7 Things to Grow Spiritually in 2022

from Gentleman's Purpose - January 2022 Edition

Ode to the Potluck

Written by Justin Gaynor

Well Gentlemen, here we are starting another year. We’ve got a couple years under our belt and we have made progress. Some perhaps more than others. As we look to the future, we have an opportunity to ask ourselves the two questions, “What do I do?” and “Who am I becoming?” Our vocation, or calling, is important to know so that we are aware of what sort of problems we can help the world solve, and what kind of value we bring to bear upon it. The vision we have for our lives is vital as well. The Scriptures teach that without vision , a people will perish. So, we must have an idea of where we are headed. In this article, I want to focus on a Greek word the Apostle Paul uses regarding those who are “In Christ”. He says that people who are part of the “2nd Adam”, the New Creation, are becoming “pneumatikoi” which means “Spirit-Driven People”. The first Adam became a living being, but the second Adam became a life-giving spirit. What does it mean to be grow as a life-giving spirit?

1) To grow as a life-giving Spirit, you must first be born-again. Born of water and Spirit. This is in accordance with the teaching of Jesus of Nazareth. Being born of water begins with repenting of your sins. I think the best way to approach this is to schedule a series of sessions with a local pastor or a mature believer and to begin praying that the Holy Spirit would reveal those areas of your life where there is sin, brokenness, and wounds from others. For me, this was about 3 or 4 sessions, between an hour to 3 hours each. Starting with as young an age as you can, simply walk through your story. When you come to a place where you may want to invite Christ to bring healing, do so, if there is something that needs forgiving, simply ask. There may need to be some homework. Conversations you may need to have with certain people, etc. Just allow the Holy Spirit to guide and prompt the sessions.

2) Once you go through this process, if you haven’t already, request that the minister baptize you in water. You and your minister may choose to fast for a period before the baptism, one to three days is typical. It is best to be baptized in living water: a cold stream or river. If that is not reasonably available, it is ok to be baptized in still water: a lake, sea, or baptismal pool. Still, if those options are not reasonably available, have the minister pour cold water upon your head three times, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. The one who has been baptized into Christ, has put on Christ. If baptism is something you have already received at one point in your life, there is no need to do it again. However, you may want to remember your baptism and say a prayer of re-dedication with your minister there as witness and to say the Amen with you.

3) Now that you have been born of water, you will want to seek the gift that the Father has promised, the Holy Spirit. You may ask your minister if he would be willing to lay hands on you and pray for this. You may also gather with a group and spend some time in prayer and worship. A congregation I used to worship with, Calvary Chapel Boynton Beach, had what they called 7 Days of Praise. They organized a week of prayer and worship meetings at 7am and 7 pm each day for 7 days, then on the final evening they would have a huge celebration and worship event. After a week like that it is good to have the elders lay hands on those like yourself who are seeking spiritual growth and empowerment.

4) As N.T. Wright, former Bishop of Durham says, “It’s wonderful to be born again, but then you must get on with the business of living.” The early church devoted themselves to four things in their common life together. The first of which is Apostolic teaching. Each book or letter in the New Testament has been authored by one that has been sent out by Christ for the purpose of teaching “The Way.” There are many approaches to this. First, gathering with the family of God for the purpose of hearing the Word should become something you hunger for regularly. There are Bible studies, worship services, and mass being held in pretty much every town and city in America. If you can’t find one, don’t hesitate to start one.

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There are also a host of online options these days. If you can read Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic it is best to read the Scriptures in their original languages, but if, as with most, you aren’t skilled to do that, get an accurate translation of the Scriptures. I recommend the New American Standard Bible (NASB) or the New King James Version (NKJV). You should soak yourself in the Scriptures this year, filling your spiritual house that has just been thoroughly cleaned with good things. There are many bible reading plans that will lead you through the entire Old Testament and New Testament in a year. I strongly encourage this for all.

5) The second thing the early church (that word, church, Ekklesia, means “Called Out Ones”) devoted themselves to something called “Koinonia”, it is often translated fellowship. Now, this may stir up images of big dining halls with potluck meals and what not, but it is far more than that. It is embracing, together, the oneness that the Jewish people saw in God as they prayed the Shema 3 times daily, and that Jesus asked the Father that we as His Body would experience. It is multidimensional, powerful and empowering, and one of the best ways to grow spiritually. It may start as something as simple as attending a few of those potlucks, but it will become much more when the Holy Spirit is invited into it.

6) Next, speaking of potlucks, the early church devoted themselves to breaking bread together. Yes, this includes large family meals shared in joy and the Holy Spirit. However, it supremely focuses on the Holy Eucharist (Communion). This is the simple meal of Bread and Wine that Jesus shared with His students before His betrayal and crucifixion. It is the meal that Melchizedek shared with Abraham thousands of years earlier, and a meal that the family of God has reverently shared in for thousands of years since our Lord was crucified and raised from the dead. It is one of the supreme mysteries of the faith. I couldn’t tell you how it works specifically, but you will know when you know. He will be revealed to you in that meal.

7) The final of the four things that the early Church devoted themselves to is prayer. It may seem boring to some, but as with the other mysteries of the faith, communicating with God on this level is what true spirituality is all about. A face-to-face conversation with God, walking in the Spirit in such a way that your inward man is constantly in two-way conversation with God. There are all kinds of conversations to be had with God. A good place to start learning more about prayer is to spend time singing, praying, reading, and meditating on the Psalms in the Bible, perhaps choose a few that you engage with regularly. Consider the backstories, what King David was going through when he penned a specific prayer. Psalm 110 for instance, is the most quoted Psalm in the whole New Testament. The early church had that one fixed in their hearts and minds when they considered all that was happening with Jesus, and God, and this New Creation that had been launched.

As we enter into this new year, may the love of God, our Father, the grace of Jesus, the Son, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be ever with us all.

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Relationships

Mourning Together

Written by Justin Gaynor

When you decide to take a woman as your wife there will be all sorts of seasons. There will be amazing times, but there will also be very difficult times. In this article, I want to talk about mourning together. When I think back to the situations with my ex-wife where one of the two of us, or both, experienced the death of a loved one, there is an emotional void. It doesn’t seem to me that we engaged the grieving process very well at all, and I think that was a mistake. Everyone grieves differently, but as the spiritual leader of the home, it is my job, as the husband, to be proactive. I do not recall doing much more than offering a hug, a shoulder, and asking, “are you alright?”. This December, I had a cousin that passed away due to complications resulting from substance abuse. As I go through this season grieving without a spouse, it is different, but not very different. I find that strange. So, what are some things that may be helpful to make sure we grieve well and to proactively engage with the reality of the situation in a healthy way. Then beyond that, what can we learn from our own grieving that will help us be better husbands and fathers in the future.

The wisdom literature in the Hebrew Bible tells us that it is better to go to the house of mourning, than the house of feasting. The author explains that the value in recognizing the brevity of life and the common reality of death that we share with the rest of humanity surpasses the short-term pleasures of celebrating for some inconsequential reason. If Jesus desires that we “be one, even as He and the Father are one”, then the experience of death is certainly sobering common ground from which to start. So, from this, gentlemen, we can learn that while it may be difficult and costly to actually go to a “house of mourning”, it is good to do so, not only for the benefit of the individual, but also for the value in helping to strengthen the unity that the Holy Spirit gives in the bond of peace. This is something that we can help our wives understand, without getting “preachy”, in the process of encouraging them not to withdraw in their mourning, but to be intentional about sharing the burden of it with others. Weeping may last for the night, but joy will come in the morning.

Next, I think that far too many people under utilize their ministers (apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, teachers…as well as deacons & deaconesses) These “priests to the nation of priests” have been found to be wise, full of the Holy Spirit, and proficient in handling the word of God for the purposes of encouragement, teaching, reproof, correction, and training others in covenant faithfulness. They are more than equipped to help you navigate the waters of grieving the passing of a loved one. As the spiritual leader of your home, it is good to recognize where you are in your own spiritual development and to humbly encourage your wife to engage with an ordained deaconess or the wife of an ordained leader. Very often the wife of an ordained minister will have also been thoroughly examined and found to be competent to minister in such situations. If not, or if that simply isn’t her cup of tea, she will likely consult her husband and then direct you to a suitable female minister. Also, consider that your own efforts to encourage your wife, in the Spirit, through the process will be re-enforced through the mouth of the other minister. It is the same Holy Spirit at work, with the Word, in all of us.

Finally, and this is for those conversations that happen between you and her in the secret place. The place the two of you, your wife and you, open most fully to one another. The times you are laying next to one another before falling asleep. When you turn the electronics off and cuddle up on the couch. Wherever or whatever your most intimate times of communication have looked like. Be intentional about increasing the quantity and frequency of that kind of availability during seasons of mourning. Emotional intelligence, empathy, and attentiveness should be priorities and your wife should be able to recognize that you are making yourself more available and more vulnerable, so that she feels safe and comfortable doing the same.