FOOLISH TIMES DECEMBER 2019

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What the Bleep is Foolish Times? Foolish Times is a free monthly tabloid publishing the best humor we can find (some months we search harder than others). The opinions or ideas expressed by contributors are not necessarily those of Foolish Times, its owner, advertisers, or associates, or their extended families, or their friends or neighbors, or their associated pen pals, up to and including cockatiels. All articles, graphics, photographs, and what-not (especially the what-not) are copyrighted by the so-called”writers” and”artists” who contribute them. Foolish Times uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases where public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.

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List of Fools Chucklehead................................Stevie P. Editor at Large..................................Javlis Art Fool...............................Mama Morgan Social Media Fool.............................Jordo Web Fool..........................................Zachy Sales Fool.....................................Michael Cover Art By Chuck Scardina Illustrated By Morgan Mecham

Contributors

Tony Albano, Bini, Charles Birimisa,Ted Gargiulo, Jann Gargiulo, Debbie Harris, Michael Houston, Daria James, Robyn Justo, Rex Keyes Dana Larabee, Nancy Pyzel, Jay Russell, Mary Tompsett

The Chucklehead Speaks Have you been good all year? Has anyone ever been good all year? This guy Santa Clause is making a list, checking it twice. He’s going to find out who’s naughty or nice. Who does he think he is; Google or Facebook? Santa wasn’t the first in invade our privacy and he isn’t the last. His method of collecting data on us seems prehistoric by today’s standards. Facebook users send on average of 31.25 million messages and view 2.77 million videos every minute. Smart phones have sensors capable of collecting all kinds of data, not to mention the data the users create themselves. The big data and analytics market will be worth $103 billion by 2023. I work a lot and have a limited social life. A person who tolerates my schedule calls me her statistically significant other because by her analysis, I spent more time with her than anyone else. Her data is skewed and her methodology is as off kilter as I am after a few beers. She has graphs that show trending

for different times of the year. I’m not exactly peeking this month. Let’s face it, they got us right where it counts, our privacy. If you think you can get way with something because no one is looking, get over yourself. Either a hidden camera or your phone knows where you are and what you are up to. If you think that closing the door to the bathroom is your only sanctuary for privacy, you are very mistaken. I give up, I surrender. I decided to take the first step in showing I don’t care anymore. I’m not sure the folks in line for their morning cup of coffee at Starbucks felt the same way when they saw me sitting on the toilet with the bathroom door open. Happy Holidays, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Winter Solstice, Happy Christmas and Happy Kwanzaa. That’s a lot of happy. Let keep that spirit going in the New Year.

Stevie P. / publisher@foolishtimes.net

Cartoonists

Andre Adams, Will Bullas, Max Cannon, Roger Freed, Chris Myers, Chuck Scardina, David Schmidt, Monte Truitt

Foolish Times • P.O. Box 4046 Monterey, CA 93942 831.648.1038 • www.foolishtimes.net


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