2007 by Galenicals

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REVIEWS

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4: Paqe 5: Paqe 6: Paqe 9: Paoe 11 : Paqe {2: Paoe 13: Paqe 15: Paoe

Letter from the Galenicals

Blackbao replv to Galenicals letter Andv Levv Exclusfve! Walkinq Aids 'The NHS runs on sexual tension' 'On the Wards'

Trauma conference '07 Blaq vour wav throuqh vour Elective

Pub Crawl Pics Paoe 18: Paqe 19: Paqe 22:

23: Paqe 25: Paqe 27: Paqe 28: Paqe

Paoe 29: Paqe

30:

CONTRIBUTORS:

SKIP Bristol MTOSS

Paradiqm Shifts HoroscoPe SPorts News

Surf TriP lo-down Niqella SexPress 241 Restaurant Review

Book Review

With specialthanks to everyone who contributed to Blackbag, especially Harriet O'Neillfor her illustrations for the Front cover, Andy Levy and Nigella Lawson.

Welcome to this issue of BlackBag, We have cheekily hijacked a few column inches to update you on what's goings on behind the scenes in the arazy world of Galenicals. . . . . . .And deny the rumours! Following a complaint after the spoof lecture, we have restricted Toby's input within the committee to that of Coffee and Tea at meetings! I assure you he will have no further input in anything of note or significance. So now that Toby is out of the way who is left in the committee and what are they up to? Secretary Sarah has started a sexual problem column in Bliss magazine. Treasurer Nicki has managed to get membership cards second time round having originally only ordered them fornon-members! President Hugh has Chlamydia for the third time this year! Webmaster Ben (yes his title is that cool!) has been arrested for breaking intemational licensing laws Careers Tom has managed to get himself ajob at Myrell Lynch. His final words to the committee were, "Enjoy the cesspit that is the NHS!" Music George has been offto Band camp and enjoyed herself. Intemational Charlotte has been deported! Ents Shilpy and Amy have had wide success after buying shares in Smirnoff'! Sports Marc and Sophia, following 'Welcome Drinks' should have a baby in July next year. Blackbag have done bugger all! We are still trying to find a role for them!

Now that we have got your attention, on a serious note; what have we done so far? Ents & Events: o Medics Fresh o Fresher's Pub-crawl . Sports Welcome Drinkies . Sports Tour to Birmingham o Careers Evening with Messrs Gargan and Smith o Scrubs events; video ops and suturing workshops Academic Progress. o Guiding and advising the development of the course via various committees . Library - we have negotiated flexibility for students in academies to take out 3-day loans for longer periods on request. . We are guiding the current project to redevelop the Library in the summer '08 so it is student orientated o Third years can now expect two positive and two negative areas for improvement following AERN and TUBES OLSERS. . Via the year rep we have introduced an internet resource for 3'd years to help each other through the respective units. o More money for Academy socials has been set aside. Do please send you proposals to Nicki (treasurer@-eal eni cal s. org. uk) I would like to encourage anyone that doesn't feel involved with Galenicals' to decide what they want to do at Medical School and then use the committee to make this happen. We can help advertise the events and contribute to costs. Keep up to date at www.galenicals.org.uk

3{ugh & loby - Tf?res andTi.ce ?rez

already learned more about bisphosphonates than

I did in my whole 8 weeks of MDEMO. The man has a gift. "But Professor Levy, I'm here to learn about you!". Alana Durack, illustrated by Harriet O' Neill

f,.t-,n'f

We start from the beginning.

Having always been good at

sciences

(surprisingly!?) young Levy joined the queue for

medical school. He was the first person in his

family

to go to

University. Having studied

medicine in Nottingham and completing his house jobs there, he then went to Birmingham and got his membership exams. After 18 months rotating

pathology, neurology, endocrinology and I couldn't believe it either!) and applied for cardiology, he decided to become a GP (I know! interviews.

"But I was completely the wrong sort of person for it. I was just one of the least likely people ever to be a GP. I was just horrid. So I thought I'd do Obs and Gynae".

He applied for everything. Everything. Everything except histopathology - and that was only because looking down a microscope made him "sea sick". He got an Obs and Gynae post at Guys, moved back to London where he grew up, and hated it. "The on-call room was on the labour suite. My house job was a 112 hour a week contract. It was

I left my house at 7.20am - just to be sure to be on time to meet with Prof Levy. True to form, he's arranged an early start. I check in with the porter. He calls up to Prof Levys office - "Andy? Another victim". He sends me up. Fourth floor. Why do I feel like I'm the one being interrogated? I knock on his door. Welcoming as ever - "come in, come in". I've been to his office before and remember being shocked at how small it is. This time it does look a little more spacious, probably because he's gotten rid of some of his DIY materials'since I was there last. But cosy all the same. I congratulate him on being awarded'Tutor of the Year' for the BRI, 3rd years and 5th years the previous day. He is delighted. "Surely you have won awards like that before?" I ask. He says he has won one or two things, but has been given the "two-fingers" by students at the same time, so overall he doesn't know where he stands! This

time it was a clean sweep of unadulterated positivity. And the interview does begin with him asking me questions - "How are you? What are you up to at the moment? An audit? Well, it would be much better use of your time to...." and we spend at least 20 minutes discussing a possible research paper I should embark upon. With the help of Levy and his trusted sidekick - Google - I have 6

just ghastly really". So having done obstetrics and gynaecology he thought "I might as well screw up a year", and so went into paediatrics.

"So I went from being an incompetent obstetrician to an absolutely ridiculous

paediatrician" "I got a job in paediatric

hepatology at Kings which is the most esoteric, highfaluting paediatric

job. So I went from being an obstetrician paediatrician.

incompetent

to an absolutely ridiculous And I absolutely just hated it. I

thought, 'I can't do this, I'll have to go back to medicine'. No-one ever put their arm around your shoulder and said'Right -what do you want to do? How can I help?'. I had no champions. I was a very quiet kind of person. You just wouldn't say boo to a goose. You just didn't know that these Consultants were real people. You just felt they were people you couldn't talk to. And they did nothing to dispel the view that they were God-like creatures. In fact the first time I perceived that they might not be, was one day when I happened to be changing my white coat and the consultant I worked for was changing his. I saw him take a boiled sweet from his pocket. I was taken aback

and

thought 'gosh

- he is human'. I know it

sounds absolutely preposterous".

can imply 'general refuse' (only fit for the mulberry waste bin?) or 'an internal organ' (something which is indispensable). Given that Prof Levy puts more effort into concocting these weekly news bulletins than most medical students

put into their extemal SSC's, we can

safely assume he would rather it be interpreted as the latter. But how did giblet come to pass? Back n 1994/95

intemet and email were fresh and novel

-->-----+:-:Ui:-;-?;,.;=^:** The notion that consultants too do, in fact, suck on

boiled sweets - or at least carry them in their pockets was a revelation to Dr. Levy. Being a rather timid, less than confident young man, in a time when Consultants roamed the wards like ahnighty beings, swarmed by heavenly young

technological advances that Levy wanted to ensure were used to their maximum potential. He wanted access to personal email accounts for all medical students. But there was no point in having an email account if nobody was going to contact you. "It would be like being on Facebook with no friends". So, in an effort to ensure everyone had reason to check their accounts, and to make all students feel a liule bit loved, Andy decided to email them all individually - every week. And that was the birth of giblet.

female medics, Andy Levy found himself a bit out

of place.

Finally, having decided endocrinology was the only rotation he had enjoyed, mainly due to working with an admirable consultant with whom he got on well, he was put in touch with one Professor Lighnnan. Perhaps seeing something of themselves in each other, Levy and Lighnnan hit it off and Prof Lightnan took him under his wing

and gave him a research training post. Now married with trvo babies under 18 months and living in a "wedge shaped one bed roomed aparftnent" in London on a single person's research grant (having neglected to inform the granting commission that he had a wife and two babies to support!) - life in London wasnt particularly easy. He went on to spend 14 months in NIH (The National Institute of Health) Maryland, USA as part of his research, and when Lightman upped and moved to Bristol, he brought his whole departrnent with him - including Prof Levy. That was back in 1993. And that was Andy kvy's debut in Bristol. It was also the birth of giblet.

"lt would be like being on Faceboak with no friends" IVe always wondered why he called it'Giblet'. So I took it upon myself to research the word itself. 'Giblet' - as defined by the on-line version of the Oxford English Dictionary, is 'garbage or entrails'. Whichever meaning you chose to place upon it - it

Is he

offended

some

of the "very rude

feedback" he has received?

"No, I love it. I think it's great. That means that there is somebody there. That means they are at least opening the email and not just deleting it. On some occasions you get emails which do take the wind out of your sails - with plenty of expletives. Occasionally you get emails that are like "wow" and I always mail them back". Prof Levy is not a man who seeks gratitude. He seems to revel on reactions - good or bad. Although through the years he has admittedly softened and has begun to care a little more about whether he is liked by his students or not, that is not his motivation. He appears to be motivated by enthusiasm, vibrancy, philosophy, and ingenuity. He is an endless wealth of knowledge and energy

which he directs into incessant leaming

and research. He leamed how to make amazingly real

'fake skin' from the puppet makers for 'Spitting Image', he is an honouree research fellow at UWE with the Head of Robotics Systems and he has identified the genetic sequence of rainbow trout! "Did you know that fish are tetraploids? They have four sets of chromosomes?". No. No I wasnt aware of that. More to the point, I wasnt aware that I wasn't aware of that. That's the magic of Andy Levy, he can tell you things you never ever wanted to know but with such vigour that he makes it seem interesting. Maybe giblet loses its 'Levy Factor' once it's written down in black and white. Personally, I don't claim to be overtly enthused by my weekly fix of 'what's new in Nature this week'. But I do know the time and effort that goes into that email. It is for that reason that I always scan through it. Before I delete it!

Prof Levy is a man who never stops questioning. Most strikingly of all, he never stops questioning himself. Is he a good teacher? Only after being awarded three prizes at graduation day in recognition of his skills and countless mentions in the year book can he begin to think that actually, he might not be all that bad. Whatever about him, egotism is not one of his virtues. So next time you open your email account and see an unopened giblet. Before you delete and expunge, just hit the reply button and say 'Hey Andy, thanks for the email'. It costs nothing, but it means a lot. And if nothing else, at least you're clogging up his inbox!

....his DIY skills surpass those of MacGyver and the A Team, put together

Favourite drink; malt whiskey Favourite meal; fishpie

So what motivates Prof Levy? Well over the years he has seen many medical shrdents fail and has wanted to make the exams "better and better and more reflective of what the students are expected to know. We still can't say that this exam is passing the people who will be good doctors and failing the ones who won't". One year they failed 17 students. So he embarked on a quest to inform and educate students on what they should know. "It's just common sense - you want everybody to pass, you've all got into medicine". So what would be the icing on the cake for Prof Levy? He celebrated his 50th birthday this year, he is married with three children, he has had three books published, his DIY skills surpass those of MacGyver and the A Team, put together. He pauses to think. "What I'd really like is not to have to worry about funding for my research. We are just coming to the end of an 18 month grant and I was supposed to hear last week if this would be continued. I'd like to be able to continue with the research and put money into the fund so we didn't have to worry. I just love what I do. It's great. ['m mostly miserable, and I'm waiting for a grant to come through at the moment and I'll either be so happy or so miserable for the next 8 months, based on this grant application. But look, I've never been interviewed before, I'm coming up to 50 this year, still different things are happening. I've got lots of mentions in the year book. And it's so wonderfrrl and it's never happened before".

Things you always wanted to know about Andy Levy, bet were afraid to ask...

Favourtie film: oThe English Patient'

and

oAmadeus'

Favourite TV Show: oGreenwing'

Favourite music artist: Sir Michael Kemp Tippett, (English composers) and The Scissor Sisters

Boxers or briefs? - Briefs. Boxers would ride up, wouldn't they?? (Sorry, you're asking the wrong person, can't say that I wear either!)

What comes into his head when he thinks of: Thy.roid - ooGraves disease" Academic medicine - ooTroubleo'

Bristol med school - oothe best" Clifton -.Rowdy and subsiding" Relaxing - (pause)...',,lj"r. keep thinking sex ll Giblet - ooChicken soupo' NHS - ooThe best. Amazing"

If Andy Leuy could have a dinner parly with 3 people of his choice, alive or dead, who would they be? O Jacob Bronowski (English-Polish mathematiciano presenter of the BBC television documentary series, The Ascent of Man,) O Jonathon Miller (British neurologist, theatre and opera directoro television presenter, humourist and sculptor.) O Bill Bryson

Black Bag's Guide Jo walking aids By Rosie Glitterzone Hello ogoin reoders, it's been o while.

Does onyone else get confused with the number of wolking oids ovoiloble these doys? There ore just so mony, it con be hord to know whot to recommend to eldedy folk, let olone tell them which hond they should hold it in for o bod knee or o bod hip. The off side? The good side? Who knows, ond quite fronkly who cores? Not me. Whot I wont to know is whot cre the importont things to consider when recommending whot is every coffin dodgers most high profile

occessory - the wolking oid. We osked some reol life. users whot they thought of their choices.

ilargarets musings: "As you can see I suffer from a bit of bad posture. Ever since I took part in Clicendales I have found I

can't help but stick

butt out. After a

few

months my back was really getting sore and painkillers and physio didn't help. I found that the best thing was two sticks. I chose these for

their realistic wood it matches my

colouring. People say

eyes." Learning point: Match eye colour to stick where possible.

Ethel's Story:

"l too choose

the double option. I have a nasty problem with my metatarsal joints which forces me to these wear

orthopaedic

precarious, they load the weight-bearing part of the joints far better. The downside however is that l'm a bit unsteady so I need sticks. I chose these two because

according

to Trinny and

Susanna,

angular handles go best with angular jaws. But I also have curved armpits so went for the orange curvy one to go with them."

Learning Point: By using two sticks you can have twice the fashion appeal and increased stability.

Dorothy's diamonds:

have massive norks so have a tendency to fall forwards.

But I won't let this hold me back. Fuck that, I've got to get on with life. Mobility is important to me so I chose a frame. lfs got wheels on it to make things easier. The main problem is the wheels make a squeaking noise when I'm getting dutty on the dance floor." Learning point: Whilst faster, wheeled frames may need oil to maintain their bearings. A Hainb manual is available for most models made since 1993.

lry'g insights:

"l've been suffering with RA for many years now. The bilateral symmetrical deforming polyarthropathy really gets me down sometimes. Lately I've struggled even with the activities of daily living and can hardly get dressed in the morning so have to spend most of the day like this. I need my stick not just to help me get to the toilet in time but also as a tool. I use the straight handle of this one to get my stockings up to my knees when I can reach them."

shoes.

Though

Learning point: Some walking aids have a

Learning point: Sticks can be gadgets too

which makes them cooler.

Jsgus's Gems:

"l don't really need a stick as I'm awesome and can walk on water. Amazing huh! I rock. No, I rule. Huh, bridge. got as a one this Anyway. I gift from some farmer dude. I got some other shit too, gold and stuff, but thafs naff. lt's all about diamonds now. Mmm, lce baby. Holler at me! Hear the children sing, ahhhhh! Sorry where was l, Yeah, so this dude gave it to me when I was a baby. He said I'd grow into it but he knew nuttin'. Look

take it to the

at the fucking size of it. Ow! Hear me now. Anyway, I hear sticks are in this season and I like to keeP uP with

fashion."

dual action and work as seating aids! Double the fun, and a bargain.

The wisdom of Ollve:

"l run marathons and triathalons so need a

really lightweight stick. I chose a

titanium one with a TeflonrM coating so the water runs off nice and easy. lfs also double handed so I can be ambidextrous with it. The grips are special sports grade neoprene so I can use it swimming too. lts quite expensive, but ifs ok because I'm a mature student so the NHS bursary I get pays for it. 3p a mile."

Learning point: Just because you swim doesn't mean you have to do without a stick. Black Tom's top tips:

"l'm a MarvelrM comic character so need an accessory. My stick is short, but in a Freudian waY

this shows I have

no concerns about how manlY

Learing point: Jesus is weird. And a lamb thief by the looks of things. Keep away kids.

I am. Unlike some others could mention."

Pen's points:

aren't iust for biffs. SuPer'

"Being rejected after my Clicendales audition for having too much muffin top, I became very depressed.

I tried everything, even tar. I got so exhausted too. I needed sticks to ,get about on. After a ,while my hair-.fell out. This is just 1d wig. Trouble is, it keeps

stipping off. When I try and put it back on I have to let go of the sticks so lfall over. This little run-around gives me both mobility and a place to sit while I put my wig back on."

Learning point:

Sticks

heroes have them too.

So, I hope that's going to get you through your COMP2 exams, more importantly, be really useful when you are an F1. What great advice from real* people. This phenomenological approach to research really cuts through the figures and charts and gives you what you need to know. We thank the participants for giving up their time to talk to us at the education wing of Black bag. Next issue we'll be talking more about sticks. Pimp sticks, the best way to support your friendly Trendelenburg affected Gansta. Get with the wicked. Word to your mother. Rosie xxx *Obviously Jesus is just a character in a book

The Whole NHS Runs On Sexual Tension

Liqht is shed, nay housed, onto the i-nner workinqs of our health system. A doctor sPills the saucy beans.

Chirpy cardiologtist Dr. Chris "yes it is my real name" Custard, known affectionatelY as Sweaty Custard, is the source. He gives us the low-down on what's up and vents about sex favouritism regardinq honours for students.

Yes, The Murmur Magician himsel-f te1ls us, "If you want to get anything done round here - say a scan - you grab the Prettiest Fl in your team and send her down to the bl-okes in the radiologY department. You know - to sweeten the deal, because reallY the whole of the NHS runs on sexual tension. " Worry not; he does go

down

himself occasionally too. He gives us another tiP, "If You happen to know that one of them is into cricket, just start chattinq about the test. In no time you'llbe 'mates' and You can get your Patient scanned double quick. "

that he afone a notoriouslY hard-to-work-with stickler of an ul-tra sounder. "She was a dragon. This big, scary, AfroCaribbean lady. " She aPParentlY revelled in denying busY doctors any leeway. Chris does an impression of her, for some reason in his own voice, " tWhen did you say you wanted this scan done? Did you saY todaY? TODAY!? Ha ha hat"' Chris easily swayed her round with his never failing self deprecating introduction of himself, his somewhat sillY name' and a handy bribe of fruit and

He enlightens us managed to charm

A chip on his shoulder seems to appear when he gets on the subject of honours. "OnIy girls qet them! And theY were aII pretty gir1s. . .WelI it's much

easier for them. The academics at the top doing the interviews are all men of a certain tYPe who see these girls and chat to them a bit and think 'you're nice here you go, have honours. The girls sail throuqh,.'" Questioningr Docteur Crdme Anglais (for all you Erasmabangs out there) on this scandaf he was unleashing, he did then admit that one boy in his Year did get honours. This gtuy, it seems, You could not have !e! given him honours. He sounds l-ike hot-

stuff (in terms of intel-Iigence, but who knows). He answered all the questions put to him perfectly then went on to turn the tabl-es by interrogating them on what they knew.

But it is swings and roundabouts it seems. Chris says when You're a student or doctor in hosPital a bit of changeroo occurs. "Girls come a cropper with the nurses usua1ly. They are i-n their turf being rivals. It's the sexual thing all over again. Loads of my friends encountered bitchiness. " The nurses are darlings to the men beginning their training in Dr Custard's experience. "They come over to you when you're knackered with a nice cup of tea, ruff Your hair a bit - 'You alright?' Yeah. 'Oh bY the way, I've done all those bl-oods for you'"

nut.

Troumo Conference 2OO7 Uniwr.sity

Bristol Delegofes: Jo Rees, Becky

Amos,

Angelo Lim, Amondo Jetley, Hugh 5ims Willioms

The 6th Troumo Conference for

medicol

students wqs held ot St. Borts in London. We were whisked off to Southwork Fire Stotion

to troin with London's A volunteer medicol ?esctp services. frontline student wos cut out of o (pre-crushed!) vehicle before being sofely evocuoted by the poromedic crew. This took 35 minutes from Troinirg Centre

stort to f inish ond wos o highly

visuol

introduction to the chollenge of rescuing people

fropped by their vehicles (from o sofe distonce). After o teo-breok in the conteen to dry off (I sweor Cotherine Tote wos on the tilll), we were then reolly put to the test. We were split into five mon teoms and recovered 'volunteers' from every conceivoble position o

vehicle con

get itself into. The most

chollenging wos on upside down cor (trying to hold o C-spine ond give 'inverted' instructions wos o lot horder thon it looked) ond trying to relrieve o potient from on HGV collision (Very high, very heovy!).

monneguins (which

porticulorly bod ot ond definitely ne-ed a lot more proctice!). Doy two storted bright ond eorly with o hike olong the Mile End Rood for on [A] oirwoy, [B] breothing ond [C] circulotion lecture series. In the ofternoon we transferred to Mile End Bornocks for on insight into fhe world of Army medicine. We hod o lecture on fhe chollerges of setting up o field hospitol in the frogi de-sert ond fhe horrors of civilions cosuolties

cought

wos

up in the

conf

lict(s).

Chemicol,

biologicol, rodiologicol ond nucleor emergency troining followed, which involved settirg up o decontominotion oreo ond sofely removing fhe contominoted Noddy suit from the volunteer medicol student. A moss de-comp to the bor wos wormly welcomed, before returning to bose to prepore f or the grond night out ot the West End ot Sugor Reef. Medicol students, HEtUts doctors ond seemingly holf of the London Fire Brigode come olong for the porfy. Tickets to Tiger Tiger nightclub oppeared from the elher (or moybe it wos the ethonol!). Respect to the sociol orgonisers, os the evenitp wos on omozing success!!

Doy three, early blurry stort! The

150

delegoles hod been split into threegroups. 20 lucky people hod the exceptionolly rore chonce to go to the London Underground Emergency Response Unit troining centre in Acton (Well done Hr4h!),however the poybock wos o 7.30om stort ofter the excesses of the night before. The rest of us hod the privilege of visiting the HEMS helipod, which T for one will remember for a very long time. After getting over the initiol feor of being very high ond very exposed in o foir old wind, the stunning views ocross London mode it worthwhile. However, the most owe inspiring of oll wos listenirg to the HEMS doctor exploin the reolities of their work. Simply trying fo lift the two bockpocks thot the doctors hove to corry ond run reosonoble distonces with wos very humbling could

AfIer lunch we orrived of the University of London cornpus for on ofternoon of procticol skills. Stoiions included insertion of o chest droin into o sheep rib cqe, ne-edle ond surgicol cricothyroidotomy on o turkey lorynx, which wos eosier than onticipcted (oh fhe luxury of o non-criticol situotion!), centrol line insertion on

borely lift them off the groundl). Doctors ore otioched to the HE,t S helicopter for 6 months only, due to the stress levels of the job. The helicopter is colled out on overage four times o doy ond generally works within the M?5 boundory, but it con be colled further o field in exlreme situotions. Every time the helicopter is colled out, the pilot hos to find somewhere close to lond - which in London con be guite a 13

challenge. Although, there seemed to be some

fovourite ploces (The corners

of big nome

footboll pitches especiolly!).

Overoll I wos amazed by the dedication ond professionolism of these medics to function under such extrerne pressure. Afler lunch there wos o neurotroumo and careers in traumo lectures. The course is non-profit moking ond costs â&#x201A;Ź50 for three doys - borgoin! The sociol wos â&#x201A;Ź15 ond if required qccommodotion with breokfost was 832 o night. there was o reolly voried mix of medicol students ronging from lst to 5th yeors ond it wos really nice to meel people from other medicol schools ond compore notesl I went hoping to ease the tronsition from second to third year, os well os goin insight into troumo medicine. I reolly goined o lot from going ond cannot recommend

highly enough.

For more informotion obout Emergency Medicine Conferencesz htfi / lvntw. troumomedicine.org/ (Borts & z

Royol London) The doctors exploined how drug syringes ore drown up doily in odvonce, for odult ond

poediotric doses os the stress of the situotion mokes dose colculotions highly susceptible to errot. The average f light time is obout f ive minutes ond this is used toprepare the likely drugs needed for thot porticulor situotion. We spent over on hour on the helipod, beforebeing given a lecture on the work of HEMS - with o few gory pictures thrown in for hommering home the pointl I will never look ot tube plotforms in guite the some woy ogoin!

Irrperiol

College olso run o Troumo Medicine

Conf erence

for students

www. fondonsoirombulonce. org (HE^ S

website)http t / /wtttn .]roumo. otg (Loryest Internet Troumo Core Site)

"The doctor sserns tg have less lime for us these rlays!"

Guide to Post-Elective Dinner Party Etiquette Once you come back from your elective will inevitably end up going to social events where the entire conversation revolves around a series of endless anecdotes from sun-tanned medics. If you spent your time in Clifton rather than Cambodia there is still hope of joining in the conversation with the help of this small guide:

If you get any time to prepare make sure that you come appropriately dressed. Sandals are a must, apply lots of fake tan and if possible don't shave or wash for a couple of days beforehand to give you that 'I've just come back from saving the world' look. Adom both arms and legs with beads and bracelets. If asked about them give an appropriate story of their origin i.e. "Oh this bracelet? Yeah that was given to me by a patient after I removed his appendix with my teeth. No scalpels/antibiotics/gloves/toilet paper out in the Solomon islands you know... " Firstly it is important to make your elective out to be set in the most deprived/undeveloped/war tom place imaginable. Lie in the confidence that you can be sure that everyone else at the table is doing the same. Claim to be working in the most deprived hospital imaginable, where your presence is likely to save countless lives. It doesn't matter that you only went in twice and spent the rest of the time doing a dive master course.

It's also important to tell everyone that you went for the whole two months in one place. If anyone lese goes to any country for a shorter period of time, go immediately on the offensive and mercilessly pour scorn on them for not having fully experienced the country's culture. Claim to have spent as little money as possible, you wanted to fully experience living as a native. Laugh at anyone that spent any money at all doing anything. Tell them that they must have been doing the "tourist route" or else were ripped off because of their lack of travelling experience. Remark about how amazing it was that you bumped into Rupert and Fiona in Rajasthan of all places! Also Jonas, Albert, Percy, Tim, Toby, Helen, and Jemmima what an artazing coincidence to meet so many people from Bristol! Make sure to snub any tourist hotspots especially wonders of the world such as the Taj Mahal, Great wall of China, Ayers rock ect... claiming that this is what the tourists do and its not really getting close to the people of the country at alI. Remind everyone that in order to not be supporting the unethical exploitation that goes on in these places you should be 5 miles away just to be on the safe side.

No dinner part is complete without a series of fabricated elective tales. It is important to have a good one as everyone at the table will have at least 10. Ideally every story should include the 4 main ingredients of a medical student elective anecdote 1.) Danger 2.) Heroics 3.) Disgust 4.) Mocking the locals. Sample story: "A lion went straight for us but luckily I managed to impale it with the pointy end of my tendon hammer, I then fashioned its intestines into condoms to stop the local population dying out from HIV. Went back three weeks later and they still haven't worked out how to put them on! Silly Africans!"

Finally

you didn't go anywhere for your elective and don't have the imagination to make

something up, don't despair! Claim that the whole idea of an elective is unethical and exploitive to the host countries. You can then sit back and feel smug.

Ewrybody's goirg surfirg.... Surf trip wos the week before guysl

There's sonethirE kinda disfitrbitE about a g,t/ wifh a six o'clock shadow and a dunny in his moufh...

Woopsiell Not-so 'Rock SteodY Eddie'

OK 6uys - we need fo gef our hands on a REAL woman,.

Ladies in Red - congratalafitg fhemselues on a iob well done. This was obviously early on in fhe night,

SKIP BR'STOL_ MAKING A DIFFERENCE appliedfor medicine, how mony of youwqnted to save the world? Alongwith the "I'm a bit interested in Science", the "I've been onX, Y qnd Z committees/teqms since I was 2" and the "I'm q hard-working team ployer" phrases, how many of you put "I want to So whenyou

make a Because

dffirence"

if you did, here's how you do it.

SKIP (Students for Kids International Projects) South Africa is a project

set up

run

and

Bristol medical

students. It is part of the national charity SKIP and is affiliated with Medsin. The ethos of the charity is to

provide love, care and attention for underprivileged children worldwide. This summer 34 Bristol Volunteers travelled to South Africa to work (and have frr") i" Cato Manor, a township on the outskirts of Durban. The HIV prevalence in this area is one in three. Only 17"/o of those who need freatment get antirefrovirals. In one school we worked tn, 90"A of the children had just one parent.

Throughout the year SKIP Bristol hold many fundraising events last year's

included pub crawls,

bag-packs, collections, "South Africa Night" and the

fabulous "Jazz on the Waterfronf'. We raised f7000 last year - and we want to top it this yearl

Out in South Africa, we worked with the whole community in Cato Manor - from

Preschool teaching to founding a Women's group, from a youth club with STI lectures to a feeding programme for the most disadvantaged children. We worked in four different schools a combination of playing silly games with the littlies, and teaching sex education, HIV awareness, TB information and gender equality to the primary school children.

After the project, we headed back to our hostel for much needed rest, and even more needed beer! The local braii's (barbeques) are alone worth going to South Africa for!

It was long

days, hard work, and the best time of my life! This project was the most rewarding thing I have ever done. In the preschools, a lot of the children have never known kindness, and only a few of them even knew how to play. One particular example is a little girl who did not engage, and had not even smiled for the whole month we were there. On my last day on project, we made her laugh, and the feeling was amazing!

This is a developing

project

our

volunteers

advance

improve

it.

shape, and

So why

should you

get involved? Because of want to help people". Because it be the most rewarding thing you ever do. Because we need you. Because you WILL make a difference.

will

Visit@formore information or email s kipbristol@ hotm ail.co.uk

MTOSS 2AO7 MTOSS Application Form 2007

Question 1: List your educational achievements. (5 points - 254 words) Paper Published: Reference - Amedi C., Galenica L, Bristol D H B et A1. How to win your way to the MTAS Foundation Programme Training Job you want! Bristol Publishing Company. 2AA7 .

Question 2: Give one example of a non-academic achievement explaining both the significance to you and the relevance to foundation training. (8 points - 150 words)

During my undergraduate training I have regularly been a performer in the famous 'C1,lCendales' medics dance show, later choreographing parts of the show with a colleague. It is significant to me that I was chosen to be a part of the show arrd given the role of deciding how ten young medical students should take their clothes off. Taking my own clothes off in lront of over a thousand people is a thrilling experience. I learnt about the many great things that you can get by exposing yourself and the crowd always go wild. On reflection, rehearsing the dance, choosing easy to remove clothing arrd wearing matching underwear taught me the value of good preparation. In my foundation trai.ning I will use the tool of taking off my clothes to get what I want and hope to use it to my advantage in getting the rest of the multidisciplinary team to do my work for me.

Question 3: Describe one example {not necessarily clinical) relevant to your

medieal training where you have felt personally under pressure and challenged. What did you do to manage this and what did you learn from this experience that will be relevant to your foundation training? (8 points 150 words)

During sports initiations 1 felt under pressure to drink as much alcohol as possible. The enormous challenge of litres of alcohol cal1ed for an evening action plan where I prioritised beer and cider of most urgency first, then wine, and lastly spirits and shooters. In this plal it was essential to make room for tactical vomiting, a task that would potentially be carried out several times. The evening was a success, I made it to 9.30 before being sent to hospital to have my stomach pumped. On reflection, I was not prepared fully enough for the challenge and next year I will train for such an event. During my foundation training I will be aware of the need to be ready for any challenge that may arise and will be in good drinking fitness for my first payday party.

Question 4: Describe one example from your undergraduate medical training of your ability to prioritise tasks and information from any clinical or education area. What was the outcome, what have you learned and how will you apply this to foundation training? (8 points - 150 words)

purchased an Xbox 360. I learned the value of prioritising tasks and had to make a 6 month strategr plan in order that my university studies did not alfect my Xbox 360 playing. I prioritised improving my Pro-Evo team, the most urgent of all tasks first, followed by attempting to place myself high in the world online rankings in Project Gotham Racing 3. I felt it important to still give myself adequate time to relax and drink beer, in between flicking through a couple of pages of the oxford clinical handbook every seventh day.

During my fourth year my housemates and

The outcome was a strong Chelsea team, easily capable of beating my housemates rubbish AC Milan side, regardless of Adriano's skills, and moved myself to within a reasonable distance of my other housemate's very impressive PGR3 lap times.

I learned that hard work, commitment and good time management can make any challenge less of a mountain to climb. In my foundation training I will always be prepared to attend ward-rounds and teaching sessions between my Xbox 360 playing and realise the value of time management in achieving this aim

Question 5: Describe one example from your own clinical experience that has increased your understanding of the importance of team working. What was your role and contribution to the team? What have you learned and how will you apply this to foundation training? (8 points - 150 words) During my elective some years ago in Iraq, I was acting as a medic on the front line treating troops who had newly returned from battle. Whilst operating to save one soldiers left eye, triaging four new patients and performing CPR on two men who had severe gunshot wounds, I brought down two Iraqi fighter jets that were above us by firing rounds from my AK-47, not the most ideal antiaircraft weapon I might add.

In this position I had no team. I learnt the importance of always working alone. I pily the fool who works in a team. In my foundation training I intend fulfil all of the roles of the multidisciplinary team, myself.

Question 6: Describe one example of a recent clinical situation here you demonstrated appropriate professional behaviour. What did you do and what have you learned? How will you apply this to foundation training? {8 points - 150 words) I was present in sexual health clinic at the Milne Centre in Bristol when a fellow medical student was attending as a patient for his own medical needs. It was essential that I maintained patient confidentia-lily, especially with such a sensitive subject. It would have been very unfair to Hugh for everyone to be discussing the Galenicals Presidenls' $exually transmitted diseases in central teaching later that day. However, through my appreciation of the GMC guidelines and awareness of the rules on confidentiality, I have not disclosed anything about the situation. I also learned the importance of being professioaal in clinics where discussions are on subjects of a delicate and personal nature.

In my foundation training I shall always uphold patient confidentiality and am very conscious that it is easy to stip up and allow a patient's private details to go beyoad the grouads of tbe hospital clinic room, but have not and will never let this happen.

Tfrat's enoryfr fiilr'oss - efs BlackBag BlackBagBlackBagBlackBag BlackBagBlackBag BlackBag BlackBag FEEDBACK COUPON - please feel free to tell us what you think of this edition. Simply cut out the form below and stick it up your arses, "We can't wait to hear from you"

Time

for a oarsdism shift?

Thomas Kuhn is a philosopher I have been dwelling on a great deal for the last few weoks, not least because we have been studying epidemiology and biostatistics here at the U of B. Kuhn, who died in T996, is said to be "one of most influential philosophers of science of the twentieth century" (Stanford Encyclopaedia of Philosophy, 2007). Kuhn's philosophies of science brought about new ways of thinking about the way we construct scientific

knowledge;

his work grew from

the Conventionalist movement, which sought to undermine the prevailing positivist approach of the West. In particular, Kuhn identified the concept of the 'paradigm'; a description of the prevailing approach to knowledge construction, and all the associated features of scientific method and thought that accompany it. (Smith, 2003). The progression of this theory of paradigm was that science, as we know it, is merely a stable point in a long history of paradigms and paradigm shifts. Kuhn argued that a cycle lay behind the seeming progression of scientific thought. A paradig:n of scielce is born, it works for a while, and thea anomalies arise. The paradigm continues uatil the anomalies become impossible to put aside, and a'crisis' is upon us. Out of the crisis rises a 'scientific revolution', and a new paradigm takes the place of the old,

beginning the cycle again (Smith, 2003). An example of this phenomenon is the concept of the shape of the earth. Once, we knew that the earth was flat and the stars and sun orbited around us. Then we knew that the earth was a sphere. Today, we know that the earth is a sphere orbiting the sun, but, according to Kuhn, this is merely the paradigm we inhabit today. Next week we may know that the earth is a cube made of chocolate, although I acknowledge that we probably aren't that lucky. So where does all this fit in with epidemiology

and biostatistics? Well, biostatistics and

epidemiolory are very'closed system'in the way that they are taught to medical students, and it could be argued that even the qualitative methods we are taught are relatively empiricist in their approach. An example of this would be the paper by Donovan and Blake (2000), which uses grounded theory (an ethnomethodological

techaique developed by Anselm Strauss, 1987 (Yales, 2005). It has been argued that grounded

iheory is an attempt to

emPiricise ethnomethodology; I would argue that grounded theory is empirical enough to fit into the broadly empi:icist/positivist church of 2Ist century medicine. My point overall, is that despite attempts to show us the 'art' of medicine, perhaps the paradigm chosen for the science of medicine completely overshadows these attempts. A human being is unique; he or she may share characteristics with those around them. If they are twins they may be identical, but the only real assumption one can make about an individual is that their truth, their 'verschtadt', is different to yours, and ever other humans that is or ever has

been. Epidemiology and biostatistics

use

statistical closure to attempt to find simplicity in a world made up of complex actors. They make the baseline assumption that all human beings, excluding a certain number of intrinsic properties, are the same. This is where I feel that failing IS medicine Yes, epidemiology acknowledges its failings, and yes, these days most good scientists will attempt to declare their values when performing research, but ultimately, the problem is in the paradigm. How caa you treat aa individual successfully, when you fail to acknowledge their individuality? Our problem extends into our quantitative research (where the patient, rather

than the drug fails), our qualitative research (where we, the doctor defiae the measures of quality of a life we are not living), and hence into our practice as doctors. Five years ago, I never would have said this, but I honestly believe that the holistic medical practitioners have got the right idea. Instead of endlessly trying to close the system, categorise, operationalise, shut in, box in, protocol, they attempt to draw out the essence of a person's illness and find out not only what is organically wrong, but where that illness fits into the narrative of a person's existence. Holistic medicine, then, is true participant observation ethnomethodology, and as such cannot be quantified by a randomised control trial as each

unique. rs event So, to return to Thomas Kuhn, what would he say about all this? Well, perhaps the paradigm will hold a little longer. After all, although we don't save everyone with modern medicine, certainly many people survive. Eventually, though, this approach may go into crisis... And then? Time for aparadigm shift, methinks.

SdtrI

6lnc$

Phrase to use this term:

Cehstia[ troresigfrts for tfic trortficowirrg lFeat

trornigfits:

'l am Andy Northey. I am

lron'

tuies (Mar 21 - Apr 20) I think you can still dress

down

a bit.

Please

remember you are still a student, no one looks up

to you. So relax a little. Caplicom (Dec 22

Jan 20) Hmmmm. You seem

Why waste time ironing,

to have fallen on hard times recently don't you?

creases never passed on infections. Loosen that

Your difficulty concentrating and the dark circles

tie, you need as much blood to your brain

under your eyes have mainly been caused by a

possible with all the study you're doing. Disregard

meteor shower just the far side of Venus. But don't

that 'no midrift' rule. I don't see any grey heads

worry, things are looking up. You may not be aware

shaking when you flash your abs. They love it.

of it yet, but your flatmate has a surprise in store for

Your lucky Tool: Neurotips

you. Be nice to them and I'm sure they'll give it to

Test you should use soon: Percussing a fluid thrill

you sooner.

Phrase

Your lucky Tool: The adjustable spanner

please'

to use this term: 'three sugars in that

Test you should use soon: Schilling's. Phrase to use this term: 'is it because I'm fat?'

Taurus (Apr

21-

May

20) I can't

believe you made

all that up on your F1 form. You know who you are.

Aqmdus (Jan21- Feb 19) No news is good news

Outrageous.

you keep telling yourself. But I'm afraid you're

Your lucky Tool: Your conscience

wrong. You really should have heard about "that

Test you should use soon: A lie detector

thing" by now. I think its time to pursue the answer

Phrase to use this term: 'Bad luck. The allocations

yourself rather than just waiting around for it. Seek,

do seem a bit random this year don't they'

and you willfind.

Your lucky Tool: Your own

Gemini (May 21

Test you should use soon: Pemberton's

Jun 21) Teamwork

Phrase to use this term: 'Did you see that great

teamwork

piece in Giblet this week?'

teamwork. Three words you should learn the meaning

Pisces (Feb 20

Mar 20) The winds of El Niffo are

still behind you! Fantastic luck indeed. ln

fact

of. ls it so hard to help other people? Was your bag

people all over the world are less lucky than you

too full to pick up handouts for those who missed

which is amazing really. That's about 5.5 billion people worse off than you are. God you're good!

the lecture? Would it have hurt you to mention there

was a patient with great signs last week on AAU?

lncredible. Tell someone today you really are great.

Could you not turn down your music a tiny bit so the

Congratulations.

others could concentrate on their work? Lets try

Your lucky Tool: Allen Keys

harder this term shall we?

Test you should use soon: Exercise tolerance

Your lucky Tool: a 123hz tuning fork. 23

Test you should use soon: Litmus

bright sun on the docks and you'll see what a great

Phrase to use this term: 'l'd love to'

city you're missing out on indoors.

Your lucky Tool: The HB Pencil

Ganer (Jun 22

Jul 22) As the rays of the sun

Test you should use soon: The one where you

shine down on the earth, so should you shine to

throw pasta on the wall and see if it sticks

others. But shine with the healthy vibrance of

Phrase to use this term: 'Anyone fancy a walk?'

balanced diet! You really have to sort yourself out in Oct 23) All your stars seem to have

the food department. Five a day you're supposed to

Libna (Sept 23

get, have you had that this week yet? lf you don't

been sucked into a black hole. Sorry. Seems to be

sort it out soon, you'll have horrible illnesses for the

a bit of a recurring theme this doesn't it. I'm sure it's

rest of your life and only yourself to blame.

not your fault really.

Your lucky Tool: Shopping trolley

Scorpio (Oct 24

Test you should use soon: The Selotape test

more honest with people. You have so many valid

Phrase to use this term: 'Do you want a bit of my

opinions and views, you just need to share them.

orange?'

That girl in your year who's face colour doesn't

Nov 22) I think you need to be

match her neck and arms, that Bloke with the

- Aug 23) You still reek. Have you

birthday in August who reeks, the girl who snorts

learned nothing? You really should start thinking

when she laughs, and the old guy who sits at the

about your own health and hygiene. lts all very well

front and picks at his bald spot. How are they going

wanting to care for others but unless you get your

to realise and improve on their flaws unless you tell

halitosis under control and at the very least wash

them? You'llbe helping really.

your bits and pits weekly you'll just be passing on

Your lucky Tool: A colander

your filth to the venerable and doing more harm

Test you should use soon: Those cards for the

than good.

colour blind kids. Some funny Japanese name.

Your lucky Tool: Cillit Bang, you're beyond soap.

Phrase to use this term: 'Can I have a quiet word'

Leo (Jul 23

Test you should use soon: Your own sense of smell Phrase to use this term: 'Has someone let one go?'

Sagittarius (Nov 23

Dec 21)You atways have had

something electric about you, but this term its not a

Mrgo (Aug 24

Sept

22) The days

are

recently resulting in some unusual power surges in

gefting longer, and this provides you

your area. Please wear rubber shoes for the next few weeks at least. (You may be able to nick a pair

with

the

form theatre 2) Keep away from fluorescent lights,

opportunities you've

overhead power cables and mobile phones. lf you

been wanting. You know you've been

have to use batteries for anything, use none larger

a while about doing more

thinking for

with your day, well now's your chance. Turn off the telly, get outside and make the most of it. Breathe in the fresh air, look at the sparkling reflection of the

good thing. The lay lines under Bristol have shifted

than AAA Your lucky Tool: Candles Test you should use soon: Saccharin

Phrase to .use this term: 'Jelly shoes are in fashion actually' May the stars look kindly upon us all. Till next time, Sally

SPORTS NEWS! Sopfiia'4ntoniou

Mark and I began our year as Club Captains with the summer term Sports Club Dinner in

lt was an appropriate night of with SCD traditions, with keeping madness spectacular team fancy dress, food launching, duelling and chorus singing. Mackenzies.

This term the teams have been joined by new faces and started their matches. On the weekend of October 27th our first btock fixture took place in Birmingham where lots of sporting and social activity took place. Team Updates Men's Rugby Caotains - Eoin and Damien

It is an exciting new year for Men's' Rugby. They have already had a record number of matches this term. The squad is training at Coombe Dingle with university coaches, and recently joined the Evening Post Merit League. They have started in style with 3 wins; the latest 48-13. The loyalty of players of old combined with fresh new talent and strong successful captaincy predicts season for the club.

Woman's Rugby Captain - Rachel The year has started with excitement for Women's' Rugby. A large influx of freshers and return of old faces has resulted in the largest squad in years. A full 15- a-side, full of promise, played against Birmingham away, and following a narrow loss they are looking fonruard to the re-match at home in a couple of weeks. The girls both play and party in style and are looking forward to a successful year.

Netball Captains - Chess. Katie and Sarah. Our captains are already leading one of Galenicals most successful teams into another fantastic season. The large number of quality players has resulted in the formation of strong 1st and 2nd teams. Both teams are regularly competing at high levels following entry to a local league. The term has started fantastically by winning the intramural tournament, a series of wins in league 25

matches and beating Warwick in the first NAMS match 46-6. Last year Netball had their most successful NAMS final beating the big names of Manchester, Nottingham and GKT and also winning the tournament of the south. This year is starting well and we hope to at least equal if not exceed last yea/s successes.

Men's Football Captain - John The success and strength of Galenicals Men's' Football is evident as they reached the NAMS semi-finals last season. The term started with a close loss to a strong Birmingham side but the team is looking forward to beating them on home ground. The team of new and old faces led by their passionate captain is sure to have a successful season.

Women's Football Captain - Tess These sexy footie girls have lost some strong players to the world of work - however new faces are re-building the team. \/Vlrilst still to grace the pitch this term it will not be long before they are back. A team full of fun, life and energy in matches and on the dance floor - boys watch outl

Hockey Captains - Ed and Pels One of Galenicals biggest clubs, Hockey is renowned for its activity on and off They train with Doctors and play regular

pitch.

weekend matches in intramural and local

leagues. Not many other

sports can claim

such

eventful inter uni matches

and their tours are unforgettable.

Lacrosse Captains - Ash and Jonnv Galenicals Lacrosse is all about having and enjoying a run about on the downs. Their flrst match of the term will be against a new Birmingham side so fingers crossed. Lacrosse is a friendly club that welcomes people of all standards, however beware of the nicknames! lt should be noted that, the nicknames, whilst harmless will not make any sense to anyone outside the team and will stick with you throughout your uni career.

fun

Squash Captain - Will One of the newest of Galenicals sports club is steady and strong. Quick reflexes and sharp eyes showed their skill in Birmingham. Regular training and matches against each other keeps individuals' competitive streaks at a healthy high ready for their next team match.

Badminton Captains - Vish Solid team spirit and committed players have resulted in a large and strong badminton team. They have already played their first match against Birmingham and are looking forward to a successful year.

Tennis Captains - Ellie and Will Tennis has already started its year successfully under solid leadership. Some very high quality tennis graced the courts in Birmingham followed by large scale partying. A friendly club welcome to all, with emphasis on taking part, playing and having fun.

Basketball Captain - Seb Strong leadership and talented players are hoping to have a successful year. Currently training for their NAMS tournament at the end of this term we wish them luck,

Swimming Captains - Amv and Sally Our newest sports club set up last year is thriving. Lots of new members together with familiar faces are hoping to enjoy a successful year.

Cricket Captain - Mark Our gentlemen's club has already had its first fixture away in Birmingham. Over the winter the boys will be in nets training ready to take victory over other medicals schools in their NAMS tournament.

For more lnformation on Galenicals sports checkout the website www.galenicals.org.uk under sports or contact us on s

ports@gal en i ca ls. org. u k

ll]-

Medics Surf Trip

--------

l''

On the 26th of October 6 medics went to Roadford Lake in Devon to check out the 6th Annual 'Aussie Kiss'. The lake was filled with over 500 student windsurfers, many of whom like myself, Tom (Francis), Jess (Robson Davies) and Fiona (Croft) had never stood on a windsurf board in our lives, Luckily there was plenty of good tuition from Hugh Sims Williams and the other experienced riders to get us going. Ner4ertheless we spent the first day falling on our faces/ into the sail/ on each other's faces. But once you finally get some real speed together, even for a few wobbling seconds, it's a great feeling. Nikki (Moon) having done this before had a few tricks up her sleeve but still managed to fall on her face every time Hugh was looking. Saturday night was an almighty Wild West themed piss up at Bude caravan park. There was a bar, there was a band and there was crowd surfing. The prize for the best windsurf 'chat' of the weekend would definitely go to Tom Francis for his line: 'it's just not windy enough for those one legged triple Diablos today Hugh, so don't think I'll be going out'. And the prize forthe most ill would go to Jess Robson Davies for her spending all of Saturday holed up in a caravan in Bude being violently sick. Fully recovered on Sunday however, Jess threw down some choice moves that Hugh would've been proud of. It was a great weekend away and I would recommend it to anyone. Will Duffin

SWK(Pf(FSS Alono Durock,

illustroted by Horrief O'Neill

^'{IqELLA

After o long doy on the words, ond owoy from the comforts of home in Bristol, it's olwoys nice to hove something to look forword to in the outumnol evenings. For my firm ond I, our traot of choice hos become'Nigello Wotch'. 8.30pm, Mondoy, in front of the tV. My job is to round uP the troops knocking on the bedroom doors ond shepherding everyone into the kitchen. This hos become rituol. Now, the moin ottraction of Ms Lowsons latest se?ies of culinory creotions is not the food. Nor is it the hope of learnrng something procticol. In foct, these progrommes ore far from wholesome ond homely. Personolly, I con't lelieve the BBC or some consumer wotchdog hos ollowed them to be aired before the 9pm wotershed. Nigello Lowson is obout on owful lot more thqn food. As we crowd oround the TV, the chuckles ond gosps of drsbelief reverberateaswe wotch Nigello glonce suggestively ot the comero through afew well coiffed woves of hoir. The sexuolly explicit content is incredible ond leoves us in no doubt that she is topping into more thon just our toste buds. T. feel sorry for the comeromon - he must be f ilming with a constont erection. And spore o thought for the soundmen - peering down from o height with their boom mikes onto the voluptuous bosom of the hostess. But it is not howNigella looks thot couses such o stir. It is her unrelenting flirting with the comero - with the oudience. Her mercilessly sexuol proposols ond her inexoroble love offoir with food spills over to such on extent thot it is impossibla to distinguish between her love of food ond her love of , well, sex. To put it ploinly, every episode of Nigello Express is okin to o public disploy of some kind of pornogrophic fetish. f om not exaggeratingl One week she spent the whole episode in her block silky nightgown, poroding oround her kitchen like o whore in o brothel, gouging on leftover poncakes smothered in whipped cresm ond stuffed moreishly rn between her pointed lips ond devoured in seconds. She even mode her "pussyfoot delight" breokfost drink thot "tostes every bit os good os it sounds". Whot's thot Nigello? The'pussy'or the'foot'??Every word thot comes out of her mouth, every gestve she mokes, every lick of her lips, is sexuolly orientoted ond not-so-discreetly hidden behind references to food. The very lotest episode sow Nigello moke homemode ice creom for o dinner porty. After midnight, she crept downstoirs (in the obligotory block nightgown) took the tub of ice cream from the freezer, proceeded to toke q scoop from her nightgown pocket (I know I like to keep my scooP in there - so much more procticol thon the cutlery drower) ond tuck into the leftoversl ft is oll just o little bit OTT and screams - "Food is better thon sex!|" No joke-if youhoven't seenher inoction,Irecommendgettingontothe caseASAPbeforetheseries ends. But if you hove missed ony deliciously devilish episodes,hereareafew guotes I've token from her recent episodes, ond whot she reallymeonsl:

ttltm a messy

"I'm always thinking ll

ll ll

quvul about food...." I've got a filthy

person....rt I love a bit of rough and tumble....

-ind.... ttl'm always hungry....tt

I have an insatiable

ttl'm not

a patient person...tt I want it, and I want

appetite, for sex....

t'I never leave home without a good meal...rr I need to be satiated, fill me up big boy....

"Sometimes, the only thing that will get me out of bed in the morning is the thoughts of a lovely

breakfast" I prefer to stay in bed all day and work up an appetite.. ..

BOOK REVIEW Borm Bruckmeier, are offering a novel range of pocket sized cards and books. Blackbag has reviewed one product in each of the ranges of 'Pocket Books','Pockettools' and'Pocketcards'' Pocket Book

These are a handy 9.5cm by 12.5cm

book, comprehensible and clear intended as a succinct, to learn t*.lI

Anatomy pocket

would recommend this for second year neuroanatomy. The neuro/cranial section is

particularly user friendly. lt is also a very useful

book for all third year attachments, particularly medicine,

musculoskeletal

and surgery. The material in this book is relevant for all medical

neurology,gastroenterology

students and because it's so easy to carry about, its bound to get used regularlY. Pockettool

The pockettool is an 8.5cm by 5.5cm booklet of plastic laminated cards. The point of these 'tools' is that they fit neatly into your pocket, are light, durable and laid-out so that you can find what you are looking for at quick glance.

pockettool

Anatomv Pocket The great thing about this book is that it tells you

all the things you need to know on a practical level, without any lengthy explanations. The

material is presented in the form of detailed figures and short concise texts. The drawings are clear and well labelled without being overly fussy. Many cross-

references throughout the particular chapters highlight anatomical relationships. Treatment of the cranial nerves is particularly valuable as it covers the cranial exit of each, its course, innervated structures etc and doesn't complicate things unnecessarily. Design:

Anatomy books are typically heavy, cumbersome and totally loathsome, however they are essential

for all med students and you will always need access to a good detailed anatomy book. This however is something you can bring anywhere' Who is it for?:

It's amazing the amount of information that can be squeezed into a little pile of cards! Having been introduced to ECGs in year 3 and having an idea

what's what, this pockettool

compiles

everything you need to know in a clinical context. The first few pages give the basics such as what a normal ECG should look like and how to

determine the axis. This is all represented graphically so there are no wordy explanations to trudge through. lt then continues to cover common clinical conditions such as hypertrophy' conduction abnormalities, myocardial ischaemia and arrhythmias. Each condition is covered in one page, with a typical ECG representation of it on the front and a definition and ECG changes explained on the back. The coverage of Ml's is particularly concise.

The back page can be used as

handY

measuring toolto calculate the rate and amplitude - hence the name'Pockettool'!

Design:

The cards can be swung upwards and don't open out like a book. lt is a little awkward to use, but as it's so small and the content so succinct, it is easy to find what you need. The compact size makes the pockettool practical for carrying around on the wards without being bulkY. Price: Net price f4.98. Pocketcards

The pocketcards are a larger, thinner version of the pocketools. They are 19cm by 8.5cm, making them a little less pocket friendly than their counterparts. Design:

ECG Pocketcard

The first two pages cover basically the same material as the pockettool, although much more compact and with a little less detail. The next page is dedicated to placing the leads. lt goes into more detail than is normally required by students. The fourth page however, gives a useful step by step guide to reading an ECG and is ideal

for

anyonewho

gets a bit stumped

presented with an ECG on the wards.

when

The cards are larger than the 'tools' so they are a bit easier to read and have fewer pages. However, they are less likely to fit into your pocket!

The price guides we received from the publishers do not include VAT and prices vary. I looked up the pocketcards on Amazon.co.uk and the RRP price for the ECG pocketcard set of 3 is 824.73 rather than the price quoted by the publishers of € 4.99. The cheapest price I could find on Amazon is €16.15. The pockettools are retailing on Amazon for €4.99 and the Pocket Anatomy RRP is €8.99 but can be bought new for as low as 84.28. I'd shop around to get the best price before buying.

These products are not widely available in stores in Bristol yet, but you can find them online at Amazon www.marston.co.uk or go to www.media4u.com for more information and for a list of topics in the ranges.

lf you would like to get two free titles in the product range, contact kado@media4u.com. They are looking for students to write reviews on their titles for Amazon and are offering free books as a reward. Nice!

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