SPECIAL CHALLENGE-ONLINE color PHOTO ESSAYS page 15: Russian LGBTs Stand Against Violence. page 18: "Life Is Better With You"
CHALLENGE
The Newsletter of the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County – Serving New Jersey’s GLBTI Communities Continuously Since 1972
V o lu m e 3 9, I ssu e 9, No v e m be r 2 0 13
It’s a Small World by Andy Skurna We have heard for decades that the world is shrinking, yet how often do we sit down and consciously consider by how much or by what means? How does this impact our LGBT lives? Most active GAAMC members are from my generation, or older. That means we have been around for all of the modern gay rights movement, and then some. Back in the 1960s and 1970s there was a different level of acceptance. In those days, people were quiet and sexual orientation was rarely mentioned. Even when everyone knew the “spinsters” down the street weren’t really just roommates it was rarely mentioned in polite company and they were left alone…as long as they remained in the closet, or didn’t try to intermingle too much with “regular folk,” that is. Today, we aren’t silent any longer. Not only are those women not spinsters, they are WIVES. They are a FAMILY. They are great neighbors, proud of their homes and families. They are happy…and demand the right to be!
never had a passport. I have never traveled anywhere that I needed one.) 7 years ago, I could have counted my friends on my fingers. Today, I share LGBT news and activism initiatives all over the world. I play games with people who live in my house as well as in England, Spain, Australia, China, and Pakistan. These are people who see my political posts. These are people from whom I do not hide my identity, my sexual orientation, or my views on religious freedom. When I share something, they all see it. Borders such as the “Iron Curtain” and the Berlin Wall are gone. Barriers such as the Atlantic and Pacific and even different languages are all but eliminated. (I communicate in American English, French, Spanish, German, Portuguese, and Russian, even though I don’t know those languages.)
However, as Isaac Newton told us, “To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction.” As America’s LGBTIQA community has forged a greater and stronger demand for equal respect, the disciples of oppression have applied force elsewhere. In an age when anyone with airfare can get almost anywhere on the planet, and anyone with a computer or smartphone can connect to “social” media, there really are very few borders these days. No longer does the LGBTI community show up in mass demonstrations with cardboard signs. We take to the Internet, and connect with like-minded people anywhere in the universe.
The so-called National Organization for Marriage (NOM) was founded in Princeton, New Jersey. It was thinly veiled as a “proopposite-gender marriage” lobbying group. When they wore out their welcome and momentum in NJ, they moved to Washington, DC, and began raising funds from a nationwide pool of uneducated haters. As they lost battle after battle, and as the US population has learned that we no longer accept their whispers about spinsters or guys who are “light in the loafers” corrupting the morals of school children, that pool of money and venom continuously evaporated. We have become more visible and less scary in the US. Their political maneuvering has been exposed. Their campaign of corruption has been exposed — and is currently under Department of Justice investigation. Their race baiting has been exposed.
To illustrate my point, there is an app on Facebook that will pinpoint your “friends’” locations on a map and draw connections. When I run it on my Friends list, it shows I am connected to people on FIVE CONTINENTS. (Note: I have
So, what’s a hate group to do, you ask? ROADTRIP! NOM has begun transforming into an International Organization against LGBTIQA Equality. (continued on page 4)
Inside Challenge Challenge Information ...................................... page 2 GAAMC Events What's happening at our Monday meetings......... page 2 Bulletin Board Add these upcoming events to your calendar........page 3 This Month's Contributors................................. page 3 Getting Personal: Classified ads......................... page 3 2013 New Jersey Elections................................ page 3 The Little Box of Concerts: Get Out of the House!... page 3 Poetry: "Happy Pride Day Moscow"...................... page 4 SPECIAL ONLINE "Happy Pride Day Moscow" photos.... page 15
Gleanings: News you should know ...................... page 5 Q-munity Calendar.......................................... page 7 Dancing To Architecture™ Music news, views, and reviews for queer ears..... page 10 Media Outage™ Queer clippings from print and web sources...... page 11 HOT NEWS! NJ Marriage Rules!..........................page 12 Board Minutes for August................................. page 13 Poetry: "Enter" ............................................. page 13 GAAMC Information ........................................ page 14 SPECIAL ONLINE "Life Is Better With You" video scenes page 17
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GAAMC Events for November 2013 CHALLENGE Volume 39, Number 9 November 2013 ISSN 0277-1675 Staff Editor .....................Allen Neuner Assistant Editor ............. Bill Stella Advertising Manager ............. open Circulation Manager ............. open List Manager ................ Sue Harris Submissions The deadline for all articles, inserts, and advertisements is the fifteenth of the previous month. All submissions must be provided as electronic files. E-mail submissions to Challenge @ GAAMC.org. Ad Rates Single issue: Full page, $125.00; Half page, $85.00; Quarter page, $45.00; Business card, $25.00. For multi-issue rates, contact the Editor at Challenge @ GAAMC.org. GAAMC members may place one free classified ad per month, of no more than 200 characters in length. Change of Address Please let us know your new address! All address changes should be sent to the List Manager at ChangeAddress@GAAMC.org. Challenge is © 2013-2014 by the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, a 501(c)3 tax-exempt not-for-profit corporation. All rights reserved. All articles reflect the views of the original contributors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of GAAMC, its officers, or executive board. All copyrights revert to the original contributors upon publication. No portion of this publication may be reproduced without the express written permission of the contributor. All articles, contributions, and advertisements are printed at the discretion of the Editor and/or GAAMC Executive Board.
Discussion Groups
OpenTalk: A regular weekly discussion group, open to all. 7:00, in the Library. Moderators: Elias (Nov 25); Gordon (Nov 11); Sherri (Nov 18). Discussion group does not meet on Film Festival nights.
Main Events
All start at 8:00 unless otherwise noted. November 4: GAAMC's Film Festival presents God Loves Uganda, a documentary exploring the role of the American evangelical movement in Uganda, where American missionaries have been credited with both creating schools and hospitals and promoting dangerous religious bigotry. The film follows evangelical leaders in America and Uganda along with politicians and missionaries as they attempt the task of eliminating “sexual sin” and converting Ugandans to fundamentalist Christianity. NOTE: The film will start promptly at 7:00 pm. There is no Open Talk tonight. November 11: Is Aging the Same for All? No matter what our age, all of us need to think ahead. Where will we be and who will be there for us when we're "senior citizens"? This is especially important for members of the LGBT community who are totally underserved (or even ignored) by existing programs for seniors. Drs. Carolyn Bradley and Laura Kelly of Monmouth University discuss their study of the experiences of older LGBT adults, including health issues, health care provider experiences, legal and financial issues. You owe it to yourself and your loved ones to be at this program. November 18: Gratitude and You is the topic for tonight's extended Open Talk. As we near the holiday that has thanks for all that's happened in the past year at its core, let's examine what it is we're grateful for — and why we're grateful for it! Tonight's moderator will be Sherri Rase. NOTE: Open Talk Discussion will start at 7:00 pm. November 25: GAAMC's Thanksgiving Social is the time when we share from our bounty (and our cooking talents) with our GAAMC family-by-choice. This is a potluck dinner, so please bring those "family favorite" dishes that are part of your Thanksgiving tradition! Contact Socials@GAAMC.org to let us know what YOU would like to bring to the feast!
Coming in December! December 2: LGBT Youth will be the topic of tonight's presentation. Joe and Dani, two of GAAMC's newest and youngest members, will be informing us on the prospects and problems facing queer youth — which may be radically different than what queer "elders" see when they look ahead! This promises to be an intriguing and informative program, no matter what side of the "age gap" you're on! December 9: As of press time, we will have either one of two programs: a presentation by representatives of The Trevor Project, the toll-free confidential suicide hotline for gay and questioning youth; or GAAMC's Holiday Members' Market! Note: All programs and discussion groups are subject to change without notice. For the most up-to-date information, go to GAAMC.org .
November 2013
Bulletin Board Raritan Valley LGBTI Community Connections, a new social/discussion group for the queer communities in Somerset County, will be holding a social on Saturday, November 16, 2013 from 2 p.m. until 4 p.m. at the Dragonfly Cafe in Somerville. For more information, call 908-393-6711 or e-mail arnoldlauralee AT optimum.net. For directions, go to www.DragonflyMusicAndCoffee.com or Dragonfly's Facebook page. You are invited to a Transgender Day of Remembrance to be held on November 23, 2013 at 4:00 p.m. at St. Paul’s Lutheran Church in Teaneck. Transgender Day of Remembrance is a gathering to remember transgendered people and allies killed violently during past year, and to look forward to the day these murders stop. For more information, go to http://www.pathwaystg.org/ (tab to News/TDOR) or http://stpaulsteaneck.com/ (tab to Justice - November 23). Are you wondering what to do with your Thanksgiving leftovers? The Pride Center of New Jersey is ready to help out! November 29 — the Saturday after Thanksgiving — the Pride Center invites you all to GaysGiving! This get-together will be a chance for all of us to share leftover dishes and good company with each other. It's also a food drive to benefit the Middlesex County Food Organization and Outreach Distribution Services with our donations of non-perishable foods. So come on over to the Pride Center at 5:00 pm on November 29 and join us in giving thanks for the many good things the GLBTI communities have received this year — and a great leftovers dinner to boot! R U a student at Rutgers/Newark? R U looking to get together with other LGBT students on a weekly basis? Then RU Pride is the group for you! We meet every Wednesday from 2:30 to 3:50 pm to socialize and discuss issues that are important to you as a member of the LGBT community. We're in room 344 of Conklin Hall. Come check us out! For more information, contact Bryan at 973-353-5716. You'll also find us on Facebook! GLBT of Hunterdon County of NJ will not be meeting in November and December. But starting in January 2014, they will be meeting on the first Thursday of every month! Go to www.glbtofhunterdoncountyofnj.com for updates!
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2013 New Jersey Elections by Bill Stella with Allen Neuner
New Jersey voters have a General Election on Tuesday, November 5, Election Day, in which the voters will choose a governor, all 120 members of the Legislature, and assorted local officials and school board members. It is often said that elections are decided by those who show up to vote, and that if you don't vote, you are not allowed to complain about the results afterwards. To this, we add: No candidate's election — or defeat — is a foregone conclusion unless voters refuse to cast their votes. On November 5th, vote early: Polls open at 6:00 a.m.. Vote late: If you're in line by 8:00 p.m. you still get to vote. But dammit, VOTE!
This Month's Contributors Scott Free, an original Out musician, made an early impact on the BET network and the fusion of Hip Hop and Punk Rock, was twice named Outmusician of the Year, inducted into the Chicago G&L Hall of Fame. Explore his career further at ScottFree.net, with links to nearly two dozen sites Scott participates in. (pg. 4) Tony Puma's career in sales / marketing / advertising and public relations has influenced his poetry style. He belongs to the Red Wheel Barrow Poets, South Mountain Poets, and Hudson Valley Poets-on-the-Loose. Through the prism of poetry, he sees, hears, feels, and captures emotions in words. (pg. 13) Bill Realman Stella writes Dancing To Architecture because writing about music is like that. He hosted the eclectic pop music show Highest Common Denominator on the radio for six years, a twenty year vision come true, and will host it again. Bill has collected music since age 4, when for each song he'd hear on the radio, he'd ask his mom "Do they have a record?" Making a record good enough to share is still a small miracle. If you'd like Bill to write, DJ, or promote for you, get in touch. Comments and suggestions also welcome. Write bearealman at gmail; visit http://HowToFindTheBestMusic.blogspot.com (pgs. 3, 10, 11)
Getting Personal
Move To Somerville! Fine houses for sale, many in easy walking distance to train station, near Gay neighbors, vibrant and renewed downtown. Contact Bill (not an agent) for more information, bearealman at gmail.com .
T H E L I T T L E B O X O F C O NC E RT S ™ GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!
Fri Nov 8 Q ◂ Toshi Reagon | Rubin Museum Of Art,NYC, NY Q ◂ Ani DiFranco and Melissa Ferrick Pollak Theatre | Monmouth University, NJ Q ◂ B-52s 8 PM | Keswick Theatre | Philadelphia, PA Q ◂ Sinead O'Connor Fri - Sun, Nov 8, 9, 10 | City Winery, NYC, NY Q ◂ Christine Martucci Sat, Nov 9 | John & Peters, New Hope, PA Sun, Nov 10 Paquito D'Rivera | 11 AM & 1 PM | NJ PAC, Newark, NJ Q ◂ Plastic Passion, Fisty | Henrietta Hudson, NYC, NY Q ◂ Marcia Ball Mon Nov 11 | World Cafe Live, Philly Q ◂ Dar Williams and Toshi Reagon Thu Nov 14 | SOPAC, South Orange
Q ◂ Ani DiFranco Fri Nov 15 | Music Hall Of Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY Q ◂ Johnny Marr Sat Nov 16 | Webster Hall, NYC, NY Q ◂ The Jill & Julia Show - Jill Sobule & Julia Sweeney "...team up for a delightful, informal set that pairs Jill’s witty songwriting with Julia’s wildly funny monologues for a show about love lost and found, love wished for and love taken away, the complicated joys of family, navigating mid-life, and living in our crazy, modern world." Fri Nov 22 | Sanctuary Concerts.org, Chatham, NJ
Robert Randolph & The Family Band
Tue & Wed Nov 26 & 27 | Brooklyn Bowl, Brooklyn, NY Wed Nov 27
Frank Turner & The Sleeping Souls| Terminal 5, NYC NY River City Extension, Kevin Devine Stone Pony, Asbury Park NJ
Q ◂ Christine Martucci and Dina D Fri Nov 29 | Wonder Bar, Asbury Park NJ
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It's a Small World
(continued from page 1) NOM is just one of the hate groups that has invaded Uganda in the past decade. For a little perspective, it is important to note that roughly 50% of the population of Uganda is uneducated, penniless, and under the age of 15. The International House of Prayer, a cult of American evangelicals, has been pumping millions of dollars and thousands of brainwashers into the country since 2002. Scott Lively, who is currently facing charges of “crimes against humanity” in Massachusetts, has infested Uganda’s parliament since 2009 with money, pseudoscience, and religion-justified calls for murder. In 2008 or 2009 GAAMC received a request for permission to use the name “Gay Activist Alliance” since we were the last entity still using the original name. We do not own title to that name, so we did not disapprove when Dennis Hambridge created Gay Activist Alliance International (GAAI) in London. Almost immediately the GAAI opened two safe houses to protect hunted and persecuted LGBTs from Africa. In 2011, Bishop Christopher Senyonjo and his wife toured the USA in an effort to raise awareness of the plight of LGBTs in Uganda. I was asked by the Church of the Redeemer to be a panelist to interview them. I answered the call, and several people from GAAMC and the NAACP were in the audience that evening. That campaign worked. Earlier this year God Loves Uganda, a documentary exposing the contradictory and illogical evangelically drafted “Kill the Gays Bill”, premiered at the Sundance Film Festival. As GAAMC’s president, near the end of this term and facing my term limits on the Board, it is particularly significant to me that I have the opportunity to share Uganda’s story with you. With the Board’s approval, we have signed an agreement to host an educational screening of “God Loves Uganda” on Monday, November 4th. I hope you will come to GAAMC for this special event. I have focused on Uganda, but do not think this is an isolated case. It is illegal to be a homosexual in 14 African nations. And do not think this problem is limited to the conti-
nent of Africa. Brian Brown of NOM has proudly announced that he was invited to speak before Russia’s State Duma, the equivalent of our House of Representatives. His lies and religious fervor have been used to write the ever tightening laws against LGBTI citizens in Russia. They have already codified discrimination, with fines, incarceration and deportation into Russia’s constitution. Russia is currently working on legislation to remove children from households with an LGBTI head-of-household. Even if you were in a heterosexual marriage and had a child the old-fashioned way, but later came out, they will still steal your child and send them to an orphanage, to live with the other 600,000+ “unwanted” children. As oppressors move around the globe stomping out lives in the name of God, the “pressure” doesn’t go away, it simply relocates…temporarily. As I have mentioned in previous articles in Challenge, a woman from Africa, probably Nigeria, but possibly Uganda, told me on the streets of New York that “homosexuality is a disease.” I cannot overstate the significance of this. A woman in her fifties or sixties was so emboldened by hatred and ignorance that she confronted two men on the street in a country on the other side of the world from her home village. Let that sink in for a minute. How many LGBTIs would move to a foreign nation and accost two strangers just walking down the street (either of whom could beat you to a pulp) in an unprovoked attack? The concept boggles my mind. Now, imagine what is brewing in the head of her twentysomething-year old sons or daughters, or her grandchildren. The incident with her enraged me (probably because I was not in a position to confront her at the time) and I guess I will never forget it. It was an attack (even just a few words, but an attack just the same) and it will forever anger me. But, she just mumbled a few words to two middle-aged men on the street. Are her sons or grandsons out bashing high school and college students with baseball bats, brass knuckles, or switchblades? Is her granddaughter texting a classmate telling her to kill herself? “What goes around comes around,” because it is a small world after all.
H A P P Y P RI D E D AY M O S C O W — by Scott Free © 2013 From the song and video of the same name at youtu.be/Jlp-w19o11c | CAUTION: DEEP SARCASM AHEAD. ENGAGE YOUR DETECTORS NOW. Happy Pride Day Moscow Smoke bombs like an outdoor circuit party Jail cells like a scene from a gay porno movie Had their camouflage on twirling rubber batons Happy Pride Day Moscow Rocket flares like disco spotlights Riot gear like a leather bar on fetish night Marching in with grenades, Oh I love a parade Happy Pride Day Moscow All that wrestling and roughhousing between men It gets me moist all that kinky kind of S&M If they're not careful they may get injured I don't think they've ever heard of a safe word Hey, you're stepping on that rainbow flag I guess it makes a decent cleaning rag Those skinheads spitting on us — what a shocker We Gay Americans love queer punk rockers Happy Pride Day Moscow The rat-a-tat of the O T S O2's Those sexy buzzcuts and swastika tattoos Those hunky Nationalists certainly have big fists Happy Pride Day Moscow
Mock arrest like a hardcore bondage scene Flailing like trade on methamphetamine That wacky float was ideal, those paddy wagons so real Happy Pride Day Moscow Some wimpy vigil-marching candle-holders Stopped at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier So they prevent us from laying flowers I mean, who cares it was taking hours Those orthodox men they had me panting But I couldn't hear my Cher song over all that chanting Did you say "Moscow is not Sodom"? Well, Hello, you had the wrong Madonna Happy Pride Day Moscow Those flaming Russian in robes and headscarfs You Muscovites elevate drag to an art Those stun guns - oh, how they sting Is that a master/slave thing? Happy Pride Day Moscow The ritual of discipline — How rich Christian militants singing hymns — How kitsch Even Muslims and Jews were coming out there to cruise Happy Pride Day, Happy Pride Day, Happy Pride Day Moscow
November 2013
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Gleanings
Queer news from around the world
Hundreds of New Jersey same-sex couples exchanged vows Senator Harry Reid
at 12:01 a.m. on October 21st as Judge Mary Jacobson's ruling bringing marriage equality to the state took effect. Mayors
across the state officiated at many of the ceremonies, including Newark Mayor and Senator-elect Cory Booker (D), who had refused to officiate at any marriages until same-sex couples were allowed to marry in the state. Governor Chris Christie's (R) administration had initiated an appeal of the ruling, but it unexpectedly announced on October 18th that it would drop its challenge. "The governor will do his constitutional duty and ensure his administration enforces the law as dictated by the New Jersey Supreme Court," Christie spokesman Colin Reed said. New Jersey is the 14th state to allow same-sex couples to marry. (NJ.com) Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) announced that he will bring the Employment Non-Discrimination Act to the floor before the Thanksgiving recess. This bill, which has been proposed in every Congress since 1994, would make it illegal for employers to make hiring, promotion, or firing decisions based on an individual’s sexual orientation or gender identity. In all its iterations over the past two decades, ENDA has never passed in the full Senate, having died there in 1996, 2001, and notably in 2007 after it had passed in the House. An overwhelming majority of the country believe the employment protections already exist at the federal level, when in fact only 21 states protect sexual orientation and 17 protect gender identity. A representative for Reid said that the bill could be brought up for debate as early as the first week in November. Supporters will need to gather 60 votes to overcome the threat of a Republican-led filibuster. The bill passed the Senate Health, Education, Labor, and Pensions Committee with bipartisan support this summer. (ThinkProgress, BuzzFeed) The US Supreme Court announced it would not hear the appeal of conservative Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli. Cuccinelli had made the issue of sodomy a central part of his gubernatorial campaign, falsely claiming Virginia’s Crimes Against Nature law — which made it a felony for even married couples to have consensual oral or anal sex in their homes — now applied only to people who preyed on children. The smackdown is the latest in a string of disappointments for Cuccinelli, including defeats of his challenge to the Affordable Care Act and his attempt to block the regulation of greenhouse gases. (ThinkProgress) Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel urged the National Guard Bureau to "take immediate action" against states that have refused to comply with his order to process benefits for same-sex spouses of service members in the National Guard. "Not only does this violate the states' obligation under federal law, their actions have created hardship and inequality by forcing couples to travel long distances to federal military bases to obtain the ID cards they're entitled to," Hagel said in a speech to the Anti-Defamation League. According to a senior defense official, Hagel is prepared to
take further legal action. (BuzzFeed) The Cheyenne and Arapaho Tribes, a united tribe in Oklahoma, became the seventh Native American nation to provide legal recognition to same-sex couples. The united tribe's marriage law makes no specification of the gender of the participants. (Gay Star News)
Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel
The Hawaii Senate voted 20-4 in favor of a bill that would make Hawaii the 15th state with full marriage equality. "It's historic in the sense that there's a huge paradigm shift, but it's a shift that, in my opinion, bends the arc of justice towards the right way," Judiciary and Labor Committee Chairman Clayton Hee (D) said after the legislation passed the committee in a 5-2 vote. Governor Neil Abercrombie (D), who approves of the bill, convened a special legislative session to address the issue of marriage equality. Hawaii would become the 15th state with full marriage equality if the bill passes. The bill now goes to the state Assembly for their approval. Opponents of the bill are still pushing for a popular vote on the issue. (Reuters) The New Mexico Supreme Court heard arguments about whether same-sex marriages should be legally recognized. The case, which came about after eight counties began issuing marriage certificates to LGBT couples, will decide whether New Mexico becomes the 15th state to allow marriage equality. The court said it would hand down its decision by the end of the year. "What's happening in New Mexico is part of a growing national momentum across the country," said Shannon Minter, legal director at the National Center for Lesbian Rights. (Reuters) Pennsylvania Governor Tom Corbett (R) drew criticism from LGBT advocates and Democrats after comparing same-sex marriage as legally equivalent to the marriage of brothers and sisters on a radio show. Corbett was asked about an earlier comparison of same-sex marriage to marriage between children and responded, "I think a much better analogy would have been brother or sister, don't you?" Corbett apologized for the remarks in a statement issued after Equality Pennsylvania Executive Director Ted Martin called the comments "shocking and hurtful." (The Philadelphia Inquirer) Democratic Pennsylvania state Representatives Brian Sims and Steve McCarter announced the introduction of the Pennsylvania Marriage Equality Act at a news conference in Philadelphia's Love Park. The lawmakers pledged to introduce a marriage-equality bill, which now has more than 30 co-sponsors, a month before Montgomery County Register of Wills D. Bruce Hanes began issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples. "We've been seeing this growing support, so it's the right time," the openly-gay Sims said. (Philadelphia Daily News) Montgomery County, PA Registrar of Wills D. Bruce Hanes has opted to appeal a ruling that stopped him from issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples. Hanes issued 174 of them from late July through the September 12th ruling, spurring (continued on next page)
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Gleanings
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Judge Sophia Hall
a lawsuit from Governor Tom Corbett (R) and the state Department of Health. Several separate lawsuits are challenging the state's ban on marriage equality, in light of the US Supreme Court's June ruling against the Defense of Marriage Act. (The Times Herald, Norris PA)
Buncombe County, NC register of deeds Drew Reisinger has announced that he will accept marriage license applications from same-sex couples in spite of a 2012 constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage in North Carolina. "I think it's pretty clear that there is a contradiction between state law and federal law, and we want some clarification," Reisinger said. State Attorney General Roy Cooper said he supports marriage equality but feels obligated to enforce the ban. (Advocate.com) Oregon will recognize all same-sex marriages performed out of state, including other countries, according to a memo released to state agencies. The change, which is effective immediately, came the day after two same-sex couples filed legal challenges to the state's same-sex marriage ban. (Willamette Week, Portland) Four married same-sex couples in Tennessee filed a lawsuit to compel the state to recognize their marriages. The couples, who were married in other states, argue that the state is violating the Constitution's Equal Protection Clause. "Married couples should be able to travel and to live in any state knowing that their family is protected," said Shannon Minter of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, which is sponsoring the lawsuit. (Advocate.com) Two Texas couples are suing the state in an effort to overturn a 2005 referendum establishing the union of one man and one woman as the only legally recognized form of marriage. "In Texas, Plaintiffs cannot legally marry their partner before family, friends, and society — a right enjoyed by citizens who wish to marry a person of the opposite sex," attorney Barry Chasnoff, who is representing the couples, said in the lawsuit. A representative for Gov. Rick Perry said the state will resist efforts to end the marriage ban. (Gay Star News) Illinois Circuit Court Judge Sophia Hall allowed two lawsuits challenging the state's ban on gay marriage to proceed, possibly setting the stage for state courts rather than the legislature to decide whether same-sex couples will be allowed to marry in Illinois. Judge Hall ruled that lawsuits brought by same-sex couples have a chance of succeeding with the argument that the state's ban on gay marriage discriminates against them. The judge was responding to lawsuits filed by The American Civil Liberties Union and Lambda Legal on behalf of 25 samesex couples in May 2012 after the clerk of Cook County, which includes Chicago, refused to marry same-sex couples or recognize nuptials performed in other states. Meanwhile, Illinois lawmakers adjourned a day early without taking action on marriage equality, despite pressure from advocates on both sides of the debate. It's unclear whether legislators will consider the bill in the second half of the fall session, beginning
November 5th. The fall session, referred to as the "veto session", handles bills that were vetoed by the governor as well as bills that passed one legislative house but not the other before the regular session ended. Governor Jerry Brown (Reuters) Lambda Legal filed suit in West Virginia on behalf of three same-sex couples seeking to reverse the state's same-sexmarriage ban. The lawsuit claims that the state's statute banning same-sex marriage, passed in 2000, violates the couples' right to equal protection under the law. "West Virginia's state motto 'Mountaineers Are Always Free' is hollow until all West Virginians — no matter who they love — have the freedom to marry," Beth Littrell, a staff attorney with Lambda Legal, said in a statement. (The Washington Post) Michigan's same-sex marriage ban will be decided in a trial next year. U.S. District Judge Bernard Friedman, who in June refused to throw out a lesbian couple's lawsuit against the state's ban on adoption by unmarried couples, announced that the plaintiffs are "entitled to their day in court. ... The parties must be afforded the opportunity to develop their own record in this matter with the benefit of calling witnesses and subjecting them to crossexamination." The decision disappointed marriage equality advocates, many of whom had gathered outside the courthouse in hopes that Friedman would rule immediately against the ban. (USA Today) The California Republican Party is backing an effort to repeal the state’s new transgender student protection law. At a convention in Anaheim, state legislators voted in favor of endorsing candidates who have pledged to oppose the School Success and Opportunity Act, which guarantees students the right to use facilities consistent with their gender identity. Openly gay Republican vice chairman Greg Gandrud warned against trying to repeal the law. (ThinkProgress.org) California Governor Jerry Brown (D) signed legislation that will allow children to have more than two legal parents. Democratic state Senator Mark Leno, who wrote the bill, said it would ensure custody for same-sex couples who have a child with an opposite-sex biological parent. Brown had previously vetoed a similar bill, but did not comment on what factors led to his reversal. (Los Angeles Times) A rural northeast Mississippi community discriminated against a lesbian woman by denying her a license to reopen a bar catering to gays and lesbians. A federal lawsuit making this claim was filed by the Alabama-based Southern Poverty Law Center, saying the town of Shannon discriminated against Pat "PJ" Newton and violated her civil rights to free speech and equal protection. It accused the town, the mayor, and the aldermen of denying the license because Newton's bar would cater to gays and lesbians, and not because she failed to meet any criteria for opening and operating a business in Shannon. (Reuters) (continued on page 9)
November 2013
CHALLENGE
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N o v e m b e r 2 0 1 3 Q- m u n it y C a l e n d a r Recurri n g Con t act I n form at i on
* Hackensack Peer Support Groups: 800-508-7577; www.njbuddies.org † Pride Center, Highland Park: 732-846-2232; www.pridecenter.org ‡ Hudson Pride Connections Center: 201-963-4779; HudsonPride.org λ LGBT Center Rainbow Lounge, Princeton: www.princeton.edu/lgbt ♦ North Jersey PrimeTimers: www.meetup.com/North-Jersey-Primetimers Every Sunday 10:45 am - MCC of Christ the Liberator, Highland Park; tombohache10 @ gmail.com Noon - St. Francis of Assisi Church, Glen Ridge; 973-731-7765; stfrancisnj.org 2:30 pm - Liberation in Truth Unity Fellowship Church, Newark; 973-621-2100 5:30 pm - Central Jersey Rainbows Bowling League, Bradley Beach; CJRBowling @ gmail.com Every Monday 10:30 am - The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info @ hyacinth.org 7:00 pm - GAAMC, Morristown (see page 2) 7:00 pm - Bowling, Union; merenl @ comcast.net 7:00 pm - S.E.L.F. HIV Men’s support group, Hackensack * 7:30 pm - New Jersey Gay Men’s Chorus choir practice, Princeton; 609-396-7774; www.njgmc.org 7:30 pm - Overeaters Anonymous, Highland Park † 8:00 pm - Bowling, Green Brook; qcrollers @ aol.com Every Tuesday 12:30 pm - The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info @hyacinth.org 4:00 pm - Treatment Adherence Support Group, Jersey City; 201-432-1134; info @hyacinth.org 6:30 pm - TransView, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - NA Group, Jersey City ‡ 7:30 pm - Tuesday Night Lesbian Connection, Bound Brook; 908-791-3764 7:30 pm - Men’s HIV support group, Asbury Park; 732-775-5084; apstillpoz @ yahoo.com 7:30 pm - Positive Yoga, Oradell * 8:45 pm - Bowling, Belleville; 973-256-5936; NJGLB @ aol.com 9:00 pm - Bowling, Jersey City; 201-933-6028; JoeyNJ @ aol.com 9:15 pm - Bowling, Edison; 732-548-4550; cnjgbl @ yahoo.com
01 Fri 7:00 pm - Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack * 8:00 pm - Karaoke, Highland Park † 02 Sat 2:30 pm - First and Third for GLBTI youth, Princeton; 609-683-5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:30 pm - Wome's Arts & Music Performance Series, Highland Park † 8:00 pm - Fall ClubFest, Woodbridge † 03 Sun 3:30 pm - Tragedy of a Friendship, Montclair ♦ 4:00 pm - Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-509-0118; Dignitymetronj @ msn.com 6:30 pm - Gay Men’s Opera Club; 732-249-9034; hagol @ msn.com 04 Mon 7:00 pm - Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero @ umdnj.edu 7:00 pm - Lesbian Hot Topics, Ocean; schiffman @ rocketmail.com 7:30 pm - Young Men's Social Network, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - "Love Lost in Translation: A Fresh Approach to Homosexuality and the Bible", Princeton λ 05 Tue 5:00 pm - Out on the Town Happy Hour, Princeton λ
Every Wednesday 10:30 am - The Wellness Community, Jersey City; 201-432-1134; info @hyacinth.org 2:30 pm - RU Pride, Newark; 973-353-5716 6:00 pm - Positive People peer support group, Hackensack * 6:00 pm - SAGE, Jersey City ‡ 7:30 pm - Men’s Living Out group, Highland Park; njwarrior @ aol.com † 7:30 pm - Gay Men’s Coming Out group, Highland Park; pdumpert @ gmail.com † Every Thursday 6:00 pm - Our Youth weekly support group, Jersey City; www.myspacenj.org 6:30 pm - Ties Like Mine, Jersey City ‡ 6:30 pm - Double Jeopardy peer support group, Hackensack * 6:30 pm - Hudson Men of Pride, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - Sexual Assault Survivor Support, Princeton; www.hitops.org 7:30 pm - Rainbows on Cleveland Street, Orange; 973-256-5936; rbowsoncleveland @ aol.com 7:30 pm - Writers group, Highland Park † Every Friday 3:00 pm - Youth Connect, Jersey City ‡ Monday – Friday 8:00 am to 4:00 pm - HIV testing, Morristown; 973-889-6802 9:00 am to 1:00 pm - HIV testing, Asbury Park; 800-947-0020 10:00 am to 5:00 pm - HiTOPS Health Center, Princeton; www.hitops.org; 609-683-5155 x 211
6:00 pm - Gay Pride Business Network, New Brunswick; www.GPBN.net 6:30 pm - Le Corsaire, Cranfoed ♦ 7:30 pm - LGBT Fellowship, Belleville; 973-751-0616 7:30 pm - ComeOUT & Play, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - NJ Women Coming Out Support, Highland Park † 06 Wed 5:30 pm - Hudson County HIV/AIDS Services Planning Council, Jersey City ‡ 6:30 pm - AA Group, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - "Collective Liberation and the LGBTQA Movement", Princeton λ 7:00 pm - Slavic Film Festival, You I Love, Princeton λ 7:30 pm - Gay Dad’s discussion group, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - Jersey Boys of Leather, Highland Park † 07 Thu 7:00 pm - Coffee Night, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com 08 Fri 5:00 pm - Class of 2014 Happy Hour, Princeton λ 7:30 pm - Rock Band/Guitar Hero, Highland Park † 09 Sat 12:30 pm - IPG Gender Spectrum Support Group for Youth & Parents, Jersey City ‡ 1:00 pm - Youth Drop-In, Highland Park †
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Women of Pride, Jersey City ‡ Tosca, Long Branch ♦ Movie Social, Highland Park † Bingo and Drag Show, Montclair ♦ Dignity New Brunswick gay Catholic liturgy; 732-968-9263; dignitynb @ earthlink.net
10 Sun 4:00 pm - Out Pagans Discussion Group, Highland Park † 6:00 pm - Gay Men’s Classical Song Club, Kingston; pbrown02 @ worldnet.att.net 11 Mon 6:30 pm - HIV Testing, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Morris County, Mendham; 973-727-5288; pflag.morris @ verizon.net 7:30 pm - PFLAG, Princeton; 609-663-5155; www.pflagprinceton.org 7:30 pm - FetChat, Highland Park † 12 Tue 6:00 pm 7:00 pm 7:30 pm 7:30 pm 8:00 pm
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13 Wed 3:00 pm 7:30 am 7:30 pm 6:00 pm
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Queering the Color Line, Princeton λ Bisexual Bicurious, Highland Park † Yoga for Men, Highland Park † Pride Center Board Meeting, Highland Park † Men's Social Night, Highland Park †
Driving Range, Wayne ♦ Living Out Women, Highland Park † Board Meeting, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com Gay Pride Business Network, Asbury Park; www. GPBN.net 6:30 pm - North Jersey Prime Timers' monthly meetup, Little Falls ♦ 6:30 pm - AA Group, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - Slavic Film Festival, Fine Dead Girls, Princeton λ 14 Thu 4:00 pm - "Performing Displacement: A Workshop", Princeton λ 7:00 pm - Qspot Book Club, Point Pleasant; outdoorgirl @ optonline.net 7:00 pm - Under the Rainbow, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - PFLAG of North Jersey, South Orange; 908-789-7489; pflagwaver @ aol.com 7:30 pm - Alternate Thursdays, Montclair; kjdinkin @ comcast.net 7:30 pm - Dare to Dream, Princeton λ 7:30 pm - Kollege of Kink, Highland Park † 8:00 pm - Booked for Supper, Highland Park † 15 Fri 9:00 am - "Understanding Sexual Offender Dynamics on College Campuses", Princeton λ 1:00 pm - "Understanding the Impact of Trauma", Princeton λ 3:00 pm - "Understanding Our Role as a Community - Understanding Sexual Violence Dynamics", Princeton λ 7:00 pm - Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack * 7:30 pm - Dignity New Brunswick social; 732-968-9263; dignitynb @ earthlink.net 8:00 pm - Out of the Box open mic night, Highland Park (Sign-up begins 7:30); outoftheboxinfo @ mac.com 16 Sat 2:30 pm - First and Third for GLBTI youth, Princeton; 609-683-5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:00 pm - Rainbow Bowling, Bradley Beach; 732-774-4540 7:00 pm - NJ Gay Film Society & Potluck Dinner Club, location TBA; gayfilms @ bigfoot.com 7:30 pm - Games Night, Highland Park †
17 Sun 1:30 pm - NJ Statewide Trans Day of Remembrance Service, Princeton λ 4:00 pm - Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-509-0118; Dignitymetronj @ msn.com 4:00 pm - TrueSelves trans support group, Highland Park † 18 Mon 4:30 pm - Critical Encounters, Lovelace, Princeton λ 6:30 pm - Dinner at Charlie Brown's, Wayne ♦ 7:00 pm - Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero @ umdnj.edu 7:00 pm - Lesbian Hot Topics, Ocean; schiffman @ rocketmail.com 7:30 pm - Young Men's Social Network, Highland Park † 19 Tue 7:00 pm 6:00 pm 6:30 pm 7:30 pm
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7:30 pm 7:30 pm 8:00 pm 8:00 pm -
ComeOUT & Play, Highland Park † Being LGBT in Academia Dinner Series, Princeton λ Spartacus, Cranford ♦ Lesbian Alliance of Princeton; 609-924-8174; Loisj @ msn.com PFLAG of Hunterdon County, Flemington; 908-752-1370; pflaghc @ yahoo.com Caregiver Support Group, Highland Park † PFLAG of Bergen County, Paramus; 201-287-0318; www.bergenpflag.org NJ Women, Secaucus; info @ njwomen.org
20 Wed 7:00 pm - Slavic Film Series, The Country Teacher, Princeton λ 7:30 pm - United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez @ comcast.net 8:30 pm - Bowling, Boonton ♦ 21 Thu 6:00 pm - New Volunteer Orientation, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - GAAMC board meeting, Morristown All GAAMC members are invited to attend. 7:00 pm - GLSEN Training, Highland Park † 7:00 pm - PCNJ HIV Planning Committee, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - NJ Women Coming Out Support Group, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Northwest NJ, Sparta; 973-729-9909 7:30 pm - Volunteer Group Meeting, Jersey City ‡ 22 Fri 7:30 pm - Living Soulfully, Highland Park † 8:00 pm - Shabbat service; njlgh.onefireplace.com 23 Sat 1:00 pm - Youth Drop-In, Highland Park † 1:00 pm - Women of Pride, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - Gay Bowling, Asbury Lanes, Asbury Park; 732-776-6160 24 Sun 3:00 pm - The Lavender Cinema Club, Highland Park † 25 Mon 5:00 pm - Out on the Town Happy Hour, Princeton λ 7:30 pm - FetChat, Highland Park † 26 Tue 3:00 pm - Drop-In Hours for the LGBT Community, Princeton λ 7:00 pm - Bisexual, Bi-curious and Allies Support Group, Highland Park † 7:00 pm - Stonewall Democrats, Highland Park † 7:30 pm - Yoga for Men, Highland Park † 8:00 pm - Men's Social, Highland Park † 27 Wed 6:00 pm - Gay Pride Business Network, Asbury Park; www. GPBN.net 7:30 pm - Living Out Women, Highland Park † 28 Thu 7:00 pm - Under the Rainbow, Highland Park †
November 2013
CHALLENGE
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Gleanings
(continued from page 6) The U. S. Olympic Committee added a ban on sexual orientation discrimination to its policies. Months ahead of the Winter Olympics in Russia, where controversy surrounds a law that targets homosexuality, the USOC board adopted the measure after its chairman, Larry Probst, said he would support adding sexual orientation to the International Olympic Committee's nondiscrimination policies. USOC chief executive officer Scott Blackmun said, “[O]ur board voted to amend the USOC’s code of conduct to include specific mention of sexual orientation in our own non-discrimination policy.” Regarding Russia’s antiLGBT propaganda law, Blackmun noted his support for athletes who have spoken out in opposition to it. “The fact that we do not think it is our role to advocate for a change in the Russian law does not mean that we support the law, and we do not.” He said the USOC is “actively seeking more clarity from the IOC on what will and will not be regarded as violations of Rule 50 in the Games environment.” Rule 50 bans demonstration or political, religious, or racial propaganda from any Olympic sites, venues or other areas. (NPR.org, BuzzFeed) A bill before Russia's Duma that would remove children of LGBT parents from their families has reportedly been withdrawn pending unspecified changes from its author, Alexei Zhuravlyov. Observers speculate that the bill was withdrawn to deflect attention from the country's anti-LGBT laws ahead of the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi. The bill is supported by President Vladimir Putin. (Advocate.com) National Organization for Marriage [sic] President Brian Brown has been accused in an investigative report of pushing for Russian legislators to adopt a set of anti-LGBT laws this summer. According to the report, issued by progressive group People for the American Way on their website Right Wing Watch, Brown told the Russian Duma's foreign affairs committee in June that marriage equality represented "a real threat to rights" and argued for laws restricting LGBT adoption in a TV interview. "Right now you're having the fight about adoption, but the adoption issue is indivisible from the marriage issue," Brown said. "If you don't defend your values now, I'm afraid we're going to see very negative developments all over the world." (Advocate.com) Lawmakers in Moldova have voted to repeal the country's anti-LGBT "propaganda" ban, which is similar to the one put in place in Russia this summer. The law, which was passed with the support of the country's Orthodox Church and Communist Party, was repealed in hopes of bolstering the country's chances of being admitted to the European Union, Daniel Reynolds writes. Lawmakers plan to take up LGBT nondiscrimination laws next. (Gay Star News) Croatia will hold a referendum on December 1st to consider changes to the country’s constitution that would ban samesex marriage, a parliamentary commission decided on Wednesday. The Commission on the Constitution voted to hold a referendum on whether to define marriage as being between a man and a woman. Croatia currently has minimal partnership protections in the form of “cohabitation agreements.” Croatia officially joined the European Union on July 1st, and its LGBTI rights record came under close scrutiny in the lead-up. It was required to adopt a law banning discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation as a condition of EU membership. (BuzzFeed)
Antigay extremists in Podgorica, Montenegro were met with tear gas after disrupting an LGBT peace march by pelting attendees with rocks and firebombs. Sunday's government-sanctioned event was heavily guarded by police, but the 1,500 extremists attempted to break through the barrier of police officers. 20 officers out of the 2,000 on duty were hurt in the altercation, 40 of the extremists were injured, and about 60 of the antigay extremists were arrested. The march was the second attempt to hold a peaceful LGBT pride march in Montenegro. The first attempt in July was met with death threats by 200 protesters. (Advocate.com) British MP Geraint Davies (Labour) plans to introduce a bill that would ban gay "conversion therapy" for all U.K. citizens. Similar bans passed in California and New Jersey this year have focused on youths. The bill has 53 co-sponsors from across the political spectrum. Geraint earlier this year said conversion therapy was “based on outdated views and dodgy science.” (Gay Star News) The United States Postal Service will soon issue a stamp commemorating LGBT icon Harvey Milk, as announced by the Harvey Milk Foundation. Milk, who made history as California’s first openly LGBT elected official after being elected to the San Francisco Board of Supervisors in 1977, will be the first openly LGBT politician to appear on a U.S. stamp. The Postal Service is expected to begin issuing the stamp next year. (GayPolitics.com) The Boy Scouts of America chose former U.S. Secretary of Defense and CIA director Robert Gates as its next president. Gates will face the task of repairing divisions in the organization from a heated debate over accepting gay scouts. As Defense Secretary, Gates supported President Barack Obama's withdrawal of the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy that prevented gays and lesbians from serving openly in the military. Congress repealed the ban in 2010 and it was lifted in 2011. Gates, a former Eagle Scout, is due to begin his twoyear term in May 2014. He will succeed Wayne Perry, who led the scouting organization through the emotionally charged debate in May when the council voted to lift the century-old ban on openly gay scouts. (NBC News) John Arthur, a marriage equality advocate who made headlines after a federal judge ordered Ohio state officials to recognize his Maryland marriage to partner James Obergefell, passed away on October 22nd of advanced amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (aka Lou Gehrig's Disease). The pair, who had been together for over 20 John Arthur and James Obergefell years, were married on July 11th and filed suit on their return to Ohio. The couple's victory will allow them to be buried alongside each other in Arthur's family plot, reserved for only immediate family and their spouses. (Advocate.com)
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Dancing To Architecture™ Music Reviews & News with a Queer Ear by Bill Realman Stella
LOU REED 1942 - 2013 I have multiple, equally true alternative titles for this piece: LOU REED TOUCHED ME. I BLEW OFF LOU REED. LOU REED IS IN MY HANDSHAKE COLLECTION. LOU REED TOUCHED ME WHERE I DIDN'T WANT HIM TO, AND I'M FOREVER GRATEFUL. yeah… they all sound stupid and dirty… because none of them refer to anything sexual. But they are true. The one other really great title of an article about Lou after his death came from Zachary Lipez, writing appropriately enough for Noisey.Vice.com. (You can't make this stuff up.) It, simply, was this: LOU REED: NO EPITAPHS This is my story. The short version. I'm barely a teenager and only in my private IN HIS WAY, REED'S A CROONER IN A TIN PAN late-night moments do I ALLEY TRADITION, A POPULAR SONG FACTORY indulge in Gay lust fanta- LABORER, BUT TAKEN OVER BY WORKERS ON sies, when "Walk On The A WILDCAT STRIKE, ONE WHO HAS WADED Wild Side" hits AM hit ra- THROUGH BEATNIK-POLLUTED FOLKSTER dio. Only preceded by The STREAMS TO FIND COMPATRIOT JOHNNY CASH Kinks' "Lola" (in my limited STANDING ON THE BANKS, FLATTENING experience), it just adds MELODIES CLOSE TO SPEECH BUT INCITING A to my adolescent confu- S O F T R E V O L U T I O N , S TA R T I N G A N sion - and I'm compound- URBAN/SUBURBAN UPRISING OF PUNK'S ing confusion faster than JITTERY, BLUNT, BUT SENSITVE ASSAULT OF A my interest is rising. POET'S VOICE — AN ESSENTIAL Jump to 1976, and high SOMETHING-IN-THE-AIR WHEN THE TASTE OF school, and my best friend SUBURBAN ANGST FLAVORED "URBAN" RAP Richard's older brother POETS AND GAVE HIP HOP AN ALMOST went to Rhode Island UNTRACEABLE ELEMENT OF SURPRISE. ALL IS School of Design with ART, ALL IS POETRY, ALL IS ROCK AND ROLL. these semi-amateur musicians who are taking ad- Portrait ©Timothy Greenfield-Sanders vantage of the burgeoning punk and New Wave scene in dirty New York City to play at CBGB's. My friend's brother's friends are the band Talking Heads. He takes me to see them a couple times there. They don't want to jinx it, but news is they not only have a record contract with a major, but they recording and it's going well. The final time we get to see them together at CBGB, it's Spring 1977, the debut album isn't yet released, and there's a buzz about them in hip circles. Everyone wants to see them, possibly the Next Big Thing. Richard and I, both still 17, get to CBGB early, very early, not just 'cause we heard it'll probably be packed, but Richard's brother passes along the knowledge that the best chance to get in when neither of us are legal is to get there as early as possible. It was more exciting to get in underage than it was for me to drink. No small feat: Not only are we in, we're early enough to score a table in front. Like, touch-the-stage in front. And the buzz rush does arrive. Did I need to mention we're nerds, not punks, making us more brats for being there than if we were punk wannabees? Brattier still because we've met the members of the band? And here comes Tina, my ego seriously thinks she's coming to talk to us, Tina Weymouth of Talking Heads, this band that almost no one out of town has ever heard of that's hot in a hole in the wall bar in down-and-out NYC, in the down-and-outest Bowery, instead asks us whether it would be OK with us, because we got there before
they could reserve a table after all, if Mister Lou Reed sat with us? "Oh. Of course Tina! Lou Reed? Really? I love Berlin!" Am I just elaborating with the detail that Tina admonished me to take it easy on Lou, that he was really very shy? I don't recall whether I was dismissive, wasn't listening to her (brat) or whether I made it up later. You mean, on top of all this excitement, I get to not just meet, but sit with Lou Reed? You mean, reader, you think I thought I was gonna behave? Much as my ego was battered by what seemed at the time as my unique experiences of adolescence, very tentative peeks out of the closet and anti-intellectual peers, I was shocked that the man sitting at "my" table wasn't willing to engage in banter with my witty manchild self. If you ever want to manipulate me into behaving, simply revert me to my 17 year old self, and act like a stoned-ondowners, noncommunicative, excited to be there, bored by me and my friend lump.
That's not entirely true. Eventually the shock wore thin, and because of or despite being a little stoned, I had a patented bright idea for how to get revenge on Reed for putting up with his silent treatment of us. When it came time to leave, I quickly stood up, grabbed my backpack up and slung in onto my back, held out my hand (He took it! He automatically took my hand in his limp fist, and he's shaking my hand!) and said "Lou, it's been great not talking to you." And I stomped away. Cut past how WRSU was shut down when I played his profanitypeppered live album after 11 PM in 1979. Past how knowing Robert Quine was his guitarist won me tickets to someone else's show. Past his New York, the last great '80's album, also the first great 90s album, and past the "Halloween Parade" and the "Dirty Blvd". Past Magic and Loss. Cut to 2001? 02? Funny how I don't well recall which recent year. But that one year I volunteered at GLAAD's Media Awards at the Marriott Marquis in New York, I was happy to learn Lou Reed and Laurie Anderson would be presenters that night. Then it struck me that I had an opportunity to repair my karma from the night Lou sat with me and Richard at CBGB. If I could move myself into just the right position, I could be within an arm's length of him when he walks a red carpet-like path to the ballroom entrance. I could offer him my hand again. Maybe he'd shake it. And I wouldn't say anything stupid this time.
(continued on page 15) Dancing To Architecture ©2013 Bill Stella. All ©, ® & ™ items included for review purposes are ©, ® & ™ their respective owners. The stylized Q indicates albums by (or significantly contributed to by) Out Bisexuals, Gay Men, Lesbians and Transgendered persons. GAAMC is pronounced "GAY-mick".
November 2013
CHALLENGE
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Media Outage™ Queer Clippings from print and web sources by Bill Realman Stella "About a Girl" by Sabrina Rubin Erdely ~ Rolling Stone #1195, November 7, 2013 (Paul McCartney cover) Another heart-wrenching, revealing article in Rolling Stone this time about transgender kids. But not just kids as most of us familiar with the issue would understand them: trans Teens. This is a story about a self-identified transgendered six-year-old, the extraordinarily supportive, protective, listening parents she has, and their struggle with her school and her community: By the time Coy Mathis was four years old, he knew one thing for sure: He wasn't a boy. ... "The school is being mean to me," Coy said after being pulled out of first grade. "They're telling me I'm a boy when I'm really a girl."
Paul Berge, Editorial Cartoon October 17, 2013 Disclaimer: Out of respect for the talents and craft of cartoonists, I will not reprint cartoons in full without permission (unlike too many bloggers and columnists). Not even when I dislike the work and need to comment about it.
Paul Berge is an iffy editorial cartoonist. He's another one of those "He's gay; he's producing "gay content" so of course you like him?" creators whose quality doesn't really rise above the level of pandering to the gay ghetto most of the time. Worse, since he's an editorial cartoonist — a line of work I live in absolute total awe of, and his work is about "gay stories in the news", "...and you're a gay news junkie, aren't you?", it's a double whammy or more over how much I'm supposed to love him. But don't. Mostly. Sure, he's of the stronglyinfluenced-by Garry Trudeau (Doonesbury) school (note the nose on the character speaking in the cartoon above) and quite possibly also by Tim Barela (Leonard and Larry), two great "Can Brandy Clark Save Country Music?" by David Cantwell on Slate.com (for web link, see Challenge online at issuu.com/gaamc /docs). Brandy Clark and Shane McAnally are the co-writers of "Follow Your Arrow", the song I most focused on from Kelly Musgraves' Same Trailer, Different Park - still among my five favorite albums of the year in an issue of Challenge from early this year. Oh, look. The mainstream has discovered they (Clark and McAnally) are Gay. Huh. Look at that. And might "save country music" too, maybe, while they're at it: "The country tradition has long given us songs about feeling pride .... Songs about cherishing the small town where you grew up, and songs about feeling trapped there, as well—and ones about feeling both those emotions at the same time. ... But a country music that neglects for too long the down-on-the-ground experiences and feelings of its audience—the marrying and the cheating, the fun and the pain (and the numbing of the pain, and
cartoonists to take on as influences. But I often have to wait months between appearances of Berge cartoons in the Philly Gay News before I read something with insight and wit. Both are requirements, at miminum, for a good editorial cartoon. To be fair from the start, the above is an example of Berge at the height of his figure-drawing abilities: facial expressions, proportions, and character traits dilineated well. And that contrast between the "News Item" and the contents of the word balloon I will grudgingly admit retains enough perception of the bizarre to approach Wit's Territory. But FUCK YOU, Berge if you, or any other FUCKING gay fascist thinks that I will tolerate the implication of that word balloon's text: that I'm required to know the FUCKING rest of that song lyric! Fact: I'm am so FUCKING glad I didn't know that line, even after all the times I've heard that damn song. In fact, when ever I do hear that song, those lines are one of the many reasons I bring my shoulders up high & close to my head, to try to shield my ears. No, I will not identify it, no I do not like it; nor the musical from which it's derived, nor the singer with which it's most identified. I've disliked all of the above since near the time of my birth, so, no, I will not return nor allow you to rescind my "gay card" simply for having better than average taste. Except to lampoon them, I will not enjoy them to the end of my days. (continued on page 17) BRANDY CLARK
SHANE MCANALLY: THEN, AND NOW
sometimes the transcendence of it), the promise and the regret and more—is a genre in crisis. Maybe even a genre in need of saving. ... [Clark's new album] 12 Stories is so good that you almost think [she] really could achieve Nashville’s salvation. … “Follow Your Arrow,” … co-written by McAnally and Clark, who are gay, and by Musgraves, who is not, ... has already generated a bit of controversy as a “gay anthem.” Well wouldn't Country Music Salvation-By-Gays just be a kick in the rubber parts! Looks like Steve Grand (see Challenge's Summer 2013 issue) isn't the only All-American Country Music Queer turning mainstream heads.
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New Jersey Marriage Rules (rules, the verb, that is!) Questions and Answers about Same-Sex Marriage in New Jersey Introduced by Allen Neuner and Bill Stella
When civil marriages for same-sex couples became legal in New Jersey on October 21st, Judge Mary Jacobson's decision left many questions unanswered. Some of these questions were addressed in the marriage equality bill that was vetoed by Governor Christie in 2012. Now the state has posted some answers to frequently asked questions at the New Jersey Department of Health website www.state.nj.us/health/vital/faq.shtml#ssm. We felt they warranted reprinting here. If I was married in another state, do I need to enter in a marriage in New Jersey in order to have my marriage recognized in New Jersey? No. Just as with opposite-sex couples, so long as your out-of-state marriage is consistent with the laws and public policy of New Jersey, your marriage is valid and recognized in this State and you will not need to enter into a New Jersey marriage. If I am in a domestic partnership, and enter into a marriage with my current domestic partner, does the domestic partnership automatically dissolve? No. Your domestic partnership will remain intact and will still be on file with the Office of Vital Statistics and Registry after you enter into marriage with your domestic partner. If I am currently in a civil union and wish to enter into marriage, do I have to dissolve my civil union prior to entering into marriage? You will not have to dissolve your civil union in order to enter into marriage so long as you are marrying your current civil union partner. However, if you wish to marry someone other than your civil union partner, then you must have your civil union dissolved before you can enter into marriage with someone else. If I am currently in a civil union and subsequently enter into a marriage with my current civil union partner, what happens to my civil union? Civil unions remain valid. Your civil union will remain intact and will still be on file with the Office of Vital Statistics and Registry after you enter into marriage with your civil union partner.
Will my New Jersey Civil Union automatically convert to a marriage or must I receive a marriage license and thereafter engage in a marriage ceremony in order to be married in New Jersey? Civil unions will not automatically convert to marriages. Civil unions remain valid and couples may continue to enter into civil unions if they so choose. A civil union couple will have to apply for and receive a marriage license and thereafter engage in a marriage ceremony in order to receive a marriage certificate. Can same-sex couples continue to apply for and enter into civil unions? Yes. The Civil Union Act remains in full force and effect. If a same-sex couple is already legally married in another state and wishes to enter into marriage in New Jersey, would the couple be entering into a marriage or a remarriage? The couple would be entering into a remarriage. Any couple married outside of the State that wishes to renew their marriage commitment in New Jersey may do so by applying for and receiving a remarriage license and thereafter engage in a remarriage ceremony, as set forth at N.J.S.A. 37:1-7. The 72 hour waiting period does not apply to remarriages. If I am currently in a civil union and applied for a marriage license with my current civil union partner, must I wait 72 hours before receiving my marriage license? Yes. All individuals, including those already in a civil union, who apply for marriage licenses must comply with the 72 hour waiting period unless a New Jersey Superior Court Judge enters an order waiving the wait period due to emergency circumstances. If I am currently in a civil union and wish to enter into marriage with my current civil union partner, should I apply for a remarriage license or a marriage license? Couples who are currently in a civil union and have not entered in a valid marriage outside of this State must apply for a marriage license, not a remarriage license, and must wait 72 hours before receiving their marriage license.
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Minutes of the GAAMC Board of Trustees Meeting, September 19, 2013 NOTE: These are unapproved minutes of the September meeting.
Attendance Voting Trustees: DeLeeuw, Kennedy, Rase, Rubin, Sauer, Skurna, Suiter Non-Voting Attendees: Allen Neuner The meeting began at 7:18 pm. I. Adoption of minutes: The minutes of the August meeting were unanimously accepted without edits. (Moved, Rase; seconded, Kennedy) II.Old Business: no discussion. III.New Business: Board Service 2014: Written report on file. The Board discussed potential candidates for trustee and officer positions. Gordon offered to speak to some potential candidates for trusteeships, and suggested all candidates present themselves on one night to the membership. International Food Festival: Discussion on who will be bringing what. Workers for setup, serving, and takedown will be needed. IV. Reports:
President: Andy Skurna — No report. Acting Treasurer: Andy Skurna — Written report on file. The Board discussed methods of fundraising. Pride Events Committee: Mickey Suiter — No report. Challenge: Allen Neuner — No report. October 15 is the deadline for submissions. Folding and stuffing will be September 30. Allen suggested the possibility of charging nonmembers for copies of Challenge at the front desk. The Board will look into ways of making Challenge more costeffective. Programs: Sherri Rase — Written report and calendar in Dropbox. Discussion Group Resources: Gordon Sauer — Written report and calendar in Dropbox. V. Save These Dates: Sept 23, $1.98 Beauty Pageant; Oct 14, International Food Festival; Oct 17, next Board meeting VI. Ideas & Suggestions: Sherri suggested GAAMC purchase an ad or offer an ad swap for the Mr. and Ms. NJ Leather Competition brochure. The Board continued discussion of using Meetup as a publicity source. VII. Adjournment: Motion to adjourn passed unanimously (Moved, Sauer; seconded, Rase). The meeting adjourned at 8:20 pm.
KEVIN P. SUSZKO, PC
Enter by Tony Puma
Certified Public Accountant © MMXIII
That gay bar I never entered so I fooled myself about myself and all those inside and me outside by inside myself alone and afraid unsure and closeted (as they say) to step outside myself to step inside the gay bar to admit to myself and be OUT and true to my inside feelings that those outside will see and say you are gay; When did this happen? When did you know? When did you come-out? How do you feel now, I mean, inside. . .
- TAX PLANNING & PREPARATION - FINANCIAL PLANNING - A CCOUNTING SERVICES - DAY & EVENING APPOINTMENTS - OFFICES IN NEW JERSEY & NYC Phone: 973–376–4121 P. O. Box 701 Short Hills, NJ 07078 E-Mail: KPSCPA@GMAIL.COM
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GAY ACTIVIST ALLIANCE IN MORRIS COUNTY
Officers President (President@GAAMC.org) — Andy Skurna VP Community Services (Info@GAAMC.org) — Kerry Dinkin VP Operations (Operations@GAAMC.org)— John DeLeeuw Secretary (Secretary@GAAMC.org) — Gordon Sauer Treasurer (Treasurer@GAAMC.org) — vacant Trustees Sue Harris, Ron Kennedy, Sherri Rase, Mitch Rubin, Mickey Suiter, Alexa Vasios Committee Chairs & Functional Officers Archivist — Mickey Suiter (Archives@GAAMC.org) By-Laws Review Committee — Andy Skurna Challenge Editor — Allen Neuner (Challenge@GAAMC.org) Discussion Group Resources Committee — Gordon Sauer (Discussions@GAAMC.org) Information Committee — Mitch Rubin (FreeLibrary@GAAMC.org) Parliamentarian — Allen Neuner Pride Events Committee — Mickey Suiter Pride Guide Committee — Andy Skurna (PrideGuide@GAAMC.org) Program Committee — Sherri Rase (Programs@GAAMC.org) Webmaster — Andy Skurna (Webmaster@GAAMC.org)
GAAMC, the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, has served New Jersey’s gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, and intersexed communities since 1972. GAAMC is a notfor-profit volunteer-run organization that provides social, educational, and outreach programs. GAAMC also offers opportunities for individuals to become politically active on issues related to the GLBTI communities. Our intent is to maintain a positive, healthy, respectful, and supportive environment in a safe space. Meetings are held every Monday evening at the Morristown Unitarian Fellowship, 21 Normandy Heights Road, Morristown, NJ (near the Morris Museum). Discussion groups usually meet from 7:00 to 8:00. The evening's program usually starts shortly after 8:00. Refreshments are available. For program information, check our homepage at www.GAAMC.org. Members and non-members are always welcome. Annual membership dues are: Regular, $40/single, $70/couple; Students/Seniors, $30/single, $60/couple. Those looking to help out at GAAMC can contact Kerry Dinkin at Info@GAAMC.org. How to reach GAAMC Mail: PO Box 137, Convent Station, NJ 07961 Telephone: 973-285-1595 E-Mail: info@gaamc.org Home page: www.gaamc.org Mail List: groups.yahoo.com/subscribe/gaamc Facebook: www.facebook.com/gaamc Challenge online edition: issuu.com/gaamc/docs
PREVIEWS OF COMING ATTRACTIONS! November 11th GLBT Elder Care
November 18th Why We're Grateful
See "GAAMC Events", page 2, for more details!
November 25th Thanksgiving!
November 2013 (continued from page 10) So I did. With just a little maneuvering, I got into just the right place. Then some schmuck-nobody, paparazzi photographer came through, belligerently insisting that everyone smile for his camera, ("C'mon! You HAVE TO SMILE for me! It's for a hot new website! Don't be a dick!" he would say) totally cheesing up the good will I was trying restore. I had to think of some better plan. I had to say something to get Lou Reed's attention before he saw me, to compete with Mr. Blowhard Paparazzi-head, and stay unobtrusive and respectful yet in-range. Extending my hand, I used only these words as Reed approached: "Thank you Lou. Thank you, Mister Reed." Maybe the third time I said it, Lou Reed took my hand and, gently, shook it. And a little of my bad karma vanished. Who cares that the second handshake allowed me to dare to
imagine that I might approach him again someday and that I might not fuck it up this time. But he wasn't the only prickly musician in the sea of tortured artists to whom I intended casual friendliness but was stopped. I didn't try again with Reed. I was never his friend. Who cares. Reed took up Tai Chi, and re-
mained in love with Laurie Anderson, and did what mattered.
I'm still no convert to some core tenets attributed to Reed's music: I turn toward melody before I do energy, for instance. But I also believe there is no shame nor soul-sapping contradiction in raising up great music and poetry built from materials others discarded. Call Rock and Punk and Hip Hop, the shit they called garbage, what it is: higher art, transformational, highest human connection. Reed was one of the men whose music, whose art, didn't settle for received wisdoms and easy, illusory answers to How to Live a Life Well. He put it out there, an obstacle, shifting my path, an example of how to aspire to speak up and have my say when I didn't know I had a voice. And he taught by example how to recognize great voices, voices both unconventional and audacious. Thank you Lou. Thank you, Mister Reed.
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Yeah, the Lou Reed story yet again messes up my promise to write about Justin Vivian Bond, Sean Kagalis, and Jay Saturn. However I must offer A CORRECTION AND APOLOGY for misspelling Nhojj's name last issue. Nhojj gave a vocal performance at Easton Mountain's Out In The Woods Queer Music Festival I was thrilled to experience. He earned my admiration and respect, so I knew how his name is spelled, and I should have caught myself. (His 2008 album Soul Comfort (link) has my recommendation.) Q ◂ Scott Free's intensely sarcastic new song "Happy Pride Day Moscow," a protest rant to remind us that, dammit, sometimes music does make a diff, rang so incessantly through my mind as I read Andy Skurna's "It's A Small World" on this issue's page 1 that I had to fit its lyrics at the article's conclusion. You owe it to yourself to hear this ska-punk blast of outrage. Download the single for free at TheScottFree.bandcamp.com, and see its gripping new video at: youtu.be/Jlp-w19o11c (Screenshots below) From that YouTube page: "Scott Free's musical sarcastic response to Russia declaring their anti-gay laws are applied equally to all people, and therefore not discriminatory. Illustration by Darren Clark. Still photographs [‌] from AllOut.org, WoduMedia.com, TheWildMagazine.com, CBC.ca, Telegraph.co.uk, TowleRoad.com, RFERL.org, GayLiberation.net, EndBigotryIn V e n a n g o C o u n t y. b l o g s p o t . c o m , B u d a p e s t P r i d e . h u , HuffingtonPost.com, HumanRightsFirst.org, Catholic.org, NPR.org, Queerty.com, PinkNews.co.uk, UKGayNews.org.uk, 76crimes.com, DemocraticUnderground.com, VOANews.com, S a m e S a m e . c o m . a u , L G B T- Te a c h e r s . b l o g s p o t . c o m , TheAtlanticWire.com, Spiegel.de, RT.com, TheGuardian.com."
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November 2013 (continued from page 13) I hated being put in a box as a kid, and I remain appalled how gay people put each other in numerous boxes to this day, even as we reach some of our political and social goals for equality. To fight back with metaphorical judo, when I was barely no longer a kid, at age 17, I co-wrote, co-directed and co-produced "The Box Movie" with my best friend and my girlfriend (yes). A never completed short film made on Super8 stock, we intended it to parody the predominant high school lesson each of us were aching to escape: the conformity of these stupid-run fiefdoms, the cliques and the stereotypes and the tracks we were put on and the repressive, frustrating, exasperating, hopefully not inescapable boxes we got put in. As an adult I'm beyond hating it, past self-recrimination, on to working to keep kindled that fire for Individual Personhood and Creativity we often call Hope. How fucking DARE you compound that frustration to the nth power by presuming we know that cartoon's punchline! The utter lack of insight! You don't realize that you're not satirizing Kuwaiti policy makers so much as you're making an awful, crippling, culturally stultified deadend of a stand in as a signifier for all of us, just so you can meet a weekly deadline, just so you can attempt a joke? It's "the gay joke" as an in-joke, wouldn't you say? Right? It's really making fun of the Kuwaiti, for being so dumb that they've stereotyped us all into one type, right? Right? At least let on that maybe, maybe, you've put that much thought into it, your previous work as evidence to the contrary to the side! Even so, the joke requires we get the reference, and the reference has become so sadly beside the point of anything that's really Gay anymore that it only functions at best to set up an us vs. them for a chance to get the joke. Any research, even just asking one's boyfriend (which is what I did) to learn the reference, destroys whatever potential for humor resided. At worst the joke assumes the same stereotyping of our character as Gay folks that we've struggled and often succeeded in distancing ourselves from — EXCEPT IN THE MUSIC WE GAY PEOPLE ARE ASSOCIATED WITH — BECAUSE WE INSIST ON CONTINUING TO IDENTIFY OURSELVES EXCLUSIVELY WITH A NARROW FRAGMENT OF OUR TALENTS!!! There are reasons I pay attention to Gay people who make music, and those reasons are not to inscribe in some misty-memoried, hallowed hall of faux-fabulousness a history of greatness that is the exclusionary province of make-do closet-keepers. What makes me sickest of all is that Berge probably does know his reading audience well-enough that most of them probably do get the sickeningly self-loathing, self-disrespecting joke. It sickens me (often literally) that some gay folk are just as prone to serving it up as anyone. Some social workers and shrinks call it toxic. I call it "Conformity Poisoning". Ask me sarcastically again to tell you how I really feel, tell me again to lighten up, how this is "just normal Gay" and I'll do to you what the doc is doing in the cartoon, but not so professional or friendly-like. Only one good defense is known to prevent a potential Conformity Poisoning from worming itself into your brain, and that is to confront the toxic speech with two words spoken from the heart - and from your gut: Fuuuuuuuuuuuck Yoooooooooooooooooouuuuuu!!!
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SPECIAL ONLINE PHOTO FEATURE
The Opposite of Conformity Poisoning: Stills from Michael Franti's new musicvideo "Life Is Better With You" Inclusion & diversity above & beyond the call of duty.
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