December 2008

THE MAGAZINE OF THE CATHOLIC DIOCESE OF LANSING

IP +o the Gentiles- apostle to us all marriage

matters

He says: We're going to Paris. Let's plan! She says: Can't we just wing it?

What do they do? parenting

journey

Dealing with disaster how to help your child cope culture

Christmas recycled what to do with all those cards?

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ear Mom and Dad, Last month, I shared my thankfulness for the influence that three memorable priests have had on my life and the discernment that eventually led me to the priesthood. I would suppose that most people would expect this. What some may not suspect is how the two of you and your commitment to one another in living the sacrament of marriage also helped me along this same path. Just as I shared my thanks for the committed witness of Fathers Pat, Ed and Charlie, I wish to thank both of you for the witness you have offered during your 51 years of marriage. As you have lived your vocation, your witness has inspired me in my own. Thank you for teaching me that people are always more important than things. Through the years, I have watched the two of you live this lesson. Your commitment to one another has always demonstrated that it is not only possible but necessary to put the other’s needs before one’s own. I watched the two of you do this as you shared in the responsibilities of raising a family while managing the pressures of your own careers and the growing needs of your own aging parents. In all that you have done, you have demonstrated that the needs of people always come first. Thank you for showing me that being of service to those around us – especially those who are most vulnerable – is a vital and necessary part of everyday life. Whether it was in supplying the fixings or in giving the time and effort necessary to assemble sandwiches for the parish homeless shelter ministry or in your willingness to make the time to teach literacy skills to adults, you have always showed that being of service in simple, quiet ways is an important means to encounter Jesus. Thank you for teaching me that any job worth doing is worth doing well. You have always showed that using our God-given skills and talents also entails the willingness to go the extra distance to make sure that those talents are used to their Your desire and willingness to make best end. Often, this also means helping one another to see that faith a natural part of our life as a God has placed in us talents or family has also meant that skills that we cannot perceive on our own. Finally, thank you for the gift of your quiet, strong faith in God which has been an integral part of each of these important lessons. Your desire and willingness to make faith a natural part of our life as a family has also meant that faith is a reality that must be lived each and every day. You have sought to live these lessons in your vocation. I pray that I might do so in mine. And so our journey in FAITH continues.

Dear Mom and Dad,

Thank you for the gift of my vocation

– Father Dwight Ezop is editor of FAITH Magazine and pastor of the Catholic Community of St. Jude

FAITH Magazine

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December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

T. Gennara

faith is a reality that must be lived each and every day.

Liturgical Calendar: Francis Xavier, Priest Dec. 3 | John of Damascus, Priest and Doctor Dec. 4 | Nicholas, Bishop

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F A I T H l o o k s a t m a r r i a g e

what you’ll get out of this issue

in the know with Fr. Joe 6C an Catholics be orthodox? – Father Joseph Krupp

work life

9 Should I pass up that promotion? – Tim Ryan

J. Luning

Marriage – the vocation to which most of us are called. In this issue, FAITH looks at three different stages of marriage – from the moment of the proposal to the wedding, to what it’s like to be a young two-career couple with small children, and to the reflective stage that comes with a long, happy marriage.

inside

Matt is a rowing coach at Michigan State University. Lisa is a biology teacher. They have two young children and busy lives. Every day, they figure out ways to bring their faith into the varied arenas of events. Read “Successful careers and a successful marriage – how Matt and Lisa do both” to find out how they are making marriage work.

theology 101

10 Did God create evil? – Elizabeth Solsburg

For nearly half a century, Marge and Dan McPartlin have been making marriage work. When you meet them, you want to know what their secret is – how have they stayed best friends. “The ups and downs of a happy marriage” will tell you.

P. Shippert

marriage matters

T. Gennara

Brandon and Melissa were planning their wedding. But they were also planning for life in all the days after the wedding bells had stopped ringing. What did they learn about marriage, and each other? Find out in “How do we know we should get married?”

12 H e says: We’re going to Paris. Let’s plan! She says: Can’t we just wing it? What do they do? – Tom and Joann Fogle

parenting journey

13 D ealing with disaster – how to help your child cope. – Dr. Cathleen McGreal

culture

f r o m t h e b i s h o p The other vocation crisis. It’s not only the priesthood that’s facing a vocation crisis – so is marriage. Read Bishop Boyea’s reflections about how we can build up marriages.

s p e c i a l r e p o r t Pornography is an ugly reality in our world. Read FAITH’s special report, including a first-person account of how pornography nearly destroyed one young man’s marriage and life.

26 Christmas recycled – what to do with all those cards? – Michelle Sessions Difranco

last word

31 St. Paul – apostle to the Gentiles; apostle to us all. – Bishop Carl F. Mengeling

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The Magazine of the Catholic Diocese of Lansing

PUBLISHER

Rev. Dwight Ezop

EDITOR AND CHAIRMAN

December 2008 • Volume 9: Issue 10

Creating a safe environment

A Statement from the Office of the Bishop

FA I T H P u b l i s h i n g S e r v i c e Patrick M. O’Brien PRESIDENT/CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER

Elizabeth Martin Solsburg DIRECTOR OF CUSTOM PUBLISHING/ EDITORIAL DIRECTOR

Joanne Eason DIRECTOR OF CREATIVE SERVICE

Vicki Wells-Bedard

DIRECTOR OF SALES AND MARKETING

Patrick Dally ART DIRECTOR

Lynne Ridenour

GRAPHIC DESIGNER/WEBMASTER

Abby Wieber

GRAPHIC DESIGNER

Jillane Job EDITORIAL ASSISTANT

Patricia Oliver SECRETARY

Protecting our children and vulnerable adults is one of our diocese’s highest priorities. We are committed to creating safe environments everywhere within the church. As such, we have actively participated in criminal background checks and Protecting God’s Children training through VIRTUS. These sessions are required for all of our employees and for volunteers who work with children. Through this program, personnel and volunteers learn the signs of abuse

and what to do if they suspect it. Participation in safe environment training is one of the requirements for all Catholic dioceses as part of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People; it is also a moral and ethical requirement for all of us who care about our children and youth. During the recent audit to determine our compliance with the Charter, the auditors discovered that volunteers from several of

InnerWorkings

PRINT MANAGEMENT FAITHPublishingService.com

Andrew Peltcs

EDITORIAL INTERN

Kevin Duffy Dcn. Tom and JoAnne Fogle Katie Hicks Bob Horning Rev. Joseph Krupp Cathleen McGreal Tim Ryan Michelle Sessions DiFranco CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Derek Melot

PROOFREADING

Tom Gennara James Luning (cover) Philip Shippert

We want to hear from you!

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS

Wayne Case Michael Eichhorn Mary Jo Gillilland Diane Nowak Margaret Perrone Joseph Reid Rev. Bernard Reilly James Rhadigan Ricardo Rodriguez Dcn. David Rosenberg Rev. James Swiat Rev. Jerry Vincke Peter Wagner Sharon Wimple

Tell us what you think. We want to hear your opinions – about articles in the magazine, happenings in our church or anything you want to share. Send e-mail to: esolsburg@faithpublishingservice.com

ADVISORY BOARD

FAITHTM (USPS 019993) is a publication of FAITH Publishing Service, Catholic Diocese of Lansing, 300 W. Ottawa, Lansing, MI 48933. FAITHTM is a membership publication of the Catholic Diocese of Lansing and is published monthly except for February and August. To purchase a subscription, log onto FAITHmag.com. If you have a change of address, please contact your parish. Periodicals postage paid at Lansing, MI or additional offices. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to FAITHTM, 209 Seymour Ave., Lansing, MI 48933 ©FAITH Publishing Service. FAITH is a trademark of FAITH Publishing Service.

Most Rev. Carl F. Mengeling FOUNDING PUBLISHER

Rev. Charles Irvin

Or mail us a letter: Editor FAITH Magazine 209 Seymour Ave. Lansing, MI 48933 Please make sure to add a line granting us permission to print your letter or e-mail. Your thoughts and ideas matter, please share them with us!

FOUNDING EDITOR

FAITH Magazine

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December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

our 95 parishes had not completed their training by the end of the audit period (June 30, 2008). All of the parishes involved are working diligently to correct this problem, and we anticipate being in full compliance by the end of the calendar year. In order to facilitate ease of training for those unable to attend a live session, VIRTUS is now offering Protecting God’s Children sessions online. While live training is still the ideal, the online option makes it possible to ensure that all volunteers have participated. Additionally, criminal background checks are being repeated for all parish employees and for volunteers who have access to minors four or more hours per month on a regular basis. It is our hope these measures will continue and enhance the protected environment we seek for all of our children. It is critical all volunteers take part in this important training in order to protect our children and to ensure their safety. Children are our greatest blessing from God; it is our responsibility to nurture that blessing. If you need additional information, please contact Sally Ellis at sellis@dioceseoflansing.org Dear Editor: I want to tell you what a wonderful magazine we have in FAITH. This October 2008 issue was the best one yet. It is outstanding and real. Thank you and all of your staff for this great evangelizing tool. Mary O’Brien, Linden, Michigan

history quiz

Most Reverend Earl A. Boyea

Lucy, Virgin and Martyr Dec. 13 | John of Kanty, Priest Dec. 23 | Solemnity of the Nativity of the Lord, Chr

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sentenced to prostitution St. Lucy’s story

history quiz

Claim to fame: Lucy was born into a wealthy family. From an early age, she wanted to devote her life to God as a virgin. Her father died while she was still young, however, and her mother desired that Lucy marry. Lucy’s mother had a change of heart, though, after visiting the relics of St. Agatha and being cured of a hemorrhage. Following this episode, she allowed Lucy to distribute the family’s money among the poor. This act angered the man Lucy was unwillingly supposed to marry. He sent her before the Roman governor of Sicily. The governor tried to sentence Lucy to prostitution, but when the time came to take her away, God’s strength filled her and the guards found her too heavy to move. Before her death, Lucy predicted the punishment of the man she was supposed to marry. She also predicted the end of the persecution of Christians, as well as the end of the ruthless Emperor Diocletian’s rule.

Hechos que la hicieron famosa: Lucía nació en una familia pudiente y desde niña quiso consagrar su vida a Dios como una virgen. Sin embargo, su padre murió mientras ella todavía era joven y su madre deseaba que Lucy se casara. No obstante, la madre de Lucía pronto cambió de parecer cuando visitó las reliquias de Santa Ágata y se curó de una hemorragia. Después de este episodio, le permitió a Lucía distribuir el dinero de la familia entre los pobres. Este gesto, sin embargo, enfureció al hombre con quien Lucía debía casarse contra su voluntad. El gobernador trató de sentenciar a Lucía a la prostitución, pero cuando llegó el momento de llevársela, la fuerza de Dios la llenó y los guardias no pudieron moverla porque estaba demasiado pesada. Antes de su muerte, Lucía predijo varias cosas. Primero, ella predijo el castigo del hombre con quién se suponía que ella debía casarse. Segundo, ella predijo el final de la persecución, y también el final del dominio del despiadado emperador Diocleciano.

Why she is a saint: Before her fiancé denounced her to the government, Lucy devoted her life to service of the poor, and gave away most of her family’s fortune. Later, despite being tortured under Diocletian, Lucy never denied or wavered in her faith in God. She endured persecution bravely and willingly suffered for Christ.

Por qué es una santa: Antes de que su prometido la denunciara al gobierno, Lucía consagró su vida a servir a los pobres y regaló la mayor parte de la fortuna de su familia. Posteriormente, a pesar de ser torturada bajo Diocleciano, Lucía nunca negó o flaqueó de su fe en Dios. Ella soportó con valentía la persecución y de buena voluntad sufrió por Cristo.

Best quote: Showing how important purity was to Lucy, she once said, “Those whose hearts are pure are the temples of the Holy Spirit.”

Mejor cita: Demostrando la importancia que tenía para ella la pureza, Lucía una vez dijo: «Aquellos cuyos corazones son puros son los templos del Espíritu Santo».

How she died: After her resistance to prostitution, the Roman governor sentenced her to death by burning at the stake. However, much to the dismay of the Roman officials, God saved Lucy from this fate. Again the governor sentenced her to die, this time by the sword. This attempt to execute Lucy succeeded, and she became a martyr of the church.

Cómo murió: Luego de su resistencia a la prostitución, el gobernador romano la sentenció a morir quemada en la hoguera. Sin embargo, para gran consternación de los funcionarios romanos, Dios salvó a Lucía de este destino. Nuevamente, el gobernador sentenció a Lucía a morir, esta vez por la espada. Este intento de ejecutar a Lucía tuvo éxito, y ella se hizo una mártir de la Iglesia.

His papacy was the longest for 1,000 years The papacy of Pope Adrian I, lasting nearly 24 years, was unequaled in length by any pope for almost 1,000 years. Famous for his resistance to Lombard aggression and for presiding over the Seventh General Council at Nicaea, Pope

Adrian died on Christmas Day, Dec. 25, WHAT YEAR?. The first one to do so since the Vietnam War ended about three decades earlier, a U.S. passenger jet landed in Vietnam on Dec. 10, WHAT YEAR? The first crossword puzzle was printed in the New York World on Dec. 21, WHAT YEAR? Answers: 772, 2004, 1913

Feast day: December 13 Patron saint of sight and the blind Meaning of name: Light

Día festivo: 13 de diciembre Santa patrona de la vista y de los ciegos No se sabe cuándo fue canonizada Significado del nombre: Luz

ativity of the Lord, Christmas Dec 25 | Feast of Stephen, First Martyr Dec. 26 | Feast of John, Apostle and Evangelist Dec. 27 | Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph Dec. 28

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Is there such a thing as an “orthodox” Catholic (as opposed to Greek Orthodox)? I gather it’s a term that implies people are “conservative” Catholics. I heard someone use this expression but I didn’t know there were different degrees or versions of Catholicism. Great question – it’s funny how often we are not careful with our terminology or fail to explain it and, as a result, confusion and chaos ensue. The Catholic Encyclopedia gives us a great explanation: [Orthodox is] the technical name for the body of Christians who use the Byzantine Rite in various languages and are in union with the patriarch of Constantinople, but in schism with the pope of Rome. The epithet Orthodox (orthodoxos), meaning “right believer,” is, naturally, claimed by people of every religion. It is almost exactly a Greek form of the official title of the chief enemies of the Greeks. We’ll take this one step at a time. Let’s start with councils. When we say the church had a council, we are referring to a large gathering of bishops who get together to resolve big issues of the day or big questions confronting Christianity. Vatican II, for example, is one of our councils. Now, when we talk about our Orthodox brothers and sisters, we are talking about a group that accepts the earliest councils in Christianity, but who separated from the church of Rome before

FAITH Magazine

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Dear Fr. Joe Can Catholics be orthodox?

later councils. I think it fair to say that, in most cases, our Orthodox brothers and sisters are with us on everything except where Jesus intended our authority to rest. For Latin-Rite, or Western, Catholics, it rests with the pope of Rome. For the Orthodox, authority rests with the patriarch of a different place. We are, literally, out of communion with our Orthodox brothers and sisters in this case. Why we broke apart has to do with cultural clashes, as well as some religious disputes, such as the filioque, or line in the Nicene Creed that refers to the Holy Spirit: We say the Holy Spirit proceeded from the Father and the Son; the Orthodox say he proceeded from the Father. Most would agree that the key and most tragic moment in all of this came with the sacking of Constantinople by Catholics in 1204. The division intensified that day and some feel the wounds will never be healed. This, in a nutshell, is a description of Orthodox as a religious group. On top of this, within Catholicism, you do find people who refer to themselves as either “orthodox” or striving to be so. I’m one of ’em! What does this mean? Well, again, if you look at the definition from the Catholic Encyclopedia, you see that orthodox literally means “right believer” or “pure worship.” In the Catholic world, this is a word some people use to describe how they follow the teachings of Christ.

As a general rule, those who are of a more traditional bent tend to use it to designate the degree with which they are in union with the church of Rome. In this case, the simple and short explanation is that a person using the word in this context is referring to their concern that they be obedient to what the church says in a literal sense. Also, as a general rule, those of a more progressive bent tend to use it to designate the degree with which they are in union with what they perceive as the ideals behind the teachings from Rome. Again, the simple and short explanation is that a person who uses the term orthodox in this case is referring to his or her obedience to “the spirit of the word.” In case you were wondering, we need both. I remember that in seminary one of the bishops put it this way: “We’ve got people in left field and people in right field. I’m just happy they’re playin’ ball.” I like that. We all should strive to follow Christ as best we can and ditch any prejudice against people who are striving as hard as we are but in a different way. I don’t mean that we passively sit back and allow people to make what we believe to be grievous errors, not at all! I mean that if we feel called to challenge a fellow believer in Christ about his or her theology, we do it in a spirit of love and humility. Jesus gave us one commandment above all: Love one another. Enjoy another day in God’s presence! – Father Joseph Krupp

Send your questions to: “In the Know with Fr. Joe” FAITH Magazine, 209 Seymour Ave., Lansing, MI 48933 Or: JoeInBlack@priest.com Thomas Becket, Bishop and Martyr Dec. 29 | Sylvester I, Pope Dec. 31

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F A I T H

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’til death do us part Is divorce OK?

We asked you, “What do you think about divorce? Is it ever morally acceptable?”

% Yes, two people who don’t love each other shouldn’t stay together.

% Yes, but only in cases of abuse, adultery or addiction.

% No, marriage is for life. No exceptions.

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What does the church teach?

You had this to say

According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, “The Lord Jesus insisted on the original intention of the Creator who willed that marriage be indissoluble. He abrogates the accommodations that had slipped into the old Law. Between the baptized, ‘a ratified and consummated marriage cannot be dissolved by any human power or for any reason other than death.’” However, “if civil divorce remains the only possible way of ensuring certain legal rights, the care of the children, or the protection of inheritance, it can be tolerated and does not constitute a moral offense.”

We asked parishioners at St. Thomas the Apostle Church in Ann Arbor, “Is divorce ever acceptable? Why or why not?

Tell us what YOU would do – log on to the all new FAITHmag.com to vote

Spare the rod and spoil the child? Is it ever OK to use spanking as discipline? Tell us what you think at www.FAITHmag.com.

I think that it’s possible for an annulment, divorce, or a separation to be appropriate. That’s why we have the canon lawyers to help determine when it’s acceptable. There are situations of abuse, situations where people are not free to make commitments to marriage. I believe what the church believes. – Rob, 44 No, it’s not, because of what Jesus said in the Scriptures. From my own standpoint, I am divorced and will not remarry. I have accepted that vow of chastity. – Robert, 67

you said...

What do our readers say?

of Americans think divorce is morally acceptable. – Gallup, May 2008

Yes, for of a lot of reasons. First is cheating – if you cheat on your spouse, the marriage is over. When you’ve lost that trust and respect, all is lost. It depends on the situation. I feel the same way about physical abuse or verbal abuse in a really harsh circumstance, or if your children were abused. – Bonnie, 25

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what in the world? the top-10 Catholic News events this month

Children’s eucharistic holy hour draws worldwide participants – Children from around the world prayed together at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington for the sixth annual Worldwide Children’s Eucharistic Holy Hour.

Scripture is essential to church’s evangelizing mission – At a Mass to open the world Synod of Bishops on the Bible, Pope Benedict XVI said knowledge of Scripture is essential to the church’s evangelizing mission.

Lebanese bishops call on political leaders to work for stability – The Maronite Catholic bishops’ council criticized Lebanon’s political leaders for their failure to cooperate with one another to promote stability.

Court declines to take four abortion-related cases – On the opening day of its fall term, the U.S. Supreme Court declined to hear four cases dealing with abortion or abortion-related protest efforts.

Funds collected to help school, parish programs after hurricanes – The National Catholic Educational Association in Washington has pledged to help Catholic schools and parishes as they recover from the effects of hurricanes Ike and Gustav.

Delegates urge church to put more resources into communications – The Catholic Church needs to put more resources into communications in Africa to help it build peace on the continent, said delegates at a conference for communications professionals.

Bishop approves group seeking sainthood for Massachusetts woman – Bishop Robert McManus of Worcester has given official recognition to an association seeking the canonization of Audrey Santo, a Massachusetts woman.

Bishops urge Haitians granted temporary protected status – The U.S. Catholic bishops have called on President George Bush to grant Haitians temporary protected status for the next 18 months, citing pressing humanitarian reasons.

Four new saints canonized – Pope Benedict XVI canonized four new saints, including the first native-born saint from India, where Christians recently have come under attack from Hindu gangs.

Bible associations sign agreement – The United Bible Societies and the Catholic Biblical Federation signed an agreement during the world Synod of Bishops to work more closely in translating, printing and distributing the Bible and in helping people read it. FAITH Magazine

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Cardinal Francis George

Bishops congratulate Barack Obama on historic election

The U.S. bishops congratulated President-elect Barack Obama, the first African American elected president of the United States, calling the event “historic” and coming at a difficult time. The bishops offered their remarks in a Nov. 4 letter to President-elect Obama from Cardinal Francis George of Chicago, president of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. The letter follows. Dear President-elect Obama, I write to you, in my capacity as president of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, to express our congratulations on your historic election as president of the United States. The people of our country have entrusted you with a great responsibility. As Catholic bishops, we offer our prayers that God give you strength and wisdom to meet the coming challenges. Our country is confronting many uncertainties. We pray that you will use the powers of your office to meet them with a special concern to defend the most vulnerable among us and heal the divisions in our country and our world. We stand ready to work with you in defense and support of the life and

dignity of every human person. May God bless you and Vice President-elect Biden as you prepare to assume your duties in service to our country and its citizens. Sincerely yours, Cardinal Francis George, OMI Archbishop of Chicago President

President-elect Barack Obama

December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com 11/19/08 3:46:26 PM

w o r k

should I pass up a promotion?

The Vatican has prepared three alternative endings for the priest’s words of dismissal at Mass, to emphasize the missionary spirit of the liturgy. Pope Benedict XVI personally chose the three options from suggestions presented to him after a two-year study, Cardinal Francis Arinze told the 2008 Synod of Bishops on the Bible. Cardinal Arinze said the concern was, for many Catholics, that the present words of dismissal sounded like “The Mass is ended, go and rest.” The three alternatives are: “Go and announce the Gospel of the Lord”; “Go in peace and glorifying the Lord by your life”; and “Go in peace.” They were published in October in the latest edition of the Roman Missal. The cardinal said the congregation also was studying another suggestion made during the 2005 synod, of moving the sign of peace to a different part of the Mass. – USCCB

Catholics, Muslims say forum brought them closer

T. Gennara

Members of the newly formed Catholic-Muslim Forum saw their first meeting as a space of dialogue, respect and a growing harmony between people of the two creeds. Cardinal Tauran During the closing ceremony, Cardinal Jean-Louis Tauran, president of the Pontifical Council for Interreligious Dialogue, spoke about the highlights of the historic final declaration, jointly written by members of both religions. “We believe Catholics and Muslims are called to be instruments of love and harmony among believers, and for humanity in general, rejecting any type of oppression, aggressive violence and terrorism, above all when it is committed in the name of religion, and maintaining the principle of justice for all,” the prelate affirmed, citing the declaration. The seminar united a forum of 24 representatives and five advisers from each of the religions and ended with an audience with Pope Benedict XVI. It was organized by the Pontifical Council for Interreligious Dialogue and by the signatories of the October 2007 letter “A Common Word,” which united high-level exponents of various branches of Islam. – ZENIT

how do we ensure that we’re using our potential?

iStockphoto.com

2008 Synod of Bishops address changes to the Mass

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l i f e

Frank has had his current job for many years, and he’s repeatedly been offered other positions with more responsibility, but he’s turned them down.

I’m comfortable where I am, and I’m not looking for any new challenges. Although I do see problems in the management ranks that I know I could solve, ambition for position or money is not what God wants us to pursue. I don’t want to get stuck in the hassle of politics in management. So, I enjoy where I am; I don’t want all that responsibility and attention. – Frank

On the surface, Frank sounds like a humble man who is content where he is, and isn’t tempted by position or money. On the other hand, Frank may have allowed himself to become complacent by not taking full advantage of his talents for the greater well-being of people around him. In his book Good to Great, Jim Collins addresses this danger by saying, “Few people attain great lives, in large because it is just so easy to settle for a good life” (p. 1). We settle for pleasant, comfortable lives, avoiding the greatness we’ve been called to in building God’s kingdom. Collins says that good is the enemy of great. This is exactly what Christ teaches in the parable of the talents. The master rewards the servants who took a chance, invested their talents and multiplied wealth; but admonishes the servant who buried his one talent because he was afraid to risk losing it. Christ calls him lazy and wicked. Likewise, God admonishes us for not investing in

the talents he’s provided us to build his kingdom. While he believes he is being good and humble, Frank may actually be neglecting God’s call. Frank could do much more in serving others by taking a position of greater responsibility, but he’s afraid because it is outside his comfort zone, and he doesn’t want to lose the comfort he has established. Are you living up to God’s expectations? You might ask yourself the following questions to reflect on how God may be calling you: • Are you focused primarily on maintaining your comfortable life; afraid to try something new? • Have you been blessed with gifts or talents that you are not using or investing in serving others? • Do you realize that your gifts and talents are not yours, but they’re God’s, and you have responsibility to invest them as God would? • Do you pray daily to align your motives and desires with God’s expectations? – Tim Ryan

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God and the arts

Did God create

Who is that philosopher? Prior to studying theology, seminarians study philosophy, which is defined as “the love of wisdom.” Many great theologians have thoughts rooted in preChristian or other philosophers, or learn from the arguments against them. We are going to profile some of them in this series. Thomas More Who was he? Thomas More was born in 1478 in England, and was well known as a lawyer, author and statesman. He was married to his first wife, Jane in 1505 and she bore him four children. Jane died in 1511 and he married his second wife, Alice, who was a devoted stepmother. More also adopted her daughter from a previous marriage. What did he do? Sir Thomas was the undersheriff of London from 1510 to 1518. He had a reputation for honesty and honor and was appointed chancellor to the king in 1517. He was a scholar and historian, well known for his fictional work, Utopia, a term he invented. Utopia is an imaginary FAITH Magazine

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island nation with perfect order. In it, there is religious tolerance and no private property. What is he best known for? More assisted King Henry VIII with his Defence of the Seven Sacraments, a response to Martin Luther. When Henry wanted an annulment for his marriage to Catherine of Aragon, he fired Lord Wolsey, the chancellor who had failed to procure it for him, and appointed More in his stead. At this point, the king began his famous claims that the pope was the bishop of Rome only, and therefore had no authority over the entire Christian church. Although More initially supported Henry, he became increasingly convinced that Henry was lapsing into heresy. More was deeply concerned about heresy and the growing Protestant trend in England and had written refutations of Tyndale’s Lutheran tracts. How did he die? In 1534, More refused to sign the Act of Supremacy, which made King Henry the head of the English church. He was imprisoned in the Tower of London and beheaded. The church recognizes him as a martyr and he was canonized in 1935. In 2000, he was proclaimed the patron saint of politicians.

Meet the theologians:

Father Stevens

Father Schoenstene

FAITH interviewed Father Gladstone Stevens, who is vice-rector of St. Mary Seminary, Baltimore. Father Robert Schoenstene is a Scripture professor at Mundelein Seminary in the Archdiocese of Chicago.

If God created everything, did he create evil? Father Stevens: Isaiah says ‘yes.’ If he didn’t, then there must be another creator. The question is, what do we mean by evil? In 2 Is 45, God says, “I am the Lord. I have chosen Cyrus ….” The Jews were in exile in Babylon and Cyrus, king of Persia, lets them go home. For Isaiah, Cyrus is the anointed of God. This goes along with the question of how God works in history. Somehow, this

Many philosophers and theologians, such as Hans Urs von Balthasar, believe that the human creative drive is a reflection of the divine creator. Throughout history, artists of all kinds – from poets and painters to sculptors and songwriters – have attempted to express their understanding of God. Each month, FAITH presents a sample: God’s Grandeur, by Gerard Manley Hopkins The world is charged with the grandeur of God. It will flame out, like shining from shook foil; It gathers to a greatness, like the ooze of oil Crushed. Why do men then now not reck his rod? To read the rest of this beautiful poem by Jesuit Father Gerard Manley Hopkins, visit www.FAITHmag. com.

10 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com 11/19/08 3:47:33 PM

are you a heretic? What do you believe about God the Father as he relates to the Holy Spirit? Do you think that the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit are three “offices” of the same one God? So that God as Father creates, God as Son saves and God as Holy Spirit is with us now? If so, this is the heresy of modalism. The church teaches that God is three distinct persons in one being, the Godhead. A major proponent of this heresy was Sabellius, but it was rejected by all the early church fathers.

empire builder, Cyrus, is doing Zoroastrianism, posited two equal what God has in mind at the powers – good and evil. They are time. God says, “I am the Lord, locked in battle. Isaiah does not there is no want to posit Evil is the privation other. I create another god, light; I create he wants to of being, not a being. darkness. I posit the unity create shalom; of God. But but I also by evil, Isaiah create rah probably has (evil).” Some in mind the translations balk at that; they’ll say Babylonian exile, which God has woe or bad times, but Isaiah is created. But now God has created being very blunt there. The reason the Israelites’ return. What looked is that the religion of the Persians, like evil is now good. God is

Pure evil would be nothing.

Bible Quiz Where in the world …

It has a famous river, a beautiful queen, pyramids and sarcophagi. Many biblical characters spent time there, from Joseph to Moses. When they were being hunted by Herod, Mary and Joseph fled there with their new baby. What is this land that has been both prison and refuge?

Turn to page 31 for the answer

symbols

Triquetra From the Latin for “threecornered,” the triquetra can be interpreted simply as being a triangle, but it has also absorbed the form of another shape, the vesica piscis, or “bladder of the fish.” This shape is formed by two intersecting circles and resembles a lens. The triquetra combines allusions to the early Christian symbol of a fish, eternity as represented by a continuous line, and the Trinity.

behind it. The problem is what we perceive as evil may not work out that way. Systematic theologians would say that God permits evil. There is a mystery here. God did not create moral evil, but he created the ability to choose it. We don’t know good unless we know evil. The freedom that comes from God gives us terrible possibilities, and the sad reality is that humanity so often makes the wrong choice. Augustine’s view is that moral evil is a lack of being. It’s a denial of real being, which is good. But what you don’t want to do is propose a dualism, where God created good but then the devil came and made everything bad. People blame the devil for a lot of stuff he doesn’t have to do. Father Schoenstene: Nope. This is something we recognize deep within our tradition. St. Augustine recognized this possibly more clearly than anyone else: Evil is the privation of being, not a being. Pure evil would be nothing. We can look at Exodus – when God encounters Moses, he says “I AM” – I am not one being among others, I AM being. I am the one who is. God is that from which other things receive being. So, the more we depart from God – through sin, through evil – we more we depart, not only from God, but from existence itself. Evil arises from our free will to depart from God. – Elizabeth Solsburg

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m a r r i a g e

m a t t e r s

ue and Jack are planning a trip to Paris. They’re disagreeing about how much planning is involved.

We’re going to Paris – let’s plan! Jack says: Sue and I both have vacation time coming next summer. I’d like to plan a trip to Europe. I’ve gotten all the books and guides, and I’m ready to set up a detailed itinerary so that we can get the most out of this trip.

Can’t we just ‘wing it’? Sue says: I’m really excited about our vacation, too. But Jack wants to over-plan every detail. I just want to wander around Paris, finding little cafés and exploring. Can’t we just be spontaneous? Congratulations on agreeing to the destination and that one of you is not hauling the other out of his or her comfort zone; the rest is easy! There is actually room for both of your desires to be met because both methods are needed to keep your activities and free time on track; yet not so rigidly on track that it becomes boring or frustrating. Communicating with one another is essential in planning this amazing trip, so that each of you receives joy in seeing and experiencing in Paris what is most important to you both. We can call it ‘detailed spontaneity’ or ‘spontaneous details,’ depending on who wins the coin toss. Unless you are millionaires and can afford spur-of-the-moment pricing, a certain amount of pre-planning is essential so that you are not paying outrageous prices for the last remaining seats in the nose-bleed section at a sold-out concert or show. Tom and I were fortunate to be able to live overseas during our early years of marriage and we know firsthand that, without a plan when visiting some of the world’s exotic sights, some regrets will surface in later life. We regretted not seeing some of the “more important” venues in the areas we visited. FAITH Magazine

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12 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

He said She said what do they do?

Of course we have rationalized our regrets by saying, “We will go to those places on our next visit!” Sadly, that opportunity doesn’t always happen. Often, the journey (planning) can be as good or better than the actual event and it gives both of you an opportunity to discuss your desires for this vacation. Realize that there probably will be a time during the trip when compromising will be the order of the day because of weather or health issues. So you might as well start the compromising during the planning phase. Tom and I believe you both have the right idea about your vacation, so long as both

of you can become energized from your time together. Some people are energized through activities, while others are energized through relaxation. The truth for most couples is a happy medium; a little of both can serve both needs. If this is a once-in-a-lifetime trip, we certainly recommend that Jack and Sue develop a plan of action that fulfills both needs before arriving in Paris.

Deacon Tom Fogle is director of family life ministry, a ministr

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p a r e n t i n g

hether it’s in your wallet, it’s nearly always on your mind. Money – and how to manage it – is a topic many of us wrestle with daily. We turned to Ted Zale, a veteran financial adviser, for some practical advice during an unpredictable time. Here’s a tip that can help you today: OK, so even some people with a solid fiscal foundation still have sweaty palms. Why? It has something to do with that 5-year-old spooning Cheerios into his mouth at the kitchen table. Some day, he’s going to college. And some day is sooner than you think. Never fear, according to Zale, who suggests purchasing a 529 college savings plan, an account that grows tax free to help parents pay for college. Nearly every state has a 529 plan and you don’t have to be a resident to invest. The idea is simple: Parents and grandparents contribute to the 529, which is invested in the market and — though

there is risk — grows over the years into a tidy sum to crack open when junior hits campus. The money is taxed when it’s withdrawn (usually at the student’s lower tax bracket). “You pay at the end which allows the money to compound faster,” Zale said. The 529 plan can be used for vocational education or transferred to another family member if the student doesn’t attend college.

DIOCESAN

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how to help your child cope

You want to be their source of information when they are worried.

A certain amount of planning is inevitable, so taking a break from a well-planned trip to enjoy a leisurely stroll along the Champs-Elysées and a lunch at a sidewalk café can add spice to your cake. An important tip to remember: It is not about ‘my’ vacation, it is about ‘our’ vacation – you, me and God. In marriage, God calls us to lift up our partners and to make our spouses the most important person in the relationship. When we focus on satisfying our spouses’ desires, we are most often surprised at how our own desires are satisfied also. Go in the Spirit of love like a young bride loves her spouse and see what exciting memories the two of you can make. Bon voyage! – Tom and JoAnne Fogle

nistry, a ministry supported by the DSA.

dealing with disaster

iStockphoto.com

How can I afford to send my kids to college?

j o u r n e y

ows of Boys Scouts sitting in high-school bleachers call up images of award ceremonies. But last summer, after a tornado ripped through an Iowa Boy Scout camp and killed four teenagers, the bleachers held rows of survivors. Anguished parents had gathered in a community center while officials determined whether each child had been taken to the morgue, one of several hospitals or the school. Fourteen-year-old Trevor Ruffcom, helping out after the tornado, told a reporter from the Omaha World-Herald, “Sights I’ve seen, I’m never going to forget.” As parents, there is a longing to protect our children from anything unpleasant: vaccinations that hurt, children who tease them, unrequited love. But, most of all, we want to protect them from death and disaster. What should parents say when these images scroll across the TV or leap out from the newspaper? “Don’t be afraid; just believe” (Mark 5:36). One of the most horrifying aspects of the Iowa tornado was that the children were at a camp, separated from their parents. We can never promise our children that we’ll always be there in life-threatening situations. We don’t have that kind of control – as much as we long for it. But we can help our children grow in a relationship with God, who will always be there for them. Boy Scout Thomas White told staff writers from the Omaha World-Herald that he was nearly hit by a log and “I was praying, saying, ‘Don’t let me get sucked up.’ My glasses came off, and I grabbed them. I didn’t want to die. Surprisingly, I was calm – but the adrenaline was going.” Thomas’ story shows that our bodies can be reacting with fear even as our communication with God through prayer helps maintain calm. Address their concerns. If you don’t answer children’s questions, then they will think some topics are off limits. You want to be their source of information when they are worried. Take their ages into account when giving details. Let them know these events don’t happen very often. Explain what your family would do in a similar situation. For example, “Tornadoes are scary because the wind is so strong, but our house has a strong basement and so we go down there, say a prayer, play games and read.” Review life-saving strategies, such as what to do if a smoke detector goes off, in a serious but matter-offact way. Children sometimes try to hide from a fire and the gear of a firefighter sometimes looks frightening to a young child. Make sure the lines of communication are open so that children discuss their fears as they learn of different events in the news. – Dr. Cathleen McGreal

SERVICES

APPEAL

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The other vocation crisis

FAITH Magazine

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14 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com 11/19/08 3:49:33 PM

f r o m

t h e

b i s h o p

e have a vocation crisis in America. This is not what you think. It is a vocation crisis in marriage. Many are no longer getting married – and too many do not see their marriage as a sacrament, a means of grace for themselves and their families. Yet marriage and family are the natural heart of our society and the spiritual core of our church. Pope John Paul II stated in St. Louis in January 1999: “As the family goes, so goes the nation!” Now, most of us know the solutions to this difficulty since we have seen very healthy marriages and thus know what they look like. I think of my own parents, who have been married for 58 years. They are not perfect. However, they do exhibit that fidelity, commitment and love which are the hallmarks of a good marriage. Marriage is a communion of persons wherein new life is the fruit of love. The two purposes of marriage are the unitive (love of the couple) and procreative (blessings of children). Sexual expression is to be the deepest manifestation of these two purposes. Unfortunately, for the past 50 years, there has been growing not only a division between these two, but a chasm. It began with seeking to have marital relations without having children. Soon, however, sexual relations became completely separated from both love and children. How do we get out of this mess? I would suggest five things.

1 2 3 4 5

First of all, we, married and single, need to know better who we are as created by God. Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body is vital to that process. Fundamentally, this means that we see ourselves as created in the image of the loving Trinity, where we really become human only in the total gift of ourselves, imitating the gift of Christ to us. The Trinity and the cross must be the center of every Christian’s life. This will give meaning to marriage, as well as to religious and priestly vocations. Second, we need to counter the contraceptive mentality of our society, which has helped to create this gap between sexual activity, and love and children. The best way to do this is to promote Natural Family Planning. We know that commitment and companionship, based on hard work and dedication, are the solid bedrocks of a successful marriage. NFP supports this completely, and clearly invites into the marriage that one partner who is most needed: God. NFP is simple, satisfying and effective; and it engages the couple more completely in the family planning process. NFP does not change our bodily nature nor our bodily relationship; rather, it respects what is God-given. Third, we need to recognize that marriage is good for us. Marriage “helps to overcome self-absorption, egoism, pursuit of one’s own pleasure, and to open oneself to the other, to mutual aid and to self-giving.” (Catechism of the Catholic Church #1609) Marriage also can teach us the equality of men and women and their clear differences and complementarity by working toward a loving unity. Fourth, we need to recall that marriage is good for children. Children in intact families are more likely to be successful and less likely to experience a myriad of evils that surround us. The roles of mother and father and their healthy interactions are important for the development of boys and girls and show them the beauty of faithful and eternal love. This is the best gift that a husband and wife can give to their children. Finally, we need to pray and to celebrate the sacraments. Praying as a family, and praying as a couple are vital. Recourse to reconciliation and the Eucharist are essential for ourselves and for assisting our spouse and our family on their journey to heaven. Jesus commanded us to eat his flesh and drink his blood. Not doing so would mean that we would have no life in us. How can we share life, our life or any life, with our spouse or children if we do not have that life within us. Marriage is essential for our society, for our church, and mostly for our salvation. Let us work and pray for the building of this great sacrament of service. – Bishop Earl A. Boyea is the fifth bishop of the Diocese of Lansing.

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Marriage is in trouble. Some estimates are that more than 50 percent of them fail. In his column, Bishop Boyea addresses some of the sacramental elements of marriage. In the following stories, we meet three couples who are living that sacrament every day. Brandon and Melissa recently participated in the Engaged Encounter program to plan for life after the wedding day. Matt and Lisa are in busy careers and are busier parents – and they have to find time to nurture their marriage. Dan and Marge are in the “golden years” of marriage – reflecting on what has kept them best friends for nearly half a century. We hope their stories will inspire you, challenge you and help you enrich your own marriages.

FAITH Magazine

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22 T. Gennara

P. Shippert

For nearly half a century, Marge and Dan McPartlin have been making marriage work. When you meet them, you want to know what their secret is – how have they stayed best friends. – By Margaret Ann Cross

11/19/08 3:51:26 PM

c o v e r

s t o r y

att and Lisa chat with FAITH about how they are successfully juggling faith, work, parenthood and marriage.

Matt: I’ve tried to think about how I live out my faith in my work and my life. There are a number of parallels between how the church asks us to practice our faith and what I expect from my athletes. The church has a vision for us to act as Christ – the highest of standards! This is impossible, of course, but the church realizes that perfection is not something we can attain. Instead it challenges us to find smaller ways to imitate Christ in the world. In achieving its vision, the church sets a path of choices and expects and guides us to make the right ones. Athletics are similar but with a smaller purpose and standards based on athletic performance. Coaches need to have a vision of what a team should look like in the future and be able to break down the path from present to future in measurable and attainable steps. Coaches often see more in athletes than the athletes see in themselves, and we push them to make choices to bring out their best. Lisa: Matt, I think you do something else, too – you see the best in every rower. The church tells us to see the face of Jesus in every person we meet, but that’s not something that’s easy for everyone. FAITH Magazine

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I try to do that, but I just can’t see it in every person. You find something good in every rower and you help her to build on that good to achieve her potential. Matt: I guess I just see that as coaching. There are 86 Division I rowing teams in the U.S. We will outwork some of them, but not the top programs. There comes a time when effort is not enough. It is the team’s ability to be more effective with their effort that allows it to win at the elite level. This requires a coach to see the best in every team member and build on both her strengths and her weaknesses. In athletics, you get measured every week by winning or losing. Everyone wants to win. That’s why you compete. But you can’t coach winning. You need to coach on process and effectiveness. You can only win if every person on your team works smarter, harder, faster and stronger than their competition. That means seeing the best in every team member and helping her build on her strengths. Lisa: That last race will be won literally by fractions of a second. So in the end it really is smarter, harder, faster and stronger.These races last

about 6-and-a-half minutes. By the end of two minutes, your legs feel sore. At four minutes they’re numb, and by six minutes you’ve lost all feeling in them. It’s grueling. Matt: I never thought of my work as seeing the face of Christ in each person. That’s just my job as a coach. I never use religion in coaching. Lisa: You’re more of a St. Francis of Assisi kind of coach. “Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words.” I think your Catholic faith and the discipline and values of the church are so ingrained in you, that you don’t recognize you’re living them. It’s

just what you do. Lisa: As a biology teacher, one challenge I face in living my faith is explaining evolution. Some believe religion and evolution are opposed. As I see it, evolution and faith are two separate realms. When my students say they can’t believe in evolution, I tell them, “I would never want you to change your beliefs or the beliefs your family holds. But I do want you to learn how biologists understand evolution.” That usually removes the taboo so they can open their minds to the science. Lisa: My parents are teachers and scientists who do not practice any kind of or-

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ganized religion. They didn’t instill that taboo in me. On the other hand, I never got the benefit of the structure Catholicism provided in Matt’s life. Still, when Matt and I got married, I didn’t want to become Catholic just because Matt was. We explored a lot of faiths and went to all kinds of churches. But in the end, we came back to the Catholic Church. I enrolled in RCIA and was baptized into the church at the Easter Vigil in 1997. My parents gave me the principles of family first and treating people with respect. Even though they don’t follow any religion, they are always so proud and supportive of me, and this includes

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my Catholic faith. They were at the Masses when our kids and I were baptized and when our oldest daughter made her first Communion. I love sitting in church as a family. I find it very relaxing. It just feels right to go. I like knowing we’re connected to thousands of people all over the world sharing in the same communion. I like going through the sacraments with our kids and having our whole family come to celebrate them. We help young couples prepare for their marriages by hosting them for FOCUS surveys. I think those are other ways we live our faith. Having prayer to guide and comfort us, especially through stressful times is

another thing that means a lot to me. I talk to God often, especially when I’m facing big decisions.” Matt: (Smiling) I think your faith is stronger than mine. Lisa: I think God led me to you. Lisa: We met when we were both on the MSU Club team. We didn’t really ‘date’ for another year or so, but I think everyone on the team knew we were meant to be together. We were friends and teammates before we fell in love. We still like being around each other and being

friends. Prayer does give me comfort, but there’s nothing like a good hug from Matt! We find comfort in each other. Our 2-year old has a pink comfort blanket we call ‘Night-Night.’ The other evening as I was tucking her in, she asked me, ‘Mommy, what’s your Night-Night?’ I automatically answered, ‘Daddy. Daddy is my NightNight.’ I like that thought. As their children play just outside, Matt and Lisa smile at each other, quietly seeing the face of Christ smiling back, and happily living their life and faith together.

If you are interested in RCIA, contact your parish’s RCIA director.

11/19/08 3:52:35 PM

f e a t u r e

s t o r y

How do we know if we should get

What we learned from Engaged Encounter

t the crack of dawn one Saturday morning last October, a young couple were making their way to Jackson to spend a weekend with complete strangers. But they had a common bond with these strangers. The strangers were other couples engaged to be married. Melissa Collins and Brandon Krugh are one of more than nearly 20,000 couples that participate in an Engaged Encounter weekend annually in the United States. Engaged Encounter weekends are held in all 50 states, as well as at least 10 other countries. In the Lansing area, Sue and Wayne Fransted serve as the program’s local coordinators. “The goal of Catholic Engaged Encounter is to encourage the couples to reach within themselves to examine the hope they have that their marriage be lifelong, that love is forever and that God is present within their committed love relationship,” says Sue. She explains that each weekend is set up in a retreat format. It is designed to be a time in which couples can get away from the hustle and bustle of their FAITH Magazine

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daily lives and focus on their building a strong foundation for their married lives. “Wayne and I love seeing what a positive impact Engaged Encounter has on the couples.” Melissa and Brandon tell us what they’ve learned about themselves, each other, marriage and their faith as they’ve participated in Engaged Encounter: When have you seen or experienced true love? How did it affect you? Brandon: I think that the best example of true love that I have ever experienced would be that of my grandmother and

20 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

late grandfather. They did not always agree, things were not always perfect, but when push came to shove they were always one until the day my grandfather passed away. The love they had for each other was passed down through their children and grandchildren. I do believe that the love they exhibited was a direct reflection of God’s love for his children. Melissa: I have seen true love in my parents’ relationship with each other. They may have their arguments, but they work through everything and come out with more love and understanding for each other in the end. I know that they love each other unconditionally because I see it every day in the things they do for each other. I want to have an unconditional love relationship like they do, and I have found that person I want to have that relationship with in Brandon. I experience true love every day I am with Brandon in every-

By Kevin Duffy | Photography by Philip Shippert 11/19/08 3:53:19 PM

thing that we do together and I want it to last a lifetime! What is the best thing your parents did for you? Brandon: The best thing my parents did for me was instill in me a passion for helping others. I have really taken this to heart and it has been something that drives me until this day. It is the reason that I volunteer to coach football and basketball at our local high school, and look forward to being a very active member in our community through our faith. Melissa: The best thing my parents did for me was be great role models in every aspect of life. They showed me what love was and how to love others, they showed me that helping other people is important, and they showed how to live life to its fullest. What are the most important things you gained from your Engaged Encounter experience? Brandon: A better understanding of the basic foundation of the Catholic faith. And it gave Melissa and me a chance to focus on our relationship together with God in an environment that was both comfortable and conducive to our growth. Melissa: A deeper understanding of our relationship and how God is involved in it and the lifelong commitment we are making to each other by getting married. We also learned how to communicate with each other in a way that enhances our relationship. What are the most interesting things you gained from your Engaged Encounter experience? Brandon: An understanding that even though Melissa and I both grew up in different faiths, we had the same Christian values. This was important to me, because it showed me that both of us

are strong in our beliefs.

Marriage preparation

Melissa: I discovered that Brandon and I really do have the same outlook and feelings about the important things in life. We are on the same page, which is good because it means we understand each other’s point of view and know what the other one is feeling.

Are those wedding bells ringing for you? Remember it is called the “big day” for a reason – it can take over your life in a way that causes you to lose sight of everything else – including your relationship! There’s the church, cake, reception, caterer, menu, music, dress, invitations, place settings, centerpieces, groomsmen, bridesmaids, rings, ushers, rehearsal, first dances, registering for gifts and the honeymoon. Overwhelmed yet? Well, before setting that date, don’t forget to talk about life after the wedding day!

Is there anything you would want someone who may attend an Engaged Encounter weekend in the future to know? Brandon: Yes! Take full advantage of the opportunity presented to you. It is a chance for you to grow as a couple and address several important issues before entering into the sacrament of marriage. For Melissa and me, it was an opportunity for us to get to know God better as a couple. Melissa: The thing I think people should know who may attend Engaged Encounter is that there is a lot of communication that happens on important topics that can be either positive or negative, depending on how the two people talk about them. You have to be open-minded. It has the potential to bring couples a lot closer, and Brandon and I became closer than ever because of everything we shared throughout the weekend. It is a perfect opportunity to welcome God into your relationship and let him walk with you through the marriage preparation process. What is the best part of being Catholic? The worst? Brandon: I’m not Catholic … yet! Melissa: The best part about being Catholic is believing in God and his power to help you through tough situations and believing that he is there for you no matter what. The worst part is the potential to lose faith when things are not going well for you. You have to rely on him during the times it is most difficult to do so.

For more information about marriage preparation, contact your parish six to nine months before your planned wedding date.

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4 Questions • Who do I say I am? • Who do you say I am? • Who do I say you are? • Who do you say you are? Make sure you consider the questions in terms of the following: Marriage: expectations, vision, purpose of marriage, image of a good wife, image of a good husband, view of divorce Faith: its importance and how it is expressed (what does this mean for children?) Sex: expectations, attitudes, its importance, making peace with the past Children: when to start, how to plan Money: view of money, how to/who will manage the money Family: family history, the role of extended family Interests: activities needed to be healthy physically, emotionally, spiritually Career : its importance and whose might take precedence Location/Place: its importance A sacramental marriage is a reflection of Christ’s relationship to the church – one of communion in preparation for eternal life with the divine communion of the Blessed Trinity. Building the foundation of the marriage on the truth of who each person authentically is prior to the wedding will help protect the couple from entering into a superficial relationship based on false images and expectations. This in turn will go a long way in ensuring a life-long marriage that perpetuates the joy felt on that “big day.”

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p r o f i l e

The ups and downs of a

hen friends introduced Dan and Margaret McPartlin in October 1958, the couple began a conversation that has lasted nearly five decades. The topics over the years have ranged from faith and politics to health and family, but when they met that fall, it was simply two young people discovering they liked each other’s company. “One of my friends was dating someone who worked at the bank with Marge, and they arranged a double date,” Dan says. Sitting in the living room of their comfortable Tecumseh home, they quietly debate whether that first meeting took place at a football game or a party. But they both admit to having been nervous. It took Dan two weeks to call Marge for a second date, but after that, they quickly began seeing each often. “We enjoyed getting to know each FAITH Magazine

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other,” Dan says. “We did a lot of talking.” “We spent many evenings together over a pizza,” Marge says. They discovered that they both liked music and sports, they valued family and they shared their faith. Today, conversation over dinner sometimes includes one or more of their four grown children and a few of their six grandchildren. The couple has faced many joys and several life-changing challenges, but that steady, long-running dialogue with each other, and with God, has kept them focused on what matters most. And they are able to look for the good in every situation, they say. “Through everything that’s happened, we’ve been blessed,” Marge says. “It seems like you’re always taken care of,” Dan agrees. The marriage began with a mutual proposal – a decision made together – but Dan gave Marge a ring as a surprise one night after a prayer service they attended weekly. They both wanted a large family. Their first hurdle, however, happened shortly after they were married, when Dan learned he had been drafted into the Army. After his basic training, the couple

22 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

After half a century, Dan and Marge are still best friends

moved to a base in Killeen, Texas. Neither had been away from their families before. “It was difficult at first,” Marge says. “Dan went out on maneuvers, and I didn’t know anyone.” They turned to the local Catholic church and met a group of men and women who were part of the Catholic Lay Mission Corps and were ministering to underprivileged children in the area. They quickly felt at home. “The volunteers were the same age as we were, and the church had wonderful priests.” “It turned out to be a good time for us,” Dan says. “It put us in a position to work out problems on our own – long-distance phone calls back to our parents were expensive.” “It also taught us how important it was to reach out to others,” Marge says. “Plus, we learned to live on a shoestring budget, and that was a good thing.” The people they met in Texas inspired Dan to think about his future, and he went back to school to earn a degree in sociology, once he finished his stint in the military and the couple returned to Michigan.

By Margaret Ann Cross | Photography by Tom Gennara 11/19/08 3:53:49 PM

It wasn’t long after he finished school, however, before they were faced with their next big challenge. Marge was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 29. “It was a shock,” she says. “We had never dealt with anything like that, and it was upsetting because we hadn’t started our family yet.” Breast cancer wasn’t talked about much then – your friends and your family were your support group. So she turned again to her faith and to Dan. “Marge was very strong,” Dan says. “We did a lot of praying.” “Dan kept me on track,” Marge says. And again, they saw good in the situation. They had wanted children for years, but had not been able to conceive. “The cancer may have taken our minds off not having kids,” Marge says, “because after my treatment, I became pregnant with our first child.” Their children, two girls and two boys, came in pretty quick succession. They were joyous years, Dan and Marge say. After their second daughter was born, Dan took a job at Boysville of Michigan, a residence for troubled youth run by Holy Cross Children’s Services and the Brothers of the Holy Cross, which is based in Clinton. Dan and Marge rented a farmhouse nearby and stayed 37 years. “After growing up in Detroit, it was very different, but once we got used to it, we liked it,” Marge says. “The children found many things they enjoyed doing together. One of their favorites was being outside playing sports with their dad. We had nice neighbors and a big garden. It was ideal.” The house was only three miles from Boysville, so Dan often came home for lunch to see the children and to talk with Marge. The family also spent time at Boysville, having dinner with the brothers and attending Mass at the chapel. The McPartlins’ oldest daughter, Mary Kay, was married in the chapel. “That’s how much it meant to her,” Dan says. But by 1989, the family faced more rough times. In September, Marge’s older sister passed away. In October, they lost Marge’s mother. And in December of that

year, Marge found out that the lining of her heart was filled with fluid and she needed surgery. “For me, that was a time when I really felt the presence of the Lord,” she says. “Everything happened so fast.” “It was scary,” Dan says. “But our prayers were answered.” Marge’s surgery went well, and she regained her health. The McPartlins moved out of their farmhouse into a condominium in Tecumseh a few years after Dan retired from Boysville. They picked the home because the whole family can fit in the finished downstairs level for holiday meals. The living room holds a large screen of pictures of the grandchildren. “The McPartlin Gallery,” Marge says. “The kids joke and call it ‘the shrine.’” They see their children and grandchildren often – all live within two-anda-half hours of Tecumseh – and their children have inherited their penchant for communicating. Family get-togethers are lively, and three-way phone calls are common. Marge and Dan also keep busy at St. Elizabeth Parish in Tecumseh. Marge is a lector and has been on the RCIA team for 13 years. Dan is an extraordinary minister of holy Communion, part of the Helping Hands organization and has served on the parish council. They both deliver Meals on Wheels, and they taught religious education classes when their children were young. They also enjoy reading, watching sports and music. It all gives them a lot to talk about, even though it can’t be easy to keep a conversation animated and interesting for 48 years. “You have to work at not being selfcentered,” Dan says. “You have to respect each other, and you have to laugh.” “We’re always truthful and honest with each other,” Marge says. “And we always talk things out. We’ve had times when we have had disagreements, and we have always worked them out. Through the good times and the difficult times, we have always felt the presence of God in our lives.”

Visit www.dioceseoflansing.org for information about marriage programs in the Diocese of Lansing. A ministry supported by the DSA.

Putting marriage in FOCCUS – the marriage preparation inventory in the Diocese of Lansing In the Diocese of Lansing and in many other dioceses across the U.S., the FOCCUS tool is used as part of the marriage preparation program. Couples are presented with statements and indicate whether they agree with them or not. Ideally, their answers will be the same. The preferred answer is one that most couples have given, but there are not “right” and “wrong” responses. However, some responses are red flags that indicate to the FOCCUS facilitator or pastor that further discussion is needed. This scientifically validated instrument helps couples ensure that they have talked about life’s important questions before the wedding day. Sample questions follow – how would you and your spouse answer? FOCCUS questions

We are in agreement about the husband and wife roles each of us expects of the other in our marriage relationship.

2 3

There are qualities about my future spouse that I do not respect.

We have discussed the ways our families solved problems and how this may affect our problem solving.

4 5 6 7 8 9 10

We disagree with each other over some teachings of the church. My future spouse and I have agreed we will not have children. I am concerned that in-laws may interfere in our marriage relationship. My future spouse and I can talk about our sexual fears, hopes and preferences. We are in agreement about how we will make financial decisions between us. I sometimes feel that this may not be the right person for me to marry.

My future spouse and I agree that our marriage commitment means we intend to pledge love under all circumstances.

DIOCESAN

SERVICES

APPEAL

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s p e c i a l

r e p o r t

ornography has become a global epidemic. According to the 2006 Internet Filter Review, sales of pornography topped $97 billion worldwide. Much of that money came from the growing Internet pornography industry. According to statistics from comScore Media Metrix, 61.9 million unique visitors accessed porn sites in December 2005, while a 2007 study conducted by the University of New Hampshire showed that 42 percent of Internet users age 10 to 17 said that they had viewed online porn in some form within the last year.

What can we do to cure it? Online purity resources www.dads.org – This site provides a lot of resources for porn addiction, but also for being a better Christian man. www.trueknights.org – recovery from a strictly Catholic FAITH Magazine

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The Diocese of Lansing’s response to the expansion of pornography into the average home is the formation of the Diocesan Committee to Develop a Pastoral Response to Pornography. The committee, commissioned by Bishop Carl Mengeling in early 2007, is chaired by Pete Ries, director of evangelization, RCIA and adult faith formation for the Diocese of Lansing. Other members of the committee include diocesan directors, as well as parish program leaders from across the diocese. “What we’re trying to do is to develop resources for adults, for parents to use with their families, for young adults, for middle-school and highschool teens and for children,” Ries said. “We’re going to communicate directly to the pastors and the parish staff because they have contact with all kinds of people through what they do,” said Ries. “So some of the resources are going to be for them to use with their people, some of the resources can be used directly by individuals.” He explained that the committee plans to work to provide age-appropriate materials to parish program leaders and parents alike to communicate the dangers of pornography with young children. Ries explained that providing materials for pre-teens and teens could prove to be more challenging. “It’s a little more dicey, I think, when you are talking about middle-school and high-school teens because they are probably already aware of pornography. Most of them have accessed it – usually by accident,” Ries said. “They’re doing their homework or looking something up on the Internet and something pops up and then they

perspective. www.no-porn.com – This site promotes a lot of products (books, software, etc.) to help in recovery, but it also has a great support board. www.pureintamacy.org – This site has resources for both parents and couples.

24 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

By Kevin Duffy 11/19/08 3:54:12 PM

follow it and all of the sudden they are inside a porn site.” Ries explained that the resources the committee develops will take many forms, including informational seminars for those who interact most closely with young people, as well as leaflets, DVDs and Web sites aimed at each segment of the population. While the diocese does not currently offer a specific program for those suffering from an addiction to pornography, Ries says that resources will be posted on the diocesan Web site. He also said that the committee will have access to programs developed in other dioceses from which to draw ideas for effectively reaching people. “Pornography is different now than it was 20 years ago,” said Ries. “Twenty years ago, we didn’t have the Internet. Because of the Internet, not only is access so much more pervasive, but the amount of pornography is much greater than it used to be.” While the Internet has allowed for easier access to pornography, it has also become a resource for those looking to free themselves from their addiction. The Internet is filled with resources from support message boards where recovering porn addicts can offer each other words of encouragement to multimedia software that offer practical solutions for combating porn addiction. Ries went on to explain his expectations for the committee. “We hope this committee can help people avoid getting trapped. Hopefully this committee can help people when they stumble across pornography to respond in an appropriate way, and hopefully this committee can help people who have been addicted to move beyond it.” While the porn industry is certain to continue to seek out opportunities to infiltrate our homes, Ries stated that the committee hopes to help people live successful lives in spite of being surrounded by sleaze. “Our world includes pornography. I don’t anticipate that changing. So what we’re trying to do is to help people live a moral life in a world that includes pornography.”

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“I was addicted to porn” one man’s road from addiction FAITH interviewed a young husband and father who struggled with, and overcame, an addiction to pornography. We share his story so that others may find hope for healing. I began experimenting with pornography before I became a teenager. I’m not exactly certain of when I first looked at porn, but I recall being in middle school. It started innocently. I was curious. I was young. I was stupid. But most seriously, I was entering a world that held its grip on me for more than a decade. It started with magazines and progressed to videos. By the time I reached college, the Internet was my porn resource of choice. I would spend hours jumping from site to site, indulging in an addiction that consumed me. Few people knew what I was doing, and those who did know didn’t act as though they cared. And then something happened. I met my future wife. We dated for nearly a year before I first revealed to her the struggle I was experienc-

ing. I made a promise to her that I would stop viewing porn. And I kept that promise – for a while. Eventually I would fall back into the world of porn. The next few years included a series of discoveries and broken promises. I sought the counsel of friends and priests, but I could not bring myself out of the vicious cycle. I wanted it. I needed it. I couldn’t help myself. After my wife and I were married, I found myself relapsing. I would stay up late at night looking at porn while my wife slept. I was back to spending hours upon hours bouncing around the Internet fulfilling my lust. And then in October 2006, my wife discovered what I had been

doing. I had never seen her as angry or as hurt. My marriage was on the brink of falling apart. The following days included a lot of tears and even more thoughtful reflection and discussion. I finally realized the selfishness of my actions. Rather than focus my attention on my wife and our marriage, my attention was focused on myself. I had never been more ashamed, but with the support of my wife and God’s grace, I am proud to say that I am more than a year and half removed from the grip of pornography. Porn nearly took the most important person in my life away from me, but my marriage is stronger today because of our commitment to one another. God is great!

Tips to avoid pornography •D on’t allow children to keep a personal computer in their room. •D on’t put the family computer in an out-of-the-way room. Instead, put the computer in a highly visible part of the home, such as the family room. “That way anyone who’s using it, it’s obvious what’s going on,” explained Ries. •U se parental control programs to prevent children from stumbling into an Internet porn site.

11/19/08 3:54:14 PM

What to do with all those cards

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c u l t u r e

very January, it happens. I collect the beautifully illustrated Christmas cards from the mantel, stare at them and waste an undefined period of time deciding what to do with them. For a few contemplative moments, my mind feels like a rope used in a tug-of-war. On one side, I don’t like the idea of just chucking them into the garbage, since it would elicit feelings of guilt. I’m a bit sentimental about discarding something from the kind and caring person who sent it. On the other hand, whatever am I going to do with them all and will I even remember to read them again? So, typically, they sit in a neat pile on the kitchen countertop. Easier to defer than to decide – and hey, maybe my husband will deal with them! If he chooses to throw them out, I am vindicated. Let all the guilt rest on his dark conscience if he should drop them in the trash. Last year, however, he was derelict in this duty and the cards sat until February, when an accidental beverage spill ruined them, and made the decision for us. But this year I did finally figure out what to do with those cards. An idea occurred as I was preparing a birthday gift for a friend. I was frantically looking for a gift tag in our “gift tags, ribbons, almost-empty cellophane tape rolls, and other wrapping stuff” box in our basement. I simply could not find an appropriate gift tag. My mind scurried and scampered for a solution that didn’t require driving to a store. Maybe I could make a gift tag? Maybe I could make one out of a recycled birthday card or scrapbook paper? Eureka! I was suddenly struck with a notion of what to do with next year’s Christmas cards. A solution hit me at that moment that would both save money on future gift tag purchases and extend the life and value of all those Christmas cards I receive each year. I would no longer deliberate on what to do with all those cards that had hitherto made their annual migration from the fireplace mantel, to our kitchen counter, to the trash bin.

For this project, you will need: • Old Christmas cards • Heavier stock scrapbook paper • Scissors (or precision utility knife with cutting mat) • Glue stick • Hole punch • ¼ inch wide (or smaller) ribbon • White or lighter shade of paper for writing on inside (optional) Begin by cutting a 3” x 6” piece of scrapbook paper. Fold the paper in half, creating a 3” x 3” card. Set aside. Cut out the design you want on the face of the Christmas card (making sure it’s roughly ¼ inch smaller than your 3” x 3” card). Paste that image onto your new folded card, leaving a border around the Christmas card image. Punch a hole through the upper left corner of your folded tag and loop the ribbon through the hole (to tie to gift). If you choose, you can paste a white piece of paper on the inside for writing the recipient’s name.

More ideas for recycling old cards: Don’t limit your tags to the folded style. Christmas tags can be all shapes and sizes with a bit of creativity and an extra pair of inexpensive scrapbook scissors. Create new Christmas cards by cutting and pasting old card imagery onto folded pieces of cardstock. With the vast array of scrapbook paper and embellishments, creativity is unlimited! Use old Christmas cards for miscellaneous holiday arts and crafts for the kids.

By Michelle Sessions DiFranco | Photography by Philip Shippert FM1208 layout.indd 27

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l o c a l

n e w s

Three long time diocesan employees retire After serving for 28 years, Virginia retired from the Diocese of Lansing’s tribunal. At her celebration on Nov. 5, more than 200 people participated in the Mass at St. Mary Bishop Boyea Cathedral. and Virginia DeLuca Arlene Woelfel worked as a secretary for the Diocese of Lansing from Jan. 1985 to May 2008. Arlene worked in several offices at the diocese and retired from the Department of Formation, Deacon and Priestly Life and Ministry office on May 30, 2008. Father Jerry Vincke, department chairman and the department staff celebrated Arlene’s retirement at a dinner in her honor on May 13. Deacon William Sirl worked for the Diocese of Lansing from Oct. 1998 to Nov. 1, 2008. After being ordained a deacon in May of 2000, Deacon Bill became the director of the Office of Deacons. Father Jerry Vincke, department chairman and the department staff celebrated Bill’s retirement at a luncheon in his honor on Oct. 30.

Bishop Boyea’s first prison ministry Mass On Nov. 1, the prison ministry had Mass at the Cotton Facility of the Jackson prisons. It was the first here in the Lansing Diocese for Bishop Boyea. Bishop Boyea said, “… like the migrant camps, the many lay ministers and religious serving in the prison ministry are a real inspiration to me. We must count ourselves as very blessed that we have such dedicated people visiting those in prison.” For more information about the Diocese of Lansing’s prison ministry program, call Tim Metts at 517.342.2495 or e-mail tmetts@dioceseoflansing.org.

PRIEST ASSIGNMENTS Bishop Earl Boyea has made the following priest reassignments:

Pienta

Santhiyagu

•F ather Charles Canoy as temporary administrator of St. Thomas the Apostle, Ann Arbor; • Father Robert Pienta as temporary administrator of Our Lady of Fatima, Michigan Center (effective November 19, 2008); • Father Arokiaselvam Nithiyaselvam, MSFS as parochial vicar of St. Thomas the Apostle, Ann Arbor; • Fr. Arockiyasamy Santhiyagu, MSFS as pastor of St. Michael, Flint. FAITH Magazine

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Diocese of Lansing’s 2008 Youth Jamboree Bob Perron raised an array of emotions among the 900 high school students packed into the Lansing Center on Sun., Nov. 2, for the Diocese of Lansing’s 2008 Youth Jamboree – Fight the Good Fight: Unleash The Faith Hero Within. Teens were wiping tears from their eyes one minute and laughing the next. “His talk about the death of his father really moved my heart,” said one Lansing teen. Another teen laughed out loud when Perron talked about his daughter, who thinks of church kneelers as her pony. Perron has been involved in ministry to young people and adults since 1984. He attended Conception Seminary in Conception, Mo., and earned his bachelor’s degree at Washburn University in Topeka, Kan. He is currently director of Youth Ministry for the Diocese of Des Moines, Iowa. Perron brought the three Catholic super power traits – commitment, community and courage – to life by offering balloonshaped hats to three volunteer participants. “The first super hero hat is commitment,” he said. “Commitment is a tough word … But if we trust God, it can happen.” The second super power, community. “Jesus tells us He is the vine and we are the branches,” said Perron. “We are connected to one another … The best way we do that is every Sunday at Mass.” Joe Rodriguez, an 11th grader from St. James Parish in Mason, volunteered to wear the third super power balloon hat – a hat in the shape of a fish. “The fish is a symbol of Jesus,” said Perron. Rodriguez, while wearing his new hat, said he knows he’s lucky to have his faith and he’s not afraid to show it. “I love to be involved at my church,” he said. “It makes me feel closer to God.” The Jamboree also included skits by teen organizers, lunch, dinner, Mass with Bishop Earl Boyea and the Jack and Patty Armstrong “Friend of Youth” awards, which were presented to Maria Guadalupe Castillo of Cristo Rey Parish in Lansing and Deacon Daniel J. Fairweather of St. John Parish in Davison. It concluded with music by the Youth Renewal Band from Adrian, a dance, concessions and five stations of inflatable entertainment. “I love the Lansing Diocese,” said Perron. “I travel all around the country and this is one of the most organized dioceses. I love the energy of the kids here. They’re ready and prepared to be here – and that makes all the difference.” – Lisa Briggs The Catholic Times

28 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com 11/19/08 3:55:12 PM

p l a c e s

t o

p r a y

Holy Spirit Oratory

eucharistic adoration chapel

he origin of the adoration chapel began in 1993, when Pope John Paul II blessed the outcome of the International Eucharistic Congress in Seville, Spain by stating, “How I should like all the parishes of the world to be open to perpetual adoration of the Eucharist.” People began praying a parish in the Lansing area would start perpetual eucharistic adoration with 24-hour exposition of the Eucharist. In 1996, parishioners from St. Mary Cathedral began approaching clergy and laity in the area to determine the level of interest for adoration. Surveys revealed support from the laity and resulted in Msgr. David Stotenbur’s offer to build a diocesan chapel on the grounds of Immaculate Heart of Mary Church. Bishop Carl Mengeling approved the construction of the chapel and parishioners from 17 churches donated funds and their talent to build the chapel. The Holy Spirit Oratory was dedicated on Oct. 28, 1998. The following year, Bishop Carl Mengeling established the Holy Spirit Oratory as a lay association. The association is made up of all the adorers. There also is a committee that is responsible for the maintenance of the building, financial matters and scheduling of hourly adoration. Father John Byers, the oratory chaplain, oversees all chapel functions. People who have committed themselves to Eucharistic adoration have found it has a made a difference in their life.

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Mike Szostak said it has profoundly affected him. “Almost 10 years ago, I began making an hourly visit each week with Jesus at the oratory. I came with my worries and stresses, my gratefulness and my tiredness. Whatever I was experiencing, Jesus was there for me. The value of putting away the stress and constant noise and activity of modern life to just “be” with the Lord is immeasurable. It is the richest, most peaceful and fastest hour of my week. As I see him before me, I experience his loving gaze and I know he had been waiting for me to spend this intimate time with him. What a joy!

I can tell you that my job, my marriage, my family and my spiritual life has been blessed beyond anything I would have ever expected. I am truly more peaceful and joyful. Trusting the Lord in everything has become much easier. I am able to love more consistently.” A 7-year old girl who comes for an hour every week was asked why she comes. She said, “I like going … because I can see Jesus when I pray and because it is so quiet, I can pray better.” Mother Teresa of Calcutta said “... Nowhere on earth are you more loved, than by Jesus

living and truly present in the most Blessed Sacrament. The time spent with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament is the best time you will spend on earth. Each moment you spend with him will deepen your union with him and make your soul everlastingly more glorious and beautiful in heaven.” More than 300 faithful continue to praise God through their commitment of praying one hour every week and by making occasional unscheduled visits. The chapel is open 24/7, with at least one adorer always in attendance. Everyone is invited to stop in for a prayer visit. The chapel is always open, but for the sake of security, the main door is locked from 5 p.m. to 8 a.m. It can be opened with a simple code on the key pad. We are continually looking for people who will commit one hour each week for prayer. Please take time to come and visit with him any time of day. He is always waiting for you. Anyone interested should call Jack Chan at 517.668.8113. – Michael Szostak

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c o m m u n i t y

things to do: St. Joseph Catholic Church in St. Johns, in celebration of 100 years of service, is sponsoring Late Nite Catechism, Sat., Dec. 6 at 7:30 p.m. The performance will be at Wilson Center Auditorium at 101 W. Cass St. in St. Johns. Tickets may be purchased at the parish office or by calling 517.224.2084 or 517.224.773. The Story of Salvation, a musical, is Dec. 12-13 at 7:30 p.m. at Mt. Zion Catholic Pastoral Center in Flushing. It is presented by Youth to Youth Catholic Evangelization. For information, call 810.639.7175.

St. Mary Church in Williamston is having a Wii Bowling Tournament on Dec. 13. It is open to all Catholic religious education and school students – grades 7-12. For information, contact Adam Janke, director of religious education, 517. 655.2520. Defending the Faith Conference, Dec. 13, Most Holy Trinity Church, Fowler. The presenter is Steve Ray, author of three best-selling Catholic books. Please preregister by calling the parish at 989.593.3174. Bingo players welcome every Sunday at St. Mary Catholic School in Pinckney. Doors open at 1 p.m.; the caller starts at 2 p.m. The final

coverall ends at 6 p.m. The school is located at 10601 Dexter-Pinckney Rd., one mile south of M-36. Everyone is welcome! Wednesday morning Bible study of St. Paul’s Letters to the Romans and Galatians will be offered at St. Thomas Aquinas, East Lansing, 10 a.m.-11:45 a.m. For information or to register, call Carol Ann Wilkinson at 517.351.6841. Beginning Experience of Lansing will offer a spiritual weekend for separated, divorced and widowed persons on Feb. 6-8 at the St. Joseph Retreat Center in Jackson. Pre-registration is required. For information and to register, call Karen,

Transitional diaconate ordination on Nov. 22

T. Gennara

Mark Rutherford was ordained to the transitional diaconate on Nov. 22 at Christ the King Church in Ann Arbor. Born Nov. 26, 1982, in Ypsilanti, he is the son of Brad and Karen Rutherford, parishioners at Christ the King Parish. He attended Ave Maria College and Sacred Heart Major Seminary where he obtained a master’s of divinity. He is scheduled for ordination to the priesthood on June 13, 2009.

517.449.3906 or Ed, 989.224.8668. Liturgy and Music Conference, Sat., Feb. 7, 2009 from 8:30 a.m.-3:30 p.m. at St. John the Baptist Church in Howell. For more information, contact the Diocese of Lansing’s Office of Worship 517.342.2476. Holy Spirit Seminar, Sat., Feb. 21, 2009, 9 a.m.-5 p.m., registration at 8:30 a.m.; at Christ the King Catholic Church, 4000 Ave Maria Dr., Ann Arbor. For more information or to register, call Olga Ortiz at 734.426.5514 or ortiz4519@earthlink.net. Year of St. Paul – 2009 Pilgrimage to Rome tour – March 21-28 with air transit from Detroit, first class hotel in a prime religious and sightseeing area, all breakfasts and four dinners, sight-seeing with motor coach and guides and optional walking tours with Msgr. Raymond Goehring, who has been to Rome seven times. Daily Mass, visit to St. Peter’s, St. Paul’s, catacombs, Assisi, Santa Maria in Trastevere and a papal audience also are included. Registration time is limited. For information and brochure, contact Msgr. Goehring at resurrection1531@sbcglobal.net or (w) 517.484.8870 or (h) 517.482.4741.

St Francis Retreat Center: For information or to register, call 866.669.8321 or visit their Web site at www.stfrancis.ws

of Prayer – Finding our Way to the Manger, to follow the steps of Mary and Joseph to the stable.

10 a.m.-4 p.m., For information, contact Janene at 734.429.7754 or www. prayer-in-motion.com.

Dec. 9, Advent by Firelight, for women, 7p.m.-9 p.m. To register, call 866.669.8321.

Weber Center, 1257 E. Siena Heights Dr., Adrian, 517.266.4000.

Celebrating the Images of Advent and Christmas at Weber Retreat and Conference Center, Adrian, Dec. 13 from 10 a.m.- 4 p.m. Call 517.266.4000.

Dec. 9, 9 a.m.-3 p.m., Advent Day FAITH Magazine

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Advent Waiting: Praying with Body, Mind and Spirit, Sat., Dec. 6,

30 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com

Answer to Bible Quiz (page 11): Egypt 11/19/08 3:55:46 PM

y e a r

o f

S t .

P a u l

St. Paul

apostle to the Gentiles, apostle to us all

Children’s center project a dream come true Sebastian Seromik attended Huron Valley Catholic School in Ypsilanti and taught religious education at St. Mary’s Student Chapel while a student at the University of Michigan. His parents, Ana Luisa and Gary Seromik, are parishioners at Christ the King Church in Ann Arbor. Since May 2007, Sebastian, 24, has been a Peace Corps volunteer in Benin. He is working on a project to build a center for trafficked, abused and orphaned-by-AIDS children. The community has no operational facility to care for the children. The total cost of the project is about $30,000. It is Sebastian’s hope the money will be raised to complete the construction of the orphanage and the facility be open for operation before the end of his service. If you would like to make a donation to this project, you can do so on the Peace Corps’ Web site at www.peacecorps.gov/. Click on Donate Now on the left side of the screen. Next, choose Donate to Volunteer Projects. Then select Africa as the region. Sebastian’s project number is 680-166, listed under Benin, Children’s Home Construction and his name, T. Seromik.

Two new committee assignments for Bishop Boyea Bishop Earl Boyea has two more responsibilities. The Board of the Institute on Religious Life has elected him a board member. This goes along with his being on the Bishops’ Committee for Clergy, Consecrated Life and Vocations. Also, the bishops of Region VI (Ohio and Michigan) have elected him to a three-year term on the administrative board of the USCCB, which involves three meetings a year in Washington, D.C. and another meeting with the Bishops’ Committee on Priorities and Plans.

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Jesus entrusted his apostles with a limitless mission of universality to all nations – including the Gentiles. Since the apostles and most of the first believers in Jesus were converts from Judaism, they faced a difficult choice.

atholics take for granted that being a Catholic simply means someone who belongs to the Catholic Church. Early in our lives, most of us learned that “catholic” is one of the four marks of the church. We also memorized the creed of the Council of Nicea (AD 326) and profess it each Sunday at Mass – I believe in the holy Catholic Church. “Catholic” means universal. The Holy Spirit called St. Paul to make the church “catholic” or universal. And in Jesus’ final words to the apostles, he tells them to “Go make disciples of all nations.” This is called the Great Commission. Jesus entrusted his apostles with a limitless mission of universality to all nations – including the Gentiles. Since the apostles and most of the first believers in Jesus were converts from Judaism, they faced a difficult choice. The struggle to accept the Great Commission was rife with derision, controversy, hostility and even violence. You can read more about it in the Acts of the Apostles and the letters of Peter and Paul. Into all this controversy and struggle, Jesus called St. Paul, who would become known as the apostle to the Gentiles. Jesus called Paul a vessel of election, to carry Christ’s name to the Gentiles. Paul was the perfect choice for this mission. He was a man of three main cultures: a Jew of the Diaspora educated in Jerusalem; a resident of Tarsus who spoke Greek, and a Roman citizen. He understood the Greeks and Romans, their religions and philosophies, and the political systems. With his diverse background, Paul must have had some sense of what Jesus’ call to preach to the Gentiles entailed – it would be a lifelong, heroic mission. The catholic outcome of this ongoing struggle was a decision by the “pillars of the church,” when Paul met with them in Jerusalem. Acts 15 details the decisions of this Council of Jerusalem. They authorized Paul’s mission to the Gentiles and freed Christians from Jewish laws. For the rest of his life, Paul experienced the reality of Jesus’ words, “I will show him how much he will have to suffer for my name.” During his three mission journeys and his final journey to martyrdom in Rome, the struggle continued. He was hounded by enemies from within and without, by controversy, betrayals, riots and suffering. He found joy in the Lord and in the early church communities – in all their universality. He wrote to the Galatians, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ.” (Gal 3:28) Thanks to Paul, the church was Catholic then – and is Catholic now. – Bishop Carl F. Mengeling

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Your Catholic parish invites you. Su Parroquia Catรณlica los invita.

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FAITH Magazine

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32 December 2008 | www.FAITHmag.com 11/19/08 3:56:17 PM