Abodo’s Worst Roommate Ever Survey Results In order to know how to be a good roommate, it’s good to know what roommates report they DON’T want. A 2016 survey by rental company Abodo asked over 2,000 people what were some of their biggest roommate pet peeves. Read over with your roommates to have a good discussion on what YOUR pet peeves are and if there is anything you’d like to amend on your roommate contract. If so, just ask your RA and they can provide you with a copy of your agreement to update! Of 30 common roommate complaints, 2,000 American residents ranked what behaviors they’ve experienced the most and which they’ve been guilty of themselves.
While the survey does not account for all gender-expressions, it did break down offensive behaviors by those who identify as “men” or “women.”
Resolving Conflict with Roommates Written By: Kellianne Curley, Resident Director Looking back on my first year of undergrad, I can say one thing for certain; the disputes my 9 suitemates and I had, molded us into the confident and independent women we are today. The connections we had made through active listening and communication served as the foundation for our relationships with one another. After the foundation of a friendship is made, it does take hard work from all parties to allow growth. It is understood that our values, thoughts and feelings are the driving forces behind our actions, and others make assumptions or judgements based off of our actions, not our intentions. While, our initial understanding of one another serves as an important factor in a dispute with a friend, it is also important to grasp the reality of not being able to control how someone else perceives a situation. The ability to resolve a conflict between you and a friend, coworker, professor, peer, or yourself is a transferable skill that goes beyond ‘getting along with someone just because you need to’. A long term resolution includes self-awareness of your and the other parties own conflict management styles. A resolution or mediation often times can feel like a negotiation of a person’s feelings, and sometimes, that can affect one’s pride or ego. Want to resolve a dispute? Determine what your goals and possible barriers are, create a plan to hold ourselves accountable, and keep your convictions but be open-minded.
Are YOU Being Passive, Assertive, or Aggressive?
IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT CONFLICT Conflict is NOT always bad It is a natural part of life and can be a positive instrument of growth & development. We can have conflicts with ourselves and everyone we interact with. Before addressing a conflict, try to look at the issue from the other person’s perspective. Remember that YOU TOO have to take responsibility for your role in a conflict.
While we would love if everyone reacted to conflict the way we wanted, the only thing we TRULY have control over is OUR OWN reaction to conflict. Make sure that you are taking the time to think about your own reaction and how that reaction could impact others (whether intended or not). Preparing to talk about a conflict before you talk to another person can help you to break down what the issue is, how this issue has impacted you, and what you would like to see happen differently. Taking the time to do this helps to ensure that the conversation is respectful and productive. This article was written by Kellianne Curley, Resident Director for Freedom's Landing on the Statesboro Campus. She has a passion for student success on campus. Always feel free to say hello.
When addressing an issue, give the other person the benefit of the doubt and ask questions that will give you more more context on their perspective. If you have a small conflict, deal with it sooner rather than later to avoid the conflict growing. If you address a conflict in a negative or blame-oriented way, you may have a negative effect. When addressing a conflict, disagree with ideas & behaviors. Ask your RA for Help!