guillozine - issue 11: transitions (a lumière 2019 project)

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Brenna Phi l l i ps Sydney,NS @punchandj i ng l es


j ocel ynl ane new yor k

“ t hesear ebl ackandwhi t e35mm phot ost hatI woul dsayr epr esenthow If eelaboutt r ansi t i on s peci fical l ybei ngi ncol l egeandcomi ngofage/ wi s hi ngi twasl i keat eenmovi e. ”


@j ocel yn. l ane



GI UL I AABBADESSA I T AL Y @ABBAGI . DESI GN

“ I NMYMI NDT HEI DEAOF " T RANSI T I ON"I SBECOMEAST HE RAPPRESENT AT I ONOFMYPERI OD F L OW, T HATCHANGEDAYBYDAYI N COL OR, QUANT I TYANDI TREQUI RES DI F F ERENTTYPESOFPADSF OR EACHPHASE. AL SOGRAPHI CAL L Y T HECOL ORANDT HEDI F F ERENT PI CT OGRAMSARESUBJ ECT EDT OT HE T RANSI T I ON. ”


ADELEKANDARIAN LOSANGELES @LIZARD_ MUSE


XANDERFOS TER COLOMBUS ,OHI O BACTERI UM. BUG





gender synt hesi s ont hecuspof adol escence i swhenif ound vi r t uewi t houtvi r t us sept ember8t h2010: t heanni ver sar y ofmysel f andmakeup eacht i met hi smont h spr out edont hecal endar iwasgr eet edwi t h ar i penewgr ade wher easmostboysmy agespentt hei rsummer f ul f i l l i ngt hei rf at her ' shunt i ngpact s, imademyownwi t ht hemi r r or t heysetsnar es asisetpowder , bot hofusbonded i nexecut i on

bear i ngwi t ness t ononebutme imakemyi ni t i almol t , t heonsetofmyhaunt i ng whenmyeyesmether s f ort hef i r stt i me agl i mpseofhome wasf oundt obemi ne t hei magi nedmader eal shotadr enal i net hr ough ever yst em ofme: gender synt hesi s vi scer alnowvi ct or i ous, anewepi st emol ogy i sbor n;f ound agai nstt hegr ai n dr unkonpr i de, mynewf oundwi ngs gl i demedownt hehal l t omyf at her ’ sden

myt r ophyani mal f oundnoti nt r ees butbet weensel ves: t her hi zomeofenvy

wi deeyedandbr i ght ishowcaset hef r ui t ofmyl abour ,andher esponds: whathaveyougotdonet oyour sel fmyson

cr i spl i nesofsl at e acr osst heeyel i d, orar chi t ect ur eof anal abast r i necompl exi on

t hegl ossi nmyeyedi mmed andir ant owar dt hehal l f l eshsear edi nscor n bl oodboi l edi nshame

det oxi f yi ngmyeyes iunear t hmysel f , becomi ngchi mer a: hybr i d,i mpl ausi bl e,absur d

magi cmut at edi nt omonst r osi t y , icr awlbacki nt omycave vowi ngnevert ol etanot her bur nmef ormybeaut yagai n

encasedi nsi de f ournavywal l s i swher eicommi t t ed myf i r stmur der r i gor ousanddi l i gent dad' sboyi snowdead acr i met r acedi n kohlandr ouge badeadi eut oqual ms wi t heachst r oke f or gi ngmeanew; f acer ever a apost l eandr ogyne t hr oughosmosi si s hei rt oanewf ai t h, cat har si ssanscat hol i ci sm ibegi nt ogr owaki n t ot hepowerofgl ass r eapwhatisow onunchar t edt er r ai n

vi ol etdr ake st .j ohn’ s @vi ol et xdr ake



Tr ansi t i oni ng:Fr om ust ome Today ,Ir eal i zedt hatyouonl yexi st onmyscr een,as Il ookatourol dmessages 4.5.6year sol d. l oveyou&mi ssyou f r equentt hel i nes.Thephot os t akeni nAf ghani st an I nmydr eams,Iam r emi ndedofwhatwehad, whatwecoul d’ vehad. Jul y14t h–aweddi ng t hatneveroccur r ed.Thedance hatwi l lneverbedanced. t Thehei r st hatwi l lneverbr eat hl i f e. I nmydr eams,i t ’ sagi r l .Yourhai r .Myeyes. I nmymemor i es,It r y t or emembert hegood,andt hebad, becauseTom wi t houtJer r yi sj ustacat , andt het hought st hatoncef l owedl i kear i ver , nowbar el ydr i bbl epastt her ocksi nt hei rmur kyst at e TodayIr eal i zedt hatyou ar enol ongermyr eal i t y ,andt hatI st i l ldon’ tknowwhot of eelaboutt hat . I t ’ sbeenusf orsol ong,I am notsur ehowt ot r ansi t i oni nt o me.

Ni kol l eDi xon Okl ahoma @ni kol l edeni se



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