Just for Her Issue 20 by Forces & Corporate Publishing Ltd

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ISSUE 20

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Directory for the Wives, Girlfriends and Families of Military Personnel

Just for Her is looking for interesting and relevant articles about the Service community…

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If you have something you have written, ideally with pictures too, then please send your articles in to justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk.

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Directory for the Wives, Girlfriends and Families of Military Personnel

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Military Relationship Survival Tips

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Supporting the Unsung Hero’ business boom The University of Wolverhampton’s businessstart up programme, ‘Supporting the Unsung Hero’, is helping spouses and dependants’ of serving Armed Forces personnel, Veterans and Reservists realise their ambition to start-up and grow a successful business. ‘Supporting the Unsung Hero’ is a tailored business programme designed to meet the needs of Armed Forces families, and was one of the original bids to the £35 million LIBOR fund.

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Since then, the course and mentoring programme has been in high demand having already been attended by 520 delegates with 740 expected to complete the programme by 2021. HSBC bank recently announced it will continue to sponsor the programme enabling the delivery team at the University of Wolverhampton and Black Country Chamber of Commerce to further expand on the already award winning programme.

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work together and share their skills to develop new products and services. Sarah Walker, ‘Supporting the Unsung Hero’ Project Manager and Lead Trainer, says: “We are proud to be leading this programme and are very grateful to HSBC for continuing to fund the venture which forms an integral part of our range of opportunities for those who are currently serving in the Armed Forces their families and Veterans. This programme has the potential to create in excess of 700 new business start-ups by the end of 2021, significantly boosting our economy on a local and national scale.”

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Why would you choose a Hypnotherapist? Combining both Hypnotherapy and NLP using natural and holistic approaches creates excellent results to change Sessions can be provided for people worldwide via web video links, in the comfort of your home behaviours, alleviate stress or environment. and anxieties, depression If you would like to book your FREE symptoms as well as consultation or discuss a group session please get in touch at confidence, sexual or sharonadrain@sky.com physical abuse, weight facebook@sharonmindwarrior loss, fear and phobias, telephone 07926057286 insomnia to name a few. www.mind-warrior.com

Sharon can provide you with the tools you need to use when faced with certain situations, time and time again. Sharon is a Military wife and Mum, and has first hand experience of the difficulties faced in military life.

Once enrolled on the course participants also benefit from a closed online forum to encourage peer support and interaction with other delegates. Some members have started local business networking groups and have formed alliances to

Who can apply for the programme? The programme is open to a spouse or dependant (over the age of 16) of a Service person, Veteran or Reservist. We are also pleased to announce that we now accept applications from Armed Forces Veterans. How long does the programme last? Each Cohort will run for 10 months including 4 days of class based training with an experienced team of business advisers and dedicated one to one mentoring delivered either in person or virtually. When does the programme start? There are a range of start dates for each cohort to fit your requirements, contact the SUH team to find out the best course date and location to suit the individual. Is there a fee to attend the programme? There is no cost to participate in the programme as funding has been provided by the Armed Forces Covenant (LIBOR) Fund and the HSBC Bank (travel, accommodation and expenses incurred are not included). What type of business can delegates set up? The type of business set up is entirely up to the individual and could range from professional business consultancy, crafts and handmade gifts, bespoke art, catering services or personal fitness instructors. Participants may have a couple of business ideas and wish to use the course to explore each option or may not have a specific business in mind but wish to understand the basic principles of business start-up and gain inspiration from others. Can delegates set up a joint business with a family member or friend? Yes, delegates can set up a joint business with a family member or friend/s although only the eligible Spouse, Dependant or Veteran can attend the training course. Can those already running a business apply? Yes, delegates may still participate in the programme if already running a business in its infancy or need to develop their understanding of basic business management.

Courses are run throughout the UK at MOD bases from Scotland to Portsmouth and overseas in Cyprus, Belgium, Germany and Gibraltar. Mentoring and seminars are also delivered on-line via Skype or Facebook to make the course as accessible as possible and to allow for service mobility and family commitments. Delegates are offered a dedicated four-day business start-up training course, where they will learn and develop the skills required to run a business and understand their legal, financial and tax obligations, basic record keeping, marketing and how to write that all important business plan.

‘Supporting the Unsung Hero’ FAQ’s

Sally Wagstaff, a former Nurse in the Royal Navy and military spouse, enrolled on the first programme in October 2013. Since completing the course she has opened a state-of-the-art laser hair removal clinic in Lichfield and has since built on her success, opening a further salon at Aston Wood Golf and Country Club. She says: “I simply wouldn’t have started my business without the Supporting the Unsung Hero Business programme. The course has been so important, from giving me the confidence to launch to teaching me the skills to run and importantly grow my business. I recommend the programme highly.” Sarah Walker, Project Manager, said, “There is no end to the talent and resources within the Armed Forces community. As we enter the fourth year of the programme we hope to deliver in new locations such as Gibraltar to enable as many service spouses to access the course as possible, especially those who are in remote locations or overseas. ”

Who will be mentoring programme delegates? We are a team of friendly business experts from the University of Wolverhampton’s Business Solutions Centre. Participants are assigned an individual mentor for the duration of the programme. Once enrolled delegates will also be able to access a closed Facebook page which has proven to be a great source of peer-to-peer support. Are the training and mentoring sessions flexible? The dates of the four-day courses and group mentoring sessions are fixed. Individual mentoring sessions are flexible and can be delivered via Skype, phone or face to face. Are delegates obliged to set up a business by the end of the programme? There is no obligation to set up a business by the end of the programme, but ideally those who have completed the course will have a business up and running, as this is the aim of the programme. What will delegates achieve at the end of the programme? Participants will have all the tools and information required to kick-start their business. A certificate will also be awarded to demonstrate successful completion of the course and will become members of a unique group of like-minded people from the military community. If you have a business idea and need the skills and support to launch or you want to find out if running a business could be an opportunity for you contact the ‘Supporting the Unsung Hero’ team: Telephone: 01902 321 272 Email: suh@wlv.ac.uk Website: wlv.ac.uk/supportingtheunsunghero

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Welcome to issue 20 of Just for Her… Happy New Year to all of our readers! We hope you had a wonderful Christmas and are starting 2019 feeling positive and ready for the year ahead. Whether you have made new year’s resolutions or not, if you are wanting to focus on your health this year we have some great articles. Cathryn at Camberry gives us a beginners guide to lifestyle change and military wife Jo explains the beneﬁts on running in On The Run. If it’s spring cleaning on your mind, and like us you’re obsessed with Mrs Hinch, keep our Cleaning Tips to hand and you’ll have a sparkling home in no time! With Valentine’s Day on the horizon we take a look at Relationship Saving Tips and have got all of the Valentine’s Day Recipes you will need for a romantic night in. If you’re wanting to buy a gift for the special person in your life, be sure to enter our competition to win a £30 voucher for notonthehighstreet.com. You will probably have heard about Kleenex changing the name of their ‘Man Size’ tissues and there has been somewhat of a social media storm when it comes to gender equality and product names. We recently received a message via our Facebook page to let us know that we should change the name of our publication so as not to discriminate against men that wish to read it. It turns out it was a spoof message but it did get us thinking about creating controversy and whether we are turning into a nation of Keyboard Warriors. With the #metoo campaign highlighting an extremely important issue we consider Sexual Harrassment in the Military and what is being done to combat it. The Just for Her Book Club has lots of new members and we hope, if you haven’t already, that you will come and say hello soon. Each month we pick a new book to read

Military Relationship Survival Tips

Valentine’s Recipes

The InDependent Spouse

Going Keto

Clever Cleaning

Keyboard Warriors

Shop The Highstreet

Workplace Bullying

Your Home Patch

Sexual Harassment

The Ripple Pond

Book Club

WIN! East Anglian Game & Country Fair

On the Run

A Beginners Guide to Lifestyle Change 48 CBD Oil

Military & Me

WIN! £30 Voucher

Fashion Lookbook

Winter Breaks

Cities A to Z - Queenstown

and then discuss it on the last Sunday of the month. Thank you for all of your support during 2018. We really appreciate it and love to hear from our readers and receive your contributions. For anyone who would like to contribute to the next issue, the closing date is 22nd February 2019.

Many thanks to Kate Saines and Rebecca Smith for their editorial contribution

Until next time…

Enjoy!

Articles and photographs reproduced by kind permission of the contributors © No responsibility for the quality of goods or services advertised in this magazine can be accepted by the publishers or printers. Advertisements are included in good faith. The MOD or any Service Establishment is not responsible for the advertiser or its advertised product or service.

Forces & Corporate Publishing Ltd, Hamblin House, Hamblin Court, Rushden, Northants NN10 0RU. Tel: 01933 419994 www.forcespublishing.co.uk justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk @justforhermag Editorial: Joanna Barnes Design: Amy Leverton

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miss you x

Military Relationship Survival Tips Relationships are hard. Period. Though there are many positives to military life, having a partner in the military can sometimes be lonely, worrying and downright difficult. Make things a little easier by reading our top tips on keeping your military relationship strong, even when you may be going through the toughest of times.

Creative communication You can’t always Skype or Facetime when you want to, and sometimes a lot of time goes by without hearing from them. But there are ways to communicate without talking to each other at the drop of a hat (or push of a button!). Write some open-when letters - open when you miss me, open when you’re feeling sad, open when you’re ‘in the mood’ (wink, wink). Send them with your partner before they deploy and ask them to write some for you too. They might just help you to pick each other back up again in your lowest moments. Send emails and write letters about your day even when you know they won’t be able to read them straight away, even if not much has

happened or what you’re telling them seems mundane. Writing is cathartic for you, and getting your feelings and thoughts out onto paper can make you feel miles better, and for them, reading about your trip to Tescos or something funny that happened on the tube home will make them feel more connected to you and your life when where they are is so very different from home. The kids can get in on this too - get them to make a scrapbook of their days during their parent’s deployment so that when they are home they can go through it and talk about all the things they have done whilst they’ve been away. Keep cinema tickets to put in it, school awards and print off

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speak every single night. But talking about things like this before they go can avoid you feeling disappointed or lonely and can curb bad feelings towards each other.

Allow yourself to feel all the emotions of deployment

“Writing is cathartic for you, and getting your feelings and thoughts out onto paper can make you feel miles better, and for them, reading about your trip to Tescos or something funny that happened on the tube home will make them feel more connected to you and your life when where they are is so very different from home.”

some photos of days out. They can write about the books they’ve read, places they’ve visited, friends they’ve made and it will all be ready to look through together when their mum or dad gets home.

Do things together Whilst you can’t nip down the pub or walk along the beach hand in hand, there are ways to stay connected even over a long distance. Create a photo album for them to take with them, and have an identical one for you at home so you can spend a phone call going through it together and talking about happy memories. Organise to read the same book over the course of their deployment, or watch the same TV series on DVD. Deployments can often leave couples feeling not just miles apart but worlds apart when the lives you are living are temporarily so different, having things like this can help you relate to each other and feel connected.

Set expectations Before your partner heads off, communicate both of your expectations and talk about how you can meet those needs for each other. Couples who set clear expectations, such as how often you will try and communicate, be it by phone, letters or sending photos, ahead of time are more likely to cope better during times of separation. Obviously, you need to be realistic, there is no point expecting to

It’s OK to cry, to feel angry, to have ‘I didn’t sign up for this!’ moments. It’s also OK to share these feelings with your partner. Being honest about your feelings is important in every relationship; you won’t do anyone any favours by bottling it all up. Of course you don’t want to unleash an emotional onslaught onto your partner every time you speak, and you don’t want to guilt trip them, but sharing your feelings in a genuine way and letting them share theirs too will help you feel better supported and will bring you closer together.Your time may be precious when you do have time to talk but don’t put pressure on yourself to make every conversation be all sunshine and rainbows. Be honest, talk about the bad as well as the good, and always try to end on an ‘I love you’.

Don’t avoid the uncomfortable conversations And speaking of difficult conversations, certain topics are necessary but uncomfortable. Make sure you sit down to talk about wills and power of attorney at some point. We all hope these things will never be necessary but it’s better to talk about them before you are in the middle of a crisis and wishing you had spoken about them before. Remember to keep living your own life It’s so easy to put everything on pause during a deployment. To hole up, shut the world out and binge watch Netflix for months on end. But making sure you still get out there and do the things that bring you joy, and follow your own dreams, will not only make you happier but they will also bring your partner peace of mind that they don’t need to worry about you when they aren’t there, because you have 100% got this.You don’t have sit around, feeling lonely and waiting for the phone to ring. Get out, join some new classes or groups, and continue to live the life you want to lead, even if you don’t have the person you wish was there the most beside you all of the time. But remember to take your phone with you when you are out and about – just in case they do call!

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ou don’t need an expensive restaurant booking this year, with our romantic menu you can do it all from home! What better way to celebrate Valentines Day than with a cosy homemade meal for two in the candlelight? Serve up these aphrodisiac-infused recipes and your romantic evening is sure to go off without a hitch.

VALENTINES Aphrodisiac-Infused Recipes

Oysters with Ceviche Topping 1 tsp. Coriander seeds 1/4 c. Pear 1/4 c. Cucumber 1 Jalapeno Pepper 1 tbsp. Coriander 1 tbsp. fresh lime juice 1 tsp. Candied ginger 1 tsp. Fish sauce 1 tsp. Extra-virgin olive oil Salt & pepper 12 Oysters

Oysters make a wonderful appetiser, and are one of the most well-known aphrodisiacs – for good reason too. Cassanova claimed to eat 50 oysters for breakfast every day, and swore they were the reason behind his boundless energy and libido. Scientifically, they’re high in zinc, which is thought to increase testosterone which affects desire in both men and women. In a small skillet, toast the coriander seeds over moderate heat until fragrant, about 2 minutes. Let them cool, then coarsely crush the seeds in a mortar. In a small bowl, mix the crushed coriander with all of the remaining ingredients except the oysters. Arrange the oysters on crushed ice. Spoon some of the topping on each one and serve right away, passing additional topping at the table.

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Asparagus, Ricotta and Egg Pizza Asparagus was a well-known aphrodisiac in ancient times, and during the 17th century, an English herbalist described it as a vegetable which “stirs up lust in man and woman”. This pizza is easy, delicious and lust-i-liscious. 12 ounces refrigerated fresh pizza dough 2/3 cup part-skim ricotta cheese 1/8 teaspoon salt 1 1/2 cups asparagus, trimmed and cut into 1-inch pieces 2 teaspoons extra-virgin olive oil 4 large eggs 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper 1 ounce Parmesan cheese, grated (about 1/4 cup) Handful of rocket leaves Place a pizza stone or heavy baking sheet into the oven. Preheat oven to 260° C (keep pizza stone or baking sheet in the oven as it preheats). Let dough stand at room temperature for 30 minutes and combine the ricotta and salt in a small bowl. Roll dough into an 11-inch circle on a floured surface. Carefully remove the pizza stone or sheet from the oven and arrange the dough on it. Spread the ricotta mixture over the dough, leaving a 1/2-inch border. Combine the asparagus and oil in a bowl. Top the ricotta mixture with the asparagus mixture, gently pressing the asparagus into the ricotta. Bake at 260° C for 5 minutes. Pull the pizza out of the oven carefully, just enough so you can crack the eggs over top of pizza (try not to remove the pizza from oven completely). Bake for 4 minutes or until whites are set. Sprinkle with pepper, Parmesan and rocket to finish.

For the pears: 4 Conference pears slightly under ripened 1 Bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon 1 Star anise 1 Cinnamon stick 2 Bay leaves 1½ c. Water (or enough to cover pears in the pot) ½ Vanilla bean 4 Tbsp Sugar For the mascarpone ﬁlling: 8 oz Mascarpone - room temperature ½ Vanilla Bean ½ Tbsp Vanilla extract 3 Tbsp Half fat cream 2 Tbsp Icing sugar

Poached Pears with Red Wine and Vanilla Bean Marscapone Filling What better way to finish off the evening (or maybe just begin it..!) than with red wine? Ripe juicy pears have been considered an aphrodisiac by many cultures for hundreds of years, as the shape of fruit is viewed as a botanical celebration of the female form, and cabernet sauvignon is well known for boosting male pheromones. For the pears: Peel, core, and cut pears in half lengthwise. In a pot large enough to fit the 8 pear halves, combine the wine, spices, sugar, pears and water. Bring to a gentle simmer and cook for about 40 minutes, until pears become fork tender. The cooking time will vary depending on the ripeness of the pears. For the mascarpone cream: Meanwhile, combine mascarpone, vanilla, sugar, and half fat cream into a mixing bowl and beat on high until it becomes smooth and creamy. Add more half fat cream if you want it to be a little bit thinner. 7

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Thai Chilli Martini Spicy food is well known for getting people in the mood for love, and Thai chillies are one of the strongest aphrodisiacs out there, thanks to their high amount of capsaicin. Capsaicin causes increased circulation, allowing your blood to flow faster and stronger, stimulating your body. 1 Serrano or Thai chilli (or adjust amount to your heat preference) 1/2 ounce (15ml) Pure Cane Sugar Syrup 1 1/2 ounces (45ml) Gin or Vodka 2 ounces (60ml) Peach, nectarine, or pineapple juice Clean the chilli and remove the seeds (you might want to start with just a little bit of chilli and increase the amount to your liking). In a shaker, muddle the chilli with sugar syrup. Add gin (or vodka) and juice of choice to the shaker. Add ice and shake vigorously for 15 seconds. Strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with a chilli, and for a sweeter treat, sugar the rim before pouring the cocktail.

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After the war in former Yugoslavia, I worked with returning soldiers, some as young as 18. They suffered from nightmares, grief, and anxiety. They were from a Dalmatian island and had no access to support, but after using the tools I want to share with you they found relief. We practiced ‘tapping’, sharing, and breathing. The next year more traumatised people came to us- too many for us to handle alone- so we trained them to go out and help others, which they still do with powerful results. Efforts are being made to establish these methods as standard procedures for treatment of military-induced Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Treatments can be quick to administer and thorough in the relief they provide. Psychologists and doctors accustomed to longer healing times for their patients are often astonished at how quickly long-standing traumas can be resolved by these techniques. The main technique is EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique)

healing phrases, gentle tapping with your fingers on a handful of easily learned acupressure points, and breath awareness. EFT isn’t just for PTSD- these techniques can be used as a reliable support whenever you feel you’re struggling. I see it as a first aid kit for the emotions. I am a yoga therapist, pain specialist, and energy psychologist with a passion for easing mental strain and trauma. For your loved ones, you don’t often have the antidote for grief and heartache, and these methods are great tools to have. It can actually become child’s play, and I have found it a wonderful way to get children and adults to open up into authentic sharing. When we hurt, we become children again and yearn for compassion and support.

tapping. Tapping is gaining huge momentum and is used in combination with psychotherapy by the NHS. It is also used as an entirely separate, standalone therapy and, importantly, it works for home use - there when you really need it. But how does this therapy actually work? Emotional Freedom Technique combines well-established psychological therapy techniques with insights from traditional Eastern medicine. In simple terms, EFT provides relief from emotional discomfort by the repetition of

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Tools for your emotional First Aid kit - simple but powerful medicine for the whole family

5 videos to get you started NOW sign up for a free self-help mini course http:// my121yoga.com/ energy-psychology My mini home coaching course will give you the tools you needno prior experience necessary. I’m also available via SKYPE for further support Lesson 1: EFT-tap and breathe Introduction to EFT tapping and fast relief technique to lower the base tension and start increasing resilience, perspective and ease. Strengthen your nervous system. Lesson 2: Take 5 Breathing Find the pause button quick, suitable for the whole family. It is a wonderful way to switch off the stress response. It brings the body back into balance, slowing and deepening the breath and slowing down the heart rate, while

harnessing the need to move with an action that requires focus and provides sensory feedback to our brains. Lesson 3: Yogic breath work Establish breathing patterns that help you slow down. In 2010, an international study reaffirmed this timeless wisdom by showing that slow abdominal breathing techniques reduced the “fight-or-flight” response of the sympathetic nervous system. Lesson 4: Jin shin jyutsu 5-fingers system Rediscovered ancient Japanese art form. It releases stagnation and feeds life into all of your cells. Holding 1 finger at a time to calm emotions and promote ease, which makes JSJ one of the simplest and most effective bioenergetic practices I know. Lesson 5: Energy Medicine get out of ‘fight or flight’ mode We use 2 sides of our brain. One stores stories, habits and is linear; the other is creative, unperturbed and intuitive. These techniques get us unstuck and help us cross over easier from left to right side of the brain to achieve ‘rest and digest mode’ the ability to regain perspective, ease and a sense or control over complex situations.

“Just for her” readers special: Emotional freedom technique support online 30 min Skype consultation usually £40 Exclusive intro offer 50% off. Iron out questions or go deeper.

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Handcrafted Holistic Healing Gemstone Jewellery & Accessories

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Finding the perfect gift can be difficult so we have selected the best selling personalised gifts & cards and placed them online in one convenient shop. We hope that this makes choosing the perfect gift more fun! The majority of gifts that we supply are uniquely designed in-house and made to your exact requirements. From wedding gifts to birthday presents, we have gifts to cover all occasions. We even have personalised gifts for pets! Please take a look at our website - you might be surprised at what you’ll find!

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Jess Sands is the founder of Design Jessica, a successful graphic design company that was also one of the 2018 Small Business Saturday winners. As a RAF wife who chose to follow her husband around the country with postings, she knows first-hand how difficult it can be keeping meaningful employment while supporting the service personnel in the family. This inspired her to start The InDependent Spouse™, a podcast series that showcases other spouses running their own businesses while living ‘the magnolia wall life’.

In this article Jess shares with us her best startup tips to consider if you’re thinking about starting your own posting-proof business.

s military spouses, we often end up putting our career dreams on hold to follow our serving partner. With deployments, frequent moves and growing families, it can be difficult to keep great jobs or pursue careers that won’t move with us. In the 2018 MOD’s UK Tri-Service Families Continuous Attitude Survey surveying more than 5,000 spouses and civil partners of regular trained Service Personnel found that 50% of respondents said their family life was disadvantaged compared to the general public, especially when it comes to employment.

What is it that you’re going to do?

What if we could build a business that was posting proof? Wouldn’t it be nice to have a business that moves when you do regardless of when that posting notice arrives? It’s time to stop dreaming about working from anywhere and actually do it!

Are you already working full time in a job that you could turn into a business?

When deciding whether to start a business you need to have an idea about what you’re going to do, how you’re going to do it and ensure that you’re passionate to do it. If you’re reading this you might have an idea, and you may have even started researching, so here are my handy tips to get going.

You need an idea to start a business. I was lucky, I knew from an early age that I loved to design, so it was an no brainer for me to move into freelancing before launching my own company. But it might not be so clear to you. Maybe you’re a keen crafter that creates beautiful pieces that your friends have always asked to buy or maybe you have a flair for making birthday cakes for your children and have had a few friends ask you to create theirs? Maybe you were an accountant or an assistant in your previous career, and you still have the skills to do this? These are great strengths that can be transformed into a commercial business.

If you’re already working in an industry that you love and think that you could create your own business in that industry then you’re already a step ahead. Many of the businesses I work with started their companies to the side of their main job and grew it during the evenings and at weekends. It’s called working the 5-9. It means that you can build up your client list while you have the stability of a monthly income. This is what I did. I worked full

time in a design agency and then took on extra clients in my ‘free’ time. I must admit that this was incredibly hard work and I spent far too many hours designing, but with enough self-care and motivation I was able to build up my client list and go completely self-employed. But be warned – If you are in a job where you could have issues with conflicts of interest then check your employment contract thoroughly.You don’t want to get on the wrong side of your employer, especially if they could be a future client or customer of your new business.

Are you already doing it as a hobby? Think about what you do in your spare time. Perhaps you’re into health and exercise and think that you’d enjoy running your own running or training business. Or perhaps you’ve been doing calligraphy for a while and want to monetise it. If you’ve already unknowingly started your business as a hobby then you’ve probably got enough experience and knowhow to move it into a profitable business, especially if already have a demand from friends asking for your service then why not get paid for it?

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Action: But what if you just aren’t sure what you want to do? Make a list of your strengths, skills and what is it that you love doing. What are you good at? What do you enjoy talking about? If your business idea is in the list then that’s a great start to finding your own business idea.

Is there a need for your product or service? Sadly, a lot of start-up businesses fail in their first year. One reason might be because there isn’t a customer base for your product or service. Think long and hard about whether there is an existing market for the business you want to create. Research companies in the same industry that are doing something similar. Not only will that give you a great idea on how successful they are, it also means that there is a market for your business. While you’re researching try not to get overwhelmed with what other companies are doing.You’ll be able to apply your own special knowhow or product to this industry later, and it’s this that will make you unique to your own clients and customers. There’s a chance that if you can’t find a company doing anything similar the likelihood is that you probably won’t be able to turn it into a profitable business – there’s probably no demand for it. However, if it’s a new product or service that doesn’t exist, and you know that there is a gap in the market then there’s no reason that it wouldn’t be successful, you’d just need to do some more detailed research and product audience testing.

Could you make money from it? Running a business can sometimes be expensive.You might have overheads and costs that you’ll need to consider before you start and as your business grows, especially if you’re a product-based business. Even service businesses with very low overheads still need to think about how they’re going to make some income to pay for these initial expenses. Have a good look at others that are running similar businesses to see the kinds of prices they’re charging for their products and services and see if it’s still something that you can make an income from when you’ve considered your overheads, production costs and time. Action: Make a list of everything you might need to get started and price it up, compare

this to the expected income you hope to make in your business. But don’t get disheartened, many businesses struggle in the first few years to make a serious income and most owners choose to put any profit they make back into building the business. With hard work and a bit of courage you can certainly create a business that will not only be transient but can pay you a wage.

Does your idea get you excited? Running a business can sometimes be a bit of a lonely existence. When I am working on a deadline in my office I often don’t see another human for hours, especially if my husband is deployed! It’s very different from working within a big company. What makes the difference is that I completely love what I do. I get excited everyday about working in my business and on my business. It’s so different to working for ‘the man’, and although it’s really hard work sometimes I wouldn’t have it any other way. Action:You have to be really excited about what you chose to do as you’ll probably be doing it every day, so now is the time to really think about whether you could spend a large chunk of your time doing it.

Could it be transient? Military life means that our partners could be posted at any time, sometimes every few years and you could choose to follow, taking your business with you. If you decide to build your business to be transient there should be no reason why you can’t keep trading no matter where you end up.

communicate well. If you start a bricks and mortar business you might struggle and you’ll probably have to think of a clever way to move the company if and when you’re posted. But it can be done so don’t rule it out straight away.

Is it practical to start your own business? Running a business is time consuming. Consider these things before you start. * If you don’t think about when you’re going to work you’ll have clients calling at all hours and making demands of you when you aren’t available. * If you have children you might need to consider child care, especially if your serving spouse is operational, and your business should be making enough money to cover this expense. * You should consider the locations that you could be posted to the future. If you’re expecting a foreign posting you’ll have to look into the legalities of running your business abroad. * And if you’re running a business from your married quarter where you will be expecting a lot of clients visiting you’ll need to research whether you’d be allowed that sort of business running from your quarter.

With proper planning you can run a business around many of the demands service and family life makes on us.

I specifically set up my business to be transient so that I could follow my husband and his job. I have a load of systems in place to mean that if we had to move next week all I would need is my computer and some wi-fi – Could your idea do the same? It’s definitely a bit easier for service companies to relocate if your clients are happy with you working virtually – you just need to be really honest with them and

With proper planning you can run a business around many of the demands service and family life makes on us. Don’t be disheartened by your research, if you’ve planned ahead and checked through the proper channels you should be able to keep your business running no matter where you’re posted. Running your own business can be very hard work but so very rewarding, especially if you’re a military spouse who has chosen to follow their serving spouses’ job. It’s not something to be entered into half-heartedly, but it is something that can give you an amazing buzz and let you experience some great things.

If you want to hear the stories of others that are running their own businesses head over to

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GOING

Keto

A keto or ketogenic diet is a high fat, adequate protein, low carb diet, which turns the body into a fat-burning machine.

For a long time I’ve suffered from joint pain, IBS and migraines, as well as being a bit overweight, so when I was talking to a friend who asked me if I’d ever thought of trying the keto diet to try and improve my symptoms and shed some pounds I was intrigued… I have tried many, many different diets and The Keto Plan is, I think, quite an extreme one. It’s been in the media a lot lately, with celebrities such as Halle Berry, Kourtney Kardashian and Matthew McConaughey following the plan, and is said to harbour many benefits including keeping type 2 diabetes under control, weight loss, reducing inflammation within the body and lowering high blood pressure. Before I launched myself into going keto for two months to see what all the fuss was about, I spoke to my doctor to see if he thought it was a good idea. Aside from a few raised eyebrows over his glasses whilst I explained my plans, he agreed that my health was in good enough condition that it wouldn’t hurt to try it, although he made a point of not letting it become a long-term change. The keto diet isn’t for everyone, and if you want to give it a go I recommend that you consult your GP to see what they think first. Although the keto diet is hugely popular now for improving how your body burns fat amongst other things, it actually started out as an alternative type of fasting to treat epilepsy back in the 1920s. Doctors back then discovered that patients suffering from epilepsy had fewer seizures when they were showing symptoms of low blood sugar, or starvation. So the ketogenic diet was created in order to trick the bodies of patients into thinking they were starving, without actually starving them. The basic premise of The keto diet is to force your body into a metabolic state known as “ketosis”, which is when your body switches from burning carbohydrates as its primary fuel source to burning fat instead. The liver begins to produces ketones, and to 14

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get your body to do this, you need to eat a very low amount of carbohydrates (between 20-50g per day for most people) and eat a very high fat content which your body will primarily get its energy from, with a moderate protein intake. It’s often likened to the Atkins diet, but the main difference with keto is the strict counting of macronutrients, or “macros”, which are your carbohydrate, protein and fat percentages. The ideal macro pie chart for somebody on the keto diet would be around 5-10% calorie intake from carbs, 15-30% from protein and a huge 60-75% from fat. Full disclaimer - I tried the keto diet off my own back. I did what would be considered by strict keto-ers as ‘lazy keto’. I didn’t focus too much on my macro percentages, as long as I was roughly hitting them. I didn’t visit a dietician or nutritionist to work out body fat percentage and get a precise figure of how many grams of carbs I was allowed, I used an online calculator to roughly guess at it. I ate mostly whole foods, and tried to get my fat sources from healthy fats – avocados, olive and coconut oils, nut butters etc - but did occasionally drink diet fizzy drinks and eat processed meats. I joined some Facebook groups for inspiration and support, but I didn’t pay or sign up to a particular plan or group, I basically researched the diet myself and went from there. People who have tried ‘lazy keto’ and ‘strict keto’ agree that better results are seen with the more focused approach of being strict, but that ‘lazy keto’ is sometimes a good way to get going and get into the swing of making such a drastic lifestyle change, and that was good enough for me to begin with. There is a vast amount of information to take in about keto when you first begin and it can be overwhelming. The hardest thing to get my head around in the beginning was the huge amount of fat I needed to eat – it felt so wrong! I was drenching everything in butter, having double cream in my coffee, cooking in fat and eating fatty cuts of meat. It went against pretty much everything I’ve ever been taught about being healthy and losing weight and in all honesty, the novelty of it soon wore off at the start. By day 3 I felt nauseous at the idea of another fatty meal,

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had an awful headache, I was moody and was so low on energy I could barely drag myself out of bed. I was reassured online by my fellow keto-ers that this was completely normal, good in fact, as it meant I was eating the right things, and they assured me that it would pass soon. When you drastically change your diet in any way it takes your body time to adjust, and what I was experiencing was typical withdrawal symptoms from lack of carbs and sugar. This stage of going keto is commonly referred to as ‘the keto flu’ and I’ll be honest, it’s not great. It can last anywhere from a couple of days to two weeks. Lucky for me I only suffered for three days, and one week into the biggest and most drastic diet change I’ve ever made I actually started to feel pretty good. After two weeks I’d lost 10lbs – although most of this I’m told, was water weight. Carbs need water to stay in your body so when you stop eating them the first lot of weight loss is mainly down to that. Getting your body to go into full ketosis, where it is actually burning away fat stores for energy can take around 2-4 weeks, sometimes longer depending on each individual, but I felt super motivated after that first weigh in and I was ready to take on the next couple of weeks with a new found enthusiasm. I felt relieved that the ‘keto flu’ had passed and that I’d managed to get over that first hurdle – one where many people fall off as it can be hard feeling that rough and carrying on with it. After the initial tough first two weeks there were many pros that I was experiencing - my energy levels had begun to rise and level out - I wasn’t experiencing my usual 2pm slump in the afternoons and was no longer relying on coffee and chocolate bars to see me through the day. I wasn’t feeling so hungry all the time, either. Fat is far more satiating than carbs and sugar, so after switching to a keto diet and becoming ‘fat adapted’, it means you tend to eat less in general without going hungry or lacking energy. The first two weeks I had huge sugar cravings and found that the only way to push past them was with sheer willpower and avoiding temptation. I boxed up everything in the house that was considered ‘non-keto’ – chocolate bars, crisps, cakes, sweets, sadly even fruit – and gave it to friends and family for them to enjoy instead. I avoided going out for lunches and dinners with friends until those craving had passed and I felt more ‘established’ into the keto way of eating. This was a big con, missing out on café dates, but for me personally, with my lack of willpower, I think it had to be done. Another con was how thirsty I was, which led to many, many trips to the loo! As I mentioned before, carbs need water to stay in the body so not eating them makes your body let go of all that excess water which in turn makes you much thirstier to begin with. I was drinking plenty – something you must do when on the keto plan – but would still wake up in the night parched and needing the toilet constantly! Another thing that took some adjustment was organising my time better, as a lot of time is needed for meal prepping and planning. Lunches on the go went from a quick sandwich picked up in Tesco to having to think ahead the night before and taking boxes of ketofriendly food out with me everywhere. I had to meal plan for our weekly shop, and I really did miss takeaway nights! After my two months were up, I’d lost a total of a stone and a half. I felt amazing – probably the best I had in a long time. The closest I’d come to a migraine was when I had the keto flu, my IBS symptoms were completely under control for the first time in years without

medication. My joint pain had improved vastly, thanks to losing some weight but also due to the fact that eating keto improves inflammation within the body. I was happier, fitting into a dress a size lower than when I started and my self-esteem had improved. My mental focus was sharper and my energy levels soared. I decided to continue with the keto plan for a bit longer than I planned originally, as once I was into the swing of it it did get a lot easier and was actually quite enjoyable. I really liked trying out new recipes and unlike most diets I also really liked still being able to have a drink or two at the weekends as well! I did lose a little more, but heeding my doctors recommendation that the keto plan is not for long term use and with the fact we had a holiday coming up that I didn’t want to be restricting myself on food-wise, I threw in the towel at almost three months. I personally think that going keto for a few months of the year to ‘reset’ and being more mindful about the food we are eating in general when not following the plan strictly can be really beneficial. After I stopped eating keto I actually continued to lose weight, albeit at a much slower pace - this I think was down to the fact that I was thinking differently about the food I was eating. My cravings for sugar had practically disappeared after not eating any for just over two months, so when I fancy something sweet now I’m more likely to go for a piece of fruit than a chocolate bar or a cream cake (although I am happy that both of those things are back on the menu if I do wish to indulge!). The carb portions within all of my meals, although not being macro counted, must have halved compared to what I would have piled on my plate before and I think my overall intake of sugar and carbs is naturally lower than it was before I began the diet. With any diet you need to be prepared to make big lifestyle changes to see any results, and the keto diet is no exception. One thing I did like was that it’s not really possible to have a ‘cheat’ day on this diet plan. Once you have gotten into a state of ketosis, the minute you ‘cheat’ and eat a carb heavy meal or indulge in something sweet and sugary you will be out of ketosis and will have to work at getting back in it again. Some people can do this easily but most will experience ‘the keto flu’ symptoms again when transferring back into ketosis – headaches, muscle cramps and sluggishness. For me, no treat or cheat was worth feeling like that again and I think if I had indulged in a cheat day early on I would have fell well and truly off the wagon and not gotten back on again. I was lucky that my husband chose to follow the plan with me whilst I did it, it made it a lot easier being able to talk about it, meal plan and have each other for support for the tough patches. If you do choose to try the keto diet, remember than everyone loses weight differently and peoples bodies react in different ways. People choose to follow the plan for many reasons – for some people it’s about weight loss, for others it’s to help control a disease such as type two diabetes, or to help with joint pain and inflammation. Just remember to not compare your journey too much to others that may be doing it alongside you. My husband lost almost double what I did in the same time-frame but I’m still pleased with where I got to, I was more focused on feeling healthier than the weight loss side and I reached my goal of doing that.

Check out a few of our favourite meals we had during our time on the keto plan over the page… 15

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Breakfast Keto Frittata (4g carbs) 5 oz. diced bacon or chorizo 2 tbsp butter, for frying 8 oz. fresh spinach 8 eggs 1 cup heavy whipping cream 5 oz. grated cheese salt and pepper

Keto Chicken BLT Salad (4g carbs)

Preheat the oven to 175°C. Fry the bacon in butter on medium high heat until crispy. Add the spinach and stir until wilted. Remove the pan from the heat and set aside. Whisk the eggs and cream together and pour into a greased baking dish (9x9 inches) or in individual ramekins. Add the bacon, spinach and cheese on top and place in the middle of the oven. Bake for 25–30 minutes or until set in the middle and golden brown on top.

Keto Salmon Burgers 1½ lbs salmon 1 egg ½ yellow onion 1 tsp salt ½ tsp pepper 2 oz. butter, for frying Cut the fish in small pieces and place, along with the rest of the ingredients for the burger, in a food processor. Pulse for 30-45 seconds until you have a coarse mixture. Don’t mix too thoroughly; this can make the burgers tough. Shape 6-8 burgers and fry for 4-5 minutes on each side on medium heat in a generous amount of butter or oil. Serve with mashed cauliflower and broccoli with cheese and butter and a squeeze of lemon juice. 16

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1 lb boneless chicken thighs 1 oz. butter Â˝ lb bacon 4 oz. cherry tomatoes 10 oz. Romaine lettuce salt and pepper Mayonnaise & garlic powder for the dressing Mix mayonnaise and garlic powder in a small bowl and set aside. Fry the bacon slices in butter until crispy. Remove and keep warm. Save the grease in the pan. Shred the chicken and season with salt and pepper. Fry in the same skillet as the bacon until golden brown and thoroughly cooked. Rinse and shred the lettuce; be sure to use a clean cutting board and knife (different from the one used when handling the raw chicken). Place the lettuce on a plate and top with chicken, bacon, tomatoes, and a hearty dollop of garlic mayonnaise.

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lever leaning

as Christm a like if seems r y and our o m e m distant ing like us, y f bit o anyth you’re uld do with a nd the a co tagram ems that house s In to anks , it se TLC. Th rshinchhome nfectant and si f @m d to di y has come te c likes o i d d ne’s a d arm ever yo cleaning ma and cleaning s a whole r to share tip Out’ coming e th c e r h tog t a ‘Ma , we’ve got o G . s ic hack n’t pan up? Do u covered! yo

BIN BOOST If it’s a smelly bin that’s letting you down, there is a solution. Pour a capful of your favourite smelling disinfectant onto some kitchen roll and leave it in the bottom of your bin. Each time you change the bin bag, chuck it away and add another one. Instant refresh!

PEN MARK PAIN MATTRESS MAKEOVER

RUG REFRESH Mix together warm water, a capful of your favourite clothes washing gel and a capful of fabric softener and you’ve got yourself an instant rug refresh! The downside of this is you’ve got to get on your hands and knees and scrub with a bristle brush but once it’s done, not only will the rug look cleaner, your house will also smell amazing!

You may never have thought about cleaning your mattress but give this odour removing trick a try and you’ll be hooked! Fill a spray bottle with vodka… yes vodka… and spray it lightly across the sleeping surface. After it air dries it will have removed any odours and killed most of the bacteria.

Do you have an unsightly pen mark on a wooden surface, such as the dining room table where your little cherubs have been colouring?! The solution? Toothpaste! Dab a small amount of toothpaste on a soft cloth and gently rub away. Problem solved!

DELIGHTFUL DRAINS If there’s a strange smell coming from your kitchen sink, chances are you could do with cleaning the plugholes. Pour a healthy amount of soda crystals, directly into the plughole, and follow this with some white vinegar. Leave it for 5 minutes to work its magic and then rinse away anything that’s left with a kettle full of boiled water. Easy! Fresh smelling drains in no time. 18

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CLOTH CLEAN As the famous Mrs Hinch would say ‘put the cloths to bed’. This means filling your sink with warm water and a capful of disinfectant before you go to bed and leaving your cloths to soak in it overnight. By morning, they will not only smell lovely, the bacteria will have vanished.

SHOWERHEAD SPRUCE UP Fill a sandwich bag with white vinegar and secure it over your showerhead with an elastic band. Leave it overnight and by morning you will be able to wipe off the hard water deposits and soap scum with minimal effort. For taps, soak some kitchen towel in the vinegar and place over the top. Et Voila!

RADIATOR REVAMP To remove marks on radiators, in a spray bottle, mix a capful of your favourite fabric softener with some water. Spray this directly onto your radiators and rub with a soft cloth. The marks will be gone and when the radiators heat up, your home will smell of freshly laundered clothes. Lovely! This also works well on the woodwork around your home such as door frames and skirting boards.

BATH BLITZ Next time you want to clean away the grime in your bathtub or shower tray just cut a grapefruit in half and sprinkle some salt on it. Get your tub a little wet, pour a bit more salt into it and scrub using the grapefruit half. Rinse away for a clean citrussy fragrance!

CARPET CATASTROPHE

STICKY SITUATION Have you peeled off a sticker and left half of it behind?! Spray it with hairspray and it’ll come right off. You’re welcome!

Next time you get a stain on your carpet, fear not! Fill a spray bottle with water and vinegar (2 to 1 ratio), spray the spot and lay a damp cloth over it. Run a hot iron (with a steam setting) over the cloth for about 1 minute (longer if it’s a really bad stain) and the carpet will be stain free!

BLIND PANIC HEAVENLY HOME Place two capfuls of vanilla extract in a coffee cup and place in the oven at 150˚C for one hour. Within 20 minutes your whole house will smell delicious!

For anyone with slatted blinds, you’ve got to try this hack to keep them dust free. Using elastic bands, cover both sides of some kitchen tongs with microfibre cloths. Next, spritz with some polish or slightly dampen and then slide your tongs through the blinds to pick up all of the dirt and dust. No cloths? Use a pair of old socks!

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KEYBOARD WARRIORS Online, we seem to be living in a culture of outrage. In an age where we now have more access to other people’s opinions than ever, it has given us even more opportunities to become angry about those that we don’t agree with and enabled us to, behind the safety of our screens, stand on our digital soapboxes and spout our own rhetoric and air our grievances with the world with just a few keystrokes. Not a day seems to go by where a company or celebrity isn’t publically apologising or rebranding something that has been deemed ‘offensive’ by one group of people or another. When a person has a differing opinion to our own we take to our keyboards and lash out in haste with tweets, comments and status updates, letting the world know that we are offended. We seem to be living in a world where it’s now not okay to state your particular beliefs 20

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or values unless it includes everybody… creating somewhat of a paradox if including everybody goes against your actual core beliefs or values. One of my close friends, Jamie, is a devout Christian. He himself has said that he by no means speaks for all Christians with his opinions, but one of his more controversial thoughts that stems from his personal belief is that only men and women should marry. His opinion came to light over a bottle of wine a few years ago, just before same sex

marriage became legal in the UK, and my first thought turned to two of our other close friends, Ben and Neil. Ben and Neil are gay, and have lived together for the past 6 years. Jamie, his wife, and myself and my husband spend a lot of time together along with Ben and Neil, and we are a close-knit bunch. “But you’re friends with Ben and Neil?!” I exclaimed to him when he’d first told me his opinion. He nodded, seemingly surprised by my reaction. “Just because I don’t believe they should get married doesn’t mean I don’t like them as people, or even as a couple. I’m not against gay people, I just don’t believe that they should get married. It goes against my beliefs.” At first, I couldn’t get my head around it. I asked Jamie if he’d ever spoken to Ben or Neil about his thoughts and feelings on gay marriage – something they had fought and

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protested for in the lead up to it becoming legal and which I had supported alongside them. I was surprised when he said he had, and that they had discussed the matter civilly, listened to one another, respectfully agreed to disagree and moved on, as firm friends as ever. Apparently, in their case, it was as simple as that. “Just because we don’t support each other’s foundational beliefs – they don’t believe in God, for instance, whereas a large part of my identity is my faith – it doesn’t mean that we hate each other. I’ve never actively protested against gay marriage becoming legal – but it isn’t something I actively support or necessarily agree with either.” Later that night I was scrolling through Facebook, and came across some articles that had been shared about the legalisation of gay marriage. I read the comments and on the contrary to the civil discussion that Jamie and I had had (our views were very different) and the friendly conversation he had relayed to me between himself, Ben and Neil, many of the comments were full of vitriol and hatred between people strongly for and strongly against gay marriage. That got me thinking, I wonder if those people on either side weren’t behind a keyboard but were face to face over a coffee instead, would they react differently? Would it be different if they got to know the person a little more before knowing their opinion on something? Social media has given us an avenue to express and argue. It less often gives us an avenue to build new relationships or to just sit down and have a conversation about our differences with a fellow human being. It’s very easy to read an inflammatory comment from a stranger and bite. We don’t know the person on the other side of the keyboard. We don’t know their background or their upbringing, we haven’t walked in their shoes nor have they walked in ours. Does social media and talking online make us see the person on the other side of the comment as less human, easier to attack and degrade, and would that change if we were sat face to face? I’m the parent of a disabled child. I recently got called out on a social media page aimed at parents of children with disabilities, for using the term ‘disabled’. I was shocked. My son is in a wheelchair, he can’t walk and has learning difficulties all of which stem from a medical condition. He is classed as ‘disabled’ in the literature of his ‘Disability Living Allowance’ paperwork and his EHCP which he needed to be able to attend the local special education school. I

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didn’t use the term in a derogatory manner – I just stated that he is disabled within a comment about my disappointment at the lack of Changing Places Toilets (large toilets with specialist equipment such as a hoist and a changing bench inside) in our area. The anger I received from a couple of fellow parents on the page for using the term disabled was upsetting “I wonder if those people on either side weren’t at first. I didn’t – and behind a keyboard but were face to face over a still don’t – think that the term ‘disabled’ coffee instead, would they react differently?” is a bad one, as with the majority of people I think. And whilst fighting for a better, more inclusive world I don’t speak for all parents in a similar where my son is accepted for who he is and situation to myself, I also tend not to be can do more with what he is able to do is – offended when people flippantly use far for instance I’ve began discussing with the worse words – someone jokingly calling council about installing some wheelchair another person ‘retarded’ or ‘special needs’ friendly play equipment in our local park so for instance if they make a mistake – I he can enjoy our time there as much as his can see why it upsets some people, and brother and sister do, I’ve written to local it’s certainly not language I would use or companies and our MP asking them to encourage, and I may even explain to that consider installing Changing Places Toilets person who said it why it’s not a great term so that he and more people who need them to use if the situation is right – but I don’t can visit and enjoy local attractions, I will automatically assume that that person is an speak to restaurants and cafes and play areas inherently bad person for saying it. I don’t who have terrible wheelchair access and change or base my opinion on them solely explain how vital it is that they do their from one passing comment that is quite upmost to rectify it – these things I think obviously meant as a joke, even if it isn’t a are far more important than letting myself very funny or well thought out one. get stressed over a word we use to describe somebody’s ability. The parents that commented on my use of the word ‘disabled’ said it was offensive. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t stick up One said that I should be ashamed of for what we believe in. I’m not saying calling my son disabled and implied that I we shouldn’t speak up if we see or hear was a bad parent for it. That I should say something that is directly hurtful or he is ‘differently abled’ and that I shouldn’t malicious to another person. I’m not saying make him think he is incapable of doing that fighting for equality, civil rights, human certain things. They told me I would cause rights isn’t important, but what I do believe him more problems, make him feel isolated, is that we are rarely having productive by using that term in front of him and conversations about the bigger issues on calling him disabled. The thing with this social media. Instead, we seem to spend though, as well-meaning as I think their time squabbling over petty comments from ethos probably is, is that he is disabled. strangers that we don’t know and being He is different to most ‘typical’ 8 year old ‘offended’ at the brand name of tissues. boys. There are many things that do make I’m also not saying that the little fights him different, and as much as I wish there and victories aren’t important too, but do weren’t and that he could run and play we need to take a step back, maybe stop the same as most other children his age, being so sensitive and focus the power we he can’t. I personally think it’s important have to make changes to the world on the that he realises his strengths as well as bigger problems we face as a society? Just a recognising that there are things he can’t thought. do so well, things that he may never be able to do. I would rather put my energy into 21

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NORTH MILITARY CATCHMENT

Experience The Power of Ice

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New year, New you, New wardrobe

It takes a person three seconds to form an impression of you. So what we wear matters. Clothes affect the way we feel about ourselves. Having a carefully curated wardrobe offers so many benefits, feeling empowered from the moment you wake up and get dressed is one of the most obvious. One of the lesser known impacts of knowing your personal style is that it can help save the planet! Many of us don’t think about the resources required to make our clothes. It takes 2,700 litres of water to produce the cotton needed to make a single t-shirt. To put that into

perspective one load of washing uses 40 gallons of water. By simply extending the use of our clothes by just nine months we could save £5 billion in resources used to supply, launder and dispose of clothing. Despite the majority of women only wearing 20% of their wardrobe 80% of the time, we continue to ‘shop’ for more things than we need. We spend on average £1042 per year on clothes according to the Great British Wardrobe Report (but I would argue it’s more). Right now it’s estimated that us Brits have over £5.4bn of unworn clothing hiding in our homes, most of which is likely to be the wrong shape, size or colour. Given the facts about fashion, and that knowing your personal style can bring about so many positives to your

life and the planet, it certainly raises the stakes in making it a priority. It will keep your wardrobe streamlined, outfit mishaps minimised - and you’ll never say “I have nothing to wear” again despite having a wardrobe full of clothes. What a great new year’s resolution! Imagine that...no more wardrobe rage or outfit meltdowns. Before getting started with a new wardrobe: 1 Get clarity on what shapes are best for your body type 2 Understand what colours are best for your complexion 3 Define your signature style. If you would like to make a new year’s resolution to work on your wardrobe, feel free to email me at: info@robertastylelee.co.uk with any questions about getting started.

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When we think of bullying, our minds often turn to thoughts of school playgrounds. But bullying can be a problem for adults too…

WORKPLACE

BULLYING

* name has been changed

It’s Not Just Childs Play…

hilst we’d like to think that bullying is confined to the young and naïve minds of schoolkids, a surprising amount of adults report feeling bullied at work, home, the gym or other community places, or even within adult friend groups. Studies have shown that more than 40% of workers in the UK have felt bullied or undermined in the workplace at some point, and 90% of these were women – sadly often reporting that it was another woman or group of women who made them feel that way.

Why do people bully? Bullying is usually the result of a persons need to obtain and feel control over another person – whether that be through emotional control or physical control. The most common workplace bullying is through emotional control. It can be obvious, through argument and rudeness, but it can be - and more often is - subtle. Excluding and ignoring people and their 32

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contribution to the team, unnecessary criticism over their work, and overloading people with work are all forms of bullying. It can also take the form of being picked on, undermined or denied training or promotion opportunities, as well as having malicious rumours started about someone. Bullying and harassment can happen face to face, by email, phone or letter, and is classed as behaviour that makes someone feel intimidated or offended. Harassment is unlawful under the Equality Act 2010 and is taken very seriously. Bullying itself is not against the law, but harassment is. This is when the unwanted behaviour is related to one of the following: •age •sex •disability •gender reassignment •marriage and civil partnership •pregnancy and maternity •race •religion or belief •sexual orientation

In 2017 Jane* started to be on the receiving end of workplace bullying… “I worked for a large shipping company in Bristol and I’d been there for 5 years before I got promoted and my problems began.” She told us. “I’d always gotten on well with my colleagues; I was liked well enough and felt like part of the team. But I moved departments and the dynamic of the group was a lot different to the one I had been in previously. I moved from a small administration department which was made up of me and two others, to the accounts department which was me and 5 other women and was in a completely different part of the building. We were all of a roughly similar age, between 25 and 35 – me being 32 at the time, a year older than my manager, and to begin with things were fine. I’d get invited out to lunch with them and even on the odd evening out away from work. But as the months went on I started to be on the receiving end of nit-picking about my work from my manager, although when others made the same trivial mistakes

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Photo posed by models my work, and because even though 99% of my work was fine I was never praised or thanked when I went out of my way to do extra. I was having more and more sick days and a lot of it was down to stress. “The final straw was when a co-worker left her phone on my desk by accident and notifications started popping up with nasty messages about me in a group chat they were having between themselves whilst I was sitting there minding my own business. I hid in the toilets for 20 minutes in tears, wondering what I’d done to deserve it all. I then told my manager I’d been sick and needed to go home, before calling in the next day and saying that I wouldn’t be coming back. I didn’t give an explanation as to why not. I couldn’t even face working my notice.

it would be laughed off or not bought up at all. She would belittle me in front of everybody else and make sly comments about what I was wearing or how my hair looked. None of the others in the team stuck up for me and went along with it. “I was given almost double the amount of work than that of my colleagues, and would often work through my lunch or eat at my desk in order to get it done whilst they all went to the local café together or took long cigarette breaks. I’d sit and listen to them talk at length about nights out they had together and hikes they’d go on at the weekends but I was no longer invited along – I didn’t mind this so much, I have a friend group outside of work – it was more hurtful because they used to invite me and then seemed to flaunt it in front of me when they did get together outside of work hours, as if to make a point that I hadn’t been invited. If I tried to join in with their conversations they’d go silent or give me short answers. I still don’t know why they were like it, the only thing I could think at the time was that my manager didn’t like that I’d been headhunted within the company by someone above her to join their team, but she was nice to begin with so I’m not sure.” Jane eventually quit and found a new job after a year of being bullied. “It ended up getting to the point where I felt so ostracized that I was dreading getting up to go into work in the mornings. I lost all faith in myself in how competent I was at my job from the constant nit-picking over

“Looking back, I should have gone to HR and made official complaints against them and raised my concerns in the beginning, but it was so difficult when I felt so alone. I felt like it was 5 against 1. I was also embarrassed - I used to think ‘You’re 32, you shouldn’t be feeling bullied! Stop being so sensitive!’ and thought that people would laugh at me. I’d start second guessing everything – wondering if it actually was me that was the problem and whether most of it was in my head. It’s only since I left and have spoken out about it that I realise just how common it is, and 9 times out of 10 the person I’m speaking to about my experiences can reflect them with some of their own.” The important thing to remember with bullies is that you are not responsible for their behaviour. Adult bullies act out for the same reasons that child bullies do; they’re usually trying to make up for some shortcoming of their own. They are trying to make up for a lack of power or control that they are missing in their own lives – making you feel small makes them feel big. You’re not the one with the problem, so you shouldn’t ever take bullying personally, as hard as that may be. Bullies don’t always pick on the weak, as we are led to believe in most things we see, hear and read about bullying, so don’t misinterpret them bullying you as something being wrong with you, it’s more likely the complete opposite. Sometimes a person's strengths can make the bully feel threatened, and that triggers their behaviour so they can build themselves up and make themselves feel more powerful. They could be jealous of your family or home life, or they’re frustrated that they don’t have the kind of

personal relationships you have. They might feel threatened by your talent or ability, or hate the fact that your career is progressing and they’re stuck. None of this gives them any right to bully or belittle you, but it’s worth bearing in mind instead of thinking you are being bullied because of anything you have done wrong or thinking it’s because you are weak or an easy target.

What can we do about adult bullies? If you are being harassed or bullied in the workplace the best thing to do is find an ally and raise your concerns with your manager or supervisor, HR department or trade union official. Don't be ashamed to tell people what's going on. Bullying is serious, and you need to let people know what's happening so they can help you. By sharing your experiences you may discover that it's happening to other people too. Some employers have specially trained staff to help with bullying and harassment problems. They're sometimes called "harassment advisers". If the bullying is affecting your health, visit your GP. Sometimes just talking to the bully is all that is needed to put an end to it all. Bullying is sometimes not deliberate – and talking to the person about how their actions are making you feel can be enough to stop it continuing. Bullies that are deliberately cruel and know what they are doing will often back down when they are confronted; just remember to stay calm and polite when you do call them out on their behaviour. Work out what to say beforehand and describe what's been happening and why you object to it. If talking doesn’t cut it, take the next step and make a formal complaint; to do this you must follow your employer’s grievance process. If this still isn’t enough, legal action can be taken, which may mean going to an employment tribunal.You would need to get professional advice before taking this step, and if you see someone being bullied – speak out. Stick up for the person on the receiving end and show them your support. Bullies will often retreat when they see that others have noticed and object to their behaviour. If you need help with workplace bullying, or need someone to talk to, please check out these websites: www.acas.org.uk https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk www.equalityhumanrights.com www.samaritans.org 33

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If you’ve been following YourHomePatch’s journey, you’ll know what we are all about and you might even be chomping at the bit to see your patch up and ready! Our latest mission is to be totally Tri-Service, but before I get on to that, here is a little reminder about what we do and where the idea of YourHomePatch came from…

feel incredibly lucky to be part of the military community; I’m surrounded by resilient and inspiring spouses, with incredible senses of humour and a “get on with it” attitude. Sharing pride in what our partners do is amazing and I wouldn’t change our Forces life for anything. During 5 years of living apart and the following 2 years together in England, I have found huge comfort and strength in the military community and have really thrown myself into the social aspects of mess and patch life…and it was here that I found the inspiration for YourHomePatch.

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Do you live in Brize Norton or Portsmouth? I’d love to hear from you as I’m hoping to set up your pages next! YourHomePatch brings together all the best information about your patch into one handy site, and as such, helps forces families settle into their new posting quicker. It lists local recommended businesses and services as well as offering easyaccess to information about your camp, the med centre, those essential numbers like the Guardroom and Welfare, as well as a calendar of camp events. I want it to be the directory of patch life, the “Google of the Garrison” if you will! The feedback so far has been incredibly positive; the only negative being that I’ve not launched in every area yet! The plan is to cover every military posting in the UK and abroad because a girl’s got to dream big, right?! All the recommendations come from people who live in that patch, not from advertising, so it’s 100% authentic, grassroots stuff! YourHomePatch won’t exist though without your help, so please get in touch. Do you live in Brize Norton or

Portsmouth? I’d love to hear from you as I’m hoping to set up your pages next! Email me at natalie@yourhomepatch.co.uk and help your community grow and thrive! So please, check out the site, create your free membership, and I’ll let you know when your patch is launched. See you there!

www.yourhomepatch.co.uk natalie@yourhomepatch.co.uk @YourHomePatch @yourhomepatch @yourhomepatch

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SEXUAL HARASSMENT Something significant happened when sexual abuse allegations against film producer Harvey Weinstein began emerging in 2017. The floodgates opened and women, in their droves, began admitting to similar experiencesâ&#x20AC;Ś

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omen began talking to the press, to social media followers, to each other about sexual harassment. They began calling it out. Men who had experienced similar things did the same. They made it very clear that sexual abuse or harassment on any level was not acceptable. For Miranda* the Weinstein Effect and #metoo campaign got her thinking about events which happened to her when she joined the armed forces back in the late 1990s. Indeed, it made her start to question events which she had filed away as innocent but which had always made her feel slightly uneasy.

*name and some details changed to protect anonymity “When we are young we think we are invincible and I certainly felt that nothing bad could have happened,” she said. “But now, looking back from my position as a mum, I realise I was very vulnerable. I would be devastated if my daughters had to go through that.” Miranda said she had female friends in the armed forces who experienced worse. One woman she knew was shocked when one of her superiors exposed himself to her. Meanwhile, another was propositioned by a senior officer at a ball. He grabbed her bottom and said he had been thinking of having sex with her. He also bombarded her with text messages in the days following the event. To make matters worse, his wife had actually been in attendance at the ball itself.

As a new recruit of just 19 years old, she joined What worries Miranda is that by not calling out up having followed in the footsteps of her “At the time I didn’t the behaviour of her colleagues when she did, Dad and an older cousin. Smart, enthusiastic think anything of she was almost giving her ‘approval’ of what they and ready to start a career in a technical job, it, but now I look back, were doing. She explained: “I do wonder if they Miranda sailed through her basic training and continued to treat women it that way, or worse. was posted to a location, far from family, in the and especially after I wish I had said something at the time. I had an UK. Although she made a few friends, as one of hearing stories from opportunity to let them know what they were only a few women she socialised mainly with other women on doing was unacceptable. But I didn’t because I men. “I didn’t mind,” she said, “I have brothers social media recently, I was naive. But I also think things were different and a good relationship with my Dad, plus I realise what happened then. We just sort of accepted that behaviour.” went to co-ed schools so being outnumbered wasn’t a big problem at first.” Indeed, this was was actually sexual According to a report published this year by the era of so-called Ladette Culture and Miranda harassment.” the British Army, sexual harassment could be felt confident that she could fit in with the defined as ‘unwanted verbal, non-verbal or boys easily. “I drunk pints and was very sporty physical conduct of a sexual nature which has the purpose or effect and I gave as good as I got when it came to banter so I wasn’t of violating the recipient’s dignity, or of creating an intimidating, intimidated,” she admits. hostile, degrading, humiliating or offensive environment for the recipient’. It points out that people will have different opinions In fact, it’s because she fitted in so well and developed techniques over what it ‘sexual harassment’ actually constitutes. However, it says to deal with the lads sometimes vulgar and coarse behaviour that incidents could be targeted – aimed at specific person - or general. she thinks she probably dismissed it as innocent. “At the time I didn’t think anything of it,” she told us, “but now I look back, and The army’s study discovered nine out ten service personnel especially after hearing stories from other women on social media questioned had been told sexual jokes or stories – which is recently, I realise what happened was actually sexual harassment.” considered a ‘general’ incident. Service women, it found, were more likely than service men to be offended. Interestingly, it found, So what did happen? Miranda is very quick to say that what men and women were almost equally responsible for these jokes. she experienced is not as bad as some women would have been When it came to targeted incidents the investigation found 8% of through. Indeed she says, discussions with even her close friends servicemen and 21% of servicewomen had either experienced or brought up stories which made hers pale into insignificance. observed sexual harassment at work in the last 12 months. However, she still feels ashamed she didn’t call out what happened to her. “I remember there were a couple of lads who used to think The study made comparisons to an earlier survey carried out in it was funny to tease me – throw paper planes in class and hold up 2015 and it revealed, in general, incidents of sexual harassment had signs ‘scoring’ me out of ten when I walked in. Sometimes they reduced during that time. However, what hadn’t changed was that would comment on my breasts or comment on my clothes being junior ranking female personnel were most likely to experience too tight. unwanted targeted sexualised behaviours. There was also a real reluctance to report these incidents, the report found. However, “It’s absolutely puerile and I am embarrassed to say I used to numbers reporting incidents had gone up since 2015. Most either laugh at them. I even felt a bit flattered if I got a ‘nine’.” But things thought they could handle the harassment themselves or they didn’t developed. The group would organise regular nights out and think their complaint would be taken seriously. before one particular evening event the blokes seemed a bit more overexcited and spirited than usual. “They kept having banter Whatever your views on what exactly sexual harassment is, it’s that didn’t involve me and then one admitted they were having a clearly something which divides people. There are some who might competition to see who could pull me. He actually said that if I class what happened to Miranda as harmless banter and others who went back with him that night he would appreciate it as he would are offended. Miranda thinks there’s a line which is crossed and only win the bet.” an individual can know where that line is located. She said: “I think, if you feel uneasy then say something – whether you speak to a Miranda said there were lots of other similar, low level incidents. friend to discuss the matter, report it to your senior or even shout These events, she explained, were not enough at the time to ring at the perpetrator and tell them to ‘stop’. Whatever you do, listen to alarm bells or warrant what she thought was a complaint but she your feelings – if it feels wrong, it probably is.” admits to feeling uncomfortable and also ‘singled out’ at the time. 37

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The Ripple Pond The Ripple Pond is a self-help peer support network for the adult family members of physically and emotionally injured service personnel and veterans.

e are not a crisis organisation and do not offer therapy or direct professional intervention. The emphasis is on meeting others in a face-toface situation (where possible), to give and receive support from those who are walking a similar journey to yourself. The Ripple Pond was established in 2011 by Julia Molony and Sue Hawkins, both of them Mothers to physically injured soldiers. They each individually reached out in a time when their lives were changing forever and found little in the way of support for the parents of the injured. Realising if they were in this position others would be to, they formed The Ripple Pond. The very act of being heard, acknowledged and accepted is hugely cathartic, talking about a situation might not change it but it can help a person to find a way through, and knowing they’re not alone in their struggles can be a huge relief. We have 3 avenues of support, the main being our group meetings. These are kept small with a maximum of 6 in any one group. This ensures everyone has the opportunity to share and be heard. We try to run them monthly depending on the

groups needs and are facilitated by a Group Administrator (who is a member of The Ripple Pond). We also have a ‘buddy’ system whereby we put members in touch with one another, so regardless of whether there is a meeting in their area, they can still access that face-toface support. We have a private Facebook page too. This is a judgement free area where members can share their stories, celebrate a good day or commiserate after a bad day, regardless of time. There will always be someone around to comment and support. The Ripple Pond currently has 23 groups set up across the country with the potential for more. All we need to organise a group is a venue and more than 2 members wanting to meet. We have members spreading from the North of Scotland to Cornwall, and Wales to Norfolk. The Ripple Pond has 5 members of staff based in the Hub in Aldershot. We have recently been awarded over £24,000 from The Army Benevolent fund; this generous funding will continue to support and facilitate Military families around the UK, who are living alongside their loves ones’ combat injuries.

Forces families often do not recognise the underlying stress they cope with. Helping a loved one with an injury is unique and personal. The Ripple Pond sets out to support the silent party of trauma in the military, the family members who live alongside it who are trying to make sense of it. If you are caring for a loved one with a military attributed injury – remember to take care of yourself too. To find out more go to www.theripplepond.org. Facebook and Twitter @theripplepond

We are thrilled that The Ripple Pond has been announced as a Soldiering On Awards ﬁnalist in the Family Values award category. This is a result of so much hard work by the team both past and present along with the fantastic and ongoing support from our members and fellow military charities. Now in their 9th year, the Soldiering On Awards recognise many truly inspirational people and teams; highlighting the outstanding achievements of current and former service men and women, their families and all those who support the Armed Forces Community. The awards will be held on the 5th April in London

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Her Just for e th d e nch r we lau group Last yea cebook a F b lu ives, Book C ilitary w m g n ti c onne ervice ope of c female s in the h d n a y il ds, fam port, girlfrien r for sup e th e g to el and personn reading n fu e m ave so th! and to h ch mon a e k o o gab discussin n each iscussio d e th g in in a y joinin nce to w a h AND b c a e o hav on us you als month ths read n o m t the nex for?! copy of waiting u o y e r ta - so wha

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If you’d like to join in with the next read, simply search for Just for Her Book Club on Facebook and join the group! We look forward to seeing you there! 40

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Would you like to see your article published? Just for Her is looking for interesting and relevant articles about the Service community… If you have something you have written, ideally with pictures too, then please send your articles in to justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk.

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The East Anglian Game & Country Fair will take place on Saturday 27th & Sunday 28th April 2019 at the prestigious Euston Estate, near Thetford, by kind permission of The Duke and Duchess of Grafton…

e welcome world class events and attractions to the show each year. Headlining the event this year are The Silver Stars Army Parachute Display Team, don’t miss this spectacular sight at the drop zone in the Main Arena with the beautiful backdrop of Euston Hall. Returning by popular demand are equestrian sensations The UK Horseboarding Team UK, The British Scurry & Trials Driving Championships, Harvey’s Heavy Horses and The Suffolk Hunt. Other main arena events include Ye Olde Redtail Falconry Display, who bring the ancient art of Falconry to the modern age, with a comprehensive and thrilling display, that is guaranteed to thrill audiences of all ages. Watch it, be amazed, and join in. World and European Casting Champion, Hywel Morgan will be entertaining crowds with a relaxed

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and humorous demo about the fascinating world of fly fishing. Alongside the Fishing4Schools team, Hywel will also offer ‘have a go’ fly tying and casting tuition and demos on the Black Bourne River. Don’t miss the 2019 Forestry Arena. The Thomas Carving Timber show will Showcase how lumberjacks ply their trade and the fun they have doing it – a new unique show. Watch Log Rolling in a tank of water with the aim to stay dry and upright on the log, Speed Carving, 15ft Gas Cannon, Axe Throwing and abseiling. See competitors climb the highest poles ever seen at the East Anglian Game & Country Fair. There will also be interactive workshop sessions for children in between performances. Also new to the 2019 Forestry Arena are Europe’s leading BMX stunt team Mobile Bike Events. With a selection of the world’s best riders performing a jaw-dropping stunt bonanza and backflips guaranteed! Join in and ‘have a go’ at a range of country activities from clay shooting with John Bidwell’s High Lodge instructors or enter the 40-bird re-entry shooting competition for men, women and juniors. Fly fishing and Coarse fishing on the Black Bourne River, ferret racing and archery to paintballing and crossbows. Try the air rifle range, hold a bird of prey, enter your dog into the pet dog show, join in with your dog at the K9 Aqua Sports pool or gun dog scurry competitions and take a ride in a Landrover on the exciting off road 4x4 course. Children of all ages will be able to meet several animals, including alpacas and enjoy donkey rides. This year we are pleased to welcome back ‘Little Rovers’. Under supervision, adventurous youngsters can

drive scaled Land Rovers around a mini ‘off-road’ course. You can also learn much more about the countryside by visiting some of our countryside organisation stands including BASC, British Deer Society, Game & Wildlife Conservation Trust, National Organisation of Beaters, National Gamekeepers Organisation and many more. There are over 350 shopping stands with a wide variety of products from fashion and footwear to gun makers & fishing products. Children’s activities, food hall, craft and gift marquees and much more. Feast Norfolk and Andy Newman will be hosting our 2019 Game Fair Country Kitchen with a great line-up of cookery workshops and demonstrations taking place over the weekend. Award winning chef ’s and suppliers from across Norfolk and Suffolk will be showcasing their signature

dishes using seasonal, local produce. Have breakfast, lunch or dinner at one of the new street food pop-ups and stay on to enjoy the evening bar and live music. We are excited to announce Bill Downs will be performing at the show next year. Since appearing on The Voice UK in 2012, Bill has performed his show across the UK and Europe astounding audiences with his unique and exciting approach to his show. Bill also appeared on the X Factor in 2017 performing to a packed Wembley arena, where he received a standing ovation for his bootcamp performance that took him through to the 6-chair challenge. Ticket Information: Purchase tickets online at www.ukgamefair. co.uk or by calling the ticket hotline number 01263 735 828. Save up to 25% when booking in advance and weekend camping tickets are also available.

Win Tickets…! Just for Her has teamed up with THE EAST ANGLIAN GAME & COUNTRY FAIR to give away 10 family tickets! To be in with a chance of winning these fabulous tickets email competitions@ forcespublishing.co.uk or write to us at Forces & Corporate Publishing Ltd, Hamblin House, Hamblin Court, Rushden, Northamptonshire NN10 0RU with your name, address and phone number. So what are you waiting for? Send your entry today! Closing date: Friday 25th March 2019 45

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ON THE

RUN The beneﬁts of running

can be summed up by a series of F words – Fun, Friendship, Feeling good, Fitness, Fat-loss, and it’s often free. Yet so many women say they can’t run or they hate running. But anyone can run…

ou just need a pair of trainers, a good bra and the right inspiration to get started. As a military wife for the past 21 years, running has helped me through the challenges of military life from frequent moves to long deployments. Now as a runner-turned-coach my ambition is to share my enthusiasm and inspire more women to take up running - from those who’ve never run before, to those who run occasionally and would like to get faster but would never dream of joining a club, running with a group or working with a running coach. I love running and thanks to my husband’s first posting to RAF Henlow all those years ago I’ve gained more from it than most. Moving into married quarters for the first time, I joined the local athletics club to make friends and keep running. That was the start of my longstanding and highly successful runner-coach partnership with Alex Stanton, which has continued ever since despite all our moves. Under his guidance I went on to represent England and Great Britain at events such as the Commonwealth Games, European Championships and the elite start of London Marathon. These days I still love

to run but my running is no longer at that level and my focus has moved from running to coaching. As well as my formal training as a fully qualified British Athletics Coach, I also bring all the knowledge and experience from my own running career to my coaching, whether it’s working with aspiring elite athletes or women starting running for the first time.

Representing Great Britain in the marathon in the 2010 European Championships Photo by Mark Shearman - Athletics Images

So how do you get started if you have never run before or you’ve tried running but hated it? Many beginners are put off as they perceive running as too hard and definitely not fun. There’s a number of common misconceptions about running –that you have to run as fast as you can all the time and “proper” runners don’t walk during a run. In truth all runners, even elite athletes, walk and run at different paces at different times during their so-called ‘runs’. Instead of setting off as fast as you can you should start at a comfortable pace even if it seems as slow as walking pace. An easy test is whether it’s “talking pace” – you should still be able to say a sentence of 7-8 words to the runner next to you. Then just gradually build up the length of time you can run continuously at that pace. There’s lots of “Couch to 5k” programmes that you can follow yourself but to really enjoy running find a group to run with. Running with others gives you much more motivation and mutual support. On a practical basis, running and chatting helps you to stick to the right pace as well as providing a useful distraction from how far you are running. When you’re starting out you are far more likely to run if

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there’s someone to run with and running becomes social not just torturously-worthy exercise. For the last few years I’ve coached numerous beginners groups as part of Run Together, an initiative led by England Athletics. It’s underpinning philosophy is that running and jogging should be for everyone and should be enjoyable. With over 2,000 running groups, Run Together provides an easy and friendly way to get started wherever you might live. To find out more about my Running Jo’s groups and other Run Together groups go to https:// groups.runtogether.co.uk/RunningJos and https://runtogether.co.uk/

What about if you already run regularly and would like to get better?

motivate yourself then sign up for one of the hundreds of races from 5k to marathon held each week. A race gives you a goal, Many women wrongly think they aren’t whether its to complete the distance or to fast enough to join a running club or run a new personal best. Contrary to what get a coach. The terms bandied about by you might think there’s a strong tradition experienced runners such as intervals, of mutual support and encouragement threshold, reps, tempos,VO2 max and amongst most runners in almost all races. recoveries can be daunting.Yet if you can If you don’t feel ready to take on a race, already run 5k or more then you are in then check out Parkrun instead. Parkruns the group of runners who benefit most are free, timed 5k runs held every Saturday from good running coaching. It sounds complicated but in simplistic terms, intervals at 09.00am at over 540 locations all over the UK.You don’t even have to run or refer to set distances or timed efforts of fast jog and can walk the whole way if you running that might last from 30 seconds up prefer. Runners at parkrun come in all to around 6 minutes. The general principle is that you run each interval faster than your shapes and sizes and all ages which means unlike most races, the whole family can steady pace, which builds your aerobic and take part together, even anaerobic fitness to run. with the baby in the It can be a challenge “With the ethos of pram and the dog on a though to get started on lead. As a family we’ve your own. Parkrun based as much been running Parkrun for on local community as several years and with our Getting a coach or healthy activity it is postings we are now on running with a group our third different local will introduce you great way for military Parkrun. We have found to different types of families like us who each one to be friendly sessions. A good coach move frequently to get to and welcoming and have will plan sessions that quickly got to know other are specifically targeted know people.” regulars. With the ethos towards you and your of Parkrun based as much current ability and on local community as healthy activity it is guide you on the pace to run, length of great way for military families like us who each interval, the amount of recovery. They move frequently to get to know people. Its will also advise you on technique and free and easy to register online and you can running-specific conditioning exercises too find your nearest Parkrun at http://www. which strengthens your legs and reduces parkrun.org.uk/ the risk of injury. By definition, running intervals is much harder than running at Despite my running background, as the a constant, steady pace. It’s not just the working mother of two children, with physical effort required but the mental a husband who’s often away, I know the effort to push yourself to run faster, but if challenges women face in getting involved you can make the effort then the sense of in sport and fitness on a regular basis as achievement and the improvement in your I’ve faced them myself. Frequent moves running can be huge. (21 years of marriage and soon to move to house number 14) mean the need to If you really want to enjoy running and

build a new childcare network in each new place. Long periods of separation on deployments just add to the challenge. Over the years I’ve begged, borrowed and bought favours to keep running and there’s been lots of reciprocal babysitting with friends whose husbands were also away. During one six-month deployment I repaid a friend for looking after my two children for my Sunday morning long runs by cooking roast dinner for her and her children each week until both our husbands were home. But I’ve not had to rely solely on military friends. The running community has a lot of similarities to the military community. Both friendly and welcoming with strong bonds formed quickly through the solidarity from shared experiences. There’s always another runner who will keep an eye on the children when I need in return for a similar favour and at races you often find a group of children watched over by a succession of parents as we all take turns to run. The old saying that the “hardest step is the first one out the front door” is so true but there’s a whole running community out there to support you if you know how to find them. I love running, and now as a coach I can share not only my knowledge and experience, but more importantly, my enthusiasm, enjoyment and a fundamental belief that anyone can run.You just need to put on your trainers and take that first step. I love running and, even more, I love the satisfaction of seeing someone run further or faster than they thought they could. And I love to hear those who have vehemently declared that they hated running, admit that now even they love running too. Follow me @runningjo10k on Instagram or Twitter to hear more about my running and coaching. To find out more about my running coaching support packages, how I can help you to run or my running groups email me on runningjocoaching@gmail.com

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A Beginners Guide To Lifestyle Change - The first steps towards a more fulfilled existence... self esteem, it provides an opportunity for personal growth, it offers adventure, a way to socialise, to make new friends, and can bring the collective together;. You may already be aware you’d like to make some change, but are you clear on WHAT you’d like to change and WHY?

lifestyle is ‘a way of living – the living conditions, behaviour and habits preferred by you’. What you eat, drink and do, influences how you think, feel and behave and vice versa! So to think good thoughts, feel good feelings and behave in a beneficial way, we need to make the best choices for ourselves, nourish through our diet, move in ways that serve us and live mindfully, with awareness. This is why we at Camberry believe optimum body & mind health is at the heart of maintaining a sense of self, and ultimately in living a truly rewarding, meaningful life. The opportunities it offers are boundless! Making the decision to improve your health can truly enhance your life - the journey in itself builds confidence, boosts

We all have different reasons for desiring lifestyle change, for many it is often about weight loss, but for long term weight management this usually isn’t enough to keep us motivated. So although we all certainly want to look and feel our best, it is useful to identify other motivators for lifestyle change; • Would you like to get fitter this year? • Would you like to feel less stressed? • Do you simply want to eat more healthily? • Perhaps you’d like to re-balance work & life (in favour of life clearly!) Whatever you’d like to change, in the context and circumstance of our lives, we also need to be realistic and not set ourselves up to fall. Too often we can set impossible standards and feel disheartened when we don’t quite meet them, often leading to quite a negative mindset and a yoyo cycle – sound familiar? The new habits, routines and behaviours that are essential to realising the change you desire need to be workable!

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On that note and being completely honest, bedding in your new habits takes TIME. You’ve probably spent 20/30 years or more picking up your current habits, but with patience and persistence, you’ll make headway in liberating yourself from those that don’t serve you and developing those that do.

Be the change you wish to see Live your best life

The first steps towards making change - set your goals! Setting aside some time, it can be a useful exercise to ask yourself the questions below. Prioritise yourself – no one else is going to do it for you! 1. THE GOAL - What do you want? (What’s the dream?) 2. THE DRIVER - Why do you want it (how would you feel if you achieve it?)

Next, with your answer to question 1 – add a time frame. e.g I will run a half marathon by the end of 2019. This isn’t ‘one day’ or ‘tomorrow’ - make a committed statement. Once you have this, you can then:

3. BREAK YOUR LONG TERM GOAL DOWN INTO STEPS (SMALLER GOALS) - e.g. run 1km, build to 3 km, then take part in a 5km park run and so on. Be realistic and set attainable goals… 4. ADD A TIMELINE e.g. run 1km by….3km by…and so on 5. DEVELOP A CLEAR ACTION PLAN (HOW) – e.g. start to run/jog 2 times per week for the next month and reach 1km. 6. REVIEW AS YOU GO & RE-SET It’s important to review and keep track in order to stay motivated – you notice your progress this way. Do you ever step back and reflect? Would you consider keeping a journal or calendar to tick off your successes? There are plenty of ready-made journals out there to purchase. As you realise your goals, you will need to review, update and re-set, this is a continuous process. 7. REWARD SUCCESS Acknowledge your efforts, progress, wins, however small and reward your success. When you plan your ‘how to’ section – consider what your rewards will be for completing each smaller goal. Make them relevant. e.g. if you’re trying to lose weight, don’t reward yourself with cake! Find something else, a new pair of weights gloves, a funky ear buff – to keep you warm & feeling confident while out running. This might seem like a long-winded process, but being specific makes it so much easier for you to visualise, plan, stay motivated and on-track.

About Cathryn & Camberry Understanding fully the stresses of modern life, with her career culminating in a directorship for a financial services firm in Hong Kong and relying on her 6 years of experience as a qualified yoga instructor, Cathryn wanted to create an experience dedicated to inspiring, motivating and supporting individuals transform themselves from the inside out. Further qualifying as a personal trainer, lifestyle & motivation coach in 2017, Camberry was launched. Camberry offers personalised and small group retreats, lifestyle coaching packages and yoga. Whether your goals are fitness, lifestyle or health related, our approach is individually tailored to suit each client’s needs. With 3 fundamental principles at its heart; YOGA & MINDFULNESS, FITNESS & REAL FOOD NUTRITION - interwoven with GREEN LIVING, – Camberry supports and guides clients as they re-connect with nature, become more active and for those that desire it, regain self-esteem and self-empowerment GETTING YOU BACK TO YOU. Relocating to the Tidworth/Bulford area in the new year, Cathryn welcomes anyone to get in touch or to follow Camberry on Instagram/Facebook if they’d like to know more about the local offering or to receive ideas on how to improve their general wellbeing - from fitness & weight loss, to mindfulness, yoga, recipes and nutrition.

Facebook/Instagram/ Twitter camberry.life www.camberry.life * 10% Military Discount for 2019 retreats, please quote the code GMBTM19 when booking

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SOUTH EAST MILITARY CATCHMENT

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HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH? ARE YOU READY TO TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE WITH AN AWARD WINNING METHOD THAT WORKS? RAPID TRANSFORMATION THERAPY Claire Linturn: www.creativecoachingtherapy.co.uk creativecoaching@outlook.com| 07786 004371 Allow me to take you on a journey to unshakable self belief, unwavering confidence, trust in your own ability to deal with any situation and give you the freedom to lead the life you deserve.

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We are delighted to be able to show you our selec on of special hearts, le er bun ng and family bun ng. All the bun ng will be unique to YOU just order what you want and it will be posted to you already strung. Everything is designed and made by a small family company situated in the UK and we are very proud to be selling this to you. Ceramic hearts and bun ng - bought and sold with love

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Are you TIRED of feeling DAMAGED, BROKEN, LOST and ANGRY? Tired of being told to TALK about it when all you want is to DO something about it? Change YOUR LIFE in 1 day, starting with a free, proven Integrated Wellbeing session - talking optional. Call Candice on 079 999 02358

NOW and never be the same.

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*Limited sessions available, first come first served basis.

anet Brown Reiki Master

• Counselling. All ages.

Jacquelyn Clarke and

“Reiki is great for any age - from childhood to the end of

• Hypnotherapy.

life. It supports, comforts and calms. It is my mission to bring Reiki to everyone and anyone can learn it.”

• Anxiety issues

her team at magnolia house therapy.

A Reiki Master of long standing, Janet Brown has been teaching Reiki for more than 20 years. A member of The Reiki Association, Janet is also a Verified Practitioner. Janet lives in Wadhurst in East Sussex where she does treatments and teaches. She is willing to travel to teach and give talks where ever called. You can contact Janet on 07756-565022 or reikiscot@gmail.com

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• Bereavement

Helping yo move you where you want to be. • Coaching. Life and all issues.

• Reiki healing. And teaching.

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SOUTH EAST MILITARY CATCHMENT

REIKI HEALING

bringing you inner

CALM, PEACE OF MIND AND

positivity into your daily life Tricia Dance Dip.Med.Teacher Level 2 Reiki Practitioner

Accredited by the SFTR - National UK Therapists Register

T: 07876204713 E: triciadance7@yahoo.com Reiki Healing and Meditation

Mama Gin is a mobile cocktail bar with an emphasis on Gin, with all drinks available, including draught beer and cider. Mama Gin creates bespoke menus for each and every event offering custom cocktails for birthdays and parties, his and hers cocktails for weddings. With plenty of boutique gins you would have never tried before. We believe in supporting local businesses to where we are and where the event takes place with all the products we purchase, even the fruit from our local greengrocer. Mama Gin is based in Brighton, but covers the whole country with previous events including; The Royal Wedding, Creamfield’s Festival, The South of England Show, Various Concerts, Race Days, Dog Shows, Weddings and Private Events. We also offer Gin Tastings for smaller more intimate events, perfect for Birthdays, Hen Do’s and Corporate Events. Mama Gin’s gorgeous 1971 fully converted Citroen Hy Horse-box Bar is always a talking point at every event and really does bring that classy and fun feeling. We have our rustic static bar made out of crates and gorgeous wooden boarding to create a unique custom-made bar, available for indoor events. With another Horse-Box Bar in production at the moment, which will be available post May 2019.

If you would like to enquire about a quote please do contact Eliot Rogers via email eliot.rogers@mamagin.co.uk or call on 07876031167. For menus and packages please head over to our website

www.mamagin.co.uk 51

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COil

As more and more places legalise its use, CBD oil, which is derived from the cannabis plant is becoming more and more popular.

Just for Her issue 20 2018.indd 52

n recent years, the number of CBD oil users in the UK has grown by an impressive amount and this has led to an increased interest in what it is and what it does. Anyone who’s familiar with cannabis oil will know that it’s a substance that is extracted from the cannabis plant itself, but not everyone knows where the UK stands on its use. The legality of CBD oil in the UK is something that’s been highly debated, with the exact laws proving to be confusing for most. Some people believe that it should be illegal, but many people think the opposite. In fact, there are entire organisations that were dedicated to legalising CBD oil consumption and these made a huge difference when CBD oil was made legal to purchase in 2016. Currently, CBD oil is legal throughout the UK as long as meets the criteria set by the government. Cannabis plants are made up of more than 100 different cannabinoids, which have different impacts on the body and are concentrated to different extents in certain parts of the plant. The most wellknown of these are tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) and cannabidiol (CBD). THC is the psychoactive cannabinoid - the one that recreational users use to get “high” and that is associated with the “addictive” feelings it produces when consumed. CBD does not have this effect, and in order for CBD oil to be legal it must contain a maximum THC content of 0.2%. CBD oil is not addictive as it is made from high CBD and low THC hemp plants. CBD does not stimulate the brains “pleasure hormone” dopamine system. Although CBD may contain a tiny amount of THC, it is not enough to get you high and won’t carry any sort of addiction risk. While almost all cannabinoids are controlled substances under the Misuse of Drugs Act, CBD is not. Suppliers in

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“

Whilst CBD doesn’t alter your state of mind like THC and isn’t psychoactive, it does appear to produce signiﬁcant changes in the body, with users claiming relief from a host of medical problems from arthritis, anxiety, inﬂammation and even epileptic seizures.

England and Wales have to obtain a licence to sell it as a medicine, following a decision made a few years ago, but manufacturers and retailers such as Holland and Barrett, who’s sales of CBD oil have surged in the last two years, are able to avoid the strict regulation by selling it as a food supplement - ignoring the lengthy process of gaining a medicinal licence.

So what does it do? Whilst CBD doesn’t alter your state of mind like THC and isn’t psychoactive, it does appear to produce significant changes in the body, with users claiming relief from a host of medical problems from arthritis, anxiety, inflammation and even epileptic seizures. Inside the human body we have different receptors spread throughout the brain and body that directly affect things. CBD activates certain receptors, like the vanilloid, adenosine and serotonin receptors. The activation of adenosine receptors by CBD gives the nutritive benefits of cannabidiol against symptoms of anxiety and inflammation. Adenosine receptors are also involved in the release of dopamine and glutamate, two neurotransmitters that play major roles inside the body. Dopamine is involved in cognition, motor control, motivation and reward mechanisms, while glutamate is one of the major mediators of excitatory signals, being involved in memory, learning and cognition. High concentrations of CBD have been shown to activate the serotonin receptor. The same receptor is involved in a series of processes from pain perception, appetite, nausea, anxiety and sleep mechanisms. The problem is scientific research and evidence collection is still ongoing, and CBD oils available for the public to buy – whilst being regulated by the government to some standard - are not regulated by medical standards and can vary widely in quality. What we do know from medical studies so far, and as far as CBD oil becoming a prescribed and medically regulated drug goes, is that the benefits of taking it are heading in a positive direction.

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Early in 2018, a U.S Food and Drug Administration advisory panel unanimously recommended approval of the CBD medication Epidiolex to treat two forms of childhood epilepsy (Dravet Syndrome and Lennox-Gastaut Syndrome which both have very high mortality rates) in America, and it is set to be available on prescription in the UK by mid 2019.

This isn’t to say that taking CBD oil that we can buy on the high street or online is of no benefit. At the end of 2017 the World Health Organisation revealed that it may successfully treat symptoms relating to Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinsons, MS, chronic pain such as back and joint pain, anxiety, depression, cancer and diabetic complications. CBD oil has been so successful that Holland & Barrett have launched further CBD oil products in the last year such as CBD gummies, bigger bottles of oil and capsules to help cater for the surge in popularity. We spoke to Charlie, who has used CBD oil for the last year, to hear her experience with using it to manage pain. When Charlie was 21 she was involved in a car accident that resulted in two broken legs, a crushed heel, a lengthy hospital stay and various operations over the course of 6 months where her legs were pinned. Whilst she felt lucky to have come away from the crash alive, and was eventually able to walk again, her pain levels never completely went away. “I had almost constant shooting pains and aches in both legs for a good few years, which did ease off a bit as time went on but never fully went away.” She told us. “I couldn’t walk very far without needing to rest or having the aches and pains start up.” “My GP prescribed Naproxen, an antiinflammatory, and opiates such as codeine to manage the pain. They worked, the pain subsided – but they did come with some undesirable side effects. Naproxen can have an adverse effect on your liver if taken for too long and codeine comes with a host of side effects and made me feel groggy to begin with. I eventually became addicted to it, needing more and more to manage the pain and get through each 53

day. I stopped taking it at one point, scared of how much I was relying on it, and the withdrawal was awful. That’s when I read about other pain management options and heard about CBD oil and decided it was worth a shot. Research into the medical benefits of CBD are still in their early stages but recently I read some research reports that actually suggest it could be a more useful anti-inflammatory than normal medicines such as Ibuprofen and Naproxen. It took a few weeks for it to build up in my system but I haven’t looked back since. I’ve been taking it for just over a year now and haven’t needed any prescription drugs in all that time. I like that CBD oil isn’t addictive, it’s completely natural and it’s easy to take. I haven’t personally experienced and negative side effects although I know some people do have bouts of diarrhoea when they first take it but this can usually be resolved with altering your dosage. The bottle of oil I buy comes with a dropper and it’s as simple and putting three drops under my tongue three times a day. The only downside for me is the price tag – it costs me £79.99 for a 1000mg 10ml bottle online which lasts me around a month. I’ve tried a few different brands and it’s the one that works best for me, and although it’s pricy I definitely think it’s worth it.You can get cheaper ones on the high street but for me the higher mg works better so I buy online. It’s given me my life back and eased so many of my worries about taking prescription medication and the concerns that come with them. I would recommend anyone to try it if they are feeling like other methods of pain relief aren’t working for them – there’s a host of information available about it and doing your research on different brands and the quality of what you’re buying is essential. Its helpful to speak to others who have had experience with taking it too. There’s a lot of misinformation out there - I’ve had many people assume I’m getting “high” by taking it - but that isn’t the case at all. It has completely changed my life for the better and I imagine in the future, with more research, it will become one of the most valuable and common drugs we use to manage pain and disease.”

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PROFILE

Military

& Me

When and how did you meet your partner? We met in 2006 at the gym but actually got together in 2010.

Best thing about military life?

Name: Kate Williams Age: 43 Current location: Plymouth

Best of both worlds: family time but also time to myself when he’s away.

Worst thing about military life?

What’s your guilty secret when he’s away? No shaving? Cereal for dinner? Love Island re-runs?! Not having to plan meals!!

Do you do anything special when your partner returns? No! He likes doing all the usual stuff: eating out, walks on the beach, staying at home.

Homecoming meal?

Disrupted family life. The goodbyes. Unpredictability. Everything is last minute.

Shepherd’s Pie is always a request!

Favourite posting?

Homecoming outfit?

Plymouth

Nothing special as he usually comes home in the middle of the night!

How do you deal with goodbyes? Very ‘matter of fact’. It’s the only way I cope with them.

Do you have certain coping mechanisms for dealing with the absence of your partner? Definitely getting into a routine and making sure we’re busy at the weekends. Weekdays are busy with work and nursery.

What’s your top tip for new military partners? Always make the most of a posting, make new friends etc. Don’t let deployments define your life.

What three words would you use to describe military partners? Strong, resilient, independent.

Would you like to feature in the next issue? Email us at justforher@forcespublishing.co.uk 54

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WIN!

£30 VOUCHER For your chance to WIN a £30 Not On The Highstreet voucher…

Email us at justforher@ forces publishing. co.uk

Or tell us on Facebook or Twitter…

Why you deserve to win!

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SOUTH EAST MILITARY CATCHMENT

Natural State Therapies

Mobile & Clinic-based in West Sussex Therapeu c and deep ssue massage My service is highly tailored to the individual, depending upon their needs and desires, ranging from general relaxing full-body to more localised work to treat specific condi ons. Sessions can run from 30 minutes to an hour-and-a-half (up to two hours is available in some circumstances), and can be one-off or part of a more regular arrangement.

Treatments available: Roy Millard, LCM Dip MFHT • Relaxing therapeu c massage • Pregnancy massage • Deep ssue massage www.naturalstatetherapies.co.uk • Massage for chronic pain Naturalstatetherapies • Massage for anxiety NatStateTherapy • Massage for fibromyalgia Skype: naturalstatetherapies • Chair massage

07713 124210

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I work holistically with balancing emotions to achieve peace of mind as well as balancing the mind body and spirit for improving health.

• Bach Flower Therapy to balance any of the 38 emotions that can be out of balance causing stress. • Reiki is a gentle but powerful form of hands on healing. • Laughter Therapy which helps you connect with your playful creative self whilst also providing you with a wide range of health beneﬁts which are scientiﬁcally supported.

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Find Yourself and start living Life Your Way Holistic Coaching and Healing including:

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RING ELLIE FOR A QUOTE SELECTION OF MENUS & A WINE LIST AVAILABLE 2 LARCH AVENUE, CHARD, SOMERSET, TA20 1DD TEL: 01460 66165 • E-MAIL: e.hinmers007@btinternet.com

“Heavenly food for your cherished event” pork served HILL succulent I use local suppliers, giving good with freshly baked baps, value for money and quality taste! BILLY homemade stuffing and apple sauce as well HOG as onions. Selection of finger buffet options of hot and cold food available. a selection of breakfast HOT baps, toasties, panini’s, Catering for all events such as... burgers and hotdogs. NOSH fund raising events, christenings, SCONE aofselection birthdays, weddings, anniversary home cakes, IN 60 made celebrations and end of life wakes. teas and SECONDS coffees. Every event in our life is a freshly filled PANINI cherished one of which we give a panini’s and professional friendly service. toasties with chips. PIT STOP TOP

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>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

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Bonmarché Black Chelsea Boot £28

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1 8

NEW YEAR NEW SHOE

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>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

ANIMAL

River Island Plus Leopard Print Faux Fur Coat £95

INSTINCT From leopard and snake prints to zebra and tiger stripes, it’s clear we’re still WILD about animal print!

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Next Python pleated skirt £35

George at ASDA Pink Leopard Jumper £16

V by Very Zebra Print Denim Skirt £28

New Look Stone Leopard Print Suedette Knee High Boots £39.99

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Primark UK £5

Oliver Bonas Leopard Boarder Print Scarf £22

Next Zebra Print Twist Front Dress £35 Miss Selfridge Rust Leopard Print Plisse Wide Leg Trousers £28

Next Paisley and Leopard Print Wrap Dress £58

Oliver Bonas Leopard Socks £6

V by Very Co-ord Animal Print Skirt £28

Primark UK £8

Lipsy AC Zebra Print Shirt £40

V by Very Gold Snake Print Skinny Jeans £35

F&F Red Leopard Print Skirt £20

New Look Brown Brushed Neon Leopard Print Jumper 61 £24.99

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George at ASDA Floral PJ Set £12

>> FASHION LOOKBOOK

Figleaves DKNY £77

Primark UK Pyjama Top £5, Bottoms £8

M&S Collection Dressing Gown £28

Figleaves Foil Flamingo Long PJ Set £35

Primark UK Floral Chemise £7

Just for Her issue 20 2018.indd 62

Accessorize Biena Satin Print Vest Set £22

Tu Clothing Peach Check Print Fleece Pyjama Set £16

Next Red Cable Knitted Bed Socks £15

George at ASDA Harry Potter Pyjamas, Price TBC

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Primark UK £8

Not every day can be a duvet day, but when you do get the chance to lounge around in your PJs, whether it’s style or comfort you’re after, we have a few of our faves this season…

NIGHTWEAR 63

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We are Bobs and Suze, based in Taunton in the heart of beautiful Somerset. We make artisan pizza baked in our mobile, wood fired pizza oven, at events and private functions in and around the South West. We believe in good food and make everything ourselves using fresh, quality ingredients which are locally and sustainably sourced wherever possible. T:

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✓ Menopause Relief ✓ Weight Reduction Program ✓ Anxiety Release 64

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Phew! The whirlwind of Christmas and New Year is over! But the fun and festivities, stresses and strains, late nights and early starts, family and friends, plus an excess of food and wine have probably left you feeling tired, jaded, and in need of a lift! So, like many other women at this time of year, you’re thinking about losing some weight, exercising more, and eating healthier - perhaps you’ve already started? After all, January is the BIG month for getting small. It’s also a big month for dieting advice, enticing promises, and claims to help you get the body you want - fast. It’s all very confusing. What should you do? • Follow the latest diet or lifestyle trend • Avoid certain foods or even cut out whole food groups entirely • Eat ‘clean’, eat ‘raw’ or follow a plantbased diet • Starve yourself or fast on certain days or • Simply miss some meals Stacks of women start the year with good dietary intentions that never materialise. They choose a diet, decide they WILL stick to it, but before they know it, they’ve fallen back on bad habits. If you are one of the many women who struggle with food and their weight, let me reassure you that it’s NOT your fault!

Diets DON’T work That’s right, the strategy so many of us rely on to look and feel our best sets us up for failure and disappointment. Let me tell you why... Firstly, many diets don’t even provide enough calories to meet a women’s Basal Metabolic Rate - that’s the amount of energy (calories) a body requires to stay alive in the absence of activity - approximately 1200 calories a day. Never mind what you need to actually live your life!

Secondly, the practice of avoiding certain foods or cutting out food groups creates cravings for ‘forbidden’ foods which makes them even harder to resist. So, while a diet may lead to weight loss initially, if you’re not getting enough calories, your brain triggers an instinctive survival response which makes you obsess about food, proactively seek out food, and then EAT. As a result, and despite your best intentions, the ‘rules’ of the diet get broken. It’s not unusual to experience a ‘WTF moment’, leading to overeating or bingeing and a promise to be ‘good’ tomorrow. And so, begins the cycle of restrictions and rule breaking coupled with feelings of guilt, shame, anxiety and failure. Your body doesn’t help either! When your eating becomes erratic and you stop eating enough to sustain yourself, your metabolic rate decreases making it even harder to lose weight. In an attempt to gain back some control, you limit your food choices or calories further, but all that does is make binge eating more likely. It’s why dieters can find themselves at war with their bodies (and their minds). And if you already have a challenging relationship with food or turn to eating when upset, causing you to comfort or emotional eat or maybe even binge and purge – restrictive dieting – in any form is really bad news for you.

Ditching your diet isn’t the end to dreams of the body you desire; instead it’s the start of

NATIONAL

The ONE NUTRITIONIST You Need To Listen To That You’re Probably Ignoring.

you achieving it. One of the fundamental problems of following a ‘diet’ is you stop listening to your own internal cues of hunger, appetite, satisfaction, satiety - and instead you start listening to someone else. Worse still, that someone else is unlikely to know who you are, what you do or what is going on in your life. They’re just not equipped to tell you what, how, and when to eat. Fortunately, there is someone who is. And that someone is your... INNER NUTRITIONIST. Your body knows what’s best for you. We all have an ‘Inner Nutritionist’ - that voice and instinct inside who knows your body and its needs better than anyone – even your conscious mind. Learning to listen to her will restore your sanity around food, eating, weight maintenance, and even weight loss. And when you listen to and respect your own internal cues around food and eating, you’ll take a step closer to the body you desire. As nature intended, you’ll be working with your body not against it. It’s a paradox, but dieting isn’t the way to go for permanent results. I know this because for over 15 years, I was on the dieting [not so] merrygo-around; losing weight and gaining weight, bingeing and purging and my life was a nightmare. However, all that ended over 25 years ago when I stopped dieting, recovered from bulimia, and began to listen to my ‘Inner Nutritionist’.

Want to feel better about food? Want to feel better about you? Than ditch your diet.

If you want to create an empowering relationship with food and you want to feel happy, healthy, and slim, email me - Julie@BulimiaFree.com - with subject line INNER NUTRITIONIST.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with wanting to look your best and feel comfortable in your skin. However, restrictive dieting - in any form or disguise - is simply not the way to go as you only end up in a conflict with your own body and mind.

I’ll send you some free information and some next steps (it’s all confidential) that will help you learn to listen to your Inner Nutritionist so you can stop struggling with food and eating perhaps for good.

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jWINTER

r v

BREAKS

Staycation is the new vacation, and before you go googling winter sun getaways take a look at what’s on offer a little closer to home! Sure you’ll need a winter coat and you won’t need to pack a bikini (well, probably not, but who really knows with Britain’s unpredictable weather?!) but these small town getaways sparkle in the winter and are the perfect places to explore on frosty days and cosy up in on cold winter evenings. Bakewell, Derbyshire Bakewell, famous for the Bakewell Tart, knows a thing or two about keeping its visitors cosy and well fed. In this gorgeous market town you are never a few steps away from a tea room or cosy pub, so when you’ve spent all day exploring the spectacular Peak District which is right on its doorstep there are plenty of places to settle down for the evening and enjoy some warming comfort food & drink. For something a little different, check out the candle lit tours of Haddon Hall which run over Winter. Bakewell’s thriving Monday market is always popular and its cobbled courtyards and market square are home to independent

shops and galleries and, of course, no visit to Bakewell is complete without a visit to The Original Bakewell Pudding Shop!

Bradford on Avon, Wiltshire Pretty Georgian houses and former textile mills line the streets of this quaint pint-sized village in Wiltshire. The river Avon flows through its centre and a towpath follows one of the prettiest stretches of canal in the country. With a half-hour walk to Avoncliff, or a longer 9 mile hike to Bath, there are plenty of pretty countryside walks to enjoy if that’s your thing. In the evenings choose from one of the many comfy

Bradford on Avon pubs, cosy up by the fireside and enjoy a few warm ciders. And when it comes to dining you can choose from a variety of cuisines at traditional English, French and Spanish restaurants dotted around the town. It’s the perfect place for a spot of shopping with independent stores a plenty, selling everything from scarves to ceramics, and antiques to locally made pickles and cheeses. Ruby Red, an independent wine store, sells Somerset Pomona (a moreish cider brandy) and beers from local microbrewery Kettlesmith.

Shrewsbury, Shropshire

The Original Bakewell Pudding Shop

Home to more than 650 listed buildings and birthplace to

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Chatsworth in the Snow

Charles Darwin, Shrewsbusy is bursting with culture. It’s higgledy-piggeldy streets and riverside parks host a vibrant music and arts scene and make this compact town a dynamic destination. The main road, Wyle Cop, is home to many stores in overhanging Tudor buildings, with deli’s, kitchen shops, wine merchants and clothes shops to name a few. The market hall on Claremont Street is far more impressive on the inside than it’s dated 1960s exterior promises with tonnes of local produce on offer.

Totnes, Devon Totnes is a small riverside town with a glut of independent shops, cafes and listed buildings and whilst its dining options are not extensive, what it does have to offer is the best of the best. For the best coffee you will ever taste head to The Curator, where the baristas serve single estate brews and wholemeal, fruity cakes. Above this is Curator Kitchen, offering excellent Italian fare. Rumour boasts a familyfriendly atmosphere with good burgers and decent beer and The Totnes Brewing Company is the cosiest drinking den in town, with a dozen draught and lots of bottled craft beers. Totnes is perfect for picking up some extra special food; Riverford Organic has a shop on the High Street here and along with the freshest veg you can also treat yourself to local crab, salmon, hams and wines. Other shops provide good pickings for quirky gifts to take back to family and friends, with the High Street selling everything from ethical woollens to cool vinyl.

Holt, Norfolk

Shrewsbury, Shropshire

This Georgian town heaves with holidaymakers during Summer but in the middle of Winter when the crowds are

Inside Shrewsbury Market

The Curator Kitchen - Totnes, Devon gone and the streets are quiet the town takes on a whole new atmosphere. Wrap up warm for brisk but beautiful wintery walks along the beach at nearby Sheringham, and see thousands

of overwintering birds gather on the saltmarshes at Cley and Blakeney. Children might like a trip on the steam train on the continues over page >> 67

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Vicar’s Close

North Norfolk Railway which runs on selected dates during winter, or a boat trip to see the seal pups at Blakeney. The Folly Tea Room in Hoppers Yard serves delicious sandwiches and cream teas in a cosy, vintagethemed setting. The Kings Head pub on the High Street is the place to go for pub classics, such as sausage and mash, slow-roast pork belly and steak-and-ale stew with dumplings. Holt is renowned for its shops and galleries, many of which are hidden away in yards and alleys off the High Street.

Wander around the medieval streets, including the perfectly preserved Vicar’s Close, or for something more energetic, climb Tor Hill and join the East Mendip Way for a bracing walk across the hills. There are plenty of eateries to suit all tastes, one of the favourites being Ensemble, a big hit with locals for its simple but well-executed menu with its emphasis on local produce. As you’d expect from a well-heeled cathedral city with a healthy tourist trade, Wells has more than its share of chic shops and galleries. Stock up on Somerset cheeses and chutneys at the Queen Street Deli, gifts and traditional children’s toys at Cadeaux & Co on the High Street, and retro and vintage clothes, trinkets and furniture at the Wells Trading Post in the 12th-century Priory Mill.

The Folly Tea Room

Wells, Somerset The smallest city in the UK, with more of a small town feel than that of a bustling city, Wells is fabulous all year round but especially in winter.

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Wells Cathedral and Glastonbury Tor

14/01/2019 15:20

Every Entrepreneur and SME Owner feels or will have felt the stress of running a business. As your business starts to grow you face a greater workload. Do you ask yourself “how can I manage this pressure on my own”?

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The Mystic Wolf @mysticwolfshop www.themysticwolf.com We are qualified Reiki Healers and our mission is to help as many people as possible. This is the most natural, holistic way. We feel so happy to be able to share this service with the rest of the world. We sell crystals, gemstones, crystal jewellery and holistic products. We also provide services such as Tarot, Clairvoyance and Palmistry readings and will soon be introducing our Crystal Healing services.

ReiKi is more than Energy Healing. Discover your True Self and change your life. Accept your individuality. Find your life purpose. Contact Lorraine on 07733 609 655 or lc.drohan@gmail.com

WEST MILITARY CATCHMENT

07956648118

Angels Bless Reiki

07969 460 863

enquiries@theolddoughhook.co.uk

JulzDotJulz

www.theolddoughhook.co.uk Available throughout the West Midlands

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I am Julz, a Digital Artist, working with iPad and stylus, creating many different types and styles of pictures, some humorous others more decorative. Creating bespoke orders, together we can work on your idea, please visit my facebook page to book an appointment, find me at Julz The Digital Artist, Tap Book.

Awesome WoodfiRed Pizzas Based Out of Malvern Authentic wood fired pizza, hand rolled and baked to order in our vintage food truck. The perfect addition to your parties, weddings, corporate events and more.

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CITIES A TO Z

Queenstown Surrounded by majestic mountains and set on the shores of crystal clear Lake Wakatipu, the natural beauty and the unique energy of this region of New Zealand creates the perfect backdrop for a holiday full of adventure, discovery and rejuvenation.The best time to visit is in the springtime (Sep-Nov) and leading into summer (Dec-Feb).

pring in Queenstown is a time for fun and discovery. The green valleys burst with fresh spring buds and green pastures are surrounded by snow-capped peaks, heralding the arrival of spring. Spring is a unique season when you can literally do everything Queenstown has on offer. With the ski fields open until early October, but the basin green with fresh growth, you

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that can be cool in the mountains but also warm down in the valleys and downtown.

painting and photography classes to flax weaving and choir lessons.

As well as Queenstown’s ski areas and cycling and walking tracks being open, they also offer incredible vantage points of the landscape across the region. For keen photographers it’s a great time to capture the impressive snow-capped peaks alongside cherry blossom and spring daffodils.

If you plan a visit in October over Labour Weekend you’ll also be able to listen to smooth, soulful tunes at the Queenstown Jazz Festival at venues around the district.

The Queenstown area is also known as a wine growing region, in particular for its Pinot Noir variety and top growing conditions mean the area has more than its fair share of award-winning vintages. Spring is a pretty time in the vineyards and wine tours are a great way to discover the wineries and vineyards. Spend an afternoon soaking up the scenery, sampling Pinot Noir, and nibbling a gourmet platter of local produce al fresco, surrounded by spring blooms. If all the wine tasting has you thinking about food there’s over 150 eateries in Queenstown and nearby Arrowtown. The warmer days also mean dining alfresco is an ideal way to enjoy the spring sunshine.

can ski in the morning and either golf, mountain bike or hike in the afternoons. The renowned hiking trails are open, so whether you’re enjoying spring skiing, cycling, hiking or golfing you can pack a lot of adventure into one day. Spring skiing brings softer conditions with warmer days and a focus on fun on the mountains. It’s the perfect time to hit the slopes for a social time with friends and family. Warmer days are perfect for kids or learners, while the snow sports enthusiasts can continue to get their fix well into the spring months at any of the region’s diverse ski areas.

As well as the action on the mountain in spring there are also many exciting events in the Queenstown region. The Arrowtown Spring Arts Festival in September includes a pop-up market in the Buckingham Green. The festival sees artists and students take over the town to create amazing pieces during a range of workshops including

In November the Air New Zealand Queenstown International Marathon hits Queenstown’s streets and trails. The full marathon starts just outside of Arrowtown and incorporates a mixture of road and trail running. Entrants can experience the ‘flat out beauty’ of the region in the half marathon race, 10km race, or 3km kids challenge. Summer in Queenstown means long sunny days and fresh alpine air. It means food, drink, socialising and an irresistible desire for adventure - whether it’s adrenalinefuelled or leisurely exploration for an unforgettable Queenstown summer holiday. The months of December - February are summer in the Southern Hemisphere. Daytime temperatures reach between 20°C and 30°C and Queenstown’s 45° south latitude means that dawn is as early as 5am, while dusk settles around 10pm. The longer days and evenings are perfect for getting outdoors and enjoying the diversity of landscapes and range of things to do that the region is world-famous for.

continues over page >> Skiers sking down a slope at Coronet Peak

The sun shines from early morning until 7-8pm, thawing winter’s touch, with daytime temperatures ranging between 8°C and 22°C. The days start to get longer and warmer and while you still need to pack a coat, there are plenty of sunshine hours to design your ideal holiday itinerary. Queenstown’s continental-like climate can also mean unpredictable spring weather. It pays to pack layers and prepare for weather 71

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Summer is peak season in Queenstown and the energy of the downtown area, buzzing with a cosmopolitan mix of people from all around the world, is undeniable. People travel from around the world to experience Queenstown and the Central Otago summer - long, dry and with a veritable vitality and vibrancy in the air. Mild mornings can make way for hot days in this part of the world so plan ahead and pack warmer layers for early mornings and evenings and cooler clothes for the long, hot days. The sun can be extreme in the South Island so it’s a good idea to carry sunblock and a water bottle too. The epic summer landscapes and inviting outdoors will have you heading outside and into nature for your next adventure. Whether it’s a leisurely stroll by the lake or a hike up into the mountains, summer is the perfect time to explore, discover and write your own adventures. Make the most of the sunshine and get out on the water on Lake Wakatipu. Options include racing along with one of Queenstown’s four jet boat operators, sailing above the water while parasailing, kayaking, or taking a leisurely lake cruise on a vintage steamship or luxury yacht. Fill your day with adventure and activities or relax on the beaches and go swimming or fishing on the lake and surrounding rivers. It’s also peak season to enjoy the region’s internationally renowned hiking and biking trails. Of course the tease of an adrenaline fix is what has brought so many people to Queenstown in the early days of adventure, and these days there are even more ways to get some thrills. From skydiving and bungee jumping, to speeding along in an enclosed shark-like watercraft or a Lake Wakatipu

Ropejumping in the mountains thrilling ride in a jet boat - coming inches from the canyon’s jagged outcrops. On land, there’s also four-wheel driving, buggy and dirt bike operators around the region—or for a real taste of luxury, scenic helicopter flights from Queenstown to glaciers, mountain tops and picnic stops, provide just the right amount of excitement. The heady days of summer are the perfect time to the take to the air flight-seeing or head out on a road trip and explore the region’s outlying towns including Glenorchy, Arrowtown and Kingston. However you explore the region and whatever you choose to do, there is certainly no place like Queenstown in summer! With thanks to www.queenstownnz.co.nz

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WEST MILITARY CATCHMENT

LEILANI LEA, B.Ac, Lic.Ac, MTAS, MFEMTC.

Acupuncturist with 40years experience

LASER ACUPUNCTURE The ancient science of Acupuncture combined with cutting edge technology, for a new healing effect.

Original artwork is the name I’ve given myself to work under otherwise I would be just an oil on canvas artist, struggling with the rest of the competition for interest. It is my intention for my art to be viewed and thus find success in the art world, but for people to first hear about me, I must “put myself” out there, which is no doubt a scary prospect but I believe I’m good enough for it.

Conditions that can be treated with Laser Acupuncture:

How good I am is up to you the public to decide... I hope the passion and skill in my work shines through and that I make new friends on a journey where I find success. Melissa

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07808 200020

MILSOM St CLINIC, 28 Milsom Street, Bath BA1 1DG

07527254375 • info@therapitylino.co.uk • Based in TORFAEN, South Wales Mon - Thur 9am - 6pm | Fri 9am - 5pm | Sat by appointment only | Sun closed

WALES MILITARY CATCHMENT

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Contact: Paul & Joanna Smalldon 01639 773086 | 07814 472235 | Email: fm4luxury@gmail.com

www.fm4quality.info 73

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NORTHERN IRELAND MILITARY CATCHMENT

Contact Lindsay Mobile catering van hire in Ballyclare

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Mountpottingter Methodist church: Mondays 9.30am & 5.30pm Cregagh Methodist church:

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www.countrydinercatering.co.uk

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SILHOUETTE PROFILES

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SCOTLAND MILITARY CATCHMENT

Face Painting and Glitter Bar Give Good Face brings fun and sparkle to parties, corporate events, weddings and special occasions.

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