Geist 119 by Geist Magazine

TIME ZONES The Insulin Soldiers / Lady Wrestler Downed at 43 / Short Long-Distance Lit NUMBER$9.95119

Abigandheartfeltthankstothefollowingdonorsfortheirgenerouscontributiontotheannual Geist fundraisingcampaign.Everydollarfromthefundraisingcampaigngoesrightbackintomaking Geist theweirdandwonderfulmagazinelovedbyreadersalloverthecountry. Ourgenerousdonors: Anonymous(10) CarolineAdderson KenAlexander DilinBaker RobinBaugh BarbaraBaydala AlejandraBertorini JoanBevington BarbaraBlack KrissBoggild NancyCampbell WendyChin RebekahChotem ScottAndrewChristensen BarbaraCollishaw SarahColquhoun DennisCooley RossCrockford JaneClaireCrosby SusanCubitt SandraCurrie KimDeane RobynneEagan BrianEckert DavidElenbaas CaryFagan M.A.C.Farrant FrankFerrucci DanielFrancis JackGarton MicheleGenest HelenGodolphin Godolphin-HendersonFamily LeniGoggins JimLowe&BrianGoth DeborahHackett MichelleHart P.E.Holmes JaneHope AlisonHughes GeorgeK.Ilsley TaslimJaffer JanetJury LyndaKerr KenKlonsky HannaandPiotrKozlowski ShelleyKozlowski JocelynKuang ConnieKuhns BillKummer KenLythall JodiMacAulay DonnaMacdonald IanMacdonald JohnD.Mackenzie EmilyMacKinnon RobMacnab ErinMacNair RickMaddocks TobyMalloy JohnManning ÉmileMartel ThadMcIlroy JohnMillard KathrynMockler MarcMullo PeterMurphy KelseaO’Connor Mary-LynnOgilvie PattyOsborne YvesPaillon LaurenPratt PeterRaynham JasonRehel JudithRiddell FredRingham LauraRobinson AdonnaRudolph ReneeSarojiniSaklikar ShylaSeller RosemarySidle JeffreySimser RoniSimunovic Hans-PeterSkaliks GwenSoper CarolHarveySteski LindaK.Thompson BrendaThomson CarmenTiampo K.Timewell ArithavanHerk AdelinaVlas LorenzvonFersen PeterWarren TrishWhite WendyC.Williams LindeZingaro Tolearnmoreandtojointhislistofgenerouspeople,visitgeist.com/donate. THANKYOUFORSUPPORTINGGEIST!

2Geist119Winter2021 Volume 29 · Number 119 · Winter2021 FEATURES TRAVELLIT WinnersoftheOccasionalGeist ShortLong-DistanceWritingContest 38 DON’TWORRY, LEONARDOHASAPLAN K’ariFisher Beingawarriorprincessisalotlikebeing anarchetypeofhumanpotential 42 Photofrom“TheInsulinSoldiers,”page29. THEINSULINSOLDIERS KristendenHartog Itwasasthoughamagicpotionhad broughthimbacktolife 29

3 Ideas&Culture,MadeinCanada NOTES&DISPATCHES SaraCassidy FlyingtheCoop 7 JamesPollock Flashlight 8 RobynLudwig BlackVelvet,IfYouPlease 9 HenryDoyle SundayMorningSidewalk 10 TerenceByrnes Ash 11 StephenSmith TheAcknowledgements 12 FINDINGS 14 EthicalRemembering Bravado NewNormalWords LadyWrestlerDownedat43 Lorembarnakcurses SnowDay Takeaway ASingleSentence OldSeeds Buttonsfrom“OutNorth” andmore… COLUMNS AFTERLIFEOFCULTURE ReheatedRaces StephenHenighan 52 ONFUTURITY DismantlingtheMythoftheHero CherylThompson 54 DEPARTMENTS MISCELLANY 4 ENDNOTES 58 PUZZLE 64 COVERIMAGE:“PeachBlossomIsland(GrowLamp)” byHowieTsui,2019,pigmentonmulberrypaper.This workbelongstotheseries“ParallaxChambers,”which bringstogetherinkdrawingandcomputerprogramming toblendimageryfrommartialartsfictionandthe KowloonWalledCity,anungovernedenclavethatexisted betweenthebordersofChinaandHongKongfrom 1898to1994.Seethewholeseriesathowietsui.com.

ADMINISTRATION Intern: SamScott Volunteers: KelseaO’Connor, Patty Osborne,JennesiaPedri

PROOFREADER HelenGodolphin ACCOUNTANT MindyAbramowitz CGA,CPA CIRCULATION LarryWyatt

PUBLISHER,EDITOR-IN-CHIEF AnnMarieMacKinnon(Outgoing)

TOYVERSIONRACISM “ToyVersionRacism”(No.116)isawell writtenandinformativereport.Desmond Colegivesdetailedevidenceofthehistory ofsystemicracisminToronto,particularly thecardingofracializedpeople.After readingthisarticle,Iwillbereadinghis book, TheSkinWe’reIn.Thankyoufor publishingsuchhighqualityjournalism oncurrentandcontroversialtopics.

—E.Crawford CHECKEREDPAST Irecentlydiscovered“CheckeredPast” byRobertEverett-Green(No.99),a wonderfularticleaboutasportscoatthat belongedtomylatebrother-in-law, WalterBuhlFordIII,inthe1960s.I washappytolearnthatBuhl’scoathad foundanewhomeandthatitscraftsmanshipwastrulyappreciated.Iknow Buhlwouldhavelovedthatitwasvalued andwellcaredfor.

MISCELLANY

PUBLISHEDBY TheGeistFoundation EXECUTIVEDIRECTOR AprilThompson(Incumbent)

STOLENGENERATION

IcametolearnaboutRandyFredand hisremarkablestoryafterreadingaCBC article.IliveinBrisbane,Australia,where thestainofthestolengeneration(Australia’sversionoftheresidentialschool system)permeateslifetothisday.I’m sogratefulthatapublicationlikeyours existstobroadenthenationaldiscourse. G’dayandthankyoufromAustralia. —Farah,Brisbane READINGANDREALIZING IusedtovisittheFredfamilyhomewhen Iwasyounger,andfriendswithoneof Randy’schildren.Throughthoseyears, IneverknewIwasinthehomeofaman whowouldhelprectifythewrongsdone toIndigenouspeople.Iknewaboutthe casehewasinvolvedin(where,inthelate ‘90s,Fredandothersurvivorsofthe AlberniIndianResidentialSchoolsued theGovernmentofCanadaandUnited ChurchofCanadafortheircomplicity intheabuseofstudents),butthat’sallit wastome:acase.HereIamnowalmost twentyyearslater,readingandrealizing. IwonderifallthosetimesIwalkedinto theirhomeandsawRandyFredquietly typingawayonhiscomputer,hewas workingonopeningtheeyesofCanadians toinjustice,changinghistorywithoutmy knowingit.MyrespectfortheentireFred familyisendless. —RaymondBellSurette Read“ResistanceandRenewal” byRandyFredin Geist 118.

WEBARCHITECTS MetroPublisher DISTRIBUTION MagazinesCanada MANAGINGEDITOREMERITUS BarbaraZatyko

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MasonZeinalibiked101kmarounddowntownToronto,trackinghisrouteusingStrava,anapp thatletsuserstrackandmaptheirfitnessactivitiesusingGPS.Zeinalisubmittedtheresultstoa StravaartcontesthostedbytheUniversityofTorontoRoadRacingClub,whichhe,ofcourse,won.

ENDNOTESEDITOR MichaelHayward CONTRIBUTINGEDITORS JordanAbel,BartoszBarczak,Kevin Barefoot,KathyBattye,TrevorBattye, andreabennett,JillBoettger,Jesmine Cham,AnsonChing,C.E.Coughlan, LaurenDembicky,MelissaEdwards, RobertEverett-Green,DanielFrancis, RandyFred,LilyGontard,Michael Hayward,JonathanHeggen,Gillian Jerome,JocelynKuang,BrianLam, ThadMcIlroy,BillehNickerson, ChristineNovosel,KelseaO’Connor, PattyOsborne,EricPeterson,DanPost, DebbyReis,KrisRothstein,Norbert Ruebsaat,JaneSilcott,RoniSimunovic, PaulTough,EricUhlich,Michellevan derMerwe

4Geist119Winter2021

FIRSTSUBSCRIBER JaneSpringer MOSTVALUABLEPUZZLERS JimLowe&BrianGoth

D.C.JoshSpauldingIII

BRAINTRUST StephenOsborne,MarySchendlinger Co-founders,ConsultingPublishers DESIGNER EricUhlich LAYOUT VancouverDesktopPublishingCentre

ADMINANDCIRCULATIONMANAGER SylviaTran

ASSOCIATEEDITOR MichałKozłowski(Outgoing) TanviBhatia(Incumbent)

MorrisLum isaTrinidadian-bornphotographer/artist whoseworkhasbeenexhibitedandscreenedacrossNorth America.Theimagesthataccompany“Don’tWorry,Leonardo HasaPlan”byK’ariFisheronpages42-50arefromhisseries “VisitorsInformation,”aninvestigationofthehistorical,commercialandresidentialsitesthatsurroundSimcoeStreetin Oshawa,ON.Seemoreatmorrislum.ca.

ARTISTSINTHISISSUE

WRITETOGEIST

G Geist ispublishedfourtimesayear. Contentscopyright©2021 TheGeistFoundation.Allrightsreserved. Subscriptions: inCanada:$27(1year);inthe UnitedStates:$40;andelsewhere:$45. VisaandMasterCardaccepted. Correspondenceandinquiries: subs@geist.com,advertising@geist.com, letters@geist.com,editor@geist.com. Include SASE withCanadianpostageor IRC withallsubmissionsandqueries. #210–111WestHastingsStreet VancouverBCCanada V6B1H4 Submissionguidelinesareavailableat geist.com. ISSN 1181-6554. Geist swapsitssubscriberlistwithother culturalmagazinesforone-timemailings. Pleasecontactusifyouprefernottoreceive thesemailings. PublicationsMailAgreement40069678 RegistrationNo.07582 ReturnundeliverableCanadianaddressesto: CirculationDepartment, #210–111WestHastingsStreet VancouverBCCanada V6B1H4 Email:geist@geist.com Tel:(604)681-9161,1-888-GEIST-EH; Fax:(604)677-6319;Web:geist.com Geist isamemberofMagazinesCanadaand theMagazineAssociationofBC.Indexedin the CanadianLiteraryPeriodicalsIndex and availableonProquest.

TheArQuives, thelargestindependentLGBTQ2+archiveintheworld.Since 1973,theorganizationhasbeendedicatedtocollecting,preserving,andcelebratingthestoriesandhistoriesofLGBTQ2+ peopleinCanada.Theimageswereoriginallypublishedin Out North:AnArchiveofQueerActivismandKinshipinCanada (Figure 1Publishing)byCraigJennexandNishaEswaran.

Thoughts,opinions,commentsandqueriesarewelcomeand encouraged,andshouldbesentto: TheEditor, Geist letters@geist.com Snailmail: #210–111 WestHastingsStreet VancouverBC V6B1H4 Lettersmaybeeditedforclarity,brevityanddecorum.

HowieTsui (徐浩恩)worksinawiderangeofmedia.He employsastylizedformofdecisiveimagerytodisarmbroadeninghegemonicregimes.Hisworkhasbeenexhibitedat theArtGalleryofGreaterVictoria,BurrardArtsFoundation andelsewhere.HeisrepresentedbyPatelBrownandlives inVancouver,BC.Youcanfindhimathowietsui.com. Thebuttonsthroughoutthisissuearecourtesyof

AnnaBintaDiallo isamultidisciplinaryvisualartistwho investigatesmemoryandnostalgiatocreateunexpectednarrativessurroundingidentity.Herworkhasbeenexhibited acrosstheworldandsheistherecipientoftheBlackDesigners ofCanadaAwardofExcellence.ShelivesinWinnipeg,MB, onTreaty1Territory.Youcanfindheratannabintadiallo.com.

TheGeistFoundationreceivesassistancefrom privatedonors,theCanadaCouncil,theBC ArtsCouncil,theCityofVancouverandthe CulturalHumanResourcesCouncil.

Miscellany5

JamesPollock istheauthorof SailingtoBabylon (AbleMuse Press)and YouAreHere:EssaysontheArtofPoetryinCanada (ThePorcupine’sQuill).Hehasbeenafinalistforboththe GriffinPoetryPrizeandtheGovernorGeneral’sLiteraryAward forpoetry.Readmoreofhisworkatgeist.com.Pollocklives inMadison,WIandatjamespollock.org. NoemieLemasson worksatahomelessshelterforwomen withseverementalillnessesandsubstanceabusedisorders. Sheincorporatescollageartasaformofarttherapyforher clientstolearnhealthycopingskills.Herworkconsistsof analogandupcycledcollageart.ShelivesinNewYorkCity.

6Geist119Winter2021

thicknessoftheshell.Aseachyear passes,thepeculiaritiesofeverytangible thingsinglouder.

TheChinesecommunitywasgiven RossBayCemetery’s“LBlock,”to sharewithJapaneseandIndigenous communities.People’snameswere notputontheirgraves,onlyacruel nounandanumber.LBlocklayso closetotheshore(thiswasbeforea seawallwasbuilt)graveswouldbe washedawayinstorms,sotheChinese BenevolentAssociationboughtthe siteuptheroad.TheChinesecemeteryisoneofmyfavouriteplacesto visit.Noburialsareperformedhere anymore,buteveryoneisremembered.Iliketovisitthealtar,where peopleleaveorangesandotherofferings,sometimesacigarette.Todaythe onlyitemisanegg,halflostinthe altar’sshadows. WhenIboileggsformyson,Iboil themforages.Whatisitwith kidsandsoftyolks?SometimesI’llforgetandremembertheeggswhenthe water’snearlyboiledaway.Mymother forgotanegginthisway.Whensheleft

FlyingtheCoop

Youcan’tbreakeggswithoutmakinganomelette

Notes&Dispatches7

“I’llbebackinafewhours,”Itellmy teensonasIleavethehouse,“with eggs.”Heis6'1"andleanasaknife.He worksoutdaily,sofoureggsisnothing. IhadthoughtI’dpicksomeupata supermarket,butwhenIcallinatmy friend’s,fivehensarescratchingexuberantlyintheyardafterdaysofbeing coopedup—literally.Myfriendhands mefoureggsstraightfromthenestbox. Theeggsareremarkablydifferentone fromtheotherinsizeandcolourand

Image:“House”byNoemieLemasson.

IsabellaRoss’sinterestingaccomplishmentisusuallyexplainedawaybythe factshewasmarriedtoaScottish chieftraderfortheHudson’sBay Company.Buthediedyearsbefore sheboughttheland,offedbyappendicitiswhileshewaspregnantwith theirtenthchild.

NOTES&DISPATCHES

SaraCassidy

MyfriendandIdecidetowalkto whatiscalledtheChinesecemetery. Ontheway,wepassRossBayCemetery,namedforIsabellaRoss,aMétis womanfromnearWinnipegwhoin the1850sbecamebothBC’sfirst femaleandfirstIndigenous“registeredlandowner”(that’stheunassumingtermthatcityhistoriansuse).

IsabellaRoss’shundred-acreparcel facedwhatwenowcalltheSalishSea, andwassofilledwithwaterfowl— ducksandgeeseandgrebes,presumably—shenameditFowlBayFarm. Eventually,afterRosshadsoldoff parcelstostayfinanciallyafloat,the cityboughttheresttouseasacemetery,whereIsabellaisnowburied alongsideJamesDouglasandEmily CarrandBillyBarker.

herdesktogetacupoftea,thereit was,“alittlesphereofash.”Theother dayIsimilarlyforgotsomethingfora longtime.Thegreyinmyhairwas lookinglikepigeonfeathers,soI’d boughtsomehenna—thefakecommercialkind.Iwassupposedtorinseitafter twentyminutes,butbythetimeI remembered,twohourshadpassed.My hairisnowadarkmass,likeabadwig, thatrebuffslight.Myfriendsrespond indifferentways.Somedon’tnoticeat all.Othersnoticebutdon’tsayathing. Othersnoticeandsay“Wow,youdid yourhair.”Sometrytosaysomething nice,like“Itlooksprettygood!”One said,“Youcanre-colourit,youknow.” AndI’msureanotheronewouldgoeven further:“Whydon’tyoucomeoverand I’llhelpyoure-colourit?” ItremindsmeofapieceofadviceI oncegotaboutadvice.Iwassorting outatrickysituation—arelationship thatwasfiftypercentdeeplyjoyful andfiftypercentdeeplymiserable:do IstayordoIgo?Istartedasking friendswhatIshoulddo.Onesaidto me,“Considerwhichfriendsyou’re goingtoforadvice.Thatshouldtell yousomethingaboutwhatyouwant tohear.”Iloveadvice.Mysistersdo too—webegeachotherforadvice.It’s terriblymaligned,advice.Becauseof sexism.Womengiveadvice,mendispensewisdom.

—JamesPollock

Istudiedphilosophyatuniversity inthe1980sandneveroncestudieda woman.Iwasnevertaughtbya womaneither.OrbyanyBIPOC.All thesemenweregoingonaboutthis loftythingcalledthehumancondition,andIrememberthinking,Well, whateverthatis,itissomethingI’ll neverexperience.Thehumanconditionhadnothingtodowithme.Some daysifIthinkaboutittoolongIwant togetmytuitionback.Icanfeelthe billsbeingcountedintomyoutstretchedhand.

Andtothinkthere’dbeenHypatiaofAlexandria(murderedbyamob ofChristians!),SimonedeBeauvoir,

Nothingisbraver;darknessitselement, itsgearadiode,batteries,acase, aswitch,afocus,andatemperament suitedtodiscoveryintheface ofignorance.Itfindslostthings,keyholes, targets,andtheway,withphotonshurled atmystery.Itunderstandsitsroleis topropagatesomelightintotheworld.

IwishI’dlearnedaboutHannahArendt inmytwenties.IfIhad,I’msureI wouldhavebeenbraveralltheseyears. WhatI’mtryingtodonowistobeaware whenIcrosspathswithrepressionand dispossession,omissionsandlies,dismissalanddiminishment.Sometimes theevidenceisquick,inpassing,alittle blazeofsunbetweenleaves.Sometimes it’salotcloser,likeheatonaburn. SometimesIfindI’mtheonemaintainingthefire—inmyignorance,mylack ofquestioning,mylazycomforts.Ican worryaboutmyhair,beanointedwith myfriends’advice,pedalmybikealong theshorewitheggsinmypocket— havelovefortheworld—butnoneof thatmeansI’mnotonmyguard,ready andwillingtohearaboutpeople’spain andstrength. SaraCassidy’snovel Nevers wasafinalist forthe2020GovernorGeneral’sLiterary AwardinYoungPeople’sLiterature.She regularlypublishesshortpersonalessayson Instagram@sarascassidy.Findmoreofher workin Geist 89,96and98.

ina BrainPickings article.Inher essay“TheEggsSpeakUp,”Arendt warnsagainstfightingthebigevils withoutfightingthelittleones;they areallconnected.Shediscusseshow Stalingraduatedalonghisexpansivelyrepressivepath,fromrevolution,where“youcan’tmakean omelettewithoutbreakingafew eggs”—“eggs”beingpeople—to “youcan’tbreakeggswithout makinganomelette,”whererepressionisintegraltothepolitical machine. Arendtbelievedthe“antidote”to totalitarianismis“loveoftheworld,” asPopovaputsit,andwrotethat love’sgoalisthekindoffearlessness thatexistsinthenotionofeternal afterlife,wherepeoplearesafefrom dispossession.

8Geist119Winter2021

JoyceMitchellCook…Thatten yearsbeforeIwasborn,Hannah Arendthadwrittenabookcalled The HumanCondition!Arendtwasvery interestedintotalitarianism,and “identifiedastherootoftyrannythe actofmakingotherhumanbeings irrelevant,”asMariaPopovaputsit

FLASHLIGHT

Notes&Dispatches9

Inmyearlytwenties,Ireceivedmy firstpieceofvelvetart,ahideous, enormousstilllifeofabowloffruit, purchasedatValueVillagebyafriend asagaggiftformybirthday.Overthe nexttwodecadesI’veacquiredthree dozenvelvetpaintings,includinga “Velvis”thatIreligiouslylintbrush, anunsigned,slightlycrooked,crownof-thornsJesushaggledfromaWinnipegantiquesshop,andanarrow assemblageofblueflowersonblack velvet,withatypewritteninscription onpinkcardstock:“VIWaddington, Winnipeg.” Asearchrevealedtheartist asViolaClaraMarthaWaddington (1916–2003),whoseobituary referred tounspecified“creativetalents.”Ifeel objectempathyforthepaint-by-numberskitpaintingsmadebywomen artistslikeWaddington,afeelingas irrationalasmyaffectionfor unattributedvelvetpaintingsmadein assembly-linefactories.Irescuetheir velvetyfloralarrangements,consigned,astheunwantedcraftprojects ofamateursandhobbyists,toonline classifieds,cobwebbedattics,garage sales.Orworse,tolandfills.Itracethe originsofmyvelvethoardingtendenciestoafirethatguttedmyfamily homewhenIwastwelve.Ilearned thattheonlysafeattachmenttopossessionscomeswiththingsthatare cheap,laughable,easilyreplaced.

PhotographdatedMay1963.SandsHotelPhotographCollectionPH-00287. CourtesyoftheSpecialCollectionsandArchives,UniversityLibraries,UniversityofNevada,LasVegas.

DorothyFrancis,MayClarke,Joy Caros—whopaintedprolifically,pragmaticallyandobscurely,onvelvet.

ROBYNLUDWIG

In2018,Ipurchased,through Kijiji,avelvetportraitofanelderly Asianman,signed“MinSjolseth” [sic]andentitled“SommyBing.”I discoveredthatMinnSjolseth-Carter (1919–1995)wasaNorwegian-born artistwhosettledinVancouverin 1957andopenedtheMinn-Tonge gallery, downtownonPenderStreet. Theresheproducedoil-on-black-velvet portraitsofAsianandPolynesianmen, womenandchildren,insufficient quantitiestostillappearregularlyon auctionsites.Igotintouchwithher daughter,thevisualartistLailaCampbell,whostatedbluntlyinanemail, “Somehowtheseworkswereverypopularthen.”Sjolseth-Carterclosedthe galleryin1967,quittingvelvetand committingherselfexclusivelyto othermedia.Afterherdeath,muchof hersubstantialbodyofworkwas accessionedbymuseumsandgalleries, butnotoneofhervelvets.

JoyCarospaintsaportraitofSpencerTracy,whoappearedinthefilm It’saMad,Mad, Mad,MadWorld.

BlackVelvet,IfYouPlease Thesecretisinthevelvet

hephrase“velvetpainting”brings tomindcryingclownsandsoftcore tropicalnudes,stackedunceremoniouslyinthriftshopsorfleamarkets. Amongtheseyou’reunlikelytofinda valuableEdgarLeeteg,theonlyvelvet artisttoachieveanydegreeofname recognition;butyoumayhappenupon aneglectedgembyoneoffourCanadianwomen—MinnSjolseth-Carter,

produceworkthatwouldsell.”Five yearsafterherdeath,Francisremains onlyknownforherwatercolours,pastelsandacrylicsonpaperandcanvas.

Caroscameacrossasdismissiveof hervelvetwork,butfiercelyproudof hertechnique.Abletoproduceone paintingaweek,Caroswouldstretch velvetoverhardboard,sketchan

10Geist119Winter2021

It’sGod’sdayoffandminetoo. Therearetentsoneveryblockandbackalleynow. AsIwalkdownsidewalksclearedbyrain togetacoffeeandnewspaper, Icomplaintomyselfaboutthepriceofthepaper. ButIneedthatcrossword. MaybethistimeIwillfinishit,althoughIneverdo. InfrontoftheOvaltinerestaurant,a51/2footwoman inadrenchedgreyhoodieweavesandflails throughHastingsStreettraffic likeascarecrowinthewind. Hornsblareather“Idon’tgiveashit”smile. HenryDoylehasbeenworkingasacustodianandmaintenanceworkerinsheltersandSROs ontheDowntownEastsideofVancouversince2008.Henowworksinthebiggestshelterin NorthAmerica.AnvilPresspublishedhisdebutcollection, NoShelter,in2021.

CarosleftCanadaandspentmore thanthirtyyearsinItaly.Abroadshe marketedhertrademarkvelvet iconography:waterandteardroplets onPolynesianwomenandchildren. Shecontinuedtopursuesalesthrough exhibitsathotelsinEuropeand NorthAmerica.Inthelate1990s,she leftbehindvelvetasacanvas.Family portraitscommissionedbythevisually impairedsingerAndreaBocelliwere herlastvelvetworks.

SundayMorningSidewalk

InlateMarch2020,unemployedand boredasaresultofthepandemic,I decidedtotrackdownJoyCaros (b.1932),theindisputablequeenofvelvetpainting.Caroscameacrossthe phonelineasformidable.Withlittlesentimentalityshedescribedherearly yearsasanartistinVancouver. She experimentedfirstwithdifficult-tohandle chalkonvelvet.Shepliedher tradepaintingportraitsfortouristsin StanleyPark,andforcustomersat TraderVic’sPolynesian-themedrestaurantinCoalHarbour.Vancouver’s Jewish communityprovidedherastable sourceoflucrativecommissions throughoutthe1950s.Whatchanged thecourseofhercareerwasatourof Hawaii,andaninvitationtovisitthe galleryoftheartdealerBarneyDavis. DavisrepresentedLeeteg,whomhemarketedasthe“GauguinofAmericanvelvetpainting.”HehiredCarosto surreptitiouslyretouchLeetegpaintingsforsale.AlsoinHawaii,while exhibitinghervelvetsattheHilton HawaiianVillagehotel,Caroshada chancemeetingwiththedirectorStanleyKramer.Hecommissionedadozen portraitsofthecastofhis1963film It’s aMad,Mad,Mad,MadWorld, flyingher outtoHollywood. Backhomein1964,Carospainted theBeatlesonvelvet.Sheofferedthe paintingtothelocalDJRedRobinson inexchangeforfront-rowseatstothe Beatles’onlyconcertinVancouver. Laterthatyear,Carostookhervelvet paintingsonacross-countrytourof theCanadianPacificRailwaygrand hotelsandsoldoutbythetimesheleft TorontoforMontreal.

Duringourconversation,Caros saidEuropeansrespectvelvetmore thanAmericansdo.Shelamented “commercialjunk”reproductionsand forgeriesthatdevaluedherwork,and shespokewithexasperationabout effortstodefendthecopyrighttoher images.Yetshealsotalkedanimatedly aboutlicensingherworkforpillowcasesandcandywrappers.Shestated, “Idon’tmissvelvet.Thereisno marketforit.Idon’tthinkaboutit.”

HENRYDOYLE

InMarch2020IspottedaDorothy Francis(1923–2016)paintingon CraigslistanddroveouttoNew Westminstertomeettheowner.I parkedillegallyinthecul-de-sacofa high-risecondodevelopment.Wearingsurgicalglovesandaclothmask,I handedtwenty-fivedollarstoanolder gentleman,whoworeamaskbutno gloves.Hehandedmea20" x27" portraitofanelderlyAsianmanbrushed intosoftbrownvelvet,anoffensively hackneyedpiecethatIwasboth excitedandashamedtogetmyhands on.Thesellerseemedrelievedthat thepaintinghadfoundanappreciative buyer.Athome,IemailedFrancis’s son,thevisualartistTimFrancis,who wrote,“Partofmom’smotivationto paintonvelvetwasdoingportraits becauseshethoughttheycouldbe compelling.Theotherpartwaslikely financial.WithfiveyoungchildrenI knowmyfatherpushedherto

Notes&Dispatches11 outlinewithchalkorpastelanddrybrushoilpaintwithpig-hairbrushes. Atechnique,sheboasted,“fewartists canmanage.”SheregaledhowavisitortooneofhershowsinItaly snippedoffapieceofthevelvet, believingthat“thesecretwasinthe velvet.”

InApril2020,Istumbleduponthe workofthevelvetartistMayClarke (dateofbirthanddeathunknown)of Ontario.AslightbiographyontheHistoricalPeelArtistswebsitesaidthat Clarkebecamea“professionalartist” in1964dueto“publicdemand”forher oilsonblackvelvetandthat“asfastas shecompletedapictureonvelvet,a buyerwouldpurchaseitfromher.”Iwas abletolocateoneoriginalMayClarke, acquiredbyawomaninOntariofrom athriftstore:aportraitofasultry,exoticizedwoman,withablankexpression, hoodedinlace.Itwasatechnicallycompetent,ifunoriginal,compositionthat evokedtheuncannyvalley,asunnerving asthebigeyesofaMargaretKeane painting,whoseworkrecentlyexperiencedaresurgenceafterTimBurton madeabiopicabouthercalled BigEyes Evenafansuchasmyselfhastoacknowledgevelvetpaintingsasaestheticallydisturbingandproblematicasartifactsof appropriationandcringeworthystereotypes.

Sheturnedtheedgesofthefabric, revealingapatterneddesignthatcan helpdifferentiateauthenticfromfake.

Ash TERENCEBYRNES

AsIlisten, itseemsIshouldbeabletostepout andwalkonthethicksummerair acrossAshbelow tosilentlyenterhisflat, whereIimagineseeing: anodalisqueonblackvelvet asinkrimmedwithamberrust carpartsdegreasinginacoffeecan thecarcassofablindtelevision thecurlingpagesoflastyear’scalendar.

Idon’tknow.Perhapsthatisunfair. Perhapshisflat,likemine, isspareandairy, decoratedwithhisdaughter’sawards forfilmsonclimatechange,refugees, theforthcomingvaccine, hisradioalwaystunedtoCBCOne, ashelistensandwaits asIlistenandwait fornewsoftheannihilatingfire.

Afewweeksafterourphoneinterview,Iacceptedaninvitationtomeet withCaros,whoisinhereighties,ather NewWestminsterapartment.Thewalls weredecoratedsalon-stylewithheroilon-canvaspaintings.Sheshowedme someofthevelvetsinherprivatecollection,unframedforstorage.Thefabric,a blackrayoncottonvelvet,withupright hairsthatdonotflattenwhenpressed withpaint,shesaid,camefromawholesalerinNewYork.

TerenceByrnesisaMontréalwriterandphotographer.Seemoreofhisworkatterencebyrnes.com andgeist.com.

Shethenheldtheloosefabricupto thelight.WithatrueCarospainting,

Theoldmanonthebalcony acrossAsh keepswatchoverourstreet, whosebriefname spellsoutthepowderyendofthings. Thepublicairtransmits hisdayswirelessly tomyopenwindow: theundisciplinedbarkofhisphonealarm theradio’sdiffusionofweatherandsports theentreatiesofgrey-suitedheraldsofGod thegreetingtoanindifferentneighbour thewetchokeofhiscough thefoldingofhisemptychair thesighingexhaustionofday’send.

12Geist119Winter2021

Askanybody, Isuggest. Anybody? Ithreatenmy heroes,butthey’reonlyidolthreats.I makeapointoflisting,forposterityas muchasanything,andtoboosttheword count,afewofmyfavouritewords: jazzercise, gumption, boxercise, lobsterine, tootle.Myinfluencesareobviousto anyonewho’sbeenpayingattention, butwhataboutmyinfluencers?Ithrow inaninvoice,justtofuckwithpeople, whichistosay,Iguess,thepowersthat be.Iletthisbeawarning.Don’tread thecomments,Icomment.Andask: areyounotentertained?Idiscuss money-backguarantees,theideaofthem aswellastheirhistory,whichissurprising,ifyouboredown,thephilosophy, thewholequestionofaworldwithout risks,isthatreallyonewe’dbehappy inhabiting?ThemoralofthestoryI hintatwithoutgettingintospecifics. Igooutonalimb,whereIperforma littlepirouette. Justwatchme,I demand,withallduerespectifnotso muchasaby-your-leavetoPierre Trudeau,whichIguessissortofan homageinitsownright?Wehardly knewye,Isay,orinsinuate.Thankyou, thankyou,Ibleat,soverykind,sheddingmoretears,asneeze,bowing slightlyatthewaist,stretchingthose hamstrings,backingupslowlywhile sweepingahandoutinafinalflourish, stopthepresses,theshowmustgoon, seeyounexttime, don’ttellmewhatthe poetsaredoing,ohTokyo,Inevercansleep inyourarms. StephenSmithhaswrittenforthe West EndPhoenix, CanadianGeographic, Outside and TheNewYorkTimes.He livesinTorontoandatpuckstruck.com. sheexplained,youcan“seethelight through.”Sheaddedwithglee,“You couldrunitthroughthewashing machine!”IaskedifsheknewDorothy, MinnorMay.Carosansweredwitha defiant,“Nobodycancopyme.Joy Carosandthat’sall.”BeforeIleft, Carosexpressedhopethataretrospectiveexhibitioncouldbeheldforher beforeshepasses.

InSeptember2020,Ichattedwith CarenAnderson,formerco-ownerof theVelveteriaMuseuminLosAngeles,whichshutteredin2019.Shetold meabouttheself-taughtAmerican velvetpainterCecelia“CeCe”Rodriguez, stillpaintinginLasVegasattheageof 101,thoughnolongeronvelvet. Andersonlamentedthatvelvetpaintingwas“anotherthingmenhad claimedforthemselves.”Ithinkabout womenlikeRodriguez,Caros,Clarke, Sjolseth-Carter,Francis,whosenames andworkareinvisibleto“highart” critics,curatorsandcollectors,evento thosewhochampionoutsiderand kitschart.Womenwhosework stampedafemalegazeontothe ubiquitousexoticizedbodiesof velvet painting.Iworryforthefew remainingelderstateswomenofvelvet painting,likeCarosandRodriguez.I lookforwardtocelebratingtheendof thepandemicwithasicklysweetcocktailattheWaldorfHotelinVancouver,thewallsofitshistoricTikiBar adornedwithLeetegs.Iexaminesuspiciouslyan“original”JoyCaros paintingoneBay,onsaleforthebargainof$750,andIwouldlovetohold ituptothelight.

Anyresemblancestopersonslivingordeadarepurelyvindictive I

ntheAcknowledgementsIcoptovarious,well,notexactlycrimes,let’s callthem trespasses:forgiveme.Ido somerepenting,too,runafewretractionsuptheproverbialflagpole,the oddrefutation.IfImakesomepromises (andIdo),it’sontheunderstanding thatnobodyisactuallykeepingtrack ofwhatgetsfollowedthroughon,let alonewhatdoesn’t.BeforeIgetaround tothankinganyone,Isaymysorries, myfarewells.Anyresemblancestopersonslivingordead,Idisclaim,are purelyvindictive.Inbiddingmyadieus, Igetsomejabsin,andanuppercut.My lowblowsgolowerthanintended,and therebymostlymissthemark.My tearsarecrocodile.Myscores,Isettle. ThelyricsIquotewithoutnecessarily meaningtobelongmostlytoBruce Cockburn,soshout-outtohim.The parableIincludegetsalittlegarbled, thenalittleteary,it’stheonewiththe fishesortheloavesthatare…lost?I getintoawholethingaboutwhether isthereawordforagarbledparable —agarbable? Letmebethefirsttoadmit thatI’veneverbeenonetoaskpermission, Iwrite, pleasewouldyouallowmethat? ThelittleprayerIattempttakesaturn fortheworse,thenanother,and another. Youareaheadbyacentury,Ireiterate,andmeanit.Theitalicsaremine, Imakeclear,despitewhatyoumay haveheard.Joking:ImeanGord Downie,ofcourse,nodisrespectto Bruce,infact,kudostohim.Myqualms arealsocrocodile,ifthat’sathing.Is it?Crocodilequalms?Theimmunity I’mseekingnolawyerhas,sofar,been abletodraftinawaythat’sgoingto holdupincourt.Inamemymuseand mynemesis,butnotmyfriendLyle,who neverlikedthelimelight.

RobynLudwigisascriptsupervisorinthe BCfilmandtelevisionindustry.Sheholds aMasterofFilmandLiteraturefromthe UniversityofYork,UK.Herwritinghas beenpublishedinthe ColumbiaJournal, CartoonResearch, SilentLondon and VancouverObserver.

STEPHENSMITH

TheAcknowledgements

LisaBird-WilsonisaMétisandnêhiyawwriter. Herworkhasappearedinmanyanthologiesand journalsinCanada.Herfirstnovel, Probably Ruby,waspublishedinthesummerof2021by DoubledayCanada.ShelivesinSaskatoon.Find moreofherworkatlisabirdwilson.comandatgeist.com.

From SaskatchewanBook,abookofphotosbyGeorgeWebber,withtextbyLornaCrozier.PublishedbyRocky MountainBooksin2020. SaskatchewanBook containstwohundredphotosofprairielandscapesandruralstructures takenbyWebberoveraspanofthirtyyears.Thephotosaboveweretakenin2018inSaskatchewan.Thephoto

WhenIwasinthemidstofworkingonmy2016 poetrycollection, TheRedFiles (NightwoodEditions),whichreflectsonthelegacyoftheresidentialschoolsystem—itsimpactsonfamiliesand

histories—Ihadaconversationovercasualdrinks withfriendsoffriends,peopleIdidn’tknow.The topicarosethatIwasawriter(noneofthemwere).

EthicalRemembering

AskedwhatIwasworkingon,Ireplied, “Acollectionofpoetry.” “Aboutwhat?”

14Geist119Winter2021 FINDINGS

Quill&Quire.

“Well,”Ihesitated.“Myprocesshasbeento examineresidentialschoolphotosandother archivalsourcesandcreatepoemsfromthatexperience.”Wewereinthedimamberlightingofa pub—thekindthatputsyouinarelaxedmoodand letsyouloweryourdefencesoveracoupleof beers,enjoyafewlaughsandsomelighthearted conversation.Isensedthequestion,andmore specificallymyresponse,threatenedtoalterthe mood.ButIdidn’tyethaveoneansweraboutmy residentialschoolpoetryforthosewhodonot

LISABIRD-WILSON

FromtheJuly/August2021issueof

Butwhatthatdismissiveresponsealsomisses, moreimportantly,isanappreciationthatthehistoryofourfamiliesandcommunitiesisfullof

GeorgeWebber’sphotographshavebeenpublishedin

CanadianGeographic, TheNewYorkTimes and Geist HelivesinCalgary. knoworthinkaboutcolonialhistoryandits impactsonIndigenouslives,andanotherfor peoplewhogetitandareonthesamepage.Inthat moment,Isimplyansweredaquestionaboutmy work—workthatwasencompassingandconsumingandthoughtfulanddeep—asifwewereall comingfromsimilarunderstandingsaboutthe world.IsoonrealizedIshouldhavemoreconsciouslythoughtaboutthefactthatIwastheonly Indigenouspersonatthetable.But,likeImentioned,mydefencesweredown.

waswritingpoetryaboutexcrementinsteadofabout people,familymembers,andancestors.

Findings15 ontheleftwastakennearthejunctionofHighways18and19andthephotoontherightwastakeninLemsford.

Inreactiontomyansweraboutexaminingresidentialschoolphotosanddocuments,oneofthe individualsblurtedout,“Whatfor?”withaforcethat wasnearlyphysical,inatonefilledwithrevulsion andhorror.Theyseemedtrulybewilderedastowhy Iwouldwanttolooksocloselyatsuchathing.AsifI

I’vedissectedthatresponseovertime,yearsin fact,andconcludedthatitwasbasedonanonIndigenousinterpretationofresidentialschool history,onethatcategorizesitasuglyandrepulsive—toohorribletolookat.Butthatresponse glossesoverthefactthatit’sonlythoseinaprivilegedpositionwhogettochoose.Lookingawayis notanoptionforIndigenouspeople—it’snotfor ustochoosetolookawayfromourfamilies,relatives,ancestors;fromacolonialhistorywedidn’t askforordeserve;fromourownbloodmemory. Wecannotsimplyoptout.

HowcouldIevenhopetomakethosemonias peopleseethechildrenIsawinthephotosfrom mygrandparents’community?Thelittleboys, particularlyinonephoto,laughingatsomething, thecameraclickingatexactlytherightmoment, andhowIlatchedontotheirobviousjoyasifmy lifedependedonit.Iwantedthoseboystohave thatmorethananything—tohavejoyandlaughter.Thatwasmywishforthechildrenofthat school.IfresidentialschoolsstrippedawayIndigenouschildren’shumanity,deprivedthemofthe lovethatanychilddeserves,thenIwantedtooffer loveandcompassiontotheminmywordsandmy depictions;ifIcouldhavehuggedthem,Iwould have—theirchildspirits,theirinnocence.Iwrote asmuchwithmyheartasmyhead.Moreeven.

FamilyJustice

MaybewhatIwasexperiencingwaspartofan ethicalremembering.Acollectiveethicofbloodmemory-lovewherewerelyononeanother,exist inrelationshiptooneanother—us,inthehereand nowandthevariousgenerationsbackasfarasI cantrace—inordertocreateandrecreateand, ultimately,loveourselves.WhatImeantosayis:I donotexistwithoutthem—biologically,yes,but alsospiritually,asIamcreatedandrecreated repeatedlybytheactofknowingthem.Likewise, theircontinuedexistenceisreliantuponmycreativeworkbringingthemtolifeagainandagainas imaginedsubjects.AndIwillpassthisimaginative giftalongtomychildren,andtheytotheirs.In thisiterativeprocess,wecomposeoneanother acrossgenerationsandtime.

Thiscircularbuildingofidentity,thisimaginativework,ismyresponsetothequestion,“What for?”The215children’sgravesdiscoveredinMay atthesiteoftheformerKamloopsIndianResidentialSchoolopensthewoundagainforthose innocentvictims—notthefirstandnotthelast. Myresponseistorepeat:Iloveyou,Iseeyou,I holdyou.Idon’tknowwhatelsetodoaswegrieve ourchildren,ourancestors,ourbloodmemory, ourselves.

From TheErratics.ReissuedbyKnopfDoubleday, adivisionofPenguinRandomHouseCanadaLimited,in2020.Reproducedbyarrangementwith thepublisher.Allrightsreserved.Originallypublished byFinchPublishingin2018.VickiLaveau-Harvie wasborninCanadaandnowlivesinAustralia.

TheErratics isamemoiraboutherreturntoher hometowninAlberta.ItwontheFinchMemoir Prizein2018andtheStellaPrizein2019.

Forthechildren,forthefuture,forthepast; that’swhatfor. ��

16Geist119Winter2021

VICKILAVEAU-HARVIE

love.WhatIcouldn’texplaininthatbar,inits warmamberlightoveraglassofbeer,waswhat washappeningtomeasIwrotethosepoems— whatIwasinthemiddleofexperiencing.The waysIwaslearningtobecognizant,daily,oftenderness.ThewaysIconnectedandreconnected withmyrelatives,myancestors,asIreadand observedandcirculatedtheirstoriesandtheir images—theiressences—throughmymentaland physicalbeing.HowIwastransformed,repeatedly,bytheexperience.ThewaysIwasmindful ofcare—thenewresonancethewordcare-ful heldforme.And,mostofall,howIwaslearning toapproachtheworkwithlove.

Myparentsliveinparadise,twentyacreswitharanch houseonarise,nothingbetweenyouandthesky andthedistantmountains.Overlappingcedarshinglesontheroofthatwilllastforgenerationsoruntil thehousefallsdown. Nonearneighbors. ThehouseisparadiseinthesamewaytheHotel Californiais:afortresswithmanybedrooms,awine cellar,amudroom,ahugewindowlesslibrary,a grandpianointhegreatroom,twofurnaces,anda bombshelterdugfivemetersdeepintothehillin caseCubanmissilesareeveraimedattheTurner ValleyoilfieldsorthetroutinSheepCreek. Thedoorsofthishouseopentonoone.The phoneringsunanswered,unheardbymyfather, whofindshislifelivableifhetakesthebatteries outofhishearingaid,andignoredbymymother, whoknowstheworldisouttogether.Theleaves ofthetremblingaspenscanshakealldaylike goldcoinsinairasclearascider,butthisisnota welcomingplace.

Wearenomatchforanyofthose,suchasweare: twowomenwellpastanysemblanceofbloom,often mistakenfortwinsinsupermarketsandgasstations, whichpissesofftheyoungerofthetwo,andashaking,shamblingoldmanwhoisnot,asIfirstfeared, terminallystricken.Itissimplerthanthat.Hehas beenstarvingforsometimeandsuffers,likePatty Hearstbeforehim,fromStockholmsyndrome.

Inthekitchen,mymother’shipbonecrumbles andbreaksandshefalls. Theymusthavephonedsomeone.Theymust haveopenedthedoortostrangerswhocameto help.Thesestrangerswillhavewalkedintothis time-capsulehousesealedagainsttheoutside worldforadecade.Thebreachingoftheno-go zonemusthavemadeasoundlikeacrowbarsplinteringwood.

Theyear’sworkisdoneontheland,andthe wardsonthefloorbelowmymother’sarefullof farmersandranchersunderobservationfora vagueandundefinablemalaise.It’sthesameevery year.Iblamethelandscape,outtherepininglikea suitorlessspinsterforthesnow,fortheblinding swatheofwhitethatwillmaskitsdisgraceand wrapitinbeautyuntilthespringwhen,againstall odds,bountifulthingswillpiercetheearth,grow andflower.

So,earlywinterinthehouseamilefromthe six-lanehighwayrunningstraightsouthtothe States.OnthisdayasolidribbonofeighteenwheelersisgunningitfullthrottleforGreatFalls, Montana,orBoise,Idaho,makingthemostofthe openroadsandhardlybelievingtheirluck,justa driftofpowderacrosstheroadwhenyougearup, likeicingsugarfromadoughnut.

Vancouver’sChinatownlionsdefaced withanti-AsianCOVID… New“premiumcasual”plant-based restaurantmovinginto…

Findings17

In ColdBlood?Thesesparselypopulatedspaceswhere thebuffalonolongerroamdrawsociopaths,people withgunsandopportunisticlocalcrackheads.

broachingthesubjectofmymother,herfractiousnesswhichisdisruptinghospitalroutine,herdicey rehabprospects,andhereventualdischarge.

“VANCOUVERCHINATOWN”MAY31,2020 From OneandHalfofYou byLeanneDunic.Publishedby Talonbooksin2021.LeanneDunicistheauthorof ToLove theComingEnd (Book*hug)and TheGift (Book*hug).She livesontheuncededandoccupiedTraditionalTerritoriesofthe xʷməθkʷəyəm,Sḵwxwú7mesh and səlililwətaʔɬ peoples.Find heratleannedunic.com.

Idon’tcareeitherway.Ijustwishshewouldn’t sleepwithherwindowwideopen.Hasn’tsheread

Atmyparents’house,whereIstaywithmy sister,mystick-figureskin-and-bonesfathercreeps alongthehallwayatnighttoturnthethermostats uponthefurnaces.Mysistersighsandmuttersas sheturnsthemdownandslamsthedoortoher bedroom.

Anti-AsianhatecrimesinVancouver notwhatveteransfought… CatstuckonSkyTrainplatformfound safeandsound,thanks…

Anotherraciallychargedattackin Vancouver’sChinatown RacistgraffitiscrawledonChinatown lionsinVancouver ForChinatownSeniors,Survival MeansStayinginTouch Chinatownbusinessesincity-owned malldesperateforrent… Chinatownperformanceaimsto bringhealingafterracist… COVID-19:Seriesofanti-Asian assaultsandvandalism… VPDreporta625%increaseinantiAsiancrimeinvestigations…

Somedayslater,atthehospital,Ipropmyself upinamidbluetubchairinthesocialworker’s room.Outsidetheskyiscolorless,thelandscape dunanddry,awastelandwaitingforsnow.

Oratleastmyvis-à-visistryingtobroach.Iam gamelytryingtopretendthatIdonotseeherflippingthroughtheindexpagesofthe FamilyJustice andEquityHandbook inhermind,lookingforan

SoIsitinmytubchairfacingtheyoungsocial workerdispatchedtogetabeadonus,andweare

Theydon’tcareaboutcrazy,Isay.It’snotabout crazy.She’sinthereforhiprehabandshe’sgiving themalotoftrouble.Theyjustwanttomakesure thatwearereadyforhertobedischargedassoon astheycandecentlydoit.

18Geist119Winter2021

Extreme?Isay.Mercurial?Challenging,yes. Quiteavibrantpersonality,mymother. Tobeblunt,shesays,yourmothercanbe difficult. So.They’venoticed. I’mreadyforthis.Ihaverehearsedwithmy sisterforthis.Ihavehadto,becausehereiswhat happenedyesterday. Suppertime,yesterdayevening.Mysisteris carvingachickenfordinnerwhenthephonerings. Shespeaksonthephoneforsomeminutes,carvingknifeinhand,thenshehangsupand announcesthattheywanttoseeusatthehospital totalkaboutmymother,inparticularaboutsomethingtheycallherdifficultyadjusting.Mysister lookstotheceilingandbeginstoexultlikeatrue believergivingpraise.

Watchwhatyouwishfor,Iwarnher.Wedon’t wantthemtobelieveshe’salwaysbeencrazy.If theybelievethat,wecan’tmakeacaseforkeeping herconfinedfromnowon,somewherewhereshe can’tkillDadbyincrements.

Finally,shecries.Somebodywillfinallybelieve us!Theycanseehowcrazysheis.They’llbelieve usnow.Sheskewersacoupleofoldnonbelievers fromourchildhoodonhercarvingknifeonthe waybacktothestove.

ByJuliaMorrison.From PrismInternational,Summer1960,Volume1:4.JuliaMorrisonreceivedanMAfromtheUniversityofIowa.

Ilookbalefullyather.Imean,shesays,witha motherso…Hervoicediesout.Shelookstothelandscapeforhelp.Iwanttogetthisoverwith.Ihelp.

Orinonego,Iadd,thinkingoftherifleinits chamoiscoverproppedinthecornerofthestudy downstairs.

LADYWRESTLERDOWNEDAT43

We’llneedthemtobelieveinaslightlymodified metaphor:anunstableslopethathasrecentlygiven way:aslippagelikeFrankSlideintheRockiesthat

�� appropriateheading.Mymotherhastoldherthat mysisterandIdisappeareddecadesagoandthat theinvestigatorsshehiredonseveralcontinents foundnotraceofus.Butnow,somehowsensing herfrailty,smellingdeathandmoney,wehave comeintolandfeet-first,likevulturesinawestern,wantingtoputheraway. Thelastbitistrue. Theyoungwomaneyesmecautiously.Itmust havebeenhardwhenyouweregrowingup,she begins.

Herpoemshaveappearedin NewWorldWriting, Homageto Baudelaire, Accent and Poetry Andshewasstrong. Hermusclesweretheenvyofoldtrees; Thoseeyeswerecoinswhichcouldbuyoutthemoon. Herdinnerswereapparentonherface Forsheneverleftabitetofeed Whatevercrawlsaboutwhilewe’reasleep, Yethertablewasakingdomofdebris: String,comb,spools—toystopleaseacat. Andshetookupherlifeatforty-three. Perfume,shoesandscarvesgrewonherfloors— Exoticflowerslackingseriouspots. Assheplayedwellwithlife,itplayedwithher: Eyesandmuscles,fearfulofthefloor, Confuseditwithatableorthedoor; Shehadherbeddingfastenedtothewall. Herprogresswasthematterofarule Learnedasinvented.Sheinventedwell, Andtherewasnolackofteaching: Whoknewwhatrulemightmaketomorrow’sgrace? Thenhereyesgrewcool,hermusclestwitched. Nowordwassaidwhen,fitfulforthedoor, Herstrongestsecretturneduponthefloor.

InaflashIseeoursituationclearly.It’slikea splitscreen,atwo-partproblemmysisterandI havenotspokenaboutincleartermsinthehours sincewearrivedhere.

Mymotheris,byvirtueofacrumblingbone,an osteoporotichip,confinedexactlywhereweneed hertobe:inahospital,foranextendedperiodof time,awayfrommyfather.Ifwe’resmartenough, we’llusetherespitethisbrokenboneaffordsusto makesureshenevercomeshomeatall,thatshe willremainconfined,notforherhipbutfora completelydifferentreason,andthatmyfather willhaveroomtorecoverfromherregimenof starvationandbrainwashing.

From SplitTooth.PublishedbyVikingCanada, adivisionofPenguinRandomHouseCanadaLimited,in2018.Reproducedbyarrangementwiththe publisher.Allrightsreserved.TanyaTagaqisan award-winningsinger,composerandauthor. Split Tooth wasshortlistedfortheScotiabankGiller Prizein2018.Youcanfindherattanyatagaq.com. It’sadustysummernightintheHighArctic.The sunisshiningbrightlyoverhead.Thesunalways bringslifeandmischief,serenityandvisions.It’stwo o’clockinthemorningandI’veshruggedoffmy curfew.TherewillbehelltopaywhenIgethome andmyfather’sthunderousfootstepsshakethehouse withablazingirethatonlyhecanconjure.

Findings19 killedscores;asuddencascadingdeterioration, maybeduringtheanestheticforherhip.Itcouldbe true.Ithappens.Weneedhernottocomehome becauseshewillperishinthishouseandso willherhusband,soshemustbeseen unabletocopenow,notashavingalways beenthatway. Thisupsetsmysister.Shewants validation,vindication.Shewantsitto beaboutcrazy.Shewantstopaint“I toldyouso”onthewallsofthehospital, inblood.Shehasacase,butshecanonly indulgeherselfatacostIamnotwillingtopay.I knowIamright. Iwin.Withbadgrace,sherehearseswithme afterdinner.Westand,likeairlinehostesses,feet

together.Here,Isay,isyournormalrangeofpersonalitytraits.Iholdmyhandsafootpart,waist height,palmsfacing,asthoughpressingonthe endsofawholemealsandwichloaf. Andthis,Isay,spreadingmyarms wideasthoughindicatinganexitonthe right,wewish,andanexitontheleft, ifonly,ismymother’srange.Tendency toextremes,challengingforloved ones.“Loved”inquotationmarks. Andnow,justrecently,thisunfortunateslippage,whichhaspushedherbeyond anyparametersourarmscanencompass.Eyes down,palmsup,helpless. Thatiswhatwewillsay. Repeatafterme. ��

It’sworthittodisobeyandjoinmybrethrenin ourcelebrationoffreedom,electricity,andcuriosity.Fingertipsanxiousandknockkneesoscillating, weconjureandconspire;weharnessdesiresand swatawaydoubt.Thewinterwaslongandoppressive.Weallknewthatsoonwewouldbeinour teenagedyearsandthistimewasprecious.Allchildrenonthecuspofpubertyseemtounderstand thatthismagictimewillendsoon.Greetingthe

futureandyearningformaturityandyetplanted firmlyinthemoon.Revellinginouryouth,wishingitwouldneverend.Neverseeingpastthetips ofournosesaswearedriventhroughourbodies withtheperfectlightningstrikeofgrowingcells andperceivedimmortality.Wetranscendtimeand plucksmilesoffeachother’sfaces.Diggigglesout ofribcagesandshootinsultsasiftheywere compliments.

Thereisasirenthatsoundsinoursmalltown toannouncethecurfew.Atnoonandat10p.m. Everytimethesirensoundsallthesleddogshowl, andIimaginethattheythinkthereisalarge,loud goddogthatrulesthelandhowling.Iequatethis withreligion.Ashort-sightedanddesperate attemptforhumanstocreatereasonandorderin auniversewecan’tpossiblycomprehend.The simpletruthiswearesimplyanexpressionofthe energyofthesun.Wearethegloriousmanifestationofpoweroftheuniverse.Wearethefingertipsoftheforcethatdrivesthestars,sodoyour jobandFEEL. Ourblack-hairedhumanpackhasdecidedto hangoutbythestepsbehindtheschool.Our gnashingteethandgumshungryforactivity, tonguesgeneratingconflictandimaginaryrealities wherewewereinterestingandrelevant,notjust kidsontheschoolsteps.Notpartofaboringold townoftwelvehundredsouls(ifyouonlycount thehumans,butwhoeversaidonlyhumanscan

Bravado TANYATAGAQ

20Geist119Winter2021

Zoom(Electronicresource)

AsianAmericanJews Indigenouslegislators

Neurodiversity Selfemployedpeoplewithdisabilities

Journalisticerrors Thoughtinsertion Penetrationtesting(Computernetworks)

AselectionofnewsubjectheadingsattheVancouverPublicLibrary, createdbetweenFebruaryandOctober,2021. Computeranxiety Minoritywomenactivists Noncitizens(replacing:Aliens)

AllIhadwasmyspeedandagility.Alastheboys havejustrecentlygottenfaster,stronger,andtaller thanIanditbreaksmebecauseIusedtobethe best.Myegoisinastateofflux.Iampowerless nowandhavelostmyflagpoleinoursocialsetting. Iwasthefastest.It’satoughpilltoswallowfora tomboy.Imissbeingabletobeattheboys.Iused tobeaball-kicker.Theoneboyhangingoutwith usthiseveningisalittleyoungerthantherestof us;cocksure,andsmallforhisage.Hisskinisdark brownandhiseyessoblack.Ilovethewayhishair issoblackthatitshinesblueinthesun.Heisso verycute,yethisvoicehasnotcrackedyet,his ballshaven’tdropped.Thegirlswanttoholdhim likeadoll.Buthe’sadick,thewayonlyinsecure peoplecanbeadick.Heannoysmeinalotof ways,butnothingneedlesmemorethantheway hemakesfunofmeforhavingacrushonmy friend.Shedoesn’tknowit,sotheboy’sadolescent judgmentleavesmeembitteredandconfrontational.I’vealwayslovedgirls,andourinsufferable townseesthisloveasdeviance.Thislittleshithead isnothelping. Wearepickingupstaleoldcigarettebuttsand smokingthelastpuffsoffthem,burningourlips andfingersontheindignityofitall.Thereare alwaysplentyofbuttsaroundtheBayortheCoop,butwehaveexhaustedthesupplytonight.The highschoolkidsusuallysmokearoundtheseback steps,sowefindsomegoodlongonesbecausethe kidshavetothrowthemawaywhentheteachers trytosneakupandcatchthemred-handed. Thelittleboyisinatauntingmood.Heisyappingabouthowboysarejustbetterthangirls. Boysarestronger,boysarefaster,andboysare smarter.Faggotsaredisgustingandhehatesthem. Helookslikeamosquitotome.Ihaveanidea.I jumpdownfrommyperchontherailingandgrab himfrombehind.Heissoslight.Iwrestlehim

Ruralgaymen Situationalawareness Criticalracetheory Healthliteracy Minorityjudges Travelwithhorses COVID-19Pandemic,2020–

Kookaburra Optogenetics Seabunny Settlercolonialism AfricanAmericanconservatives

NEWNORMALWORDS

RadicalFaeries(NewAgemovement)

Audiodescription Bulbuls Culturedmeat Fathersofchildrenwithdisabilities

Suburbsinliterature Cakepans ChemindeferCongo-océan Energybars(Snackfoods)

Indigenousbusinesspeople Olderblacks �� havetheuniverselivinginthem?).Thebacksteps arealessconspicuouschoicethanthefront becausethesummersunrevealsalltopryingeyes. Thereisalargewatertankbythebacksteps;this isgood.Wecanuseittohidebehindifwehearthe bylawtruck.Thisisoneofourfavouritegames, hidingfromthebylawenforcementofficer.His jobistodrivearoundtownandchasethekids homeandshootstraydogs.Hewantsustobesafe inbed.Arebedssafeanyway? Brightness.Laughter.Weareaganglygroupof fivegirlsandonesmallboy.Wearestuckinthe horridtorrentofawkwardcrushesandcurious sidewaysglances.Clumsyadvanceswithnogoal otherthantosaysomeonelikedyou.Thetimeof wistfullywatchingtheteenagersFrenchkissby thejukeboxandhopingonedaywewouldbefree tosayyes.InthosedaysIdidn’tevenknowhowto sayno.

othergroupatoothysmileandkeepssprinting. Gaspingbreathsandburninglungs,thighsaflame; welettheworldownus.Solesflyingandhearts pounding,weturnthenextcornerandseeagroup ofadults.Gleefullysquealing,wekeepgoing knowinghewillnotpursue.Hewon’trisk beingseenbyadults.

ThefirstguyIjustkickedintheribs;heletout awhoofofairandrolledoffBecky,ontohisback. Theotheronejumpedupandshouted,“Whatdid youdothatfor?”Hewaslargeforhisage,butso wasI,andIremembertheastonishmentonhis face,asifI’dinterruptedsomesacredrite.

Eventhoughshe’sayearolderthanme,itseems likeI’vebeentakingcareofBeckyallmylife. Therewerethesmallthings:takingtheblamefor herclumsinessorlackofattention,fixingthings she’dbrokenbeforeDadfoundout.Butthefirst timeitmovedoutsideourfamilywasthewinter Iturnednine.AfierceManitobablizzardonenight meantourschoolwasclosedthenextday.Most ofthekidsintheneighbourhoodwereplayingon amonstrousdriftthathadblownupagainstthe railroadsnowfence.Icameclimbingoutofatunnelandfoundtwoboysfromherclassholdingher down,tryingtoshovesnowinsidethefrontofher

SnowDay

Heisyellingforustoquitit,butwe areticklinghim,soheisalsolaughing uncontrollably.Weleavehisunderwear andsocksalonefordignity’ssakeandtakehis pantsandshirt.Werunasfastaswecantowards MainStreetwithourbountyashefollows, screamingforustoreturnhisclothing.Asweturn thecornerontoMain,weseeothergroupsofkids. Iassumethathewon’tdarebeseenunclothed,but hebravelyturnsthecornerandsimplythrowsthe

IthinkofallthetimesIhavebeen toldIwasinferiorforbeingagirl.I thinkaboutallthetimesmenhave touchedmewhenIdidn’twantthem to.Ithinkabouthowgooditfeelstobe wavingthepantsofoneofthecockboysin theairwhilehehidesbehindthecorner.Wekeep runningandcircletheschool.Heiswaitingforus ontheotherside,swattingmosquitoesandcrying. Thisisnotthelasttimehewillgethimselfinto troublewithbravadothatcannotbebackedup.He endsupdyingthatway. ��

ThiswasafarmkidnamedByronKozak,who walkedtwomileseachmorningtocometoour school.Maybehisparentsdidn’tevenknowthe schoolwasclosedthatday.Hestoodtherea moment,hischeeksredfromthecoldandexertion,andalineofsnottrailingdownhisupperlip. Hewasbroadacrossthechestandhadalarge headwithaforestofdullblackhair;hisnickname wasCossack.“That’smysister,”Isaid,andnailed himrightinthecentreofhislooming,Slavicface. Mydadhadtoldmethebestwaytodealwitha bullywastopunchhiminthenosebeforehe expectedanything.

Findings21 easilytothegroundandtelltheotherstohelpme. Wearelaughinghysterically.Ipeeloffhisshirt. Hislittlebrowntummyissotaut.Wirylittlesixpack,skinnylittlearms.Wetakeoffhispantstoo. Hisanklesaresothin.Heissodelicate.Hehas largeblackmolespepperedonhisdark skin.Hesmellslikesmokeandpanic. Hehasnohairyet.Twogirlsholdhis legs,onehisarms,andI’mpullinghis clothesoff.It’sourturntobemean.

pants.I’dneverbeeninarealfightbefore,butI knewwhatIhadtodo.

TheCossackfell,shrieking,andIwipedmyfist onthesnow,moreworriedabouthavinghissnot onmymittsthanaboutblood.Iignoredthetwo boysandhelpedBeckyupfromtheground.She criedallthewayhome,andIwonderedhowmuch ofwhathadhappenedIshouldtellmyparents.

CALVINWHARTON From ThreeSongsbyHankWilliams.Published byTurnstonePressin2002.CalvinWhartonis theChairofCreativeWritingatDouglasCollege inNewWestminster,BC,andedited Event from 1996to2001.Heco-editedthepoetryanthology, EastofMain,withTomWayman,andhaspublishedachapbookofpoems, VisualizedChemistry; andthenonfiction Rowing,withSilkenLaumann.

��

Wu’scrimescene;theNavycouldwait. Wuglancedovertheavailableinfo:KuoWeichung,thirty-eight,time-servedPettyOfficer FirstClass,married,twosons,livedinTaipei. Kuo’swifewasonherwaytoidentifythecorpse, courtesyofanavycar. Atafull-throatedcryof“Attention!”Wu turnedtoseethreenavalofficersentertheroom. Themaninfront,acaptain,wrinkledhisnosein disgustashesurveyedthescene. “Who’sinchargehere?”thecaptainasked. Wuwasnotpleased.Whohadletthemintohis crimescene?“Thename’sWu,Criminal Investigation.”

Tri-ServiceGeneral?Wupulledoff hismask.“Wehaven’tfinishedexaminingthesceneyet,andwe’restillwaiting forthemedicalexaminer.”

“Let’sfindsomewherewecantalk,”thecaptain said. Theymadetheirwaytoawindowbythebank ofelevators.Wuwasalmostsixfeet,tallforthe police,butthiscaptainwasaheadabovehim. Well-muscledtoo,perhapsabodybuilderinthe past. “We’reshockedthatthishashappened.There’s anambulanceonthewayfromTri-ServiceGeneraltotakethebodybacktoTaipei.”

So,KuoWei-chung,PettyOfficer FirstClassonaKeeLung–class destroyer,hadshothimselfthatmorning.The hotelhadcalledthelocalpolice,whorushedtothe sceneandthenalertedtheCIB.

Thedeceasedwasdressedneatlyinablue-grey uniformandwassittingwithaviewoftheocean. Hehadshothimselfintherighttemple.The bullethadexitedtheleftsideofhisskull,accompaniedbyvariousblooddrops,brainchunks,and bonefragmentsthathadproceededtosplatterthe previouslypurewhiteandstillcreaselessbedsheets.

22Geist119Winter2021 Takeaway CHANGKUO-LI

“Wasn’titasuicide?” Likehellitwas,Wuthought.Whathe saidwas:“Maybenot.” “Ifitwasn’tasuicide,thenwhatwasit?” Murder,Wuthought.Butwhathesaidwas: “Wejustneedtoclearupafewthings.”

ThegunwasaT75semi-automaticpistol, aversionoftheBerettaM92Fmadebythe205th Armory—9mm,effectiverangeoffiftymetres, fifteen-roundmagazine,knownprimarilyfor beingoutofdateandinaccurate.Butitwashard tobeinaccuratewhenshootingatyourright templewithyourrighthand.

Thelocalpolicehadsealedofftheentirefloor and,thirtyminutesearlier,informedtheNavy, whichhadsentsevenuniformedsailorstostandto attentionatthedooroftheroom.Butitwasstill

ThecarpulledintothedrivewayoftheLaurel Hotel,onthesouthernsideoftheport,justasWu wasdrainingthelastofalarge7-Elevencoffee he’dpickeduptorevivehimself.Onthewayup, theglass-walledelevatorlookedoutovertheport andtwoChengKung–classfrigatesrockingat anchoratthenavalbase.

From TheSniper.Copyright©2019byChang Kuo-Li.Englishtranslationcopyright©2021by RoddyFlagg.ReprintedwithpermissionfromHouse ofAnansiPress,Toronto.ChangKuo-Liisan award-winningnovelist.Hehaspublishedmore thanthirtybooks.HelivesinTaiwan.

AshelefttheelevatorWusawuniformedofficersclusteredatthedoorto Room917.Asweetstenchclawedat thebackofhisthroatashe approached,andhestoppedto borrowafacemask.

“Fine,sohewasleft-handed.Whatelse?”

Thecaptainscowled.“Whatthings?” Tampingdownhistemper,Wuforcedhimself toexplain. “Thehandleofthemugonthetableinfrontof thedeceasedispointingleft.Therearetwoboxes oftakeawayfoodandtwosetsofchopsticks.Asixpackofbeer,oneopenedandhalf-drunk…” “So?”

TherewerelimitstoWu’spatience.“Sohe’s therebyhimself,drinkssomebeer,eatsamouthful ortwooftakeaway.Hisfrienddoesn’tturnup,or turnsupbutdoesn’teat,andinamomentof

Never-endingrain,andnowevenheavier.Keelung wasaporttown,butWuwasstartingtothinkthere wasasmuchwaterintheairasintheharbour.

“Hemusthavearrangedtomeetsomeone, and…” “Keepgoing,”thecaptaintoldhim,glaring. “Thepositionofthemug,withthehandleto theleft.Hewasleft-handed.”

��

ASingleSentence

AHMETALTAN From IWillNeverSeetheWorldAgain. TranslatedbyYaseminÇongar.PublishedbyGranta BooksandOtherPressin2019.AhmetAltanisa Turkishwriterandjournalist.Altanwasaccused ofsending“subliminalmessages”tosupportorganizersofthe2016failedcoupagainstPresidentRecep TayyipErdogan’sgovernment.Hewassentencedto lifeinprison.Followingworldwidepublicoutcry,he wasreleasedfromprisonin2021.Altanwrote IWill NeverSeetheWorldAgain inhisprisoncell. Weleftthebuilding.Wegotintothepolicecarthat waswaitingatthegate. Isatwithmybagonmylap.Thedoorclosed onme. Itissaidthatthedeaddonotknowthatthey aredead. AccordingtoAnatolianmythology,oncethe corpseisplacedinthegraveandcoveredwithdirt andthefuneralcrowdhasbeguntodisperse,the deadpersonalsotriestogetupandgohome,only torealizewhenhehitshisheadonthecoffinlid thathehasdied. Whenthedoorclosed,myheadhitthecoffinlid. Icouldnotopenthedoorofthatcarandgetout. Icouldnotreturnhome. NeveragainwouldIbeabletokissthewoman Ilove,embracemykids,meetwithmyfriends,

“Suspectedmurder,tobeprecise.”

walkthestreets.Iwouldnothavemyroomto writein,mymachinetowritewith,mylibraryto reachfor.Iwouldnotbeabletolistentoaviolin concertoorgoonatriporbrowseinbookstores orbuybreadfromabakeryorgazeontheseaor anorangetreeorsmellthescentofflowers,the grass,therain,theearth.Iwouldnotbeableto gotoacinema.Iwouldnotbeabletoeateggs withsausageordrinkaglassofwineorgotoa restaurantandorderfish.Iwouldnotbeableto watchthesunrise.Iwouldnotbeabletocall anyoneonthephone.Noonewouldbeableto callmeonthephone.Iwouldnotbeabletoopen adoorbymyself.Iwouldnotwakeupagainina roomwithcurtains.

Iwouldalwaysbereceivingorders:“stop,” “walk,”“enter,”“raiseyourarms,”“takeoffyour shoes,”“don’ttalk.” Thepolicecarwasspeedingalong.

Itwasthefirstdayofatwelve-dayreligious holiday.Mostpeopleinthecity,includingthe prosecutorwhohadorderedmyarrest,hadlefton vacation.

“Yourname,Detective?” “Forthesecondtime,Wu.That’sspeltW-U…” “Showabitmorerespect.” Ignoringtheattemptedprovocation,Wu continued.

Findings23

“So,Detective,youthinkit’smurder?”

Evenmynamewasabouttochange. AhmetAltanwouldbeerasedandreplacedwith thenameontheofficialcertificate,AhmetHüsrev Altan. Whentheyaskedformyname,Iwouldsay “AhmetHüsrevAltan.”WhentheyaskedwhereI lived,Iwouldgivethemthenumberofacell. Fromnowon,otherswoulddecidewhatIdid, whereIstood,whereIslept,whattimeIgotup, whatmynamewas.

Thestreetsweredeserted.

“Thetakeawaypackaginginthebinwasfroma branchofNanjingRoastDuckonXinyiRoadin Taipei.SohepickedupfoodinTaipei,tookthe trainorbustoKeelung,boughtthebeeronhis waytothehotel,thensetthetable.Food,beer, chopsticks,hotelmugs…he’swaitingforsomeone.Buthe’sfromTaipei,sowhyishedoingthis allthewayoverhereinKeelungandpayingfora hotelroom?Ifitwasaloverandhewasworried abouthiswifefindingout,why’shestillinuniform?Atowelwouldhavesufficed.”

madnessKuodecidestotryshootinghimselfwith hisrighthand,justtoseeifhe’sasgoodashotas withhisleft.”

“Thechopsticks.Thedeceased’swereonthe leftside,onaplate,andhadbeenused.Theother pairwerestillwrappedandplacedontheother sideofthetable.Hewaswaitingforafriend.”

“Afriend?”Thecaptainfrowned.

24Geist119Winter2021

Thatsinglesentencesuddenlychanged everything. Itdividedrealityintwo,likeaSamuraisword thatinasinglemovementcutsthroughasilkscarf thrownupintheair.

Therearecertainactionsandwordsthatare demandedbytheevents,thedangersandtherealitiesthatsurroundyou.Onceyourefusetoplay thisassignedrole,insteaddoingandsayingthe unexpected,realityitselfistakenaback;ithits againsttherebelliousjettiesofyourmindand breaksintopieces.Youthengainthepowertocollectthefragmentstogetherandcreatefromthem anewrealityinthemind’ssafeharbor.

IwaslikeJuliusCaesar,who,assoonashewas informedthatalargeGallicarmywasonitswayto relievethebesiegedoccupantsofAlesia,hadtwo highwallsbuilt—onearoundthecastletoprevent thoseinsidefromleaving,andonearoundhis troopstopreventthoseoutsidefromentering.

Calisse. Cossin. Enfantd’chienne. Mangeuxd’marde.

Whoknowswherethissentencecamefrom. NowhereinmymindhadIchosentomakesucha declaration.Itwasasentencethatputan unbridgeabledistancebetweenitselfandreality.It ignoredreality,ridiculedit,evenasIwasbeing transformedintoapitifulbugwhocouldnoteven openthedoorofthecarhewasin,whohadlost hisrighttodecidehisownfuture,whosevery

Bâtarddecharognedeciboiredebatincedeboswelldemosus desacréficedecharruedebatèchedecalvinced’espritde cibouleaudecrucifixdesapristidecochonneried’enfant d’chienne.

namewasbeingchanged;abugentangledinthe webofapoisonousspider. Itwasasifsomeoneinsideme,apersonwhom Icouldnotexactlycall“I”butwhonevertheless spokewithmyvoice,throughmymouth,andwho wasthereforeapartofme,saidashewasbeing transportedinapolicecartoanironcagethathe onlysmokedwhenhewas“nervous.”

Christiedepuréedecrisse.

Viargedecharognedebaptêmedeboutd’ciarge. Mautaditdetabarslaquedesacramentdeverratdeboswell desaint-sacramentdepatenteàgossedecolon.

Verratdeviandeàchiend’estiquedeboswelldecrucifixd’ostie demosusdecalvaire.

Thepolicemannexttomelitacigarette,then heldthepacketouttome. Ishookmyheadno,smiling. “Ionlysmoke,”Isaid,“whenIamnervous.”

LOREMBARNAK

Irealizedoncemorethatwhenyouarefaced witharealitythatcanturnyourlifeupsidedown, thatsamesorryrealitywillsweepyouawaylikea wildfloodonlyifyousubmittoitandactasit expectsyouto. Assomeonewhohasbeenthrownintothe dirty,swellingwavesofreality,Icansaywithcertaintythatitsvictimsarethoseso-calledsmart peoplewhobelievethatyouhavetoactinaccordancewithit.

Batèchedemosusdecibouleaudesaintesfessesdecalvinouche decharognedeciboled’enfantd’chiennedesacristidebout d’viargedeverratdebatincedemauditdecrucifixdeJésus MarieJosephdesapristidetorvissedecrimedepuréede sacréficedetorrieuxdetabarnouchedesaint-cimonaque. Ostifiedeviargedeboutd’ciargedeviandeàchiendecibouleau d’astiedetabarnanedecossindesapristidesaintesfessesde crucifixdecharognedecalvairedeciargedechristied’estique detorrieuxdesacristidebatèchedeculdeciboired’esprit decâliboiredecrissedemosusdetorvissedeboswellde tabarslaque. ��

Ononesideofthisrealitywasabodymadeof flesh,bone,blood,muscleandnervethatwas trapped.Ontheothersidewasamindthatdidnot careaboutthatbodyandmadefunofwhatwould happentoit,amindthatlookedfromaboveat whatwashappeningandatwhatwasyetto happen,thatbelieveditselfuntouchableandthat was,therefore,untouchable.

Fromlorembarnak.com,aQuebecoissweargenerator,whichcan produceincreasinglylengthychainsofFrench-Canadiancurseson demand,inthestyleoftheloremipsumnonsenseplaceholdertext. Lorembarnak(awordmadebycombiningloremipsumandtabernak) wascreatedbyHenryMyers,aMontrealsoftwaredeveloper,and canbeaddedtoanyJavascriptproject.

Mytwohighwallswerebuiltwithasingle sentencewhichpreventedthemortalthreats fromenteringandtheworriesaccumulatingin thedeepcornersofmymindfromexiting,so thatthetwocouldnotunitetocrushmewith fearandterror.

Istilldon’tknowhowIcametoutter thesentencethattransformedeverything thatwashappeningtomeandmyperceptionofit, norwhatitsmysticalsourcemightbe.WhatIdo knowisthatsomeoneinthepolicecar,theperson whowasabletosayhesmokedonlywhenhewas nervous,ishiddeninsideme.

ThearticleaboutboomerswasintheBusiness section.Ithighlightedthecontinuedimportance ofboomersbecausetheybought41percentof thesnacks,and46percentofthecandyinthe fifty-twoweeksendinginApriloflastyear.“They aresingle-handedlykeepingtheeconomyafloat,” thearticlesaid.

friendsashesatinabathfullofhotwaterandslit hiswristsonNero’sorders;hadInotreadthat,on theeveofthedayhewastobeguillotined,SaintJusthadwritteninaletterthattheconditionswere difficultonlyforthosewhoresistedenteringthe graveandthatEpictetushadsaidwhenour bodiesareenslavedourmindscan remainfree;hadInotlearnedthat Boethiuswrotehisfamousbookina cellawaitingdeath,Iwouldhavebeen afraidoftherealitythatsurrounded meinthatpolicecar.Iwouldnothave foundthestrengthtoridiculeitand shredittopieces.NorwouldIhavebeen abletoutterthesentencewithsecretlaughterthat rosefrommylungstomylips.No,Iwouldhave coweredwithanxiety. ButsomeonewhomIreckontobemadefrom theilluminatedshadowsofthosemagnificentdead reflectedinmespoke,andthusmanagedtochange allthatwashappening. Realitycouldnotconquerme. Instead,Iconqueredreality. Inthatpolicecarspeedingdownthesunlit streets,Isetthebagthatwasonmylapontothe floorwithasenseofease,andleanedback. ��

OldSeeds M.A.C.FARRANT From OneGoodThing.PublishedbyTalonbooks in2021.M.A.C.Farrantisanaward-winning authoroffiction,reviews,memoirandtwoplays. ShelivesinNorthSaanich,BC.Readmoreofher workatgeist.com. DearHelen, “Boomersarenotadyingbreed.”Ireadthisinthe morningpaper.“Everyeightminutesanotherboomer reachessixty-five.” Likeaplagueofwizenedratscrestingahill,we keeponcoming.Theredoesn’tseemtobeanend tous.Thisistheattitudeoflatergenerations,even

Iwasborninthefirstwave,acoupleofyears afterthewar.Sayingthishasbecomelikestandingupatameetingandsayingyou’reanalcoholic.Exceptthereisnotwelve-stepprogramI canjointomakeamendsforthefactthatmygenerationgoteverything—educations,jobs,houses, generalpractitioners,freshair,toys,trips,leisure, andoftenpeace.

Thetrickistodotheunexpected,tosaythe unexpected.Onceyoucanmakelightofthelance ofdestinypointingatyourbody,youcancheerfullyeatthecherriesyouhadfilledyourhatwith, liketheunforgettablelieutenantinPushkin’sstory “TheShot”whodoesexactlythatwithagun pointingathisheart.

LikeBorges,youcananswerthe muggerwhodemands,“Yourmoney oryourlife,”with,“Mylife.”

Findings25

Heismadeofmanyvoices,laughs,paragraphs, sentencesandpain. HadInotseenmyfathersmileashewastaken awayinapolicecarforty-fiveyearsago;hadInot heardfromhimthattheenvoyofCarthage,when threatenedwithtorture,puthishandinthe embers;hadInotknownthatSenecaconsoledhis

thoughboomerbirthscoveronlythetwentyyears ofpost-WWIIprosperity,1945–1964.

Here’samentalimageofaboomersittinginan armchair,rereading OneFlewOvertheCuckoo’sNest

Thepoweryouwillgainis limitless.

BetweenhereandVancouver,mostofacontinent.Betweenamotheranddaughter,asinewstretchingcityblocks. Pluckitandittwangsatthesamefrequencyastheknottedtrapezius,thefirstnoteofadirgeyou’vebeenhumming sinceearlychildhood.

Atsomepointduringtheday,everyonehada lookatthePranksters’famouspsychedelicbus parkedinthedriveway.Irememberfeelingnothingmuchaboutit,nomatterhowhardItried.The symposiumwasheldonaSaturday,thesameday, itturnedout,thatRichardNixonannouncedhe wasresigningaspresidentoftheUnitedStates.

Myout-breathherin-breath,achainthatfollowsgenerationsbackwardstothefirstwomanleaningover,heaving outsorrowintoaman’semptybed.Iliedownwithmymotheronasinglemattress.Lionsreachintome,following thelinesIlaidoutforthem,onherdresser.

Italkaboutmydreamslikethereissomefactualevidencethatwillsurvivethetraumaofwakingandrealizingthe truthofmylife:itsploddinglinearity,theplumblinethatfollowsabullet’spathtothenextday,andthedayafterthat. I’mtoldIshouldstaypresent.I’mtoldthereissafetyintheout-breath,thatthereisaspacebetweenthoughtand thinkerIwouldseeifonlyIheldstilllongenoughtomeasurethedistance.

Wesleepfordays,alitanyofTuesdaymorningsmarchingpastwindow,facingcourtyard,aplacewhereexhaled sleepgathers.IdreamIreadherdiaryanduncoverallthesecretsthatwillanswerallthequestions.Istandpoised andreadytoask. ��

Ooo,who,who.Ooo,who,who Onthatnote,IoncedancedwithKenKeseyat a“SymposiumonFreedom,”whichwasorganized bytheUniversityofVictoriaonVancouverIsland ataninn.Thedancingwasnothing,arandom thingonacrowdeddancefloor.Iwastwenty-three yearsoldatthetimeandKeseywouldhavebeen aroundthirty-five.Hewasashort,muscularman wearingawhiteshirt,jeans,andcowboybootswith heels,andhadbitsoffluffyhairhereandthereon hisbaldinghead.HeandtheMerryPrankstershad arrivedatthesymposiumoutofnowhere.Itwas moreofabe-inthanasymposium.

FIELDRESEARCH

26Geist119Winter2021 byKenKeseywhilelisteningtotheStones’“SympathyfortheDevil”andeatingsour-creamand green-onionpotatochips.WhatatimeI’mhaving keepingtheeconomyafloat!

Ithinkwecanagreethattheboomergenerationhas,aboveallelse,beenasearchingandfreewheelingone.Someofitsmembersarestilllike that.Myfriend,Gerald,fromhighschool,for example.Here’sanillustrationofenlightenment hemadenotlongago,afteryearsofweed-guided study.Itseemstorepresentaparticularexperience ofthegenus Existentialisweedii,onethatmoves beyondastonishment. “Ifinallygotitright,”hesaidwhenheshowed theillustrationtome. IpromisedIwouldpassitaround.Hereitis. Ithasacertain something,don’tyouthink? ��

From Render bySachikoMurakami(ArsenalPulpPress,2020).Reprintedwithpermission.SachikoMurakamiistheauthor offourpoetrycollections,including Render and TheInvisibilityExhibit (Talonbooks),bothshortlistedfortheGovernor General’sLiteraryAwardforPoetry.ShelivesinToronto.Findheratsachikomurakami.com.

Checkherbreathing.Prepareaplausiblestoryforwhyyou’rehere,alieyouwilltelltotomorrow.Whenthedoctors arrivetheywillwavetheusualinstrumentsoverourlives,listeningforsignalsofthepast.Whendoeschronicbronchitis becomeachildyoucanname,atreatablecondition?

28Geist119Winter2021

TheInsulinSoldiers

Essay29 ESSAY

Patientswho’dfallenillduringwartimeweregivenfreetreatment thathadtakenonthequalitiesofamiracle

BackinCanadain1919,hewaspostedtotheChristieStreethospitalinwest-end Toronto,wherethepatientshadmissinglimbsorgravefacialwounds,gaspoisoningor tuberculosis.Thebuildingitselfwasahastilyrenovatedcashregisterfactory,withextra storeysaddedtoitssimple,boxyshapetoaccommodatesomeninehundredmen.Itwas UniversityofTorontoFacultyofMedicineclassof1917,Bantingsitsfourthfromtheleftinthe frontrow.CourtesyoftheThomasFisherRareBookLibrary,UniversityofToronto.

KRISTENDENHARTOG

Justafewyearsbeforehisfamedco-discoveryofinsulinasatreatmentfordiabetes, Dr.FrederickBantingwasatwar,servinginafieldambulanceinFrance,gunsthundering intheneardistance.AgraduateoftheUniversityofToronto’smedicalschool,hisstudies hadbeencondensedbecauseoftheneedfordoctorstotreatmassivenumbersofwounded, andin1917,hewentoverseaswiththeCanadianArmyMedicalCorps.Asheamputated limbsandstitchedgunshotwoundsneartheFront,hecouldn’thaveimaginedtheturn hisworkwouldtakeoncethewarended,northeeffectitwouldhaveonagroupofveterans underhiscare.Hehadlittleawarenessofdiabetes,andnoideahowwidespreaditwas. Thediseaseaffectedthebody’sabilitytocontrolbloodsugar,whichinturnharmedthe organs,bloodvessels,andnerves.Therewasnoknowncure,thoughnewspaperadssometimessuggestedotherwise.Onetestimonialclaimed,“I’msureIwouldbeinmygrave today,butforDodd’sKidneyPills.…[They]havedonesomuchformethatIfeellike recommendingthemtoeverybody.”Inreality,adiagnosisofdiabeteswasdevastating news.InlateryearsBantingwrotethatitwas“adiseasethatpeopledidnottalkabout. …Itwasusuallyafamilysecretknownonlytothedoctor.”

hedoctorJosephGilchrist,afriendandclassmateofFredBanting’sduringmedicalschool, wouldhaveunderstoodhisprognosisbetterthan theaveragepatientwhenhewasdiagnosedwith diabetesin1917.BythenhewaspartoftheCanadianArmyMedicalCorps,havingreportedforduty, likeFredandtherestoftheirclass,immediately aftergraduation.Hisyearbookentrystatesthathe “ploddedthroughthedarknessofArtsintothelight ofMedicine,wherehewillbaskwhenthewaris o’er.”Buthenevermadeitoverseaswithhisfellow youngdoctors.AroundthetimethatFredsetsail, inMarch1917,Joeexperiencedhisfirstsymptoms:extremethirst,frequent,abundanturination, acravingforsweets,weakness,andweightloss. Testsshowedsugarintheurine,andthoughhis symptomsclearedupwhencarbohydrateswere removedfromhisdiet,theycameragingbackwhen hereturnedtoeatingnormally.“Immediatelyafter eatingevenasliceofbread,”onedoctornotedin hisrecord,“heshows2%sugarintheurine.”The recommendedtreatmentwasrest,freshair,exercise ChristieStreethospital,Toronto,1940. TorontoStar PhotographArchive,courtesyofTorontoPublicLibrary.

HesetupapracticeinLondon,Ontario,supplementinghisincomebylecturingattheuniversity. Teachingwasstimulating,sincethereadinghedidto preparehistalksfurtheredhisowntruncatededucation.Oneofthearticlesgothimcontemplatingthe roleofthepancreasindiabetes,andhebecamefixatedontheideaofinvestigatingthepossibilitiesina laboratorysetting.VisitingTorontoforthewedding ofaChristieStreetnurse,heaskedsomemedicalcolleagueswhattheythoughtofhimgivingupprivate practiceforresearch.“Theyalladvisedagainstsucha radicalmove,”helaterrecalled.ButBanting pushedaheadwithhisplan,andbyspring1921his famousworkwithCharlesBesthadbegunatthe UniversityofToronto,andwouldsooninvolve patientsattheChristieStreethospital.

WalterCampbell,aspecialistindiabetesanda colleagueofBanting’s,laterwrotethat“beforethe FirstWorldWar,therewereonlytwotypesofdiabetics,thosewhodiedquicklyandthosewhostuck arounddeterioratingforalongtime.”Dietary controlswerethemainformoftreatment,butby nomeansacure.Peopleslippedintocomasor diedofstarvation—themosteffectiveapproach wasaliquiddietthatstarvedthepatientuntil sugardisappearedfromtheurine.Thepatient couldthenbegintoeatinsmallbutincreasing quantities,withallfoodstrictlyweighedand recorded,untilthesugarreappeared.Thisdeterminedthepatient’sglucosetolerancelevel,andthe dietthatwouldneedtobefollowed.

30Geist119Winter2021 situatedalongaraillineinwhatwasthenan industrialpartoftown,butitprovidedacommunityofsorts,formostofthestaffandpatientshad servedoverseasandhadasharedunderstandingof war.Togethertheyateinthehugedininghallin thebasement,andgatheredintheauditoriumfor showsbythelateststars.Theycouldalsovisitthe rooftopward,wherepatientswithspinaltuberculosisbaskedinthesunasheliotherapytreatment fortheirillness.Thehospitalwaslikeavillageina way,andsomeofitspeople—staffandpatients— wouldstillbetherewhenthenextwarstarted,or fortheremainderoftheirlives.FredBanting’sstay wasshort,though,andwhenhewasdischarged fromthearmysixmonthson,heprobablydidn’t thinkhe’dreturntothehallsofChristieStreet. Thewarwasover,andhewasfinallyayoungciviliandoctorembarkingonhiscareer.

Itwasalreadyunderstoodthatthepancreas playedaroleinprocessingsugars,andthatwhena personbecamediabetic,somethingmustbeamiss withthatorgan.Thegoalwastoisolatewhat researcherssuspectedwasaninternalsecretion withinthepancreasthatregulatedmetabolism, anduseittotreatdogswho’dbeenrendereddiabeticbypancreatectomy.Intheearlyexperiments byBantingandBest,dogs’pancreaseswere removedandgrounduptomakeaserumthat hopefullycontainedthemysterioussecretion. Havinganadequatesupplyofdogswasaproblem andeventually,thepancreaseswereobtainedfrom cowsandpigsatslaughterhouses.

Withinamonth,though,theextractwasgiven byinjectiontoateenageboyatTorontoGeneral Hospital.Weighing65lb.onadmission,Leonard Thompsonwasconsideredsoneardeaththat eventhewildestexperimentgavehimmoreofa chancethandoingnothing.Theboyreacted badlytothefirstshot,buttherewasmajor progresswhentheextract—tinkeredwithand vastlyimprovedbyabiochemistnamedJames Collip—wastriedagain.Toseeabodysoutterly transformedwasastonishing.Itwasasthougha magicpotionhadbroughthimbacktolife.Asthe serumwastriedonmorepatientsinmoreplaces, theamazementspread,andpressuremountedto mzakethemedicinewidelyavailable.American diabetesspecialistElliottJoslinlikenedthe serum’seffectto“nearresurrections,” andhad highhopesforhisownpatients,whowerewastingawayonstarvationdietsinadiabeticclinic inBoston.

Thesewerethrillingtimesforpeopleinvolved inthedevelopmentandproductionofinsulin.The senseofurgencyaroundtheaffairsparkedplenty ofcollaboration,infighting,selflessnessandego astheworkevolvedandvariousdoctorsandscientistshelpedperfect,produceanddeliverthe treatment.Ahundredyearslater,thespotlight still shinesbrightestonFredBanting,thoughhe wasfarfromtheloneplayer:alongwithdoctors, academics,andpharmaceuticalcompanies,the dramaenfoldednurses,orderlies,dietitians, patients,andpatients’families—andalsoveterans newlyreturnedfromWorldWarI. Byspring1922,aclinicaltrialatChristieStreet hadbeenarranged,anddiabeticsoldierswere beingrecruited.JoeGilchristwasasupervisingdoctoraswellasapatient participant.Medicare wasstillyearsoff,so the patientswereluckytheir illnesshadsurfacedin wartime,forthosewho’d fallenillduringservice wereentitledtofree healthcare,whichinthis casemeantatreatment thathadtakenonthe qualitiesofamiracle.As soldiers,theyknewwhat itwasliketobehungry, coldandtired,andthen tohavethatdiscomfort compoundedbyillness. Andyet,knowingthe treatmentwasexperimentalmayalsohave madethemwary.Each patientsignedadeclarationstatingthatthetreatmenthadbeenthoroughlyexplainedtohim,andthat he understoodithadn’tyet reached“astageoffinality”—theworkinvolvedanelementofrisk,and“it isnotyetfullyknownjustwhatthetreatmentwill do.”ButforthemostpartthemenattheChristie Streetclinicwereseverediabeticswithbleakfutures. Onemanwasalreadyinacomawhenadmitted,and anotherweighedafrightening76lb. Themenrangedinagefromtwenty-fivetofiftythree.Followingaphysicalandtheestablishmentof individualdietandinsulinlevels,theyweremonitoredbydoctorsandnurses,andalsoChristie’strio F.G.Bantingwithdog,ca.1927.CourtesyoftheThomasFisherRareBookLibrary,UniversityofToronto.

Essay31 andan“anti-diabetesdiet”thatquicklyturnedhim gauntandrangy. Postwar,JoeGilchristcontinuedfollowingthese principles,hishealthslowlyworseninguntilOctober1921,whenhecontractedsevereinfluenzathat shatteredhisglucosetolerance.Thepoundsbegan tofallaway.Hewasthirstyandhungry;sugarwas alwayspresentinhisurinesamples,andsometimes hisbreathsmelledofacetone—asharp,acrid,rottingfruitscentandaclearsignofdangerously increasedacidityinthebloodandapoorlyfunctioningmetabolism.

Atfirsthehadnoideahisillnesscoincided withhisoldclassmate’sobsession,butshortly afterhisboutwithinfluenza,newsofBantingand Best’sresearchbegantravelinginmedicalcircles. TheygaveatalkattheUniversityofTorontoin NovemberandanotheratTorontoGeneralHospitalinDecember,andsomewherearoundthis time,JoeapproachedFredandaskedtotrythe serum.Evenifhehadn’tbeendiabetic,hewould havethoughttheworkexciting,buthisownmedicalhistoryaddedaprofoundlayertohisinterest intheresearch,andhewaseagertobewhathe calleda“humanrabbit”forthecause.Hewas givenanoraldose,probablybecausetheextract hadn’tbeentriedonhumansyet,andinjection wasconsideredtoorisky.

Buttheoutcomewasdisappointing.Fredwroteinhisnotes,“Dec20. PhonedJoeGilchrist–gavehimextractthatwe knewtobepotent.–bymouth.emptystomach. Dec21–nobeneficialresult.”

warhadcausedhisillness.

Thehospitalspecializedin heartcases,whomostlyresponded welltotreatmentthatinvolved convalescingontheverandahand engaginginphysicaltherapy.But afterfortydaysatBushy,Jim

ofdietitians:femaleuniversitygraduateswhoseprofessionwasjustcomingintopublicawareness.Ideally,themenreceivedtheirinjectionsthreetimesa day,thoughatthisearlystage,producingenoughof theextractandobtainingapure,effectiveproduct wasdifficult.Whentheycouldgettheirshots,many patientsdevelopedlarge,excruciatingabscessesat theinjectionsite.Astrongextractcausedmore severesideeffects,butaweakeronerequiredlarge dosesthatweremorepainfultoreceive.Asthe doctor-patient,JoeGilchristtookthefirstsampleof eachbatch,accordingtoBanting,andfollowedup withregularbloodsugartests.“Idoubtifthereisa personintheworldwhohashadhisveinspuncturedsomanytimes.Hehad abscessesatthesiteofinjection onverymanyoccasions,buthe tookhisinjectionsregularlyand persistently.”Thepainandthe inconsistencyofthetreatment mademenreluctanttojointhe studyasitinchedforward.“But thenaneventoccurred,”wrote Banting,“whichsurprisedand encouragedeveryone…Oneof thefaithfulladsaskedforleave. Thiswasamostunusual request.Healsowantedinsulin totakewithhim.Hewasintelligentandcouldlookafterhimself&hisrequestsweregranted.Onthefollowing Mondaymorninghereturnedallsmiles.‘Forthe firsttimeinthreeyearsIamamanagain,’hetold everyone.Severeuntreateddiabeticsloseallsex desire.Withinsulinthedesireandpowerreturned. Bynighteverydiabeticinthehospitalwasasking forinsulin.” J

hadn’timproved.“Generalconditionnotgood. Hehasnotreactedwelltoexercises.”Hereturned toCanada,andbackinTorontoanexamination revealed“mancannotwalkonemilewithoutrestingatintervals.”Runningforastreetcarsethis heartracingandhislungsheavingforair.Afamily storysaysthathewasayoung,fitmanwhenhe wenttowar,thathewasburiedinashellexplosion,andthathisrapiddeclinemadeitseemthat

SupervisingdoctorandpatientparticipantDr.JosephGilchrist,ca.1920s.

CourtesyoftheThomasFisherRareBookLibrary,UniversityofToronto.

AftertheBattleofVimyRidgeinApril1917,he camedownwithanillnessthatdoctorscouldn’tpinpoint.Hewasnervousandtired—notsurprisingconsideringhisplacementattheFrontandhisrankof signaller.Signallerskeptthecommunicationflowing toandfromthefrontlines,layingcablesinthe trenchesandrepairingthemwhentheywereblown apartbyshellfireorbrokenbysoldiers’boots.Signallersalsoencodedanddecodedmessages,orcarried theminperson,travellingthroughthetrenches whenthetechnologyfailed.Fordefensivepurposes, trencheswereduginazigzagpattern,makingshort distancesmuchlonger.Sometimesthesemissions

Thetimingofhisdiabetesdiagnosisisn’tcertain, butby1921hewaslivingjustwestoftheChristie Streethospital,workingasamailclerk.Hishealth waspoorandhisthirstwasinsatiable.He’dfillabig glassmilkbottlewithwaterbeforebed,andby morninghe’dhavedrunkitall.Despitehisillness, theperiodmusthavebeenjoyful,forhe’dfallenin lovewithawomannamedGrace,wholivednearby andworkedatEaton’sdepartmentstore.Jim’s descendantssuspectGrace’sfamilydidn’tapprove ofthematch,perhapsbecauseJimwasunwelland hisfutureinquestion.Butyouwouldn’tguessathis

imOstromwasoneoftheyoungerpatients.

tookasoldierintothewideopen,whereherisked sniperfireorburialbyashellexplosion;orhetravelledfurtherafield,crossingterritoryhedidn’tknow andmemorizingthelandscapeforthereturntrip. Amanhadtohavestaminaandgoodinstinctsfor suchpotentiallydangerousmissions.

Fitandhealthywhenhe’denlisted,nowJim experiencedpalpitations,vertigo,and“airhunger,” meaninghegaspedforbreathontheslightestexertion.HewasinvalidedtoEnglandanddiagnosed with“disorderedactionoftheheart,”alsocalled “soldier’sheart,”anailmentthoughttobecausedby stressandexhaustionratherthanorganicdisease. HewasmovedtoaconvalescenthomeinBushy Park,whichneighbouredthe splendidHamptonCourtPalace ontheoutskirtsofLondon.Ifhe feltwellenoughtoenjoyit,this wassurelyawonderfulplaceto be,withariverthatfedcascadingpoolsandawaterfall,deer roamingbeneathchestnuttrees, andbirdschirpinginthe woodlands.

32Geist119Winter2021

JoeGilchristinvitedthereportertovisitthe ChristieStreetclinicandmeetthepatientshimself, nineofthematthattime.One—amannamed Doherty—claimedhe’dbeenclosetocomatose whenhe’denteredthehospital,and“almostliterally amassofskinandbones.”Thedoctorsthoughthe’d diewithinafewdays,butsincethenhe’dgained25 lb.,andhisskin,once“dryandbrownlikethatofa mummy,”wasnowfreshand pink.“Hiseyessparkle,andhe declaresthatheisfitforanything.”Allofthemenspokeof weightgainandrenewed energy,butalsoasenseofhope. Saidoneman:“It’sgivenmea chanceformylife.” JimOstromhadbeendischargedfromChristieStreetby thistime,butthe Star reporter wentalongtohishometoask abouttheoverdosethathad senthimclimbingthewallsof theward.“Mr.Ostromadmittedhavinghadcertainpronouncedreactions,butadded:‘I wouldbewillingtoclimbthe CPRbuildingifIcouldgetthe benefitthatIgotfromthetreatment.’”

Thedosewashardtogetright, especiallyatthattime,whenthe qualitiesofinsulinbeingproduced werevariable.AroundChristmas in1922,JoeGilchristdelivereda lecturedescribingacaseofhypoglycemiabroughtonbythe administrationoftoolargeadose. Theman—JimOstrom—had receivedhisinjectioninthelate afternoon,thengonedowntothe hospitaldiningroomandeatena heartymeal,“butby8o’clockhe evincedastrongdesiretoclimbup thewallsoftheward.”Gilchrist describedthefirstsignofahypoglycemicreactionasamixedfeelingofanxiety,restlessness,and dread.Afterthat,thepatientwouldstarttosweatand cravefood—lotsofanythingwoulddo.Thenthe tremblingwouldbegin;theskinblanched,thepulse raced,thepupilsdilated.Asthebloodpressure dropped,thepatientwouldfeelfaintandlosetheabilitytoconcentrateandcallupnamesandordinary words.Withouttheingestionofglucosetorelievethe symptoms—whichJimquicklyreceivedatChristie— convulsionsandcomacouldfollow.

Someofthiswasknownbecauseofexperimentsonanimals.Whenthe TorontoDailyStar reportedonGilchrist’slecture,italsodetailed experimentsdoneonrabbitsthathadbeenintentionallysentintoconvulsionswithoverdosesof insulin.Theygrewsohungrytheydevouredwood shavings;theireyesbulged;theypantedandjerked themselvesaround;theystiffenedandlostconsciousness.Theexperimentsconfirmedthatsugar wasaneffectiveantidote.Whennewsofthestory reachedananimalrights’activist,shecontacted thelocalGreatWarVeterans’Associationand urgedthemtojointheantivivisectionistfightand protesttheinhumanetreatmentofsoldiersatthe hospital,whichinturnpromptedthe Star to investigate.

Essay33 frailtyonseeinga1920photoofJimandGrace:Jim wearsaflatcapandcivvies,hissleevesrolledup; he’sliftedGracetooneshoulder,andsheperches there,smilingandleaningintohim,handsfoldedat hiscollarbone.Theymarriedaweekaftertheemaciatedboy,LeonardThompson,receivedhistransformativeinjectionofinsulin,andinthefollowing monthstheymusthavefelthopefulthatwhatthe presswascalling“oneofthemostimportantdiscoveriesinmodernmedicalresearch”wouldmakea differenceintheirlives.Asmedicineforadebilitatingdisease,insulinseemedmiraculous,andmany believeditmightbeapermanentcure—thatwith enoughinjections,thebodymightrelearntheabilitytoregulatebloodsugar.

Thecash-register-factory-turned-hospitalhad becomeacentreofinnovationinitsfewshort yearsofexistence,withX-rayandelectrictherapy departments,therooftopwardforheliotherapy, andateamofspecialistsdevotedtothenewfield ofplasticsurgery,rebuildingchinsandnoses. Now,inaspeciallyequippedlaboratory,themen ofthediabeticwardlearnedhowtotesttheirown bloodandurineforsugarlevels,checkthe strengthoftheinsulin,andadministertheirown doses.Theyknewtoalwayscarryabitofcandy, andtocarefullymonitortheirdiet.Menwho’d struggledtoclimbaflightofstairscouldsoonwalk twoorthreemilesadaywithnotrouble.With otherpatientsatChristieStreet,theytookfield tripstosprawlingHighPark,ortravelledby streetcarandferrytotheTorontoIslands.They hadrenewedenergybutalsoenthusiasm,and Earlymanufactureofbottledinsulin,1923.CourtesyoftheSanofiPasteurLimited(ConnaughtCampus)Archives.

Afterhisdischargefromthearmy,hereturned tohisoldjobatthefurrier’s,wherehe’dbegunat theageoffourteen.Butoverthenextyear,he developedsoresonhischinandthebackofhis neck,andhegrewweakandthin.Doctorsdiagnoseddiabetes,andhewashospitalizedinOttawa ashisdiseasequicklyprogressed.Atonepointhe receivedlessthanfourhundredcaloriesaday, “obviouslywaybelowhisbodyrequirements,”but necessary,thedoctorsthought,tocontrolhis metabolism.Hesufferedrecurringattacksofdiarrheaandedema,aswellinginhisface,legsand ankles.Hissymptomsweresopersistentthatone doctorwonderedifsomeonewassneakinginfood forhim,since“themathematicsofdiabeticfeeding”justdidn’taddup.Thedoctoraddedthat “theman’smoraleisbadlyshakenandthisidea shouldnotmilitateagainsthim.”TheOttawa doctorsfelttheycouldn’tofferhimthespecialized careheneeded,normonitorhisconditionclosely enough,buttherewaslittleimprovementaftera stayinElliottJoslin’sBostonclinic.Joslinwould goontobecomeaworldleaderinthetreatment ofdiabetes,butatthistimehe,too,implemented thestarvationtreatment,trainingpatientsto managetheirconditionbydiet.Theworkwas heartbreaking,andhefollowednewsofencouragingdevelopmentsinTorontofromtheearliest days.“Naturallyifthereisagrainofhopefulness intheseexperimentswhichIcangivetopatients,” hewroteina1921lettertoBanting’ssupervisor, “…itwouldaffordmuchcomfort,notonlyto them,buttomeaswell,becauseIseesomany patheticcases.” Byspring1922,OgdenBessererwas“markedly undernourished”andweighed110lb.,40lb.less thanwhenhe’dleftthearmyafewyearsearlier. Newsoftheinsulintrialsmusthaveofferedawelcomesparkofhope.“Arrangementsarebeing made,”stateshisrecord,“tohavethismanadmittedtoChristieStreethospital,Toronto,sothatDr. Banting’streatmentmaybetried.”

patchovertheeye—thevisionproblemssubsided duringthenextsixweeks,andOgdenreturnedto Canada.It’simpossibletoknowifhesuspecteddiabetes,butitseemslikely.Duringhistimeinthe army,herequestedaportionofhisearnings—separationpayusuallyreservedforwivesandfamily— gotoawomannamedLauraBlake,listedonlyas “friend”inhisrecord.Laurawasasinglewoman whoworkedasagovernmentstenographer.Did theyhesitatetomarrybecauseofOgden’sillness?

Ogdentravelledoverseasearlyin1918.Hewas adriver,chargedwithdeliveringammunitionto thefrontline,andthoughhemadeitthroughthe warunscathed,justbeforeChristmas—whenhe wasstillinFrance—hecomplainedofdouble vision.Theproblemhadcomeonsuddenlyand persisted.Inmedicalterms,itwascalled“diplopia,” andwhileitwassometimesnotedinshellshock cases,itcanalsobeasymptomofdiabetes,when damagetocirculationcausesapalsyinthemuscles thatcontroleyemovement.Themusclesofone eyestopworking,sothetwocan’taligntogetherto sendacohesivemessagetothebrain.IfOgdenwas stillworkingasadriveratthistime,thesymptoms wouldhavebeenespeciallydangerousandfrightening.But“withtreatment”—probablyrestanda

OgdenBessererwastwenty-eightwhenhewas conscriptedin1917.He’dbeenmanagingthefur departmentofapopularshopinOttawa;hewasn’t married,andhewasyoungandseemedrelativelyfit, accordingtohismedicalexamination.Onhispaternalside,hewasofGermanancestry,buthisfamily, mixedwithFrench-Canadians,hadbeeninCanada forgenerations,andhisgrandfatherhadowned greatswathsoflandinOttawa,andhadnamed streetsafterfamilymembers.ByWWI,thearea thathadoncebeenBessererpropertywasabustling neighbourhoodcalledSandyHill.Whenhis youngerbrotherTheodorevoluntarilyenlistedin 1915,Ogdenkeptonwithhisjob,perhapsbecause heknewhishealthwasfragile.Atagetwenty-two, justbeforethewarbegan,anotherbrotherhaddied inadiabeticcoma,andafamilyhistoryofdiabetes wasnotedinTheodore’sservicerecord.Thefirst greatlosshadhappenedinOgden’schildhood, whenhismother,alsoadiabetic,diedatthirty-two.

34Geist119Winter2021 joinedinthehospital’sbeadingorbasketryworkshops,tryingtooutdoeachotherwiththeircreations.Theeffectoftheinsulinwassonoticeable thatstrangerswhovisitedtheward—medical expertsfromothercitiesandcountries—saidthey couldtellataglancewhohadbegunreceiving injectionsandwhohadn’tstartedtheirtreatment. Nevertheless,therewerelosses.Someofthemen weresounwellwhentheyarrivedthatthere wasjustnosavingthem.Theyhadweakenedhearts ortuberculosis,orothercomplicationsthatpersisted evenwhentheinsulinworked.Thedeathsmusthave beenablowtoboththecaregiversandthefellow “rabbits,”whowouldhaveworriedabouttheirown chancesforsurvival.

InJune,Ogdenjoinedtherestofthemenonthe diabeticward.Hewasinroughshapeuponadmission,withclustersofboils,skininfectionsand abscessedgums.Thoughemaciated,theswellingin hislegsandfacepersisted.Toaddtohisdiscomfort, thehospital’sproximitytoarailwaymeantthatthe buildingshookwhentrainsshuntedpast.Hedidn’t sleepwell,andsometimessufferednightsweatsthat soakedhispyjamasandmadehimcoldandclammy. Despitehisplacementinapioneeringtrial,hecontinuedtofalter.JoeGilchristjotteddownthat Ogden’smusclemasshaddiminished,andthathe experienced“lossofmemory,lossofinterestin thingsgenerally.”Dosesoftheextractseemedto helpsomedaysbutnotothers, andbySeptemberhewasso unwellthatinjectionswere stopped,andhewasmovedtoa privateward.Heachedallover. Hisvisionblurred.Hewasunable todistinguishbetweenpeoplehe knew,thoughtherecorddoesn’t specifyiffamilyorthefriend namedLaurawereamonghisvisitors.Bythetimeofhisdeathat agethirty-three—aroundtheage hismotherhaddied—heweighed 96lb.Thesecrecyaroundtheillness,whichBantingwroteabout inlateryears,showsintheobituarythatappearedinthe Ottawa Citizen:Ogdenhadbeenundergoing“specialtreatment”atthe ChristieStreethospital,thepiece said,but“diedastheresultofillnesscontractedbyover-exposure atthefrontduringthewar.”Theword diabetes was notmentioned.

In1951,JoewasadmittedtoSunnybrookHospital,originallyaveterans’hospitalbuilttoreplacethe oldcashregisterfactoryonChristieStreet.Nevera DiabeticpatientJimOstromandhispartnerGraceParliament,1920.CourtesyoftheOstromfamily.

availabledoseswereallgoingtotheveterans.Soon thetrialsexpandedfurther,toTorontoGeneral HospitalandtheHospitalforSickChildren,and theworkcontinuedatChristieStreet,withJoe GilchristinchargeandBantingandBestinhigh demandelsewhere. Bythesummerof1923,insulinwasbeingusedin theUnitedStates,England,theNetherlands, ChinaandAustralia.Therewerearticlesravingabout patientsbeing“broughtbackfromtheverythreshold ofdeath,”soitwasnotsurprisingwhen,laterthatyear, BantingandJohnMacleod,hissupervisorattheUniversityofToronto,receivedtheNobelPrizein Medicine,andinturnsharedthe awardwithCharlesBestand JamesCollip.Thediscovery madethemenfamous,andcould havemadethemrich,too,but ratherthanprofitpersonally, theteamsoldthepatenttothe UniversityofTorontoforone dollar,andtheuniversitysetup committeesthatwouldoversee itsuseinternationally,avoiding monopolizationandensuringthe drugwasaffordableandwidely available.Thesystemremained inplaceuntilthe1950s.Today, eveninCanada,manydiabetics can’taffordthefullcostoftheir treatment,andrationtheiruse ofinsulin.

Bantingdidn’tlivetoseethe changes.In1941,hediedina planecrash,makingheadlines onceagainasaheroanda“greatbenefactorof mankind.”In1934,he’dbeenknightedforhisaccomplishments—adoctor,a SirandaNobellaureateallat once.OnewondershowJoeGilchristfeltduring Banting’sglorydays,remainingintheshadows,yet havingplayedsuchanintegralpartinthedevelopmentofamedicinethatwouldsavesomanylives worldwide.“Itwasonhim,”Bantinghimselfhad writtenshortlybeforehisdeath,“thatwetriednot onlynewbatchesofinsulin…butalsomanyexperimentsthathadtobecarriedout,forexample,the timeinrelationtomeals,thedistributionofdosage, thetreatmentforoverdose.”

Ogdenwasthelastoffourdiabeticstodieat Christiethatmonth.Oftheearlierdeaths,two wererecentadmissionstothehospital;thethird,a brewer’slabourer,leftbehindawifeandfivechildrenlivinginpoverty.Followingaswelteringcity summerwithmajorproblemsininsulinproduction,theselossesmusthavedemoralizedthewhole diabeticteam.ThatfirstsummerduringtheclinicaltrialsatChristieStreet,BantingwrotetoBest that“worsethantheheatasadisturbanceisthat diabeticsswarmaroundfromalloverandthink thatwecanconjuretheextractfromtheground.” Desperatesoulsevenshowedupatthelab,hoping togetinsulin,thoughatthattimethesporadically

Essay35

UnlikeJoeGilchrist,OgdenBesserer,andso manyotherdiabeticstheworldover,JimOstrom livedalonglife,raisingtwosonswithGraceina pleasantneighbourhoodinToronto.Hecontinued toworkasapostalclerk,andtookexcellentcareof hishealth,eatingwellandrisingearlyeachmorning toboilhissingleinsulinneedle.Hisnowninetyfive-year-oldsonRonrecallsthathisfatheralways carriedbutterscotchcandieswhentheywenton drives,andthathehadhisownmini-laboratoryin thebasementoftheirhome:astaughtatChristie Street,he’dpeeintoatesttube,heattheurineand achemicalreagentoveraBunsenburner,andmeasurehisglucoselevelbythecolourthesolution turned,whichtoldhimhowmuchinsulinhe needed.Despitescrupulousself-care,hesometimes wentintodiabeticshock:asthefamilysatatthe dinnertable,“theknifeandforkwouldstartrattling,”Ronrecalls,andGracewouldhavetogetJim tothefloorand“gettheOJintohim.”Halfan orangeusuallysufficedwhenhehadaninsulinreaction,butoccasionallyheworsenedandslippedinto acomaandhadtoberushedtohospital.

36Geist119Winter2021 purpose-builtfacility,ChristiehadbecomeovercrowdedwhenWWIIsoldiersbeganarriving,and thoughdescribedinthepressas“thebestofits kindonthecontinent”and“aMeccafordoctors whorejoiceinmodernscientificimprovements,” by1945itwaslabelledadisgrace,andagroupof Torontowomentookituponthemselvestopush fornewaccommodations.“[ChristieStreet]isold, cockroach-infestedandrat-ridden,”onewoman wrotetothepensionsminister,“andsickand woundedmenaresufferingthereneedlessly.”

Therecordalso notesaseparationfromhiswife,andanongoingbattle withmentalillnessfollowinghisyearsatChristie Street.“Sincetheearly30s,hehasbeenoveractive mentallyandphysicallyhavinganobsessive-compulsive behaviourwithgrandioseideas.…Heisverytalkativeandkeepsonreferringabouthisresearchhe didbackintheearly30s.Hehasthetruemental activityofamanicdepressive.Histhoughtprocesses aredisjointedandmixedwithdelusionsofimportanceandinfluencewithoccasionalparanoidal ideas.”Joeralliedforatimeandwasdischarged,but returnedtoSunnybrookthatsameyear,“ingross cardiacfailure.” Hediedsoonafter,ofheartdisease causedbydiabetes.A GlobeandMail obituary acknowledgedthathe’dbeen“thefirstwalkingdiabeticpatienttoreceivetheinsulintreatment,”and also“apersonalfriendofSirFrederickBantingand Dr.C.H.Best.”Therewasno mention,though,of thecliniche’drunatChristieStreet,andhisvital roleasbothpatientanddoctor.

hesecondwarwasoverbythetimepatientswere movedintoSunnybrook,sothebuilding—a “palaceofhealing”accordingto Maclean’s—wasonly afewyearsoldwhenJoeGilchristwasadmitted, thistimejustapatientandnotadoctorincharge. Hewasinhislatefifties,hislegs,armsandbuttocks scarredfromyearsofinsulininjections.Hispension recordstatesthathe’dcontrolledhisdiabeteswell onhisownuntilshortlybeforehisadmission,when hestartedhavingchestpainandshortnessofbreath thatcausedhimtospeak“ingasps.”

KristendenHartogisanovelistandnon-fictionwriter whosemostrecentbook, TheCowkeeper’sWish,was co-authoredwithhersisterTracyKasaboski.Shelives inToronto.Readmoreofherworkatgeist.com.

Andyet,JimoutlivedGrace,whosufferedtwo massivestrokesanddiedinherfifties.Hestayed onaloneintheirhomeforawhile,butonce,inthe throesofaninsulinreaction,hestartedhammeringonthewallsharedwithhisneighbour,who phonedJim’ssonLloydinapanic.Afterthat,Jim hadalive-incaregiverforatime,buteventually movedintoSunnybrook,whereheremaineduntil hisdeathatalmosteightyyearsold.

Jim’sgranddaughterAnne—thedaughterof Lloyd—remembershergrandfatherwell,andsays thatlikemostveterans,hedidn’treallytalkabout thewar.ButperhapshedidatSunnybrook,where helivedwithotherswho’dbeensoldiersandhis memorieshadadifferentcontext.EverySaturday LloydwouldtravelouttoSunnybrook,pickup Jimandbringhimhomeforaroastbeefdinner andagameofcribbage.“Ithinkofhimwhenever IsmellacigarorhaveanOrangeCrush,”says Anne.AndwhenaskedifsheknewofJim’searly involvementwithinsulin,sheanswersyes:“I wouldnotbealiveifnotforthediscovery.”

Coincidentally,theson,Lloyd,workedatthe ChristieStreethospitalsitewhenitbecameacityownedlong-termcarefacilityaftertheveterans’ departure.Formanyyears,hewasabookkeeper there,managingfinancialaccountsfortheresidents.Everyyear,he’dtakehischildrentothe cornerofChristieandDuponttowatchtheSanta ClausParadegoby,andthenthefamilywouldgo forhotchocolateinthecafeteriawhereJimand theotherpatientshadoncetakentheirmeals.

Ididn’tdrown.Itwasn’twater.Unlessthecloudscount. Iwasbuckled(dryinsidebolted-metalwallsandPlexiglas) andflyingfromFrederictontoWhitehorseinasnowstorm. *** Decemberdark:outofYVRinaconnectingAirbus. HalftheGinBuckfromaplastichighballcupspills tryingtogettomylips.

GreysonScale:Forgiveness REBECCAFREDRICKSON

GeistShortLong-DistanceWritingContest

Thereweremaybefifteenofus.Somethinghadmalfunctionedwiththechemicalsthatmorning.Oureyes tingled.Ourarmsclaspedkickboardsandourlegshung, half-bent.

Then,touchingandfumblingalongthefloorwithbare hands,Ifindaplatform,astage.Halogenfloodsmeandthe world(360ºandall-seeing)is,tome,utterlyobscured.Ona platform,Iamseen.Iamwell-litfromeveryfloodedangle.

Peoplerubbedtheireyesandplacidlykickedindifferent directions,driftingaroundlikelakeicecrackingapart. Thesefifteenwhohadbreachedtheveil,returned,now floatingincrookedlinesoverbendinglight.

can’tcall.Icecubesfallontomyjeans.Myeyelidssting fromthehistamine.Iamgraspingfor,bunchinginmyfist, thesleeveoftheonenexttome.

He’swearingabombermadeofsomesilkyfabric.His sandyhaircurlsandrecedesatthetemples.Heplanstosay, todo,somethingwhenwe’realoneunderluminousgreen cracks.

TheyhadalltheseNDEersinaswimmingpoolbecause somanyneardeathsinvolvewater—andnotjustthe drownings.Awomanondeck,atthefive-footmark,asked ustopicturethemomentweleftourbodiesandfoundsome unearthlyworld.

“Isawmyfather,”saidthemanbesideme.“Hewasan infantinthemouthofabluespiral.”

Theplatformisinapool.Isomersaultintothewaterat thefive-footmark,thedrop-off,andhitmyheadonthe edge. Ifeelmywaywithonebarefoottothisedge,andIsee awomanglowingintheworld’sdarkness.“Thewitchisin fortea,”shesays.

Shemeansme,meansthatIamthewitch.Igaspwater. Iamseenonthisstageandthisstageislandingbetween smallpurplemountains,killingtheliftinYXY.

RebeccaFredricksonisawriter,teacherandvisualartist.Herwork hasappearedintheanthology AgainstDeath:35EssaysofLiving (AnvilPress).SheworksatThompsonRiversUniversityandlives inWilliamsLake,BC,locatedonthetraditionalanduncededterritoryoftheT’exelcemcwithinSecwépemc’ulucw.

Paramedicsgapeatthegate.Theyseeme.Thescreens onthewallsseeme,andtheyseemebackinNewBrunswickonscreensoftheirown—me,inthesewhitesheets andnorthernlights—theyseemeandwave.Theyknow whereIam(andhowandwhyIcame),andeverythingis goingtobeokay.

WinnersoftheOccasional

Behindme,peanutsspillfromZiploctopalm.Theitch andclampatthebackofmymouth.Ireachforabuttonbut

NotanothersoulknowsIamflying.Notanother,except themanwhowillstandinarrivals.Isawhimlastin2003, butIknowthatheparksatthemeter,paysnothing,and leaveshisNissanrunning.

***

38Geist119Winter2021 38Geist119Winter2021 TRAVELLIT FIRSTPRIZE

TravelLit39 SECONDPRIZE Fidelity BILLENGLESON

Youdrinkenoughbeer,andthefloorisn’tsobad.Wehadshekels enoughforamotelbutournewbuddy,Charles,offeredus tolerableaccommodation.Lonniegotthecouch.Igotthe airmattress.Thatwasamoment.Mywell-oiledbodyloved thatairmattress.

1969–TWODAYSLATER

Splurgedonatrainride.Safer.Easier.Lonniesaid,“Ican’t leaveheragain.”Travellingcompanions.Menoftheroad. HarpoonedinWinnipeg.Tooyoung.Inmyhead,Iwasoff

toCuba.HelpCastrobringinthecrops.Norealplan.Justa bigfatdream.CarolineandPatwerefriendsoffriends.Caroline andTrishwereoncesimpatico.Trishwasacey-deucy.Sexually, Imean.Isthattheterm?Anyways,Carolinesaid,“Sure,bunk in.Lovetohaveyou.”Alittleapartmentaboveagrocerystore. YongeSt.Noairmattress,though.Apulloutcouch.Iadapted. Beggarscan’tbe…canthey? 2020 IcouldcountthenumberofyearsifIhadenoughfingers.My littlejoke.Theyearscountthemselves,don’tthey?They’re relentless. 1969–SUMMER Icouldn’tseemtofindmyfeetinTO.Aimless,Isuppose. Lazy.EarlyAugust,CandTleftforWoodstock.Hadthe placetomyself.Theysaid,“Comewithus.It’llbeablast.” Isaid,“SavingtogotoCuba.” Thatwasabiglie. Ilingeredon.InOctober,Iheadedbacktothecoast. Stoppedoffinsoon-to-beWinterpeg. “Lonnie’sgone,”Dorawailed.“HeleftmeforCubaa monthago.” Shelookedbroken. 2020 LonnieandIkeepintouch.Close,butdistant,youknow. NeverquiteadjustedtoDoraandme.Hereshecomes.Bringingmemyeveningtea.Betterwrapthisup,payhersome attention. BillEnglesonisaretiredchildwelfaresocialworker.Hewritesfiction, non-fictionandpoetry.Heistheauthorofthenovel LikeaChild toHome andthecollectionofessays ConfessionsofanInadvertentlyGentrifyingSoul (SilverBowPublishing).Helivesat engleson.caandonDenmanIsland,BC.

WherewasI?

ThebestthingIcouldsayaboutLonnie’sbeaterwasthatit wasdemolitionderbyworthy.Andthat’sbeingkind.Anearly fiftiesAustin.OraHillman.Britjobbie,anyways.Burned oillikeatrampsteamer.Conkedoutintheprettylittletown ofWolseley.Wedumpedheronthemaindrag,scurriedback toHighway1,andhitchedourwaytothePeg.Lonnieknew achick.Pardonme—ayoungwoman.Dora.Figuredwe’d crashatherplace.Catchabuswhenweweregoodandready. OncewesettledintoDora’sdigs,itturnedoutLonniewouldn’t begoodandready.Theyhadhistory.Firstkiss.Agetwelve. Hewas—shewasthirteen.Olderwomanbluesclungtohim likeacobweb. 2020 Iwatchthetravelshowsthesedays:BeachfrontHullabaloo, thatsortofshow.Seasidecondos.Getawayplaces.Evenduringthispandemic,peoplearetryingtogetaway.Notme. Once,maybe.Cuba.

Clearasavirus.Clearasmemory.

2020 Ihaven’tmovedfromthischairinfifteenyears.Hyperbole, eh!ButIspendatonoftimehere.Pouringoutreminiscences. Bitsandpieces.Moments.Can’tbelievetheyhavekeptsowell. It’sallsoclear.

1969–ADAYLATER

1969–TABER

“I’vegotworktonight.Sanchoneedshispillatsix.He hastotakethemtwelvehoursapart,remember?It has tobe atsix.”

Davedoesnotlookupfromhistomatoplant.“Shoot.” Afterfloodingtheplanter,heswapsthewateringcanfora pairofshearsfromthedustypatiotableandtrampsacross theyardtosnipawayataraspberrybush,whichhasbowed tothesun.

“Ineedyoutodosomething,”shesays,inthepresent, wheresunshinepeltsabrownishbackyard,andalawn sprinklerspurtsdoggedly.

Jacindapullsabattery-poweredalarmclockfromher purseandslamsitonthepatiotable.“Isetthisforsix.You don’thavetolookatit.Youdon’tevenhavetothinkabout it.Allyouhavetodoishearthealarm,goinside,andgive Sanchohismedicine.”

“Alright,”shesays.“What’sitgonnatake?Cookies? Pie?” Dave’seyesflashupward. “Pieitis,”Jacindasays. “Saskatoonberry?”

“ButthenI’ll know whattimeitis,whichdefeatsthe wholepoint.” “Thewholepoint.”Jacinda’sbackprickleswithsweat. “It’samatterofprinciple. Principle,Jace.Everybody’s gotsomewheretobe.Everybody’srushing.”Davewaveshis trowelthroughtheair,hurlingclodsofpale,overbaked earthashespeaks.“Everybody’skeepingtime,butnobody’s gotany.Explainthatonetome.”

Abassethoundlumbersthroughtheopenbackdoor, earsandbellyfatswinging,andtuckshimselfbeneaththe table.Hiseyesarecloudy,hiskneesdistended.AfisttightensaroundJacinda’sheart.

Jacindadonsacoolexpression,aveilbetweenherandher husband,andtimeuncoils.Sheistwenty-threeagain,scuttlingintoaSaskatchewancourthouseinpinkeyeshadowand aweddingdressonemightguesswasmadeofmascarpone cheese.Thememoryleavesasourtaste.

WhenDaverenouncedworking,healsorenounced time.Heobliteratedhiswatchwithahammer.Hecovered themicrowaveclockwithhockeytape.Hebeganeschewingsocialinvitations,insistingthatin his timezone,Dave StandardTime(DST),nobodymadeplans.

THIRDPRIZE

Yes,shethinks. Yes,Ido.“Thisisaboutourdog.” “ButIdon’tbelieveinanyofthat.”

MorganDickhasbeenafinalistfor Room magazine and Alberta Views’ fictioncontests.Hernon-fictionwritinghasappearedin the GlobeandMail andCBCNews.Shewasselectedasan apprenticeforthe2022Writers’GuildofAlbertaMentorshipProgramandiscurrentlyworkingonanovel.ShelivesinCalgary.

DaveStandardTime(DST) MORGANDICK

40Geist119Winter2021

“Jacinda,girl.Youknowme,”Davesays,andhalfthe raspberrybushamassesathisfeet.

Jacinda,whofollowsMountainDaylightTime(MDT), breathessomecalmintohervoice.“I’daskJoe”—thenextdoorneighbour,asinewy,widowedcarpenter,sometimes offershissawdustedshoulderforJacindatocryon—“but he’souttonight.Mysistercan’tcome.There’snobody else.”ShebeamsasolderinglookatthebackofDave’s head.Hestillhasnotmethereye.Instead,hefindsatrowel andscoopssoilfromtheflowerbedfornoapparentreason.

“Don’tforgetthetimer,”hecallsafterher.“Youalways leaveitintoolong.”

Jacindacan’tbelieveit’scometothis.“Saskatoonberry,” shesays,andturnsonherheel.

ofbeinganarchetypeofhumanpotential

“Boo.”Shesmacksthechequewiththebackof herhandandshovesitintoherapron,sweeping thepocketuntillocatingachocolatebar.

Yearsago,Mrs.Humphreysstink-eyedmewhen Ididn’ttakeoneofherVictoriaDaychocolates.It’s notthatIdon’tlikechocolate,butshewassinging EarthenVessel atthetopofherlungs—andwiththe oppositelookonewouldexpect,lesslikeenraptured joyandmorelikethattimeUncleRodrigo’sorgans contractedallatonceafterhegotbackfromVegas.

SHORTSTORY

Don’tWorry,LeonardoHasaPlan

Ihatetosayit,butDarlene’ssortofsupersad. Onething’sforsure,I’llneverbeDarlene,workingthisjobforthenextmillennium.BecauseI’m perpetuallyself-improving,gettingreadyforthe realworld,forwhenI’moutofhighschool.SimilartoLeonardodaVinci,whotaughthimselfto juggletofocusthemind-body.Fromthatfoldout IreadinNan’sWonderlandofKnowledgeencyclopedias:DaVinci,“anarchetypeofhuman potential.”ThisiswhyIneverwritedownmy customers’orders.UnlikeDarlene,they’recommittedtomemory,thusfreeingtheorderpadfor observationsaboutchocolatebarstealingand generalhumanity.

Paternoster’sbichonsfrisésescapesintothe kitchen,puttingthesuspiciononDarlene,theonly otherdaywaitress.

GettingdrunkattheGoldenFleeceistheopposite

Yeteveryoneiswillingtoignoreallthatduring theSundayseafoodbuffet.OnSundays,Paternoster’strainedthemtotrotinwithnapkinsintheir mouths.Hestandsatthekitchendoorandclaps themofftheirnestwadofhairytableclothsandinto thediningroominaneatlinewheretheycirclethe tablesanddaintilydropnapkinsintothehandsof eachcustomer.Everyonelovesthis,evenMrs. Humphreys.

Itakeoutmyorderpadandpen.

Darleneisgivingherpaychequethefinger again.“HonesttoGod,”shesays.“Whata bunchofshit.”Iwatchherflipthepaychequeoff hardlikeit’sasleazyface.“Uh-uh-uh,”shegrunts witheachmiddle-fingerjab.

Paternoster’sbichonsarestrictlyforbiddenin therestaurant.Peoplearoundherespendalotof timetalkingaboutthis:dogsshouldbeleftoutside;dogsaredirty;dogsdon’tknowhowtostop barking,orwhimpering,orlickingtheirballs.

42Geist119Winter2021

Fadedwrapper,likelystolenfromtheglass displaycaseunderthecashregister.

Darleneissobossy.Furthermore,she’salways tellingmemybreakisup.LastIchecked,Darlene, yourwordisn’tlaw.OfcourseI’mnotaboutto arguewithamiddle-finger-thrustingadult.Instead, I’llputanotherDarlenecomplaintinthesuggestionbox,cleverlydisguisingmyownhandwriting. OrI’llunlockthedogflapgoingintothebuffet areaandfeigninnocencewhenoneofMonsieur

DarlenesaidthatPaternosteroriginallythought thenapkindeliverywouldbeawayto warmlocals

“Christ,Nancy,”Darlenesays.“Yourfifteen’sup.”

K’ARIFISHER

We’releaningagainstthewallbesidetheoutsidewashrooms.Darlene’seyesskipblanklyfrom oilstaintooilstainacrossthecrackedparkinglot assheunwrapsherchocolate.Gator-skinned,the truckerscallit.Iwatchherslidethebarin,not evenbotheringtosnapthesquaresoffatthe grids.Shesighsthroughhernose,nostrilsflaring, deep-suckingchocolateoffherteeth.

Likethisishome?I’dthought.TheFleece hasthesamebig-rigwallpaperasalittle brother’sbedroom.There’sashelfabovethe faux-woodpanellingwheremodeltruckswith stutteringtaillightsarepluggedintoanoverloadedextensioncord.It’safull-servicestop, whichmeansthatbehindtherestaurantand pumps,awayfromthegroanofair-brakes,are ahalf-dozenprivatebedroomsattachedto

Right—asif Darlene haseverbeento France. * IstartedworkingattheGoldenFleeceamonth ago,atthebeginningofsummerbreak.The firstthingDarlenetoldmewashowshecan alwaystellagoodwaitressbyhereyes.Theeyes shouldneverbestill;evenwhenyou’retalking theyshouldberovingforalowcoffeecupor anemptyplate.Andyouhavetopick,shesaid— butnopickingwithmyregulars.Shehaddibs onahandfuloftruckerswhomadetheweekly run.Mostlong-haulersarelonely,shesaid,get asmileandpickwiththem—youknow,putyour handontheirshoulderandmakethemfeellike it’snicetoseethemagain,likethisishome.

sharedbathroomsdecoratedwithpinupsof womeninfrayedjeanshortsandbikinitops standingbycabswithsprunghoods.Mindyou, thelacycurtainsareahomeytouch—likea grandma’shouse.IfiguretheFleeceisprobablymorelikeafantasyhomefortruckers.But Darleneisright,mostofthemlooklikethey couldusealittlecheeringup.

* L ater thateveningI’msittingonapatchof grassbythegarbagebinsonmybreakand IoverhearDarlenetalkingtoWarren.Sheisso obvious—leaningagainstPump4andliterally adjustingherbrastraps.EveryoneknowsPaternosterhatesitwhenWarrenisdistracted.My firstdayhetoldmethepumpswerethemoneymakersandtherestaurantoperatesmainlyoff gasprofits.Yetthere’sDarlene,messingwiththe guymanningthepumps.AndWarren,onlybeing polite.Althoughtherearesomeobservations: Warrenshiftinghiswiener,butprivately,when heturnstoflickthemetervalve. Itakeoutmyorderpadandpencil. Warren hotforDarlene? “She’snoGinaVanderham,”Darlenesays. GinaleftforcollegeinJune.She’stalking aboutmeagain,Gina’sreplacement.It’sso obviousDarlenefocusesonthewrongstuff.

Photos:Diptych#2,2017,VisitorsInformationbyMorrisLum.

ShortStory43 uptohavingdogsintherestaurant.“InFrance, dogsareundereverytable,”shesaid.“Sometimestheyevengettheirownchairanddish, likechildren.”

IsearchWarren’sface.Whocouldeverbe hotforDarlene?Darlenewithhercornyfeet, whoobviouslythrowsheruniforminthelaundrywiththenametagstillattached,whose breakisoverandnowbleedingintomine.

Darleneletsabadtipruinherwholeday,rolls hereyeswhenIspendamicrosecondatthe pick-upwindowtryingtobalancethreeplates ononearm,yetconsumestwohoursadayrubbingherfeetbesidethemilkshakemaker.

Forthenexttwohourssheservedtables whilegrowling“shroomshroom”andpretendingtobeaneighteen-wheelerclimbingasteep incline,pickingherregularsintoweaksmiles.

“Whattheeff,”Darlenehadsaidafter returningfromthetowerforhersmoke break.“Howthehellarewesupposedtowork inthisenvironment?”

t’sbeenamonthsincehe’schangedthefry oil,”Darlenesaysasshesniffsthecook’s stationandIloadthedishwasher.She’sconvincedPaternoster’slaunderinghismoney. “Whatelsecouldhebedoingwithit?He’sobviouslynotusingittopayus.He’ssendingitback toFrance.Tosomeoverseasbankaccount.”For therestoftheday,moneylaunderingisallDarlenetalksabout. “WhoeverheardofaFrenchierunninga truckstopanyway?”

“ButwhoelseisPaternostergoingtogetto workthisdump?”hervoiceclearoverthereefer truckscycling.Latelyshe’sbeentakingmore verbalchances,becausePaternoster’smade somechanges.Hecleanedoutthepantryand whentheseafoodtruckrolledin,unloadeda largetankofmurkywater.Atfirstitlookedlike atankofoldshoes,butinsideweretwolethargiccarp.Acoupledayslater,afreakishlythin mannoonehadeverseenbefore,wearinga bandanaandrubberbootsclonkedinwitha blackgarbagebagfullofwildmushrooms. Paternostertookthemoutbacktodryonanold bedsheetbehindthebulkpropanerefilltower.

“Theydon’thavetruckdriversinFrance?” Iask. “What?ThehellshouldIknow.”Sheglares atme.“TheGoldenFleece,whatkindofa nameisthatanyway?Knowwhatthisplace shouldbecalled?BoneDaddies.That’sthe typeofnamethatspellssuccess.”

I’mcashingoutwhileshe’slayingdown menusatanewtableandIhearhersay, “WelcometoBoneDaddies,howcanIget youstarted?”

44Geist119Winter2021Photos:Diptych#3,2017,VisitorsInformationbyMorrisLum.

“I

henextmorningDarleneandIaretaking trashouttotheDumpsterwhenadustytaxicabpullsuptoPump3.Firstoff,wheredida cabcomefrom?Secondoff,couldthewoman unloadingsuitcasesbePaternoster’swife?

Paternosterwhistles.Thedogsreelaround thecorner,powder-puffed,earsliftinginthe breezeoftheirtear-ass,pinkbowties,tongues lollinginthedryheatofsummer,alleyes trainedonMadame—untiloneofthemtrips overalooseflapofgatorskinandgoesdown. “Non,non,non,”MadamePaternosteryells, runningover.Shescoopshimupandshoots Monsieuramurderouslook.

Shewearslongsilkyjacketsthatwaft behindherasshetopsupcoffeecupsandhums oldshowtunes.It’sonlybeentwoweeksand alreadyshe’sorderednewuniformsandrewrittenthemenu,addingitemslike Steakaujus. Everyonehasheardabouttheimprovements,

“Jesus,Louis,”Madamesaysunderher breath,hereyesstillfixedonthesheep.She blinksheavilyandturnstowardstheroad:the bare,single-lanearterythatlinkstheFleece withtherestoftheworld,theexpectantraptorssquattingonpowerlinesscanningthe ditchforroadkill.“Wherearemydogs?”

ShortStory45

FREEBREAKFASTWITH100GALMINIMUM;the blinkingarrowonthesideoftheroadpointing tothetwelve-foot-tallsheepcoveredin chippedgoldfoil.Shelingersmomentarilyon thesheep’shead—anerodedoblongonto whichtwouneveneyeswerethicklypainted.

Darleneshouldjustgetanotherjob.Stuck inajobshehates—andweallknowhowthat happens:theworldpoopsonyou.Andthen youspendtherestofyourlifesquirmingfor freedombecauseworld-poopislikequicksand. Quicksand,theruthlessnessofnature,the moreyoustrugglethestrongeritsucksyou down.

“Bonjour,”thewomansaysasshewalksup tothedoor.“Hello.”

“Weknowwhatbonjourmeans,”Darlene says. Madamelooksatherappraisingly.Ishould warnhernottomesswithDarlene.Shehasn’t seenherfinger-jabs,orthewayshecanmake yourlifemiserablewhensheshowsupinthe morningstillalittlepickledandtheneatsan entirepieàlamodewhilecallingeveryoneshe workswithadipshit.JustthenPaternoster emergesfromthebuilding,hishairslickedinto anewwave.

MadameisstaringattheTravelPlazasign thatadvertisesgaspumppricesinnumerals withseveralsegmentsburntout;thefaded

Oneday,whilevacationing,quicksandison theto-dolist.TheexactlocationwhereXena WarriorPrincesswasshot,thescenewhereshe saveshertrustedsidekickfromperil.Beinga warriorprincessisalotlikebeinganarchetype ofhumanpotential,likeLeonardo.Xenahad puremortalbloodstatus;allittookwassome martialartstrainingandamoralone-eighty whenshedecidedshenolongerwantedtobea power-hungrywarlord.Allthoseslavegirlsshe savedfromassureddoom. Itakeoutmyorderpadandpencil. SeethatgirlatTable5playingwiththe straw?Shelovesthatstrawbecauseit remindsherofherpetrabbitathomewho isachronicpotsmoker.Everytimeshe triestotellherrabbittoquitsmokingpot, hesaystoher—Youneedtorelax,maybe youwantahittoo?Taketheedgeoff?But therabbitdoesn’tknowanybetter;his parentshadperpetualglaucomaandthey essentiallyhot-boxedthecaveuntilthepet rabbitwasaddictedbeforehecouldeven hop.Thelittlegirlhasnofriendsbecause herparentsliveinthewoodsandonly comeintotownonceamonthtobuybags ofpowderedmilkanddriedbeans.They leaveheralonealldaysotheycanpick rocksthattheysellforfivecentsabag. Onedayshestealsthatbongandusesit forsomethingmorepracticalthanhotboxingarabbit.Sheusesitforscience.She usesitforprogress.Leonardodidn’teven havebongs,allhehadwereinsightsinto theinternalorgans.Sheattachesgears andavacuumandmakesitintoarobot thatcrusheslonelinessoratleastpicks rockswhileeveryonerelaxes.

* ThetruckersloveMadamePaternoster.

Don’tworryTable5,Leonardohasaplan!

Photos:Diptych#1,2017,VisitorsInformationbyMorrisLum.

Darlene’sjustpissedbecauseherpickingis nolongereffective.InthepresenceofMadame Paternoster,Darlene’spickingmakesherregularssigh;theireyesblinkslowerthanusual, whereastheyfollowMadamefromtherimof theircoffeecups.

Gettingdrunkatworkisdefinitelythe oppositeofbeinganarchetypeofhuman potential.SheturnsthespigotontheSunset Blushboxtorefillhercupandapurplesplash hitsthecarptank.

DarleneblamesMadamefortheshittytips she’sbeengetting,butshehas been shittylately. Shedoesn’tbotherworkingonMadame’slaminateddutychecklistsandinsteadslumpsover thecashregisterduringtheafternoonlull, lightingherZippooverandoveronher forearm. * Acoupleweekslater,thePaternostersarein townputtinganadinthepaperforanother daywaitresswhenDarleneaccidentallyspillsa milkshakeonthecounterandwipesitbackinto thecupwithherhand.Sheslamsitdownin frontofArjun,oneofherbettertippers.He

andtherestauranthasbeencrammed.

Darlenekeepssayinghow“aujus”isjust Bistoinstantgravymixandhowcouldeveryone besofrickin’moronicandMadameHooch-ass shouldbasicallyaurevoir.Shehasn’tevenbotheredtowearthenewuniformandcontinuesto comeinwiththesamegreasedonewiththe nametagbarelyhangingon.

I’minthebackrefillingthecoffeepotwhen Ihearacrashinthepantryandsomeloud cursing.IcautiouslyopenthedoortoDarlene, slumpedinthecornerdrinkingSunsetBlush.

“Justlookatme,”shesays,spreadingher armswidesoIcandigestthewholepicture. “It’sthatfuckingdouchewadJulio.Haveyou metmyman?R.E.S.P.E.C.T.,showyouwhat itmeanstome.”Sheholdsouthermug, “Slurp?”

“Heusedtobesonice.HaveIevertoldyou aboutMaylongweekendsinOswagootchie? Oswagootchiebythecoast?Allthatfreshair thatmadeusgosavage?Isweartogodthere wasonceatimewhenthatmanwouldgrabmy assoutoftheblue.Once,wewerehittingit

46Geist119Winter2021

readsLouisL’Amourwhileheeatsandstacks histiplooniesinaneatpilebyhisplate.Hissignature,Darlenecallsit.OnceDarleneleftthe looniesbalancingforanafternoonjusttoseeif therumblefromaRockyMountainDouble Rollerwouldknockthemoverwhenitpulled intothepumps.Forthepasthourshe’sbeen poppinginandoutofthepantryfornoreason.

Momworkslaundryatthehospitalbut latelyshe’sbeenstiffedshiftsbyherbulljive boss.Icouldneverimagineworkinginthat bleachhole,spendingalldaystuffingpuke sheetsandpeesheetsandshitsheetsintothe industrialwasher.Momwasonceprobably good-looking,butnowwhenyoulookather allyouseeistheyearsofbacterialsanitizerand nervousexhaustion.

ShortStory47 hardandthislittleyellowbirdlandedbesideus andchirped,andJuliostoppedbecausehe didn’tthinkitwasrighttokeepbanging becauseitwaspervertingnature.”

NowwelivewithUncleDwayne,Nanand cousinTippy.Andit’snotNan’sfaultshecan’t runaroundafterTippyalldaybecauseshehad fivekidsofherownanddoesn’tfeelinclinedto doitalloveragain—especiallynotforalittle bratwhotakesoffandgetshisfootcaughtin thefloorboardsofMr.Boyjack’sexpensive machineryshedthatBoyjacksworewaslocked andhowdoesasixyearoldknowhowtopick alock,anyway?Well,I’lltellyou,it’sfromhis UncleDwaynewho’sbeenonunemployment sincebeingrunoverbyadumptruckand bloodsquirtedoutofhiseyesandnowheisn’t abletoseefaraway,onlycloseupandsomehow,heswearstogod,thismakeshiseyes especiallyexcellentforthingslikelockpicking.

“I’mreallykillingthiswine,”Darlenesays, lookingintohercup.“Newdaywaitresses,” shemutters.“Thisplaceusedtobegreat.”She poursanotherdrink.

Idon’twanttohearaboutOswagootchie. “Butyoulovethemnomatterwhat,amI right?” MomusedtoreminiscelikethisbeforeDad leftanditalwaysmademenervous.

* ThenextdayDarlenecomesinafulltenminutesearlyforhershift,blurry-eyedandpale. Forthefirsttime,she’swearinghernewuniform withthetruckairbrushedacrosstheback.Her nametag’sonstraight,andnottheoldonebut theMadame-inspiredversionwithDarlene archedaboveatinysheep. Shedoesn’tevenbotherworkingfrontof houseandinsteadspendsherentiremorning pluggingquartersinthejukebox,washing downPeptowithcoffeeandsingingalongto “Barracuda”asshepeelsabouttwentypounds ofpotatoesformashwithoutcomplaining. Madamedoesn’tnoticetheDarlenetransformation.She’sspentthemorningwiththe dogs,conceptualizinganewSundaybuffet half-timeshow.

IpretendI’minthepantryonlytofetcha boxofbutterpatsandleave.Flirtingwith Warrenishowyougetstuckwaitressingatthe Fleecefortherestofyourlife,Darlene. Ahalf-hourlaterandshe’soverbyfluids usingthebug-washtowertoholdherself uprightwhileWarren’sonthepayphonetrying tofindsomeonetopickherupbeforethePaternostersreturn.FinallyajackedToyotaskidsin. Amanclimbsout,grabsDarlenebythearm andleadsherintothecab.Twokidsdangletheir armsoverthesideofthetruck’sbox.Whenthe

“Youknow,”shesays,suddenlyonherfeet. “YoushouldhitthatWarren.”

truckscreechesout,theylifttheirarmsandroll backinwiththemomentum. Itakeoutmyorderpadandpencil. SeethatyoungmanatTable6?Heis havingasecretloveaffairwithanolder mermaid.Theworldisyouroyster,shetold him;youcanhaveanythingyouwant, includingme.Itseemedlikeagooddeal. Hehadamotherwhoneverhuggedhim. Shewasbornwithoutanyarms.Andisit themermaid’sfaulttheOceanKingdoesn’t loveheranymoreandinsteadpokesher withhispitchforkwhenevershecomesnear? BythetimeherealizestheKinghireda hitman,it’stoolate.Theywerefoundin herclambed,notaplushpinkone,butan oldgreyrubberyonesimilartothose currentlydrowninginMadame’scarpy “mothersauce”inthebuffet. “Help,”theyoungmancries,buttheonly thingsthatcomeoutofhismouthare bubbles.Somebubblesarelethargic,he notes,whileothersareangryorgreasyor slim.Hiscuriosityhasbeenjolted!He harnessestheangryonesandusesthemto fightneglect.Oratleastfloathimselfout oftheoystershellandawayfromthe King’shitman. Don’tworryTable6,Leonardohasaplan!

stainedsheetsstolenfromthehospitalorpretendtolikeUncleDwayne’sjokesorremovea disgustingpackratdenfromunderNan’s trailerorwatchCousinTippyeatHotPockets orpretendIdon’thearMommutteringand cryinginherbedroom. AllI’llhavetodoisthink. * Laterathome,it’sjustMomandUncle DwayneandTippy.UncleDwayne’ssprawled onthesofawiththedogathisfeet,watching SundayBeatdown.He’sgothisshirtyankedup andasmuglookonhisfacelikehe’sjustinvented penicillin.He’spouringsaltintohisbellybutton touseasadip-holeforhiscelerysticks.

It’sdecided,I’mgoingtobuildsomething forthedogshow. * Itmakesmepensive,thisdecisiontomake somethingfortheshow.Fortherestofmy shift,I’mdistractedasIbustablesandtake orders.Ileanonthecounterbythetillandwatch peoplechewandimaginethempointingatmy inventionandwhispering, Thisshallbendparadigms.Ismileserenelyatmyselfinthepie-case glasslikeIwouldatthecrowd,Iamatyourservice; mybraindispensedtoallhumanity.WhenIfocus backonthefloor,there’sacustomerburningat me,pissedbecauseIscrewedup.

There’saminiatureFleeceandthegraveyardbyUncleRodrigo’strailerandthehouses thatleadtothehighway,theboarded-uppost office,andderelictsubdivisionbyChinaNose Mountain.

“Tricksareimportantfordogs,”Madame says.“Mentalstimulationequalsaricherlife experience.”

“Whatdoyouthinkitis?”sheasks. Slumpedagainstthebuilding,itdoesn’tlook muchlikeawagon.Thewoodenslatsandthe stretchedcanvastarppaintedbrownmakeit

48Geist119Winter2021

Ispendalleveningworkingonmywagon, deeplyinvolvedwitheachdetailfromthe wheelstothepotsandpanssecuredwithrivet nailstothebed.EventuallyIfallasleepwith myheadontheworkbenchandwakeupearly withpaintchipsstucktomycheek. * IpullintotheFleecewiththewagonbungeed totherattraponmybikeandpropitagainst thesideofthebuilding.I’monmyfirstbreak whenIrunintoMadamecrouchingbesideit, pokingitcautiouslywithastick.

“It’snotthattheydon’tlikedogs.It’sthe pioneeringinfluenceofthiscountry,”shesays. “Theearlyémigré.Peopleherethinkdogsare forwork.”Shehadaseriesofcostumes designedforthebichons.Someofthemhave feltedminer’shatsthattieunderneaththechin whiletheothersarewearingstarchedwhite bonnetsandribbonsintheirears.Madame traineddogsforalivinginFrance,mostlyfor televisionbeforeshebranchedintosomething calledFrenchRingSport.IwatchBruno doggie-danceonhishindlegs,yipssqueezing fromhisdelicatejawswitheachtinyhop.She tellsmehowtrainingbuildstheirconfidence andmakestheminteractbetterwiththeir environment.

I’vedecidedtobuildachuckwagonforthe dogshow,whichisbasicallyamodern-day single-axleEurotrailer.Thedogs,intheir bonnets,canpullitbehindthemwithlittle leashes.

It’sexactlylikethatfoldoutfromNan’s WonderlandofKnowledgeencyclopedias.And thisiswhenIseeit:Xenaandhersidekick straininginthequicksandandthebichonsin thetreesbarking—notinahystericalway,but inacommunicativeway.They’rebarkingouta plantolowervinesdowntothequicksandby passingthemone-by-onewiththeirmouths. Leonardoistheretoo,withhisbacktomy mind’seye,buildingalevermechanismusing ananimaltuskandacoconut,histunicblowingoutbehindhimduetotheinherentbreeze ofhisbrainpower.

IgrabasnackandwalktoNan’sshopnext door.Hershopisfullofstuffsheuseswhen shecontractsanartisticoutbreak.Lately,she’s beenworkingonascalemodeloftheneighbourhood.There’sapieceofplywoodonthe workbenchwhereshe’spavedaminiatureroad andformedtreesfrompinebitsandthemud bogbyPaulinglookslikerealmudbutit’s actuallySmooth-on.

ButIfigureit’sirrelevantinthelargerpictureandIofferhimacomplimentarypieceof pie.Thisistemporary,becausesoonI’llhave scholarshipsandletmyhairgofull-Einstein andI’llneverhavetododishesorsleepon

Photos:Diptych#4,2017,VisitorsInformationbyMorrisLum.

SeethatmanatTable9?Theonewiththe tightsuspendersandthehairsburntoffhis forearmsandhishandsrestingonhis roundstomach.Hestaresatthatstomach asifpatientlywaitingforittoanswera question.Usuallythesetruckersarejittery intherestaurant,liketheydon’tgetthe valueinsittingwithoutrolling.Butthis manhasbeensearchingforsomethinghis wholelife.Itwassomethinghis grandmotherlostwhenshebentdownto scratchherleg.Itrolledintotheditch,but whichditchwasneverdocumentedbecause theitemwassovaluableshecroaked immediatelyduetoremorse.

ShortStory49 appearlesslikeawagonandmorelikealoafof breadwithwheels.

“Merde.Diditgetrunoverbyasemi hauler?”Shekneelsandgentlyjabsitwithher fingerasiftowakeitfromanap.“Maybe Louiscanfixit,”shesighs. Itakeoutmyorderpadandpencil.

Don’tworryTable9,Leonardohasaplan!

* I’vebeenfindingithardertobeanarchetype ofhumanpotentialeversinceDarlenecame toworkwithaspray-paintedboulderintheback ofhertruck. “It’sagoldnugget,”shesaid.

“That?”Isay,shrugging.“Maybeoneofthe oilcrates?”

Nowthemanspendseveryweekendin ditcheswithhispointerstick,sifting throughchipbagsandtossedcigarettes. Oncehecameacrosstheloveofhislife sittingcross-leggedbuthedidn’t recognizeherbecausehehadjusthoisted arottentirefullofmouldandthoughthe sawacornerofhisgrandmother’sthing undertheseveredhandandsoiledunderwear. Onedayhecatchestrenchfootand despairwhilecrawlingintheditchnear thedumpwheretheteenagersparty.He becomesfeverish—feverishlyinventive. Andwhilesquattinghebeginsto investigatethescienceofwater.Heuses thistocalculatehowfarsomethingcan rollawaybeforeoneforgetsaboutit.

Thelightlengthensandglintsoffawindshield,flaringmomentarilybeforebeing absorbedbythedroppedsunvisorofaparked chickentransport.Sometimestheuniverse sendsyouasign,likewhenyou’reatthebeach andawhalebreaches. * It’sthedayoftheshowandmymagneticchit isoncleaningthewashroomsagain.Itakethe bucketsandtheyellowglovesandscoopthe pucksoutoftheurinals—thepastilles,Paternostercallsthem.EvenfromhereIcanhearthe cheersinthebuffetroomandMrs.Humphreys laughinghysterically.It’sthepartwhenLeoand Pierrejumpontothegoldnuggetandbarkout thefirstbarsto OldDanTucker.Chairsscreech backaseveryonestandstoapplaud. Ilookinthemirror.Mynametagiscrooked. There’sanothermirrorhangingonthewall oppositeandmyfacerepeatsitselfoverand overforeternity.IwonderifLeonardohadmirrorsandthatwashowhedreamedupperspective.Gettingfiredfromyourfirstjobisn’tbeing anarchetypeofhumanpotential.Ipullonthe gloves.WhatwouldLeonardodo?Hewasin worseplacesthanthemen’s—themorgue,for example.Iremovetheglovesandputthebucket onthefloor. Itakeoutmyorderpadandpencil. Seethatyoungwomaninthebathroom? Whoknowswhatshewilldo—maybe she’llgetsuckedintoworld-poopand inventanewsnorkelonthewaydown. Ormaybeshewillbecomea veterinarian’sassistantandweara stethoscope.Inthewaitingroom,she’ll feedthedogsbiscuitsandofferwordsof encouragement.Eventhoughtheyare weakandarthriticandonbucketsof medication,shewilllistentotheir flubberyheartsandtheywillsoundlike amoose’smatingcallbutshewillsmile likeit’sthebestmusicintheworld.Asif listeningtoalloflife’ssatisfyingsounds atonce:bottlespopping,firescrackling, rainonaroofwhengoingtosleep.With theirlasteffort,thedogswillthump theirtailsontheexaminationbedpaper coverandwiththeirrheumaticeyes,say: Youarespecial! Youarespecial! Youarespecial!

ShelivesinVictoria.

Sheisn’tevencomplainingaboutthemagneticchitboardwiththedaysoftheweekand everyemployee’ssmilingfacegluedtoeach stupidchit.It’sobviouslybecauseherchitisn’t oncleaningduty.Instead,it’spermanently stuckonfloormanager.Inwhatuniversedoes theFleeceneedafloormanager? * T

K’ariFisherhasbeenpublishedinthe Malahat Review, PrairieFire and RiddleFence.Herstory “MercyBeatriceWrestlestheNoose”wasnominated forthe2015JourneyPrizeandappearedinthe JourneyPrize anthology,publishedbyMcClelland andStewartandtheWriters’TrustofCanada. Sheiscurrentlycompletingashortstorycollection.

“Someone’sinlovewithyou,”Madame says.“C’estamour.”Shetossesanotherofmy commentsontothemessypileonthetable.

henightbeforetheshowMadameempties thesuggestionboxandthetwoofthem spendanhourlaughingoverthenotes.

50Geist119Winter2021

NowDarlenestrutsaroundtheplacespurtingnewideaslike,“Howaboutwechangethe sloganto Life’stooshortforaveragefood.Or,how aboutwenameamenuitem KingoftheRoad?” Andshekeepspettingthedogsandsnuggling themandgivingthemrandomFrenchnames thataremostlyEnglishnamespronounced withafakeFrenchaccent.

They’reloungingataboothwiththeirshoes off,squintingthroughthelacycurtainsatthe sunsetasitquiversofftheparkinglot.Ibutton mycoatasabrandnewInternationalLoneStar eighteen-wheelerpullsinwithpneumaticgrace: pearlyblueenamel,shinychromegastanks,a blushofrunninglighthoveringbelowlikea noontimeshadow.

“Anugget!”MadameexclaimedtoPaternoster. “Oh,happyday,”Paternosterreplied. Madameorderedhimtodragitintothebuffet roomandslideitunderthechafingdishes.

Image:WikimediaCommons

TheideologythatblewYugoslavia apartinthe1990s,shatteringa medium-sizedcountryintowhat wouldeventuallybecomesevensmall states,wasthatofracialdifference.In Bosnia:AShortHistory,NoelMalcolm writesthatmostscholarsbelievethe SerbsandCroatswhosettledtheterritorythatbecameBosniawhenstable Slavicpopulationsfirstsettledinthe

ReheatedRaces

52Geist119Winter2021

AFTERLIFEOFCULTURE

regionintheseventhcenturyissued fromthesamestock.Theyspokein waysthatweresufficientlysimilarthat untilthe1990s,Serbo-Croatianwas regardedasasinglelanguage.Today speakersofSerbian,Croatian,andeven BosnianandMacedonian,asserttheir identitiesasseparatelanguagesthat belongtodifferentethnicities.Little linguisticjustificationexistsforsuch distinctions.Theprevalenceofpeople ofsharedancestrywhoregardthemselvesasessentiallydifferentshould makeusquestiontheconceptofrace. AsaJamaican-Canadianbiologist said tome,“Therearenospeciesdifferences amonghumanbeings.”

ConstructingnewracesbyrenaminglanguagesisanoldEuropean habit.AftertheearlyMiddleAges,the Galicianlanguage,whenspoken southoftheMinhoRiver, becameknownasPortuguese, anditssouthernspeakers,by extension,becamePortuguese. TheDutchandtheFlemishare identifiedasdifferentpeoples, andthecommonlanguagethey speakgoesbydifferentnameson oppositesidesoftheborder,in ordertopropuptheprecarious nationalidentityofBelgium.By contrast,somepeopleofsimilar appearancespeakdifferentlanguages.Between1649and1652 someofmymaternalancestors joinedthetroopsoftheirneighbourinEastAnglia,OliverCromwell. TheyinvadedIrelandandslaughtered Irishpeasants;inresponse,mypaternalancestors,whowerethosepeasants,tooktothecountrysideofthe westofIrelandtowageguerrillawarfareagainsttheinvaders.Thesetwo peoples,whospokedifferentlanguages,perceivedeachotherasalien races;yetabasicDNAtestassimilates myEastAnglianandwesternIrish ancestriesintothesinglecategoryof “BritishIsles.”

STEPHENHENIGHAN Dividingandconqueringlocalpopulationsconfinesthemtomanageableadministrativeunits

WhenIwasagraduatestudent intheearly1990s,refugees fleeingthewarinformer YugoslaviabegantoarriveinEngland.Itoldanacquaintance,who hadgrownupinYugoslavia,that theguysittingnexttomeinone ofmyclasseswasBosnian.“Iwould callthataYugoslav,”shereplied. “Ifyou’vebeendrivenoutofyour hometownforbeingaMuslim,”I suggested,“itmaybeunderstandablethatyoudefineyourselfasa Bosnian,notasaYugoslav.”Insayingthis,Ididnotmeantodeny thetragedyofthedisintegration of Yugoslavidentity.Fromitsshaky outlinesinthepost-WWIKingdom ofSerbs,CroatsandSlovenes—atitle thatomittedBosnianMuslims,among otherethnicities—toitsmoreuncompromisingarticulationinMarshalTito’s socialistyetanti-SovietYugoslaviaof theColdWarera,theYugoslavidea representedanattempt,however authoritarian,creakyandflawed,to overcomeinterracialstrife.

ThehistorianDonaldR.Wright pointsoutthatEuropeancolonizers projectedtheirnationalismontoAfrica, parcellingpeoplewhoseidentitieshad beenfluidandfreeofrigidlydemarcated boundariesofterritoryorethnicityinto

InAfrica,itisstrikingthatmostofthe anti-colonialistmovementsthatcame topowerintheraciallymixedterrain ofsouthernAfrica—theAfricanNational CongressinSouthAfrica,theMPLA inAngola,FRELIMOinMozambique, SWAPOinNamibia—made multiracialismacentralplankoftheirpolitical ideologies.“Downwithtribalism!” SamoraMachel,thefirstpresidentof Mozambique,wouldshoutinhisspeeches repudiatingthecoloniallegacy.DuringtheObamapresidencyinthe UnitedStates,idealistsspokeofapostracialfuture,yetwithoutaddressing sufficientlythepersistenceofracebasedoppressionandviolence.There canbenopost-racialismwithoutanend toracialization.AsJoséMartíunderstood,inequalitywillalwaysreheatthe racesfoundinbookstores.Therecent collectivetraumaofcoexistingwitha UnitedStatespresidentwhosedominant creedwasracismmaycauseusto underestimatethespeedwithwhichwe areadvancingtowardsaworlddefined bymixing,inwhichmostidentitieswill becomplexandmingled,andeachsociety’schallengewillbetocreatesufficientopportunityforalltopreventa resurgenceofrace. StephenHenighan’smostrecentbookisthe novel TheWorldofAfter. HisEnglish translationoftheAngolanwriterOndjaki’s novel TransparentCity,originallypublishedbyBiblioasisin2018,isforthcoming inaBritisheditionfromEuropaEditions. Readmoreofhisworkatgeist.comand stephenhenighan.com.FollowhimonTwitter@StephenHenighan.

Earlydecolonizingmovementstook aimattheideologyofrace.JoséMartí,a nineteenth-centuryCubanpoetand journalist,attackedraceasadivisivefictionthatwouldhobbleindependent nations.Inhisgroundbreaking1891 essay“NuestraAmérica”(“OurAmerica”)MartícalledforaLatinAmerica inwhich,“Thereisnoracialhatred becausetherearenoraces.Feeble thinkers…reheatracesfoundinbookstores(recalientanlasrazasdelibrería,in theoriginal)whichtheobjectivetravellerandthesympatheticobserver seeksinvaininNature.Thesoul emanates,equalandeternal,from bodiesthatarediverseinformand colour.”JoséVasconcelos,theMinister ofEducationofrevolutionaryMexico inthe1920s,wroteaninfluentialbook entitled TheCosmicRace,inwhichhe positedthathumanismandsocialism wouldprevailwhentheworld’spopulationhadintermarriedtothepointof becomingasinglerace.Whilemy Bosnianclassmatemighthavereason todoubtthisoptimism,thewritingsof MartíandVasconcelossuggestthat SouthAmerica,CentralAmericaand Mexico,asregionswherethemajority ofthepopulationistheresultofracial mixingthathasoccurredinthelast fivehundredyears,havehistorical experiencesthatmaybeusefulto NorthAmericaandEuropeinour mixed-racefutures.

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“tribes.”Europeansinventedtheseethnicities,dividingandconqueringlocal populationsandconfiningthemtomanageableadministrativeunits,asthey imposedtheirconceptsofraceand nationonAfrica.Overtime,some Africansabsorbedthisideology.Speakers ofthethreemostwidelyusedBantulanguagesinAngola—Ovimbundu,KimbunduandBakongo—havebeen encouragedbysomeoftheirleadersto seetheirlinguisticdifferencesasequivalenttoimmemorialethnicfissures eventhoughtheirlanguagesarevery closelyrelatedandthethreecommunitiesassumedtheirpresentformsonly intheseventeenthandeighteenthcenturies,asaresultofpopulationtransfers andintermarriagecausedbyEuropean colonialism.AsinEurope,some Africansseethemselvesasdifferenteven whentheyspeakthesamelanguage.In Rwanda,theHutuandtheTutsi,whose assertionsofdifferencefuelledagenocidein1994,bothspeakKinyarwanda.

Significantly,theAJ1shitthe marketatatimeofcontradiction.In contrasttotheproliferationofnostalgicwarmovieswithawhitemale heroprotagonist,hiphopculture withitsurbansettings,Blackmasculinemotifs,andanti-policing/governmentlyricsmovedintothe mainstream.Awholenewgeneration ofwhiteyouthweresuddenlytaking theircuesfromandidolizingBlack menwhoweretheanti-heroestoJordan’sconsumerheroism.Statedotherwise,theirmissionwasnottomake theworldabetterplacethroughconsumerculture,corporateendorsements,andmiddle-classrespectability; instead,theyturneda spotlightonthe mythofthegreatAmericanhero. TheBlackmanin“dahood”with somethingcriticaltosaybecamea threateningforce;therapperwasso threateningtomainstreamAmerica thatin1992RepublicanVicePresidentDanQuaylecalledTupac Shakur’sdebutsoloalbum 2Pacalypse Now—consideredoneofthegreatest hiphopalbumsofalltime—adisgracetoAmericanmusic.Meanwhile, BlackmenlikeJordan,whoprojected asafe“buddy”masculinityandwho wererightathomeincapitaliststructureswiththeirnonthreateningaffabilitybegantotakeupspacewithin thepopularcultureasappealing heroicfigures.Today,violentwhite maleheroesonthebigscreenhave discursivelybeenframedasendearingandcharming;meanwhile,Black maleheroesareputintoaposition wheretheymustprojectthe“right” image—onandoffthescreen.These heroescanneverbeviolentbecause noBlackactsofviolenceareseenas justifiable—evenprotestsinresponse toBlackdeathatthehandsofpolice orwhitesupremacists.Nothing aboutthisdualityisnatural;itis madebypeople,notnaturallyoccurringhistoricalevents.Themythof theheroispartofasystemictunnel visionthatdominatesinWesternculture,whereinpeopleareunabletosee thesocietalstructuresthatmaintain collectiveoppressions.

WhiletherewereAfrican-American sportsheroesbeforehim—suchas sprinterJesseOwens,boxerMuhammadAli,baseballplayerJackieRobinsonandfellowbasketballplayer KareemAbdul-Jabbar—Jordanwas thefirstBlackmaleherotobebornof aconsumerbrand.In1984asa twenty-one-year-oldrookiewhohad notyetputonhisChicagoBullsuniform,Jordansignedafive-year endorsementdealwiththeapparel companyNike,nottoendorseanew Nikeshoe,buttohaveanentirebrand builtaroundhisimage—theAir Jordan1(AJ1s).

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ONFUTURITY

DismantlingtheMythoftheHero CHERYLTHOMPSON

Actionfilmsoftheeightiesalsocreateddozensofcinematicheroes.These figures,mostofwhomwerewhiteand male,wereeitherinawar,orveterans whoseviolenceseemedjustifiedina worldofturmoil.Fortheheroesin thesefilms,unrest—pastorpresent— wasalwayspersonal.Istillremember thefirstactionfilmofmychildhood, Rambo:FirstBlood.Originallyreleased in1982,andstarringSylvesterStalloneasVietnamWarveteranJohn Rambo,thisfilmwasfollowedby otherslike MissinginAction (1984), Platoon (1986), FullMetalJacket (1987), HamburgerHill (1987), Good Morning,Vietnam (1987), Bornonthe FourthofJuly (1989),and SavingPrivateRyan (1998),tonameafew.Black maleheroeswhoappearedinthe 1980sand1990swerealsoproduced throughthemediaindustries,however,thestorytellingaroundtheir heroismwasquitedifferentthanthe whitemaleheroismprojectedonto thesilverscreen.ThecaseofMichael Jordanisonesuchexample.

fterwritingmysecondbookon theculturalmutationofthefictional-character-turned-racial-epithet UncleTom,Ibegantoreflectonother enduringmythologicalfiguresthatare ubiquitousinourculture.Theherois oneofthem.Inthe2021HBObiopic Tina forinstance,whichdrew1.1millionviewerstothecareerandmusic ofTinaTurner,Iwasreacquaintedwith her1985hitsong,“WeDon’tNeed AnotherHero”fromthefilm MadMax: BeyondThunderdome.(The7-inchsinglefor“WeDon’tNeedAnother Hero”isnestledsomewhereinmy recordcollection).Turner’shitwasone ofmanyhero-themedfilmsoundtrack songsduringthedecade.Bonnie Tyler’s1984ballad“HoldingOutfor aHero”(featuredin Footloose)and “WindBeneathMyWings”(sometimestitled“Hero”),firstrecordedin 1982butattributedtosingerand actressBetteMidlerandthe1988film Beaches,aretwootherexamples.

Inaworlddominatedbyheroes,differenceisnottolerated A

OnHeroes,Hero-Worship,andthe HeroicinHistory (1841),ScottishhistorianThomasCarlylewasoneofthefirst toarguethatonlytheherohadthe visiontoseehistoryasithappened.For Carlyle,theviewpointoftheordinary personwasobscuredby“thespectersand phantasmagoriasofemancipation.”

Theheroisnotbornofmerefolklore; thearchetypeofmasculinity,perpetuatedonthebigscreen,insportsand inpopularmusicfordecades,hasits rootsinthenineteenthcentury.Inhis lectures

Carlylecoinedtheterm“visuality” toexplainthevisualizationofhistory; thatis,thestateofbeingvisual,making senseofthesocialworldthroughvision andvisibility,suchascreatinga“mental picture”ofsomething,ortheuseof imagestorepresentthematerialworld. Thisconcepthasbeentakenupby contemporaryBlackscholarswhohave unpackeditsimplication;aswell,many scholarshaveexplainedwhythevisual heronarrativecannotbeappliedto Blackmen.In PictureFreedom:RemakingBlackVisualityintheEarlyNineteenthCentury (2015),JasmineCobb arguesthattheoriesofBlackvisuality mustfocusattentiononhowthevisual practicesofslaveryconstructeda racializedsocialorderthatsuppressed theBlackgaze—one’sabilitytoseeand beseen.Denyingtheverypossibilityof suchagazewasakeystrategyinthe colonialconstructionofBlackpeople asvisibleobjectsunderslavery,notas authorizedsubjects.WhenCarlyledissociatedvisionfromcorporeality— meaninghethoughtofsightnotas auniversalexperiencebutasan actdependentontheskinyou arein—histheoriessupported theconstructionofBlackness aspureembodiment,notof reasonandthought.Inother words,Blackpeoplewere deemedtolackavisualhistory. Blackemancipation,asa result,wasviewedthrough theprismofanti-heroism.

TheAgeofEnlightenmentin theseventeenththroughnineteenthcenturies,atimemarked byrationality,reasonandscientific progress,helpedtocreatethemythicalherothatcametodominatetwentieth-centuryvisualculture.To see inthe nineteenthcenturywastoimaginea worldfromthepointofviewofwhite Europeanmen.Inaworlddominated byheroes,differencewasnottolerated. Instead,ithadtobeexplainedthrough aprismofOtherness.Hence,the

Forinstance,in1831 whenNatTurner,a highlyliterateenslaved preacher,setoffatwodayuprisingbyboth enslavedandfreeBlack peopleinSouthampton County,Virginia,authoritiesrespondedwithaviolent crackdown.Turnerwascaptured,convictedandlaterhanged. Obviously,hewasnotaherotoVirginianauthoritiesbutintheannalsof history,Turner’sactionsprovideus withtheabilitytocritiquethevisualizationofhistory. WhenAfrican-Americansescaped enslavement,theywerelabelled“fugitives”becausethevisualityofthetime couldonlyallowtheirbodiestobe viewedthroughtheeyesofwhite authorities.ForAfricanAmericans,

emergenceinthenineteenthcentury oftheoriesofeugenics,“survivalofthe fittest”andbeliefsintheinnatesuperiorityofAnglo-SaxonProtestant whitemen.Iftheherowasbornoutof visualizinghistory,anti-heroes,especiallyBlackmen,wereconfigured, imagined,seen,andrepresentedas everythingtheheroisnot—athreatto Enlightenmentnotionsoffreedom andliberty.

Image:AnnaBintaDiallo,BlackCowboy,2020.CollageprintedonPhoto-TexAdhesiveFabric.23x13inches.

OnFuturity55

Meaning,wherethe“ordinaryperson” (e.g.,non-whites,thepoor,and women)wasbelievedtobeapassive observerofhistorywithoutagency, thehero,accordingtoCarlyle, stoodatthevantagepointof beingabletograspthefull scopeofhistory—asithappenedandinretrospect—with citizenshiprightsandunrestrainedabilitytoact.Withhis unboundedvision,theheroicfigurehadbothapresentexistence andadefinedpast:onlyhecould envisionthefuture. In OnVisuality,NewYork UniversityprofessorNicholas MirzeoffexplainsthatCarlyle createdanewformofheroism inwhich“thevisualizedhero wasboththetruesourceof Enlightenmentanditsprimordialorigin,atemporal jumpthatonlycouldbe understoodinavisualized formofwritingaspicture.”

CourtesytheartistandtheTowardsGalleryinToronto,ON.

BobAdelman’siconicphotograph ofDr.MartinLutherKingJr.deliveringhis“IHaveaDream”speechon thestepsoftheLincolnMemorialin Washington,DConAugust28,1963, capturedKingstrikingaheroicposeas hegesturestowardtheskyagainstthe colossalcolumnsoftheLincoln Memorialbehindhim.WhileKingis consideredaheroicfiguretoday(aswe lookbackonthepast),inthe1960s, manywhitepeopleandthemedia— lookingforwardintothefuture— loathedKing’sinsistenceondisrupting thestatusquoofwhiteAmerica.He wasananti-herotomany.Assuchhis speechisnotrememberedinitstotality,especiallythepartswherehe rebukessegregationandwhiteracism; instead,thevisualityofhisrecollection ofadreamiswhatisremembered. Nowadays,ithasevenbeenreducedto hashtag-ablemoments.

In2013,incommemorationofthe fiftiethanniversaryoftheMarchon WashingtonandKing’sspeech,NBC NewsaskedallAmericanstoshare their“dreams”byusingthehashtag #DreamDayandcompletingthestatement,“Ihaveadreamthat[fillinthe blank].”AsAmericansrespondedwith postsonsocialmedia,someofthesubmissionswhichwerefeaturedon NBC’sflagshipnewsprogramswere nothingmorethan individualistdreams aboutpeople’slivesandfamilies;there waslittlerecognitionofthecontinued fightforsocialjusticeandtheeradicationofracism.Forinstance,inavideo postedtoYouTube,IvankaTrumpsaid, “Ihaveadreamthateducationalequalitywillbecomeaglobalreality.Thisis incrediblyimportanttomeasIhavea youngdaughterandanotherchildon theway,andIhopetheygrowupina worldwherethatcomestopass.”This “dream”doesnotmeananythingtoan individualwhohasnodiscerniblesocial justiceplatformtospeakof.Thesuperficialityofthehashtag#DreamDay rendersinvisibletheimagined futureof King’sdream. Theprospectiveofvisualizinga Blackfutureisdeeplyrootedinconceptionsoffreedom.Ibelievethatto hope,youmustdaretoquestionthe thingsyouhavetakenasessential truths.Youmustquestionnotionsof freedom,emancipation,andequality becausetheyareatthecentreofunderstandinghoweveryone,notjustwhite maleheroes,hasexperiencedchallengesintheWesternworld.Whatit meanstobeBlackandfreeisnotand hasneverbeenthesameaswhatit meanstobewhiteandfree.Dismantlingthemythoftheherowouldhelp usmoveconversationsaboutraceand anti-Blackracismawayfrombeing almostentirelylocatedinabinary frameworkofgoodversusevil,and mostimportantly,rightversuswrong. Instead,wewouldbeabletohave nuancedconversationsthatarerooted inhistoricalcontextandcomplexity.

56Geist119Winter2021

Writingin1995,culturaltheorist StuartHallobservedthat“inliberalideology,‘freedom’isconnected (articulated)withindividualismandthe freemarket;insocialistideology,‘freedom’isacollectivecondition,dependent on,notcounterposedto,‘equalityofcondition,’asitisinliberalideology.The sameconceptisdifferentlypositioned withinthelogicofdifferentideological discourses.”Freedom,inotherwords, isasubjectiveconceptdependenton ideologybutalsohistoricalcontext. WhenpeoplewhochallengeWestern notionsof“freedomofspeech”and“freedomofexpression”areaccusedofpoliticalcorrectnessorso-calledcancel culture,thepresentistconcernsofprimarilywhiteindividualsareoftenput abovecollectivehistories.Forexample, infall2020whenaletterwrittenin Frenchandentitled“Libertéssurveillées” or“MonitoredFreedoms”andsigned bythirty-fourUniversityofOttawaprofessorsdisagreedwithhowawhiteprofessorwhousedtheN-wordintheir classhadbeentreated,theyarguedthat notusingtheN-wordinclassesputacademicfreedomatrisk.Thefactthatthat wordhasbeenusedforcenturiesasa weaponofviolenceagainstBlackpeople didnotmattertothesignatoriesofthat letter.Instead,theytookontheroleof theauthorities,comingtothedefence ofanindividual’srighttospeakanddefine academicfreedom,ignoringthosewho havebeenhistorically(collectively) harmedbyitsuse.Ifthoseprofessors couldseethroughtheeyesoftheirBlack students,wouldtheycontinuetodefend usingthatword?Wouldtheycontinue toviewfreedomthroughanindividualistlens?

Themedia,asHalloncenoted,is oneplacewhereideasaboutraceare articulated,workedon,transformed andelaborated.Themediadoesnot teachushowtofeelorhear,itteaches ushowtoseeandwhattosee.Itgives usourviewpoint,ourperspective.For example,in SeeingThroughRace:A ReinterpretationofCivilRightsPhotography, authorMartinBergerarguesthat civilrightsphotographsfromthe 1960softenreducedthecomplexsocial dynamicsofthecivilrightsmovement toeasilydigestednarratives,prominent amongthemwhite-on-Blackviolence. Howhavecomplexandchallenging problemsbeenoversimplifiedthrough avisualityofwhiteheroismandBlack anti-heroism?Howdocenturies-long modesofseeingstillshapehowwesee andwhatwesee?

escapedslaveswere“freedomseekers,”renegadesandliberators.This explainswhyHarrietTubmanwas knownasthe“Mosesofherpeople,” butinthevisualityofthenineteenth century,shewasa“dangerous”criminal.Today,wehavetheabilitytosee TubmanandevenTurnerasheroes, fightingagainsttheunjustinstitution ofslavery,butthelastingimpactof theiranti-heroicvisualityisthateven today,Blackactsofcivildisobedience arerarelyinterpretedthroughalens ofBlackvisuality,butinstead,we assumethepointofviewofwhite authorities.

Filmsthatmoveustoseeacollectivelivedrealitythatisbothpastandin anticipationofafuturehelpusgetone stepclosertorealizingKing’sdream. Weneedanimaginedfuturewhere historicaloppressionsareunderstood asrelevanttoourpresentmoment,not assomethingweneedto“getover.”We needanewvisualitythatenableseveryonetoseehistoryasitis,notasthe 1980sactionherowouldhaveusseeit. CherylThompsonistheauthorof Uncle: Race,Nostalgia,andthePoliticsofLoyalty (2021)and BeautyinaBox:DetanglingtheRootsofCanada’sBlackBeauty Culture (2019).Shealsowritescultural commentariesforseveralCanadiannews andpopularculturesites.In2021,Thompson wasnamedamemberoftheRoyalSociety ofCanada’s(RSC)CollegeofNewScholars, ArtistsandScientists.ShelivesinToronto.

OnFuturity57 In

BlackIsBeautiful:APhilosophyofBlack Aesthetics (2016),PaulTaylorargues thatquestioningaesthetictheoryisone waytomoveustowardaskingdeeper questionsaboutthestatusormeaning oftheconceptsemployedintherepresentationalworld.QuestionslikeWhat isart?andArejudgmentsofhuman beautyreallyaboutbeauty,orarethey aboutsomethingelse?Sinceheroesare notbornbutareproducedthroughour visualcultureandtheyarealways dependentonseeingandvision,how canwecreateheroeswhoarerepresentationallydifferentfromthosewho havebeenproducedsincetheAgeof Enlightenment?Howcanweletgoof thevisualizedhero?Ultimately,partof theprocessofunpackingthehero, especiallythetightlyconstrainedBlack malehero,beginswithunderstanding theconceptofBlackfuturity,which asksthatwethinkaboutourlanguage— whatwesayandhowwesayit.

In ListeningtoImages (2017),Tina Camptarguesthatfuturityisnota questionof“hope”—thoughitisintertwinedwiththeideaofaspiration.For Campt,futurityisabout“tense.”What isthe“tense”ofaBlackfuture?There isnotraditionofplacingBlackheroes inhistory.PriortoJordan,andapart fromKing,therehavebeennoBlack malefigureswhohavecapturedthe collectivepublic’simaginationasa hero.Whilewearestillinundatedwith whitemaleheroesonthebigandsmall screens,andinpopularcultureingeneral,thereisarguablynolivingBlack herowhohasreplacedtheaforementioned.(WhileformerPresident BarackObamaisoftenlabelledahero, hehasmanycriticssuchasDr.Cornel Westwhowouldstaunchlydisagree). Today,Blackmartyrs—fromTrayvon MartintoGeorgeFloydandthe dozensofunarmedBlackmenand womenintheUnitedStates,Canada andelsewherewhohavediedatthe handsofpolice—havebecomethenew heroesforthewaysinwhichtheir deathshavespawnedasocialjustice

movementforchange.Echoingthe fateofUncleTomwho,inHarriet BeecherStowe’snineteenth-century novel UncleTom’sCabin,diedamartyr’s deathatthehandsofawhiteplantation owner,whyisdeathstillthepredominantentrypointforBlackmaleheroisminthetwenty-firstcentury?

Theslogan“BlackLivesMatter”is muchbiggerthanjustanti-Black racisminpolicing.Itisarguablythefirst metaphysicaldemandofthiscenturyto challengethebinarylogicofheroversus anti-hero.BlackLivesMatterisabout anembodied,visualdemandforBlack freedomthatisnotembeddedinan individualistnarrativethatpositions onesolitarymanwiththevisiontosee— past,present,future—buttoalsosave everyone.AllBlackpeoplecanbecome heroes.AvaDuVernay’sNetflixseries WhenTheySeeUs (2019)echoesthis egalitariandemandinthatitnotonly anticipatesafuturewhereBlackmenare seenandheard,italsounpacksacomplicatedpast,movingtheviewerbeyond aestheticsandtheindividualistnarrative ofaheroicvisuality.

THE BECOMING OFVANCOUVER

Citiesasktobecompared:wegofrom onecitytoanotherandfeelimmediatelythestrangenessofthenew,ofthe not-yet-known.Butthenatureofthat strangenessishardtopindown.When IvisitedTorontoattheendofthelast centuryIdiscoveredthatseatsonthe buses(andthestreetcars)werelower thanseatsonbusesinVancouverbyan inchormore:itwasnecessarytomake anadjustmenttoavoidfallingwhile loweringyourselfintoplace;aweek laterIdiscoveredthatescalatorsin Ottawamoveataterrificrate(compared toescalatorsinVancouver),andcan threatentotoppletheunwary.Daniel Francis,eminenthistorianoftheCanadian(eg:theFurTrade,theWhale Fishery,theSexTrade,theImaginary “Indian,”theCPR,etc.),hasnowpublished BecomingVancouver:AHistory (Harbour),whichissetto becomethedefinitiveaccountofthe cityknownvariouslyastheGateway tothePacific,theLiverpoolofthe West,andtheSunsetoftheDominion. Nowandforthefirsttime,thestory ofVancouverislaidoutinacleannarrativethatbeginswiththeIndigenous stewardsofthelandandcarrieson throughtheusurpationofIndigenous landandculture,thestruggletoerase non-Britishimmigrants,thetransformationoftheearthintorealestateowned andadministeredbytheCPRand QueenVictoria,andontothepresent day,astheIndigenousstruggleforplace beginstore-shapethecity.Muchof the“official”Vancouverstorywasthe workofMajorSkittMatthews,City Archivist,defenderoftheUnionJack (asopposedtotheMapleLeaf),and promulgatoroftheromanceofacity builtbysturdyBritishEmpiremenand womeninanemptywildernessgiven tothembyGod.AugustKhatsahlano, aSquamishelderwhosefamilywas uprootedfromtheirhomeafewblocks fromthehousethatMatthewsbuilton landpurchasedfromtheCPR,offered tosharewiththeArchivisthisaccount ofthetraditionsandpracticesofhis forebears—resultinginaninvaluable recordofpre-CPRtimesthatforced Matthewstoenlargehisgenesismyth toincludenon-Britishcultures,and allowsDanielFrancistofindascaffoldingforhismulti-facetednarrative. ThestoryofVancouverhasmany bywaysandDanielFrancis,inthis excellenthistory,hasilluminatedmany ofthem.Ofcoursetherearestill accountstoberenderedofthemoney launderersandfentanyl-purveyors whosemanipulationshelptofuelthe riseinhomepricesandthenumbers ofhomelesspeoplestrandedinits streets.Thisisavaluableandnecessary book.

—StephenOsborne OLDERANDBETTER ARobThomasreviewin BrokenPencil, ofRayRobertson’s TheOldManin theMirrorIsn’tMe (ExileEditions), wassointriguingandcomplimentarythat Ihadtorushoffandorderacopy.Once againIprovedtomyselfthatbook reviewsareanunderrated,sure-fire mediumofpromotion.Iwasn’tdisappointed:Robertson’sminimalistpoems, or“LastCallHaiku”asthey’resubtitled, arebothvibrantandentertaining.The authorprefaceshiscollectionwithan essaycalled“WhyIAmNotaPoet,”presumablybecausehe’spublishedeight novels,fourcollectionsofnonfiction,and nopreviouspoetry.Thisessayaloneis worththe$18.95purchaseprice,because itdoublesasaself-helplessonforpeople stoppedupwithwriter’sblock.Toillustrate,Robertson’sdepictionofasuccessfulpoetryreadingcanmakeeventhe mostill-fatedpoetfeellikeawinner:“You showedup,youhopedthereweremore

REVIEWS,COMMENTS,CURIOSA

ENDNOTES

58Geist119Winter2021

—JillMandrake

—JonathanHeggen TREELIT

KOREANSUPPER

Printedonthebackofthetitlepageof RichardPowers’s TheOverstory (Vintage)isanotestatingthat“byusing recycledpaperinplaceofpapermade with100percentvirginfiber,thepaperbackfirstprintinghassaved:169trees, 13,000gallonsofwater,73,200pounds ofgreenhousegasemissions,580pounds ofsolidwaste.”That’salotofgrateful trees.

—MichaelHayward

WHYWHITEPEOPLE AREFUNNY

IapproachedMichelleZauner’s CryinginHMart:AMemoir (Penguin RandomHouse)withthetentative awarenessthatIamhertargetdemographic:anagingmillennial,theresult ofabiracialmarriage,aformer“indie kid”withapropensityforthesentimental.Zaunerspendsmuchofherdebut memoirexaminingtheworldthrough thissamelens:thehalf-Korean

TheOverstory is,inmanyways,a fairlyconventionalmulti-generational saga,tellingthestoriesofnine Americansandtheirdescendantsoveraperiod ofabout150years.Whatmakes The Overstory unconventional—andfascinating—isthatitisessentiallyawork ofnaturalhistoryinnovelform.The storiesofitscharactersaretoldthrough theirrelationshipswithtrees:Nicholas Hoel’sgreat-great-great-grandfather plantsachestnuttreeonanisolated homesteadinIowa,thuspreservingit— forawhile,atleast—fromtheblight whichdestroysthevastchestnutforests farthereast;MimiMa’sfatherplantsa mulberrytreeinhisbackyardinCaliforniatohonorhisfatherandthesilk industry,throughwhichthefamily madetheirfortunebackinChinabefore hisemigration;WatchmanandMaidenhairspendmorethanayearsuspendedinthebranchesofagiant redwoodnamedMimas,hopingtosave it(andothers)frombeinglogged.Powersweavestreefacts—andhistory,and science—intothenarrativeof TheOverstory. Theresultmaybeapolemic,but itisapersuasiveandengagingone.It could—andshould—becomeafoundational“treelit”text,atouchstonefor thosewhowouldcampattheFairy Creekblockade,orelsewhereonthe frontlinesofthebattletosaveour remainingstandsofoldgrowthtrees.

songstress(Zaunerrecordsunderthe nameJapaneseBreakfast)delvesinto questionsofidentityandrepresentation,butwhatIdidnotexpecttoidentifywithmostisthesadnessthatfuels herartisticjourney.Thesourceof Zauner’stearsistheterminalillnessof hermother,whosebattlewithcancer bringsZaunerintoherownmaturity. Inreadingherstory,Isawthestruggles ofmyownparents,andfoundanew appreciationforthetypeofsilentlove offeredtochildrenofimmigrants:all theSaran-wrappedmealslefttoturn coldonthekitchentable;therearrangingoffinancialstopayforschool;the masteryofreadingeventhemostsubtle emotionsfromafar.Zauner’sskillis identifyingtheseminutiae,thesilent lovewhichremainsevenafterdeath, intangiblebutrealasair.Shereifiesthis invisibledevotionandbringsittothe fore:themealspreparedforuswithout ourpresence,thefaiththatourdelinquencywillbeoutgrown,andtheprivate hopethat,althoughourparents’love canneverfullybereturned,itwillone daybeappreciated.

Inthedocumentary Qallunaat!Why WhitePeopleAreFunny (NFB)by ZebedeeNungakandMarkSandiford, whitepeoplearethesubjectsofstudy byInuitwho,forseveralhundredyears, havethemselvesbeenthesubjectsof studybysettlers.QallunaatistheInuit

Endnotes59 peopleintheaudiencethantherewere onstage,andifyouwerelucky,youmight evengohomewithsomebeermoney.” Inonesectionwheretheauthorsets downhisliteraryinfluences,hementions RichardBrautiganinamostlydismissive manner,butpoemssuchas“Waitingfor theleavestofall,”“Theworldwakesup withahangover”and“Infrontofthemen’s shelteranemptybeercan”evokesome ofBrautigan’sbasicthemesfrom The Tokyo-MontanaExpress (1980).Robertson’s strongpointishowhesuspends momentsoftimeinhismicro-poems. Anexampleisthisarchetypalportraitof aruralDad,whoseemstospanthegenerations:“Myfatherdoesn’tneedtobe happy/Tobehappy/Thefirstsniffof springanderrandsoutsideallday.”

—AnsonChing DANCINGABOUT ARCHITECTURE

60Geist119Winter2021

wordforwhitepeople,butitrefersless topeopleofacertainskincolourand moretopeoplewhoexhibitoddbehaviours,likeobsessingoverprivateproperty,alwaysbeinginahurry,jumping toconclusions,plusignoringlocal knowledgeandneedingtoberescued whenthey“explore”thenorth.Atthe QallunaatStudiesInstitute(QSI),labcoatedInuitmeasuretheheadsofwhite peopleanduseaQallunizer(avacuumlikecontraption)todeterminewhether apersonisqallunaat,allwhilespeaking rapidInuktituttotheiruncomprehendingsubjects.AttheDepartmentof WhiteMan’sAffairs,officialsdiscusshow tokeeptrackoftheqallunaat,because therearesomanyofthemandthey havesuch“hideous”names.Laterwe seealineupofqallunaatreceivingtheir Q-numbers—anewidentificationtool— andtraditionalInuitnicknameslike “saggingpants”and“alwayscold.”Less funnyarethepatronizingcommentariesfromoldnewsreelsaboutthe “primitive”peopleintheArcticwhoare goodatlearning“imitativeskills,”but willneedasettlereducationinorder tobefunctionalinthemodernworld. Neartheendofthefilm,ZebedeeNungak,ajournalistandfilmmaker,andpart ofthefirstgenerationthatreceiveda qallunaateducation,talksofbeingabeneficiaryandavictimofthateducation. Whilelookingatanoldphotoofhimself, hereflectsthatwhatheseesis“ayoung boywhoisjustskimmingthroughhis boyhoodtotakehisplaceasaman amongmen”inhiscommunity.That trajectorywasbroadsidedby“civilization.” Qallunaat!WhyWhitePeopleAre Funny hasalotoflaugh-out-loud moments,aswellascringe-worthy scenes(atleastfortheqallunaataudience).Itisstreamingforfreeonthe NFBwebsite. —PattyOsborne VOYEURGALORE MyfriendErikwarnedmeaboutJorge Amado’s CaptainsoftheSands (PenguinRandomHouse),anovelthatfollowsadefiantgangofstreetchildren innortheasternBrazil.Accordingto him, CaptainsoftheSands isdespisedby alotofBrazilians,especiallythosein thesouth,whorefertothebookas nothingbut“povertyporn.”Erikhas apoint.Thecoverofmycopyof CaptainsoftheSands isvoyeuristic:jungle frondsframeasceneofsilhouetted boysrunningonabeach.WhenIread CaptainsoftheSands, Ihadjustcome fromRawiHage’sworldofwar-torn Beirut,asdepictedin DeNiro’sGame Icouldn’thelpbutseesimilarities:both AmadoandHagefloodtheirpageswith visceralandhigh-impactscenes,translatingdestitutionforshock.With Amado,it’sragsgalore.WithHage,it’s bombs.Insuchsettings,charactersact withchutzpah,butsometimestheirgall leadstocruelindifference,alackof curiosityintheirfellowsufferers.In De Niro’sGame,themaincharacters,BassamandGeorge,donotseethewomen intheircity—theysimplyusethemto getby.Thiscouldbeliteraryrealism, butitcouldalsobedescribedas“war porn.”In CaptainsoftheSands,thereis atleastmorenuanceandcommentary, evenifitisindirect.Oneofthegreatest tragediesinthenoveliswhenaboy,the leaderofagangofstreetchildren, rapesapoorgirl.Afterwards,sheforces himtoseethehorrorofwhathedid, andthepowerhe’dalwaysfeltinstantly meltsaway.Herealizesthatshe’sjust achild,andmoreover,thatheisjusta childaswell.WhileIcanseewhy Amadoisdislikedbysome,Ihaveto saythathiswritingismorethan “povertyporn.”

DavidMitchelliscursedwithhaving writtenacult-classicnovel:his Cloud Atlas (2004)isamulti-layereddazzler ofabookconstructedfromsixnarratives nestedonewithinanotherlikeRussian matryoshkadolls. CloudAtlas wasnominatedforseveralprestigiousawards, andwaseventuallymadeintoabigbudget (butso-so)filmfeaturingTom Hanks.Thereasonthatsuchanachievementisawriter’scurseisthateverysubsequentnovelwillalmostinevitablybe seentofallshortoftheearlierpeak. Andsoit(unfortunately)provestobe truewithMitchell’slatestnovel, Utopia Avenue (PenguinRandomHouse), whichtellsthestoryofafictional1960seraBritishrockbandofthatname(the band’smanagerisLevonFrankland, described,somewhatredundantly,as“a veryniceguy.ACanadian.”)Thelate ‘60sandearly‘70swasarichperiodfor rockmusic,andMitchellevidently holdstheeraveryclosetohisheart. Unfortunately,“writingaboutmusicis likedancingaboutarchitecture”(aquip thatMitchellattributestoCharles Mingus),andtheactivitiesofsingerElf Holloway,bassistDeanMoss,drummer Peter“Griff”Griffin,and“guitarvirtuoso”JasperdeZoet,quicklybreedsa hostofclichés.Manyfamousnames fromtheworldof‘60srockmake cameoappearancesin UtopiaAvenue.It’s ariskymove,particularlywhenMitchell givestheseiconsspeakingparts,their dialoguepresumablyderivedfromtheir publicpersonasandknownutterances.

LostFeast:CulinaryExtinctionand theFutureofFood byLenoreNewman(ECWPress)exploreshowthe extinctionoffoodspeciesaffectsthe cuisineweeat,andhowtheglobalizationofthecurrentfoodsystemthreatensculinarydiversityandlocalized delicacies.Ineachchapter,Newman providesahistoryofafoodthathumans haveeatenofftheplanet(whatshecalls “culinaryextinction”)—includingthe

—MichaelHayward PURVEYORSOF ELECTRICFANS

ClydeFans (Drawn&Quarterly),a graphicnovelfromCanadianwriter andgraphicartistSeth,tellsthestory oftwobrothers,AbeandSimonMatchcard,whohaveinheritedabusiness foundedbytheirfather,Clyde:astorefrontwhichbegansellingoscillating fansonToronto’sQueenStreetWest in1939.Thestoryopensin1997,and ClydeFanshasfallenonhardtimes, avictimoftechnologicalchange:inthe eraofair-conditioning,oscillatingfans arenolongerindemand.TheQueen Streetstorehasclosed,andAbe,the elderbrother,livesaloneabovethe shop,wanderingamongthebric-abracandmemorabiliaofalifetime,talkingtohimself.Abeistheclassicsalesman;inhiseyestheonlytruemarkof successisone’sabilitytocloseasale. HisyoungerbrotherSimon,therefore, hasbeenasourceofdisappointment. Simonisadreamer,acollectorofnoveltypostcards;heiscompletely unsuitedtoalifeinsales.Reading Clyde Fans,Ibecamecompletelyabsorbedby

theinteriorlivesofthesetwocharacters—theirthoughtsandfeelings,their dreams—andbythecomplexitiesof theirrelationships.Whatmorecould onewantfromanovel,graphicorotherwise,thantolookupfromthepage andfindthattimehaspassed,andthat you’vebeentransported?Sethisamasterofthishybridform,blendingthe visualandtheliteraryarts,andusing techniquesborrowedfromcinema: close-ups,dreamsequences,varying cameraangles,andthecuttoblack.

Here’sDavidBowiecommiseratingwith Jasper:“I’vebeentheNextBigThing sinceIleftschool,butI’m still broke.” Atonepoint,intheChelseaHotelin NewYork,ElfHollowaysharesanelevatorwithLeonardCohen,whointroduceshimselfas“Lenny”(Mitchellis beingcoy,since we knowwhoLenny is,whileElfisforcedtoplaythenaïf); later,Janis(Joplin,ofcourse)observes world-wearilytoElfthat“guys” inevitablycapitalizeontheirencounterswithher:“‘IknowJanis.Shegave meheadontheunmadebed.’Ihateit.” Thisfeelslikegimmickry,andthese“real” characters,presumablyintendedtolend verisimilitudetoMitchell’stale,behave likestiff-jointedhologramsofthemselves;theresultingtextbecomeslittle morethanapastiche.

Endnotes61

EATENTOEXTINCTION

Seth’s ClydeFans isapowerfuldemonstration(toanyonestillindoubt)of thefullpotentialofthegraphicnovel form. —MichaelHayward POUTINEPILGRIMAGE

Shimokitazawaislocatedintheheart ofTokyo,amerefiveminutetrainride awayfromShibuya,homeofthe famousfour-waypedestriancrosswalk. Theareaiscomprisedofrecordstores withmustyvinyl,usedclothingstores solelypatronizedbyEnglish-speaking expats,andtwistingstreetsthatintersectseeminglyatawhim.Nestledinbetweenisalittlehole-in-thewall restaurantnamed“RobsonFries”and infrontofit,wavingagainstthebright bluebackdropofTokyo’ssky,isthered andwhiteCanadianflag.CandIhad beenlivinginTokyoforsometimeand hadbecomehomesick;IhadbeenclickingonsomanyVancouver-related linksthatIstartedreceivingadsfrom TourismVancouver.Sowhenwecame acrossRobsonFries,Iwasovercome bythefeelingthatitwasmyCanadian dutytotasteandassesstheauthenticity ofwhattheyhadtooffer.Weordered apulled-porkpoutineandwhenitwas ready,wequicklysnappedsomephotos anddugin—what’sworsethanacold poutine?Iwashappilysurprisedtofind thatthefrieswerecrisp,thegravywas flavourfulandthecheesewasamelty gooofdeliciousness.However,my keenCanadiansensesnotedthatitwas inauthentic;thecheesygoowasmozzarellaratherthanthetraditional cheesecurds.Aswepaidforourmeal, IsawasignonthewallinformingvisitorsthattheownertakesyearlypilgrimagestoVancouvertotrawlforthe newestpoutineinnovations.Ithought oftellinghimIwasfromVancouver. Ithoughtoftellinghimthatauthentic poutineneedscheesecurds,butIreally likedhisversionanyway.IthoughtI wouldtellhimthatmostVancouver poutineisbadandthatheneedstogo toMontrealbecauseIheardthat’s whereallthegoodpoutineis.Instead, Isaidthanks.WereturnedtoVancouverfourmonthslaterandhaveyetto eatpoutinesince.

—SylviaTran

mammoth,theAnsaultpear,thepassengerpigeonandtheancientRomanherb silphium—andshepreparesacomplimentaryfeastwithfriendsinspiredby thelostfooditem.Heraccountsof thesefeastsaddlevitytothegrimnews thathumanshavelostmostofthevarietiesoffoodswehadpreviouslycultivated;forexample,wehavelost97% ofasparaguscultivarsthroughmodern industrialfarming.Zoomingin,Newmanexaminestheriseandfallofindividualfoods,suchasthehistoryof humaninterventionwiththepearfrom thedeclineoftheRomanempire,to thegardensofVersailles,tothepear crazeofnineteenth-centuryEngland andAmerica.Newmanmakesthecase forlocalizedeating,andtravelsaround herhome(theLowerMainlandinBC) tospeaktolocalfarmersandscientists, andtryfresh-from-the-tree(andsea) foods.Thereisanundercurrentof

62Geist119Winter2021

stopthinking:whichfoodisnext? —KelseaO’Connor POSTALLIT In LongLivethePostHorn! (Verso Books;translatedbyCharlotteBarslund) VigdisHjorthturnshertightlycrafted andpropulsivewritingstyletothesubjectofNorwegianpostalworkers,their labourunionandthemediaconsultancy grouphiredtohelptheunionmembers fighttheimplementationoftheEU postaldirectiveintheirjurisdiction.The resultisanoddstory,drivenbypublic opinionexpertsandtheirself-doubts,personaltragediesandexistentialcrises swirlingamidstthepoliticsofbiglabour, theexquisitebeliefofthepostalworkers inthevalueoftheirworkasasocial good,andthecold,fearsomeinevitability ofprogresswithinglobalcapitalism.

urgencyaswemovefromstorytostory ofdeliciousvarietiesoffoodsdyingout, beingeatentoextinction,orthreatened byterritoryencroachmentandecosystemdisruption,usuallyduetohuman action.Lestyouthinkthisbookisall doomandgloom,Newman’swriting isengaging,oftenhilarious,andher cleardelightindiscoveringnew(and, insomecases,previouslylost)tastesis infectious.Thefocusonfoodsthat humanshavedesiredsomuchthey’ve eatenthemtoextinctionisan approachableaccesspointtoherreal argument:thatthecurrentfoodsystem mustadapttobecomemoresustainable andavoidthefurtherextinctionofboth knownandunknownspecies.We’re invitedtoconsiderhowwe,personally, canmakechangestooureatinghabits sowecancontinuetoenjoythecornucopiaofthemoderntablefarintothe future.Sincefinishing LostFeast,Ican’t

MichaelHayward

—ShylaSeller ALONGINGTO BEFARAWAY

Endnotes63

Whileeverythingelseintheworldisfalling apart,thereisonethinglefttocounton: theprofoundlyhonourableandpersonal workofinterpretinghandwriting,turning deadlettersintolivingonesanduniting Norwayanditscitizensthroughanadequate,affordableandreliablepostalsystem.Hjorthexcelsatpresentingthe machinationsbehindaseeminglybland pieceoflegislation—onehardlyworth lookingupfromyourphonefor—and establishinganunderstandingofitsdire consequencesforsociety.Ifweallowthe posttobedestroyed,weallowourselves tobedestroyed,too.

IbecameafanofTejuCole’sworkafter readinghis2011novel OpenCity,which manycomparedtothewritingofW.G.

Sebald. Cole’s“sidehustle”isasa monthlycolumnistfor TheNewYork TimesMagazine,writingonphotography.Hislatestbookis Fernweh (MACKBooks),alarge-formatphotobookthatpresentsaselectionofhis photographs,“theresultofahalf dozentripstoSwitzerlandbetween 2014and2018.”ThetitleisaGerman word,“anantonymof heimweh (homesickness).Alongingtobefaraway.” WhataperfectwordfortheseCOVID19times,whenimagesofdistantlands serveassubstitutesfortheinaccessible originals.Turningthepagesof Fernweh, theimagesfloatongenerous white backgroundsasifemergingfrom clouds.Inoneimageweseearestaurant’sinterior,withaglimpseofLake Genevapartiallyvisiblethroughgauze curtainsandreflectionsinglass; anotherframesanalmost-abstract scatteringofblueandwhitecardboardcartons;anothershowswindblownsheets,hungtodry,withadistant mountainbarelynoticeableinthebackground.Someofthephotographsare facedwithfragmentsoftextarranged likelinesofpoetry,excerptsfroman 1872BaedekerguidetoSwitzerland:“in nocountry/istheweather/morecapricious”;“theutmost/orderand/decorum/arepreserved”;“whenPontius Pilate/wasbanishedfromGalilee/he fledhither.”InabriefafterwordCole pointsoutthatSwitzerland“isoneofthe keyplaceswherenineteenth-century travelphotographywasdeveloped,” andthatasaresult,“fewplacesareas closetotheirperfectedimageas Switzerlandis.”Cole’sphotographsoffer analternativetothosetoo-perfect images,andawelcomecounter-balance totheclichédtravelnarrativesoften foundinglossymagazines.

TheGEIST

John’ssonisn’tmuchofaunionmember,ishe? 23 Soundslikeyoushouldstartwiththe cowhidedress 25 Ihopetheofficialgamedoesnot involveasubmachinegun 26 WasEddybeingapillorwhowentround there? 28

Didthatbumreplytomyquestionabout thetoilet? 4 Soundslikehispoorcircumstances madeyouvomit 7 Iuseacousticmusictopulloutthestops 9 It’strue,myplatterdidcrashwhenI gaveittheboot(2) 10 Hurryupandreplacethoseoldpipes!(4) 12 Ididn’traisemychildrentobeinthe lastrow! 15 Ihearditwasontheleftcoast,aways outoftown(abbrev) 17

Awinnerwillbeselectedatrandomfrom correctsolutionsandwillbeawardeda one-yearsubscriptionto Geist magnet.

CrypticCrossword PreparedbyMeandricus Sendacopyofyourcompletedpuzzle, alongwithyournameandaddress,to: Puzzle#119GEIST #210-111WestHastingsSt. Vancouver,BCV6B1H4 orgeist@geist.com

ACROSS 1

ora Geist

Whenwashingup,thatlittleplasticpuppy isanecessarytroublemaker(2) 20 ThatyoungfartsureknowshisGreek alphabet! 21

Ifyougetmixedup,bothtapsare neededtoavoidcompletedarkness(2) 35 Thatsoupeduproadsterwasunreal! DOWN 1

thanothers 16 Mr.McDonaldwasapparentlyintothis (abbrev) 18 Whendidthatworldlyloverrulethe leftcoast? 19 Letmeshowyouhow 20 Wecan’tstoptheflooduntilwecontrol theregulators 22 Notradinginthisgame,Bro 23 Inthatvein,getoneoftheLeafstogo downthecentre 24 At16hefeltancient 25 Upcountry,welearnenfrançais(abbrev) 26 Holymackerel,thatshrubisonfire! 27 Hesatthereinthebranchofficeand atefish. 28 Andsomehairstylesareworthreturningto 31 Inthewinter,they’llpayforthissecurity!(abbrev) 32 Shelikestoslantadigitalnail Therewerenowinnersfor Geist 118.

64Geist119Winter2021

Thediverwasarealsuckerfortaking risks Fromabove,sheeyedthetwounder there Didyouseethewayhetestifiedin Hebrew? Itriedtoreadthatweirdragbutit’stoo strungout Thetieonthatbeerbottlemademe shout Thatoldhorsecouldseethathewas goingtobecut Myanalysismightbeagoodread(2) SoundsliketheVikings’planwentalittlepear-shaped Hisorgansoundscorny WhereSwedesfeelathomeontherange Someunionsseemtoconnectbetter

Thekeyistokeephimonashortchain 29 Forsure,themeaninghasbeenshortened(abbrev) 30 WhenBrucedrovecab,hisoldmovies mademesleepy 31 Wherearealltheplayerswhenthey’re notathome?(2) 33 Inthepast,Artwasalwayshomeonthe grange 34