My Resilience and Mindset Change Story

Leading Myself to Lead Others My Resilience and Mindset Change Story

If someone had said to me 6 years ago that in 2021 I would be starting up my own coaching business, I would have laughed at them. The thought of doing anything remotely like that would have been unimaginable to me and the reason for this was that 6 years ago I was not in a great place emotionally, mentally or physically.

I had been enjoying a successful corporate career as a leader, motivating, growing and developing people and teams. I loved helping to build and nurture strong relationships across all levels within the business I worked in. I was a confident and capable woman who was completely comfortable delivering coaching and training initiatives to large groups of people from employees to senior leaders.

But in 2015/2016, all that started to change. I started to have trouble concentrating and remembering the simplest of things. I suffered with vast changes in my mood and confidence, experiencing huge lows and I doubted myself and my abilities.

It was really tough and left me frustrated, tired and feeling out of control. I didn’t realise at the time but I had headed into peri-menopause and the impact that it had on my mood and cognition was extremely challenging.

The real impact for me was at work, all the things I was comfortable doing suddenly seemed impossible to me. Standing up in front of people, running meetings, taking on new projects completely scared me and I couldn’t understand why. I suddenly found that I was full of self-doubt. I’d lost all sense of purpose and identity and I just didn’t know who I was anymore. I hated feeling out of control, so I started to work more and more to prove to myself, and others, that I was still capable. The stress , anxiety and overwhelm resulted in me taking time out of my career for three months to recover.

What I did know was that I had to do something and I used this time for self-reflection and took the opportunity to understand what was happening to me and why. I started to spend time on myself, focusing on what I wanted and needed. I changed my lifestyle, focused on my health and wellbeing which allowed me to understand how to manage my body and mind. It helped me to identify my sense of purpose and gave me the motivation and focus to start to take back control of my life.

I successfully got my head back in the game and returned to work and spent the following three years continuing to work on myself and share my knowledge with others.

My Mindset Switch

In 2019, the opportunity of redundancy came before me and I was asking myself what I was going to do with my life. The initial temptation was to hide away and avoid facing the challenges on the horizon, but something inside me made me decide that it was time to continue with my new way of thinking and a new way of living.

I chose to embrace challenges as opportunities, to replace negative words and thoughts with positive ones, to trust myself, and to give myself the grace to make mistakes and learn from them. And do you know what happened? Day by day, week by week, I began to feel more calm, settled and in control. I began to feel like I could face anything that life threw at me, because with the inner mental and emotional resilience that I had built, every challenge would be reframed as an opportunity for growth and learning..

So I decided to take redundancy and in September 2019, I went back to college and studied for my CIPD Level 5 in HR Management, because at that time I was still unsure of what direction my career would take. It was challenging as I hadn’t studied for such a long time, but it allowed me to develop more skills and experience. It proved to me that I was capable of learning and taking on new challenges.

Part of the course covered “Coaching and Mentoring” and it really ignited my passion to coach others, so they could also see the potential they had to make positive changes in their lives.

I then decided to continue my study and in May 2021 I became a qualified Advanced NLP Practitioner. I also decided to invest in a coach who helped me to focus on my next steps in my professional life.

I wanted to go further and I wanted to use what I had learnt to help other women build their mental and emotional resilience, so that they could avoid going through the same experience as I had. I spent a lot of time reading and researching and I realised that I was not alone in how I had been feeling. There were a lot of other women who were struggling in their personal lives and careers. This was not only holding them back from the aspirations they had, but it was also demotivating and disengaging them too.

● 75% of women say they lack confidence at work

● 61% of women said they appeared confident, but did not actually feel it

● 55% of women said that managing a negative mindset was a key challenge to overcome

I wanted to work with women to help them build their resilience and strength, so that they start to believe in themselves, helping them to grow their inner confidence and self-esteem, by creating a growth mindset.

My Resilience and Mindset Solution

The changes I have made have allowed me to take a new direction and start up my own coaching business - Inspire To Aspire. Where I help other women who may be suffering with mindset and confidence issues like I was.

All the tools and techniques that I used to help build my own mental and emotional resilience and positive mindset I wanted to use to help others. Through my personal reflection and NLP study, I developed my Leading Yourself Framework. I wanted to help “Lead Women to Lead Themselves” and my framework which consists of 6 key principles equips them with the tools they need to start making the positive changes they want, by helping to reframe their mindset and build their strength and resilience.

One of the most important relationships you can have - is with YOURSELF so it’s important to ensure that you Take the Lead in your own life. My coaching Programme is designed to help you find your “Why”, get motivated to create your desired outcomes & to build resilience to fulfil your potential. It will help you:

● Create a self supporting toolkit that you can use when you need it

● Find clarity to help you identify your life purpose and understand your core values in life

● Develop your vision and guide you through the steps of creating a plan of action, so that you can get to where you want to be

● Change your patterns of limiting behaviour and break your negative habits so you can move forward and live the life you want

● Develop your mental and emotional resilience through recognising your own strengths and talents and support you as you make the changes that will make your life better

The LEADING SELF Framework

is made up of six ´principles´ all linked together. By focusing on ALL six principles, you will be able to achieve a real connection with yourself and others

Through my Leading Yourself Programme and dedicated one to one coaching, I will help to take you out of your comfort zone by empowering you to challenge your doubts and limiting beliefs and raise your self-esteem to create a positive outlook on life starting from within.

My passion is to help women who are sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, to find purpose in their life, and this is even more important as we mature.

Purpose is our driver, it focuses on our level of passion and motivation and what drives us to accept change and take on new opportunities. It creates meaning from the work we do and how we spend our time.

Having your own “Reason Why” or “Purpose” helps us to lead a stronger, positive and healthier life, both within your professional and personal life.

As we grow and experience more in life, things inevitably change. We all need a purpose or reason why and effectively, as you get older this matters more. It matters what you believe in, who you are and what you truly value.

If you are at the end of a chapter in your life such as an end of a relationship, empty nesting, if you are suffering from self-doubt or if you have had a change in your self-confidence for some reason - all of these things can make you question your purpose.

At times like these it can literally feel like your world, as you know it, is crumbling beneath your feet. Nothing makes sense. You question every decision you make, as your trust, judgement and belief in yourself diminishes.

You can feel demotivated to try new things, you don’t really know what it is that really matters to you and thinking of the future can make you feel anxious. When faced with making plans for your future and understanding what you want to achieve, it can feel difficult and lead you to feeling lost, uncertain and overwhelmed. Firstly, what you need to know is that this is perfectly normal. Throughout our busy and hectic lives it can be challenging to be focused and upbeat every day. It is important to understand that down days are part of life and usually this is a time of transition from one stage of life to another.

What you have to work out is your ‘why’. What you need to consider during these low and uncertain periods are what makes you happy? What brings you joy? What are your passions? What is your gut telling you?

Start focusing on you, so that you can gain a better understanding of who you are, what your strengths and talents are and what you truly value. Learn how to make the most of your skills and experiences. You are unique and therefore have unique abilities that can help to move you towards your passions and help to boost your self-esteem and self-confidence.

Take positive steps to make changes in your life by setting yourself achievable goals. This helps you to have a clear direction in life and a list of goals is a good way to remind yourself that you are making progress. Making large changes can feel quite daunting, so breaking them into smaller changes can make us feel more motivated, and successful.

Having a “Reason Why” or “Purpose” ensures that we don’t give up when faced with challenges, but allows us to refocus them into opportunities which helps us to learn and grow.

A sense of purpose is personal to each of us and it is something that we need to figure out for ourselves. What is important is that you can identify what is important to YOU. So take the time to listen to yourself and you will find out all you need to know.

As I took myself through my framework I was able to clearly identify my “Why”. It helped motivate me to set out my vision: “For all women to build mental and emotional resilience to help them take personal ownership of their growth and development, enabling them to have full control over their personal and professional lives”.

I was able to take the steps to build my resilience that enabled me to take the lead in my own life and to start fulfilling my passion of coaching and helping to “Lead Women to Lead Themselves”.

My current journey has been a challenging one and not without its ups and downs, but I now have the knowledge and skills to help me on the way. I realised that having a dip in my self-confidence was actually a good thing.

What has also really helped me was speaking out about how I was feeling. By speaking to other women that were experiencing the same issues as me, I realised that I was not alone and that I was definitely not going mad. I wanted to share my personal story so others can see that change is possible and that by understanding ourselves and what we want we can start to push and challenge ourselves to the edge of our comfort zone and take the scary step outside of it as this is where the magic of growth and change happens. This is the point where you start growing into the best version of yourself.

If you are looking to create a new direction and take the steps towards long-lasting, positive change, then book a Complimentary Consultation with me as I’d love to learn more about you and the potential changes that you would like to make