many years are often spent on making the decision to come out. But coming out is also sometimes a simple ‘her wife/his husband’, a ‘I’m X, my pronouns are they/them!’ Why do people’s coming out experiences lie on such a broad spectrum between daunting, sometimes even dangerous, and completely casual? Unlike common media portrayals of the subject, to many members of the LGBTQ+ community, coming out is not a oneoff thing, and the only two options are not merely to be entirely in the closet, or to be fully out. While some social circles might be safe, others might react negatively, and LGBTQ+ individuals often need to carefully weigh to whom they should come out. I have found that among my friends, a popular strategy to find out someone’s feelings towards the LGBTQ+ community is to figure out what they think of a mutual acquaintance that has come out. But not everyone has a family acquaintance that is openly part of the LGBTQ+ community, and people belonging to less accepting communities are more likely to struggle with thinking of personal acquaintances that are also a member of the LGBTQ+ community. Visibility of LGBTQ+ individuals in the public and political sphere contributes to the normalisation of LGBTQ+ identities and to norms of acceptance, support and respect. Particularly for people who are coming out for the first time, a lack of representation of LGBTQ+ individual can contribute to feelings of loneliness and isolation even in cases where the individual’s environment is not bigoted against LGBTQ+ people. And environments that are, in fact, homophobic or transphobic, often breed internalised homophobia and transphobia on top of discrimination from the surroundings. Knowing other LGBTQ+ people who can relate to and understand the particular difficulties faced by a newly ‘out’ member of the community, can be hugely beneficial for their mental health.
queer at
G-YOU MAGAZINE// SEPTEMBER 2021// 12
there’s a day dedicated to celebrating it (October 11 is the National Coming Out Day in many countries);
it’s a movie and book genre;
‘COMING OUT’-
