December 22: Looking to the Future

Looking to the Future

Students consider the impact of moving on, the challenges of a new environment, and the difficulty of staying put

francis howell central high school vol. 26, issue 2

Every day, we find ourselves making choices, big and small, that will change our days, weeks, months, and possibly even lives. All of these changes, these new challenges and opportunities, they move us forward, to the people that we’re meant to be, toward the places we’re meant to inhabit. For this year’s second issue, we thought it best to address the aspect of life that none of us will ever grow out of: the necessity of moving forward. It’s a tricky concept, leaving the past behind. For some, it’s a time of grief and sadness, and for others, it’s full of excitement and wonder. This often multifaceted experience is exactly why we decided to take this on. Speaking as both one and many voices, from personal and external points of view, the Central Focus addresses on what it means to leave the past behind. We hope you enjoy this issue, and we thank you for reading.

STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS

Photo by Aniya Sparrow

Photo by Samantha Castille

Photo by Kyly Jacobs

Stayin’ Alive

Radigan, Carter help more than 300 seniors take on new CPR training graduation requirement

By Reilly Scobey Print Assignment Editor

Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) is a lifesaving technique that’s useful in many emergencies, in which someone’s breathing or heartbeat has stopped. While CPR is a beneficial skill, if not performed properly you can cause serious damage to the person you are trying to save.

In order to combat these effects, Missouri high schools have started requiring students to have at least 30 minutes of hands-only CPR training before they graduate.

In charge of leading these efforts are PE teachers Malach Radigan and Andrew Carter. During student’s freshman year health class, they receive a week of training on many different aspects of CPR, but many seniors were unable to receive the training because of the COVID-19 epidemic so, with the help of the Guidance Office, the coaches set up 30-minute rotations to guarantee every senior is able to learn the skills.

While setting up the scenario wasn’t too complicated, teaching the students the action steps wasn’t as straightforward. Since this training is required for graduation students didn’t automatically pass, they needed to show Coach Radigan they were able to complete all the steps in a timely manner.

“They had to be able to show us they could do the action steps,” Coach Radigan said. “We demonstrate to them how to check, call, and compress the dummy by walking them through

a scenario and if they are able to complete thos action steps they pass.”

While the training wasn’t as easy as many students thought it would have been, senior Delaynie Brown didn’t think it was too difficult.

“It wasn’t too bad,” Brown said. “I think it would definitely be different in a real situation, but [overall], the whole process wasn’t too difficult.”

While the training wasn’t as in depth as usual, Coach Radigan is proud of how well students were able to grasp the skills.

“I’m sure there could have been a few more fine points we could have focussed on, but just having the experience [was beneficial] for them,” Radigan said.

Coach Radigan wasn’t the only one who found the training beneficial, senior Sam Beardall thinks this real world training will help many students in the future.

“Knowing CPR is important,” Beardall said. “You never really know when you could be put in the position of having to help someone, whether it be someone you know or someone you just met, so being able to stay calm and act efficiently is crucial.”

Even though student training didn’t look the same as in years past, Coach Radigan is confident students are properly educated on a very important lifesaving technique.

“CPR is another resource that could save someone’s life,” Coach Radigan said. “I say all the time, I hope you don’t have to use this, but if you have to use it, you’re trained and know what to do.”

ABOVE: A student kneels on a mat ready to practice chest compressions. During the training, students were shown how to perform CPR, but in order to pass they needed to show either Coach Malach Radigan or Coach Andrew Carter they could complete the action steps. RIGHT: Coach Malach Radigan demonstrates the proper form for compressions. During the seminar Coach Radigan made it abundantly clear the importance of form in CPR. Photos By Aniya Sparrow.

Staying safe when it’s

SLICK

The student parking lot sits full on the morning of Nov. 15, the day of the school year’s first snow. When it comes to driving in cold, wet weather, two of the school’s teachers who are certified to teach Driver’s Education cautioned students to drive more defensively and to give themselves more time to get to their destinations.

By Ian Spencer Staff Reporter

As a midwestern winter approaches, weather that can create some really tricky driving conditions comes along, slick roads, a snow-clouded field of vision and black ice are some considerable cold-weather driving concerns as black ice, a thin glazed coating of ice, while visible on foot, a driver is blind to it most of the time. This can go multiple ways, but it depends on the driver.

The driver could be speeding where black ice happens to be and slide with no control. What happens now depends on the driver, the driver could panic and naturally slam on the brakes or the driver could lightly let off the gas pedal and slide over the ice. Even though some may think it’s clear what to do, crashes like these continue to happen and it’s important that students know how to avoid trouble, like on slick roads. There’s a trick Mr. Andrew Carter, a part-time driver’s ed instructor, recommends to take advantage of your car’s gears to keep a car more stable on slippery roads.

“There’s actually other gears in your car that you could shift into like lower gears. And you know, when you shift into these lower gears, it not only keeps your car moving slower, it gives the tires more traction on slick roads,” Mr. Carter said.

When coming up to spots or just knowing potential weather that you think may give you some icy and snowy roads, switch your car to second or first gear for a safer drive. The only thing is that the driver will have to spend more time on the road then they may usually, when it comes to weather and situations where you’ll need more time. Mr. Michael Bunton, a certified

driver’s ed instructor, recommends what to do.

“In this weather it’s best earlier and takes more time on the road, meaning you’ll need to take time to leave earlier going to school. Definitely, If it’s snowing, or if there’s ice, you need to make sure that you’re watching your speed and surroundings more closely,” Mr. Bunton said.

When winter comes temperatures plunge and air becomes more dense causing overall pressures to drop, subsequently, a driver may see that their tires look a little more flat than they should be. That’s because they likely are, tire pressure can decrease about 1 PSI (pounds per square inch) every 10 degrees the weather drops. In order to avoid complications, Mr. Carter recommends to consistently checking your tire pressure.

“It’s best if you check your tire pressure at least twice a month during this weather, it’s better safe than paying hundreds of dollars for a new set,“ Mr. Carter said.

Tire pressure can be simply checked with a tire pressure gauge by just briefly pressing on the stem of the tire and making sure it reaches the desired PSI of the car. Even though your tire may be full, that’s not the only thing you’ll want to worry about with your tires. Tire tread is an important factor to what keeps a car handling properly and if the tread of a tire is rubbed off can lead to some slippery situations, literally. School Resource Officer Troy Inserra explains tire pressure and tire traction aren’t the only things that should be checked.

“Make sure you check all your fluids. washer fluid, oil, gas, coolant and that there where they need to be,” Officer Inserra said.

Winter weather driving tips

The

Photo by Aniya Sparrow

Living Beside Burnout

By Rachel Blanchard Staff Reporter

For high achieving high school students, like Rabeea Bari, who is enrolled in five advancedplacement classes this semester, stress has become a normal part of day-to-day life, and a part of her. Bari, and students like her, are no strangers to the stress. For Bari and other students in similar situations, it doesn’t come as a surprise that the average high school student has the same stress level as psychiatric patients in the 1950s, according to the American Psychological Association. But when all the extra work from numerous college level courses piles up, and the stress and pressure piles up with it, then these students may run out of fuel, and experience a lack of motivation and interest, inability to focus, lack of creativity, and decreased academic performance, which is commonly referred to as ‘burnout’.

AP and Honors classes are meant to prepare students for their futures, but in order to avoid drowning in the stress, pressure, and responsibility, they are prepared through gifted programs in elementary and middle school. These students can

often look back to their childhood and see that this future was predetermined for them when they were labeled as “gifted” and “bright.” When a child grows up being told that they must be “the perfect student” then what other choice do they have but to shape themselves to fit into the mold made for them? Bari, now a high school junior, still feels the pressure from gifted classes she was enrolled in during elementary school.

“With the gifted program, it’s like, you go the first ten years of your life, or however many years saying, ‘Oh I’m smart, I can do X, Y, and Z,’ and then you get to high school and it’s like, well how else do I measure my own success if that isn’t true now?” said Bari.

At the first sight of something that may be more than average, expectations of friends, family, and teachers, become more than average. For these gifted students, easily achievable expectations are something of the past. As they were growing up, expectations grew with them, but they didn’t grow at the same rate. Expectations soon became something that was completely out of reach, though it was still expected that they

An AP student sleeps at her desk, exhausted from the work load, stress, and pressure as a water bottle and energy drink also sit on the desk. Photo illustration by Andy Waliszewski.

High-achieving students facing exhaustion due to stress, pressure, and workload

would find a way to reach them, as they had in the past. The goals set by others, and themselves, become something they have no choice but to meet. So rather than students pushing themselves farther and reaching higher out of their own ambition, they end up doing so out of fear of letting people down. When this is combined with the pressure that comes with being labeled as “gifted,” you end up with a recipe for burnout.

“I [feel] like if I can survive AP anatomy and AP chem and AP world at once, then I should be able to do [anything], and I think that’s burning me out already,” said Bari, “And, I feel like if I step away from those things, I’ll be hurting myself and other people.”

Whether it is fear of failing themselves or fear of failing others, it is apparent that the leading cause of burnout in students is fear of failure. This fear is what causes students to never learn that setting limits isn’t a sign of failure, but rather a sign of success. When students don’t learn to set limits, they will always push past them, and experience burnout in areas of their lives other than academic, creating a cycle of stress, pressure, and general unhappiness. There is a difference between a challenge and overexertion, and students must learn where the line is, and when it is best not to cross it. For students who are experiencing burnout, setting limits will be a more important lesson than any one you could learn in an AP class. College and career counselor, Michelle Breuer, agrees that it is far more important to learn limits rather than continuously pushing past them when it isn’t necessary.

Students in Advanced Placement classes complete work by hand and on Chromebooks in different classes throughout the school. Photos by Andy Waliszewski.

“It’s not a failure, it’s actually learning your limits, right? And that’s what colleges really want to see, that you can control your limits.”

— Michelle Breuer

How ‘Putnam’ Came to ‘Bee’

By Aly Wittig Staff reporter

It is the time of year that we take a step back and recognize the amazing talent living, breathing, and learning within these walls.

The Spotlight Players have just closed the door on their first production of the year. “The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee,” which was initially set to be performed in the spring of 2020 but unfortunately was halted due to COVID-19, is a musical comedy about the pressure of being in the spelling bee and trying to live up to expectations, whether it’s the characters’ own expectations of themselves, or their family’s expectations of them. So, the big question is: Why would we go back to a play we have already tried to produce?

Mrs. Kimberley Harrison, the current drama director as of two years ago, has revealed that there were multiple choices for this production.

“There were a lot of different options. Generally in the fall, we do a straight play, which is a non musical. And there was a musical I wanted to do, but there was a problem with it. So we were kind of throwing things back and forth. And in the fall, we need to have a smaller cast but we’re really looking for titles that are interest driving through the school, because if we do, you know, say ‘Our Town,’ we’re not going to get a lot of people coming to see it. So our goal right now is to have a large audience.” Harrison said.

For theater lovers, choosing a singular show to put on is like choosing a favorite color: impossible. However, when the drama club suggested doing ‘Putnam, Mrs. Harrison was all for it.

“We had several shows we were interested in, actually, but it was pretty much this show and then something else, so there were only two on the table. And when this show kind of fell through, we decided that probably would be the best choice,” Harrison said.

The choices were incredibly hard to come by. If it weren’t for members of the cast, Mrs. Harrison would’ve been debating the choice of a lifetime, or a semester. For avid lovers of theater, picking a production to replicate can be nearly impossible.

The Spotlight Players act out big moments in the musical at dress rehearsal on Nov. 14. All members of the troupe put in copious amounts of effort for this production, sometimes staying at the school past 9 p.m. Photos by Samantha Castille.

The Spotlight Players present themselves to their audience during the last song. These photos were captured during their tech rehearsal, in which they make sure that all of theirtechnical elemnts work properly. Photo by Samantha Castille.

“One of the seniors on the cast was in the original cast of Putnam County. And we just felt like we needed to firmly close the door on COVID. And have just kind of that closure of, okay, this is what was supposed to happen. They call it the show that never was. And everybody has this fondness for the show that never was, well, let’s give it the light of day. Let’s have it, perform it. Let’s do it. And then just kind of close that door on that era,” Harrison said.

Senior Kaylee Wright is the only remaining member of the cast from 2020 and also choreographed the entire show.

“I feel like I’m in a really unique position this year because I was the only freshman on the cast so I’m the only remaining member from the original cast. It’s a surreal experience. I finally feel like I’m closing a chapter that I didn’t realize I needed to close. And it’s honestly just like closure from COVID. One of the biggest things we lost during the past two-and-ahalf years was being able to actually be a part of the arts and to share the arts with people and it’s finally coming back full swing,” Kaylee says.

Sophomore Abby Myers was the student director of Putnam County and spent a lot of time working with the cast and crew. She had many favorite things about this play, but her favorite in particular has to do with the audience.

“I loved our last song before

intermission with the comfort counselor because I just love the music and it’s when we say goodbye to our last audience volunteer. The cast goes down into the audience and says goodbye to them, and everyone just absolutely loves that.” Myers said.

“The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee” is not only a hilarious and heartwarming performance, it is also the final kick to COVID from the drama department. This is where they slam the door, lock it tight, and move on to a new chapter.

Senior Abby Money stays in character as she clutches a trophy to her chest. This was Abby’s first production with the FHC Spotlight players. Photos by Samantha Castille.

Senior Joey Seevers and Sophomore Connor Becker dance and sing it out on stage during a dress rehearsal for “The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee”. Photos by Samantha Castille.

Senior Aniya Sparrow sings under pink lights. Sparrow has been a member of the Spartan Spotlight Players since her freshman year and has been in six productions. Photo by Samantha Castille.

Facing the Music

Music permeates throughout FHC and creates monumental memories that last a lifetime

By Kailey Pallares Staff Reporter

At age five, junior Tony Valera picked up his first of many instruments, a drum set. Inspired by his father and uncle, he would create his own music without realizing the impact it would soon make on his life. After a long period of convincing, Valera’s parents put him into classical guitar lessons three years later. That was the beginning of the musical journey Valera was going to embark on for years in the future, but he didn’t realize how serious it would soon become for him.

Once Valera reached his freshman year, his mindset in music became much more driven when he joined the Spartan Regiment. His life was soon filled with many connections he had made through music, and he discovered a newfound joy and purpose when it came to playing an instrument.

“Music has given me so many opportunities to express myself, and really let go of the timid shell I’ve kept most of my life,” Valera said. “Last year during marching band, I realized that I could use it as an excuse to break myself out of the nervousness I had before.

“In my sophomore year I really made the effort to go from just playing notes on an instrument, to really performing. I remember I kept telling myself I looked dumb, but kept going because I knew that I needed to learn how to let all of that go,” Valera said. “This year I was approached with performing part of our marching show on a stage. At the time it was terrifying, and I didn’t know if I would be ready for that big of a responsibility.”

As the season went on though, I just went back to that performance mindset that I’ve used for the past couple years, and had the time of my life. Now, I love being able to just have fun while I perform, and communicating that fact to anyone that ends up watching.”

Although Valera grew to become used to performing in front of large crowds, the nerves remain.

“I still get anxiety when I perform. Even after everything I’ve been through performance wise, I still have that part of me that fears that people will look down on me for what I do on that stage,” Valera reflects. “When I get to that point, I just think about the amazing people I’m performing with, and know that as long as the people I actually care about accept what I do, nothing can stop me from putting on my best performance.”

While skill might seem to be the most important factor in playing an instrument, Valera recognizes that having great guides and role models to push him in the right direction, as well as using his time outside of school to practice have helped him accomplish more.

“I work at home to further my skills as a musician with many different instruments, and use those fundamentals to make my own instrumental music and post that music online to further my exposure to colleges in the future,” Valera said.

“My advice for anyone learning an instrument is finding some great mentors, and remembering to not give up. I’ve been so lucky to have some amazing teachers throughout my musical career They taught me to never give up, and believe in myself with what I want to do with my life.”

Music can be a second identity to some, using it to express emotion in ways that can’t be communicated with words. With hard work and commitment to learning to play an instrument, Valera gained more overall than meets the eye.

“Music has had probably the biggest impact out of everything in my life. It’s given me a sense of purpose in my life, and some amazing friends that I’m proud to call my family,” Valera said.

Tony Valera and Everett Scott playing at the fall band concert this past November. The performance feautred the jazz band, as well as wind ensemble.

Photo by Kyly Jacobs

Tony Valera, a junior, plays the electric guitar for the Spartan Regiment’s Pink Out game performance in October. In addition to playing in the marching band, Valera is a member of the Jazz Ensemble and the Wind Ensemble Photo by Aniya Sparrow.

Forward Marching

Moving on and looking to the

By Lorelai Finoch Central Focus Editor-in-Chief

Finding ways to adapt will, more likely than not, turn out to be your saving grace when you’re being pulled along by the dizzying momentum of life’s nonsense. In her first year teaching, Ms. Allison Janis, known by her students as Profe Janis, has been finding herself facing many new challenges and opportunities as she adapts to her new teaching role.

“I think I definitely have unique challenges because I’m still a student … I’m on a provisional certification, which they allow students to get. I mean, I did pass my content exam and I’m fully certified to teach,” Ms. Janis said. “So it’s strange, because I’m in practicum, as well, while I’m teaching. So, technically I’m teaching and student-teaching at the same time.”

Through all of this, Ms. Janis has continued to push forward and managed to find a school/work/life balance through self-care and communication with the people close to her.

“I try to take time to myself when I can, and set boundaries, like with my email and responding to [messages], and then just trying to do basic self care things like journaling and working out and spending time with friends… just taking time to be alone,” Ms. Janis said.

Finding the time for oneself is a well assured way to stay motivated and avoid getting too caught up in the things you can’t control. Senior Cameron Kelly, recently being faced with the looming shadow of college applications, has been finding himself in quite a bit of anticipation for what’s to come.

“There’s a lot of things that are associated with the school or the school district that I’m involved in, so once I’ve left the school district and moved on to college, I’m probably going to have to find new things,” Kelly said. “I’m going to involve myself in band, and that’ll probably take up a lot of time, but I’m probably going to have to actually work to find new friends, and new activities to be involved in because it’s a new slate.”

Fortunately, Kelly has found ways to stay optimistic, not entirely unlike Cooper Schmidt, who himself was recently plunged headlong into unknown territory, has found himself in one such situation not entirely unknown to

the majority of the student body: navigating your freshman year.

“Things have been challenging … and it’s brought on a lot more schoolwork and time made for more homework,” Schmidt said.

Thankfully, Schmidt is all smiles, constantly looking at the way things are already improved and how he could even be better adjusted to his new learning environment thanks to the help of teachers and peers.

“I thought talking to people or just meeting people would be super difficult, but it’s actually really easy. All the kids here are really nice,” Schmidt said.

Schmidt’s optimism is something many would take for granted, but to uphold such a lightness in the face of the unfamiliar is a gift, and Kelly, reflecting on his final season in FHC’s marching band, found himself wishing he’d remembered the words of advice that encouraged a similar awareness and the appreciation to be gained from being present.

“The really good [piece of advice] my band director gave at the beginning of the season was to cherish every single moment. And I did my best too, but at times it was kind of like, oh, this is just another band season or this is just another year in scouts,” Kelly said. “It wasn’t until that one moment, and then I kind of looked back on it all, and I was like, ‘Oh…this is my last season. I gotta take it in.’”

Smiling wide at her classroom full of students, Spanish teacher Alison Janis begins class. Her first year on the job has provided plenty of difficulties, but that hasn’t stopped her from relishing in her dream of teaching come true.

Freshman Cooper Schmidt enjoys his second period band class. Schmidt has found a number of new friends through band, somthing that has acted as a great comfort during the beginning of his freshman year. Photo by Makenzie Solis

Photo by Magi Temelkova

College

By Sarah Schmidt Web Assignments Editor

College application season is always a special time for seniors. Whether special is good or bad, seniors try to find the balance between college essays, fall sports, and everyday homework. Overachieving seniors, those characterized by their academic efforts, are especially known to focus heavily on this time of year. Society puts a lot of emphasis on college, but sometimes the pressures and expectations cause students to spend the first few months on edge about college.

Seniors past and present know all too well how applications affect the final year. Stressful “free time,” booked weekends, and financial aid paperwork are all stressors that seniors face due to college applications.

Senior Zain Bari has found the application process more tedious than anything, spending most of his time writing essays.

“[Applications] were not stressful, but it’s a lot of work. One of my colleges wanted six essays and I had to miss Quiz Bowl because I really had to get it done. I’m sure later on when I’m done applying, it’ll be fine though,” Bari said.

Senior Zain Bari intently focuses on his assignment in AP Psychology. After high school, Bari is hoping to persue a career in the medical field, so doing well in his science classes — he’s enrolled in three this semester — is crucial. Photo By Kyly Jacobs.

Seniors and teachers alike feel the heat of college application season

The one worry for many seniors, including Bari, has been the diversity colleges have started to increasingly care about.

“I feel like I’m not unique enough because I’m super into academics. I’m not really diverse, I don’t do things like band or sports. On paper, I’m the basic nerd,” Bari said, “I’ve accepted it though. It’s senior year so what would I do, join a club for two minutes and then graduate?”

Senior Charlie Rosser related to Bari with her experience, noting that most of her stress came from financial aid paperwork rather than the application itself. She’s also found the anticipation of results to be daunting as both rejection and acceptance letters are sent out.

“It’s just so disheartening to think that I’m putting so much time and effort into something that I might not get anything out of,” Rosser said.

Thankfully, she’s found that it hasn’t dampened her senior year and will hopefully get even better after applications are over.

“[Applications] have definitely made this year a little less fun but I’m still enjoying senior year. This has been my favorite of high school by far,” Rosser said.

AP Stats teacher Emily Harris has seen seniors tense up over college as they ask her for college recommendations but says the real falloff will be the second semester when the honeymoon phase has ended.

“I do think right now is when they’re most stressed, but it’s not impacting academic performance. I think once they make a decision that’s when their academic performance slows,” Mrs. Harris said.

Guidance Counselor Kristopher Miller had similar things to say. He’s found that after Covid-19, students are feeling less stressed about the college season.

“In the age of Covid, schools have become less restrictive. Past students were always trying to improve their score a little bit more, and now that some schools have moved to test-optional that’s made it a little easier,” Miller said.

Covid has also made students a bit more reliant on themselves. After two years of figuring things out individually, students tend to try and figure things out alone rather than “bother” an adult.

Regardless, individuality has yet to destroy societal expectations as academic driven students are expected to attend Ivy League schools. Senior Platinum Liang has had some driving forces behind his choice of schools.

“My parents don’t care what college I choose in the end but they still want me to try applying to a few competitive ones. On top of that, everyone expects me to go to some ivy league school,” Liang said.

Sometimes students forget that everyone is still a person whether first or last in their class, and placing worth based solely on grades is harmful to both ends of the spectrum. High academics don’t equal Ivy League and poor academics don’t equal community college, but people tend to forget that in the rush that is the college craze.

“People just think ‘Oh, we’re smart,’ but I feel like something that plays more of an influence is the work we put in. I put so much effort into [school] and I don’t think a lot of people realize that,” Liang said.

Senior Charlie Rosser smiles in AP English Literature and Composition, enjoying the class conversation. As a senior, Rosser has enjoyed the freedom that comes with taking classes you enjoy rather than those that are required.

Photo By Kyly Jacobs

By Emily Sirtak Web Editor-In-Chief

The signs of leaving were all around. Their stacks of packed boxes, college letters, checklists and final plans with friends all lined up. Observing from the background feels powerless as they pack up the car and speed off to the new chapter of their life, and it can’t help feeling like

Moving on

you’ve been left in the dust.

While college preparation is a stressful time for students entering, nobody considers the siblings dealing with the drastic changes at home without the support of their older sibling, no matter how close they were before the transition.

Junior Lex Hill had their sister, Lorelei Hill move away to Pennsylvania Western University, almost 11

hours away in California, this fall.

“I miss her so much and she’s always really busy with class so I never even get to FaceTime her, which is really sad,” Lex said. “I only get to talk to her about once a week if that and it was a really hard transition to go from seeing her every day to only seeing her over call every once in a while.”

Even before the transition, Lex felt the gradual fading of their sister’s presence in the household. Hill describes the transition of her sister leaving the house for college.

“She prepared us pretty well by working three jobs, being involved in theater and a ton of other clubs and activities,” Lex said. “Even though we were close, it felt like she was gone before she even left.”

Not only do younger siblings have to adjust to the loss of their sibling, they also have to adjust to the new family dynamic at home. Lex describes the changes in their parents as they transitioned into a house with one less kid.

“My mom’s been really clingy since she’s such an affectionate person and she lost one of her kids to give affection to,” Lex said. “My dad’s pretty much the same, but he’s annoyed that she won’t be able to visit very often.”

Though the dynamic of their relationship has

Those left behind struggle after older siblings leave home

Illustration by Emily Sirtak

shifted, Lorelei Hill also conveys the same sadness she feels about not being able to see her sibling.

“It’s only been three months and I feel like we are still in the transition; I don’t think for either of us it has really set in that we probably won’t ever live together again,” Lorelei said.

Lorelei cherishes every call with Lex between balancing classes, jobs and living in a new state. Through the months, their communication has become a big priority between the both of them.

“Lex always calls and shows me our dog Hazel because they know that I miss my little puppy,” Lorelei said. “I get lots of updates on these calls, Lex’s life has changed so much and these facetimes have become really important to me.”

Though the distance between siblings can have a huge impact on household life and family dynamics, the move to college can be a difficult transition, no matter how far away the sibling moved.

Senior Dominic Debro’s brother, Devin Debro, went to study at Lindenwood in the fall of 2021 and still lives at the house, yet the closeness of the brothers has shifted. Debro describes the natural lack of communication that simply going to separate schools has had on their relationship.

“My brother and I used to hang out all the time

and it definitely was disappointing not hanging out as much anymore,” Debro said. “Even though he still lives with us, it’s hard to find time, but I realize that it has to be like that because he’s growing up.”

The two years Debro has had to get used to the transition has made him realize the importance of distance and moving past the same family dynamics of before. Debro now accepts the fact that he’s

not as close with his brother and understands the importance of moving on.

“Over time I’ve realized that you have to let go. Everyone has their own path and you can’t change that,” Debro said. “They will always be your sibling, they’ll still think about you but at the end of the day, they’re moving on and it’s important to let go and support their new path of life.”

“It’s only been three months and I feel like we are still in the transition; I don’t think for either of us it has really set in that we probably won’t ever live together again.”

Lorelei Hill, 2022 graduate

Temporary Success

By Reilly Scobey Print Assignments Editor

We all have a routine, something we have grown accustomed to doing. Whether it be the time we work, doing homework, or attending school, we all have things we need to get done, but for senior Maiya Boian her routine has given her a lot of stability. During the school week, she spends the first half of her day in the CAPS program where she is able to transport herself into her future and fully immerse herself into the life of a doctor which she plans to become after high school.

After CAPS, she attends her regular classes before heading off to her club meeting for the evening. Boian has been a part of many organizations at school, but currently, she is a leader of FCA, secretary of Epsilon Beta, a member of NHS and NAHS, and she is on the Scholar Quiz Bowl team. When these clubs aren’t taking up Boian’s time, she finds herself busy with homework, studying, applying for scholarships, and prepping for the ACT.

With such a jam-packed routine it is a miracle Boian is able to get anything done. While she is able to manage everything, she finds it hard to squeeze everything into her routine.

“I love all the activities I’m in, but I have a meeting or something almost every day after school, which means my homework gets pushed back,” Boian said. “So I can’t do much outside of school on weekdays.”

Being a part of so many things doesn’t only impact Boian’s time for school work, it impacts her ability to hang out with friends. With a lack of availability during the week, Boain finds it hard to make time for friends.

“It’s frustrating sometimes because I really want to go do something, but then I remember I have homework or a project to be working on,” Boian said. “Basically, I need to know really far in advance [in order] to go to social activities, so I can plan [schoolwork] around it.”

Boian isn’t the only one who finds it difficult to manage everything, junior Katelyn Guth believes her extracurriculars give her a chance to be social.

“Activities definitely impact the time available for social events, but they are also opportunities for socializing themselves. No, I can’t really go to Chick-fil-A with my friends after school, but I can spend two hours with them at practice,” Guth said. “It’s not really sacrificing social time, just changing the way it looks.”

Outside of long-term effects to social life, pressures from parents and teachers to achieve the improbable set an unreachable precedent for what students are able to achieve academically and otherwise. Boain feels the pressure more than anyone, as a go-getter she constantly feels like she needs to one up herself in order to succeed.

“Society expects teenagers to have it all together, be involved, and get

good grades because these are ‘the best times of our lives’ or something, but in reality, it can be overwhelming when you realize all society expects from you,” Boain said.

Boian isn’t the only one who thinks society’s ever-changing expectations deter students, senior Vann Hettich finds it difficult to meet expectations.

“Everyone is always changing their views [based on] what’s popular,” Hettich said. “So it’s tough to be ‘successful’ because you want to fit in with [these views].”

While society’s expectations have caused many challenges, Guth believes these expectations can be many’s favorite parts of high school.

“I think an argument can be made that doing well on a test or maintaining a 4.0 are the fun aspects of high school. It’s not the same kind of fun as going to a football game, but it’s always fun to do well,” Guth said.

While many would argue with Guth’s claims, she believes the ‘fun aspects’ of high school are different for everyone.

“No one ‘trades in’ the fun aspects of high school by maintaining a higher GPA, the ‘fun aspects of high school’ are just defined differently by different types of people,” Guth said.

Senior Maiya Boian posing for a photo with her fellow CAPS nursing students. This year Boain has discovered a new found love for her future career with the help of the CAPS program. Photo courtesy of Maiya Boian

With ever-growing expectations, students struggle to find a balance

By Kailey Pallares Staff Reporter

Senior Lilly Williams awakes to her alarm blaring beside her. As she begins her morning, she feels her body aching from last night’s volleyball practice. Williams thinks about the day ahead of her. School, volleyball practice, study, and repeat. The cycle continues, and one question sits in the back of her mind. Is my mental health worth risking for success on the court?

Sports burnout, also known as overworking syndrome, is a product of the constant physical and mental stress that comes with the commitment of playing a sport. Whether it be from your peers, coaches, or parents, the weight can feel overpowering and diminish the love for an athlete’s activity. Many players start at the youth level and continue to play throughout high school and college levels, but slowly lose the love later on. While being taught to always give their all, a need for perfectionism can develop into their mindset. As these players are expected to keep up with their sport, it can also be easy for a players mental health to be taxed by the constant pressure.

Williams, a former volleyball player, experienced this strenuous cycle during her sophomore year of high school. After playing for eight years, the exhaustion caught up to her when it became harder to balance school, sports, and keeping enough time for her own mental health.

“My burnout was such a mentally draining time period for me. I was stuck in this middle ground of knowing that my sport is what brings me happiness, but it’s also the thing that’s bringing me the most sadness. I’d have breakdowns or panic attacks at practice, and

Blowing

Out the Flame

Student-athletes struggle with fading interest in their pastimes

I knew that playing wasn’t worth what it was causing me to feel. I constantly thought that if I wasn’t training or working out, that I was being lazy and wasting my time,” Williams said.

As she continued to play through her seasons, it became harder for her to play through it without proper breaks or time off from volleyball.

“People don’t realize that volleyball is a year round commitment. June through November is high school volleyball season, and the end of November through May is club volleyball season. I had no time for a job, and I started failing classes because I put my sport in front of school and my own mental health. I eventually stopped doing my work and started cutting school, because I was constantly so tired from getting home at 10:45 from practices every night,” Williams said.

Junior Kylee Gundaker has been playing soccer as a goalkeeper for 12 years, pushing through each season regardless of her injuries or tiredness. With high expectations being put on her each game and practice, the weight can start to feel overbearing. “Sports burnout can all depend on the environment of people you are surrounded with. Whether it’s you being hard on yourself, or others putting a certain amount of pressure on you, you lose love for what you do,” Gundaker said. “Talking to your coaches and teammates just so you can relieve that stress can help you start to feel better about yourself and your sport. Nobody is going to be perfect at their sport, and not everyone is going to get to the higher level everyone expects out of you.”

Coach Patrick Reed has been a teacher for 23 years and the girls tennis coach for 13 years. As a coach, he has experienced and seen his

own athletes go through a burnout, and offers some insight for those who are struggling.

“I think a lot of it comes down to their own expectations and the expectations placed upon them by others, which could be a coach, but it could also be a parent or another family member. I think that plays a big role in the creation of your own expectations, whether or not there were outside extrinsic or inside intrinsic forces,” Coach Reed said. “I think what can really prevent burnout is to take breaks from that sport. If one player only plays basketball for 365 days a year, that usually leads into that burnout phase. It also doesn’t usually translate super well since it wears the body down because you’re using the exact same parts of the body over and over and over.”

Without time off from an athlete’s sport, they can start feeling worn out and might exert less effort in the future.

“That’s why we’d love multi-sport athletes so they can get breaks from one sport at a time.. You know, I did two different sports. One was very team focused, and one was very individual focused, and that kind of helped me scratch both itches. But even if you’re just a one sport athlete, you need to get away from the sport for a while,” Coach Reed said.

As important it is to prioritize school and your sport, try to find a balance to keep your body and mind healthy. Communicate how you are feeling to your family, coaches and peers for ways on how you can relieve some of this stress and burnout.

“You always need to remind yourself, not just physically take a break, but mentally take a break because you never want the pressure of the sport to ever exceed the pleasure that you get from it,” Coach Reed said.

Illustration Kailey Pallares

The Big Commitment

College-bound athletes have a lot to consider in their recruitment

By Nolan Haberstroh Staff reporter

Senior Kara Middleton began playing lacrosse in her freshman year, and despite an injury in her second season, she has remained focused on her sport and on playing in college, committing to Aurora University earlier this year. When deciding, Middleton’s process was to start with a lot of choices, and slowly narrow them down based on her preferences, while not getting too hung up on any one school.

Going into senior year, students have a monumental choice to make: What comes next? For many, the answer is college, but that just offers the even more difficult decision of where to go. Applications, visits, and scholarship offers take a lot of time and energy to go through, and it can be a stressful process. Some student athletes decide it’s better to get this process over with sooner rather than later, by committing to a college while still in high school.

“It was an easy choice towards the end. I felt so worried about being seen by college coaches that I just took everyone I got. I had like 20 on my list at one point, but I ended up narrowing that whole list down to three colleges. I think that everybody should have a big list of colleges, because you might have this one college on your list that’s your number one pick, but you might go there and hate it,” Middleton said.

Some students, on the other hand, prioritize sticking to their instincts when it comes to their future. Senior David Cross is an athlete who comes from a family of athletes. His father

wrestled at Mizzou, a path that he intends to follow. Wanting to secure a spot on the team early, Cross committed to Mizzou in December 2021.

“If you know what you want to do, then I mean, why wait?” Cross said. “It’s not a bad thing to make sure you explore all your options first, but you don’t want to talk yourself out of doing what you really want to do.”

Despite his decision to commit so early, Cross still understands the gravity of this process. He stressed the importance of taking in your options, and cautioned against going for just any offer a coach gives you.

“Coaches will try to get you to commit early, and they’ll kind of put pressure on you to do it. But as long as you stay confident and calm, you won’t bend to the pressure.” Cross said.

Other athletes share these worries. Senior Caleb Cheatham has played baseball all his life, and recently committed for the sport at McKendree University. He made this choice after considering his options for his first 3 years of high school, and is worried about students making their final decision before they have the

opportunity to do the same.

“I would definitely not suggest committing too early, like if you’re a freshman and you’re committed to a college already. A lot of those colleges won’t know what your potential could be once you’re a senior. A lot of times, they end up pulling their scholarship offer, and you don’t know what you can do because you closed off all your opportunities so early on.”

Even with these concerns being raised, the general consensus among these athletes is that committing took a significant weight off their shoulders.

“I didn’t think that I’d be committed so early. I thought that I would have been like everybody else and just waited until spring to decide what college I wanted to go to. But I think choosing this early really helped with my stress.” Middleton said.

ABOVE: Senior Kara Middleton studies her notes in science class. She committed to Aurora University earlier in the year. Photo by Aniya Sparrow.

LEFT: Senior Caleb Cheatham focuses on his work in math class. He committed to McKendree University earlier this year. Photo by Aniya Sparrow.

Senior David Cross sits in class wearing one of his Mizzou hoodies. He committed to Mizzou in December of last year. Photo by Aniya Sparrow.

Hidden Games

Less popular sports deserving of more attention

By Amber Davis Staff Reporter

Stories of winning touchdowns in football games and rather crazy shots in basketball are constantly being seen and talked about by the general community. But it is not often that outstanding performances in tennis matches or record times beaten in swim & dive are mentioned in conversations.

Some sports offered to students at FHC do not get the attention it deserves — leaving their sometimes unprecedented achievements in the dark. One of those sports is swim and dive. Coach Robin Hussey believes a few factors contribute to the unpopularity of some teams.

“I think it would be more popular if there was a pool at school, and practice wasn’t so late at night,” Hussey said.

The team practices about four to five times every week, typically from 8-10 p.m. Although this is a sacrifice when it comes to time management and a cut into some of their free time, there is one thing that she wants students who are on the fence or considering joining to know.

“Participating in this sport gives you a skill for life and a sport you can continue for the rest of your life,” Coach Hussey said. “It is the best overall exercise for your health.”

According to Coach Jeremy Rohrbach, tennis requires a high level of mental strength. Coach Rohrbach makes this point to his teams.

“You cannot succeed in this sport if you are not mentally strong,” Coach Rohrbach said. “The dynamic of playing individuality in a team sport is something that does not happen in many

other sports.”

One aspect of a sport is taking personal responsibility while playing on the team. When it comes to tennis, individuality is oftentimes an important part of success within the game.

“You are a part of a team but also have times when you are playing as an individual,” Coach Rohrbach said. “Tennis is one of the only sports that this happens. You can win your match and the team can still lose; it can be a grind mentally.”

Bowling is more than likely one of the least known sports offered to students. Senior Daniella Bohnenstiehl, a member of the team, suspects that this is due to the sport simply not getting the same promotion that many other sports get.

“I feel like the school could advertise it

more,” Bohnenstiehl said. “It doesn’t get a lot of recognition by [the school] like football or baseball does.”

Coach Rohrbach agrees there is a subset of sports that do not get advertised as much compared to other sports.

“It never gets the publicity that other sports do,” Rohrbach said. “It does not bring in any money for the school.”

Bohnenstiehl adds that a person’s mindset of what does (or doesn’t) qualify as a sport can have a large impact on promotion of the sport, attracting spectators, and recruiting members onto the team.

“When people think of sports, they think of more competitiveness like football and baseball,” Bohnenstiehl said. “They don’t really typically think about bowling because people don’t really think of it as much of a competitive sport as the other, more physical ones.”

Bowling does, however, have competitiveness to it. In fact, the team has participated in a number of tournaments and games against other teams in the area, including the Metro Tournament at Imperial Bowl on November 6. Although not all sports involve being tremendously physical, they do have the same goals in mind: have fun, get stronger, and win over any opponent they face.

“When we grow up, we watch the ‘big four’ sports on TV and that’s part of the reason they are the most participated in,” Coach Rohrbach said. “[But] I do want to say that our AD, Mr. Scott Harris, does a great job of supporting [sports] at FHC.”

Senior Brenden Czigler focuses hard on his swimming, hoping to beat his personal goals. The swim meet on October 17th was a great opportunity for him to show off the talent he has. Photo by Brock Slinkard

Sophomore Riley Winkler’s level of concentration is high as he bowls, hoping for a strike. The anticipation in the Imperial Bowl was great during their November 6th tournament. Photo courtesy of FHC Bowling

Three young artists share how they work through creative blocks The Barrier

By Moth Payne Staff Reporter

Bre king

The pencil scratches against the assignment, cramming boring words into the young artist’s mind. This lecture is nothing but repetitive and never ending - the words droning on and on, as if it could never end. When will this just be over ... Ding. Ding. Ding. ding. Ding. Ding. Ideas flow into his head, the ringing bell announcing their existence, sort of like magic.- The pencil no longer scratches, but flows, inventing illustrations with inspiration, tearing down the barrier that blocked those ideas. Sophomore Toby Kelly finds his mind exploring ideas, but he can’t achieve his goal without the right motivation.

“It’s the worst, because I’ll be sitting there and wanting to draw, but I can’t think of anything,” Kelly said. “I’ll try to go on Pinterest, to see if there’s anything there, but sometimes I don’t know what to do.”

Kelly describes the experience of dealing with art blocks. An art block is the period of time, whether it be short or long, when an artist has no ideas for artwork. For Kelly, he’ll try to find inspiration even when nothing comes to mind, which causes him to lose the motivation in the first place. Since art blocks work differently for artists, he’ll deal with an art block his own way.

“I’ll give myself a break if I can’t think of anything,” Kelly said. “And after that break is over, there’s those sparks that are what I need to get me out of it.”

With the sparks of inspiration flickering and clicking in Kelly’s mind, they take his hand and lead him out of the empty void of nothing, instead leading him to where inspiration is fluid, painting his thoughts. Multiple drawing ideas grow from trees, but a certain piece is Kelly’s favorite.

Artists at FHC

Scan this QR code to continue reading the story to see the view of two other artists that attend FHC, and a teacher’s hindsight!

“I’ve come up with this idea of space cadets, and I’ve made a whole cast of characters,” Kelly said. “I’m proud of that piece because it shows that I’ve created this whole world, I made them cute uniforms with bubbly shoes, and it’s mine.”

An Illustration of Kelly’s space cadet ocs, Dust and Crater. This is Kelly’s favorite piece, and rightfully deserved with how cute the designs are. Illustration by Toby Kelly.

Sophomore Toby Kelly smiles fondly at the conversation happening in his Pre-Ap ELA class. Kelly was talking with his pod members about a test they had taken, rewarding himself with a good conversation. Photo by Raina Straughter.

Taught With Thought

Unique teaching styles make time in class more enjoyable for students

By Amber Davis Staff Reporter

Class begins with an entertaining story that comes straight out of the life of English Language Arts teacher Christina Lentz. Whether it is a dream, or a real life scene of her day, the students laugh with her and provide commentary on how amusing, yet crazy, she is. Many students consider a class “enjoyable” when the agenda does not always consist of sitting at a desk for an hour each day, only listening to lectures and taking tests.

Although there are a select number of classes where such a routine is in place, many teachers have been working to add some fun into their lesson plans to increase engagement in their students. Mrs. Lentz is one teacher with the belief that it is important to incorporate the interests of students into lessons to keep them motivated in class.

“It’s no secret that students love social media, videos, and taking pictures, so we recently tried to do a spinoff of ‘Be Real’ where we had kids answer questions and then post real time reactions to the text,” Mrs. Lentz said. “I realize every day cannot be fun and games, but I certainly try to make my class one where kids enjoy coming — even if they hate the content.”

While teachers like Mrs. Lentz prefer to have their classes participate in activities (mostly) pertaining to the topic the students are learning, other teachers, like math teacher Brittany Williams, like to stray outside of that “relate to the subject” category of activities.

“I do like a lot of icebreakers and stuff with [the Algebra I students] because they switch groups so often,” Mrs. Williams said. “Today, for instance, I made them pretend they were going to a picnic and they had to go around and say what they were bringing to the picnic, but it had to be alphabetical.”

Coach and PE teacher Mike Bunton also implements class-bonding exercises into his teaching to give his students a chance to relax and have fun getting to know each other.

“We do restorative circles every Wednesday in my classroom,” Mr. Bunton said. “The reason why I love that is because you get to learn more about each other, and I’m really big on classroom community.”

Mr. Bunton teaches a number of classes, including Driver’s Ed, freshman PE, and Advanced Weight Training. He has had many ideas for ways to get his Driver’s Ed students specifically, moving while still learning different concepts.

“We do a lot of moving around activities,” Mr. Bunton said. “We go outside, and we can learn visually whether it’s looking at colors of curbs, looking at tires, or looking at certain things that we can use to try to help us learn the content better.”

“I want my students to understand the importance of reading, writing, and thinking outside of the mandatory assignments given, and I want them to grow their passion for the written and spoken word.” Mrs. Lentz said. “More importantly, I want my kids to leave my room feeling loved,

validated, seen, heard, accepted, and proud of exactly who they are.”

In 2020, the COVID-19 pandemic caused a series of changes for teachers, including how they went about their day and how they taught. Mrs. Williams believes the bumpy road known as COVID-19 changed her teaching and gave her the ability to express herself more in a way that she did not before.

“I was definitely very rigid,” Mrs. Williams said. “I would have taught bell-to-bell every day and there’s no way we would have as many review days as we have.”

Mrs. Williams made it a priority of sorts to give her students review days when they were necessary so they could come to her with questions when they needed to, and the other students could work independently on whatever they needed to get done.

“Kids were missing from here for certain reasons,” Mr. Bunton said. “So I was very open and understanding about that. We all have stuff we deal with, so my teaching styles have changed in a way because of two years ago when COVID started.”

Even if the pandemic had not hit so hard, there was still an importance of showing that love and empathy not only to other staff members, but also to students.

“I try my best to be real, relatable, and empathetic all while having high expectations,” Mrs. Lentz said. “I like to make jokes, as I appreciate playful banter. I am constantly trying to put myself in their shoes because I know seven hours of school can be rough.”

Dressed in Hawaiian attire, Mrs. Christina Lentz, smiles as she interacts with her class. One of her favorite aspects of being a teacher is being able to show students how fun class can be. Photo by Brock Slinkard.

“Having a teacher with a fun teaching style means that they care and are willing to try and make the learning environment fun and engaging for everyone, so the class is excited to learn and ready for what’s to come.”

— Lillie Burns, junior

Visible Pride

An illustration of my younger self reacting to proper representation in “The Owl House.” Representation is important because it helps with self-acceptance down the road. illustration by Moth Payne.

By Moth Payne Staff Reporter

June 22nd, 1955: Walt Disney published his first romance movie, “Lady and the Tramp.” “Lady and the Tramp” is still adored by many today, and it is one of Disney’s top grossing movies at $187 million when it came out in theaters. Ever since then, Disney has come out with multiple romance movies, most of them following the lead prince and princess who inevitably saves her in the end. Despite the common trope of the princess and the prince, or the princess and the lowlife, you name it– people of our society have consumed this media for multiple years, and continue to do so once another typical movie comes out.

Disney productions has produced amazing movies, amazing shows, and many things fans adore, and it is amazing how much this company has grown, however, you might be wondering–“What are you talking about? That doesn’t suit the title whatsoever.”

The reason as to why I mention Disney’s history and growth as a company is because it has been

years ever since the first Disney movie had come out, and it’s always the same cisgender, hetero relationship trope. Disney has come out with pride merch, and LGBTQ+ characters, but they’re either stereotypical, or they’re background characters. That changed whenever Dana Terrace, the creator of “The Owl House’’, premiered the show on Disney Channel on Jan. 10, 2020.

When I watched the show for the first time in the summer of 2021, Dana Terrace introduced Raine, a non-binary supporting character. I expected them to be some basic cisgender man, where their only role is to be the love interest for Eda, another main character in the show.

That wasn’t the case whatsoever, because whenever they were first introduced, the characters around them referred to them with they/them pronouns, no one set them aside with a specific gender group, and they were overall themselves–getting the point across that they were a non-binary character.

As a young non-binary kid, seeing Raine, a positive representation of being non-binary, it made

Representation holds so much power over a young children accepting who they are

An illustration of myself being chained to the bed with ‘thoughts’ about myself surrounding my body. With lack of representation, this illustration shows that accepting myself is a rocky road, but eventually I’ll be okay and recognize what I am. Illustration by Moth Payne.

me feel seen. All of my life, I always had that sinking feeling that I wasn’t myself in my own body. Like I was trapped inside a dog’s cage, waiting to get out, and waiting to see that representation that made me want to accept myself. So, when I first came out as non-binary to friends, I felt very insecure and uncertain about it, not sure if I was making the right decision of fully accepting myself, or if I was just some child wanting to identify with something different due to only being 10 years old.

Raine changed that. It’s crazy that a fictional character could impact someone in real life, but they can. It made me feel loved and not insane that I was non-binary, and that I was completely valid for how I identified. I wasn’t just a kid that was being delusional, or a kid that was lying to themselves. I was important, and I was seen. It is so important to represent our kids, because over time, they will feel like their identity is a lie because of the amount of straight, cis characters in our media.

Although there are many attempts at making representation in media, sometimes they don’t hit the mark. The remake of “She-Ra and the Princesses of Power” is an amazing example of horrible representation in the media. “She-Ra and the Princesses of Power” came out on Nov. 13, 2018 on Netflix, and it had such high expectations. The show was seen as a redemption of what “Voltron,’, a show that was set up for failure whenever talking about representation, and what it could’ve been. So of course, everyone including myself was excited. “Voltron” had constantly committed queerbaiting, harmful representations of trans people, and even a hint of racism and stereotypes among chubby people as well.

“She-Ra and the Princesses of Power” had multiple body types, sexualities, ethnicities, and races represented. It seemed like it was the most perfect show, like if you watched it, you would immediately feel accepted and valid. But, it was the opposite.

Double Trouble is a shapeshifter mercenary and a spy for the main

villain, the Horde. Double Trouble is one of the first openly non-binary characters in media, but is a lizard-like character when talking about appearance. This is a very harmful stereotype for non-binary people, which is being represented as other-wordly and an alien, as it’s following a strict androgynous aesthetic of not even being human.

Seeing this crushed me, because I knew it wasn’t right when I first watched it in my living room. What hurt the most, though, was the fact that the rest of my siblings had no problem with it, making me realize that I was the only one that understood the importance of how harmful that stereotype was. Double Trouble was only a character for them, but a huge obstacle in the way of accepting myself.

This is why representation is important. I discovered that I wasn’t cis when I was 10 years old, and only recently have felt like it was okay for me being non-binary. I kept punishing myself and getting onto myself like I was my own parent for being non-binary, shaming myself for being who I am, and no child should have to deal with feeling entangled in a bunch of ropes, just waiting to be cut free. We shouldn’t have to be crying tears of joy anytime we are represented properly, just because it is that rare to see.

With representation properly represented in shows like “The Owl House,” it helps out so much with accepting myself. Back then, I had so much trouble even thinking about the fact that I was non-binary, or coming to terms with it and expressing myself as who I truly am. But now, I finally feel seen and discovered by just one show and one character. That’s why being represented in the media is so important, because it makes me feel like myself, and it makes me want to cry tears of joy because there’s someone out there that understands that I’m me. It makes me feel like I’m being hugged by someone I have never met in my whole life, telling me that it’s going to be okay. That I’m not a monster, and that I’m human.

An Illustration of me holding a pride flag to myself, and having it wrapped around my former self. This illustration focuses on the fact that my past self had to deal with being underrepresented, or horribly represented. Even though it isn’t much, the fact that I have one character today that makes me feel accepted is a lot. Illustration by Moth Payne.

Honing In

What does it mean to find your place?

By Lorelai Finoch Central Focus Editor-in-Chief

As we reach the second quarter of the year, the majority of college applications have started rolling out, and with them arises my entirely contradictory but ever-constant fear of planning for the future. The idea of moving on from here, from this monotonous day-to-day has always been an appealing daydream, one that’s pushed me to look past the immediate future and consider the many places I want to go. However, in reality, this examination of how my life could be has always been so unattainable. So colossal. So, simply put, scary.

To combat this, making fairly well-structured plans has been the key to my typically elusive motivation for years, as the fear of imminent deadlines and immovable appointments is all that really keeps me going when I’m running strictly on fumes, as I know is largely the case for many of my peers (a problem that none of us outwardly address, that only grows more outrageous). But laying the foundation for the next four years of my life has been stressful, to say the least, and if I may go a step further, absolutely migraine-inducing.

There have been few times in my life where I was sure of who I was and what I wanted. This isn’t a surprise, by any means. I’m a teenager. A child. I don’t know what I’m going to be doing a month from now, let alone five years, so how could I really understand where I’m going? How could any of us, who’ve barely seen the outside of our hometowns? But even when I think I have an idea, the slightest inkling, of whatever it is that I might be looking towards, there’s always been

something missing.

That something has varied from activity to activity, but it all sums up to one thing: it’s all right that I don’t particularly excel in these areas, but I’m not motivated to try to be better, either. Because of this, I always felt out of place, like the people around me were always a step ahead. Like I wasn’t as good as I should’ve been.

Then, at the beginning of my junior year, coming off of over a year of social distancing and virtual learning, I found myself a staff reporter in room 139. I was terrified. I didn’t know what I was going to do, how I was going to do it. I was lost and there was no foreseeable way for me to manage it. Then I got my first assignment. I wrote my interview questions, my rough draft, I got my first edits, and then it was finished.

I had spent the previous year working with a virtual staff made up of students from Howell, North, and Central, but none of it was ever published. Nobody knew where it was supposed to go. But now, I

was working with a group that, while thrown off by the pandemic, knew what they were doing and what they were working towards. This meant that I finally had something tangible to work toward. Something that would display my work. Something that finally let me share my writing with whatever fraction of an audience it would find.

That something gave me a renewed sense of motivation. My work wasn’t just going to gather dust in my Google Drive. It was going to be seen and enjoyed and criticized. It was going to be given the choice of being ignored, instead of being swept aside because there wasn’t anywhere for it to go.

That’s around where I would date the start of it: my enjoyment, my investment, my desire to improve. It wasn’t something I’d seen in a while, but when that feeling came back, when I realized it was this work that had given it to me, the trap was set and there was no pulling myself out of it. This is what I would do. No matter how unimportant it may seem, how unimpressive or unremarkable, this idea of writing, of communicating and informing, it was exactly what I had been looking for.

The paper gave me that need to improve that I had always seen in others around me: my friends in choir, my peers on sports teams, my teachers in their jobs. I finally knew where I wanted to try.

I wasn’t amazing, by any means. Looking back now, I find myself cringing at mistakes that don’t even occur to me, at

Then the end of the school year loomed closer and closer. Almost all of our editors were seniors, and I was determined to put myself out there…until I actually had to put myself out there.

I was absolutely terrified. Who was I? Who was I to reach for an editor’s position after only my first year on a real staff? Who was I, who had been nothing more than an ordinarily performing student?

These questions appeared often, even in the midst of writing my editor application. Even when I was getting ready to send it to our adviser. Even when it had already been submitted.

I knew the answer, I think, to the questions I’d asked myself over and over again, it just took me a while to realize it. I was myself. I was the person that had spent so long spending time in a feeling of apathy, knowing I wouldn’t be great and choosing not to try to at least be better. I was the person that was hit in the face with the realization of what it was to try, the person who asked themself why they didn’t do so in the first place. Damn the challenges and hardships.

For so long, I thought that to truly enjoy something, you had to excel. But to be good is one thing. To try is completely another, and just as completely fulfilling.

Illustration by Emily Sirtak

The Burden Upon Our Backs

The obligations that come with being the first-born daughter

By Rachel Blanchard Staff Reporter

I am a walking archetype of an eldest daughter. Bossy, responsible, uptight, competitive, a perfectionist, all are stereotypical traits of an oldest daughter that I embody. These traits aren’t just something that all first-born daughters are born with, it is something that we are trained to be. We are trained when we are put into roles of therapist, second mother, babysitter, and perfect role model, before we even reach our teenage years.

Of course we are bossy and competitive and perfectionists, we have no other choice but to fit into the mold, no choice but to do what is required of us.

Children are told not to grow up too fast, and eldest daughters aren’t the exception, we were told this too. The difference is that while we were being told not to worry about adult problems, they were being placed on our backs.

As children, we were forced to carry the burden that many adults aren’t ready to

Older and younger sister watch the reflections of themselves, not yet understanding the roles that their ages place on them. Photo courtesy of Rachel Blanchard.

handle. More often than not, oldest daughters grow up with an extreme sense of responsibility. And not just in the sense that we grew up being responsible for keeping our rooms clean, but something more serious than that.

Eldest daughters can find themselves feeling that they must carry the burden of the raising of their siblings, the happiness of their family, keeping their household together in hard times, and other weighty topics. This wasn’t an idea that just popped into our brains, it was something that was placed on us before we even knew how to spell “responsibility.”

Though there is not one person or idea that this phenomenon can be traced back to, there are certain ideas that could be partially to blame, like traditional gender roles that place the mother as the sole caregiver, causing them to expect the eldest daughter to take on a motherly role when they need help, which is almost all the time.

This feeling isn’t something that goes away once the daughter leaves the household, oldest daughters can find that the pressures placed on them as a child follow them throughout their lives, and can be seen in the people-pleasing tendencies that stem from the responsibility for everyone else’s wellbeing.

Pressure and responsibility are a package that comes with the role of “second mother.” Much like the parents of the family, the oldest daughter must be a role model for the younger children.

Parents often shape their oldest child, specifically daughter, into the “perfect child” in the hopes that the daughter will make sure that her younger siblings will follow in her footsteps. The eldest daughter, and “perfect child” must have perfect grades, be respectable, be better than average in whatever hobby she chooses to pursue, and must not step off of the path laid

out for her.

It is also expected that she pulls her younger siblings onto this path as well, and makes sure that they don’t veer off, yet she cannot be upset when she finds her siblings becoming a carbon copy of her and replicating her every move. She is expected to steer her siblings in the right direction completely on her own, even But what point is there in creating the perfect daughter if the other children are allowed to do whatever they want, rather than following in her footsteps?

These pressure and responsibilities are what

cause oldest daughters to fit into the archetype. “Oldest daughter syndrome” follows the women it affects for their entire life. We still feel the burden of everyone else’s happiness and wellbeing, we still feel the need to put everyone else’s needs before our own, and we still feel the anxiety that comes with the pressure to be perfect.

There is no way to give back the childhood we lost when we were forced into the roles of perfect child and second mother, but our parent’s shaping of us made us who we are.

People-pleasing becomes selflessness, the pressure to be perfect becomes ambition, our roles as second mothers are what taught us to be strong leaders, and the responsibility for other’s happiness is what made us kind and empathetic. Through the pressure and responsibility of our youths, we were shaped into the women we are, and the women we are going to become.

Older sister peers out of the window at the top of the arch, younger sister by her side. They wear their hair the same, the younger sister is already following the oldest daughter’s path. Photo courtesy of Rachel Blanchard.

The oldest daughter already feels the pressure to keep her siblings in line. Photo courtesy of Rachel Blanchard

By Rocco Muich Staff Photographer

Opening the door to our flaws

Once I was told to do a photo about flaws I was dumbfounded at first. I had no idea how to capture flaws without doing something that hasn’t been done. Physical flaws are something that I’ve already seen so I decided to try to do mental flaws, something people struggle to capture. Mental flaws to me are people that struggle with depression or PTSD or any other mental illness.

I chose that idea to portray the flaw because people tend to think they are

not as equal, or flawed, compared to people without mental illness.

My whole thought process with the piece was to make it as visually eye catching and appealing as possible.

I wanted to do a long exposure to make it seem I was more faint and distant than everything else. Shooting a long exposure also allowed me to create motion before the click so it allowed me to look fuzzy and not fully there which I love. I made sure to make the whole image uneven so the viewer could pick

out individual flaws in the bathroom I was in so they would look at longer than just the two seconds for a normal photo.

I’m really happy how it came out and am very thankful to get this opportunity to share my thought process and hopefully bring a little awareness to mental health.

If you are feeling lost or struggling with mental health, you are not alone. You can talk to a trusted friend or adult or seek out your counselor here at school.