The College Press ————-Friday, 26th October 2012 Issue 1 Volume 8—————
The Halloween Issue Hairspray! Arms, Abs and Assets
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What’s Hot/ What’s Not
College Press Editorial Team Editors: Sorcha Lavelle-Walsh Ciara Maher
Student Contributors: Sarah Coller David Devaney Evin Magee Ruairà Finan Ciara Gardiner Dervla Collins` Becky Doherty Caroline Kane Sam Burke Aisling Wyer Millie Ahearn O’Donnell Niamh Disney Lauren Muldowney
Special Thanks To:
Mr. Doyle 2
Editorial Hi Everyone, We can’t believe the longest term of the year (9 weeks!) is already over . There’s a lot coming up in November, between third and sixth exams, the school musical Hairspray (keep an eye out for tickets on sale after mid-term) and preparing for Christmas in general. So take the next week to relax– we’ve earned it. Hope to see you all out trick-or-treating! Sorcha and Ciara :)
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What’s
Hot
and What’s
Hot:
Not
Not:
X Factor – Saturday night’s sorted...
X Factor – ...but missing it means being a
FIFA 13 – cue the lads going into hibernation.
Radiator races – We hear this winter’s going to be a chilly one in Newbridge
Hairspray the Musical – “You can’t stop the beat!”, so get your tickets
iPhone 5 – What’s the difference? Oh sorry, it’s ‘taller’.
Twilight: Breaking Dawn – The big finale... are you still Team Edward?
Facebook bullying – Even celebrities are starting to be targeted – no need.
Sport – Whether you’re playing, or a mad supporter on the sideline, competition season’s back with a bang.
TY Mini Company surveys – It’s that time of year again folks – we’ll buy a cupcake if you’ll leave us alone!
Fairtrade stuff in the vendos– even better if it’s chocolate!
Homework – Let me hear you say it
Peplum dresses – great for any shape this season.
No more Gregography – For all the new people in the school, we’re referring to former N.C. teacher Greg McInerney’s legendary Geography classes – you’ll be missed.
YAY OR NAY?! The new roll queue – no more crushing and claustrophobia, but to the haters – don’t be skipping!
“Noooooooo...”.
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By Sarah Coller
Interview with School Captain This new school year we have received yet another fantastic batch of school Captains, so the College Press took a few moments out of our school Captain, Grainne Carr’s busy day to see what makes her tick. Well done on becoming this year’s Captain, the achievement is well deserved, how does it feel so far?
To be honest, I still can’t believe I’m the school captain! It’s just so overwhelming and I have loved every minute of it so far – I think I’m still in shock! If you could meet anyone in the world dead or alive, who would it be and why?
I must say, I would love to meet Barack Obama because I think it would be a once in a lifetime opportunity to meet one of the most influential people in the world. What has been your proudest moment to date?
Either the day I got the school captain and it was announced to the whole school during mass or else the day I won my All-Ireland championship this summer in Irish dancing. What’s your favourite subject?
I really love music and I also quite enjoy English too so either or. What do you hope to study after the Leaving Cert?
At the moment I’m thinking of studying law and economics or law and politics in U.C.D. 5
Who’s your Buddy?
I have two buddies and their names are Eva and Kay. What annoys you?
Going on a long car journey or flight with my parents and realizing there’s no battery left in my iPod! What will you miss most about leaving school next year?
There are so many things I’ll miss, it’s too hard to just to pick one. I’ll definitely miss my year and all my good friends, all my teachers and just the general atmosphere of the school. What will you miss least?
Probably having to get up at quarter to 7 every morning and then coming home to do piles of homework and study late in the evening. Who is your hero?
Probably my mam. She has always been there for me and has never failed to lend a helping hand if I was ever struggling with anything – I owe a lot to her. Do you remember your first day here?
I remember it like it was yesterday! I hardly knew anyone and I was absolutely terrified at the size of the school and at the size of my year. In my primary school there were only 14 in my class so to go from that to 144 was a huge thing. What are some of your favourite memories made here?
Definitely being a part of the school musical each year – in TY and 5th year in particular. I also have loads of great memories from the ski trip in TY and performing in the Variety Show with some of my good friends. There are loads more but they would be some of my favourite. What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given?
Probably ‘what’s for you won’t go by you’ It always helps me to know that if I lost out on something I really wanted to do that something else more suited to me will arise so there’s no need to dwell on it. 6
Halloween Poems Spell to take over the world
Hallowe’en Spell
By Anonymous 1T
By Evin Magee 1T
As I start to plot and scheme
Stir and boil the rhinoceros toes
My wicked eyes will start to gleam
Along with the skin of a kangaroo’s nose.
And when my pot starts to bubble
Mash the banana and throw it in
The for you this really does spell trouble. The waft of the potion you’ll begin to win. Cut the bat’s heart in tiny bits
And as I glint and gleam daringly
Mix together the monkey nits.
I wonder how you can act so caringly
In it goes and swirl around
About other people and not you
Add the hyena’s ear and monkey ground.
Nor anybody knows what to do.
A pinch of this, a scoop of that, Finish it off with whale fat.
So when you hear the sound of a bell
The colour now is beginning to change
This just means I‘ve finished my spell.
Add cautiously the dog’s mange.
So listen hard. I‘ll try to be clear
Unscrew the bottle of the skunk’s gas
You really have a lot to fear.
And add it in mass. Bile from the camel is next to add.
My plan is good, my plan is mean
Be careful! The smell is excruciatingly bad!
And I can tell that you’re not keen So you can run, run, run
For all that remains, it goes in in one lot.
But now I own everyone!!!
Your potion is made in one big black pot 7
Hallowe’en Spells The spell is done,
Ruairí Finan 1T
Time now to have fun. The world is mine!
Ear of dog,
You’ll never escape,
Foot of frog,
No matter how far you climb!
Heart of snack, Boil and bake Like a cake
Come around, Come around. Dance about the cauldron go! Steaming pot,
Thank you to the first
Bubble and glow.
years for contributing The tongue of a duck And bat’s delight,
their halloween poetry
Hoof of buck,
to this issue of the
Black as the night.
College Press.
Come around, Come around. Dance about the cauldron go! Steaming pot, Bubble and glow.
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Abs, Arms and Assets By Ciara Gardiner & Dervla Collins THE SENIOR CUP TEAM: skilful, gifted, hardworking, but what the girls really want to know are their ACTUAL talents. So the college press sent out their research team (headed by Dervla Collins and Ciara Gardiner) to uncover these mysteries. The stress and tension this survey evoked within the team was nearly tangible, with rumours of blackmail and cheating. It soon became clear that the guys were more concerned with what the girls thought of them than the truth. So after all the drama we can finally reveal the results.
These results were compiled after surveying eighty fifth and sixth year girls and may be controversial. WHO DO YOU THINK CAN BENCH THE MOST? Winner 6th year- Brian Mooney Winner 5th year- Hugh O'Donnell 2nd place- Ed Wynne 3rd place- Charlie Ryan Our sources have told us that Hugh is the real winner here but he declined to comment on how much he can actually bench. WHO DO YOU THINK HAS THE MOST DEFINED 6 PACK? Winner 6th year- Charlie Ryan Winner 5th year- Tom Brady 2nd place- Conall Murphy 3rd place- Phil Ryan This was the most anticipated question with surprising results. Deputy captain Conall Murphy had this to say about his award; "It's not even an ab, it's the bottom of my sternum. I don't even 9 do rugby?� Many of the girls have been requesting photographic evidence of the winners, which we're still waiting for.
WHO DO YOU THINK HAS THE BIGEST ARMS? Winner 6th year- Brian Hayden Winner 5th year- Cormac Nugent 2nd place- Hugh O’Donnell 3rd place- Paddy Kyne and Ed Wynne This was the first draw we got in the survey. We suggested a fight between Paddy and Ed but they refused. We will let you decide this one for yourselves. WHO DO YOU THINK CAN DO THE MOST PRESS UPS? Winner 6th year- Charlie Ryan Winner 5th year- Mark Sutton and Niall Delahunt 2nd place- Brian Mooney 3rd Place- Brian Hayden Although the girl’s results were quite accurate, statistics show that the real winner here is Brian Mooney, rumoured to be capable of 75! WHO GETS THE MOST ATTENTION FROM THE LADIES? 6th year- Charlie Ryan 5th year- Matt Stapleton 2nd place- Tom Brady 3rd place- Oisín Mc Knight, Danny O'Mahony, Brian Hayden, Mark Sutton, Cormac Nugent, Mark Kavanagh and Sean Healy. A very awkward award category with many unavailable boys dominating the polls. But don't worry girls there are still plenty of single guys left.
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WHO DO YOU THINK SINGS IN THE SHOWER? Winner 6th year- Charlie Ryan Winner 5th year- Mark Sutton 2nd place- Barry Finan and Joe Darcy 3rd place- Niall Delahunt "Baby monkey on a pig" is a rumoured favourite. If you want to see some of our rugby/musical talent for yourself, many of the nominees for this category will be on display in this year’s musical, Hairspray. WHO DO YOU THINK WORKS OUT THE MOST? Winner 6th year- Danny O'Mahony Winner 5th year- Cormac Nugent 2nd place- Brian Hayden and Charlie Ryan 3rd place- Brian Mooney and Richie Dalton Richie Dalton? HE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE
Overall our findings revealed that the 5th years were more popular than the 6th years. However we would advise that egos should not be inflated or crushed based on these findings as these girls are very delusional. So don't let it go to your heads lads.
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Halloween Facts 1 Halloween is the second highest grossing commercial holiday after Christmas.
2 Ireland is typically believed to be the birthplace of Halloween. 3 Have you ever wondered how trick-or-treating began? On All Hallows' Eve, the Celts would leave food on their doorsteps to keep the hungry ghosts from entering their homes.
4 Halloween celebrations in Hong Kong are known as Yue Lan or the ―Festival of the Hungry Ghosts‖.
5 Most Popular Costumes for Adults: Witch, Vampire, Zombie, Cat, Devil, Athlete, Police Officer, Tranny.
6 Most Popular Costumes for Children: Princess, Witch, Spiderman, Monster, Vampire, Ghost.
7 In America, Halloween sweets sales average at about 2 billion dollars annually.
8 Harry Houdini died on Halloween in 1926. 9 ‘Samhainophobia’ is the fear of Halloween. 10 ―Girl Code: Halloween is the one night a year where a girl can dress like a total slut and other girls can’t say anything about it.‖ – Cady, Mean Girls. 12
CONCERN DEBATING By Mr. Doyle It was Sophie’s choice… I could wrap myself up and snuggle by the fire in anxious anticipation for the start of Downton Abbey or I could brave the torrential rain and trudge down to the cold dark school on a miserable Wednesday evening. Luckily I strayed from my usual character traits, donned my waders and made the arduous expedition. The reason was simply to witness our fantastic Concern debating theme trash the opposition in the initial rounds of the Concern debating league. Out team comprising of Grainne Carr (captain), Ciara Maher, Jeffrey Hovenden Keane and Chloe O' Reilly were fantastic. The ferocious, focused and even funny debating styles left outshone the very strong team from Holy Family, Rathcoole. Well done to Ms. C Kelly and Ms. D Murphy who had obviously spent hours putting the team through their paces as they were so well prepped. The support from parents, students and staff was also phenomenal. The entire evening was managed perfectly by Patrick Kyne whose bell skills were complemented by the judging panel. Sorcha Lavelle Walsh was an excellent chairperson who knows when to say “enough is enough” and manage a crowd. The talent and skill displayed by all involved is a credit to our school. You may also have noticed the names of our two esteemed editors above, that leaves me to ask the question ... Is there anything they can’t do??? 13
P.s. Downton #devastated!
LOOPER Would you kill you? This is the question writer/director of Looper, Rian Johnson poses in this must see Sci-fi Thriller of the season. To tell you the truth this is the first time I’ve ever heard of Johnson, but most definitely won’t be the last after creating such a unique piece of science fiction cinema. With cast consisting of Joseph Gorgon Levitt, Emily Blunt, the aging but brilliant Bruce Willis and not to mention a creepy telekinetic 10 year old (who really looks about four which makes it all the creepier)., who has superpower tantrums of rage throughout the movie. They make a futuristic and slightly odd bunch. In the year 2044 Joe Simmons (Gordon-Levitt), a hired hit man, passively leans against his car among the open plains of Arkansas. The skyline of the city shadows overhead as he empties his blunder bust into the chest of his first victim of the day. That sounds a bit too easy, you say. Well it is. All until Mr. Simmons comes upon his final contract: himself. Well how is that possible? Bearing in mind we are viewing from the genre of Sci-fi, they have access to time travel which means they can ponder through different time zones- and by “they”, I mean the organised crime gangs of the year 2074 (most notoriously the Mafia). So when they want to assist in the “departure” of another guy they simply send him back blind and gagged with payment to Simmons thirty years in the past, which wipes the poor fella clean off the face of the Earth with no record of existence what so ever. To close a contract the mob send the hit men (known as loopers) in the future to be killed by themselves in the past and that’s where Mr Bruce Willis comes in as the thirty year older Joe Simmons, who does not want to go down without a fight thus forming the basis of our story. Emily Blunt enters as the lady of the show and as mother of a gifted but eerie boy with a hidden past that only adds more depth and suspense to an already exciting movie. An extremely original piece of writing that backs the theme of moral 14decision with a sense of mystery and anticipation which only keeps us guessing.
Originally I had mixed thoughts about the whole Sci-fi element which can sometimes seem so fake you know it was made in an underground basement beneath Hollywood’s sunset boulevard, but with Looper, no. Johnson touches on the Sci-fi aspect with taste, keeping a foundation of reality which makes it more accessible and plausible which for me was the key. What’s worse than having to watch 120 minutes of what seems like the inside of a printer leaving you with nothing but a disappointing show and a headache? An action packed film which makes you rack your brain on how Bruce Willis managed to pull off some of the moves, but I guess he just doesn’t die hard. A very interesting soundtrack and some stylish camera work left me with further admiration of Johnson, however some things didn’t go unnoticed. I personally didn’t like Gordon Levitt in it, I felt his character was a little under developed and to say it straight out a little bland. I couldn’t connect with him as much, leaving me slightly detached, which did lead to a little scepticism from me, seeing that he is the main character and all. I felt he could have done that bit better (which by the way isn’t an attack on Gordon Levitt, just watch Inception). Apart from this Looper packs a huge punch with its gripping storyline and fast paced action sequences that basically make you mouth the word awesome again and again. Looper is truly a great piece of original writing and film-making that undeniably will see you leaving the theatre with a smile. At first the plot may grab you as a surprise and slightly puzzling but don’t fret as it does piece together quite quickly. Looper is a thinker’s show and if you prefer throwing popcorn at kids in the front row this may not be for you. Which reminds me, don’t go see this movie with a large group of people who like to annoy cinema lovers with their random laughing at things that just showcase their pre-school sense of humour, as it will simply leave you in a constant loop of “Wait….. what the hell?”. 15 David Devaney
Our interview with Ms. Coogan By Becky and Caroline 1 What do you think of the school so far? The school’s a lovely place and the students are all friendly, well it’s a big building so I am getting lost like all the “newbies” but I’m starting to know my way around.
2 What subjects are you teaching? At the moment I am teaching Music, Geography, history and CSPE.
3 Is everyone friendly e.g. all the teachers and staff? I’m getting along really well with all the teachers and staff and everyone’s really friendly
4 On average how many classes do you have per day? A day… every day is different some days I could have 4 and others I could have 8 so 4-8 classes per day.
5 What did you do before you came to this school? I worked in another school and before that I was at college!
6 What years do you teach? I teach just junior years so first, second, third and T.Y.
Thank you and enjoy Newbridge16College!
By Sam Burke
Hairspray Well it’s that time of the year again, The Newbridge College musical. This year our show will be “Hairspray”. This is a modern musical as it first was released in the cinema in 1988 starring Sonny Bono, Ruth Brown and a character called Divine, it also starred Ricki Lake who went on to become a famous talk show host. The production first went to Broadway in 2002 and another movie remake in 2007 starring John Travolta. The play went on to win an award for best musical score. The rehearsals started a few weeks ago, this year the lead girl is Emma Jane Grant, and the role of Edna is played by Hugh O’ Donnell, for some reason this role is always played by a man, braver man than I am! The director is Ms Graham, and once again our producer is Ms Lenehan. The play will be open for four days with two matinee’s Wednesday the 21’st of November and Friday the 23’rd of November, with evening performances on Thursday the 22nd through to Saturday the 24th. I’m hoping to see a lot of you there to support the great cast this year. 17
Celebrity Divorce By Aisling Wyer From Katie and Tom to Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis, it's been a split-filled summer for a number of celebrity couples. The topic of divorce can be argued ‘til death in a multitude of ways. There is a saying that if a famous couple makes it to their fifth year wedding anniversary, they've reached a milestone. With celebrities making daily headlines with their litigious antics and steamy scandals, it's no wonder that the public is fascinated. But one has to wonder why these "golden" couples divorce almost as quickly as they marry. The most popular happenings in Hollywood seem to be those born on film sets. Long shooting hours combined with exotic locations creates the kind of climate that can encourage a certain amount of intimacy. People in typical 9-5 jobs often mention how easy it is to become involved with members of the workplace. The same conditions apply within the circle of fame. The basis is fairly simple: having fame and working in a "fish bowl" of sorts provides the ideal temperature for extramarital affairs. A lot of emotional and physical energy is needed when working together closely on a project and that brings co-stars together. Pair that with the tension of being apart from one's spouse (on a consistent basis) and divorce seems inevitable. Everyone knows that hot romances makes a good reading. On that same note, so does divorce. The paparazzi make their living off of the visual tidbits they're able to stretch into gossip stories. If said person A is photographed hugging mysterious blonde B, the photos are on-line almost as soon as the hug is complete (sometimes sooner)! Friendly hugs, pecks on the cheek, even casual grooming can all be misconstrued as romantic gestures in the eyes of the paparazzi. Collect a few quotes from "Insiders" and "Sources", and a juicy headline has been born. It only takes a few of these stories to circulate and cause problems for famous married couples. John Fugelson (American actor, television personality and stand-up comedian) was seen to have quoted on Twitter that "Celebrity divorce is sad, but not as sad as noncelebrities who care about Celebrity divorce ". Nothing can beat the words of a comedian. 18
Imagine that every date you had was televised or photographed for the world to see. Celebrities in public can be tricky. The more famed one is, the harder it is to engage in the kinds of activities that "normal" people engage in. Though this may not be the case for all celebrities, for some, grabbing dinner and a movie often involves publicists, stylists, and bodyguards. With all the distractions of a publicized lifestyle, it can be quite difficult getting to know someone on a deeper level. Thus, the things that many people discover during the traditional dating process are sometimes overlooked completely leading to whirlwind romances and ultimately quick divorces. Sometimes the public forgets that underneath the glamour of "celebrity-dom", the rich and famous are simply real people who make the same kinds of mistakes as the rest of us. That being said, like many in the world, they marry each other for the wrong reasons. It's very enticing to become infatuated with a new person and fall head over heels. This happens frequently in Hollywood, and quite frankly it's often difficult to distinguish infatuation from real love. This is why so many couples get married as quickly as they divorce. These more recent times, people simply don't know how to make good relationships - and it isn't just celebrities. It's frightening once the euphoric high has worn off and people get to the day-to-day realities of living with someone. Living together as a couple is hard business, it requires work and dedication, commitment, and willingness to give way. Unfortunately many celebrities aren't ready for this kind of commitment. Successful marriage is a hard thing these days for anybody, everything happens so fast, and we've somehow come to believe that love is heart-pounding, mad, impetuous and romantic, when sometimes it is everything but. Real love has bumps and bruises. As does divorce, take the case of NBA star Michael Jordan who divorced his wife Juanita in 2007 after 17 years of marriage. His divorce cost him a total of $168 million worth of assets. Their marriage in particular must have taken a few too many bruises. Much like singer Neil Diamond divorced Marcia Murphey in 1994 after 25 years of marriage. The total assets involved: $150 million. Golf champ Tiger Woods and 19 model Elin Nordegren after six years of marriage.
Total assets involved: $100 million. Producer/director Steven Spielberg and actress Amy Irving divorced in 1989 after four years of marriage. Total assets involved: $100 million. Actress/singer Madonna and director Guy Ritchie divorced in 2008 after eight years of marriage. Total assets involved: Between $76 to $92 million. And lastly Beatles legend Paul McCartney and second wife, Heather Mills, engaged in a nasty divorce in 2008 after six years of marriage. Total assets involved: $48.5 million. These have been said to be amongst the most expensive divorces in history. Just goes to show- think before you marry! Take Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock for instance. They uttered multiple I Do's in a tumultuous wedding "spree" of sorts taking time out during their vacation to hold multiple weddings in different locations. A few short months later, Pamela, who had in the past called off a previous engagement to Kid Rock---filed for divorce. She has been quoted as saying: "Don't get married on vacation..." which could easily imply that her motives for marrying the rocker were ill-advised. Again, I will say that it is a topic that can be discussed endlessly but nothing will take away the thrill of reading a classic Hollywood romance. Nobody can deny that divorce sells and right now that's the key!
Being a first year Hi, My name is Millie Ahearn O'Donnell and I'm going to tell you about what first year is like for me so far ....... Newbridge College has been the best experience of my life, (yeah so I'm only 12!) I remember when I was coming to the end of 6th class my friends (and me!) cried as we didn't want to leave it all behind! Now I'm in Secondary School...... little old me in Newbridge College, totes amazeballs! Why couldn't Primary have been 20 as great as this!!!!
Lets face it ... the school makes me happy! I love my friends they are... everyone! Everyone is lovely and they all treat you with respect! I love that! So subject wise... well as you all know we have to do all the subjects in first year, all 19 that is! Just to get a taster you know... Honestly I think that’s the best way to have it! I mean having to pick 2 out of 6 subjects you've never done before.. HOW?? Ok so it’s a little bit more work but so what! My favourite subject is... um...ehhh.....Science! I have the best teacher ever! Miss Crummy... the amount of experiments we do is unreal and they're all really fun apart from the odd one, I mean who cares about the volume of a rock! I don't know there's just something about science, I couldn't tell you! I sit beside the FUNNIEST most HYPER human being I know! Her name is Becky Doherty, she's one of my bestest bestest friends ever! Along with Caroline Kane and ChataMari Viglino and...umm...ehhhoh yea! EVERYONE!!! Anyway back to Science...the other day in Science we were preforming a Chromatography experiment - there were Hot Plates involved so we had to wear safety goggles, we looked ridiculous! I remember Becky sitting at the table when I walked over with my goggles on, her immediate reaction was.... fall on the floor laughing, sure that's embarrassing for some but I couldn't help but laugh myself so I joined her in giggles! The one negative thing I have to say is... WEEKEND HOMEWORK!!!!! WHYYY!!!! But sure... what's the point in frowning over that one little thing... exactly there is no point! Just a few of my experiences of 1st year... Hopefully there will be many 21 more!
Kildare animal foundation We started off our C.S.P.E. classes proposing ideas for what was to be a project, focussing on one of the seven concepts of C.S.P.E., rights and responsibilities, human dignity, stewardship, development, democracy, law or interdependence. We put forward many ideas. After a while, we came to a decision to visit the Kildare animal foundation to understand more of the rights and responsibilities of animals. We divided the jobs up so everyone could play their part. Finance was recorded, transport was arranged, permission was asked for, calls were made, decisions were negotiated, and fundraising took place. October 1st, the day had finally arrived. We all hopped off the bus to the welcome of Michelle, one of the volunteers at the shelter. Inside the main area of the house were many cats, and a dog. They all seemed at ease, very comfortable and at home. Many of the cats lazed around as if they hadn’t a care in the world, and they obviously felt at home in the now familiar surroundings. Michelle talked to us about the work they do, how the shelter is run and of some of the most recent, shocking stories of abuse of animals and how the shelter helped these animals to recover. At times she got emotional, remembering the harm that was done to these innocent animals. It brought a tear to everyone’s eye when she broke down talking of a greyhound, who was starved and malnourished by a previous owner. Michelle outlined the main differences between the shelter and other pet farms and pounds. In other places where animals are taken in, they are soon put down if someone hasn’t claimed or adopted them. Sometimes the animals are given a week or even less before they are put to sleep! It was clearly stated that the foundation was only for sick and injured animals..... in other words, they don’t just take any animal off the street. 22
The shelter was crowded enough already anyway with hundreds upon hundreds of sick animals trying to recover from what has been done to them. With this amount of animals, the bill for the vet was 4,000 euro per month! This wasn’t even the biggest financial struggle.... food has to be bought also, for every single animal in the shelter. With money like this being spent, they have to have some sort of money income, but they actually rely on donations and standing orders made by a few generous people. Although the charity given by the volunteers and donators at the shelter is making a difference, Ireland is still the worst country in the world for the number of animals being used and abused. We should all hang our heads in shame with that title. After the talk, Michelle then brought us in and around a courtyard, which had rooms and sectioned off areas surrounding it, for different animals. The animals were purposefully put where they are, some animals don’t get on well together, some don’t get along well with different types of animals etc. All of the dogs were really friendly. It was hard to believe what they had gone through before, as they appeared so happy and content now. There was one room used especially for some rare animals that the volunteers came across. Inside were guinea pigs, hamsters, hedgehogs, an owl, a ferret, a duck and turtles. They were really special creatures and we just couldn’t take our eyes off them. As a class we learned a lot from our visit to the Kildare animal foundation. We’d like to thank Richard O’Brien buses for their services and to the volunteers at the shelter for taking time out to talk to us. By Niamh Disney 23
ar ol Ye o h c ew S The N Five short but essential tips to help you survive the days before summer 2013... Tip #1: Food
The most essential part of any student’s daily routine. Whether it’s the cornflakes in the morning that give you an extra five minutes of delay, the breakfast role at break that makes life worth living or that chocolate bar in the evening that whispers to you it’s ok, food makes life in general just better. Tip #2: Excuses No need for pretence here, the College Press is a circle of trust. We’ve all done it- the “but I’ve so much homework” moan of pain to get you out of chores. Particularly effective if accompanied by, “and I really wanted to do well in this test”- your parents should be so impressed by this sudden desire to do well in school that they clean your room for you. Tip #3: Your School Bag
Pillow, friend, defence mechanism- yours is what you make it. Tip #4: Nobody’s Listening
Reading in class is a horror/honour dreaded by many a student. But you must remember, everybody else is too busy talking/ sleeping/ staring out the window wondering what’s for dinner, that they won’t be paying attention to you.
Tip #5: The Radiator Seat
To some, it may just be a chair beside a device for heating a room consisting of a metal case connected by pipes through which hot water is pumped by a central heating system. But you know it is so much more. Bag it if you can. 24
Horoscopes
Scorpio (oct 24-nov 22)
Gemini(may 22- jun 22)
If you want to change things up in your life look at joining a new club or activity.
Things haven't been going Your way lately but they're About to get a lot better.
Sagittarius (nov 23- dec 21)
Cancer(jun 23 - jul 23)
An exciting opportunity Will arise this month , be wise In your decision.
Things are looking up Right now, so now is the Time to start thinking of others. Surprise someone with a random Act of kindness!
Capricorn( dec 22- jan 20) Someone may just tell you something very secret this month. You'll be tempted to spill, just remember that it's not worth it.
Leo ( jul 24- aug 23) You may love to be the centre Of attention but now's The time to let someone else Be in the spotlight.
Aquarius( jan 21- feb 19) Now is a good tie to open your Mind to new ideas you may Have overlooked before now.
Pisces( feb 20- mar 20) Make an effort to be kinder To everybody this month.
Virgo( aug 24- sep 23) Now is your chance to get Your head stuck in the books. If you don't start now you'll never catch up.
Libra( sep 24- oct 23)
Aries( mar 21-apr20)
Make sure you give yourself some time to relax as a long month is ahead.
This month you're at the top Of your game, put in some Hard work and you'll achieve Your goals.
Taurus(apr 21- may 21) Stay away from red doors this Month...trust me.
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By Lauren Muldowney
Miscellany ~ Bill Gates ~ Love him or hate him , he sure hits the nail on the head with this.!!! Bill Gates gave a speech at a High School about eleven (11) things they did NOT and will NOT learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world. Rule 1 : Life is not fair - get used to it! Rule 2 : The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself. Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both. Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: They called it opportunity. Rule 6 : If you mess up, it's NOT your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them. Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were: so before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room... Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT . In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. *This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life. Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. *Do that on your own time. Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs. Rule 11 : Be nice to NERDS . Chances are you'll end up working for one. 26
A LITTLE WRY HUMOUR Accept the fact that some days you’re the pigeon, some days you’re the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Drive carefully; it’s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker. If you can’t be kind, at least be vague. If you lend somebody €20 and never see it again, it was probably worth the expense. Never buy a car you can’t push. Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time because then you won’t have a leg to stand on. It may be your purpose in life to be a warning to others.
Halloween Jokes Why isn't Dracula invited to many Halloween parties? Because he's a pain in the neck. How do you tell twin witches apart? You can't tell which witch is which. Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist? To improve his bite. What do you call someone who puts poison in someone's corn flakes? A cereal killer. What is a vampire's favourite mode of transportation? A blood vessel. Where do ghosts go swimming? The dead sea. Why was the witch kicked out of witching school? Because she flunked spelling.
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Happy Halloween from the College Press!
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