, 2015 A 3-day Día de los Muertos festival celebrating the rich Mexican-American culture of San Antonio and the tradition that ties our city to Mexico.

MICHAEL MARKS/@MICHAELPMARKS

The Alamo in the mid-1800s, after a French businessman bought the convento.

“Today its grim walls, scarred and battered in that heroic struggle for liberty, stand threatened by vandalism and menaced by the hand of commercialism.” It seems impossible that this could be written about any building in San Antonio. Few cities prioritize historic preservation so much, and if any structure were to be protected, it would surely be the Alamo. But the quote is part of a 1903 pitch from the Daughters of the Republic of Texas to raise money to save the Shrine of Texas Liberty from ruin. It’s unfathomable that such measures were necessary, given that the Alamo will soon enter a new era with perhaps an even broader footprint. The City of San Antonio and the Texas General Land Office, which operates The Alamo, formalized a partnership on October 9 to redevelop Alamo Plaza. The state committed $31 million for the project, with the city chipping in another $17 million. A fundraising campaign by the Alamo Endowment Board aims to raise hundreds of millions more from private donors. The new plan could give the site a drastic makeover, reimagining its operations and design. Developing the plan will take at least a year. Although the Alamo’s preservation is now meticulously planned, this wasn’t always true. In the decades following the 13-day siege of 1836, the symbol of Texan independence crumbled and rotted. Poop from swallows and bats, thousands of which colonized the rafters,

piled up. Soldiers carved their names into walls and bored out old musket balls. Souvenir seekers collecting chunks of rubble was not only common, it was practically legal. Through 1840, the San Antonio town council allowed people to fill up a wagonload of brick from the Alamo wreckage for $5. While those who died in battle were honored, the structures they defended languished. The Catholic Church, which owned the Alamo at the time, sold the convento — where most of the fighting had occurred — in 1877 to Honoré Grenet, a French businessman. Grenet used the remaining structure of the convento to build a grocery wholesaler. The business was an eyesore. Tourists and residents complained of commercializing the Alamo. “It’s a strange, very strange mingling of fame and sourkraut [sic], and still stranger the fact that the great State of Texas … should permit a historic building like the Alamo … to become a grocery warehouse,” a tourist wrote to a Galveston newspaper in 1881. The grocer changed hands in 1882. The new proprietors nearly sold the property to a hotel before it was acquired by the DRT, whose efforts helped restore the Alamo to its present state (though not without considerable internal strife). Though the DRT is credited with rebuilding the Alamo, the Land Office is now its custodian. And how the agency balances the same issues that plagued the Shrine in the past – commercialization, expansion and preservation, to name a few – remains to be seen. mmarks@sacurrent.com

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CUSSING COUSINS

A family fights over identity in Bad Jews STEVEN G. KELLMAN

After the funeral of a Holocaust survivor, his grandchildren – Daphna Feygenbaum and Jonah and Liam Haber — spend a bellicose night together in an Upper West Side studio apartment. A garrulous, opinionated yenta who is soon to graduate from Vassar, Daphna proclaims her intention to pursue rabbinical studies in Israel. She excoriates Cousin Liam for skiing in Aspen while Poppy was dying and castigates him for being a self-hating Jew who, a graduate student in Japanese culture, is respectful of every tradition but his own. He is, she insists, “a bad Jew.” Liam even has the chutzpah to bring along a shiksa, a blonde, bland squeeze named Melody. Much of Bad Jews, Joshua Harmon’s raucous, wrenching, and riveting comedy, consists of ferocious rants that Daphna and Liam each deliver against the other. Family heirlooms can bring out the worst in people. Liam accuses Daphna, whose real name is Diana, of fraud, of flaunting her Jewishness to disguise Ava L’Amoreaux brings energy insecurities. Daphna warns that Liam’s and subtlety to the exhausting role of assimilationism is a rejection of family Daphna, an obnoxious, manipulative, bonds and a fatal blow to a rich and pious and pathetic creature. Chris ancient heritage. She also envies Liam’s Rothbauer crafts Liam as an explosive parents’ wealth: “Compared to your case study in the failure of anger family, we’re the Joads.” management. Brandi Hollsten’s Melody Fierce conflict between Daphna is a vapid goy who nevertheless and Liam comes to a head over an commands one of the play’s best heirloom, a gold amulet in the shape moments — a brilliantly awful rendition of of “Chai,” a Hebrew word meaning the song “Summertime.” Though the cat alive (Daphna gives chai the authentic got his tongue, Nicholas Bright’s Jonah guttural pronunciation, whereas Liam swallows the whale. Anglicizes it as hai). Poppy held on to it Director Mark McCarver sets his through two years in the Nazi camps, and production of Bad Jews in the round, Daphna now covets it. But, as the oldest situating the audience as onlookers at grandchild, Liam warns: “You would have a vicious family squabble that we are to kill me before I would let you helpless to mediate or ignore. have Poppy’s Chai.” Refusing “What is a good Jew?” is the Bad Jews to be drawn in, Liam’s younger puzzling question implicit in $16-$22 brother Jonah insists: “I really this play. Bad Jews answers 7:30pm Thu, 8pm Sat, 2:30pm Sun don’t want to be involved in with a nasty, hilarious barrage The Sheldon Vexler Theatre this.” Jonah is the most taciturn Barshop Jewish Community that resolves nothing but of the characters on stage, but demonstrates how desperate Center of San Antonio 12500 NW Military Hwy. his actions speak louder than human beings make their (210) 302-6835 words at the play’s startling separate offerings l’chaim, vexler.org conclusion. to life. Through Nov. 14

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sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 27

SCREENS

Ansari and SA native Noël Wells

AZIZ OF ALL TRADES

Aziz Ansari probes modern romance and technology in new comedy CODY VILLAFANA

In the current age of stand-up comedy, it’s almost never enough for a comedian to just be on stage. Through podcasts, writing books, acting and more, today’s top stand-up acts are constantly using myriad media forms as an extension of their material. And what better place than Netflix for a modern comedian, like Aziz Ansari, to be given creative reign for unfiltered thoughts, which is exactly what audiences get in his new series Master of None. Ansari plays Dev, an actor, who for years has made a name for himself in commercials. In the series, he finally gets a film role as well as a number of other potential jobs to boost his profile. Watching Ansari purposely give overthe-top performances in a fake movie within the show, called The Sickening, and seeing him frighten a bunch of people with a public Skype audition in a coffee shop, serve as great fodder for the underbelly of Dev trying to break into acting. Ansari makes use of a fantastic cast, including a completely absurd Eric Wareheim, of Tim and Eric fame. Wareheim steals every second of screen time he has while playing Ansari’s best friend. Smaller but significant parts from people like Todd Barry and H. Jon Benjamin also add a healthy dose of humor. The heart and soul of the show, though, comes by way of San Antonio28 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

native Noël Wells, who plays Ansari’s love interest, Rachel. Introduced in the first episode, and appearing sporadically until the back half of the series, Wells is adorable, funny, immensely charming and has a real palpable chemistry with Ansari. It’s a breakout role that, with any luck, will lead to many more romantic leads in the future. It may seem like a lazy comparison, but Master of None truly feels like Ansari’s version of comedian Louis CK’s hit series Louie. Stylistically, the show feels far more like an independent film than a TV show, an aesthetic that is given some clout with indie film veteran James Ponsoldt (The End of the Tour) directing the pilot. To further the comparisons with Louie, most of the first half of the first season of Master of None is episodic and self-contained, with no real ongoing storylines. Instead, we see Ansari and co-creator Alan Yang’s take on several topics. While it isn’t necessarily autobiographical, Master of None feels extremely personal to Ansari and Yang, who was a writer on Parks and Recreation, where Ansari got his big TV break. Through his unique lens, Ansari smartly tackles gender and generational gaps, like how children of immigrants can take things for granted and the stereotyping of actors of Indian descent. It is when the show begins to become slightly more serialized, however, that Master of None shows its true potential. Without a doubt, the best parts of Master of None are those that study the relationship between Dev and Rachel. Watching the relationship move through different stages is a joy, as you can see the fluidity, complexity and ever-changing aspects, from the early honeymoon phase to eventual complacency. It’s a shame that this storyline

wasn’t given just a touch longer to breathe, as it goes through several phases in what feels like a relatively short period of time. Through his stand-up acts, and in his recent book Modern Romance, Ansari has shown a fascination with technology and how the younger generation not only uses it for virtually everything, but how it has changed dating and relationships. Master of None is no different, with almost every episode containing some sort of plotline on how technology impacts daily life. Whether it’s Ansari getting lost in a vortex of articles and reviews and losing an afternoon trying to find the best taco in the city, debating on the right text to send a girl who might be ignoring him, or showing the differences in how women and men are treated on social media, Ansari’s characters are constantly shown with their faces buried in a phone, displaying the shameless generational over-reliance on technology. If there’s a central theme of Master of None, it is about resisting, or at the very least, struggling with maturity. It’s an appropriate theme, considering that this is easily the most mature thing that Ansari has ever done. In many ways, it is an extension of his stand up, but it also has earnestness, a deep sense of substance and something that Ansari has never been known for, subtlety. There are certainly some blemishes. Some episodes are a tad heavy-handed, some end a little too abruptly, and the best plotline takes far too long to dig into. It’s still great to see another side of Ansari and is a very welcome new and unique perspective on television. All 10 episodes of Master of None debut on Friday, November 6 on Netflix.

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 29

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Check out fresh daily content at sacurrent.com 30 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

SCREENS

KINGDOM OF SHADOWS Documentary sheds light on human rights abuses and the so-called War on Drugs D.T. BUFFKIN /@DTBUFFKIN

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Saturday, 11/07 5pm - Midnight The narco-conflicts and humanitarian approval, running from tacit to rabid, of crises in Mexico and the Southwestern millions of them, is despicable. United States are some of the most Kingdom of Shadows is a pressing human rights issues in the documentary written and directed world. The Mexican government by Bernardo Ruiz which covers the estimates that since 2007, 23,000 peak of violence and disappearances people have been disappeared by rival throughout 2010 and 2011, and the cartels, the police and SWAT-like experiences and reactions of three units established to try to engender people centrally involved: a nun peace in the country. This is a grinding against the stony resolve of conservative estimate. bureaucracy to get justice and attention Most of the carnage captured in the for families of the disappeared, a 2015 documentary Kingdom of Shadows Texan who smuggled marijuana from is centered in Monterrey, where the Zeta Mexico to the U.S. in the ‘80s, just and Gulf cartels battle over control of the before the enactment of President drug flow while waging a barbaric and Ronald Reagan’s draconian policies ruthless war of attrition upon each other targeting people of color and people in and the innocent civilians trapped in the economic duress, and a former border crossfire. patrol agent who worked his way up the This is, of course, terrible and ladder only to become disenchanted unfortunate. It’s also, sadly, a dry with the established prevention and and clinical observation to a crisis detention techniques of the system. that demands attention, action and The film, in its 73 profound minutes resolution. That a candidate for the expounds upon the causes and effects most powerful political position in the of the U.S. and Mexico’s War on world — Donald Trump — can openly Drugs — which we’re told can be won state that he wants to by aggressive militarism, capture, detain and deport harsh prison sentencing and Kingdom of Shadows over 10 million human beings screening and Q&A simple moral fortitude — far to a country whose violence with writer/director better than I could in a short and rigid hierarchical inequity Bernardo Ruiz preview. Luckily, Ruiz will be Free with RSVP have thrust them across a on hand to field questions 7:30pm border that they are willing Tue, Nov. 10 and comments after the Guadalupe Theater to die to cross, something screening. So, check it out. 1301 Guadalupe St. most U.S. citizens could It’s your civic duty. (210) 271-3151 never comprehend, hence the guadalupeculturalarts.org dtbuffkin@sacurrent.com

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FOOD

OUR TASTERS

WRAP BATTLE

Ron Bechtol: Food writer and falafel fan Jessica Elizarraras: Food and nightlife editor with a penchant for all things saucy Bryan Rindfuss: Resident pescatarian and Mediterranean food connoisseur

A falafel-off we most certainly won STAFF

Comparing lauded falafels across town was likely a fool’s errand, considering the vast differences between wraps, but here we are. The criteria are simple: eat falafel, write about its merits and/or pitfalls and repeat. Here are our findings.

•

Jerusalem Grill’s take on the falafel sandiwch earned points for its no-fuss presentation.

JERUSALEM GRILL 3259 Wurzbach Road • (210) 680-8400 • jerusalemgrill.net RB: The toasty pita (a tad dry) partly wrapped in foil, is itself wrapped around flattened falafel balls dressed with pickles, parsley, tomato and a loose tahini sauce. The parsley seems a good touch; the pickle ratio is especially good (yes, I like pickles). The flattened falafels themselves are cheekily crunchy and reasonably moist, but the tahini sauce seems to have little impact (Maybe ask for extra on side?). I ordered a side of maharmara (roasted red peppers with garlic and chili — flavorful and not searingly hot) and would recommend doing the same if consuming the pita there. This is reasonably portable for to-go purposes, the tahini being modestly enough applied not to drip much. Comes with fries. JE: Sampled second while on our tour de falafel sandwich, Jerusalem Grill had the difficult task of standing out and winning over taste buds before fatigue set in. Mission accomplished. Our server on duty explained the bread was shrak, brought in

Firrssdt ays T hu_ S A · TX

34 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

NOVEMBER

from a Mediterranean store in Austin, though the bread will be made in-house at the second Jerusalem Grill on Wurzbach (a bigger locale housed in a former IHOP that’s catty-corner from Pasha Mediterranean Grill). The falafel was suitably moist, crunchy and the pickle spear (pickled at the restaurant) added a sour crunch. Though the tahini was lacking, I could have just as easily added our order of the fried eggplant to thicken up this wrap. BR: Thanks to our neurotic questions, atypical requests (one sandwich for two people at 4 p.m., please) and tabletop tinkering with a DSLR, our friendly server at caught onto our falafel taste-test and calmly asserted that theirs would win top honors. And, in my opinion at least, he was right. Although filled to a somewhat modest capacity, the flavors and textures were balanced, spot on and ultimately more satisfying than others about town. Price point: $5.59; substitute one of the apps for an extra $1.99 Hours: 11am-midnight daily

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FOOD

BAGHDAD BAKERY & SANDWICH SHOP 5713 Evers Road • (210) 523-5555 RB: We weren’t going to do this one, but it is distinctive. The loaves are split the long way for filling (this is not a wrap) — and they do a unique, sourish mango sauce that must use a lot of turmeric — not to mention green mango? The frying takes place just behind the counter, so this is the most street-food-like in that respect. Other accompaniments include lettuce, sliced tomato and sliced cucumber — no pickle and no observable tahini. These coarsely textured balls of falafel appear to have been flattened before frying; they remain moist and crunchy. The mango sauce is unique, to be sure (they included a small container of it), but I might have preferred a maharmara — or one of Weissman’s. JE: This iteration gets points for the amount of veggies thrown in the mix. During my visit with Bryan, the greenery included bell peppers, thick tomato slices, pickled jalapeños (a South Texas version, perhaps?) and Spanish olives. The turmeric-laden sauce — no name was given, but we learned it’s also used in their barbecued fish — would benefit from a lighter touch. The oval Iraqi bread, or samoun, is baked in house. Would definitely eat anything else sandwiched between this loaf. BR: I photographed all four of the sandwiches in this spread (pretty much) as they’re served and Baghdad’s — spilling with a colorful mix of veggies — was easily the most photogenic. Sturdier than some, their choice of Iraqi bread makes a user-friendly vehicle for the nicely seasoned falafel and its fixin’s. The sandwich’s hard-todefine, mustard-yellow sauce adds intrigue at first but leaves a slightly overpowering aftertaste that distracts from the main attraction. Price point: $5.99 sandwich only Hours: 9am-10:30pm daily NAARA CAFÉ HOOKAH 9329 Wurzbach Road • (210) 558-9800 naaracafe.com

•

From top to bottom: Baghdad Bakery & Sandwich Shop, Moshe’s Golden Falafel and Naara Cafe Hookah

RB: At around 1 p.m. on a Saturday afternoon, there was a smattering of hubbly-bubblers on the covered patio — so I chose indoors. The falafels come both as an appetizer and as a plate with fries, plus extra pickle and tomato slices. The wrap, cut across the middle, has been seriously flattened and toasted panini-style; it’s much toastier than any of the others. And it appears the falafel balls inside get flattened in the toasting process. These balls are composed of fava, wheat and chick pea, they’re crunchy and appealingly moist. But a single falafel, still ball-shaped, that was served as a kind of accessory on top of the flattened wrap, was especially delicate and flavorful — the best single ball, I’d say. Accessories inside include tomato and, uniquely, hummus — I prefer this to a wimpy tahini. The pickles could use help, however. Weissman’s are way better.

JE: Naara’s take wins if we’re only considering portability. It’s easily the neatest wrap of the lot, but what it makes up for in transportability, it lacks in oomph. The falafel, at least during our visit, could have been chewier, but I did appreciate the added hummus spread. The bread, we’re guessing, is a lavash brought in fresh from neighboring Ali Baba that tastes more like a tortilla than traditional pita. BR: At first glance, Naara’s falafel wrap could pass for a flattened burrito. And presented as it is with rough-cut fries dusted with paprika, the combo reads as bar food — the most Americanized presentation in this admittedly limited bunch. Yet Naara’s falafel has a classic taste and texture and the tortilla-like wrapper adds lightness and big portability points. (If you’re looking for a road-trip falafel, this is it.) Bonus: The accompanying tzatziki/hot sauce dip duo works surprisingly well on those fries. Cost: $8.99 served with fries, chunky tzatziki dip and chili sauce Hours: 11am-2am Mon-Thu; 11am-4am Fri-Sat; noon-2am Sun MOSHE’S GOLDEN FALAFEL 3910 McCullough Ave., Suite 102 RB: Weissman’s balls (Editor’s note: Phrasing!) are the least of it here for me — after tasting all the others, I think the texture/grind may be too fine. But the freshfrom-the-oven whole wheat pita wins, the pickles are great, and if used with discretion, many of the add-ons can work. My solution would be to order a plate with a pita on the side, and perform a stuff-it-yourself ritual with select sides such as the pickle, marinated onion, hummus, babaganoush … just not all of it at once as Weissman seems to prefer. Of course, this would be hard if taking to go in true street fashion — don’t know how his normal to-go pitas are packaged. JE: Fuck discretion, but do grab as many paper napkins as possible. The roll at the table is an outfit saver, though I’m pretty sure I had tahini in my hair by the time we left. The balls seemed scooped as one would a tray of cookies, but could have used a quick smash. Otherwise, pack in the great add-ons — roasted red pepper hummus, chunky pickles, all the red onions — and get to work. BR: Moshe’s takes the street-food staple to a higher culinary level — thankfully without turning it into something obnoxious. Here, a neatly arranged assortment of colorful (but unlabeled) add-ons can lead to an adventurous (and potentially quite messy) bite. On our visit, the falafel — slightly mealy and possibly a bit too large — took a back seat to the house-baked pita and veggie-friendly spread of accouterments. Price point: $7 for a golden falafel Hours: 11am-3pm Mon-Fri sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 35

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FOOD

JACQUELINE FIERRO

BÁNH MÌ TOUR The 20-Somethings snack on Vietnamese sandos ALYSSA WALKER

•

Walker and Fierro blog for Twenty Something SA about the city’s evolving lifestyle and entertainment options.

• Find fresh veggies at Whiskey Cake.

FRENCH SANDWICHES 8448 Fredericksburg Road • (210) 692-7019 First stop, French Sandwiches located in the Medical Center. Honestly, we were not expecting to find bánh mì on the menu, but we did. The pork and vegetables were parallel with the Vietnamese sandwich, but crispy bread and garlic mayo gave it a French touch. Typically with bánh mì, I cover the top of the sandwich with hoisin and Sriracha, but I was pleasantly surprised with the garlic mayo. I still ordered hoisin on the side. Price point: $8.10 Hours: 9am-6:30pm Mon-Fri; 10am-5pm Sat; closed Sun PHO HUNG CUONG 12730 W. I-10, Suite 302 • (210) 691-1500 When we arrived at Pho Hung Cuong, everyone was eating pho because of the cooler weather. Our waiter recommended the pork bánh mì for a mere $4.60. The sandwich was stacked with fresh carrots, jalapenos, cilantro and cucumbers, which gave the sandwich a nice crunch. We paired our bánh mì with a bowl of pho. How can you resist pho when everyone around you is eating it? If we had to choose one favorite item from Pho Hung Cuong, the soup would win hands down, but the bánh mì was a good contender. Price point: $4.60 Hours: 10am-10pm daily

WHISKEY CAKE • 15900 La Cantera Pkwy., Suite 21200 • (210) 236-8095 • whiskeycakesa.com With our stomachs still ravenous, we jumped in the car and headed down I-10. We heard the chef at Whiskey Cake went around the city trying a variety of bánh mìs to come up with the perfect Whiskey Cake version of this Vietnamese classic. That’s when the Thai cashew pork baguette with French bread was created. The anticipation grew as we waited and once it arrived, Jacqueline and I immediately knew this was not your typical bánh mì. Looking at the sandwich, we could tell that the vegetables had been cut the moment we ordered. The sandwich was not too spicy, not too dry, not too heavy, but not too light. The meat is thick and had a smoky barbecue touch. If you’re looking for an Americanized version of bánh mì, look no further than the Shops at La Cantera. Price point: $13 Hours: 11am-11pm Mon-Thu; 11am-midnight Fri; 10am-midnight Sat; 10am-10pm Sun

CONTINUED ON PAGE 39 ►

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 37

There can only be ONE!

THE GAME IS ALWAYS ON! GAME-TIME DRINK SPECIALS!

Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner & everything in-between! FULL BAR OPENS AT 7AM!

Wednesday, 11/4 Cali Merlot vs. French Bordeaux It’s a battle Royale. California vs. France. Join us as we explore the differences between these 2 popular wines. Just by adding a little juice from other varietals France takes the merlot grape to another level, while California keeps it real.

Sun: 11 am - 2 am | Mon-Sat: 7 am - 2 am | 5562 Fredericksburg Rd. In the Medical Center

Friday, 11/6 | First Friday Wine Walk In anticipation of the new Star Wars episode 7 release, we will be having a Star Wars themed Wine Walk. We will be having a raffle for some awesome prizes.

11/11 Southern Hemisphere Tasting Come and enjoy the varietals from the Southern Hemisphere. Web: NectarSA.com @Nectarsat

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FOOD

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• Bánh from Viet Nam (top left), Singhs (right) and French Sandwiches

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE TK

VIET NAM RESTAURANT 3244 Broadway • (210) 822-7461 We ended our Vietnamese-inspired tour at Viet Nam on Broadway. Bánh xèo, a Vietnamese savoury fried pancake, was on the menu and although were were a bit nervous because we had never eaten a fried Vietnamese pancake filled with shrimp and pork, we ordered two. The bánh xeo was served with lettuce and cilantro, and the server informed me that you were to cut the pancake, wrap it in lettuce with cilantro and top it off by dipping it into fish sauce. It truly felt as though we were in a different country. The authenticity of the dish was exciting. If you’re Vietnamese cuisine fanatics like us, bánh xèo is where it’s at for an extra kick of flavor. Price point: $11.85 Hours: 11am-9pm Mon-Sat; closed Sun

SINGHS VIETNAMESE TRUCK 7331 N. Loop 1604 W. Singhs Vietnamese Truck can be described in one word — amazing. We ordered a chicken bánh mì and the flavor from the chicken and sauce on the sandwich created such an enthralling, savory taste. The bread on this bánh mì was softer than the other sandwiches we tried on the tour and truly made a difference in the overall dish. The winner, in our book, of the bánh mì tour goes to Singhs. Price point: $8 Hours: 11:30am-2pm and 5-11pm Tue-Sun

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FOOD

Sandos z z i S l i n’

THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS TOO MANY SANDWICHES

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS• D.T. BUFFKIN

Not content with a tour of bánh mì and a handful of falafel, we penned a handy guide on where to find a solid selection of sandwiches in San Anto.

We may not have a deluge of Jewish delis in town, but we make do. You can get your fix of pastrami at The Granary ‘Cue & Brew (featured on the cover, 602 Avenue A, 210-228-0124) where chef Tim Rattray entices with this Friday-only scratch-made sandwich on homemade rye, thick-cut pastrami and delicate sauerkraut. Or head to Fratello’s Deli (2503 Broadway, 210-444-0277) where you’ll find the Napoli with capocolla, ham, provolone, thick banana peppers, romaine, tomatoes, red onions and zippy vinaigrette. Get a traditional cold Italian hero from Florio’s Pizza (7701 Broadway, 210-805-8646) with thinly sliced Genoa salami, ham, pepperoni, provolone, lettuce, tomato and vinegar dressing. W.D. Deli’s (3123 Broadway, 210-

• CUBANOS: THE ONLY GOOD THING

TO COME OUT OF CHEF By now, most should know not to get me started on why Chef was such a shit movie. Schlubby asshole Jon Favreau somehow manages to land both Sofia Vergara and Scarlett Johansson and doesn’t have a single female staff member in the kitchen? Please. But the food flick scrubbed away most annoyances with serious Cubano sandwich porn, and the availability of said sando has seen a generous uptick since the film’s debut. Eat ‘em up at Luna Rosa Puerto Rican Grill y Tapas (2603 SE Military Drive, #107, 210-314-3111) with savory lechon; Bakery Lorraine (306 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 110, 210-862-5582) with amazing toasted bread; Esquire Tavern (155 E. Commerce St., 210-222-2521, featured right) with mojo-marinated pork loin, ancho chile pulled pork and house pickles; and The Last Word’s (229 E. Houston St., #10, 210-314-1285) Mexican Cuban with ham, escabeche, queso Oaxaca, chile rojo and grain mustard.

•

Dignowity Meat’s turkey caprese sandwich

KODY MELTON

• WHILE ON THE SUBJECT OF LEGIT DELIS…

828-2322) sammies get points for variety — the chicken chipotle parmesan has been longtime fave, but don’t miss the turkey club. Finally, Dignowity Meats’ (1701 E. Houston St., 210-462-1496) lineup of funky twists on deli faves is a new standby.

LIZZY FLOWERS

• OLD FAITHFUL Five-and-a-half years ago, before I was the leading Music/Screens Editor in the free world, I began working at a 300-square foot sandwich shop that served the best sandwiches I had ever tasted. That was The Filling Station. Now, it has moved next door, added on a taproom and become The Station Café. It still has the best sandwiches in town, due to its signature sauces, ranging from the mild, but pungent super-duper garlic, to the sweet and spicy coconut and Serrano of the Chupacabra, the ever-popular habanero and the hellish Pele’s Fire. The bread is made daily and everything from the salads to the desserts are made in-house from scratch. But, I could be partial — I did eat there every day for five-and-a-half years. The Station Café, 108 King William St., (210) 444-2200, thestationsa.com; 11am9pm Mon-Fri.

•

You can’t go wrong with any of the sammies at The Station Cafe.

• PO’BOY CENTRAL

I’ve got a bit of a po’boy problem and The Cookhouse’s (720 E. Mistletoe Ave., 210-320-8211) Pieter Sypesteyn is my current dealer. I’ve been jonesin’ for the flaky bread (he ships it in from Gambino’s in New Orleans) since the CONTINUED ON PAGE 42 ►

•

The Esquire’s smoky take on a Cubano

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 41

FOOD JESSICA ELIZARRARAS

• FUEL • RESTAURANT • PRODUCE • MEAT MARKET•

•

700 N. ALAMO

Brigid’s steak sandwich (left) and South Alamode Panini & Gelato Company’s caprese (right)

210.444.0711

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE 41

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Where Y’at truck launched, but now I can get a steady fix at the eatery off Mistletoe. Nine versions fill the lunch menu currently, with fried shrimp, and the Peacemaker (where fried oysters meet house-made bacon) coming in as some of the top selling items, all dressed with shredded iceberg lettuce, tomato, pickles and mayonnaise. The latest po’boy to make the lunch menu is hard to pinpoint. Created by cook Brandon Wright, the po’boy features thick-sliced, house-brined, smoked and steamed pastrami, provolone instead of the classic Swiss, and a spicy, bright fuchsia red sauerkraut. The whole messy thing is tied together with a “secret sauce.” Get more po’boys at Southerleigh Fine Food & Brewery (136 E. Grayson St., Suite 120, 210455-5701) which changes its creation almost daily; Lüke San Antonio (125 E. Houston St., 210-227-5853) where you can get your hands on a 6-inch Gulf oyster po’boy; or Cured (306 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 101, 210-314-3929) where offerings change daily, but we’re partial to the fried green tomatoes with shrimp remoulade and onion sprouts.

• TASTY TORTAS

Our collective torta game in the city, like our love for po’boys, has seen a bump. Take one down for brunch at The Fruteria Botanero by chef Johnny Hernandez (1401 S. Flores St., 210-251-3104). We’re partial to the Sincronizada with scrambled eggs, ham, Oaxaca cheese, avocado and crema. Head to Mezcalería Mixtli (5313 McCullough Ave., 856630-5142)where the menu now permanently includes your choice of braise — carnitas, tinga, mole, cachet

(beef cheek) or chicharron con salsa verde — sandwiched between custommade bolillos from La Michoacana. Or choose your bread at La Panaderia (8305 Broadway, 210-375-6746) — telera, birote or croissant — and filling (get the chicken Milanesa or chorizo and egg). If you’re not afraid of a little mess, get thee to Ro-Ho Pork & Bread (623 Urban Loop, 210-800-3487) or El Chivito Tortas Ahogadas (204 Crossroads Blvd., 210-369-9638), and get your hands dirty with the solid carnitas and sopping birote topped with a thin tomato sauce. Use the bag that accompanies most of these tortas — a salsa poncho, if you will.

• VEG-FRIENDLY

The Classic, our cover model from Green Vegetarian Cuisine (multiple locations) is a solid start with its avocado, cucumbers, sprouts and whatnots. If you’re feeling more adventurous, Liberty Bar’s (1111 S. Alamo St., 210-227-1187) Portobello sandwich with grilled potato slices, smoked gouda and saffron aioli is an adult option. In a pinch? Or pair a caprese Panini with gelato from the South Alamode Panini & Gelato Company (1420 S. Alamo St., 210-788-8000).

• GO EAT THESE NOW:

The steak sandwich at Brigid (803 S. St. Mary’s St., 210-263-7885) on pillowy baguette is downright magical. Cullum’s Attagirl’s (726 E. Mistletoe Ave., 210-437-4263) take on fried chicken bologna, mayo, pimento cheese and pickles with seasoned white bread is a must. Now that The Monterey is done, you’ll want to get your grilled cheese fix with the ladies who lunch at Bird Bakery (5912 Broadway, 210-8042473), a simple number with cheddar on toasted brioche.

•

de ht)

FOOD

FLAVOR FILE

Openings for Rebelle, Supper and Cocktail and Crafting at Blue Box JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Let’s be honest — our palates aren’t ready for what’s about to go down this November. The big news this week is the much-anticipated opening of Rebelle inside the remodeled St. Anthony Hotel (300 E. Travis St., 210-227-4392). Opened by the star team of Andrew Goodman and chef Stefan Bowers of Feast, Rebelle’s already made a splash during its soft opening this past weekend. The restaurant, which joins sister bar Haunt at the hotel, officially opens Wednesday, November 4. I’m capital E excited for what Bowers has in store. Over at the Pearl, Hotel Emma (136 E. Grayson St.) is preparing for an official opening on November 12. Supper (probably the best • restaurant name out there) We’re ready for Rebelle to knock our socks off. will see the return of John Brand to the kitchen with this “American Eatery” that’ll focus on his Midwestern approach as combined with some South Texas flair. Larder will serve as a boutique grocer with local produce, prepared foods and more, while Sternewirth will serve as the hotel’s swanky bar and clubroom. Read more about what’s in store on page 20. Anniversaries are in store for The Granary ‘Cue & Brew (620 Avenue A, 210-2280124), which turns three this November. The barbecue joint will celebrate with a dinner on Thursday, November 12 at 6:30 p.m. with five courses prepared by chef Tim Rattray and paired with Jester King’s eclectic beers. Seats ($100 per person) are limited to 30 attendees so make those reservations at thegranarysa.com. The Cookhouse (720 E. Mistletoe Ave.) turned one this September, but the celebration was postponed to Wednesday, November 11 at 7 p.m. Chef Pieter Sypesteyn and staff are creating 11 courses for 50 attendees at $125 per person ($175 with wine pairings). The menu includes turtle soup, marinated crab claws, stuffed jumbo Gulf shrimp and more. Reservations must be made by calling the restaurant (210-320-8211). The FoodWhore Company’s Javier Treviño can now be found at Blue Box (312 Pearl Pkwy.) on Tuesdays where he’s hosting a cocktail and crafting class, fittingly named Leather & Liquor. Guests will learn how to make two cocktails and a mini leather-bound cocktail journal. Classes start at $30 and start at 8:30 p.m. every Tuesday night. flavor@sacurrent.com

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NIGHTLIFE

JAIME MONZON

(Upscale)

PUB &^ GRUB Francis Bogside adds Irish charm to SA bar scene JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

By now, Steve Mahoney’s track record speaks for itself. The guy’s opened up several cocktail bars that have turned into hot spots, regardless of their previous use. Green Lantern is situated in a basement. Blue Box sits inside a former storage room, as does George’s Keep at Eilan. He’s got a knack for turning unused spaces into party playgrounds and it’s safe to say he’s done it again with Francis Bogside. Mahoney’s tapping his Irish heritage for his latest — Francis is his father’s middle name and Bogside is a small area in Northern Ireland just outside of Derry with a large Catholic majority, where Columba (or Colm Cille) serves as patron saint. “I’ve always kind of wanted to do my take on an Irish pub. A more modern take on it. Not something that’s a touristy kitschy gimmicky place,” Mahoney said a few weeks prior to Bogside’s September opening. bottles on the shelves — it’s easily more than a few dozen. The pub is unique in that it shares a kitchen with Brigid, For her part, bar manager Christine Hill, who opened named after St. Brigid of Kildare, another of Ireland’s Blue Box, has developed an opening menu that’s easy to patron saints. Though Brigid features modern American love. The Deep Purple, a bright amethyst cocktail, turned fare, the menu at Francis lets the simple potato shine me onto vodka once more. Combining vodka, blackberry, courtesy of chef Chris Carlson. lemon, lavender and bubbles, the drink served as a “Potatoes are the greatest thing or the most horrible pretty and perfect toast for a recent night out. The Irish crap that you tasted in your whole life. They can be so Old Fashioned with Irish whiskey (obviously), Guinness good if they’re done and executed properly,” Carlson said, Extra Stout syrup and orange bitters, and garnished with and his Colcannon dish definitely lands on the former side Luxardo cherries presented on black plastic screws is of that quote. The bowl of skin-on mashed potatoes with well-executed, but I’d love to see it over a large format ice carrots and onions was velvety and unique as far as bar and not the smaller cubes this version carries with it. food goes. You’ll find more Irish bites in the bacon and If this is the last stop of the night, and really it should cabbage, rustic potato bread with blue cheese, corned be after dinner at Brigid, I’d recommend the Beat Around beef hash and boxty, or potato pancake. This doesn’t the Bush, which is a cheeky misnomer for an otherwise include the full Irish breakfast available from 4 to 6 p.m. on exceedingly boozy, but balanced drink. This being a Sunday afternoons. neighborhood Irish pub, you’ll find a solid list of beers on Unlike its Pearl counterpart (true story: I don’t go to Blue draft and a few canned and bottled selections to choose Box on weekends after 7 p.m., it’s just not for me), most from. Yes, this includes Guinness. visits to Francis Bogside are met with a quiet adult-like The space itself rivals George’s Keep for most eyehum — no one’s out of hand, everyone’s behaving and catching. Like Blue Box, the space keeps certain industrial no one’s clamoring for seating space. Service has been touches, but the dark wooden fixtures, comfy black stools even-keel and smooth, even with a lot of new faces behind and steely bar tables make for a very strapping bar. It’s the shakers. But they’re not all new — behind rugged, but sleek, well built and comfortable. the long, windy bar that seats something like 20 To put it simply, Francis Bogside is an older, people alone, you’ll find Nick Kenna (previously wiser Mahoney’s version of an Irish pub, and Francis Bogside 803 S. St. Mary’s St., with Dorcol Distilling Company), Javier Treviño one that you should visit post-haste. I can’t (210) 988-3063 (of the FoodWhore Company) and Roy Guerrero vouch for this mature atmosphere once St. francisbogside.com (formerly at Concrete Jungle) are all back there as 4pm-2am Mon-Sat; Patrick’s Day rolls around. well. See if you can count the number of Jameson 4pm-midnight Sun flavor@sacurrent.com

• The Beat Around The Bush (middle) and Deep Purple

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 45

DOWNTOWN C E NTRA L The Local Bar

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The Bar

Beto’s Alt-Mex HH Happy hour from 4pm-7pm Every Day! 8142 Broadway St

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Happy Hour MONDAY-FRIDAY 4PM - 8PM: $2 DOMESTICS, $2 CALLS, $1 TAPAS ENJOY $3 YOU CALL IT’S EVERY SUNDAY AND MONDAY EVERYDAY $5 BEER + SHOT SPECIAL

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726 E Mistletoe • (210) 437-4263 Get your Happy Hour Started Early Friday Lunch Pop 11a-2p and Micro Beers

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On The Rocks Pub

270 Losoya, SATX 78205 facebook.com/ontherockspubTX HH: Mon-Fri, 2pm-7pm: $3 Wells, $3 Domestics, $3.75 Flavored Vodkas

Kimura

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114 Brooklyn Ave • torotacobar.com Reverse Happy Hour 9pm

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HH: 4- 8pm Home of the $2.50 Well Drink! $2 Domestic Draft $3 Import Draft, Daily specials 8 till close Open Mon-Fri 4pm till 2am with happy hour from 4 to 6. Sat-Sun hours are 11am till 2am with all day specials.

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Slackers

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Mon-Sat: 7am - 4pm $3.25 Import Drafts & Mini Margaritas $2.75 Domestic Drafts Tue- $3.25 Mini Hurricanes Thu- $3.25 Premium Vodka Specials Sun- $.75 Wings & $3 Sunday Specials 4-8pm: $1 off mixed drinks & appetizers!

NORTH EAST Charlie Brown’s Bar & Grill

Charlie-Browns.com • 210-496-7092 Mon.Fri. until 7pm $2.75 well drinks, $8.50 domestic pitchers, $2.75 domestic longnecks Mon.-Fri. 2-6pm 60¢ Wings Wednesday special from $6.50 domestic draft pitchers

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 47

MUSIC

‘BLACK AND TAN FANTASY’ SA’s Keyhole Club remembered in black and white J.D. SWERZENSKI

It started with a picture. Not a remarkable one at that, just a crowd of old-timey-looking men stuffed behind a table. Of course, two of those men are unequivocal jazz legends. The first, standing third to the right in those killer lapels is Duke Ellington, arguably America’s greatest composer and bandleader. The second, perched down at the end of the table and appearing to stare back up at Ellington, is Nat King Cole, who remains one of the most recognizable voices in jazz and beyond. So what were two jazz stars doing together in San Antonio this particular night? The shot, taken from the UTSA Digital Archives, dates from November of 1955. Its caption offers only a little more context: “The Photograph shows gathering at the nightclub following Cole and Ellington's midnight appearance at Majestic Theater for showing of movie Rock N' Roll Revue that they starred in [sic].” It had been three years since Ellington last came through San Antonio, bringing in his Orchestra for a “One night engagement at the Club Seven Oaks off Austin Highway.” Of course that trip was best remembered for what happened after the gig, when Ellington headed over to the Silver Slipper Club, only to get arrested on liquor curfew laws alongside the manager of the Harlem Globetrotters. As for Cole, there’s no record of any prior trips through the Alamo City, or at least none that resulted in a police report the following day. So what brought them over to this little nightclub that November night? I asked famed local jazz musician Jim Cullum Jr. to help fill in the blanks a bit more about the photo. The answer, he says, stands next to Ellington, in San Antonio-via-New Orleans club-owner Don Albert. “Don was a sort of minor jazz figure, a bandleader, disc jockey and master showman. He really made the Keyhole the spot to go whenever (jazz musicians) were in town. So it makes sense that Cole and Ellington probably stopped in to have a drink after the show.” During its heyday, the Keyhole welcomed the likes of Louis Armstrong, Sarah Vaughan, Slam Stewart and Louis Jordan, many of whom are featured in other photos from the UTSA archive. Trombonist Gene McKinney, in this interview conducted by the Institute of Texan Cultures in 1980, recounts another memorable jazz giant dropping into the Keyhole. “I remember that Dizzy Gillespie came here with his 48 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

• Nat King Cole and Duke Ellington, General Photograph Collections 107-0095, University of Texas at San Antonio Libraries Special collections

big band and played a concert at Municipal Auditorium while we were working at Keyhole. And they, of course, used to have ‘after parties’ anytime there was a concert and everybody'd go to the ‘after parties.’ Dizzy and all the guys came down to The Keyhole. Three or four of the guys played and Dizzy was clowning around the place.” It wasn’t Albert’s charisma or the drink prices at the Keyhole that made the club such a go-to spot. “(Albert) always ran a ‘black-and-tan,’ meaning he’d never restrict who could or couldn’t get in, black or white, didn’t matter,” says Cullum. “He even had white players like saxophonist Zoot Sims in the house band. That was incredibly rare back in the ’50s, especially in the South.” The key for Albert was to take advantage of the Alamo City’s unique demographics. “You had a lot of Air Force and Army people stationed in San Antonio that weren’t from the South and weren’t the least bit uncomfortable with an integrated club,” Cullum says. Outside of the Keyhole’s clientele, however, the club was making plenty of enemies for its open admission policy. “There was this Police Commissioner, (George) Roper. He didn’t like the integrated part of the club,” says

Cullum. “He used to raid the place all the time, saying they were violating liquor laws, and take everyone to jail.” After Roper attempted to have the Keyhole condemned by the city building inspector, Albert took the case to court. Incredibly, he won. Here’s Albert himself, recorded in a 1980 interview. “(The judge) said there's no laws in the State of Texas that prohibits the congregation of people regardless of race, creed or color. And then I was in no violation of any laws. Case dismissed. So consequently any place that wanted to accept the people as I accepted them...whites, blacks and all that, whoever wanted to enter the doors, it was acceptable then after the decision was made.” The 1954 ruling, delivered a full decade before the Civil Rights Act, represented a landmark decision for the still deeply segregated South Texas region. With his newfound legal protection, Albert was able to keep the Keyhole running until 1964. The building still stands on Poplar St. just west of downtown, acting now as the Cruz Blanco Fraternal Society Hall. As for Ellington, he’d come back into San Antonio just one more time. That 1972 gig, a one-nighter at the now defunct Randy’s Rodeo, came just two years before his passing.

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Role Playing & Rekindling the Romance

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MUSIC

THE ESSENTIAL ELLINGTON 6 must-hear tunes from the smoothest, wittiest, freshest and cleanest bandleader of all time D.T. BUFFKIN /@DTBUFFKIN

Duke Ellington had a wit and air that was only surpassed by the brilliant use of his greatest instrument: his Orchestra. He also composed over 1,500 songs, so this is in no way a comprehensive “essentials” list. Here are just quintessential pieces and interpretations that you just gotta get hip to, lest you die a culture-less swine. “Money Jungle” Money Jungle Money Jungle is a jazz-head’s wet dream. Not only does it involve three of the undisputed masters of “Black Classical Music” — Duke Ellington, drummer Max Roach and one-show Ellington bassist and composer extraordinaire Charles Mingus. But the modern techniques and reputation of Roach and Mingus help propel the elder Ellington into their realm … and he excels! Proving that he can swing just as hard as the younger virtuosos and still show them a thing or two. Point of interest: Mingus’ excitement to be recording with The Duke is palpable. Consider his hip-as-shit, double-stop outro. “Take the ‘A’ Train” The Time Life Giants of Jazz Compilation Written by Ellington arranger and collaborator Billy “Swee’ Pea” Strayhorn on his way to meet Ellington for an audition of sorts, “Take the ‘A’ Train” became the band’s unofficial theme piece and jumpstarted Ellington’s second wave of output. Strayhorn would become Ellington’s greatest collaborator (other than his Orchestra, as a whole) and companion. Point of interest: Strayhorn was so fresh and so clean, to say nothing of his musical genius, that despite his open homosexuality, Lena Horne longed to marry the man who penned such classics as “Chelsea Bridge,” “Lush Life,” “Satin Doll,” “UMMG” and “Hey, Buddy Bolden.” “Do Nothing ‘Til You Hear From Me” Lady Day: The Complete Billie Holiday on Columbia Vol. 10 Originally intended as a concerto for trumpeter Cootie Williams, “Do Nothing Til You Hear From Me” is a painfully, fitting canvas for the soured and smoky emoting of Lady Day. Contrary to the tired and trite comparisons of Ella Fitzgerald to Billie Holiday and vice versa, no one, not one motherfucker — to borrow

“Ain’t nobody dope as me ...”

one of Billie’s most-employed, choice characterizations — is better suited to deliver Ellington’s melodic diatribe to the coquettish but contemplative nature of Bob Russell’s lyrics. “East St. Louis Toodle-oo” The Bethlehem Years Vol. 1 Upon its release in 1976, The Ellington Orchestra’s recording (February 7 and 8, 1956) and reworking of what had, by then, become canonized standards was met with lukewarm appreciation. However, despite the criticism of the lagging tempo, especially on “Toodle-oo,” Bubber Miley’s plunger technique is played to perfection, perhaps even surpassed by violinist/vocalist/trumpeter Ray Nance. The slower tempo actually makes for a more humid, sexual, all hot-and-bothered feel to this “jungle” tune. Just try not to imagine yourself all zooted up in your cat clothes, strolling the promenade, flipping a quarter and swinging your wallet chain at all the fine kittens you meet. (That may not mean anything to you, but your grandma just got all wet.) “In a Sentimental Mood” Duke Ellington & John Coltrane This is the tune that folks ignorant to Ellington or Coltrane’s catalogs will most likely know due to its rapturously, melancholy statement of the main theme,

Ellington’s exquisite seesaw accompaniment, Coltrane’s simplistic playing (by his standards) and its revelatory beauty. Point of interest: Ellington claimed to have improvised this one at an after-party where two young women were fighting over a mutual male interest. To “pacify” all of the injured parties, he took to the piano and ad-libbed this piece, which, if this story is true, is one of the greatest feats of any modern, musical mind as its popularity, unrivaled beauty and placement in the Ellington canon attests. “I Got it Bad (and That Ain’t Good)” Thelonious Monk Plays Duke Ellington From the half-timed, stutter-stepping intro of the heavyringed fingers of Monk comes one of the most exquisite and expressive versions of the Ellington classic. This is one of those tunes, like “How Long Has This Been Going On,” or “I’d Rather Go Blind,” that the mere recitation of the title itself conjures the desired emotion that the melody seeks to pull from the listener. It’s a goddamn heartbreaker and no one can put it across like Thelonious Monk. Point of interest: Note the turn of emotion when the band picks up the tempo and the piece’s lovelorn qualities become understood and almost celebrated. @dtbuffkin@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 51

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AIN’T NOTHIN’ BUT A G THANG Alex G plumbs the depths of youth and his basement MATT STIEB

Live Music Every Night

Alex G summons the specter of Elliott Smith.

Simplicity reigns in the Rainy Day Elliott is far and away the basement universe of great reference that Giannascoli seems Philadelphian Alex G. The to point toward. In tone and in texture, 21-year-old bandleader thrives on slim, Smith’s presence is felt here like a sad hushed tunes that hit like coffee on a sot of an uncle who comes down to cold morning. check on Giannascoli working in the To say that his new record Beach cellar, handing him the bottle and giving Music was mastered is true only as a him some cherished pointers. technicality, in the same way that Kim And yet, G maintains an Kardashian published a book this year. independence from Smith and other Born Alex Giannascoli, he’s put out stylistic forebears. The lazy brilliance a crazy number of releases since 2013, of Weezer and Pavement lies heavy dropping out of Temple University to on Beach Music and its precursor sign with indie major Domino, many an DSU, with sloppy guitars and tight English major’s dream. G’s gift lies in compositions sticking in your memory. the shrugged-off feeling of his music, Northeastern emo is a component, too. like a kid in school who waits until the But, thankfully, Giannascoli spares us bus ride to knock out a perfect essay the nasal tendency and sappy content, and thinks nothing of it. maintaining only the emotional punch Released in October, Beach Music is of the genre. So far, his achievement an intimate collection, aimed at prettyhas been walking in the path tread by young-things who listen to music with his influences without sounding like a the volume up and the car windows little kid trying to hop from footprint to down. Giannascoli breathes in on the footprint of the idol of which he’s in tow. mic in the way that NPR trains their Like most good musicians, G rises correspondents, ever-reminding above his sad-boy acumen you of his presence. Often, with vivid songwriting. Alex G feat. G’s voice is double-tracked, a Singing about stray dogs and Girlpool $12 warming technique pulled from success-chasing lovers, his 9pm Sat, Nov. 7 the Johnny Walker Red-stained quippy tunes go down easy, in Paper Tiger pages of the Elliott Smith quick succession and without 2410 N. St. Mary’s St. papertigersa.com songbook. a chaser.

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MUSIC

N O V 6. 7. 8 A U S T IN , T E X A S

BRAINS & BANGERS The duality of hip-hop’s Underachievers ALEJANDRA RAMIREZ

By now, I’m not sure if being compared to the golden era of rap is a compliment or not. The Underachievers’ AK knows this: “It’s flattering being compared to that era in hip-hop, but we want to move past that. The bi-polarity is evident on The We don’t want to be Underachievers’ Evermore. placed into a box.” Labeling The Underachievers as a pure pastiche act is an injustice as much as it is untrue. The group has “Chasing Faith” or as AK battles with made themselves a singular presence temptation in “The Dualist.” amongst New York’s cool kids on the Clocking in at about an hour, the block — Beast Coast collective — though album still feels as if they’ve got not as nostalgic leaning as Joey Bada$$ too much to say with too little time or as weird as the Flatbush Zombies. to say it. Their lyricism never lets Their debut mixtape, Indigoism, had up and could be a ‘90s cypher of MCs Issa and AK knocking on the doors Freestyle Fellowship. But, they still of perception as their offbeat lyricism rub elbows with the substance-less, was coupled with the entre-producers’ substance-friendly bangers. “There’s broad-palette production, whether always been this duality with us,” Southern rap in “Herb Shuttles” or the says AK. “We have the party turn up watercolor blues of “Revelations.” shit but we also have us going on Known for their Third Eye gang some heavy stuff.” Songs like “Take musings, The Underachievers speak in Your Place” and “Moon Shot” creep elevated conversations that are redolent in with a jarring abruptness and trap to the Afrocentric illumination of the instrumentation only to descend into Jungle Brothers, De La Soul or Talib hellish braggadocio. Kweli. On their new album, Evermore At this point, you must ask, “Are the Art of Duality, The Underachievers they just like every other rapper made an effort to cut the hippie lusting for weed, girls and cash?” rhetoric. “We’re very spiritual They must be aware of people, but we tried to leave the contradictions. The The Underachievers the metaphysical references Underachievers extol on the feat Pouya & The Bufout,” AK says, while laughing. struggles of their flawed fet Boyz, Kirk Knight, “We do it a lot.” Yet, at times humanity: “We’re all human Bodega Bamz it’s hard to tell. Evermore $19-$75 and have different demons,” 8pm Fri, Nov. 6 has them spinning on their says AK. “It’s just about Alamo City Music Hall spiritual axis as Issa struggles 1305 E. Houston St. affecting the next generation as a misguided hustler in alamocitymusichall.com in a positive way.”

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56 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

SAT

Heartless Bastards

I am always reticent of groups that fall under the umbrella of what people call “americana.” Usually because it’s a bunch of white, Dylan disciples who sublimate their love for Neil Young and The Band with weak-kneed, naïve and, frankly, poorly-crafted attempts at classic American folk songs — too much coffee shop and not enough cotton gin; a touch too much Wilco or Union Station (there’s nothing wrong with Allison Krauss, but there’s only one), and not enough Charlie Feathers or Bill Monroe. As the blues, rock ‘n’ roll, hillbilly music, rhythm and blues, and countrywestern have been distilled through several decades of city dwellers and suburban latchkey YouTubers, it seems that high and lonesome, pure-prairie pining is harder and harder to come by. The Heartless Bastards have nestled that high and lonesome into their bosoms right next to their love of a vast, drawling, distorted guitar drive. Much like San Antonio’s Wild Blood, they take their knowledge of folk music and rather than duplicate the fingerpicking, three-part harmonies and fiddle licks, they incorporate the inevitable — expansive rock without a lot of roll. It is honest, straight and sincere, and as their craft, they have mastered it. With Slothrust. $15-$70, 8pm, Sam’s Burger Joint, 330 E. Grayson St., samsburgerjoint.com —dtbuffkin@sacurrent.com

Wednesday, November 4 Colonia Synchronizing the desperation

and depression of living in a society that exponentially values the almighty dollar over all other lifeforms with the aggression and hostility of activist groups that actually accomplish shit, Colonia draw attention to the marketassigned roles and socialized norms that infiltrate and influence our every relationship, decision and culture as a whole. With Coma Regalia, Joliette, Empty Vessels, Amygdala. Sound Crater Recording and Rehearsal, 10pm

Las Rosas Channeling The Animals if Eric

Burdon had started the group in San Francisco and was kicked out of the band and replaced by the singer of T-Rex acolytes the Smith Westerns — this is what the kids are digging: surf-punk doo wop that milks the minor vi chord like it had udders full of milk-weed. With Fletcher C. Johnson. Limelight, 8:30pm

Thursday, November 5

Iration I feel compelled to mock this group that covers all the suburban-reggae bases: weed, summer nights, parties, girls, swimming, drinking, stormy skies becoming clear, and all that shit, but I’ve chilled with the dudes in this band in one incarnation or another at some rich kids backyard house party and by the end of the joint realized, despite their terrible, obvious rhymes and derivative 311-vibe, they’re pretty cool dudes and just on a different tip than me. Aztec Theatre, 7pm

Jonathan Tyler In the vein of Americana

— bleh — artists with a little more Detroit in ‘em than Tulsa, J.T. waxes MidwesternRyan Adams with his soulful tenor. Sam’s Burger Joint, 9pm

Punk Rock Karaoke Join members of

several legendary punk bands as they create the soundtrack to your trashkaraoke dreams come true. Featuring Eric Melvin (NOFX), Greg Hetson (Redd Kross, Bad Religion, Circle Jerks), Steve Soto (Adolescents), and Darrin Pfieffer (Goldfinger). Just try not to get all fanboy when doing “Don’t Call Me White” with Melvin on guitar. With One Last Shot and Given a Chance. Korova, 7:30pm

Sphynx Wavy lasers, the lisp of a drum

machine hi-hat, a bass drum that weighs a ton and falsetto, micro korg-ed vocals color this group’s MGMT, Daft Punk, Cut Copy electropop stylings. Limelight, 9pm

Together Pangea I feel like I’m stuck in

the summer of ’08, perpetually slamming Four Lokos, smoking shwag and waiting for In the Red Records to respond to the shitty tape I sent them, like, 6 months ago. Together Pangea, despite their band name that screams geography nerd cum emo hearthrob (thanks Rivers Cuomo), are pretty dope. I’m just really curious how much they dig Jawbreaker. With The Rich Hands and The Bolos. The Korova Basement, 8pm

Ulterior Motive This group of experienced musicians has collaborated to create

sacurrent.com • November 4–10 2015 • CURRENT 57

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MUSIC

their own unique expression in jazz music. Carmens de la Calle Café, 7:30pm

Wax Idols Finally, a dance band that

not only plays their own instruments (and they’re not all drum machines and synthesizers) but doesn’t sound like a rejected submission to Yo Gabba Gabba! I am a sucker for name-songs and “Deborah” delivers, complete with pleading chorus/outro cries of “Deber-rah!” They’ve even got a freestlye, hip-hop bridge that sounds just like The Material Girl or Deb(orah)bie Harry. With Them Are Us Too. Paper Tiger, 9pm

Friday, November 6

Aaron Lewis Get your rotten tomatoes

ready for the dark-bro stylings of Limp Bizkit-fave, ’01 omen of the forthcoming Nickelback cadre of rockers that have zero sex appeal, (unless you’re Avril Lavigne) and registered Republican that forever cursed us with being subjected to “It’s been awhile...” at the karaoke bar...but now he’s “country.” Cowboys Dancehall, 7pm

Noah Peterson Multi-genre saxophonist,

composer, arranger, producer and more at the cozy, sister-tequila-bar to The Cove. Sancho’s Cantina, 7pm

The Uprising, Voracious, and Donella Drive After a grueling three-year

citywide search for dependable, passionate musicians, and encountering countless flakes along the way, The Uprising was formed in April 2011. Without Craigslist, none of this would have been possible. Thanks, Craig. They are really buff also, which is always a precarious position for a rocker that isn’t Henry Rollins to be in. Limelight, 9pm

Saturday, November 7 Brian Marquis Brian Marquis, former

guitarist of the beloved Boston-based post-hardcore outfit Therefore I Am, has signed to Equal Vision Records as a solo artist. 502 Bar, 9pm

Jason James Up-and-coming Texas artist

Jason James is here to bridge the gap between the red dirt music we enjoy (?) and the classic country we love. Floore’s Country Store, 9pm

Lisa Marshall Lisa Marshall is a rhythm &

blues singer influenced by Motown, soul,

and rock ‘n’ roll. Marshall’s soulful tunes belong in the credits of every familyoriented rom-com, i.e. Stepmom, The Family Stone, etc. Luna, 9:30 pm

Robert Cray Considered one of the greatest guitarists and credited for reinventing the blues with his distinct razor-sharp style of guitar playing, Cray was inducted into the Blues Hall of Fame in 2011. Carver Community Cultural Center, 8pm

Sunday, November 8

NOV 6 - BART CROW

Ezra Charles Presents “The Story of Boogie Woogie” Ezra Charles has

been fronting one of Houston’s betterknown bands with his piano since the early ’80s, winning annual readers' polls for best piano/keyboards seven times. With the end of an era 30 years ago Ezra embarked on “The Story of Boogie Woogie,” in which Charles performs many of his classic piano hits that define boogie woogie. Sam’s Burger Joint, 3pm

NOV 7 - JASON JAMES

Monday, November 9 Swing Nite with The Octanes The

Octanes play mostly original material, heavily rooted in hillbilly, while revving up the traditional sound with driving rhythms, and a big guitar sound. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm

Tuesday, November 10

NOV 13- MERLE HAGGARD

The Psychedelic Furs Led by frontman

and songwriter Richard Butler, the Furs won over fans and critics alike by combining poetic lyrics, innovative rhythms and melodies driven by an aggressive, punk desperation. Through it all, the band scored major hits with “Love My Way,” “Pretty In Pink,” “Heaven,” “The Ghost In You,” and “Heartbreak Beat.” Aztec Theatre, 7pm

NOV 14 - TURNPIKE TROUBADOURS

The Wonder Years, Motion City Soundtrack, State Champs, You Blew It! The soundtrack to millions of

high school make-out sessions in the backseat of mom’s Volvo. Even if “You Blew It!” is a reference to Billy Madison, it’s still a shit name on par with all the other shitty names that millenials can’t seem to get over, looking at you Not In The Face, Diarrhea Planet, We Were Promised Jetpacks. Alamo City Music Hall, 6pm

502 Bar 502 Embassy Oaks, (210) 257-8125, 502bar.com Alamo City Music Hall 1305 E. Houston St., (800) 513-8720 alamocitymusichall.com Aztec Theatre 104 N. St. Mary’s St. (210) 812-4355, theaztectheatre.com Carmens de la Calle 320 N. Flores, (210) 281-4349, carmensdelacalle.com Carver Community Cultural Center 226 N. Hackberry St., (210) 207-7211, thecarver. org Cowboys Dancehall 3030 NE Interstate 410 Loop, (210) 646-9378, cowboysdancehall.com/san-antonio Floore’s Country Store 14492 Old Bandera Road, (210) 695-8827, liveatfloores.com Limelight 2718 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-7775, thelimelightsa.com Luna 6740 San Pedro Ave., (210) 804-2433, lunalive.com Paper Tiger 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com Sancho’s Cantina 628 Jackson St., (210) 320-1840, sanchosmx.com Sound Crater Recording and Rehearsal 1908 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 837-1850, facebook.com/soundcraterrecording Sam’s Burger Joint 330 E. Grayson St., (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com The Korova 107 E. Martin St., (210) 226-5070, thekorova.com The Mix 2403 N. St. Mary’s St., (210)735-1313

NOV 20 - DAVID ALLAN COE

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DEAR READERS: Two weeks ago, I announced I would be taking a nice long break from questions about miserable sexless marriages. (I don’t get questions about hapwwpily sexless marriages.) I tossed out my standard line of advice to those who’ve exhausted medical, psychological, and situational fixes (“Do what you need to do to stay married and stay sane”), and I moved on to other relationship problems. Readers impacted by sexless marriages — men and women on “both sides of the bed” — wrote in to share their experiences and insights. I’ve decided to let them have the last word on the subject. Since you don’t want to give any more advice to readers stuck in sexually unfulfilling marriages they can’t or don’t want to end, will you allow me to give a little advice from the perspective of the other woman, i.e., the person who makes it possible for them to “stay married and stay sane”? I contacted an old flame when my marriage ended. He was married. His wife refused to have sex with him but also expected him to stay faithful to her. Their kids were still in school. He honestly believed that staying together was the best thing for the kids. I went into it thinking it was going to be a fling, a temporary thing to get me over my husband and back in the game. But the sex was mindblowingly good. And here’s the thing about amazing sex: It bonds people. We fell in love all over again. He told me our affair made his sexless marriage bearable. He was happier and a more patient father, he bickered less with his wife. He made me feel beautiful, desirable, known, and accepted — all feelings that had been lacking in my marriage. But I was in the shadows. Every assignation was a risk. I couldn’t introduce him to my friends, my son, or my family. After four years, I couldn’t take it anymore. My ego was shredded. So I ended it. I was tired of the fear, lying and hiding, and being secondary.

SAVAGE LOVE by Dan Savage

My advice to readers stuck in sexless marriages who cheat to “stay sane”: Beware of unintended consequences. You can have an affair with the most discreet, careful partner who accepts your circumstances, who makes no demands, who provides you with both a warm body to fuck and the passion that has drained out of your marriage. You can be careful not to get caught. It might be incredible for a while. But the chances of nothing going wrong and of everyone remaining happy over the long term are vanishingly small. It’s a matter of time before someone gets hurt. Ruby Tuesday I’m the “other man” to a woman whose husband won’t fuck her. The guy must be gay or asexual, because his wife is beautiful, smart, and great in bed. I’ve never wanted marriage or kids, so this arrangement works well for me. The only time it got awkward was when my girlfriend — this other guy’s wife — broached the subject of monogamy. Asking for a monogamous commitment when you’re married to someone else? Seemed nuts. But I hadn’t slept with anyone else for three years, or even wanted to, so I was already monogamous in practice. Monogamous In Theory Now Too You wrote that you’re sick of telling people trapped in sexless marriages to do what they need to do “to stay married and stay sane.” I want to thank you for all that repetition. I needed it. But leaving my sexless marriage was what I needed to do to stay sane. My husband of 10 years berated me publicly, telling anyone who would listen that I was a whore. Had I not had your corpus of work on the matter of marital partners who have zero interest in sex but still demand enthusiastic monogamy, the journey through this would have been longer. Four years later, I still get excited that I actually get to have sex — awesome, giving, experimental, fun sex. Gleeful Escapee mail@savagelove.net

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1 TV room 4 Decider in a tennis match, perhaps 13 Shiba ___ (such breed. many doge. wow.) 14 Hexadecimal 16 “Charlie’s Angels” director 17 #15 on AFI’s “100 Years ... 100 Movie Quotes,” from a 1982 film 18 Shake your hips 20 Drum kit components 21 Sluggish 22 Musical notes after mis 25 Dropbox files, often 26 Schwarzenegger movie based on a Philip K. Dick story 30 Tight-lipped 31 Sentiment akin to “Ain’t no shame in that!” 32 Phrase in French cookery 33 Pkg. measures 36 Lets in a view of 37 Photographer Goldin 38 Coaching legend Parseghian 39 Hairpieces in old portraits 41 Type of card for a smartphone 42 Travel widely 46 Actor Lukas of “Witness” 48 “Can’t Fight This Feeling” band ___ Speedwagon 49 Berkshire Hathaway headquarters

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DOWN

1 Dope 2 Setting for a 1992 Fraser/ Shore comedy 3 Pepsi Center player 4 Boarding pass datum 5 Source of a Shakespearean snake bite 6 “Whatevs” 7 That thing, to Torquemada 8 Wrestling victories 9 Animals in the game “The Oregon Trail” 10 “___ to Be You” 11 Like some buildings with arches and columns 12 California city where Erle Stanley Gardner wrote his Perry Mason novels

14 Guides around the waistline 15 “WKRP in Cincinnati” news director Les 19 #696969, in hexadecimal color code 22 Djokovic rival 23 Poisonous plant also known as monkshood 24 “Oh yeah?” 27 Calcutta coin 28 Army officer below captain, in slang 29 Flowering groundcover plants in the apt genus Pulmonaria 33 Clean 34 Dress rehearsal 35 2006 appointee, to friends 40 “Brave New World” feelgood drug 43 Best Western competitor 44 Some long-haired dogs, for short 45 Coca-Cola bottled water brand 47 Ground-based unit? 51 Cornell of Cornell University 52 Fr. holy women 53 “Consarnit!” 55 Some printers 56 He played “The Ugly” opposite Clint’s “The Good” and Lee’s “The Bad” 57 Monster container

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): In 1978, Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield began selling their new ice cream out of a refurbished gas station in Burlington, Vermont. Thirtyseven years later, Ben & Jerry’s is among the world’s best-selling ice cream brands. Its success stems in part from its willingness to keep transforming the way it does business. “My mantra is ‘Change is a wonderful thing,’” says the current CEO. As evidence of the company’s intention to keep re-evaluating its approach, there’s a “Flavor Graveyard” on its website, where it lists flavors it has tried to sell but ultimately abandoned. “Wavy Gravy,” “Tennessee Mud,” and “Turtle Soup” are among the departed. Now is a favorable time for you to engage in a purge of your own, Aries. What parts of your life don’t work any more? What personal changes would be wonderful things? TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): Before he helped launch Apple Computer in the 1970s, tech pioneer Steve Wozniak ran a dial-a-joke service. Most of the time, people who called got an automated recording, but now and then Wozniak answered himself. That’s how he met Alice Robertson, the woman who later became his wife. I’m guessing you will have comparable experiences in the coming weeks, Taurus. Future allies may come into your life in unexpected ways. It’s as if mysterious forces will be conspiring to connect you with people you need to know.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): Small, nondestructive earthquakes are common. Our planet has an average of 1,400 of them every day. This subtle underground mayhem has been going on steadily for millions of years. According to recent research, it has been responsible for creating 80 percent of the world’s gold. I suspect that the next six or seven months will feature a metaphorically analogous process in your life. You will experience deep-seated quivering and grinding that won’t bring major disruptions even as it generates the equivalent of gold deposits. Make it your goal to welcome and even thrive on the subterranean friction!

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): Here’s the process I went through to create your horoscope. First I drew up a chart of your astrological aspects. Using my analytical skills, I pondered their meaning. Next, I called on my intuitive powers, asking my unconscious mind to provide symbols that would be useful to you. The response I got from my deeper mind was surprising: It informed me that I should go to a new cafe that had just opened downtown. Ten minutes later, I was there, gazing at a menu packed with exotic treats: Banana Flirty Milk . . . Champagne Coconut Mango Slushy . . . Honey Dew Jelly Juice . . . Creamy Wild Berry Blitz . . . Sweet Dreamy Ginger Snow. I suspect these are metaphors for experiences that are coming your way. 64 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): The Beatles’ song “You Never Give Me Your Money” has this poignant lyric: “Oh, that magic feeling, nowhere to go.” I suggest you make it your motto for now. And if you have not yet begun to feel the allure of that sentiment, initiate the necessary shifts to get yourself in the mood. Why? Because it’s time to recharge your spiritual battery, and the best way to do that is to immerse yourself in the mystery of having nothing to do and nowhere to go. Put your faith in the pregnant silence, Leo. Let emptiness teach you what you need to know next.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): Should a professional singer be criticized for her lack of skill in laying bricks? Is it reasonable to chide a kindergarten teacher for his ineptitude as an airplane pilot? Does it make sense to complain about a cat’s inability to bark? Of course not. There are many other unwarranted comparisons that are almost as irrational but not as obviously unfair. Is it right for you to wish your current lover or best friend could have the same je ne sais quoi as a previous lover or best friend? Should you try to manipulate the future so that it’s more like the past? Are you justified in demanding that your head and your heart come to identical conclusions? No, no, and no. Allow the differences to be differences. And more than that: Celebrate them!

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): In the mid-19th century, an American named Cyrus McCormick patented a breakthrough that had the potential to revolutionize agriculture. It was a mechanical reaper that harvested crops with far more ease and efficiency than handheld sickles and scythes. But his innovation didn’t enter into mainstream use for 20 years. In part that was because many farmers were skeptical of trying a new technology, and feared it would eliminate jobs. I don’t foresee you having to wait nearly as long for acceptance of your new wrinkles, Libra. But you may have to be patient. SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): Is it possible to express a benevolent form of vanity? I say yes. In the coming weeks, your boasts may be quite lyrical and therapeutic. They may even uplift and motivate those who hear them. Acts of self-aggrandizement that would normally cast long shadows might instead produce generous results. That’s why I’m giving you a go-ahead to embody the following attitude from Nikki Giovanni’s poem “Ego Tripping (there may be a reason why)”: I am so perfect so divine so ethereal so surreal /I cannot be comprehended except by my permission.” SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): Regard the current tensions and detours as camouflaged gifts from the gods of growth.

You’re being offered a potent opportunity to counteract the effects of a self-sabotage you committed once upon a time. You’re getting an excellent chance to develop the strength of character that can blossom from dealing with soul-bending riddles. In fact, I think you’d be wise to feel a surge of gratitude right now. To do so will empower you to take maximum advantage of the disguised blessings.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19): You are slipping into a phase when new teachers are likely to appear. That’s excellent news, because the coming weeks will also be a time when you especially need new teachings. Your good fortune doesn’t end there. I suspect that you will have an enhanced capacity to learn quickly and deeply. With all these factors conspiring in your favor, Capricorn, I predict that by January 1, you will be smarter, humbler, more flexible, and better prepared to get what you want in 2016. AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18): American author Mark Twain seemed to enjoy his disgust with the novels of Jane Austen, who died 18 years before he was born. “Her books madden me so that I can’t conceal my frenzy,” he said, even as he confessed that

he had perused some of her work multiple times. “Every time I read Pride and Prejudice,” he wrote to a friend about Austen’s most famous story, “I want to dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin-bone.” We might ask why he repetitively sought an experience that bothered him. I am posing a similar question to you, Aquarius. According to my analysis, the coming weeks will be an excellent time to renounce, once and for all, your association with anything or anyone you are addicted to disliking.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): The Sahara in Northern Africa is the largest hot desert on the planet. It’s almost the size of the United States. Cloud cover is rare, the humidity is low, and the temperature of the sand can easily exceed 170º F. (80º C.). That’s why it was so surprising when snow fell there in February of 1979 for the first time in memory. This once-in-a-lifetime visitation happened again 33 years later. I’m expecting a similar anomaly in your world, Pisces. Like the desert snow, your version should be mostly interesting and only slightly inconvenient. It may even have an upside. Saharan locals testified that the storm helped the palm trees because it killed off the parasites feeding on them.

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

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