Creative Loafing Tampa — April 13, 2023

PUBLISHER James Howard

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa

DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf

MANAGING EDITOR Kyla Fields

FOOD and THEATER CRITIC

Jon Palmer Claridge

FILM & TV CRITIC John W. Allman

IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl

CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Kate

Oberdorfer, Arielle Stevenson

Story

PHOTOGRAPHERS Nick Cardello, Dave Decker

SPRING INTERN Tyana Rodgers

Apply for summer via rroa@cltampa.com

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CREATIVE DIRECTOR Jack Spatafora

GRAPHIC DESIGNER Joe Frontel

ILLUSTRATORS Dan Perkins, Cory Robinson, Bob Whitmore

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES

Anthony Carbone, Scott Zepeda

SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping wild dangerous. But even though public many don’t see a parallel between the kind and the practice of displaying animals asking for too much? Or is it time for a “entertainment” animals?

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS DIRECTOR

Alexis Quinn Chamberlain

at SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping wild and dangerous. But even though public widespread, many don’t see a parallel between the kind Vick and the practice of displaying animals activists asking for too much? Or is it time for a “entertainment” animals?

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS COORDINATOR Lauren Caplinger

EUCLID MEDIA GROUP

CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER

Andrew Zelman

Music: Tampa Bay Blues Fest 40

CHIEF OPERATING OFFICERS

Chris Keating, Michael Wagner

EXECUTIVE EDITOR Sarah Fenske

Music: Tampa Bay Blues Fest 40 Music Week ...................................................42 Concert review: Artic Monkeys 42

VP OF DIGITAL SERVICES Stacy Volhein

REGIONAL OPERATIONS DIRECTOR

Hollie Mahadeo

DIGITAL OPERATIONS COORDINATOR

Jaime Monzon euclidmediagroup.com

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EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa is a publication covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum. They do not necessarily represent the views

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Mr. & Mrs. B are moving to their next chapter.

Chief’s Creole closes in St. Pete, p. 38.

Cloud lime

Photos by Nick Cardello

You came, you saw, and drank so much you had to leave in an Uber. Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s Margarita Wars went down last Friday, taking your sobriety along with it. Tampa restaurant Jotoro stumbled away winner of the fan-vote with its “Cloud 9” margarita featuring El Tesoro Reposado, fresh lime juice, fresh orange, and cream soda poured over cotton candy with a dragon fruit dust rim. Coming in second and third were Booze & Bubbles’ “Spicy Cucumber Margarita” and Hotel Tampa Riverwalk’s “Smokin-Rita.” Have a look at more of Nick’s photos from the event at T. Pepin Hospitality Centre via cltampa.com/slideshows.—Ray Roa

do this

Tampa Bay's best things to do from April 13 - 19

Cambodian New Year pop-up St. Pete sake bar, listening room and intimate restaurant In Between Days already hosts a variety of events, but it’s stepping up in a big way with the launch of its monthly Supper Club pop-ups. Its next event commemorates the Cambodian New Year with innovative and personal dishes from Chef Silas Eng. “My mother was a war prisoner during Cambodia’s civil war and barely escaped with her life. Her fortitude gave me the life I have now and I am honored to share the dishes of my roots,” Eng says about his New Year’s dinner. The six course, prefixe dinner will feature dishes like grilled lemongrass beef skewers, papaya salad, shrimp dumplings, Cambodian-infused NY strips and mango sticky rice for dessert. Admission also includes a sake pairing from In Between Days. Sunday, April 16. 5:30 p.m.-7:30 p.m. & 8 p.m.-10 p.m. $120. In Between Days, 2340 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. inbetweendays.co

—Kyla Fields

TAK DARA/ADOBE CANNONBALL

Seltzerland After staging a socially-distant party on suburban golf courses over the last two years, Seltzerland is coming to the big city with a parking lot party at Willa’s in the NoHo neighborhood of Hyde Park. Seltzerland 2023 promises a new “fiesta-filled experience” that includes a “CANtina” complete with guacamole and tequila-infused drinks. The outside experience will feature more than 100 hard seltzers, according to a press release, with brands like Casa Azul, Viva Tequila, PLANT Botanical, SABÈ. Guests can expect a live DJ, Instagrammable moments and activities like ladder ball and seltzer pong. Saturday, April 15. Noon-7 p.m. $39 & up. Willa’s, 700 W Fig St., Tampa. seltzerland.com

—Tyana Rodgers

Creator Clash 2 Last year the event sold out the 10,000-seat Yuengling Center, and pulled over 100,000 payper-views while raising over $1.3 million for charity, according to a press release. After the huge success of the inaugural Clash, the highlyanticipated influencer boxing matches move to the 21,500-capacity Amalie Arena while a pay-per-view livestream goes down on Moment. Instead of money-grabbing, Creator Clash 2 puts a positive spin on the clout chase by raising money for charity. Some names set to fight include iDubbbz, Alex Wassabi, Harley Morenstein and John Hennigan, Fitz and Ididathing, Froggy Fresh and Chris Ray Gun, plus Myth and Hundar. Saturday, April 15, 6 p.m. $30 & up. Amalie Arena, 401 Channelside Dr., Tampa. amaliearena.com—Tyana Rodgers

ALEXWASSABI/TWITTER

One-Man Comedy After making its Tampa Bay debut at freeFall last fall, J. Elijah Cho brings his award-winning comedy ‘Mr. Yunioshi’ to Ybor City. The play, which won best solo show at the Hollywood Fringe Festival, features the Tampa expat as Mickey Rooney, the white actor infamous for his racist character in “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” Cho explores Rooney’s character in the original film and begs the questions, “What compels an actor to play a character that they really shouldn’t be playing?” through clever satire and humor. Wednesday, April 19 (7:30 p.m) and next Thursday, April 20 (2 p.m.). $20 (free for HCC students, faculty and staff). Studio Theater at Hillsborough Community College. 1411 E 15th St., Ybor City. hccfl.edu—Chloe Greenberg

29th annual Pest Festo Sweetwater Organic Farm is a local hub for fresh produce, educational seminars, and the occasional live band. But this weekend, the local farm—located outside of Town ‘N Country—transforms into a party venue and fundraiser. Pesto Festo is Sweetwater’s yearly celebration of agriculture and community that happens each spring to honor the end of Florida’s planting season (which typically runs from September-March). This “end of season” party will feature Sweetwater’s “famous farm-fresh organic pesto pasta” alongside zoodles for the gluten-free folks, pizza, salad, desserts, juice, coffee and locallybrewed kombucha. Adults are also encouraged to BYOB, too. In addition to the wide spread of organic, local eats, 2023’s Pesto Festo will also feature family-friendly activities, raffles, a silent auction and live music from local act. Saturday, April 15. $5-$50. 6 p.m.-9 p.m. Sweetwater Organic Farm, 6942 W Comanche Ave., Tampa. sweetwater-organic.org—Kyla Fields

Baskerville I don’t know what impelled farceur playwright Ken Ludwig to use Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s “Sherlock Holmes” as a springboard for his delightful brand of silliness, but it’s an inspired choice. And in the hands of the breathtaking five-member ensemble portraying 40-plus characters at freeFall, the collision of cerebral murder mystery and delicious farce makes Baskerville a must see. Elementary, dear reader. Elementary. Select dates through April 23. $25-$45. freeFall Theatre. 6099 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. freefalltheatre.com—Jon Palmer Claridge

Old Northeast “Art in the Garden” Tour It’s no secret that the Old Northeast neighborhood is one of St. Pete’s prettiest districts, but you’ll have the chance to get an intimate look at some of its humble abodes at this weekend’s inaugural “Art in the Garden” tour. Hosted by the Historic Old Northeast Neighborhood Association (HONNA), the tour features a leisurely stroll through luscious residential gardens, historic homes and brick streets. Local musicians will play backyards and gardens alongside art from St. Petebased painters, ceramists and photographers. “The Historic Old Northeast neighborhood is famous for its array of historic home styles, quaint brick streets and beautiful oak tree canopies. What might not be as well-known is the abundance of beautiful residential gardens and talented artists,” HONNA’s website reads. Food and drinks will be available for purchase, too. Saturday, April 15. $30. 1 p.m.-4 p.m. 655 16th Ave. NE, St Petersburg. honna.org—Kyla Fields

Seeking counsel

Tampa City Council OKs funds for independent police review board lawyer.

By Arielle Stevenson

After years of pleas from the community, Tampa City Council voted 4-3 last week in favor of an ordinance allowing the Citizens Review Board (CRB) to hire its own outside legal counsel. The budget for the appointment is up to $100,000 and comes from the general fund. Councilmembers Lynn Hurtak, Bill Carlson, Luis Viera, and Orlando Gudes voted to approve the measure.

“This is something the people continuously tell us they want,” council member Hurtak said during the vote last Thursday. “It will help citizens build and develop trust that many say is lacking.”

Last July, Tampa City Council voted 5-1 to have the city’s legal team create an ordinance providing an outside attorney to the Citizens Review Board and subpoena power to obtain its own evidence. Mayor Jane Castor has opposed both changes to the CRB. In October, then-Tampa Police Chief Mary O’Connor (who resigned last December after she was caught on camera flashing her badge to escape a traffic violation,) met with city council members.

O’Connor urged council to oppose the expansion of CRB powers going to a public vote. Her work paid off, only days later city council voted 4-3 against giving citizens the right to vote on CRB subpoena power. Another measure for providing outside legal counsel passed 4-2 with Maniscalco and Citro voting against.

president Dr. Ken Atwater. Of the 219 voting FUSA members, 209 voted in favor of the “no confidence,” and just 10 members opposed.

Sheryl Sippel, president of FUSA and HCC mathematics professor, told CL that the faculty needs a raise.

“Our minimum starting salary has only increased $1,700 in 15 years,” Sippel said. “Our starting salary with a bachelor’s degree in 2008 was $40,487. In 2023, it’s $42,187.”

Sippel called the no confidence vote “a last resort,” and said faculty had tried to resolve the issues through bargaining and discussions with Atwater, who’s been leading the college since July 1, 2010. FUSA even went to HCC’s board of trustees four times with concerns.

And this isn’t the first time FUSA cast a “no confidence” vote since Atwater took over in 2010. The first time was in 2015, which led to the creation of a faculty step pay system.

LOCAL NEWS

Beginning in 2016, the 30-year step pay system had two components: a pay increase every year of teaching for experience and a periodic cost of living wage increase. “We felt it was going to resolve a lot of issues,” Sippel added.

to recruit and retain qualified faculty. In comments submitted by FUSA members to HCC’s board, many echoed concerns about cost of living, stagnant wages, and overwhelming workloads.

“I am living paycheck to paycheck and teaching overloads every semester and every summer, and we are told not to depend on overload,”Suzy DeVore, tenured theater professor at HCC wrote. “If I did not teach overload, I would not be able to pay my bills.”

Following the vote, board of trustees chairperson Nancy Watkins told Atwater to bring back a detailed workshop on the matter.

CL reached out to Atwater for comment, but instead heard back from Angela Walters Eveillard, Director of Marketing & Strategic Communications at HCC who wrote that, “We are still in negotiations and look forward to finding a resolution.”

Sippel says FUSA hopes to come to a “quick resolution,” too.

recent decision by the Florida Board of Governors to approve an emergency regulation to “block access to applications and social media platforms that may put personal information and national security at risk.”

Most everything on the internet harvests demographic information about users, but TikTok has recently come under fire over concerns that the Chinese government could order the app’s developer ByteDance to hand over user data.

The email said USF is implementing measures affecting students, faculty and staff who will no longer be able to use the apps on university-owned devices or networks.

“Access to these applications through USF’s wired and wireless networks from personal devices will be blocked unless an exception is granted under the regulation,” the email added. Other apps being blocked by USF’s campuses in Tampa and St. Petersburg include Chinese

“It benefits everybody to have some additional level of objectivity,” council member Carlson said from the dais during the April 6 city council meeting.

Meanwhile, the Department of Justice continues its probe into the Tampa Police Department’s (TPD) “crime-free multi-housing program,” which targeted mainly Black renters for eviction. Last month, city council members agreed to access information about the investigation as long as they don’t disclose the information publicly.

Faculty union at Hillsborough Community College casts vote of ‘no confidence’ in college president

Last month, Hillsborough Community College’s union, Faculty United Service Association or FUSA, cast a vote of “no confidence,” in HCC

A minimum and a maximum increase was included in the plan from 2016-2019. Under Atwater, FUSA says those wages remain stagnant after almost eight years. The administration got its own step pay system in 2019 and implemented a salary study recommendation for a 30% increase over three years. That was supposed to end in 2022 and faculty salaries were set to increase beginning this year.

“The college has made it clear that those 30% pay range increases are necessary to recruit and retain qualified administrators,” Sippel said. “This is the year where they were absolutely supposed to address faculty payments that needed to be increased. And there was no money in the budget.”

Sippel and fellow HCC FUSA members believe their wage increases are also needed

University of South Florida is now blocking TikTok, WeChat and other apps

Following in the footsteps of many other American universities, the University of South Florida announced plans to block access to TikTok, WeChat and three other apps. An email from USF’s IT department obtained by CL cites a

messaging app Tencent QQ, Russian social network VKontakte, and the Russian cybersecurity software Kaspersky.

Other Florida schools that implemented TikTok bans last week include Florida A&M, the University of Florida and Florida State University.—Ray Roa

“This is something the people continuously tell us they want.”

PELOW MEDIA/ADOBE

REVIEW THE BLUE: Tampa City Council voted 4-3 to let the CRB have its own attorney.

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On second thought

St. Pete City Council votes against funding increased abortion access.

By Arielle Stevenson

Last week, St. Pete City Council voted against providing $50,000 in funding to the Tampa Bay Abortion Fund (TBAF) for practical services. The motion was made by council member Richie Floyd and seconded by council member Deborah Figgs-Sanders—who both cast the only yes votes to approve the funding.

“Abortions are not going to stop when they pass this ban,” Floyd said. “They’re not going to, science has shown it over and over again, that when abortion is illegal it happens at the same rates it does when it’s legal.”

According to the World Health Organization, unsafe abortion is the leading but preventable cause of most maternal deaths.

The council did vote 6-2 to approve a reproductive rights resolution, with councilmember Ed Montanari and Gina Driscoll opposing. The reproductive rights resolution was written with guidance from St. Petersburg Police Chief Anthony Holloway. The resolution asks local

law enforcement to not violate state or federal laws, but does ask to de-prioritize investigations into possible reproductive matters under the right to privacy.

Councilman Floyd introduced both items to the Health, Energy, Resiliency, and Sustainability (HERS) committee back in December. In February, the HERS committee approved both items to go to the full council for a vote. Even then, Welch’s administration had expressed concerns over the possible funding. That’s despite Chief Assistant City Attorney Jeannine Williams stating multiple times that her interpretation of current law is favorable to the funding. Council chair Brandi Gabbard had been in support of the proposal back in February. That changed after she went to Tallahassee this month.

very clear that punitive issues will come down,” Gabbard said. “Disney is living through punitive leadership, [ousted Hillsborough State Attorney] Andrew Warren is living through punitive leadership. We saw Nikki Fried and Lauren Book get arrested early this week.”

LOCAL NEWS

Gabbard voted against the measure.

The vote came after Republican representatives Berny Jacques of Seminole and Mike Beltran of Manatee wrote a letter to Mayor Ken Welch and HERS Committee Chair Driscoll. Beltran and Jacques, neither of whom represent St. Petersburg, threatened to defund the city. Driscoll, who had previously greenlit the proposal, said today that she no longer thinks the risk is worth it.

responsibilities to our great community, including our duty to review and debate all issues of importance to our City without regard to threats and attempts to intimidate.”

“This allocation has the potential to create many more problems than it will solve,” Driscoll said before voting against the proposal she advocated for less than six weeks ago.

Florida’s six-week abortion ban has language that is seemingly aimed at the exact kind of funding proposed by St. Pete. The legislation already passed in the senate, and awaits approval in the GOP-led house still before it heads to Gov. Ron DeSantis. The law would also ban state dollars via city governments used to assist those seeking out-of-state abortions.

“This was all anyone wanted to talk about and representatives from both parties were

Welch pushed back on Twitter, writing, “I, as Mayor, the St. Petersburg City Council, and the St. Pete residents we serve, embrace our

“I will not compromise my values because of threats,” Floyd said. “I will not be blackmailed into not doing what I think is right. I will not cede an inch of ground to authoritarians seeking to silence dissent and erode our rights.”

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Speak now

Florida health official must testify in transgender Medicaid fight, says federal judge.

By Dara Kam/News Service of Florida

Afederal judge has rejected a request by Gov. Ron DeSantis’ administration to shield a top health official from testifying in a lawsuit challenging the state’s prohibition on Medicaid coverage of genderaffirming care for transgender people. State attorneys have been wrangling with plaintiffs’ lawyers seeking to depose Agency for Health Care Administration

order to block Weida’s deposition, finding that he likely has “relevant, indeed significant, information not available from other sources.”

FLORIDA NEWS

Secretary Jason Weida, arguing that, under what is known as the “apex doctrine,” Weida should not have to testify because he is a high-ranking official.

But U.S. District Judge Robert Hinkle last Tuesday denied the state’s request for a protective

Before his appointment as secretary this year, Weida was the agency’s assistant deputy secretary for Medicaid policy and Medicaid quality at a time when it developed a rule that blocked payments to health-care providers for treatments such as puberty blockers, hormone therapy and surgeries for transgender people.

The agency adopted the rule last summer, basing its decision, at least in part, on a report concluding that the targeted treatments are “not consistent with generally accepted

professional medical standards and are experimental and investigational.”

A group of plaintiffs filed a federal lawsuit in September challenging the rule. The plaintiffs’ legal team has clashed with the agency’s lawyers, who balked at releasing documents and other information. While some records have been protected from public scrutiny, others show that Weida was an architect of the report and was instrumental in the creation of the rule.

The records showed Weida “had perhaps the most prominent role” in the promulgation of the rule, the plaintiffs’ lawyers argued in a March 29 response to the state’s request for a protective order to shield Weida from being deposed.

Weida “personally chose” the experts who contributed to the report and “had many private conversations with these consultants (and perhaps others) where he shaped the contents of their reports … Within AHCA, Mr. Weida was the face of the antitransgender push, controlling the organization’s messaging,” the plaintiffs’ response said.

Hinkle’s ruling pointed to documents and testimony detailing Weida’s role.

“The record includes documentary evidence from which one could conclude that some consultants and experts were advocates more than witnesses and that Mr. Weida himself had communications directly with them,” Hinkle wrote.

continued on page 29

TRANS-PARENTS: Hinkle ruled against DeSantis’ administration again.

continued from page 26

“At Mr. Weida’s insistence, some of the communications occurred only by telephone, ensuring that nobody else would know their contents.”

The judge also wrote that the “process by which this rule was adopted—including whether the required public hearing was just a charade to support a predetermined result—is relevant. Whether the consultants who appeared in support of the rule were hired not for their expertise but for their predetermined viewpoint is relevant. Whether the experts who will testify for the defense at the trial were coached by Mr. Weida is relevant.”

The plaintiffs contend in the lawsuit that treatment of gender dysphoria is “medically necessary, safe and effective” for transgender children and adults. The federal government defines gender dysphoria as clinically “significant distress that a person may feel when sex or gender assigned at birth is not the same as their identity.”

The lawsuit alleges that the state’s prohibition on Medicaid coverage for gender dysphoria is unconstitutional and violates federal laws prohibiting discrimination based on sex. Costs of surgeries, services and medications can run to thousands of dollars per month.

The plaintiffs, who include adults, children and the children’s parents, are being represented by groups including Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund, Inc., Southern Legal Counsel, Inc., Florida Health Justice Project and National Health Law Program and the Pillsbury Winthrop Shaw Pittman, LLP firm.

DeSantis’ administration has authorized more than $1.3 million for legal and expert-witness fees in the dispute, according to a review of state records by The News Service of Florida shows.

The expert witness costs in the case are being run through the Holtzman Vogel Baran Torchinsky & Josefiak, PLLC law firm. The Agency for Health Care Administration in July approved a $950,000 contract with the firm to represent the state in the litigation. The firm previously signed separate contracts totaling $28,830 for “legal counsel and representation in matters including but not limited to Medicaid rulemaking and subsequent litigation.” The state has paid Holzman $514,456.53 thus far, the records show.

Florida is among Republican-led states embracing numerous measures to restrict or limit transgender care for minors and adults. DeSantis, who is widely viewed as a potential front-runner in the 2024 GOP presidential race, has elevated the issue by frequently raising it in speeches and calling gender-affirming treatment “child mutilation.”

In addition to the ban on Medicaid reimbursements, the DeSantis administration and the GOP-controlled Florida Legislature are targeting care for transgender people in other ways.

For example, at the request of the DeSantis administration, state medical boards adopted rules banning doctors from using gender-affirming care such as puberty blockers, hormone

therapy and surgeries to treat minors diagnosed with gender dysphoria. The boards’ rules also are being challenged in federal court.

Meanwhile, the state Senate this week approved a measure that would enshrine the boards’ rules into Florida law and impose some restrictions on treatment for transgender adults. The bill also is expected to pass the House.

Florida Senate passes bill banning doctors from providing puberty blockers, hormone treatments

to trans minors

The Florida Senate last Tuesday passed a plan that would bar doctors and other health-care providers from offering treatments such as puberty blockers and hormone therapy to transgender minors. The bill (SB 254) would largely put into law rules approved by state medical boards, but it also could lead to felony charges for doctors who provide the treatments to minors.

Bill sponsor Clay Yarborough, R-Jacksonville, said the treatments, which also could involve surgery, are “experimental” when provided to children.

“I believe we need to let kids be kids,” Yarborough said. “And our laws need to set appropriate boundaries that respect the rights and responsibilities of parents while protecting children from the very serious health and safety concerns associated with these treatments.”

But Democratic lawmakers said major national medical associations support genderaffirming care for transgender minors and that the bill is part of broader efforts in legislatures across the country to target LGBTQ youths. Rep. Tina Polsky, D-Boca Raton, called the bill “persecution, plain and simple.”

“I will not co-sign on vilifying young people who are trying just to be who they are, vilifying parents when they want to seek gender-affirming care, vilifying physicians who provide this care,” Sen. Geraldine Thompson, D-Windermere, said.

The Republican-controlled Senate voted 27-12 along almost-straight party lines to pass the bill. Sen. Gayle Harrell, R-Stuart, joined Democrats in opposing the bill. The bill now will go to the House, where it is expected to pass.

“I don’t think that young people should have their bodies mutilated until they have a chance to make a decision,” House Speaker Paul Renner, R-Palm Coast, told reporters earlier Tuesday. “And when they’re adults, if that’s what they choose to do, then we support them in that decision. … And I think everybody in this room, everybody listening, knows that when you are a child developmentally, you are not ready to make those determinations.”

Also, Gov. Ron DeSantis has made the issue a priority, frequently calling gender-affirming care “child mutilation.”

But Sen. Lori Berman, D-Boca Raton, alluded to DeSantis and GOP lawmakers often touting the “free” state of Florida.

“Free states don’t ban health care,” Berman said. “This state should not be stepping in to

override parents’ decisions about health care for their children. The bill strips Florida parents of the right to follow the evidence-based advice of health-care providers to provide the best care for their transgender child.”

The issue centers, in part, on treatment for gender dysphoria, which the federal government defines clinically as “significant distress that a person may feel when sex or gender assigned at birth is not the same as their identity,”

The legislation came after the Florida Board of Medicine and the Florida Board of Osteopathic Medicine, at the urging of the DeSantis administration, adopted rules that prevent doctors from providing the treatments to minors. Those rules went into effect last month.

The bill includes an exemption for children currently receiving puberty blockers or hormone therapy to treat gender dysphoria.

But it also would require the medical boards to create rules to establish standards of care for transgender children currently receiving the treatments.

While adults would be able to receive the treatments, the bill includes additional restrictions. For example, adults would have to sign consent forms that would be developed by the medical boards. Also, the bill would prevent the use of telehealth in providing treatments.

Republican lawmakers and the DeSantis administration have made a series of controversial decisions in recent years about LGBTQrelated issues. As an example, the DeSantis administration last year stopped Medicaid reimbursements for gender-affirming treatment for minors and adults, a move that has been challenged in federal court.—Jim Turner/ News Service of Florida

STATE OF FLORIDA

DEFECTOR : Sen. Gayle Harrell, R-Stuart, joined Democrats in opposing SB 254.

“Free states don’t ban health care.”

WEDNESDAY 05

Shit Happened

Florida officials warn residents to prepare for wildfire season. That means no fireworks on the Fourth of July, right?

MONDAY 10

A Republican-controlled committee backed Florida’s SB 1096, which would allow supporters of Confederate monuments to sue over removal or destruction of the displays. Who wants a statue commemorating losers?

THURSDAY 06

After years of pleas from the community, Tampa City Council voted 4-3 in favor of an ordinance allowing the Citizens Review Board to hire its own outside legal counsel. The city did not devolve into anarchy.

Florida Republican Webster Barnaby calls trans people ‘mutants’ and ‘demons’ on the House floor. He is literally an X-Men villain in the flesh.

A Florida House committee advanced a proposal that would prohibit businesses and government agencies from requiring people to take COVID-19 tests or wear masks to enter their facilities. Freedom, amirite?

More shit, wiping shit on a statue of Robert E. Lee, via cltampa.com/news.

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FOOD NEWS

Eggs & Kegs

10th anniversary brunch

Sunday, April 16.11 a.m. $43. 7venth Sun Brewery, 6809 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa. lokocuisine.com

RESTAURANTS RECIPES DINING GUIDES

Lokal eats

Tampa pop-up Loko Cuisine celebrates 10 years of Eggs & Kegs.

By Kyla Fields

In Tampa Bay’s bustling culinary scene there’s both brick and mortar restaurants and food trucks—but sometimes the most exciting dishes hail from local pop-ups. With small-batch eats and rotating menus of specialties, chefs have the creative control to explore innovative flavors and the space to execute them—and one of Tampa’s longest-running pop-ups is about to celebrate the 10th anniversary of its most popular event.

A Sunday morning brunch pop-up loaded with a hearty, but creative spread of beer-friendly eats, Eggs & Kegs, happens at different breweries throughout the Bay area each month.

Loko Cuisine (stylized “LOKO”) has been hosting its Eggs & Kegs event at Tampa Bay breweries for a decade, and owner John LoScalzo is pulling out all the stops for this weekend’s celebratory brunch.

“I mainly pop up at breweries that don’t have their own food programs, it’s always just worked out really well,” LoScalzo tells Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “I get to serve my food and the brewery gets to sell beer—it’s just a perfect marriage, you know?”

A few of its regular venues include Bastet Brewing, Green Bench Brewing Co. Another favorite, 7venth Sun Brewing, hosts this weekend’s brunch party.

Loko Cuisine’s 10th anniversary Eggs & Kegs happens on Sunday, April 16 at Tampa’s 7venth Sun Brewery, located at 6809 N Nebraska Ave. Tickets run for $43 and can be purchased at lokocuisine.com. All tickets include a complimentary craft beer (or other beverage), coffee and tea from Bright Land Coffee and access to Loko’s prized brunch eats. In addition to this weekend’s anniversary brunch, LOKO Cuisine hosts two exclusive events next month: a Cinco de Mayo dinner at 7venth Sun and a “Hair of the Dog” brunch at newly-opened Seminole Heights brewery Common Dialect.

A specific theme runs through each Eggs & Kegs menu, usually influenced by that month’s holiday or what season it happens in. LoScalzo tells CL that this weekend’s anniversary gig

will be a culinary homage to Tampa, his home of over a decade. Guests can expect Tampafied breakfast dishes like chorizo biscuits and gravy, Spanish-style omelets and his beloved french toast loaded with cinnamon maple cream cheese frosting, barrel-aged tres leches drizzle and Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal.

Since french toast is a staple item on LoScalzo’s brunch menus, 7venth Sun Brewery is releasing its “Quin-TOAST-ssential” whiskey barrel-aged french toast stout to celebrate the 10th birthday of Eggs & Kegs. This rich stout

including a cranberry, orange, cinnamon and vanilla Berliner and a raspberry lemonade fruited gose. Like his website states, “there’s a beer for every occasion and every meal.”

Although Eggs & Kegs is coming up on its 10th birthday, 49-year-old LoScalzo has been cooking for Tampeños for about 15 years. His deep love of food and hospitality has existed for far longer. His father operated the landmark restaurant Elmwood Plantation in his birthplace of New Orleans, but LoScalzo also inherited a love of Sicilian cooking from his grandmother and an appreciation for southern cuisine from his mother.

Eggs & Kegs first came into fruition 10-ish years ago when LoScalzo pitched his laid-back

In addition to Cigar City, Eggs & Kegs used to frequent Coppertail Brewing before the two Tampa breweries adopted food programs and no longer needed the draw of pop-ups.

LoScalzo says he hasn’t missed a monthly brunch in 10 years, which is especially impressive considering he’s worked a full-time day job for the entirety of LOKO Cuisine’s existence.

For over 23 years, he’s had a day job at Hillsborough County Schools, helping students with disabilities transition post-high school.

While his wife Stephanie Kojima (whose last name is the “KO” in “LOKO”) and a few other employees help LoScalzo run the popups, he typically preps for 150-plus brunchers in a commercial commissary kitchen all by himself. And although he can cook dishes from just about anywhere in the world, he says that his go-to cuisine is usually Italian, Latin or Asian-fusion.

“If someone asked if I knew how to do a certain cuisine, I’ll say yes even if I’m not exactly sure—but I’ll research and do it anyway,” LoScalzo laughs.

“I’d like to do an Indian-themed brunch one of these days—I have ideas of tikka masala biscuits and gravy and other fun dishes.”

With restaurants in Tampa Bay opening and closing at a rapid rate, it’s encouraging to see a small, locallyowned pop-up thriving in a niche that it ultimately created for itself.

Although his events have gotten more organized and streamlined over the years, he doesn’t see much structural change happening in the future. As the old saying goes, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” and Loko Cuisine's monthly pop-ups have been satisfying both LoScalzo’s creative mind and the bellies of his happy brunchers for a solid decade.

with hints of vanilla, cinnamon, and maple will be available both in cans and on draft at Sunday’s brunch.

And if you’re an Eggs & Kegs newcomer, seeing a barrel-aged french toast might surprise you, but LoScalzo often incorporates beer or other spirits into his dishes. Over the years, LoScalzo says that he and 7venth Sun have collaborated on various craft beers together,

brunch idea to Cigar City founder and Tampa legend Joe Redner, who was intrigued at the concept. Redner liked the first few brunches so much that he recruited Loko to host Eggs & Kegs monthly.

For the first five years, Cigar City was the sole home of Eggs & Kegs, but LoScalzo eventually started popping up at other breweries throughout the Bay.

And while he loves his full-time teaching gig, he has pondered the idea of opening his own restaurant.

“I thought about doing a brick and mortar, but at this point it’s too late to back out of teaching, and it would be too much to handle doing both,” LoScalzo explains.

“Opening a restaurant is incredibly risky, so these pop-ups have really worked out for me.”

“It’s just a perfect marriage, you know?”

JOE PEARL

BRUNCH BABES: John LoScalzo (center) is known for his innovative and playful dishes.

Farewell, Chief’s

A St. Pete staple closes, plus more foodie news.

By Kyla Fields

In St. Pete’s bustling foodie scene, it’s no secret that restaurants tend to come and go. But last week, The Burg’ lost one of its culinary gems. The owners of Chief’s Creole Cafe— located at 901 22nd St. S— took to Facebook to announce the immediate closure of their southern restaurant.

“Mr. & Mrs. B are moving to their next chapter. We wish to thank our staff for their dedication, loyalty, and commitment,” the restaurant’s social media reads. “We will retain the facility and it will be available to any entrepreneur who would like or need a venue.”

Safety Harbor gem. The closure also means there’s no place to Tampa Bay to get Gregario’s signature “garlic schmoo” (garlic, olive oil, salt, lemon).

It took almost a year and a half for Seymour to reopen post-Covid, and his snowbird-like approach to the business usually left the pizzeria closed during the scorching summer months.

According to the Pinellas County Appraiser’s website, the bright yellow Pizzeria Gregario building at 400 2nd St. N was sold to Miamibased Harbor House Investments LLC for $255,000 back in February.

OPENINGS & CLOSINGS

The southside restaurant was known for its variety of flavorpacked dishes like jambalaya, fluffy beignets, crawfish fritters, gumbo and red beans and rice alongside many other Creole entrees. Just late last year, the southern restaurant expanded its dinner hours and added a wide spread of vegan dishes to its menu.

Elihu and Carolyn Brayboy opened Chief’s Creole Cafe in South St. Pete in the fall of 2013, in honor of Elihu’s late mother, Mary Brayboy. In addition to their pink building on 22nd St. S, the Brayboys own a variety of other parcels throughout St. Pete’s Deuces district. The Brayboys are of course known for their delicious southern dishes, but even more so for being active in St. Pete’s Black community over the decades.

Further detailed in St. Pete publication the Weekly Challenger, the Brayboys have worked towards restoring the historic Deuces neighborhood, which was once the “epicenter of the Black community during the days of segregation.”

According to a February article from St. Pete Catalyst, the Brayboys recently announced plans for a “uniquely affordable housing project” in the Deuces district.

After a decade, Safety Harbor’s beloved Pizzeria Gregario has closed

After years of teasing its closure, owner and one-man-show Greg Seymour decided to shutter his esteemed Safety Harbor pizzeria last month. Pizzeria Gregario—located at 400 2nd St. N—served its very last customers on Saturday, March 11.

Seymour opened Pizzeria Gregario in May 2013, and his dedication to high quality ingredients and from-scratch dough helped build a reputation for some of the best za’ in Tampa Bay. While the last iteration of his menu was a bit scaled down, favorites like the “Fungus Among Us”—loaded with toasty mushrooms and artisan cheese—still garnered busy weekends at the

Although Seymour closed his Safety Harbor storefront last month, he’ll strive to live the life of an “ethical snowbird,” like he told CL in 2022. “I really just want a space where I can practice my craft and continue learning,” Seymour explained. “I’m interested in learning how to farm and grow my own food—but I’m really just trying to find some sort of balance in my life.”

He plans to return to Tampa Bay before the winter, stating on Facebook that he’ll “be back

to practice my craft in November—location to be determined.”

Only time will tell if he’ll continue popping up at Tampa’s Sweetwater Organic Farm with his portable pizza oven. The 52 year-old finally took a step away from the restaurant industry that’s taken over his life for the past 40 or so years—although we can expect him to return to Tampa Bay’s foodie scene one of these days. And when he does, you’ll probably hear about it on Pizzeria Gregario’s Facebook page.

Elmer’s Sports Cafe, one of Tampa’s last smoking bars, is selling its Ybor City location

A few months after its South Tampa sister location had its last day of service, Elmer’s Sports Cafe in Ybor City is once again for sale. Real estate listings indicate the current owner is looking to unload the 7th Avenue location as well, for a cool $3.5 million.

Elmer’s has been a staple in Ybor City for over 25 years and is one of the few spots where you can still get a strong pour and a basket of wings while never putting out your cigarette. People from all walks of life have enjoyed coming here to watch the game, shoot pool and bullshit with regulars and bartenders alike. The sale includes the attached package store business and just over 4,100-square-feet of property that is located at 2003 E 7th Ave. in between The Dirty Shame and Columbia.

While the future of Elmer’s Sports Cafe remains uncertain, here’s hoping the new owners will keep the infamous “Bad Tippers” bulletin board so cheap patrons can get their payback.

Jourdan Ducat

The Wine House is now open out of Gulfport’s former Backfin Blue Cafe

A new spot perfect for sipping wine and snacking on decadent charcuterie boards just opened its doors in downtown Gulfport. Open at 2913 Beach Blvd. S out of the former Backfin Blue Cafe, The Wine House celebrated its soft opening on Tuesday, April 4.

The cottage-turned-restaurant which was once adorned in blue paint and nautical-themed art, is now a sleek pink and white wine bar with a welcoming patio space. In addition to a slew of natural and organic wines, The Wine House also dishes out charcuterie. After its soft opening phase, it will offer customers build-your-own charcuterie boards with a variety of housesmoked meats and artisan cheeses, alongside a few barbecue dishes.

After 25 years of dishing out its highlyregarded crab cakes, Backfin Blue Cafe closed its Gulfport restaurant last summer. “At the end of the day, a well-deserved offer was made on the building and property that couldn’t have been refused,” Carly Russell—daughter of Backfin

continued on page 42

CITYOFSTPETE/FLICKR

TURNING POINT: St. Pete’s Chief’s parcel is ready for a new tenant.

owner Harold Russell—told CL last year.

The well-deserved offer was made by The Wine House’s owners Gaston Gonzalez and Chi Sharrak, who purchased its neighbor, the historic Peninsula Inn, for almost $3 million last summer.

St. Pete Rising says that Gonzales and Sharrak plan to create a strong connection between the new Peninsula Inn and their newly-opened wine bar via a shared pathway and “a communal patio with outdoor games.”

The Tampa Bay Times says that The Wine House also teamed up with Matt Acree, who owns and operates Gulfport Brewery + Eatery right down the road.

For the latest information on this new Gulfport hotspot, head to its Facebook or Instagram at @thewinehouse_gulfport.

The Wine House is now open in quaint Gulfport from noon-8 p.m. Tuesday through Sunday.

Calida, an intimate restaurant and wine bar, is now open in St. Pete Lovers of fine wine and globally-inspired cuisine now have a hub in St. Pete’s Crescent Heights neighborhood. Located at 2909 Dr. MLK Jr. St. N, “chef-driven wine bar” Calida is now open for dinner Thursday-Saturday.

Although Calida is a ways away from the bustle of downtown St. Pete, its eclectic menu and curated wine selection certainly make it a destination for foodies across The ‘Burg. One of its more popular dishes is chow noodles, loaded with ginger, garlic, fresh vegetables, tamari, sesame and lime. Calida also offers a rotating charcuterie board, empanadas, baked polenta and decadent weekend specials—like its spiced ahi tuna with sesame ponzu, radish, and garlic chips.

St. Pete restaurants like Il Ritorno and Z Grille. Bennett named her concept Calida, since it’s the combination of the words “California” and “Florida.”

Executive Chef Ian Florence helms Calida’s seasonally-influenced kitchen, and patrons can expect a steady stream of weekend specials and new additions to his menu. To accompany its intimate menu, Bennett also offers exclusive wines that are hard to find elsewhere in Tampa Bay.

OPENINGS & CLOSINGS

For the latest updates on Calida, follow its Instagram at @calidastpete or head to calidastpete.com. The intimate, 25-seat eatery is now open in St. Pete’s Crescent Heights neighborhood from 5:30 p.m.-9:30 p.m. each Thursday-Saturday.

The bakery is located within restaurateur Jeff Gigante’s Boulon Brasserie at 1001 Water St. and is open Tuesday-Sunday 7 a.m.-3 p.m.

Inspired by traditional French cuisine, Boulon Bakery offers a variety of pastries, breads and sandwiches, including blueberry corn muffins and Impossible sausage and egg sandos. There’s also coffee and tea from Drink Katy’s.

During a site visit last January, Gigante beamed with pride over the bakery, pointing to the small, sun-lit room, saying, “we’re gonna have all the beautiful sweet little sandwiches , coffee and espresso, all of that, right here.”

Directing the kitchen is Summer Bailey—former leader of the pastry program at Bern’s—who will also oversee the pastry program at Union American Kitchen, which opens today.

According to the Tampa Bay Times, Calida is owned by Dayna Bennett, a California native with a resume stacked with experience at highly-regarded

Boulon Brasserie’s bakery is now open at Water Street in downtown Tampa

Boulon Bakery, a bready companion inside Boulon Brasserie, is now open in the Water Street District.

Boulon Brasserie opened earlier this year from Next Level Brands, a Tampa-based restaurant group that is also behind Forbici and Union New American, and is led by chef Habteab “Hab” Hamde, who previously was the executive chef at Bern’s Steakhouse.—Tyana

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BEAM ME IN: Next Level Brands founder Jeff Gigante recently beamed with pride over Boulon Brasserie’s bakery. ROCKAWAY PR continued

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REVIEWS PROFILES MUSIC WEEK

Fortunate human

Nels Cline ponders death, feeling alive in songs, ahead of Wilco’s Clearwater recital.

By Ray Roa

Wilco, a band in which Nels Cline has played guitar for the last 19 years, is in Clearwater next Thursday. The gig marks the Chicago rock outfit’s first Bay area show since 2013 when it played Tampa alongside Bob Dylan, My Morning Jacket and Bob Weir. The recital also comes 328 days after the release of Cruel County, a Wilco double album where bonafide American poet Jeff Tweedy recorded live alongside his bandmates for the first time in more than a decade.

When Tweedy—who was last in town for a 2019 solo show at Tampa Theatre—brought the songs to Wilco, Cline heard stunningly classic country and folk songs with strong choruses and traditional song structures. Once fans finally got to wrap their ears around the tunes, many mistook the guitar sounds for Cline’s when they, in fact, belong to the Fender B-Bender of Pat Sansone, who, like Cline, joined the band in 2004.

Cline—who’s responsible for iconic Wilco guitar solo on songs like “Ashes Of American Flags” and “Art Of Almost”—told Creative Loafing

Tampa Bay that Tweedy smiled ear to ear when he heard Sansone play the out-of-production guitar invented by Byrds alums Clarence White and multi-instrumentalist Gene Parsons.

“And I was digging it,” Cline added. “Now that we’ve been playing the songs out, playing them live, now Pat’s crushing even more.” Listening, and being awash in sound is Cline’s happy place, too, and it always has been since he and his percussionist twin brother Alex were obsessed with The Rolling Stones and The Byrds, respectively. After a pandemic that saw Wilco cancel or reschedule at least 40 shows, even soundchecks provide a specific joy.

INTERVIEW

Wlco w/The A’s Next Thursday, April 20. 7:30 p.m. $53.25 & up Ruth Eckerd Hall, 1111 McMullen Booth Rd., Clearwater. wilcoworld.net

“I like them, because we get to play more,” Cline told CL. “When sound starts, there’s that sort of feeling of connectedness, or chemistry, or whatever you want to call it. Everyone’s just kind of creating something together. I live for that.”

And it’s been quite a life for the 67-yearold Los Angeles native who started playing guitar on a secondhand, half-scale Melody his English teacher dad bought off one of his students when Cline was not yet a teenager. Besides the Byrds, Cline’s early musical diet included ”Help!”-era Beatles, plus the droning sounds of Ravi Shankar, who was introduced to him by his grade school teacher. Jimi Hendrix Experience’s “Manic Depression” was an inception point, and by the late-’70s, Cline earned his first recording credit as a sideman in a band fronted by jazz musician Vinny Golia. To date, Cline’s credit appears in works by almost 200 artists and on more than 200 albums. Besides Wilco and his eponymous groups, Cline has worked with names like Yoko Ono, Thurston Moore of Sonic Youth, Minutemen’s Mike Watt, Medeski, Martin & Wood, Phil Lesh and many more. He won’t entertain the notion,

but countless guitar players across the globe want to be Nels Cline.

“I’ll say this. I’m a very fortunate human,” he surrendered. “It’s OK to want to have a fortunate, nice, decent way of life. And I have that. You know, it’s pretty cool. I get to play and travel and do all the stuff that people do.”

That’s not to say that death hasn’t been on Cline’s mind over the last year.

His face-to-face with mortality started last January, six days after his own birthday, with the death of Yardbirds innovator Jeff Beck. Like everyone else, Clines believed the U.K. guitar god who successfully traversed genres like psych-rock, folk, metal and jazz would live forever. Beck’s larger-than-life stature also came with an air of humility that largely shrugged off the rock and roll stardom some of his peers embraced. “The language that he developed on a guitar had become so personal, and so, at times, utterly profound, and always entertaining and expressive as fuck,” Cline said.

continued on page 49

“Everyone’s just kind of creating something together. I live for that.”

TONIGHT’S THE DAY: Nels Cline (L) and Wilco return to Tampa Bay after a decade away.

PETER CROSBY

continued from page 47

Eight days later, David Crosby shook off his mortal coil, sending Cline running towards Déjà Vu’s title track (“from the album… not some sort of live version”) and “Guinnevere” from the Crosby, Stills & Nash album. Revisiting those records along with The Byrds’ “Everybody’s Been Burned” made Cline realize that he first experienced a huge part of the so-called jazz harmonic language that he is drawn to when he was just 10 or 11 years old.

“It’s so gorgeous to my ears. And then his voice is incredible,” Clines said, noting the episodic nature of “Déjà Vu,” which opens with brisk vocal harmonics before unfolding into a Crazy Horse-style tempo. “It’s just so great. And I really respond to that.”

cold tap of death’s finger on the backline edges is not infrequent. So, I’m just going to try to stay positive, and stay alive.”

And that’s seemingly just as easily done as it is said for Cline and his bandmates. For Cruel Country, Tweedy ran hot, reportedly writing roughly 50 songs in 52 days. As recording for the album neared completion, the band was already at work on an album loosely described as art-pop.

INTERVIEW

“That’s what Jeff called it, I think. Artpop. It’s still going,” Cline said. “It’s going well, I think. It’s a completely other vibe. I can’t wait to hear it finished.”

He’s still responding to the death of Television’s Tom Verlaine, who died 10 days after Croz.

Cline said that he can probably sing along to every solo written by Verlaine, all the way through his 1987 solo album, Flash Light. When Cline talks about the sounds in those compositions, he refers to them as language and as alive. Speaking to CL in February, Cline confessed that Verlaine’s music was still parading in his head.

“Verlaine was the crushing blow,” Cline said. As he tries to process the loss of a hero, Cline goes back and forth between heavy emotional reactions and the thought that death is just an inevitability. Generations of humanity—people in their 90s, 80s, and 70s—croak because they’re old. But Cline pointed out that some of them are in their 60s, too.

“My age. So it’s sobering,” he added. “I can tell you that as the senior in the band Wilco, the

The pivots play right into Cline’s hand. Before Wilco, he played rock and roll along with the other improvised music that piqued his interests. When he joined Tweedy’s band, Cline said that the 14-year-old guitar player inside of him was re-awakened. Next year marks his 20th anniversary with Wilco, and in some ways, not a lot has changed.

“I guess that 14-yearold is 33 you say now, but he just still loves to rock,” Cline told CL. It’s a mode he can’t shake, despite getting to the venue some days and thinking, “Why don’t I just take a completely weird approach one night?”

“But I’m just rocking out,” he said. “Because that’s how the architecture of the show kind of is. Jeff likes to have an innocent rock out where it’s just completely communal at the end of the night—and I’m down. Rock and roll, the chiming guitars, it’s a very good feeling for me.”

It’s the sensation of being alive. And considering all Cline and the country have been through over the last few years, that’s not a cruel feeling at all.

MANY WORDS: An hour goes by fast with Nels Cline.

SEAN ONO LENNON

“The cold tap of death’s finger on the backline edges is not infrequent.”

Any string goes

Clearwater’s popular ukulele festival returns this weekend.

By Kate Oberdorfer

On Tampa Bay Ukulele Day in downtown Dunedin late last month, Rob Wilde assured his tent’s many, many visitors that they could pick up their Ukulele Fest’s bright aqua t-shirts at the second annual Ukulele Festival concert in downtown Clearwater on April 15. “But are you sure?” they all asked him, pressing him about fits and sizes.

“Yes, I’m sure. We’ll see you at the festival” he responded. Wilde is the Events Director for TBUS, the Tampa Bay Ukulele Society, which just so happens to be the largest Ukulele Society in the world. TBUS boasts 2,900 active members and is empowered by its mission to educate, entertain and serve the public.

But, why the ukulele and why Tampa Bay? Well, for starters, the ukulele is an easy instrument to pick up because it isn’t as physically intimidating as other instruments and, if you’re musically inclined, the ukulele—a Portuguese instrument that found popularity in Hawaii—tends to come pretty naturally.

As far as Tampa Bay is concerned, bassist Steve Boisen of the popular father-daughter duo The Barnkickers—which has performed all over the Bay at places like The Ale and the Witch, Ohana and Safety Harbor’s Whistle Stop and Grill Bar—founded TBUS in Tarpon Springs. Boissen offered lessons in the libraries and then, what began as a small group of players at the Holiday Inn became a few hundred with the help of the Internet.

Coincidentally—but unaffiliated with TBUS’s Ukulele in the District Festival—world famous uke player Jake Shimabukuro is booked to play downtown Clearwater’s Bilheimer Capitol Theatre on Friday, too. Shimabukuro was named “the most famous and influential contemporary uke player” by Ukulele Magazine in 2022.

On Saturday night, the Barnkickers will take the stage at Peace Memorial Church alongside Jim Beloff. Beloff was also featured as one of the Top 10 uke players by Ukulele Magazine and is credited with the third wave of ukulele popularity due to his song books that allowed the average person to pick up a ukulele and play. The Barnkickers and Boisen concert will benefit the Homeless Empowerment Program as well as the Clearwater Free Clinic, emphasizing TBUS’s mission to serve the public.

SHOW PREVIEW

Ukulele Fest in the District

Friday-Saturday, April 14-15 Various venues in downtown Clearwater tampabayukulele.com

But perhaps the most popular feature of TBUS’s Ukulele Festival in the District is the workshops. The free beginner lessons will be held on Saturday from 12:30 p.m.2:30 p.m. at the Clearwater Building Reception Center. Ukuleles and a complimentary three chord songbook are provided and because of this course’s popularity last year, interested players are encouraged to book in advance.

Today, the most active ukulele groups are in Dunedin, but uke meetups pop up all over and are a critical part of a Tampa Bay uke player’s social life. And one of the biggest social events of the year is right around the corner on April 14-15, when TBUS hosts its second annual Ukulele Festival in the downtown district of Clearwater. Last year, the festival drew around 3,000 people; Wilde said that’s the highest turnout for a ukulele festival in the country.

The festival kicks off on Friday night.

Beloff will teach the “Songwriting for Songwriters Workshop” on Friday evening and the advanced beginner-intermediate workshop on Saturday afternoon. The songwriting session will run from 7 p.m.-8:30 p.m. and will include lessons on structure, rhyme, title placement and technique. Beloff will also offer song critique for the songwriters in attendance. The advanced beginner-intermediate session will introduce more chords, techniques and performance skills in popular music.

At 3 p.m., Kirk Jones will instruct students to play Van Morrison’s “Moondance” using just one finger in a workshop called, “The Easiest Barre Chord Song in the World”. Jones will also introduce students to the neck of the ukulele and teach them to play Barre chords, which are made by pressing down on more than one string and tend to be difficult.

Throughout the festival, the 400,500 and 600 blocks of Cleveland Street will be alive with the sound of ukes, vendors and local restaurants. The Downtown District Board and the City of Clearwater help to fund festivals such as the District’s Ukulele in order to bring more life and money into downtown Clearwater. Kala Brand Ukuleles; Replay Guitar; Three Chord Bourbon; The Missing Piece; Stroll Harbor Bluffs and the ever popular maker of the festival’s signature aqua t-shirts Casatera Tequila Seltzer are also sponsors of the festival.

So if your fingers are free next weekend, head on down to the festival. If you learn three chords you’ll be able to play 1,000 songs and even if you don’t strike a chord, you’ll get your bright aqua ukulele festival meets tequila seltzer t-shirt which seems to be as popular in Tampa Bay as the ukulele itself.

I LOVE UKE: Ukulele scene giant Jim Beloff will also be in town this weekend.

AGGIE80, CC BY-SA 4.0

Ready for it

Taylor Swift is set to do something U2, Bowie and others could not.

By Ray Roa

There’s a long list of rock and roll legends that have played stadium shows in Tampa Bay, and they’ve all mostly drawn big crowds. But what’s about to go down at Raymond James Stadium this weekend is beyond the wildest dreams of any Tampa music historian—and even haters who see Taylor Swift as some kind of pop music vigilante will need to calm down when they see the proof.

In 1973, Allman Brothers (touring with Chicago) drew about 30,000 people to Tampa Stadium according to old newspaper clippings. Bowie pulled in an estimated 32,000 for his 1987 “Glass Spider” tour in the same venue. U2—touring behind Joshua Tree, arguably one of the Top 10 pop albums of all time—didn’t crack the 60,000 mark when it played Tampa Stadium on Dec. 5, 1987.

1989 tour in 2015 drew 55,358 fans while the 2019 Reputation show drew 52,920.)

Eric Snider, a current contributor and former music critic for Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, covered many of the aforementioned rock shows during his nearly six years with the St. Petersburg Times. “I don’t recall any two-nighters, let alone a three-nighter,” Snider said.

SHOW PREVIEW

Taylor Swift w/bebadoobee

Gayle opens Thursday; Gracie Abrams

Friday-Saturday. Thursday-Saturday, April 13-15.

Sold-out. Raymond James Stadium, 4201 N Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa

Zeppelin, for its part, packed that old Sombrero in 1977, attracting close to 70,000 fans for a rescheduled concert that caused a disturbance after the show that got rained out after the second-song. Metallica was part of the 1988 Monsters of Rock Tour that drew about 35,000 to Tampa Stadium. Paul McCartney sold all 60,000 tickets to his 1990 show at Raymond James Stadium—which opened in 1998 when the old Tampa Stadium closed—in just one day.

But Swift—who plays three, back-to-back-toback, sold-out shows on Thursday, Friday and Saturday—could potentially play for 150,000200,000 fans this weekend at Raymond James which seats 65,000 for games and is expandable to 75,000. (A rep for the Tampa Sports Authority has yet to respond to requests for attendance estimates for Swift’s RayJay shows, but Swift’s

Janet Scherberger, who was the Music Critic for the Tampa Tribune, also can’t remember any artist playing multiple nights at Tampa Stadium. “It’s a testimony to the strength of her fan base, and she keeps gaining new fans,” Scherberger told CL. Scherberger added that her own daughter, who’s in her 30s now, first saw Swift when she opened for Brad Paisley at the Ford Amphitheatre back in 2007. “They want to go. They’re taking boyfriends, they’re taking their husbands, and they are loyal fans—they grew up with her,” Scherberberger added.

And there’s something else U2, Metallica, Allman Brothers, Bowie, Led Zeppelin and McCartney won’t be able to do, and that’s match the revenue Swift is bringing in on this haul. Tickets to Zeppelin’s show at Tampa Stadium cost $10-$12 according to the Tribune—and yes, the internet has made it easier than ever to line up for tickets (and jack up prices on them)—but Billboard says the average cost of a ticket to Swift’s Eras tour is $215, with presales for the entire tour estimated at near $600 million.

It’s going to be a history-making affair this weekend, and you can bet that Swift’s fans are ready for it.

GOLD RUSH: Presales for Swift’s Eras tour run are estimated at around $600 million.

BETH GARRABRANT

By Josh Bradley & Ray Roa C CL Recommends

This week's live music listing could not be contained on two pages. Visit cltampa.com/ music for the expanded version.

THU 13

Tim Barry w/Rancho La Chua Avail frontman Tim Barry is still part of the punk-rock outfit, but stays exclusive to whatever bill he performs on. Essentially, solo gigs see the Virginia boy maintain his folk state of mind, and completely ignore Avail material. He does have some new music to push, though. For all we know, Spring Hill, which released last year, may have taken lyrical inspiration from his time hanging out with his old bandmates again. Just a thought. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

Umphrey’s McGee

This year, progressivejam band Umphrey’s McGee celebrates 25 years of existence, and while we didn’t get one of its live “Hall of Fame” albums last year—a series of compilations featuring the most popular live performances among fans—its latest studio album Asking For a Friend is loaded with exemplary guitar and keyboard work and sounds like something airy enough for Trey Anastasio to consider rocking Madison Square Garden with on New Year’s Eve. Hopefully, the band’s first local, post-COVID stop will be memorable enough that enough fans will nominate our neck of the woods for Hall of Fame Class of 2023 next year. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

FRI 14

Animal Prince w/Dionysus/Anemoia

Tampa’s new school of young jazz and pop tastemakers is always busy, and two of its brightest lights—harpist-multiinstrumentalist Seth Adam Lynn and drummer Natalie Depergola (aka Katara)—join Animal Prince, a west coast synth-loving electro-acoustic duo, for a run of Florida shows. Animal Prince’s aesthetic would please fans of Matt & Kim’s energy and the experimental spirit of TuneYards. The ensemble is joined by sax-driven Gainesville fusion outfit Dionysus and Miami rock-trio Anemoia. (Shuffle, Tampa)

Fulcrum w/Vacancy/Dead Mirrors/ Ramtha After staging a sold-out rager in the room last Friday, promoter Locust Parade is back at Tampa biker bar Born Free for another heavy-hitter hardcore show. This time it's with Gainesville crusty grindcore hybrid Fulcrum, which breaks the mold on “Resuscitation”, a brutal, tempo-shifting two-and-a-half-minute highlight from its new album Heaven Is Violence . Botch, Coalesce and Converge-loving Tampa band Dead Mirrors opens the show along with new St. Pete thrash band Ramtha, and noise-rock outfit Vacancy featuring Locust Parade’s Eliot Mayo on vocals. (Born Free Pub & Grill, Tampa)

Jake Shimabukuro The Hawaii-born ukulele virtuoso’s latest album Jake & Friends , which dropped in 2021, is not a collection of recordings with people Jake has regularly worked and toured with over the course of his life. Instead, he brings heroes from all generations and genres together. I mean, did you ever think you’d hear Bette Midler, Billy Strings (playing Tampa this week!), Michael McDonald, and Willie Nelson on the same record? Shimabukuro’s show is not affliated with the Ukelele Fest in The District happening downtown, but you can read more about Clearwater’s very uke-centric weekend on p. 51. (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater)

Montell Jordan If you remember the hit song “This is How We Do It,” then you know that if you’re going to attempt to “do it,” it must be on a Friday night, and only when you’re feeling “alright,” and most importantly it needs to specifically happen on the “westside.” Well, it’s all going to go as planned when ‘90s R&B singer Montell Jordan kicks off the Clearwater Threshers’ summer concert series. The show is included with regular admission after the game against the Fort Myers Mighty Mussels. Gates open at 5:30 p.m. for a 6:30 pm start time. Tickets start at $7. Surely Jordan will play all the hits, just be sure that the designated driver takes the keys to your truck. (BayCare Ballpark, Clearwater)—Colin Wolf

Tiny.Blips New venue, the Moontower right next to Dunedin Brewery, has legs and hosts a psychedelic-soul show headlined by Heavy Pets drummer Jamie Newitt who showcases his new solo project, Tiny.Blips at this no-cover gig for fans of future funk, new school disco and live looping. (The Moontower, Dunedin)

Tampa Bay Blues Festival w/Robert Cray/Tab Benoit/Ana Popovic/The Fabulous Thunderbirds/Tower of Power/ more Tommy Castro & the Painkillers kick things off with a party at the Palladium on Thursday night, but the 27th Tampa Bay Blues festival really gets going on Friday with the one-two punch of headliner Robert Cray and supporting act Ana Popovic. Tower of Power and Tab Benoit anchor Saturday's lineup before Sunday welcomes The Fabulous Thunderbirds to close it out. All told more than a dozen artists will take the stage at what's easily one of Tampa Bay's most laidback and well-poiled music festivals. (Vinoy Park, St. Petersburg)

SAT 15

David Dondero “That was once a Cuban district and a center for the arts, was now a mall like atmosphere, homogeneous and insincere,” Dondero sings, about Ybor City, on the title track of his 2005 LP South of the South . “They burned its heart right out. Down south of the south.” Dondero and a forthcoming new art compound of folkloric proportions come together when the 53-year-old plays Crab Devil in Ybor Heights—just two miles from that mall-like entity he sang about nearly two decades ago. The show is the kickoff for Crab Devil’s live music series and will see parts of the Peninsularium immersive art experience open to attendees. If you’re into weird, mythological Florida, then you’re gonna wanna see it. Definitely crab a beer at Tim Ogden's new Deviant Libation brewery next door, too. (Crab Devil, Tampa)

Iris DeMent

DASHA BROWN

continued from page 55

Have Gun, Will Travel w/Nick Dittmeier & the Sawdusters/Claire Vandiver We’ve seen stranger things than an Americana band from Indiana, but there’s something extra funky about the way Nick Dittmeier—who’ll steal any free pen he can—does it with his band, the Sawdusters. Its 2022 album Heavy Denim is peppered with soulful harmony (“Save Me From Myself”), sing-along-ready anthems (“Free As We’d Ever Been”) and almost-bluesy Nawlins flavored romps (“Things are Getting Strange”). (Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa)

L8 Night Flights If you’ve been to the St. Pete pier as dusk turns dark lately, you might have noticed a pop-up rave of sorts. The party is organized by DJ and promoter collective L8 Night Flights, which has long booked special events across the Bay area. To help raise money to cover costs for the event, the L8 Night crew is hosting an online fundraiser and in-person party from 4 p.m.11 p.m. (organizers say the first pier pop-up cost $1,700, and they hope to collect $5,000 to help with future events). “We are super excited to see where this little experiment in crowdfunded, free-to-attend, community-supported events in public spaces will take us,” organizers wrote. “We have some intriguing ideas for the future, and we believe that with your support, we can truly have a positive impact bringing joy and dance to our entire community.” (St. Pete Pier, St. Petersburg)

The Red Clay Strays The country-rock outfit from Alabama will make you realize that maybe not all modern country music is shit. Its sound is generally pretty bass-heavy and low-key. Take the band’s Moment of Truth album, for instance. Basically, imagine Johnny Cash’s With His Hot and Blue Guitar, just mostly leaning on an acoustic bass, minus a few electric numbers. If you’re expecting to get down to music about the heartbreak of your tractor breaking down while you’re slurping a Bud Light (oh, sorry: Jack Daniels), you’re gonna be disappointed. (The Attic at Rock Brothers Brewing, Ybor City)

SUN 16

Iris DeMent Sometime in 1997, our friends at WMNF Tampa 88.5-FM decided to play Iris DeMent’s “Wasteland of the Free” (which should have been a warning of what was to come in the 21st century). In response, former Florida Senator John Grant—an avid anti-LGBTQ+ advocate who now has a massive Ron DeSantis fetish—decided to cut $104,000 from the station’s annual state funding. An emergency fundraiser staged by WMNF raised $120,000 within a day and a half, but this early brush with Floridian fascism is all the reason for the 62-year-old folk singer to remain active. Her new album Workin’ on a World has a title track in which she expresses how her only takeaway from living in such a rotten world is that she’s working to make it better for future generations, as her ancestors did for her. DeMent is definitely on the right side of history, and her buddy John Prine—who she toured with in the aughts—will surely be there in spirit when she performs at the Central Park Performing Arts Center on Sunday. (Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo)

Laura Jane Grace w/Weakened Friends/ There are fewer purer, fan-artist connections than the one Grace has with her followers, who’ll pack 687 Central Ave. where Grace’s band Against Me! played some of its most memorable shows when the room was known as State Theatre (Grace describes many of the gigs in her 2016 memoir “Tranny: Confessions Of Punk Rock’s Most Infamous Anarchist Sellout”). Before the show, Grace will be at Bananas Records retail location on 22nd Avenue to sign anything you got, take photos and celebrate with the community from 1 p.m.-3 p.m. (Floridian Social, St. Petersburg)

The Lone Bellow Trio w/Stephen Wilson Jr. Only a group of brilliant singersongwriters could so exquisitely come up with an album like Love Songs for Losers , which the Lone Bellow dropped last year. The collection—recorded at the home of Roy Orbison, unarguably the king of what the album title conveys—is loaded with mini Americana rock operas, sentimental lyrics, and a few numbers that the Brooklynbased band feels ready to rock arenas with.

(Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater)

Punk Flea Pop-Up: Arcane Arcade w/ Except You/Black Valley Moon/Twisty Chris & the Puddin’ Packs/DJ Dadd Lakeland’s punk rock flea market is a traveling affair, and this weekend it’s back in St. Petersburg where dozens of vendors will set up outside The Brutalist brewery alongside food trucks and bands that play pop-punk, rock, party-ready doo-wop surf-rock, and even western-flavored instrumental-noir.

(The Brutalist, St. Petersburg)

Queensryche w/Trauma/Marty Friedman

Ever since COVID-19 hit, Tampa Bay (well, Clearwater specifically) has gotten three different tastes of ex-Queensryche frontman Geoff Tate performing the jams that put him on the map. As for the current iteration of his old band, Todd La Torre—a St. Pete native— took Tate’s place 11 years ago, and recently appeared on Digital Noise Alliance , his fourth album with Queensryche. These days, the metal pioneers’ setlist is fairly short, but nonetheless agreeable between OG fans and ride-or-dies. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

MON 17

Hovvdy w/Whitmer Thomas/girlpuppy

After canceling a Jannus Live gig last fall, the Austin-based indie pop duo—fresh off a 2022 EP, billboard for my feelings —is moving to the other side of Tampa Bay, and indoors no less. The EP contains instrumental versions of every track included, just in case you think you and your homies can match the brotherly harmonies of Charlie Martin and Will Taylor.

“Stone Quackers” voice actor Whitmer Thomas and Georgia indie rocker girlpuppy open. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

Styx w/Don Felder Is it even springtime in Tampa Bay if Styx doesn’t roll into town?

Guitarist and co-founder James “J.Y.” Young recently lost his wife of 50 years, so he’s a guy who definitely needs a distraction. You’re lying if you think that a “Come Sail Away” singalong—with or without Dennis DeYoung—won’t make all the adversity go away for six minutes. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)

TUE 18

Billy Strings Strings has been on a rapid rise since he played Safety Harbor Songfest in 2017, and that journey comes back to Tampa Bay next spring. The show is in support of the Michigan-born, Nashville-based picker’s 2021 inward-looking album, Renewal , plus the release of this year’s Me/And/Dad

The latter is a covers record where Strings and his father Terry Barber play new renditions of 14 bluegrass and country songs that they’ve been playing together since Strings was a child. (Yuengling Center, Tampa)

WED 19

The Happy Fits w/The Hails The guys in the New Jersey-based indie rock trio now know for sure that they’ve made it, because fairly recently, they were officially granted a Wikipedia page. To celebrate that—and the release of last summer’s Under the Shade of Green —The Happy Fits make their Tampa Bay debut at Crowbar next week, with support from fellow indie rock outfit The Hails, which has yet to score a spot on the Internet’s most editable encyclopedia. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

THU 20

Drive-By Truckers w/Lydia Loveless

The Truckers’ Patterson Hood played two solo shows in Ybor City last year, but this stop find his Athens, Georgia rock and roll band on tour in support of a new album, Welcome 2 Club VIII , which plays like a tip of the cap to the band’s honky-tonkin, Muscle Shoals origin. Lydia Loveless—a heartbreaking, almost unrivaled Americana songwriter and Bloodshot Records signee—opens the show. (Floridian Social Club, St. Petersburg)

Of Good Nature w/Wheeland Brothers

One of Of Good Nature’s first major gigs was opening the 2017 iteration of Reggae Rise Up on the Vibe Stage. Six years down the

line, the funky alt-rock outfit is hanging onto the occasional horns, but continues a segue into a more mainstream sound that could potentially land it in a position to rock 97X Next Big Thing this winter. In the meantime, Skipper’s Smokehouse is where the boys from Charlotte will spend 4/20, with support from the Wheeland Brothers. (Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa)

Prof w/Juice Lord/Bayo/Willie Wonka

Horse , the new album from Jacob Anderson—aka Prof—has a star-studded lineup featuring Kevin Gates, Method Man, and Mac Irv. Not that we expect any major, unannounced guests to show up at the emcee’s Tampa Bay debut on Thursday— nine days before his 39th birthday—but Juice Lord, Bayo, and Willie Wonka play support for what promises to be a late ass work night. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

Tommy Prine Nearly three years after the death of his father John, Tommy Prine has plans to release his debut album this summer. Before that, however, comes a St. Petersburg gig just six-and-a-half miles from the Gulfport home that John kept with his wife (and Tommy’s mom) Fiona. Produced by Ruston Kelly and Gena Johnson, This Far South , due on June 23, is a hat tip to a feeling Tommy (who played the old Hideaway Cafe in 2021) had when he was without purpose, partying and just existing. “I found myself at a fork in the road and chose the better path, and in that moment, I swore I would never be ‘this far south’ again,” he said in a statement. (Hough Hall at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg)

Wilco w/The A’s The Chicago indierock band’s Bay area show arrives nearly a year after the release of its latest album, Cruel Country, where Wilco sprawls out on a 21-track, 80-minute meditation on the United States' recent tumultuous last few years. Read part of our Q&A with Wilco guitarist Nels Cline on p. 47, and see the full chat via cltampa.com/music. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)

Hovvdy

MURIEL MARGARET

APRIL

APRIL

MAY

MAY

FAST FASHION

SATURDAY APRIL 15

MUSIC HALL ENDOXA BOOKING PRESENTS

ALLMAN BROS TRIBUTE

STEELIN PEACHES

DOORS 8 | SHOW 9 $10 ADV | $15 DOS | 18+

SUNDAY APRIL 16

MUSIC HALL ENDOXA BOOKING PRESENTS

FRANKIE ROSE

+ ROMEO BLU / OFFERINGS

DOORS 8 | SHOW 9 $15 ADV | $20 DOS | 18+

MONDAY APRIL 17 CLOSED

TUESDAY APRIL 18

DJ GABE

& 10:30-12:30 | FREE

BIERGARTEN LAURIS

VIDAL

JEFF BRAWER GREG MILO SG WOOD 4:30-9:30 | FREE

BIERGARTEN

JAMIE THOMAS

6:30-8:30 | FREE

NO SHOW | RESTAURANT & BAR OPEN 11AM-11PM

WEDNESDAY APRIL 19

BIERGARTEN

BBQUSTIC! PAMELA JO BAND

FOLK / BLUEGRASS 6:30-8:30 | FREE

MAY

JUNE

JUNE

JUNE

MAY

Two months after headlining Orpheum—and just a week after playing Coachella—Soul Glo is headed back to Tampa Bay. The rising star of Philadelphia hardcore is among headliners for the fourday Lost In St. Pete music and arts festival happening April 27-30.

Other Lost In St. Pete headliners coming to the Sunshine City this month include feminist punk band War on Women (pictured), Virgina hardcore favorite Strike Anywhere, soul-powerviolence hybrid Zulu, Fat Mike’s new band Codefendants, plus Tampa rappers Famous Kid Brick and Big Baby Scumbag. All told, upwards of 200 bands are on the poster for the four-day festival happening in various venues including Floridian Social, Cage Brewing and the Lost HQ in the Warehouse District.

Cover charge for the various shows range from free to $25, and a full lineup is available via lostcreations.art. See Josh Bradley’s weekly roundup of new concert announcements below.—Ray Roa

Budapalooza: Chlorinefields w/ Witch Hiatus/Samsara/Razor & the Boogiemen/House of I/Sligh/Highway Advisory Radio/King Bee/The Don’t Belongs/more Thursday, April 20. 4:20 p.m. Prices TBA. Hooch and Hive, Tampa

The Forum w/Kind Villain/Nate Lundy Saturday, April 22. 7 p.m. $10. Hooch and Hive, Tampa

Mike Tony Saturday, April 22. 7 p.m. No cover. In Between Days, St. Petersburg

Tendencia w/Must Not Kill/March of the Fallen/The Horribles/123Terrible Sunday, April 23. 6 p.m. $12. Orpheum, Tampa

WizTheMc (supporting USPAHL) Saturday, April 29. 7 p.m. $17. Crowbar, Ybor City

MIRA’s Live Music Showcase Monday, May 1. 7 p.m. $5, no cover for SPC students, faculty, and staff. Hough Hall at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg

Tampa Bay Symphony Spring 2023: Tchaikovsky’s Pathetique Tuesday, May 2. 8 p.m. $20, no cover to students and children. Hough Hall at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg

Eem Triplin (supporting $not w/ Night Lovell/TBA/DC The Don/Micro)

Saturday, May 6. 7 p.m. Prices TBA. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Anders Osborne (acoustic) Thursday, May 11. 8 p.m. $60 & up. The Attic at Rock Brothers, Ybor City

Gypsy Soul Blues: Troy Youngblood & the Soulfish w/The Skull and Bone Band/George Pennington III Thursday, May 18. 9 p.m. $10. Crowbar, Ybor City

Leon Majcen w/Joel Luke Saturday, May 20. 7 p.m. $20. Tarpon Arts, Tarpon Springs

Light The Fire w/Ghost Chant/ Otherworld/Oceans End Thursday, May 25. 8 p.m. $13. Crowbar, Ybor City

Grand Lotus w/King Complex/Twin Suns/Witch Hiatus Friday, May 26. 9 p.m. $10. Crowbar, Ybor City

Parrotfish w/Visit Neptune/Gary Lazer Eyes Friday, June 2. 8 p.m. $12. Hooch and Hive, Tampa

Gareth Emery Saturday, June 3. 10 p.m. $25. The Ritz, Ybor City

Bones w/Xavier Wulf/Eddy Baker Tuesday, June 6. 6:30 p.m. $84 (resale only).

Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Donald Harrison Quartet Thursday, June 8. 7:30 p.m. $30 & up. Side Door at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg

Mercy McCoy w/Joshua Reilly Saturday, June 10. 7 p.m. $20. Tarpon Arts, Tarpon Springs

Melanie Martinez Tuesday, June 20. 7:30 p.m. $150 & up (resale only). Yuengling Center, Tampa

Palomino Blond w/Chorinefields/Mold!/

Novely Friday, June 30. 9 p.m. $12. Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa

Liam Bauman w/Taylor Raynor/Greg

Bauman Saturday, July 8. 7 p.m. $20.

Tarpon Arts, Tarpon Springs

Lynyrd Skynyrd w/ZZ Top/Uncle

Kracker Saturday, July 22. 6:30 p.m. $29.50 & up. Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa

Sister, wife

By Dan Savage

I married my high school girlfriend after college. We were happy, and the sex was fantastic. Then she fell in love with a woman and came out—just to me—as bisexual or possibly a lesbian. Our relationship somehow survived this tumult, and we decided to start a family. We are now in our 50s, our children are grown, and I have not had sex for approximately two decades. My wife long ago lost any desire for intimacy with me or anyone else. My sex drive is as strong as ever but limited to strictly solo activities. My wife remains mostly closeted in terms of not being out to her friends and family, with one exception: one of her sisters, who is single.

wife, who says she feels no sexual urges at all, but it is for me. I’ve been told by both my wife and my sister-in-law to forget this conversation ever happened, so we can all move on. But I find I can’t move on. So, what do I do?—Seeking Insight Somewhere

SAVAGE LOVE

My wife is overseas currently (for work), and we’ve been geographically separated for four years now.

That’s the background. I’m writing to you about the bizarre event that took place over the weekend: I was texting with my wife’s sister and out of the blue she writes that she has my wife’s permission to sleep with me. This was totally unexpected and caused a panic attack on my part. It felt wrong. I was at a loss as to what to say. She assured me, still via text, that this was OK with my wife, and it would be a safe “sisterin-law with benefits” arrangement. She also has physical needs that are unmet, as she is single, so we’d be helping each other. My wife and I had discussed having an “open” marriage, with each of us seeking “girlfriends.” My wife has said she is OK with this, but I am not, as I fear having a girlfriend—I fear either of us having a girlfriend—could throw our home and family life into chaos and potentially result in divorce, which wouldn’t be fair to the children. Believing my sister-in-law actually had my wife’s permission to at least raise the subject, I went a bit down the road with her via text (things got explicit) and I experienced something I haven’t for 20 years: the elation of an imminent sexual encounter.

Of course, I needed reassurance that my wife was actually OK with this, so I asked her. Well, it seems there was a major misunderstanding. My wife was appalled, utterly so. According to my wife, her sister “joked” about sleeping with me when the two of them were discussing the details of their relationships and their sexualities, and my wife only jokingly agreed. Now I feel guilty that I even considered having sex with my wife’s sister, to say nothing of the guilt I feel about the wedge this has driven into a close sisterly relationship. My wife doesn’t want to discuss this any further. I get that it is weird, especially if it were to be condoned by all parties. But I want to share more about how I feel with my wife. I don’t think she understands how depressing it is to feel that you’ll never be intimate with anyone ever again. That may not be a struggle for my

First, I’m not the Supreme Court. I can’t overrule your wife and order her to discuss something she refuses to discuss, SIS, much less order your wife to allow you—the husband she doesn’t wanna fuck— to go and fuck her sister, who, despite having raised the subject, to disastrous effect, also doesn’t want to discuss the matter further. If you need to talk about this at length with someone, SIS, confide in a friend and/or talk to a therapist.

Second, you haven’t had sex in 20 years, SIS, and it’s understandable that you entertained the first serious offer you’d gotten in decades. Your wife’s sister essentially offered a cheeseburger to a starving man. That you took a tiny little bite out of that cheeseburger before thinking to ask your vegan spouse if it was OK for you to have a cheeseburger… albeit a cheeseburger made with ground sister meat… isn’t something your wife should hold against you for the rest of your life, even if she’d rather not discuss it.

Third, you have your wife’s permission to fuck other women—even date other women—so long as you aren’t dating and/or fucking one of her relatives. So, instead of grieving the pussy you’re never gonna get again (your wife’s) or allowing yourself to obsess about the pussy you never should’ve been offered (your sister-in-law’s), SIS, I would encourage you to get some pussy that doesn’t share quite so much of its DNA with your wife. Prioritizing stability when your kids were young was completely commendable, SIS, but your kids are grown now. And if you’re so starved for sex that you find yourself jumping at highly inappropriate offers—and “sister-in-law with benefits” more than meets that threshold—you would be well-advised to seek sex with a more appropriate potential partner than to wait for the next inappropriate offer that comes along. Yes, sex can create chaos. Hell, sometimes I think sex is chaos. But controlled chaos > uncontrolled chaos.

Fourth and finally, SIS, your wife tells you she’s asexual and does not experience desire… and while that may be true… there’s a chance it’s not. While asexuality is both real and valid and vice-versa, people have been known to lie to their spouses about important things no one should lie about. And maybe I’m old and jaded, and maybe I should keep my mouth shut, but I could see someone who married her cis male high school sweetheart before realizing she was

maybe/probably/most likely a lesbian claiming to be asexual—not just to get her off the hook of having to fuck her husband, whom she may actually love, but to spare her husband’s feelings. It’s not that she doesn’t want to have sex with you, but that she doesn’t want to have sex with anyone. And that may be true. Your wife could be asexual. Or she could have a girlfriend on the side of the world that you don’t know about.

P.S. Maybe I’m jaded and maybe my sample is skewed (definitely my sample is skewed), but something about the conversation your wife had with her sister—the disastrous conversation that led to this whole mess—has my spidey senses tinkling. Seeing as your wife is asexual and decades into a loving but sexless marriage and she and her sister were close… she wouldn’t have much to say to her sister during a conversation about their relationships and their sexualities?

Besides “still asexual,” and, “still married,” of course, but I can’t imagine those two statements would elicit the joke your sister-in-law made and the misunderstanding it led to.

P.P.S. Now go get laid.

My hub and I enjoy your columns and it’s opened our minds about sex a lot. We recently gave each other the OK to try to fulfill our monogamish fantasies IRL but haven’t acted on them yet. But I did meet a guy online, who is also married, and we’ve been having the most incredible cybersex. It’s turned into regular chats, and we’ve talked about meeting up in person. Why am I feeling kind of guilty about this? The hub knows I’m fucking around online with this guy, and it even turns him on! I find myself thinking about this other guy all of the time. Should I end it? Or keep having fantastic orgasms without the hub?—Wife And Naughty

Tease

Seeing as you brought this question to me, WANT, and not a priest or an uptight monogamy fetishist posing as a couples’ counselor, I’m gonna go ahead and tell you what you wanted to hear: keep fucking around with this guy online and IRL, if you get a good feeling from him after you meet up in person. New relationship energy (NRE), which is what you’re feeling for this guy, can be intense, but it’s always temporary; so, go ahead and enjoy it as long as it lasts. As for the guilt, well, people who do and enjoy things they’ve been told—for no legitimate reason—they’re not supposed to do or enjoy, e.g., gay sex, extramarital sex, kinky sex, seeing a

sex worker, etc., they sometimes convince themselves that having the decency to feel bad about what they’ve done (at least during their refractory period) means they’re still good and moral people. I’m here from the future to tell you that you don’t have to feel bad about what you’re doing with your husband’s permission, WANT, and to his delight. Unless feeling bad about it turns you on, of course, in which case… you can enjoy that and enjoy feeling bad about that, too.

We splurge on a housecleaner a couple times a month while we’re at work. We always make sure to tidy up our personal items before she comes, but this week I accidentally left not one but TWO vibrators by the bathroom sink. I had forgotten to put them away after I washed them, and I was in a rush! Total accident! When I returned home to a clean house, the vibes were neatly laid on the bathroom counter. I am not a person with shame around sex, but this made me feel SO embarrassed! She should not have had to see/touch those! Should we apologize? If so, how to bring it up in a way that’s not awkward? Should we pay her extra for that session? I’m so embarrassed and don’t want her to feel demeaned.—Very Intense Blushing-Enhanced Situation

What does your housecleaner know now that she didn’t know before? Assuming she’s never spotted one of your sex toys before—an assumption I would classify as semi-reasonable (at best!)— he now knows, thanks to your shocking carelessness, that you have sex and that you, like millions of other adults (and surely one or two of her other clients), sometimes use sex toys. Even if she was shocked and mortified and disappointed in you, VIBES, I think you should follow your housekeeper’s lead: she didn’t make a big deal about it, and you shouldn’t make a big deal about it. Just like your hole, VIBES, the memory hole is there to be used.

P.S. Once after we very specifically asked that our room not be made up during a week-long stay at a hotel, we came back after breakfast—on the very first morning we were there—to find the two dozen sex toys and fifty pounds of bondage gear we’d left strewn all over the room neatly arranged on the shelves of our walk-in closet. If we could look the little old Slovenian lady who cleaned our room in the eye every day for the rest of that week, you can look your housecleaner in the eye, too.

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HELP WANTED

Woody’s Kitchens and More, one of Tampa Bay’s premier kitchen and home design companies, seeks a Residential Architectural Designer to join its St. Petersburg office. Candidates will hold at a minimum: a bachelor’s degree in architecture, three years’ experience in residential design, and be versed in Chief Architect and CAD software.

Please send resume or C.V. including all qualifications and salary requirements to tammy@woodyskitchens.com

IT’S PUNNERIFIC! by

ACROSS

1 Slangy blame

4 Actor Omar

8 Subtle bidding movement

2 Dame Peggy, the actress

3 Golfer Calvin or quarterback Rodney

4 Light tan

5 Please, to the Bard

6 Battery terminal: abbr.

7 UCLA or USC

8 Turn over a ___

9 Infamous cow’s owner

10 Red 5, e.g.

11 Garden of Earthly Delights painter

12 Brand of chips?

13 Place for ships

14 Steel-___ (Hefty trash bag)

15 City of Syria

16 Province of N Ireland

22 Particle or Romanian name

23 Veterans’ org.

24 PaperMate rival

29 Lemon or lime drink

30 Lemon-lime drink

32 Diving bell inventor

33 Mammal seen on Alaskan cruises

34 Salon offering

35 An unfinished figure 8?

36 Actress Cates

42 Polly, to Tom Sawyer

43 Athlete’s intro?

44 The most you can pay

Merl Reagle