PHOTOS BY NAOMI MITCHELL
17 | THE HUMAN CONNECTION
DESIGN BY ANSLEY CHAMBERS
Never Been Kissed
Some students hold a different perspective on first kisses. By Ansley Chambers Opinion Editor & Copy Editor
“I
didn’t really process it until afterwards. Very quick. Just a quick little peck. I think [it was] the same as everyone else’s first kiss. Mine was just a little later,” a senior girl said. It was Homecoming senior year when she had her very first kiss. “It’s definitely embarrassing to admit I had my first kiss so late,” she said. “It just feels like most people had theirs way before me and it feels weird being the odd one out.” Everywhere we look – the halls at school, TV shows and movies, social media – we are bombarded with the idea of passionate, romantic kisses, especially among teenagers. The idea that it’s abnormal to graduate high school without ever having your first kiss – let alone anything more – has been ingrained into our minds. “People would talk about having their first kiss in like kindergarten and I never ever had that… I did feel a little left out,” the same senior girl said. As children we imagined what it would be like to be 16 and to drive and to have our first kiss in
some super cliche way. And now that we’ve reached that point, it’s a societal expectation. We’ve all had our first kiss, right? Guess again. According to a poll of 57 people on The Patriot’s Instagram, 32% of respondents have yet to experience their first kiss. And according to a study in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, over 14% of college freshmen had never kissed anyone either. The majority of these students were also identified as being less extraverted, having lower self esteem, having more overbearing mothers and drinking less than their peers who had been kissed. They were also more likely to be in their college’s honors program. “I feel like… people assume that I haven’t [had my first kiss],” a junior girl said. Although people never truly know about the experiences of others, they can often make assumptions. “I think people probably just assumed that I hadn’t [had my first kiss] and they were correct,” the senior girl said, “Just because people know I never had a boyfriend.” Because of these assumptions, all of our sources wished to remain anonymous. While Shawnee Mission South is a fairly accepting place, it is still high school and there is still shame carried by students who feel that their stories do not align with the
status quo. And even if they remain fully confident in who they are and what they have or have not done, not everyone else will agree with them. “I want to be anonymous because my sexuality is mine and I don’t owe anybody details,” a sophomore girl said. Discussing a lack of kissing experience seems to be taboo, especially among males. Finding high schoolers that had not been kissed and were willing to talk about it was no easy task, but finding boys was particularly difficult. anything wrong with not being kissed, but it has the potential to be a running joke among friends – a joke that is funnier to some than others or can even be hurtful after hearing it one too many times. Continue reading online:
