Generation Magazine Volume 23 Issue 4

Wednesday, February 17

Sunday, February 28

Wednesday, March 3

Wednesday, March 3

Monday, March 15

Wednesday, March 17

Sunday, March 21 Monday, March 22

features 10 | music

NOT-SO-UNDERGROUND

We took an in-depth look into Buffalo’s underground music scene and learned that, well, it really doesn’t exist. What is going on out there? Is there such a thing as counterculture in the 2010s?

Feb. 9 - Feb. 22, 2010

CONTENTS 04 | Editor’s Letter

Ren plunges head first into a week of sex-tinged media.

05 | Agenda

Check out all the cool stuff going on from Feb. 9 to Feb. 22.

06 | Snapshot

Generation sits down with Liz Lidano, UB’s equivalent of a supreme court justice, to get the lowdown on the judicial system at UB.

07 | Counterpoint 12 | valentine’s day

SURVIVAL GUIDE

It comes around at the same time every year, but you always seem to be caught off guard—you’re either stuck without ideas or sitting home alone. Don’t worry, this time Generation has you covered. You can thank us later.

Josh Q. Newman explains why the University Bookstore is not to blame for the high cost of textbooks.

08 | He Says, She Says

All the questions you were too afraid to ask your parents when you were younger.

| Cool Campus Jobs

Get the lowdown on UB’s new student- run TV station.

09 | Edible Material

14 | campus life

SEX TALK

Sex can be great. STIs, not so much. Peer counselors clue you in to the questions you should be asking, but your friends clue you in to the answers you shouldn’t be hearing.

16 | Blueprint

One of the greatest architects of all time built his finest creation in Buffalo. Take a tour through the Queen City’s own Darwin D. Martin House.

18 | Campus & Region

Text or call our anonymous tipline with suggestions or questions for our advice columns. Forward us your texts from last night.

If you’re still spinning away at a rotary phone, just call us at 201-0436.

We asked random students what they hope to get out of this Feb. 14.

17 | Nickel City

(716) 2010-GEN

Grab some V-Day chocolate at Chow Chocolat and get your his & hers drink on.

Nick Baxter shares his experiences in the dangerous dating arena.

20 | Literary

Collaborations, critiques and poetry round out this issue’s lit section.

22 | Parting Shots

Photo Editor Jennifer Peters and Circulation Director Abraham C.L. Munson-Ellis share their deepest

thoughts. Plus, a bonus column about love and Twinkies from the one and only Jordan Brown.

Photo Credits: Cover: design by Dino Husejnovic, logo by Dino Husejnovic. Page 2: ad provided by Sub-Board I, Inc. Page 3: Top photo by Melissa Wright, middle photo courtesy of Johntex, bottom photo by Jennifer Peters. Page 4: Photo by Ren LaForme. Page 5: Top photo courtesy of Flckr user Brynn, second photo by Matt Skiba, third photo courtesy of New Line Cinema, fourth photo courtesy of Universal Studios, fifth photo courtesy of Paramount Films, top right photo courtesy of Leslie Lewis-Sword. Page 6: Image from sxc.hu, all others by Ren LaForme. Page 7: Image by Jennifer Peters, ad provided by Average Joe’s Bar and Grill. Page 8: UBTV logo courtesy of Danny Pittelli Page 9: Top and middle photo by Jennifer Peters, bottom left courtesy of Brouwerij Linderman’s, bottom right courtesy of St. Bernardus Brewery, ad designed by Dino Husejnovic. Page 10: All images by Melissa Wright, ad provided by CowPok. Page 11: Image courtesy of Andrew Zaeh, ad provided by the Student Association. Page 12: Graphic on left by Dino Husejnovic, bottom photo courtesy of April Killingsworth. Page 13: Top left image courtesy of New Line Cinema, bottom right photo courtesy of Marcin Klapczynski. Page 14: All photos by Jennifer Peters. Page 15: All photos by Jennifer Peters. Page 16: All photos by Caitlin Kustes. Page 17: Photo by Jennifer Peters. Page 18: Photo by Jennifer Peters. Page 20: Image courtesy of Warner Brothers. Page 21: Photo by Melissa Wright. Page 22: Top photo by Abraham C.L. Munson Ellis, bottom photo by Jennifer Peters. Page 23: Ad provided by Sub-Board I, Inc. Page 24: Ad provided by Collegiate Village Apartments.

ubgeneration.com | 3

editor’s letter Educate Yourself N

athan tossed his too-perfect-to-bestraight hair to one side of his face and took a deep breath. The girl prancing around drunk in front of him was pretty— beautiful even—and she was moving closer.

He had a girlfriend, and he’d been with her for a while, but they were still in high school.

He was ready to take that next step in the relationship. She wasn’t. That’s why, in a haze of booze and libido, he hooked up with the smashed siren—his girlfriend’s best friend.

If this sounds like the plot of some crappy teenage TV drama, it is—from the pilot episode of “Gossip Girl.” It stands tall with an army of like-plotted films, TV shows, books, and video games—not to mention real-life scandals starring political superstars Bill Clinton and Eliot Spitzer—that paint stories of non-monogamous relationships and cheating partners.

With the projected divorce rate hovering right around 50 percent, up astronomically from several decades ago, it’s easy to wonder if the ever-expanding media is toying with our lives. Could the constant bombardment of cheating play puppet master with people’s relationships and pull their heartstrings into the arms of others?

With this question in mind, I took a weeklong plunge into a world full of Swayze, Maconahay and Firth—a world that I had no business being in, a world that could have stripped me of my manhood—in the name of science, Mythbusters style. I wanted to see what effect, if any, a trove of trashy teentargeted viewing material would have on my own relationship.

I started out with “The Ugly Truth” with Gerard Butler and Katherine Heigl. I thought that if Mr. This Is Sparta could survive a crappy Rom-Com, so could I. Butler played the role of a misogynistic D-bag talk show host who broadcasted tips about hooking up with hotties to all men willing to listen. I chuckled a few times, but at the end of the movie I feared more for Butler’s movie career than my relationship.

The next day, I decided to expose myself to the king of cheaters—John Tucker. This kid hooks up with just about every girl in his school throughout the movie. If anyone was going to have an effect on me, it would be him. I sat through 89 minutes of garbage, complete with dudes in thongs, Ashanti’s awful acting (still slightly better than her music) and an appearance from anti-vaccination whackjob Jenny McCarthy and came to only one conclusion by the movie’s end: John Tucker must die. That kid was a jerk.

On Thursday, it was time to take a plunge for science. Pushing my fear of over-gelled meatheads and screechy beach babes into the back of my mind, I turned on MTV and 4 | ubgeneration.com

geared up for my first-ever experience with “Jersey Shore.” Just as the show was about to air, I realized what I was about to do and changed the channel. Some things are worse than cheating.

I turned on the news to detox and caught a glimpse of Tiger Woods before I quickly hit the power button. This was getting dangerous. Time to pick up a book and call it a night, I thought. I opened to where I left off in “Game Change,” a fantastic behind-thescenes look at the 2008 presidential election, and I read roughly two paragraphs before I stumbled across the political corpse of John Edwards and his wayward libido. Oops. Time for bed.

I had nightmares about Jude Law and David Duchovny and woke up in a cold sweat.

It was time to end this experiment before it ended me.

All kidding aside, I’m happy to report that the influx of sex-stained media and all the images of unfaithfulness and debauchery had no effect on my relationship. But after my experimenting, I still wasn’t satisfied.

My methods weren’t exactly scientific and all relationships are different, so I did some research and contacted some people who actually knew what they were talking about. I was a little surprised with what I found.

Sadie Leder, an adjunct instructor in the Department of Psychology, points out that even movies depicting happy couples can affect real-life relationships. Leder is an expert on close relationships, partner selection and romantic love.

“When people read about outrageous, extravagant things that relationship partners on television do for each other, this may influence their expectations,” she says. “True, most of us aren’t millionaires, but it doesn’t change the fact that seeing others get Tiffany rings, sports cars or $100 bouquets of flowers as gifts from partners can make us want those things, too… This can, unfortunately, lead to dissatisfaction.”

But the most damaging effects do not come from the depictions of overly ambitious relationships; they come from images of cheaters, extra-casual sex and the popular myths about sex that many media outlets choose to propagate.

“We’re hit with so many messages from such a young age,” says Jane Fischer, director of SBI Health Education. “Men: do it early and do it often. Women: do it, but don’t do it. Or, do it and they’ll like you, but won’t re-

“I took a weeklong plunge into a world full of Swayze, Maconahay and Firth—a world that I had no business being in, a world that could have stripped me of my manhood—in the name of science.” spect you. Don’t do it and they’ll respect you, but won’t date you. Both: don’t talk about it.

Don’t ask each other anything, because that’ll be weird.”

Contrary to what other fixtures around campus will have you believe, people DO talk about sex; largely due to the things they see onscreen or hear on the radio. The real problem is that they don’t say the right things. A staggering amount of people get their primary information about sex from movies like “The Hangover” and “Zack and Miri Make a Porno,” or from music, like when Asher Roth sings; “when it comes to condoms, put two on.” These outlets often take a jokey attitude toward sex, and that’s fine, but people really need to take the time to educate themselves about the facts and how to actually talk about sex with their partners.

“We’re shown sexuality from an activity standpoint, but we’re not shown how to manage it,” Fischer says. “Imagine if we were just shown millions of images of shiny, fast, fullyloaded cars speeding down the highways all the time, but we were never taught the rules of the road, or auto maintenance, or driver courtesy, etc.”

Case in point: When we decided to take the personals out of the magazine, people were practically banging down our doors to try to get their beloved dirty thoughts and vulgar messages back. But when Keeley tried to get people to have serious conversations about sex for her article (which starts on page 14), nobody wanted to talk.

This Valentine’s Day, if you really care about your partner, I suggest you sit down and have a serious conversation about sex, love and what you both hope to get out of your relationship. It will do more for you than any bouquet of flowers or box of chocolates could ever do.

Keep it clean,

Ren LaForme Editor in Chief

Editorial Staff Editor in Chief Ren LaForme Managing Editor Keeley Sheehan Creative Director Katelynn Padowski Asst. Creative Director Dino Husejnovic Associate Editor Joshua Bach Associate Editor Kathryn Przybyla Associate Editor Melissa Wright Photo Editor Jennifer Peters Circulation Director Abraham C.L. Munson-Ellis ContributingStaff Jordan Brown Jason Davis Michael Fix Caitlin Kustes Danielle S. Morgera Josh Q. Newman Alexandra Pivo Eric Schles

Business Staff Business Manager Elizabeth Caruso Interim Ad Manager Joshua Bach Asst. Ad Manager TBD

PASSIVE LANGUAGE IS NEVER USED BY US. Cover design by Dino Husejnovic.

Generation Magazine is owned by SubBoard I, Inc., the student service corporationat the State University of New York at Buffalo. The Sub-Board I, Inc. Board of Directors grants editorial autonomy to the editorial board of Generation. Sub-Board I, Inc. (the publisher) provides funding through mandatory student activity fees and is in no way responsible for the editorial content, editorial structure or editorial policy of the magazine.

Editorial and business offices for Generation are located in Suite 315 in the Student Union on North Campus. The telephone numbers are (716) 645-6131 or (716) 645-2674 (FAX). Address mail c/o Room 315 Student Union University at Buffalo, Amherst, NY 14260 Submissions to Generation Magazine should be e- mailed to ubgeneration@gmail.com by 1 p.m. Tuesday, a week before each issue’s publication. This publication and its contents are the property of the students of the State University of New York at Buffalo 2009 by Generation Magazine, all rights reserved. The first 10 copies of Generation Magazine are free.

Each additional copy must be approved by the editor in chief. Requests for reprints should be directed to the editor in chief. Generation Magazine neither endorses nor takes responsibility for any claims made by our advertisers. Press run 5,000. Oh look. A sex issue done right.

GENERATION February 9, 2010

agenda Remember Rwanda CONCERT | Snoop Dogg Hop on the soul plane and ask your stewardess for some gin and juice; the dee-oh-double-gee is coming to the Town Ballroom on Feb. 21. Snoop, who just helped Adidas launch a Star Warsthemed shoe line, is touring to promote his new album, “Malice n Wonderland.” Tickets are $40 and are available now.

ALBUM | Alkaline Trio – “This Addiction” The Chicago-based band gained exposure last year for being featured on the “Where the Wild Things Are” soundtrack. Die-hard fans appreciate Alkaline for “Goddamnit” in 1998 and their subsequent releases. Whether you’ve enjoyed them casually or have followed the band since their early days, “This Addiction” promises to be nothing short of brilliant. Pick up a copy on Feb. 23.

Leslie Lewis-Sword

COMEDY | Mike Epps Mike Epps, the man who bestowed his comedic gold onto America in the “Friday” movies, “How High” and most recently, “The Hangover” (as black Doug), is bringing his hilarity to Shea’s Performing Arts Center. Buffalo has the chance to experience Day-Day himself on Feb. 19. Tickets are $47, but the laughs will be priceless.

MOVIE | The Wolfman The highly anticipated remake of the classic movie is due to hit theatres Feb. 12. The movie has an all-star cast with Anthony Hopkins, Emily Blunt, the dude who played the agent in “The Matrix,” and Oscar-winner Benicio Del Toro. The story follows Lawrence Talbot through a small Victorian hamlet as he tries to solve the mystery that haunts the residents. On his journey, he discovers the beast within and tries to draw it out. Here’s betting they didn’t have to use too much makeup… Del Toro has always looked a bit like a wolfman.

MOVIE | Shutter Island Leonardo DiCaprio stars in the legendary Martin Scorsese’s latest work of art, “Shutter Island.”

DiCaprio is Teddy Daniels, a U.S. marshal who is called upon to investigate the disappearance of an inpatient at a hospital for the criminally insane. Daniels soon uncovers evidence that the doctors on Shutter Island are engaging in some illegal and twisted practices. This movie has to be good—Scorsese has been sitting on it for two years.

I

t was early April in 1994, and while the rest of the world was exploding into spring, Rwanda’s high altitude and proximity to the equator held it close to its usual year-round temperature of 70 degrees. And as Buffalo was thawing and celebrating Easter, the Rwandan president’s plane was struck from the sky by ethnic Hutu extremists. They took control of the state-run radio station, broadcasting a message of hatred toward ethnic Tutsis. Chaos erupted. The killings began.

Buffalo didn’t notice. Many Buffalonians had never even heard of Rwanda. But Alison Des Forges noticed. A former adjunct faculty member, Des Forges was one of the first in the world to realize that a full-blown genocide had begun in Rwanda.

She would prove to be a valuable asset after the horror, which took the lives of between 500,000 and 1 million Tutsis and political moderates. She led a team of researchers to Rwanda and little by little figured out what occurred, using what she learned to write a book detailing the tragedy and the aftermath. She testified in front of the International Criminal Tribunal for Rwanda and provided evidence to use against the killers.

Des Forges was truly an invaluable asset for the shattered country.

Des Forges was among the 50 that died when Continental Flight 3407 traveling from Newark, N.J. to Buffalo crashed in Clarence, N.Y. in February of 2009.

To celebrate Des Forges’ life and everything that she contributed to the Buffalo community and the world, the one-woman play “Miracle in Rwanda,” starring Leslie Lewis-Sword, will make an appearance at the Student Union Theater for three nights in February.

Feb. 11 is a fundraising night for the Alison L. Des Forges Memorial Committee to help raise money for a scholarship and lectures. The night will feature a reception in the Flag Room, live performances from Henri Muhammad’s School of Music, the opening performance of the show, and post-show speakers including Des Forges’ husband, Roger, and Aloys Habimana, a human rights practitioner and witness to the Rwandan genocide. Tickets for the first night cost $125.

Tickets for the second and third nights are $10 for students and $25 general admission. Feb. 12 includes a showing of the awardwinning 2004 film, “Hotel Rwanda” with a post-show discussion starring Paul Rusesabagina—who Don Cheadle plays in the film. The showing will be followed by a performance of “Miracle in Rwanda” and several guest speakers. At 10 p.m., exactly 365 days after Flight 3407 crashed, attendees will hold a candlelight vigil and moment of silence for the victims.

Feb. 13 includes a showing of the film “Sometimes in April,” the performance, several post-show speakers and closing remarks from Roger Des Forges. ubgeneration.com | 5

snapshot

who are struggling with financial aid standards. So sometimes we will advise them … they’re coming if they’re concerned about their federal aid because you have to meet a certain credit level, a certain GPA. So I’ve had to educate myself more about that; financial aid really isn’t my area.

Has anyone been tried under the Office of Judicial Affairs for violations on the UB SmokeFree policy?

Elizabeth Lidano

Be nice to this member of the UB administration— your future might depend on it. She gets to decide what happens to you when you get caught doing the stupid stuff you know you shouldn’t be doing, like when you brought that sixer into the Student Union last weekend. We sat down with Liz Lidano, director of Judicial Affairs & Student Advocacy, to get the lowdown on the judicial system at UB. What’s the most common offense of UB rules and regulations that your office has had to assign community service for?

Most common is probably all of the alcohol offenses, everything from a DWI to drinking at one of the fests or something like that. Number two may be a tie between marijuana and drug related offenses and some type of disorderly conduct. It could be anything from breaking tables in the Student Union to being in a scuffle with another student.

What is the greatest amount of community service hours you have ever had to assign to a student?

I never like it to be over 100 hours; I don’t even like it to be 100. It gets meaningless and it just becomes hours upon hours. They have to be able to be students and do their schoolwork. Many students work in addition, so it just becomes meaningless beyond that. And we do give them a reasonable amount of time to finish hours if they have a lot of hours.

Have any good stories about the crazy antics of UB students?

6 | ubgeneration.com

*Laughs* So many crazy antics.

One funny story involved a student who called the university police to say that his pot was stolen. That one always makes me laugh. Oh gosh, there’s so many.

What is the most fulfilling part of your job?

Believe it or not, when I’m talking to students that are temporarily suspended, and they might have had a fairly serious thing like a DWI or something that’s affecting someone in an outside court.

It’s really a defining place for some people. They’re going to decide from that place on whether they’re going to continue down a more destructive path. Someone may also be struggling with addictions; this is why they’re violating. I get to talk to them at a time in their life when they get to make a change. I could really be effective, hopefully. I like them, you know, I like students. I like the violators too. They’re usually really nice people, or good people. They have parents too, they have brothers and sisters and grandpas and aunts so I try always to remember that. And I hope that when my son is in college people remember that if he’s naughty.

What’s the worst part of your job?

There’s probably some people that want to be really argumentative about the rules or the process or don’t want to participate in a discussion—they’re not interested in mending what they did—and I like to feel like me and staff are really open to figuring people out. We only get a snapshot of what happened on a piece of paper. It would help if they were willing. Probably also the most frustrating thing is working with unrecognized fraternities.

There’s a lot of times I suspect, I know, people are in unrecognized fraternities and some very bad things are happening but they’re very tight lipped about it. Even if they want help they fear retaliation from other members. So it’s a vicious circle and I feel like I’d like to make some headway in that area. It’s frustrating for the recognized groups that follow the rules and frustrating for parents who know their child is in an unrecognized group and they know bad things are happening, but their child doesn’t want to come forth or tell anyone. That’s probably the most frustrating thing.

Regarding the Student Advocacy program, what would you say would be the No. one academic complaint and the No. one non-academic complaint your office has dealt with?

Probably the No. 1 academic complaint would be advising a student on whether they should go forward with grieving a grade.

A lot of times they’re struggling with what to do, and do they have a shot? Do they not have a shot? Is it a good case? We’ll advise them on that. Non-academic… most recently we’ve had a lot of students

No. With the smoke-free policy we’re… it’s new, as you know, and we’re not looking to get a judicial file on people. Having a case in the office is not the most serious thing, but for some students it can impact them depending on what they want to do in their future. If you want to work for the FBI, CIA, Secret Service, they’re going to check on people. I wouldn’t want to have to report on a smoking violation. It’s not really the spirit of the rule. The spirit is really to try to get a healthy culture at UB, and a place of higher education would promote health. So I think that’s what we’re trying to do.

The only way something would probably get referred to us is if it was coupled to another violation, like if someone asked you to stop smoking and you spit in their face.

If Tiger Woods had to be tried under the Office of Judicial Affairs, what would his sentence be?

I think we’d probably send him to counseling.

Would you pick Meryl Streep or Sandra Bullock for Best Actress at the Oscars this year?

I have a 1-year-old, so I don’t get to the movies, but I did see “Julie & Julia” so I’d have to go with Meryl. I love Sandy though.

Do you have any advice for kids looking to stay out of trouble?

I think that there are a lot of smart kids who know how to stay out of trouble. I would tell the students who are in the office more than once; ‘you’re not good at this, you keep getting caught.’ *Laughs* ‘Maybe there are people that are better, but you’re not.’ I think that being respectful of university police always helps.

That can exacerbate the problem, if someone’s just asking a couple questions, you might not get a referral.

How has the Alcohol Review Board made an impact on UB policies?

The Alcohol Review Board has been around for a long time. As you can imagine, we’d serve alcohol at an alumni gathering or a retirement, something like that.

I would say it probably has not had a new impact really. Most recently we added a Good Samaritan policy because we don’t want students to be afraid to call for help if they have friends who are dangerously intoxicated. So even if they were drinking and they shouldn’t have been or they’re underage or it was in their apartment we don’t want them to worry about the judicial consequences, we just want them to get help for their friend.

Is it possible to prosecute my biochemistry professor for being unlawfully boring to listen to?

No, boredom is not a rule violation… unfortunately.

Would you say the StudentWide Judiciary is comparable to an episode of “Law & Order?”

No! No! But I do think that there’s way too many law TV shows out there, which is why so many, including me, considered law school. I did not go but I watched those shows.

GENERATION February 9, 2010

counterpoint

Don’t judge a bookstore by its cover

By Josh Q. Newman

I

f you’re on a budget—and, assuming you’re a college student, you probably are—then one of the most dreaded words that comes to mind is “bookstore.”

The University Bookstore has received considerable flack from students because of the price of books. A price tag of $500 for the semester’s reading list is not uncommon (the national average is $488), which, combined with other pesky expenses like room, board and tuition, can make the final tally longer than MobyDick. But the management stresses that the University Bookstore does everything it can to help students, not antagonize them.

“A lot of students perceive the bookstore as the big, bad wolf,” says Nadine Manzella, the store’s customer service manager. “The notion, though, that we like to make students mad is ridiculous. If we treat them that way, then we couldn’t be doing business.”

The University Bookstore, which is part of the larger international eFollett Corporation, is the only textbook store on campus. Along with its sister medical bookstore on South Campus, it provides almost every course book UB students need. In the College of Arts and Sciences, the Department of English is the only

department that doesn’t exclusively use the bookstore—it requests its books from the independently owned Talking Leaves Bookstore on Main Street. It does, however, assign books from the University Bookstore for some introductory and intermediate courses.

Bill Adamczyk, the textbook manager, explains that the high prices come from the publishers.

“We get our books from wholesalers or directly from the publishers,” he says.

“The prices are usually based on content, electronic materials, printing services, updating, and researching subjects. eFollett has no control over their prices.”

The University Bookstore functions on a routine process. Every year, it sends out a letter to each department requesting information about needed books and supplies. When it receives the information, the bookstore looks for and negotiates with wholesalers and publishers. The bookstore is usually prepared with all required materials by the time each semester begins.

One of the larger problems the University Bookstore faces is its public image, something that has generally taken a beating ever since it was founded. Though that may not matter to the student who has to spend $200 or more for one class, it does tend to annoy those who work hard

to keep the store in operation.

“It has been a problem,” says store director Gregory Neumann. “The media has been fair for the past few years but we were getting hammered during the ’90s.

The bookstore gets an undeserved image.”

Managers argue that the University Bookstore has no direct control over the price of textbooks—the eFollett Corporation determines the prices, only 7 percent of which, according to released figures, goes toward the publisher’s income.

Though the bookstore will not release its gross margin because it is “proprietary information,” it does claim that it’s very close to the national average of 23 percent.

“The bookstore does everything it can to make books affordable,” Adamczyk says. “We try to get as many used books as possible. If we could, we would only get used ones.”

“The bookstore provides a lot of assisContinuted on page 19

UB

by jason davis

playlist:

With Valentine’s Day approaching, many people are trying to find the right music to tell that special someone how they really feel about them, and people that are trying to find the right song to SHOW that special someone how they really feel about them.

No worries, I’m here to help the musically-challenged pick the right songs to show love and make love. You can thank me later.

Top Five Love Songs 1. Everything I Do – Bryan Adams 2. Amazed – Lonestar 3. Better With You – Five Times August 4. I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing – Aerosmith 5. Everything – Michael Bublé Top Five Songs to Get It On To 1. Bed – J. Holiday 2. I’ll Make Love To You – Boyz II Men 3. Falsetto – The-Dream 4. Promise – Ciara 5. Everything in its Right Place – Radiohead

He Says, She Says An advice column divided by the sexes, starring Alexandra P. & Dino H.

Q: Usually, my girlfriend smells fine “down there,” but recently, it’s not so nice. I’m afraid of saying anything to her, because she might flip out. How do I tell her?

AP: You’re right, if you tell her, most likely she will flip out. But that doesn’t mean you should just keep your mouth shut and deal with it. Open communication is essential to healthy relationships, and there are ways for you to get across this information that can minimize her reaction. If subtle hints don’t work, then whenever the two of you are alone in a relaxed atmosphere tell her that you love her and you’re worried about her health (unusual smells can be a sign of a yeast infection).

Then offer to take her to the OB/ GYN or the pharmacy. But whatever you do, don’t give her Vagisil for V-day.

DH: Hold her hand, tell her to sit down, and be like “Damn woman, your vagina smells!” Or wait, don’t do that. That’s too rough.

A more subtle way of telling her would be adding a couple of songs to the sex playlist. When she asks you why you’re playing “We’ve

Got the Funk” and “There’s Something in the Air Tonight” during sex, explain the situation. If you don’t have a sex playlist, another way to solve the problem is to use the finger trick. Let me explain.

Stick a finger down there for a few seconds. Once your finger has acquired the odor, gently caress her face with your hands, making sure to linger that finger under her nose. It’s foolproof!

Q: My boyfriend says he loves me, but I’m not sure if I love him. I think I do, but how do I tell if I truly love him too?

AP: There is no way to know if you just don’t. My guess would be that you love him but you’re not in love with him. Yes, you may care about him deeply but something is evidently holding you back from falling completely in love with him. If you want to be with him, you need to figure out what that is and clear it up with him. Don’t feel bad about it though, it’s not your fault, you can’t help the way you feel.

DH: Love is not something that just comes along; it’s a choice. At first, there is a lot of passion going

on where you can’t get enough of each other. It’s a romantic feeling that makes you give foot rubs, buy gifts and makes you hold your farts in around each other.

But just like your looks, your ability to hold your pee in and your love for pop music, this feeling fades over time. Love is a choice.

You can love anyone! When you decide to love someone and say you love them, you need to back it up with actions. Do you scratch his back, even though he has back acne? Do you cook him dinner?

Do you do the freaky things in bed that he likes? If you do these things already, or would do them, then you love him.

Q: I told my boyfriend I had 14 previous sex partners and he was pissed. I don’t think that’s fair. What’s the normal number of partners that a 20-yearold should have? And why is it bothering him? I’m with him now.

AP: How do you not know the rule of three? When a woman is asked how my sexual partners she’s had, she should divide it by three to avoid looking like a slut. And when a man is asked the same he

usually multiplies his number by three because he wants to seem like a player. However, if you do know this rule and have applied it in the previous situation, you really are a whore. No offense.

DH: Damn, you’re a slut! Just kidding! But seriously, why would you tell him how many guys you’ve been with, especially when the answer is 14? Even though guys ask how many, they don’t really want to know. Any number you say is too many. Honesty is good, but not 100 percent of the time. It’s kind of like George Clooney’s pubes—it’s a gray area.

Every girl has asked the question “Does this dress make me look fat?” If guys were 100 percent honest, we would be in World War III right now. If his penis is average size, don’t tell him! Don’t run your mouth without a filter, and be considerate of his feelings.

And quit being a whore!

Got a pressing personal or academic question? E-mail it to ubgeneration@gmail.com or text it to 716-2010GEN. Sound answers are not guaranteed

Cool campus jobs: UBTV director

By Kathryn Przybyla You have all been waiting for it. SATV is back in a whole new form; UBTV, a new UB-only channel pairing up the undergraduate Student Association and the Spectrum. We sat down with the newly hired director of UBTV, Danny Pittelli, a senior media studies major, to see what he’s got planned and if we will get more drunken “Main Street Confessions” this time around.

What is your job title and what does it entail?

I am currently the UBTV director.

I am in charge of keeping track of all of the station’s projects, assigning work to staff members, holding meetings, and approving content for air.

Why start UBTV up again?

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UBTV started up for several reasons. [SA President Ernesto Alvarado] believed it would be a good way to keep students informed of SA news, now that they have gotten rid of Visions.

After we were suspended for budgetary reasons, there was still a strong student interest to bring it back as an outlet for creative content. My friends and I felt as though we never reached our potential with the station and would like another chance to do so.

What kind of challenges do you expect to face?

Well we are currently starting over. The pro-staff member who used to be in charge of the station has moved on. We are in the process of setting back up all of our equipment and processes.

It’s definitely a “learn on the fly” thing. We are trying to rebrand ourselves so that everyone in the dorms and on campus knows they can get their news, as well as enjoy creative programming from us.

Do you watch?

think

people

will

Yes. We have had success in the past with our show, “Main Street Confessions,” which we intend to bring back once the weather gets a little nicer. We are also going to focus our news program more on UB and local news as opposed to random world news as we have done in the past. I believe this will attract many students who don’t always feel like picking up the Spectrum but would like to know what is going on around campus. We also plan to cater Continued on page 19 GENERATION February 9, 2010

edible material Chow Chocolat The art of chocolatiering

By Joshua Bach To many it’s a dessert, to others a delicacy, but for some, chocolate is a favorite form of leisure. Enter: Chow Chocolat.

Walking in the front door is like walking into another realm. The echoes of smooth music fill the room and smells of artisan chocolate and espresso unite to permeate the air. Biting into one of their artisan chocolates causes your mouth to ascend to a climax, intensified by the mix of perfected flavors and a velvety textures melting over your palate.

Artisan chocolatiers Scott and Jaclyn Wisz established Chow Chocolat in 2008.

The duo are experts in handcrafting unimaginably balanced blends of European chocolate and natural flavors into unique and tantalizing creations. As the only true artisan chocolaterie in Buffalo, they offer over 20 varieties of handmade bon-bons in divine flavors like chai tea, jasmine, curry, and champagne (for Valentines Day), and an array of handmade custards, mousses, French pastries, and several handcrafted beverages.

But what makes European chocolate the best? Scott explained that American chocolate contains up to 35 percent wax, but European chocolate is pure chocolate. As a bonus, the Wisz’s socially- and environmentally-friendly conscience ensures that each of their coffee-based beverages are made from fair trade beans, and served in recycled biodegradable cups—their straws and cold cups are made from corn, rather than the conventional plastic.

But Chow Chocolat is more than chocolate—it’s an unrivaled experience combining chocolate, art, music, and dance.

A local Buffalo artist is invited to display his or her artwork within the chocolaterie for one full month as a way of promotion.

And at Chow Chocolat, this calls for a celebration. Each new artist is greeted with a party of wine and hor d’oeuvres, giving the artist an opportunity to introduce their work while mingling with the locals. Propinquity: A Passion of Place by Dr. Mark D. Donnelly will be showcased through the end of February.

This local chocolaterie chose Tango and Salsa as their dances of choice and offers lessons for all those interested in learning.

They offer a Tango dance lesson for $5 on Monday nights, starting at 7 p.m., followed by two hours of open dancing. On Wednesday nights, they offer a Salsa lesson for $5 starting at 7 p.m., again followed by two hours of open dancing. Ending a stressful week is easy to do at Chow Chocolat where you can enjoy dessert and Salsa dancing on a Friday night with friends from 8 p.m.

to midnight.

Everyone with an appetite for exceptional chocolate and a desire to showcase their Tango and Salsa abilities should make their way down to Buffalo’s one and only authentic chocolaterie, Chow Chocolat.

Chow Chocolat is located at 731 Main Street, Buffalo.

Lover’s brew

By Jennifer Peters

Tipping back an ice-cold beer isn’t the first thing that comes to mind when you think about Valentine’s Day, but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea. Here’s a cute pairing of beers to satiate both his and her palette. But please, 21 and over only.

For Her:

For Him:

Lindemans Framboise Style: Lambic (Fruit Ale) Brewer: Brouwerij Linderman’s City: Vlezenbeek Country: Belgium Decription: This Belgian Lambic comes to you from the Senne Valley. It is produced at Lindemans farm brewery from a base of barley and wheat. After wild fermentation, the beer is aged in oak barrels. Fresh raspberries are added to create a secondary fermentation.

Even if you’re a lady who doesn’t usually enjoy beer, I guarantee you’ll like this one.

Served: Champagne flute Cost: $6.99 at Consumers Beverages or Wegmans

St. Bernardus Abt 12 Style: Belgian Strong Ale Brewer: St. Bernardus Brewery City: Watou Country: Belgium Description: This is the absolute top quality in the hierarchy of the legendary St. Bernardus beers. It is also the beer with the highest alcohol content (10.5 percent). The Abt 12 is a dark ivory-colored beer with a high fermentation and is the showpiece of the brewery. Thanks to its soft and unconditionally genuine aroma, the beer tastes extremely smooth. The Abt 12 has a very fruity flavor. This is a beer you sip, not chug.

Served: Brandy glass Cost: $10 for a pint at Consumers Beverages

Notes from the (under)Ground

By Melissa Wright

T

he original point of departure for this exploration came from a suggestion to survey the Buffalo underground music scene. In the conversations that followed, it became apparent that either I was talking to all the wrong musicians or that “underground” needs some teasing out. Perhaps, most importantly, the concept of underground is limited in its cultural temporality, seeming to have specific ties to ’60s counterculture, ’70s punk rock and ’80s hip hop.

So this investigation evolved into an interest in two specific questions: if we’re all above ground now—at least in Buffalo, for that matter—is there an interest in remaining “counterculture”? And secondly, can there be an authentic music anymore when everywhere we have sampling, pastiche, cover bands, and throwbacks?

Three India Pale Ales in, I stand frontand-center to watch a local band at McGarrett’s, formerly No Names, on Elmwood.

The only people closer to the band than me are a hip-rotating, music-lovemaking, engrossed young woman in overalls and a man hanging over the threshold that separates the band Family Dinner from the bar crowd. His eyes are magnetized by Luke Bennett, the lead guitarist’s hands sliding through a song called “The Spaniard.”

“The Spaniard” is fresh and foreign. Invitingly it descends a full scale to a common, unmistakable riff. A trumpet slices through with the most pleasing sort of unexpectedness: something not so far from jazz—dare I say Miles Davis—in its controlled bursts.

Around the bar, one gets an unmistakable sense of ’60s nostalgia, whether that be from the hung tapestries behind the band, the occasional Grateful Dead T-shirt, or counterculture vibe of the place overall.

The façade of the venue begs of a former generation and one can’t help but question whether the bands feel a sense of historical suffocation. Don’t you want your own generation?

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“It’s more than a nostalgia for the ’60s,” Bennett begins as we discuss the Buffalo music scene and where his music fits in.

“More than anything else, that time was the roots, an inspiration. We’re not simply covering old Grateful Dead songs like other bands are doing.”

And yet, I ask, what are you doing? So many bands in Buffalo seem to be playing fusion jam music. And by fusion, I mean a kind of sampling of multiple different genres. Do you feel the sense that you’re not doing anything new?

Bennett shakes his head in fervent disagreement. “That’s what anyone says before the next musical genre happens.

After jazz, they probably thought, ‘what can come next?’ The same thing for jam bands. It’s impossible to tell inside of our own time period. And I think we are doing something new. Fusion is new and every band that’s doing it in Buffalo, from what I’ve seen, has their own sound—U-MELT does progressive groove, Universe Shark does jazz/space jam, we do blues/funk jam, New Clear Fusion did big band funk jam, and the Funky Beats do actual rock ‘n’ roll jam.”

The Family Dinner is truly a part of a network of musicians and bands throughout the Buffalo area. Together, they share jam spaces, instruments, amps, and even swap musicians. The effect is an ever-evolving sound and an intimate music-watching experience, where quite often the line between friend and fan is blurred. In the jam band tradition, these groups plan smallerscale festivals throughout the year, showcasing both local bands as well as any big name band they can get on the bill. And yet, they are determined not to play backyard festivals for the rest of their careers.

Family Dinner is throwing their second summer festival in June and was lucky enough to get some pretty large names on the bill. “We’re very excited to have The Breakfast and Giant Panda Guerrilla Dub Squad playing at our festival, JAM-Boree this summer,” says Derek Morgan, one of the band’s informal booking agents/ “groupies.”

“We’re not underground, because we want to make it,” Bennett says. Fancy that.

I ask whether he considers his band to be fulfilling any kind of ’60s counterculture tradition.

“Counterculture didn’t arise in the ’60s.

In the ’20s there were flappers, in the ’40s there was jazz, Django Reinhardt, in the ’50s, with the invention of the electric guitar, you have Chuck Barry, Little Richard, Elvis Presley. When punk music came about, when heavy metal took off— anything that goes up against mainstream America is counterculture.”

I explain to both Bennett and James Gaydos, the bass player for the band, the angle of my story. Gaydos works part time for a local production company called North Star Media Studios, started right in Buffalo and led by a couple of Canisius alumni. I thought he would have insight as to whether there was anything “underground” in the city.

“Did you laugh when they asked you to cover it?” Gaydos questions with a wid-

ening grin. “There is no Buffalo underground.”

Bennett chimes in. “We’re not in the NYC rap scene where Eminem and Immortal Technique can push out ‘underground shit with Stan.’ ” Gaydos offers his stance on my countercultural dilemma. “There’s always going to be a crossover between whatever countercultural scenes there are going on at the time. With all the various types of music I’ve played, I’ve partaken in whatever was the most happening scene for the region,” he says. “I want to be where the thought, imagination, and invigoration is; so yeah, I have been somewhat of an opportunist in my musical career. I played metal festivals in Cleveland and I play jam band festivals in Buffalo, because that’s what’s going on

in each town. Jam bands are pretty much the scene all over the Western New York area. All the bar owners are dead heads and you have to be in good with them if you want to play around here.”

Seems ironic—the counter culture is now the dominant culture?

“Hippies are capitalists. It’s very much not a counterculture. It’s simply another scene. Things that were once countercultures quickly become mainstream,” Gaydos says. “Hippy culture now is hippy storefronts more or less. There’s all kinds of places back in Cleveland that are another fucking Hot Topic, except they’re not a chain.”

So can we even say there are counter Continued on page 11 GENERATION February 9, 2010

Underground continued cultures anymore?

“Things spread too quickly,” Gaydos says, arranging his bass to head out for a practice session. “We’re obviously a YouTube generation and little 15 second clips fly across the country in seconds. Everything is immediately commercialized.

When the indie emo scenes were emerging, it didn’t take long before people were wearing tight jeans and riding an old bike around.”

Perhaps this is the thrust of the frustration—radical façades with completely mainstream tendencies, the absorption of real musical difference into a homog-

enous stream of ready-made culture.

Before Bennett and Gaydos take off, I ask whether they feel stifled by the musical scene they predominantly belong to.

“None of us are bound by counterculture influences,” Gaydos says. “There’s tons of old bikers at festivals, punkers at SlyFest.

There were some dudes who looked like they were right out of a Slipknot show, rocking snake bite double lip piercings and chest pieces. Dude looked like he was ready to start throwing some bows, but really he was just trying to sell some pot.”

ups and downsizing of punk The

By Jason Davis The Swellers want you to listen and learn.

“There is always light at the end of the tunnel and things don’t just get better, you need to work hard to make them better,” says drummer Jonathan Deiner. He hopes fans take that message away from the band’s latest album, “Ups and Downsizing,” released in September on Fueled by Ramen, home of bands like Fall Out Boy, Cobra Starship and Gym Class Heroes.

Jonathan, along with his brother, guitarist and lead vocalist Nick Diener, guitarist Ryan Collins and bassist Anto Boros, formed the punk/alternative quartet eight years ago as a cover band. The Flint, Mich. group finished a three-song demo in three days, eventually landing a spot on the Vans Warped Tour.

“Ups and Downsizing” opens with “2009,” a track about that exact moment when you realize that people in your life will let you down; about living your life for you. The song is all about resolutions, Collins says. The Swellers’ resolutions for 2010 are “making things bigger and better, being added to a major headlining

tour and building on what’s already been planned so far,” he says. A European tour and short stint on Warped Tour are already in the works for 2010.

The band’s musical tastes extend beyond the Warped Tour scene; Anto says his iPod holds an eclectic mix; “Team America, Spice Girls, Backstreet Boys, Ashlee Simpson, Hilary Duff, and Jamiroquai. But we don’t listen to that regularly, of course.” Their taste in food is offbeat, too—Nick and Jonathan are both serious vegans; their go-to vegan staples are Thai food and crispy tofu in a peanut orange sauce. “It’s not too hard when your girlfriend is a vegan pastry chef who makes the most amazing pastries,” he says.

Jonathan sums up the band’s sound in three words: “Super. Fucking. Awesome.”

They make music “because it’s a therapeutic release and it’s fun.”

“The best thing in the world is making memories and we are lucky to do what we love for a living,” Jonathan says, quoting Billy Joel, “If you are not doing what you love, you are wasting your time.”

Download: 2009, Ups & Downsizing, Fire Away. ubgeneration.com | 11

qwertiopasd Valentines Day Survival Guide

By Kathryn Pryzbyla

Caution: the most romantic day of the year is almost upon us. Are you prepared? Whether you are completely committed to your pookie or celebrating single’s awareness day, there are plenty of things to do and places to see in Buffalo. We’ve taken care of all the hard work for you and compiled a Valentine’s Day survival guide complete

Aphrodisiacs Aphrodisiacs, named for Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of sensuality and love, are substances believed to increase sexual desire. Try some of them on for size to get you and your honey in the mood for love.

Cook with these at your own risk: Cinnamon, Avocado, Basil, Chocolate, Almonds, Bananas, Garlic, Honey

Sweet stuff Listen up: Flowers and a chocolate box from CVS are pretty lame. Get creative and spice things up this year by surprising your sweetheart with some truly sweet gifts: • Personalized M&M’s For $34.99, you can personalize your M&M’s in any color with your own message. It arrives all wrapped up in a gift box with three 7 ounce bags of candy. For $3 more you can add your picture on the M&M’s too. (mymms.com) • Send a pantygram Send some romantic heart-shaped lace panties to the lover of your choice. For $24.95 you can send panties with an anonymous personalized message. Use a sample message from the Web site or get inspired and write your own.

Sexy. (sendapantygram.com)

with date ideas, unique gifts, romantic ideas, and local flower shops. This is your bible of romance, so take advantage of it. And remember, it’s perfectly acceptable to do nice things for your significant other during the other 364 days in a year, so don’t throw this away when the holiday is over.

FLOWERS Surprising your loved one with a dozen red roses is always a classic. But getting them delivered in a public place with lots of friends around makes it even better.

Hit up these flower shops for the best pistils and petals in Buffalo: • A Blooming Place [2307 Millersport Highway, Getzville] (716) 639-9680 abloomingplace.us • Plant Place and Flower Basket [1061 Niagara Falls Boulevard, Amherst] (716) 838-3400 plantplaceandflowerbasket.com • American Beauties Florist [300 Kenmore Avenue, Buffalo] (716) 836-1000 americanbeautiesflorist.com • Valentine’s Day toilet paper Show that you truly care with “I love you from top to bottom!” and other assorted messages printed on a roll of toilet paper, $14.95 for one roll. (justpaperroses.com) • Romantic message in a bottle Proclaim your love the old fashioned way with a personalized message up to 100 characters, rolled up into a lovely little bottle for $14.95, or channel your creative side and make one yourself. (personalcreations.com) • Hand-dipped strawberries The Village Desserts bakery in Williamsville specializes in wedding cakes and treats, so you know these have to be good. (villagedesserts.com)

sweet n local You exchanged gifts and had a delicious heartfelt dinner, so now what? End the night with one of these romantic events.

The Star Sweetheart Ball Feb. 12 8 p.m. to midnight Dance the night away at this strictly 21+ event that includes a full open bar. A VIP Valentine ticket includes early admission, champagne greeting and romantic Valentine’s Day dinner. Tickets are available online at buffalogala.com. A portion of the proceeds will benefit The Make-A-Wish Foundation of Western New York. General Admission Tickets are $50 per person. VIP Valentine tickets are $100 per person.

Kleinhan’s Music Hall Feb. 14 3 p.m.

Classical Music by violinist Noe Inui, playing Mozart, Brahms, Stravinsky and Szymanowski. Free to the public.

Irishman Pub and Eatery Feb. 14 5:30 p.m. to 8:30 p.m.

Jazz music by Robert White.

Lancaster Opera House Feb. 14 2:30 p.m.

Watch a special performance of Love Letters, starring Linda Pellegrino and Jon Summers, based on the pulitzer Prize-nominated play. Admission is $12.

Buffalo Auto Show 2010 Feb. 14 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.

Come witness the hottest new models of automobiles before they even hit the showroom floors at the Buffalo Convention Center. Featured specialty cars this year include the Custom Camaro, Infiniti M35/M45, Chevy “Black Widow”, and Jaguar XJ. Tickets are $8 at the door.

All the single peoplE For all the single ladies out there, here are some ideas to spend Valentine’s Day if don’t have a significant other. ‘Cause if he liked it, he shoulda put a ring on it.

• Throw a ready-to-mingle party for your single friends.

• Hit the bars; its one of the busiest nights of

the year.

• Treat yourself to a day at the spa. Who knows, the masseuse could be cute.

• Buy yourself a box of chocolates. Yes, it’s totally OK. We won’t tell.

• Enjoy the fact you did NOT spend, on average, over $100 on candy and flowers.

fall for THE FALLS

MOVIES

Here are 10 romantic movie options for a cozy night in:

• Casablanca – the classic love story.

• The Notebook – the new classic love story.

• Titanic – we can never let go of Leonardo DiCaprio.

• A Walk to Remember – bring tissues.

• P.S. I Love You – bring LOTS of tissues.

• Beauty and the Beast – they always fall for the bad boy.

• Love Actually – intertwined love stories and British accents.

• Under the Tuscan Sun – Italian romance, need I say more?

• Something’s Gotta Give – old people falling in love and Diane Lane’s turtlenecks.

• The Wedding Date – hey, male hookers can fall in love too.

Or venture out in the cold for the latest addition to the romantic comedy list, “Valentine’s Day” the movie, from the director of “Pretty Woman.” Starring almost every A-Lister in Hollywood, the movie follows the intertwining storylines of a group of Los Angelinos as they find their way through romance over the course of one Valentine’s Day. Opens Feb. 12.

LOW COST Lovin We can’t forget that we’re still a bunch of broke college students. These heartfelt gestures will woo your valentine and keep your bank account from seeing red.

• Handwritten love notes, personal and better than an e-mail.

• A romantic homemade dinner and dessert by candlelight.

• The ever popular mix CD, filled with

John Mayer and Michael Bublé.

• Make your own love coupons, as crafty as you would like to get.

• Borrow a famous love poem and send it to your sweetie—it worked for Big in the “Sex and the City” movie.

If all else fails, recreate any Kay Jewelers commercial… it’s in the bag.

Despite its decrepit American vantage point, Niagara Falls is still considered the honeymoon capital of the world; over 50,000 honeymooners make Niagara Falls their post-wedding destination every year. Get carried away with

old-fashioned romance by visiting this wonder of the world. Almost every hotel and bed and breakfast has a honeymoon suite. Just fake a quickie wedding and enjoy the perks.

Full disclosure

By Keeley Sheehan

F

our friends casually sit in the living room, the space alive with discussion. Everyone’s engaged, with a seriousness that suggests politics or perhaps the economy.

“You can’t use your teeth,” one of them says. Another says you have to tease a little.

But academia doesn’t have the conversation flowing—they’re discussing the finer points of giving head.

“One of my roommates is a virgin and she said, this guy she’s with, ‘I want to give him head, but I need some advice. What do guys like, what should I not do?’ ” says UB student Roxanne, 21. “We’re just sitting there having a conversation like we’re talking about shoes or something.”

College students talk about sex.

But they might not be talking about it as much as they should.

A 2007 study from Trojan Brand Condoms ranks UB as 86 out of 139 universities, based on polls from the universities’ student health centers. UB was ranked 52 in 2006. Trojan gave each university a GPA based on their ranking—UB got a 2.64 that academic year.

The numbers reflect a familiar, persistent problem, one that may be spurned on by the ways we talk about sex—and the ways we don’t.

“Sex is talked about in a covert way, in small groups, behind closed doors,” says Amanda Hibbard, supervising counselor for SBI Health Education, and a senior biomedical science major.

“If [students] can’t talk about it, it’s doubtful they’re going to be doing it safely.”

THE ATTITUDE WITH WHICH we approach sex has a lot to do with our individual experiences, says Kayla Maryles, events coordinator for SBI Health Education. It depends on our age, background, maturity level—a person’s major could even play a part; art majors, nursing majors, psychology majors—everyone has a different perspective.

“I used to talk [about sex] more before I wasn’t in a relationship,” Roxanne says. “But now I’m in a relationship and a lot of my friends are not in a relationship … so I don’t feel comfortable talking to them about sex. I don’t want them to feel like, ‘she has a boyfriend; she’s getting it all the time. I’m miserable, I just got broken up with.’ ” She has an easier time talking to her male friends, she says, and they can talk about anything—lu14 | ubgeneration.com

bricants, condom options, health risks. “I find that the conversations are more mature than they were a few years ago.”

Talking about sex hasn’t always been that easy—especially with her boyfriend. “With guys that I dated in the past … we’d do it, and then we wouldn’t talk about it. It would be a mystery. Did he really like what I did or was he pretending? We didn’t have that open line of communication,” she says. “But with the guy I’m with now, we’ll talk about sex before we have sex, we’ll do it, and then after we have sex, we’ll talk.”

talking about the facts,” Hibbard says. She references Asher Roth’s once-popular frat party anthem, “I Love College.” In the song, he offers some not-so-sage advice; “when it comes to condoms put two on,” he sings. Hibbard rolls her eyes. “The friction will break both of them,” she says.

“Just because the images are out there doesn’t mean it’s a conversation,” Fischer says. “You’re throwing something out there— there’s no discussion, there’s no analysis of what’s going on, there’s no exchange of information.”

BUT NOT EVERYONE HAS an easy time talking about it, says Jane Fischer, director of SBI Health Education. “They feel comfortable enough to get into a physical relationship with them but not to have the conversation about concerns or history or protecting themselves and protecting each other,” Fischer says. “There are million-dollar studies about why our culture addresses sexuality the way it does and why people do the things they do.”

There are a lot of societal factors working against young people, and even more at stake. Our society functions on the basis of a split between what our parents want us to know about sex and what the media forces down our throats.

“In one way we’re a puritanical culture in all of the abstinencebased education funding of the last decade or so,” says Fischer.

There’s an attitude, particularly among parents and school administrators, that teaching students about sex, especially middle school and high school-aged students, is a green light for debauchery.

On the other hand, Fischer says, our society’s media culture is extremely sexualized, sending a mixed message about the do’s and don’ts of sex.

“Sex is talked about in popular culture but its talked about in a way that glorifies it without

A QUICK STROLL AROUND your typical college campus should clue you into the fact that college kids are talking about sex. But these conversations are often riddled with misinformation, holes filled with humor and secondhand stories. “It’s a very intimate thing, and I think anytime you’re dealing with a topic that involves intimacy and vulnerability, people don’t want to talk about it,” says Kristine Huber, assistant director of SBI Health Education.

“With sex it becomes exacerbated by the fact that there’s a lot of negative messages out there.”

Sex gets a bad rap in the public sphere—it’s immoral, it’s bad; one wrong step and you’ll have nine months until your 18-year jail sentence starts. “From a young age, we’re given a lot of different messages, that people who have sex are dirty or promiscuous; they have bad reputations,” Huber says. “Sex is taboo. We don’t talk about it, a lot of families don’t talk about it.” Parents don’t talk to their kids about sex enough, leaving them ill equipped to deal with the onslaught of college freedom outside the loving, abstinenceonly embrace of many high school health education programs.

“I’m Dominican [and] in Latino culture, the girl is supposed to be pure and innocent … I remember when I told my mom I lost my virginity, she almost went ballistic on

“Just because the images are out there doesn’t mean it’s a conversation.”

- Jane Fischer, director of SBI Health Education

GENERATION February 9, 2010

“I think a lot of people our age feel invincible, when in reality, you’re not an exception.”

- Kayla Maryles, events coordinator for SBI Health Education me,” Roxanne says. “There was that conflict in me—especially after I lost my virginity—it’s like I’m not pure anymore, it’s wrong that I’m like this … I would say that to myself, that this is wrong and I don’t know how to not be like this; it feels so natural.”

She was eventually able to put aside her inner discord, deciding that there’s nothing wrong with wanting to have sex. But the conflict she talks about—and the sometimes-clumsy way families deal with sex—is familiar.

“You didn’t hear anything about it and then one day in sixth grade you had to go to this movie which showed you what’s going to be happening to you … I remember it being more embarrassing than anything,” says UB student Adam, 22, adding that his parents never talked about sex with him much. “It was never a prevalent thing in my life, really, until I got to college and everyone was like, ‘you’re in college now, you have to lose your virginity,’ or, ‘you’re in college now, you have to…,’ certain peer pressures.”

Some parents and schools think it better to shield their kids.

“They explain all the results and things that can go wrong,” Adam says. “You get kind of intimidated by the people just bringing all this information at you at one time … but they sidestepped the actual act.” And in turn their kids—off at college and having sex despite their parents’ best efforts to keep them on the “not until marriage” path—don’t talk about it with their partners.

“I don’t know much about sex from a girl’s standpoint. I’m not going to try to pretend like I do.

But I know at least the experience I’ve had, people I’ve seen, it’s been… I’m generalizing, but most women don’t see it as something that’s just something to throw away,” Adam says. “It’s something that means something. So if one guy is sleeping with five different girls … it complicates itself.

I have a problem with doing that and just being like, whatever, and then walking away.”

He doesn’t boast with his male friends about sex, he says. They’ll talk about their problems, sometimes their experiences, but he has a certain level of respect for sex and the people he’s been involved with.

“I think most guys view it as a contest,” Adam says. “It seems like too many people are too focused on trying to get as many people to sleep with as possible, and if that’s the way they want to look at it, that’s fine … It’s easy for

people to talk about it but not really talk about it, because they’re just shallow relationships. They’re shallow connections they establish and then they’re gone.”

LOVE TAKES A BACKSEAT to sex more often than people might like. “What people want to believe is you have to have love for sex,” Maryles says. “I think it’s a misconception. It depends on your definition of sex, your definition of love, you definition of marriage, your definition of safe.”

“I don’t find a problem with it if a girl has slept with I don’t know how many guys. They shouldn’t be judged on that because everyone should have the possibility of having sex with whoever they want, as long as they’re staying healthy and they’re being careful,” Roxanne says. “You don’t want to fuck up when you’re in your teens or in college and then have to live with it for the rest of your life.”

Many organizations, SBI Health Education included, have had success passing on correct information through peer counseling programs, with peer educators spreading credible information in and out of the office. “I definitely get asked questions by friends all the time about everything under the sun,” Hibbard says of the open environment that’s evolved between her and her friends. “They’ll crack jokes to make themselves feel more comfortable with it. Then they’ll ask a question and it turns into an intense discussion.”

But for every fact, there’s a fiction. “Apparently there are conversations going on with little incorrect threads, or not quite correct threads, or incomplete information, too,” Fischer says.

“We just happen to know the people who are being able to intercede in those situations, which means there’s thousands of other conversations going on where they’re not.”

Maryles, a senior health and human services major with a concentration in community mental health, organizes peer-topeer education workshops. She stumbled across the job three years ago after applying for two other positions within SBI Health Education; she tries to reach out to others with different perspectives than her own, to help educate and fight ignorance.

“People are very undereducated. A lot of people think they know it all,” she says. “Even with all the workshops we host, some-

times people are there physically but … they’re not taking it in, not absorbing it. How many times have we heard to use a condom, or the steps to putting on a condom? But people still do it wrong.”

THE AMERICAN COLLEGE HEALTH Association released a study in spring 2007 examining the health-related behaviors of 2,001 UB students between 2006 and 2007. The percentages seem slight. Out of those 2001 students, 2.9 percent reported having genital warts or HPV, .4 percent reported HIV infection, .5 percent reported Chlamydia, .3 percent reported gonorrhea, and .3 percent reported pelvic inflammatory disease.

Do the math. For genital warts and HPV, that’s 60 out of 2001. For HIV infection, that’s eight; 10 for Chlamydia, six for gonorrhea and six for pelvic inflammatory disease—all out of 2001. Now consider that UB has around 19,000 undergraduate students.

Of students who reported drinking regularly, 1.2 percent of males and 2.1 percent of females reported that while they were drinking, someone used force or threats to get them to have sex with them. And 12.9 percent of males and 11.6 percent of females who drank regularly reported having unprotected sex while they were drunk during that school year. Of those students who were sexually active, only 53.6 percent reported using a condom the last time they had sex—7.7 percent of males and 4.7 percent of females said that didn’t use any form of birth control to prevent pregnancy.

“I think a lot of people our age feel invincible,” Maryles says.

“All these statistics seem to be steady, or increasing because our age group, 18 to 24, people think, ‘nope, can’t happen to me,’ when in reality, you’re not an exception.”

Roxanne has learned to make safety a top priority. “I really enjoy having sex, so I’ve always been very careful when it comes to those things,” she says, adding that she always gets tested for STIs before she gets into a new relationship. “Some people [say] ‘I know I don’t have anything,’ but nowadays there’s stuff that you can pretty much get doing anything … Sometimes I’ll be 100 percent sure, but I’m like, no, I’m going to get tested just to make sure; to have that solid proof that Continued on page 19 ubgeneration.com | 15

What are you expecting to get out of Valentine’s Day? Jenni Albrecht Senior Biomedical Sciences “Just a nice simple date.”

Viktor Mashalov Freshman Business “I want to make my girlfriend as happy as she makes me.”

Sean Mccabe Junior Geography “I expect to have a crazy adventure, perhaps backpack to the Andes. Why not? I don’t have any classes that day.”

Jamie Edenholm Sophomore Chemistry “Kittens and dark chocolate sponge candy.”

16 | ubgeneration.com

By Caitlin Kustes

blueprint

Nicholas Musso Sophomore Art “I want pure nonsense; some debauchery, a parade of sorts with unicorns, confetti, diamonds, and many magical happenings.”

Jordan Edenholm Junior Biology “I expect a relaxing night. A cup of tea and a chicken finger sub.”

Ed Beck Senior International Affairs “Stumblingly drunk.”

Annmarie Argiros Senior English “St. Valentine.”

GENERATION February 9, 2010

nickel city

Buffalo’s Prime Real Estate The Darwin D. Martin House

By Joshua Bach

Picture it: Buffalo, 1906, the rain begins to fall. You find a blanket, run over to the row of windows lining your bedroom and open every one. The light breeze begins to trickle in; rolls of thunder begin to resonate within the walls… and all without a drop of rain trespassing the windowpane…

Frank Lloyd Wright was eager to pass on this relationship of unity with nature in all of his incredible architectural accomplishments. The Darwin D. Martin House, one of his greatest Prairie-style buildings, is no exception.

The Darwin D. Martin House, located in the heart of Buffalo’s Parkside district, is the result of a beautiful partnership between two men who met through the Larkin Soap Company—a once-booming mail order company based in downtown Buffalo. Darwin Martin was a boy who grew up during tough times and traveled around the country for a job as a “soap slinger,” but he quickly moved up the ranks to be one of the highest paid corporate executives in America.

Frank Lloyd Wright, just having started his career, ventured to Buffalo to visit Martin after completing a home for his brother in Chicago. Impressed by his work, and having a desire to establish a home for his family, Martin contracted Wright to build him a house. He had no idea that this family home would become Wright’s magnum opus.

Upon completion of the main house in 1905, the cost of the complex had grown to several times more than what Wright initially quoted to Martin, but the finished product was miraculous. Walking up to the glass front door, visitors can peer right through the house—down hundreds of yards through the pergola and the conser

vatory—for a clear view of the Statue of Nike poised at the end.

Elements like the horizontal lines accentuating its continuous flow with nature, the thick capstone base creating the illusion that the house is rising up from the ground, and the 394 Wright-designed windows lining the complex—most famously the design of the Tree of Life—all come together to make this Wright site the greatest of his accomplishments.

The full complex was completed in 1909 and boasted six buildings in total; the main house, the pergola, the conservatory, the gardeners house, the carriage house, and the Barton House. But the journey for these two men and their sprawling complex would be anything but easy after the downfall of the Larkin Soap Company and Buffalo’s troubling economic times.

In 1935, Martin—once one of the richest executives in America—was virtually penniless, and was dying with less than $1 in his bank account and less than $100 in assets. His generous philanthropic tendencies, a substantial loss stemming from a loan to his son, and a considerable thrashing from the stock market crash on Black Friday completely wiped him of all his riches.

This marked the start of the great decline of the Darwin D. Martin house. In 1937, only two years since Martin had passed, his wife Isabelle, having insufficient funds to sustain the complex on her own, packed up her belongings and abandoned the house with no intention of ever returning.

After her departure, the house sat empty until 1955 when Sebastian Tauriello purchased the land and began selling pieces.

The new landowners, in order to make

way for three apartment buildings, began demolishing large parts of the complex, including the pergola, conservatory and carriage house. The remainder of the complex continued to deteriorate. In 1966— with the arrival of University at Buffalo President Martin Myerson, whose dream was always to live in a Frank Lloyd Wright house—the university purchased the house and designated the Martin House as their President’s House.

The university used it as the President’s House until 1982 when the School of Architecture moved into the complex.

In 1991, former UB President William Greiner helped to spearhead the creation of the Martin House Restoration Corporation. The mission of the corporation was to take the now-skewed complex and restore it to its original six building masterpiece.

In 1994, the Restoration Corporation, with cooperation from The Buffalo News, Rich Products and M&T Bank, purchased the Barton house, the last building on the complex not to be titled to the corporation.

The restoration process started four years after the corporation was founded, and has since gone through five phases of restoration—ranging from the foundation to the restoration of the demolished pergola, conservatory and carriage house. In 2006, the last of the apartment buildings were demolished, clearing the way for a true makeover.

The industrial boom that hit Buffalo in the beginning of the 20th century brought the city many influential and historical endeavors, but it did not last. The downfall of industry in Buffalo led many corporations to relocate. Thousands of buildings were left empty or destroyed, including Lloyd’s Larkin Administration Building, and the

city was flooded with displaced workers.

Many people recognize this economic downturn as a completely negative event, but there is a subtle positive side. While many other cities in the United States continued to destroy old buildings to make way for new high rise office buildings and factories, Buffalo stayed stagnant.

But the stagnation allowed Buffalo to preserve a lot of its buildings and has earned Buffalo its claim as an architectural jewel in the United States. People from all over the have travelled to get the chance to tour some of Buffalo’s finest works.

The Martin Restoration Corporation is in the second part of Phase V, which includes restoring the inside of the main house and many of the original Wright windows, which are currently in storage.

When the restoration project is complete, the site expects to be the second largest Wright attraction in the world, attracting some 75,000 to 80,000 tourists a year, just slightly behind Falling Water in Pennsylvania.

Buffalo has shown that it truly is the “City of Good Neighbors,” with countless people coming together to make this project possible. The Darwin D. Martin house is a must visit for everyone living in or visiting Buffalo. Volunteer tour guides offer tours throughout the entire year, by reservation. For a limited time, until Feb. 14, basic and in-depth tours are half-price, at $7.50 and $15.

The Darwin D. Martin House is located at 125 Jewett Parkway, Buffalo, NY, 14214.

For more information call (716) 856-3858. …The rain subsides and the sun begins to peer out from behind the clouds, radiating through the windowpanes, projecting the Tree of Life on every wall in all directions.

Your stance stays still as a grin emerges on your face, and you ask yourself, “where else can you experience such a phenomenal encounter with nature?” The answer is simple… only in Buffalo. ubgeneration.com | 17

campus & region Nick Baxter's

Survival Guide to

W

Dating

ant to increase your chances of hooking up with that special someone (or at least someone who can help you pass the time without making you sick)? Read on.

Survival of the fittest. Never have I understood the meaning of this phrase more than when it applies to dating. As a seasoned veteran of social networking, I can say with confidence that college is one of the best opportunities to meet that “special someone.”

Seldom will you have immense exposure to dating material on a regular basis.

Need more specifics? Try classes, parties and bars. This is what college is all about, and they are all natural watering holes of what we will respectfully and politely call “prospects.” A prospect is any potential person of interest you may or may not have spoken to, but someone you have definitely taken note of and plotted on your POI— your Point of Interest radar.

My intention here is to take what I know, mix in my god-given talents and create a “dating survival guide.”

Throughout the final weeks of the fall semester, I made that perilous journey and I went out

18 | ubgeneration.com

there, where the battle rages, looking for those prospects in their natural habitat. I went where real men do not fear, into territory where the chances of striking out are better than facing Roger Clemens in his prime. I did this for you, my UB comrades, so you can benefit from my mistakes and missteps. I did it all; hitting classes, frat parties, bars and clubs—all in a valiant attempt to figure out what venue works best to meet someone good. I even considered online dating, adding another strategy to my dating playbook. It’s all based on firsthand experience—my first-hand experience.

So for those of you who are looking to date, but are held back by a fear of rejection, I’ll be the answer to your prayers. I’ll give you the tools you need to make the most of one of college’s golden opportunities: meeting someone.

But keep in mind everyone is different. What works for me may not work for you. Either way, the essence of my message remains the same. If you take the testimony I give and add your own spin, you’ll undoubtedly see results. At the very least you’ll know where to go, how to act, how not to act, and maybe even have some idea of what to say to make your dating experience more positive.

So do

your social life a favor before you jump into the dating abyss and take a page from Nick Baxter’s Survival Guide to Dating. It might just bring you closer to what we’re all looking for: somebody to love—forever, for a few hours or somewhere in between.

Don’t bother with bars eeting someone in a bar is about as cliché as it gets. If M you’re looking for someone seri-

ous, bars are a waste of time. But if you’re looking for a one-night stand (not my flavor) you may have something here. There is no better way to discredit yourself than by going around hitting on everybody of interest. And face it; you’re acting in the shallowest way possible. Talking to someone just because you’re attracted to his or her looks isn’t exactly a recipe for success.

Nevertheless, exploring the bar scene was a must on our “guided tour of love.” My bars of choice were Northside and the Steer on Main Street by South Campus. Northside attracts a particular type of person. Looking to meet the woman of your dreams while fighting for a drink and trying to keep your food down, surrounded by the fog of body odor? Then this is your Mecca.

Ah, Northside. I couldn’t help but laugh at the girl next to me who looked like she was trying out for the Green Bay Packers as she tried to grind her date into the sheetrock. I didn’t feel the dance scene vibe that night, so I stepped back and let nature take its course. Luckily, a few familiar girls approached me, giving my night some color. After a friendly gesture from a certain blonde bartender, my night at Northside was a wrap.

I escaped to the Steer and caught up with a few friends, and after awhile, I could see the pros and cons of my South Campus run. I didn’t have to put myself out there to get something back.

If you play it right and you’re regularly social, let the party come to you and run with it. If you’re not, you’re going to have to make like Big Black and “Do Work” if you want your night to be anything but lonely. Bars are fun for one reason: the company you keep. If you don’t bring a party with you, chances are you won’t find one.

Seeing the light with blind dating

B

lind dating is a terrible term that sounds like a bad movie from the ’80s. Oddly enough, it can be very effective. Don’t ever let someone you don’t trust set you up on a blind date. Your fate rests in their hands, and their judgment. The friend doing the set up should deeply consider your compatibility. Your integrity is on the line. If your partner has a bad date, despite your best efforts, it’s your ass.

My blind dating experience was… interesting. A friend who I originally was working with on this story helped me. We set each other up, and honestly, I was excited to do this part of the project.

I love meeting new people, and I was looking forward to sharing experiences on such a seldomused college dating technique.

My date was Angelica; she was pretty and charismatic. We’d met in passing before, but never really talked, so I was game. (Quick dating alert here: Never set someone up on a date with a person who has a past with one of your close friends. That violates my personal moral dating code, and I’d recommend adding it to yours.

Think about it.)

Anyway, Angelica and I had a great time at Average Joes. We had a lot in common, with our small-town backgrounds and experiences with younger siblings.

It was my first trip to Average Joes, and I raised an eyebrow when she insisted on ordering gravy fries, which to me, tasted like Ponderosa on a plate. But I’m open to new things.

My blind-dating experience fell off the edge when a group of unknowingly mutual friends swung by to celebrate some good news.

We clustered into the crew and then didn’t speak much for the rest of the evening. A shame.

I really don’t have anything bad to say about the experience or my date. I wouldn’t really know, thanks to the group of friends who changed the chemistry of the evening, for better or worse. But I do know the burping and cussing

at the table in the larger group is not conducive to getting to know someone. But it started out promising.

So I would highly encourage introverted people who have a lot to offer—but who just take up space in social settings—to give this a try. But remember, you must be open, willing and committed to trying this mystery person on for size. Don’t let down your friend who thought you two might have something in common. Worstcase scenario and your date is an absolute bomb? Look at the silver lining. At least it was a date.

On the edge with online dating nline dating takes guts. You risk the chance of someone O you know seeing your profile

and picking on you for all of eternity. And there is always the chance you’ll meet some sleaze ball who suffocates you with new messages. Regardless, it’s still an avenue that has brought some people dramatic success. Try plentyoffish.com. It’s free, thorough and offers a good selection of local people. Attractive people?

You be the judge. I guess some are on there for a reason.

The cool part about online dating is that if you have a decent profile, people will send you messages. All you have to do is log in and choose. I was short on time, so I was proactive. I cast my lines and waited to see who would bite.

I got a few answers, including one from a stunning girl from Rochester—she’s my newest Facebook friend—and Abby from Williamsville. We talked for a few days and I asked her to get coffee at Starbucks on North Campus. I figured its public, innocent and she can come to meet me. The time for our date rolled around, and Abby was a no-show.

Sure enough, my online dating prospect stood me up. Ugh. A low point. I immediately sent her a message online to see what happened. She answered back later that night and was very apologetic. She forgot, she said. Well, that’s your loss, sweetheart. No soup for you.

More than I bargained for he most innocent venue to meet others is in class. How T many times have you dropped

a pen only to have a cute girl or guy return it with a smile? I’ve actually made a good number of friends in classes one way or another. You can sit near and meet new people every day if you really want to. Consider it a serious suggestion; it may just pan out.

Continued on page 19 GENERATION February 9, 2010

Sex

I’m fine.”

Some of the problems stem from placing too much emphasis on experience over facts. “Just because one person said … ‘I don’t use condoms because this one broke or this one was uncomfortable,’ rather than having the conversation about using it correctly, try a different kind, things like that, the message becomes condoms are uncomfortable and break,” Fischer says.

“So it’s bias of experience, too, and limited experience.”

CONFLICTING MESSAGES HAVE created a society full of people who think they have the right information, but don’t, and who aren’t sure how to ask questions.

“I think talking to your friends [about sex] is productive in the sense that you’re talking about it. Where it’s not productive is that you just need one person to have incorrect information and then it spreads like wildfire,” Huber says. Sometimes the information passed among friends is accurate, but just as often, it’s not.

“I think sometimes people get into a groove where they say, ‘I heard this five years ago… and it must be true, then you ask them, where did you hear that and they have no idea,” she says. “They could have read it in some wacky magazine or Yahoo! chat room, or they could have heard it from their sister’s best friend’s friend.”

One of the most common misconceptions people have about sex, Huber says, involves birth control methods. Many people believe Plan B emergency contraception is an abortion pill. Abortions involve medications that cause the uterus to contract and expel a pregnancy, while Plan B prevents an egg from being released and implanting in the first place. It won’t harm an existing pregnancy, she says; “it’s not even close to being an abortion pill. They’re two totally, totally different things.” Those 18 years or older can buy it over the counter. Those younger than 18 need a prescription from a doctor, but they can get it, which she says is another misconception.

But some misconceptions leave the purely medical realm, running a little deeper, hitting a little harder. SBI conducts panel testing for STIs. Many of the people who get tested, Huber says, do so because they’re getting into a new relationship and want to make sure they’re healthy before they sleep with someone new. But there are also a considerable amount of people getting tested because their partner cheated on them.

“There were actually some people who came in to get tested because they were cheating on their partner and they didn’t really know the people they were cheating with … That was actually an eye opener for me and I’ve worked here for a while,” she says. “One of the biggest misconceptions is [thinking that] it can’t happen to me, that I’m not going to get an STI, that I’m not going to get pregnant, the condom’s not going to break, I’m not going to forget to use my pill.

“You feel like you’re invincible, and nothing bad is ever going to happen to you. Nobody ever thinks they’re going to get raped or be sexually assaulted,” she says. “The biggest misconception is just not having the information and not being proactive about your own health and your own safety; arming yourself with the knowledge that it can happen to you and this is how you prevent it.”

EVERYONE FROM SBI STRESSES the same message: ask questions. Or, as Courtney Bauer, assistant supervising counselor

for SBI and sophomore psychology major, puts it: “Better to know than to have herpes.”

“What’s most important is asking a credible source. There’s no reason to feel ashamed to ask a question,” she says. “If somebody’s really into anal fisting, we say, ‘OK, here’s how to do it safely.’ We are open to any questions about anything.” Her tone is a little facetious but there’s no denying she’s serious. When they come into the office as peer counselors, they check their own moral standards at the door, she and Hibbard agree. No questions are off limits.

They help students deal with “outcomes, consequences, risks—the multitude of factors that come with sex—pleasure, pregnancy, STIs, orgasms,” Maryles says.

Sex is joked about, alluded to, desired, ignored. We want it, we’re scared of it, we seek it out, we brush it off. There’s a dichotomy that exists, between what we want and what we ask for, what we say and how we really feel.

“People are desensitized [but] they’re not used to talking about their own sex lives,” Hibbard says. “You just have to get used to it. It’s not going to happen overnight. You don’t have to talk about it 24/7, but it’s important for people to have an outlet where they can ask questions without feeling judged.”

Bookstore tance to the UB community,” Neumann adds. “We provide funds to many student organizations and set up free raffles and giveaways. That’s not to mention our rental agreement.”

The rental agreement, an experimental program started by eFollett last year, allows students to rent books instead of purchasing them outright. Students can rent certain textbooks for approximately 45 percent of the original price. The program has proven to be popular among students—students rented nearly 4,300 books last semester.

UB is one of a few schools to have the rental option. Of the 860 stores under eFollett operation, only 20 currently have the agreement. Next fall, eFollett is expected to allow renting in nearly half of its stores.

“It’s something that I think we got into because of the competitive market,” Neumann says. “We have to keep pace with other retailers and online stores. eFollett made the decision to rent and it has certainly helped.”

Managers point out that the University Bookstore also contributes to the job market. It employs 38 full- and part-time workers for the whole year. During peak sales, which usually occur before, during and after the first week of classes, it hires approximately 70 temporary employees to accommodate the flood of customers.

The management notes that although students have to get books one way or another, it realizes that the store must provide great service to keep students coming back.

“We work closely with faculty and publishers to get the best possible deals,” Manzella says. “We make a profit, yes, but we want to make sure that students are satisfied with what we have to offer and how we offer it. The best business is repeat business.”

Nick Baxter

UBTV Director

Take it from me. Just recently I’ve made a few friends in classes and even managed to get one girl’s number. Here’s an interesting story: So I saw this girl in a class; cute, seemed intelligent, and I’d spoken to her once. We walked out together as class ended, and just shot the breeze for 15. (I’m a good listener. Have I mentioned that’s a great skill to take on these dating adventures?)

The conversation wasn’t the best, but we talked for a while, so I asked for her number. She gave it to me and suggested we do something in the near future. She then leaned in and gave me an awkward “assout” hug (which still makes me cringe). I walked away feeling socially inept about the hug but noticed I couldn’t remember her name, which to me is a warning sign.

But my gut told me it was Rachel, so I went with that.

We kept in touch throughout the weekend and talked more in class. By next week, her stock was rising… until the next day. She came into class, barely acknowledged me and left class talking to another guy. What the hell? We’d exchanged numbers less than a week before. All was well.

And now I’m not even worth a genuine “hello”?

As a good friend of mine put it, “It’s a wrap for her credentials.” They went right in the garbage.

a little bit to freshman and transfer students by creating small commercials for different clubs around campus, showing what it is that UB has to offer its students.

Nick’s Golden Rule of Dating t’s only fair to point out that was just one negative in a sea of positives. Classes are Ieffective arenas to meet someone because

they’re genuine. When you talk to someone in class, you’re usually not “thinking with your one eye, instead of your two,” (to use a well-known expression) the way you do in a bar. And this idea brings to mind Nick’s Golden Rule of Dating: No matter what, no matter where, your efforts are wasted if your encounters are not genuine. If you’re fake, they’ll feel uncomfortable. They’ll disengage at the first opportunity.

So don’t play games. Never use pickup lines. And don’t be afraid to be yourself.

Remember, dating is like selling. Only you’re not selling fruit baskets, you’re selling yourself. And you will have the most success getting people to “buy” you and the person that you are if you’re “a first rate version of yourself.” That means being honest with yourself, about who you are, what you’re like. Not only will people show you respect for being who you are, but your relationships with them will be genuine and stronger.

Meeting that someone special is about making connections. That’s what the “chemistry” is all about. People connect with you, not the person you’re trying to be. So whether you’re trying to pick up women, make new friends, or find that special someone; make sure you’re a firstrate version of yourself. Good things will happen, or at least they are more likely to happen. I promise.

My dating adventures have led me to one conclusion: Go on a dating binge. It’s almost a lock you’ll find out a lot about yourself, make new friends and learn a lot about people. And if you actually meet someone, that’s a bonus. That’s something you can count on. Take it from me—if I knew before I started my dating binge what I know now, I’d do it all again.

What kind of shows can we expect?

Any shows lined up already?

As in the past we will have a news program, and we will bring back “Main Street Confessions.” We also have some great ideas for a sketch comedy show called “Idiot Box.” “Coach’s Corner” is another idea we’re playing around with. It would involve profiling and interviewing different teams around campus— and not just football. Did you know we have an Alpine Ski team? We are also going to attempt to gain access to tape some of the comedy and musical shows that come to campus and broadcast them for those who may have missed it live.

Where will students be able to watch UBTV? UBTV will be broadcast on channel 46 in the dorms, on-campus apartments, on-campus TVs, as well as Youtube, and they will be linked to the SA Web site.

How will the relationship with the Spectrum work?

Our relationship with the Spectrum is brand new. We are going to sit down and meet with them before we begin to air anything. Our news producer will collect the top stories of the week from each desk at the paper and we will make them broadcast ready. Since we no longer have use of our studio space, the Spectrum has also allowed us to use one of their empty rooms to actually tape the program.

Can students get involved with this project? Who can they contact?

Absolutely. We don’t have any paid positions open, but we are always looking for volunteers and talent for shows. If anyone would like to get involved they can send me an e-mail at dpittelli@gmail.com or stop by our office at 321 Student Union and we can sit down and have a discussion.

When will the initial broadcast be?

Once our server is up and running we will test out the signal and hopefully be up and running before the second week of February.

Why is your job one of the coolest on campus?

I get to make TV shows with my friends and show them to the entire university. What could be cooler? ubgeneration.com | 19

literary Language through music Linear notes on poem

By Eric Schles

Eric Schles + Melissa Wright =

It’s rare to find a moment in the swirling vortex where everything just seems to fit into place. For me that moment is now. The sun is setting, the sky is calm, and someone is playing on the radio; they are singing out soulful and slow. The lights in the distance shine and introspection calms my nerves.

[This first paragraph here—really this isn’t poetry—this is rhetoric, but interestingly applied. Part of me is not entirely sure you believe everything you write.]

I think music comes from the soul, the deeper parts of me that is connected to you. Language is perfected through music.

Words, structure, counterpoint, and timing. Simple concepts, yet when applied, they create the structures of our society. Could anything we have be built without language?

Would you be here? Would I? [Beta/Alf - Alfalfa Fleck]

I think Shakespeare got it right, when he set his plays to tones.

It wasn’t about the tragedy, it wasn’t about the great archetypes; it was about connection.

(Would you be interested in collaboration?)

That’s what we see in him. He reaches out and asks with honest words, will you take my hand and hear my story?

Words, structure, counterpoint, and timing. Simple concepts, yet when applied, they create the structures of our society. Could anything we have be built without language? Would you be here?

Would I?

Connection is what gives us strength. Individuals can enjoy their brooding, I stand with those that prescribe to good company; it’s what gives me strength.

[If we wrote a situation right here, what would it sound like?]

So music, language, really what’s the difference? I can’t see any worth mentioning; if you use these concepts correctly, they do the same thing.

(You hum)

Connection is what gives us strength. Individuals can enjoy their brooding, I stand with those that prescribe to good company; it’s what gives me strength.

Could you send it again? (unless this is it)

So music, language, really what’s the difference? I can’t see any worth mentioning; if you use these concepts correctly, they do the same thing.

Everyone’s a Critic

By Josh Q. Newman I usually don’t plan on getting into theoretical discussions with myself when I go to the movies, but when I saw “The Book of Eli”—a book, by all means, that should be closed—it got me thinking. Watching the movie was a painful experience (try not to wince when Denzel Washington eviscerates someone like he’s scooping a mango), but even more unpleasant was how I watched it.

I couldn’t enjoy it because I pointed out its flaws. The lighting was too dark; the fights were too stupid; the dialogue was too corny; etc. Instead of trying to understand what the movie was trying to do, I focused on what it couldn’t do.

Perhaps Denzel’s flop isn’t the best example, yet when I left the theater I had a set of two unsettling questions: how can I get my money back, and is this really how I should approach art?

The answer for the latter question may seem like an obvious no, but it’s not that simple. Approaching a work of art, which for me, being an English major, is usually a book, requires not only the ability to interpret but also to identify. As many of my professors have stressed, it’s after you pinpoint what the author is doing that you can evaluate whether it’s worthwhile. In theory, it’s not complicated. In theory, good literature can easily be shelved from the bad ones. In theory, the theory should work.

Yet the further you go into some20 | ubgeneration.com

thing and the more you can pinpoint, the harder it is to draw the line between good interpretation and bad criticism. In other words, there’s a tendency among readers to mistake tearing a book apart for earnest commentary. It’s a kneejerk reaction to be harsh.

Think of it this way: have you ever read an English paper or work of criticism that didn’t mention any faults?

Probably not. Many value a book not for what it does right but rather for the sum of its flaws.

I have often caught myself doing this.

Besides the Denzel fiasco (no I won’t let up on it), there have been many books I have read that impressed on me a sense of grueling incompetence. When I read “Paradise Lost” for the first time, I remember getting mad at Milton for making Satan a virtual cartoon character towards the end of the epic. My professor talked about this, suggesting that a fatal fault of the American education system is teaching students what to admonish instead of what to admire – the alternative being to evaluate how the book on the reading list made it on there. Even professors have been guilty. Keats’s “Ode to a Nightingale” is a wonderful poem, yet one of my professors couldn’t help brush it off as decorative hokum, especially the line “tender is the night.” Poor F. Scott Fitzgerald.

The issue begs the question why do critics (and readers) do this in the first place? A Freudian answer might be

that it’s a great boost for the ego, but given that I know nothing about Freud other than most of his theories have been disproven and he claimed that Moses was not, in fact, a Jew, I could be wrong.

No, rather, a better reason might be that it’s a natural reaction to anything that draws from the past. Books, for the most part, are intertextual. They are synthesized from books that have come before it. There has not been a book in modern memory that hasn’t been influenced by something else.

Not to say that books are basically pastiche (or worse, postmodern) but the shadow of other works clearly make some critics uncomfortable. If that influence shows up – if it’s clear that the author used something else – then it’s only natural to pounce on it, claiming that it’s bad writing.

Of course, there are bad writers out there that are bad for other reasons.

There are plenty of theories to support or destroy what I just mentioned. The point is that theoretically, we should make that distinction. It’s hard to do so, however, when we’re taught and read otherwise.

Theoretical backbone and literary analysis are as different as, say, “The Godfather” and “The Book of Eli.” The challenge for us is to use them for constructive ways to interpret a work, and not the usual archaic method of souring art. I, for one, am still figuring it out. And when I do, I plan on revealing it to the world… so it can be criticized.

GENERATION February 9, 2010

Ernest Hemmingway Sexual Mailman is dead

by Michael Fix

by Michael Fix

But he would still like some good, thick bacon, cold beer.

He has a piece of square cardboard,

If there were a talking typewriter, a muted trumpet would suffice.

to cover up his perfect square window

And Ernest Hemmingway is dead.

Like one-thousand Romans,

on his eerily square truck,

a million Spanish soldiers, crouching in tents—crying.

El todo que yo quiero el todo que yo quiero, el todo que yo quiero.

who’s squarely stuck licking old stamps,

Typewriting only Ernest’s remains—all

not knowing freedom: of his silly square truck and backwards release of righted wheels, hands grasping his packages, of facing perfectly,

that is left, the frying bacon, coffee plates spinning, the hidden cracks smashed and frightened, clacking like a, b’s, or c’s keys, lost and uneven in darkening Havana, or Hawaii’s desert.

Even I know that Ernest Hemmingway is dead as the typewriter, silenced, waiting on fingers.

For mother—una mama.

Another plate of good bacon, another frosted glass of clean beer, coldly lighting a cigar, a beautiful dancing

so he can quite satisfy a silent girl

a mis-placed square door to enter too often to ever exit; they can only pretend to be British until the whistle blows and then, sent along.

woman, to slide through her own space.

Ernest Hemmingway is dead and I am eating thick bacon.

Rocking Chair Candy

poetry

By Melissa Wright Committed in-stant-ly to the bar-frame: shoulders-smile-wit electricity cruises, stalls, surrenders doubled over with glee a night to feign with genuine smirks disclose now, before it’s too late! no, yes, kill the “stop” locked here with toes pressing into chest it comes . . .we remember the outside and poke out from the alley.

The Fictitious Politician

By Danielle S. Morgera Portrayed as a savior but working as a sinner; Torturing the masses with slimly smiles brewing a cocktail of greed and graft No sign of derailment until A shift in paradigms and priorities surprisingly caused a sudden change of mind.

Remorse of stupidity and naivety paid a brief visit; then fled leaving only promise and prospect.

Intense efforts to seize and salvage proved futile but fortunate There was vision, then hope. Actuality and action commenced the destruction of the rotting system.

And it was glorious.

from the brick, the mouth, of now-ness immovability flits into a cab charged with more than one can handle

ubgeneration.com | 21

parting shots Where’s the cream filling?

By Jordan Brown It starts with nonstop texting and never wanting to leave the other person’s side, and ends with a gallon of ice cream and slashed tires. At first, she is the hottest girl you’ve ever seen and now you’re disgusted every time you see her face. He was a sweetheart, but now he’s the biggest douche bag you’ve ever met.

Bad relationships: Face it, we’ve all been in one at some point, and if not, give it a couple of months. We always find ourselves questioning how they ended up the way they did, no matter how long they last.

It’s easy to look at the beginning and end, but at times we forget how we got from point A to point B. Sometimes we neglect to acknowledge red flags altogether. No one wants to admit that they saw the signs, which is understandable, but there are always signs—always.

You may have first mistaken her constant checking up on you and calls as cute, but when you can’t sleep without receiving 13 texts and seven missed calls, you start to realize she’s just a “stage five clinger”— to quote Pauly D. You thought his drinking binges every night just made him edgy, you now know he’s in the beginning stages of alcoholism. If he punches anything in sight to “vent his frustration,” don’t be shocked when you’re calling the police about domestic violence. If she says; “he’s just a friend,” don’t be flabbergasted when you find her tongue kissing another dude in the mouth.

This isn’t to say that just because someone has quirks you should put all communication to a halt—everyone has their oddities.

You should put just as much focus on your own actions as you put on your person of interest. Maybe you just aren’t the relationship type if you can’t seem to keep your hands off of every girl you encounter. If all you can ever think, speak and dream about is your ex, then it’s safe to say that you’re probably not ready to commit to something new.

At times, the downfall may not have been so obvious. Maybe time is what made your relationship dwindle. Some relationships are milk and others are Twinkies.

Some relationships get sour after a period of time and others seem to never go bad.

You can’t realistically expect every person you meet to be the proverbial “one,” and every relationship you find yourself in to lead to marriage, because you’re just setting yourself up for heartache.

While it may be easier to extract negatives from something, what’s really best is looking at the positives. To keep with the food metaphors, a relationship is a lot like a sandwich. There are two pieces of bread, but most people like the contents between the bread better—whether it’s meat or soy for the vegetarians. We should look at a relationship for what we enjoyed the most, then take what we find and learn from it for our future ventures.

You have the power to improve the quality of your next relationship, and the power to get lost in the endless cycle of bad relationships.

Throw away the milk and snack on a Twinkie.

22 | ubgeneration.com

United States of Marijuana According to CNBC and ABC News, marijuana is the U.S.’s biggest cash crop.

Growers make an estimated $35.8 billion a year in illegal sales. With that in mind, states across the country have been taking a slice of this pie by legalizing marijuana for medical purposes. The federal and state governments place taxes on the medical marijuana, meaning they make money off the deal.

States that have legalized medical Marijuana include Alaska, California, Colorado, Hawaii, Maine, Michigan, Montana, Nevada, New Jersey, New Mexico, Oregon, Rhode Island, Vermont, and Washington.

Each regulates medical marijuana in their own way, some stricter than others.

The whole process leaves me with only one question… Where is New York?

I might have found my answer. According to Syracuse.com, New York is close to joining the other 14 states by legalizing medical marijuana. Several early versions of the bill have failed, but now legislators seem to be leaning toward a bill modeled after Rhode Island’s plan, let-

ting the patient have up to 2.5 ounces at a time.

Rhode Island prescribes medical marijuana for a broad range of illnesses, according to Pain Management of America.

They include problems like Alzheimer’s, HIV/AIDS, cancer, Crohn’s disease, epilepsy, glaucoma, Hepatitis C, multiple sclerosis, or any debilitating, chronic condition that produces spasms, seizures or severe pain or nausea.

Even though medical marijuana is often cheaper than “street prices,” legalizing it across the board can do a lot of good for our economy. By producing jobs from farming to manufacturing, medical marijuana can give the U.S. economy a shot in the arm. And let’s not forget state and federal tax. If legalized, the cost of the purest marijuana would decrease but the quality would likely increase.

Detractors argue that marijuana is harmful, but they’ve never proved that marijuana kills, though they have established that alcohol and cigarettes do. Here is an opportunity to push a large amount

by Jennifer Peters of money into our economy, yet everyone seems scared to do it. Why? This could also open the door for more extensive uses of hemp, which is a more environmentally safe alternative to paper, clothes, fabrics, ropes, and more.

I think that it’s time for New Yorkers to take a stand. Students who agree with me should join the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws at UB, today. Let’s change our economy together.

Love and Karma Today, and on many, many more days, we should ponder the end of all that is known at our level of existence and the sum of all of our experiences.

As distant descendents from the land of civilization’s birth, we have firsthand knowledge of the progress and challenges of humankind. We have witnessed the birth of children, the cloning of Dolly the sheep and the surgical altering of our bodies to meet current aesthetic trends.

We have changed the shape and power of Mother Earth’s land, lakes and rivers for profitable purposes. We’ve shortened her patience; her children—Hurricane Katrina, the Indian tsunami and the Haitian earthquake—pose to regain control of the planet by shaking loose mankind’s hold.

We love STUFF. We have created greater need for unnecessary products—merchandise and materials that have become dangerous, burdensome and laborious instead of being truly supportive to culture’s needs and demands. There are weapons that can dissolve a human body and leave the infrastructure of a building intact, yet we can’t solve the mysteries of cancer, blindness or baldness.

Our love for money has left the economies of the planet in shambles. Corporations, politics, media barons, and military opportunists battle for control of dwindling resources and dominate the economics of the planet. Corruption has the immediate attention of regular citizens during election cycles and periods of high unemployment. We’ve witnessed a global financial meltdown and the TARP bailout funding to U.S. companies with astronomical CEO salaries and bonuses, while record numbers of Americans are out of work and without the security of a home and the benefits of employment.

Bloggers, pundits and extremists have

polarized opinions, beliefs and values, and media corporations’ persuasions stifle citizens (the underdog), and showcase the odds of corporate favor.

We love distractions, and depend on MTV’s “Jersey Shore” and FOX’s “American Idol” to keep us distracted as entertainers and candidates for re-election hire public relation firms as spin doctors to dismiss bad publicity, rumors and their proximity to embattled organizations.

News of social unrest due to extramarital activities has stolen the stage, bringing Tiger Woods’ other sport in the spotlight, and ushering in a patterned cycle of high profile celebrity stories (Brad leaving Jennifer), public official misgivings (Client 9, Frances Quinn Hunter’s father, Zippergate), and Letterman’s revelations of relations. Sportscasters have not been immune, like CBS’s Jim Nantz and NFL Hall of Famer Frank Gifford, who have had their private relationships revealed to the public. Not-so-popular figures bombard us with their sex tapes, most likely to raise their levels of reference to peak our curiosity or add to their legacy.

We love the Internet, but we’re caught up on pornography, eBay, shopping and Craigslist. Does the Internet offer true connections as eHarmony or Match.com suggest? Can we really hook up with someone in a meaningful way at AOL or Yahoo! Personals?

Are we listening to one another? We all might to be too busy messaging, iPoding, iPad-ing, texting, tweeting, or Wii-ing, and person-to-person conversation and contact may become extinct. Baptism, athletes, court officers, pets, the police, and most aggressors have more physical connections with people than the rest of the population, yet we have next-door

by Abraham C.L. Munson-Ellis neighbors who we haven’t spoken to in 40 years because of some unmentioned issue.

All love is serious. It is time for a change.

It is time for a connection revolution. Instead of following or fearing due to stereotyping, ignorance, stupidity, family upbringing, myths, curses, or blindness of alien persuasion, look into the mirror daily, tell yourself that you love everyone, that you love yourself, and that you will be a better person as you eliminate the ills of misunderstanding and give more patience to what may be unclear.

We have to regain our sense of community, neighborhood and family to strengthen our reserve—so we can produce resolutions and connections, not additional questions or conflicts, so Feb. 14 can be a day when true love unites us all as we save our humanity and Mother Earth, our foundation.

Compassion, assistance, love, and caring on Valentine’s Day, and beyond, can be the catalyst for a better us. Hugs and kisses are accepted—not to dismiss time, money, and support—for those you care for and those you want to know better on this Feb. 14.

GENERATION February 9, 2010

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