SENSASIONAL LOVE, SIMON

The story I wish had been around when I was a closeted teen, in love with my best friend and imprisoned by heteronormativity. By KEVIN DU PLESSIS

In theatres from 29 June ISBN: 9780241330135

This is a huge freaking awesome deal! Well, that’s how Simon Spier would say it if he were writing this review. And I have to admit, I am totally feeling that description.

With the release of the movie adaption of the book Simon vs the Homo Sapiens Agenda, for the first time ever a gay story has been released into the mainstream pond for the youth, and that’s no small thing, let me tell you that.

I cried my little gay eyes out both reading the book and watching the movie. Now firstly, I won’t be giving away any spoilers so you can let your guard down. And secondly, I don’t know what to say to those readers out there who are planning on experiencing both, like I did. They are both brilliant. But you will have to decide which one you want to lead you to the thrilling reveal of who Simon’s secret pen pal lover is.

If you are anything like me, you will want to read the book first because the suspense of finding out who he is makes it a page-turner. It is special because it is so finely attune to the subtleties of today’s teen market without it being condescending. I read it with a glass of wine on a Sunday and honestly, I couldn’t put it down. This might be because I am so closely related to the subject matter but I really think everyone will feel the same. Parents, buy your kids a copy and then steal it for yourself, you won’t regret it!

Then again, if you are a diehard film addict, perhaps you would rather have all the theatrics of the audio-visual experience guide you to those happy half-sobs half-yelps-ofjoy. The adaption was done exceptionally well, and for those who love to compare books and their film adaptions, you

won’t be disappointed because the adaption is true with some quite brilliant solutions taking it from page to screen. Either way, I am giving the Simon-experience a big thumbs up.

Simon Spier is a ‘normal’ guy from a small community where being gay, openly gay at that, is a frightening thing for high school kids. It’s not that his family wouldn’t accept him, in fact they are as liberal as they come, but the fear of being perceived differently after coming out, of it changing people’s perception of who you are can be daunting. So what do we do? We keep it in, at all costs.

I mean, who wants to be the subject of jokes and pranks by the jocks and the bullies? Growing up and going through all the awkwardness of puberty and changing into an adult is hard enough without butt-sex jokes at lunch time.

Although it is no ground-breaking revelation that as gay people we should never have had to ‘come out’ in the first place, Love, Simon draws attention to this fact in a hilarious and heart-warming manner that kids and adults around the world can truly relate to. It’s the typical high school romantic comedy, but with a twist. And it is not only for gay kids, it’s for everyone. This story has the power to form a better idea of how ‘normal’ it really is to be gay, how your sexuality does not really have an influence on your personality.

It is scary looking back on my own high school years and realising that I was in such utter denial because my best friend once lay in bed beside me (which I was totally into) and said “Imagine how disgusting it would be for two men to lie in bed cuddling each other like normal people do”. And I agreed with him. Disgusting.

That utterance has stayed with me my entire life. It had a big part to play in my late coming out, especially because as I remember that friend, I now realise I was really very much in love with him. I had experienced aching feelings of longing whenever we were apart and I made him ‘friendship’ trinkets and dreamed about him at night.

To be quite fair, he was not all that passive in this situation. He would always choose to sleep next to me instead of anyone else. We even went through a phase at fourteen when we would playfully hump each other and “act like we were doing it with girls”. We ended up staying in the same room at boarding school and had set times during the day that we would actually have joint masturbation sessions, and then on our matric holiday, we had a set ritual of going to the showers together every day. So you tell me how I wasn’t going to fall in love with him.

I remember thinking to myself, still very much in denial, as we walked up to the showers from our camping site, “If I ever had to be gay, which I’m not, I would be gay for you.” A few years later, we were both going to different universities and by chance he was in town where I studied and we met up. He asked me “So are you still dating girls, at least?”

I was shocked. My heart raced because even though I had had a gay experience or two already, I dreaded anyone ever finding out. “Of course, don’t be stupid,” I said and changed the subject. But what did that one line actually give away that day? It confirmed to me that he had probably always known that I was gay, and that our close friendship was in some way his own gay experience since I am sure he is married to some girl by now, probably working with his dad on their farm. Maybe he found more sexual thrill out of our friendship than I ever gave him credit for.

I still love him, I think, but my internal homophobia dreads the day that I ever run into him or anyone from high school. I won’t be attending our ten-year reunion, which is supposed to happen this year, because I just dread facing everyone that I had lied to about my sexuality, now that I am finally out.

Love, Simon would have made the world of difference in my life if I had read the book or saw the movie when I was Simon’s age. It would have changed everything and I would have probably had the courage to be who I really was without all the unnecessary shame.

But here I am today, a loud and proud rainbow flag man with a thriving gay relationship working at the biggest gay publication in Africa. We all get where we really need to be in the end, but thanks to this movie and this book young kids will be spared a lot of heartache in a heteronormative world that is perhaps just a little bit more understanding!

Love, Kevin.