Polo Lifestyles - Haiti: Sept-Oct 2020 The Daredevil Meets His Match

VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

ASPEN VALLE Y S U MME R S E AS ON · CA RT I ER Q UEEN ' S C UP F I N A L BA RRIERE D E AU VILLE P OLO C U P 20 20 · A PO LO WEDDI N G I N PR ETO R I A

ARRIVE IN STYLE

DREAM HELICOPTERS

SEVEN RUMS TO

UPGRADE YOUR BAR TODAY'S TOP TRAITS OF WORLD-CLASS LEADERS

THE LONGEVITY DIET CARBS AREN'T THE ENEMY CHALLENGED ACCEPTED: DESIGNING VIRTUAL CHARITY EVENTS NOW

NAVIGATING 2020

INTENTION, FOCUS & CONTROL

POST-COVID TRAVEL

HOW YOUR HEALTH RECORD COULD PLAY A VITAL ROLE

TALL, DARK AND HAND SOM E

GILLES MARINI TH E DARE DE VIL M E E TS H IS MATCH

@ U S PO LOA SSN

USP OL OASSN G L OBA L . C O M

VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

Ambassador Claude-Alix Bertrand Publisher

Joshua Jakobitz Editor-in-Chief

Gregory Bertrand

William Smith

Philanthropy Contributor

Elle Chrysler

Copy Editor

Polo Contributor

Claire Barrett

Brand Representatives Anne-Isabelle Saint-Pierre - Dubai Rudy Volel - New York City

Eva Espresso

Michael J. Snell - The Hamptons Stanley Pierre-Etienne Caribbean Sara Ali - London Jessica Foret Wax - Santa Fe Charles Ward - Montecito K & Co. Media - Los Angeles

Head of Photography

Contributing Photographer

Cezar Kusik

Wine Contributor

Raphael Dapaah Art Contributor

Joey Velez

Wellness Columnist

Jyoti Paintel

Spiritual Contributor

Stanley Pierre-Etienne Style Contributor

Brett Chody

Style Contributor

Anne-Isabelle Saint-Pierre Style Contributor

Michael J. Snell

Lifestyles Contributor

Philippe Lucas

Luxury Contributor

Contributing Photographers

Julian Dahl Michael J. Snell Mark Beaumont Alice Gipps Neil Polo Art Polo Lifestyles is a publication of HT Polo Publishing Co. 995 Detroit Avenue, Suite A Concord, CA 94518 Content Copyright Š Polo Lifestyles 2020 All Rights Reserved.

For information or to advertise Contact editor@htpolo.com Read online at www.pololifestyles.com Cover Photo by Julian Dahl of Gilles Marini in Burbank, Calif.

Photo on this page: Neil Polo Art

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SANTA BARBARA POLO CLUB Farmers & Merchants Bank USPA Silver Cup Silver Air Pacific Coast Open 8 Goal Series Belmond El Encanto USPA Presidents Cup Jackson Hole Horse Emporium USPA Wickenden Cup POLO DE PARIS Championnat de France de Polo GUARDS POLO CLUB Royal Windsor Cup DOMAINE DE CHANTILLY Open de France Feminine Open de France ASPEN VALLEY POLO CLUB The Triple Crown of Polo Aspen The Triple Crown of Polo Colorado GHANTOOT RACING & POLO CLUB Pink Polo Sultan Bin Zayed Polo Cup Emirates Polo Championship International Al Amal Polo Day for Charity HH President of UAE Polo Cup

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VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

SCOREBOARDS & COCKTAILS S O C I A L D I S T A N C I N G P O L O

CARTIER QUEEN'S CUP SU M M E R S E A SO N CO NTI N U E S I N TH E U K

page 42 POLO LIFESTYLES EDITORS & CONTRIBUTORS

Ambassador Claude-Alix Bertrand Publisher Polo Lifestyles @haiti_polo_captain

Elle Chrysler

Polo Contributor U.S. Polo Connection @ellechrysler

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Josh Jakobitz

Editor-in-Chief Polo Lifestyles @joshuajakobitz

Stanley Pierre-Etienne Style Contributor Lanmou Pou Ranyon @stanleypierretienne

Claire Barrett

Head of Photography Claire Barrett Photography @clairebarrettphoto

Eva Espresso

Photographer Eva Espresso Photography @eva.espresso

Raphael K. Dapaah

Vernissage Contributor Dapaah Gallery @dg_luxe

Michael J. Snell

Lifestyles Contributor MJS Groupe @agnello_1

Jyoti Paintel

Spiritual Contributor Polo Lifestyles @jyotipaintel

Gregory Bertrand Copy Editor Polo Lifestyles @bertrand7367

Cezar Kusik

Wine Contributor Polo Lifestyles @cezartastesearth

Joey Velez

William Smith

Wellness Columnist Philanthropy Contributor Velez Mental Performance Polo Lifestyles @velezmentalhealth @willismith_2000

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Upgrade your Bar with these 7 Rums page 118

Roze Traore Heats Up the Kitchen page 98

Love that Surpasses all Understanding pg 114

Inside the Mind of an Art Collector page 122

GILLES MARINI

TH E DA R ED EV I L M EETS HIS M ATC H AT TH E RANC H

A high-spirited pony. A gentle approach.

A bond that can't be broken.

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR The phone rang a few weeks ago. It was the publisher.

“You know Gilles Marini, right? We’re going to shoot him in Los Angeles. Work out the details.” Any photo shoot has exactly 1 million details to work out – from clothes to permits, accessories to locations, crew to photographer, the list could go on. Now, add into the equation that you-won’t-bephysically-present-because-COVID-19 and suddenly the Type-A editor in you is reluctantly handing off duties and responsibilities left and right.

I can summarize by saying this: It was an exercise in trust.

Gilles is a Renaissance Man; however, with no lack of skills to solve any problem presented. The photo shoot was scheduled before I could barely catch my breath (more on that in the feature story) and executed under the critical eye of Jen Leeser, who played an integral role in the shoot’s success.

The publisher called me again as the book was coming together this month. “Do we have any health-angle story?” I paused and reflected. Nearly every story in Polo Lifestyles this month has something to do with health: a virtual fundraising model in The Hamptons, a wedding in Pretoria, spectator-less polo matches across the world, boosting lifespan and youth with nutrition, accepting and understanding the spiritual forces at work in 2020, and how to safely and securely support causes close to your heart.

So, in a word, yes, health is definitely covered this month.

Health was never a topic we addressed in Polo Lifestyles before 2020. Nutrition-yes. Fitness-yes. Wellness-yes. But life has changed. We’ve changed. Nine months into this year, the coulda-shoulda-woulda rhetoric is largely passé, and we’re figuring this new-normal out. I might start a fight for saying it, but I’m almost used to wearing my mask around the city. Of course, I long for the day we can take them off, put them in the trash or a drawer and forget about them. But until then, I’m going to take sommelier and wine contributor Cezar Kusik’s advice and have a glass of wine. For my health.

Best, Josh Jakobitz josh@pololifestyles.com

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__ulfho__ Make cheat day count... in every way possible; the other six days a week are for training!

haitiantimes Fabiana Pierre-Louis is on track to become the first Black woman to sit on New Jersey’s highest court

worldinstaplaces Italy never ceases to amaze with its destinations and rich history page 24

ceramsbysabrina

We just can't get enough of handpainted ceramics from Haitian artist Sabrina Bennett

kristennoelcrawley The founder of @kncbeauty launched BIG SET full face masks #vegan #natural #crueltyfree #biodegradable

kingdejia Masked polo players returned to the polo grounds outside of Lagos, Nigeria, modeling all brands of masks

elevated _drip Chef and Queer Eye regular Antoni joined master of the kitchen @marthastewart on the water

martiste When beloved pieces of art find loving homes, it is quite magical indeed

mouratoglou_tennis_academy

The U.S. Open, one of summer's premiere events, marches on spectator-less @serenawilliams

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Click and comment on our choices... tag @pololifestyles.

We will share noteworthy comments with you next month.

eponi.hobbyhorse Fun toys for young, up-and-coming equestrians hand-created and ready for export

globalpolo Even on our days off, Global Polo TV creates new content for an evergrowing list of subscribers

lamoupourranyon A challenge we can always get behind: Magazine Cover Model Contest by @stanleypierretienne

blademir_alvarez Tulum, Mexico, still welcoming tourists from around the world is the current hot spot to get away

petercharlesjewelry On the way into the @cartier Queen's Cup final between Les Lions/Next Generation and Park Place.

lovelynewzealand New Zealand, arguably the safest place in the world right now, is also home to fantastic polo.

goodlifeoutfit "I remember being told 'Football will never pay your bills'," says @cristiano

sussexstyleshops In Los Angeles, The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have taken a hands-on approach to volunteering

sallychapmanillustrator Her fabrics and creations make us swoon and we can't wait to get our hands on some soon. page 25

The Ultimate Driving Machine.

CHOOSE YOUR X. THE BMW X RANGE.

NOW WITH 0% FINANCING.

VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

BARRIERE DEAUVILLE POLO CUP

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BARRIERE DEAUVILLE POLO CUP

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n France, team sports are back - and open to the public for events with fewer than 5,000 people. Among these events, there is one that you can’t miss, which belongs to the heritage of sports: the Barrière Deauville Polo Cup and its famous Gold Cup which was created by François André – founder of the Barrière Group – in 1950.

The Deauville tournament is one of the most emblematic tournaments of

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the international season. Thus, the Gold Cup is the only tournament in France and one of the few in Europe to boast a “hall of fame” that includes the names of all the greatest players of the last six decades.

From Alberto Gracida to the Pieres cousins, Gonzalo Pieres (the father with his brother Alfonso for the legendary Australian team Ellerstone), the famous Heguy brothers, Adolfo Cambiaso, have all carved their names

on this mythical Gold Cup. Just last year, Édouard Carmignac’s team, Talandracas won their sixth title with two Argentine Open players, Fran Elizalde and Alejandro Muzio.

Talandracas won this prestigious event with great players such as Juan-Martin Nero (currently the best back in the world and ten titles in the Argentine Open), Milo Fernandez (four titles), Nico and Polito Pieres (serial-finalists in Palermo). This year Talandracas will be back with the same players as

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DEAUVILLE P OLO C LUB SA I S ON 20 20

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last year for a seventh title and will try to equal the tournament record achieved in the 80’s by Alexander Ebeid’s The Falcon with players like the late Gonzalo Heguy and Carlos Gracida or Alfredo Harriott.

This Gold Cup 2020 (15th to 30th August) will of course be

the highlight of the season in Deauville. It will be preceded by the Silver Cup (11th to 16th August), the two tournaments constituting the first two lifts of the French Grand Slam, ending with the Chantilly French Open, from 5th to 20th September. To date, only one team has achieved this page 33

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hat-trick: Cibao La Pampa led by Argentina’s Juan Pepa in 2017.

Since 2015, women’s polo has been the main focus at the International Polo Club of Deauville. Once again, the female players will kick off this year with the Ladies Cup, its finals will be played on Saturday 15th August, a few hours after the first parade of teams in the streets of Deauville. A second parade will take place on August 29th, the day of the Bronze Cup final which will start on the 17th.

Beyond the sport, Polo in Deauville will bring you a really special atmosphere and experience. Here, the public and players meet after the prize-giving ceremony in a large, cozy and friendly space, where they can meet at the bar to “redo the game”! Selfies and good mood are de rigueur. Sometimes polo goes out of the Deauville to La Touques racecourse and returns to the Deauville beach at low tide: an opportunity for the holidaymakers to discover this sport so noble in spirit, but finally so accessible. These formidable little warrior horses with a golden character are actually very approachable. In the morning, we can also see them in lots, walked by their petiseros (their Argentinean grooms), for their condition’s work, with the hooves trampling the waves.

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CARTIER Q UEE N' S C UP 20 20

Photos page 38 by Alice Gipps Equine Photography @alice_gipps_equine_photography

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CARTIER QUEEN'S CUP 2020

L E S L I O N S / N E X T G E N E R AT I O N 9 / 8 PA R K P L A C E AT G U A R D ' S P O LO C L U B A N O V E R T I M E G OA L F R O M J E TA C A S TAG N O L A C L I N C H E D T H E W I N F O R L E S L I O N S / N E X T G E N E R AT I O N

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he 23-goal Les Lions/Great Oaks polo team (Dillon Bacon, Jeta Castagnola, Barto Castagnola and Santiago Laborde) spotted Park Place’s (Andrey Borodin, Will Harper, Gonzalito Pieres and Facundo Pieres) goal in the opening chukker of Sunday’s Cartier Queens Cup final at the Guards Polo Club before taking

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control of the first seven minutes to score three consecutive goals for the early 3-1 advantage.

Goals were at a premium in the second period with Park Place scoring the only goal of the chukker. After two, Les Lions/Great Oaks continued to lead, at 3-2.

Defense continued to rule the day with each side limited to a single goal in the third period. Les Lions/Great Oaks managed to maintain their onegoal lead, 4-3, at the end of the first half.

Neither team was able to mount an effective attack in the fourth chukker with defenders on Lions both sides

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Photos by Alice Gipps Equine Photography @alice_gipps_equine_ photography Right: Dillon Bacon takes on Facundo Pieres in the final of the Cartier Queen's Cup 2020.

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CARTIER Q UEE N' S C UP 20 20

playing a strongly physical match. The score remained 4-3 in favor of Les Lions/Great Oaks.

stretched their lead to two goals, 7-5, going into the final chukker in regulation play.

goals and shutout defense from Park Place knotted the game at 8-8, forcing the sudden-death overtime chukker.

Park Place fell further behind in the fifth with Les Lions/Great Oaks scoring three times to only two goals for Park Place. Les Lions/Great Oaks

Les Lions/Great Oaks put the first goal on the scoreboard in the sixth, expanding their lead to three goals, 8-5, but Park Place rallied. Three straight

Reprising his role from last year’s British Open final, 16-year-old Jeta Castagnola scored another overtime winning goal to give the 2020 Cartier

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Queens Cup to Les Lions/Great Oaks, 9-8.

Ironically, it was Barto Castagnola who scored the winning goal for Les Lions/Great Oaks in overtime to down Thai Polo and earn them a berth in this year’s final.

Jeta Castagnola’s tournament winning goal was his fifth of the day. Santiago Laborde added two goals and single goals were scored

by Dillon Bacon (game MVP) and Barto Castagnola. Barto Castagnola’s Challo Angelo was also named Best Playing Pony.

Facundo Pieres scored five times for Park Place. Gonzalito Pieres and Will Harper each scored a goal and the team received one goal by handicap.

Alex Webbe contributed to the content of this story.

Photos by Alice Gipps Equine Photography @alice_gipps_equine_photography page 43

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AS P E N VA L L E Y P O LO C LU B

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S O C I A L D I S TA N C I N G P O LO A N D STRICT TESTING PROTOCOL FOR AS P E N VA L L E Y P O LO T E A M S

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cClure River Ranch (Alejandro Poma, Marc Ganzi, Nic Roldan, and Jared Zenni) met Los Amigos (Paul Foster, Michael Bickford, Polito Pieres and Alejandro Novillo Astrada) on Field One at the Aspen Valley Polo Club on August 17.

The first chukker started out fast and furious, with both teams up and down the field but unable to score. It wasn’t until the 3-minute mark in the second chukker that Alejandro Poma put the first goal on the board after picking up a trademark long drive from Nic Roldan. Michael Bickford scored on a penalty 3 to end the second chukker tied at 1-1. In the third, Bickford scored again to put Los Amigos briefly in the lead at 2-1, but a succession of goals by Zenni, Roldan and Ganzi left McClure River Ranch in the lead by 4-2 at the half.

In the fourth chukker, McClure River Ranch kept Los Amigos off the board, while Jared Zenni knocked one in for the team, putting McClure River ahead 5-2. Ganzi and Poma scored in the fifth, bringing the score up to 7-2, but in the last minute, Paul Foster came from the left and put the ball through, bringing the score to 7-3. Alejandro Poma started the final with a spectacular open back shot at full speed to put his team ahead 8-3. With slightly more than four minutes left in the game, Foster scored with a slick neck shot. Novillo Astrada scored the last goal of the game, but Los Amigos fell to McClure River Ranch with a final score of 8-5.

Nic Roldan was named MVP, and Aspen, owned and played

by Marc Ganzi, was the Best Playing Pony. Aspen was bred by Pablo Spinacci.

While admission is traditionally open and free to the public, the COVID-19 pandemic has forced the club to close to spectators for the foreseeable future. AVPC has taken this step out of an abundance of caution. Players and staff have been tested in 3 rounds at sister club Grand Champions Polo in Florida since March and will continue to be tested throughout the 2020 summer season.

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Nic Roldan has been playing polo at Aspen Valley Polo Club all summer.

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Aspen Valley Polo Club trophies are always accompanied by Gucci gifts for the players.

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D EST I N AT I O N · L I F ESTYL E · P RODUCT · EVENTS

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A POLO WEDDING IN PRETORIA

P O LO P L AY E R JOHANN DU PREEZ + NADENE NAGEL page 56

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Photos by Nadinepage de Waal 57

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Photos by Nadine de Waal · Dress by Carike Nel Designs

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A POLO WE D D IN G IN P RE TO RI A

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t wasn't the wedding they planned with friends and family from around the globe, but professional polo player Johann du Preez, of Haiti Polo Team, married Nadene Nagel in a smaller, more simple ceremony in Pretoria.

The bride wore a custom creation by designer Carike Nel and both the ceremony and reception were held at a favorite locale of the couple: Fermier Restaurant, next door to an auquaponics center where the joyful photos seen here were taken by local photographer Nadine de Waal. page 59

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HIGH SOCIETY

This page, above: Jean Shafiroff; left: pre-packaged dinners in lieu of catering and service Opposite, top: Constantine Maroulis, Carly Bevier, Rufus Wainwright and Samuel Waxman joined the evening from virtual locations; below: Antonella Bertello, Amelia Doggwiler and Dana Romita and the Fishel family: Bradley, Maria and Kenneth page 62

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HIGH SOCIETY

THE HAMPTONS GOES VIRTUAL FOR CHARITY

MICHAEL J. SNELL Luxury Lifestyles Contributor

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ne of the Hamptons’ most popular summer charity events, the 16th Annual Hamptons Happening, went virtual this year with a concert featuring a medley of rock and pop performances by some of today’s favorite enduring and emerging artists. The charity concert benefited the Samuel Waxman Cancer Research Foundation and its cutting-edge research targeting the abnormal gene functions that cause cancer.

Excitingly, this year’s performer lineup included pop stars like Sophie Beem, Caly Bevier and Rufus Wainwright, who returned to the Hamptons Happening from prior-year performances. From her home, Beem performed “Petty,” her new single released the day before. Also performing were Grammy-Award nominated pop star, Sophie B. Hawkins, Constantine Maroulis, the Tony-nominated star of Rock of Ages on Broadway and Steven Reineke, musical director and conductor of the New York Pops. The award-winning a cappella group Pentatonix performed “Dreams.”

In a change from the normal programming, the SWCRF dedicated this year’s Hamptons Happening

to COVID-19 first responders. Rajeev Fernando, M.D., the Director of Infectious Diseases at the Stony Brook Southampton Hospital, spoke on behalf of first responders.

HIGH SOCIETY

“By the time we saw it spread in Long Island, we were very prepared,” he said. “The community has been very grateful to first responders. We want to tell the community that we will always be on the front lines saving lives.”

Although the coronavirus remains a serious threat to public health, cancer remains the world’s leading cause of death worldwide. “We don’t think of cancer as a pandemic, but in fact, it

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HIGH SOCIETY

is. Globally, cancer claims the lives of more than 26,000 people every day,” said Antonella Bertello, co-chair of the Hamptons Happening event committee and proprietor of The Baker House 1650 in East Hampton.

Chris Wragge, anchor of CBS 2 News New York This Morning and co-anchor of CBS 2 New York News at Noon returned to the Hamptons Happening as master of ceremony.

He delighted viewers with his blend of humor and energetic news-anchor personality.

The Hamptons Happening typically draws large crowds for a fête featuring page 64

gourmet food, wine and spirit tastings, but this year, supporters hosted dozens of small, private viewing parties with friends and family to observe social-distance guidelines.

Many supporters opted to receive a delicious four-course catered dinner by renowned Hamptons Chef Peter Ambrose that was delivered individually wrapped for each guest. Also, the Hamptons Happening beverage sponsors Out East Rosé and Simple Vodka generously provided bottles of their small-batch specialties to accompany the boxed dinners. Virtual attendees also shared images of their individual at-home viewing parties that were spread throughout the Hamptons area.

Dr. Waxman made a tribute to coronavirus first responders.

“I can identify with first responders personally because I know what it is like to care for sick people. I have spoken to several front-line healthcare workers who shared with me the sadness of loss, and I say to them, you are giving something of yourself, but you are getting so much more back in return. Tonight, we are thinking about those who have saved lives, supported lives, comforted lives and given of themselves, and we thank you.”

By Michael J. Snell Luxury Contributor Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

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ACH160 Effortless elegance

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POLO LIFEST YLES SN E AK PE AK

AIRBUS ACH160

ALL-NEW CABIN & ADVANCED AVIONICS

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AIRBUS’ ACH160 VIP HELICOPTER IS LIGHTER,

FASTER & QUIETER THAN ANY IN ITS CLASS

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he new ACH160 Exclusive has game-changing interior and advanced avionics, too

Arriving in the U.S. later this fall, the eagerly anticipated ACH160 Exclusive is a step up from Airbus’ previous generation of executive helicopters. The new interior is a game-changer, with its improved sound insulation and expansive, double-paned windows that open up the view even as they cut back on engine noise.

Co-created by Airbus and yacht designer Harrison Eidsgaard, the ACH160 was designed to provide a large blank canvas for whatever an owner wants in the cabin: lounge chairs arranged for a tête-à-tête, three page 72

seats across or any other configuration of seating for up to eight. Having one of the world’s most sought-after yacht designers create an executive helicopter interior made sense since the Eidsgaard team filled the cabin with every inch of functional space for passengers while retaining the minimal, elegant look.

The quality after completion is also worth noting. Airbus’ obsessive attention to detail shows beyond the avionics and technical components. It comes through in the grain-matched veneers and other woodwork with as many as eight coats of varnish. It is displayed in the ergonomics of small but important details, such as the outer steps that lower at the touch of a

button and get close to the ground for easier boarding.

The chopper’s intuitive Helionix flight deck is also a technical assistance for the pilots, with two to four multifunction screens on both sides of the cockpit that display pertinent information in real-time, as the pilots need it. The functions can be divided into multiple modes, so the pilot and copilot can simultaneously monitor different systems. The Helionix 3 is a true breakthrough in helicopter avionics.

The new Safran turboshaft engines deliver a fast cruise speed of 172.6 mph and a range of 512 miles while burning 15 percent less fuel. The ACH160 will have a maximum endurance of four hours and 30 minutes.

Content courtesy Airbus for Polo Lifestyles

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GILLES MARINI TA LL , DA RK & H A N DSO M E

Gilles Marini on pandemic projects, creative processes, family life and what the daredevil saw when he locked eyes with a horse

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Photos by Julian Dahl · Styling by Jen Leeser, Karen Dahl and Carole Marini · Story by Josh Jakobitz

hen we first talked with Gilles Marini about shooting the cover of Polo Lifestyles’ September issue, we didn’t know exactly how it would work. We are in the middle of a global pandemic, and, to be honest, we were nervous.

The last time we commissioned a photo shoot and did not send representation was never, as in never-ever.

So, we spoke to the photographer, the stylist and Gilles at length about our vision for the shoot and cover. Then, we bravely left it in their hands to

accomplish. Once called a Renaissance Man by his castmates on “Brothers & Sisters”, Gilles turned out to be a jack of all trades. He assembled a small team, secured a location and coordinated the date and time for the socially-distanced photo shoot. “If anyone tells you they’re busy these days,” Gilles joked, “That’s B.S. Everyone is just sitting around watching Netflix in this town.”

And this is how we came to schedule a socially-distanced photo shoot for the cover of Polo Lifestyles in three

days’ time. It seems these days, the one thing that everyone has is plenty of time. As editor of Polo Lifestyles, I felt on more than one occasion, that it was my schedule holding the team back. I first spoke to Gilles on a Monday afternoon and scheduled a follow-up call with the photographer, Julian Dahl, for Tuesday afternoon.

Before I could connect with Julian, Gilles was texting me, “Please, as soon as you can, give me a green light so I can complete the shooting schedule.”

It was exactly at this point when I realized I wasn’t keeping up to Gilles’ page 77

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preferred pace. Adjusting course, we moved up the call with Julian and green-lit the shoot on Tuesday afternoon, and Gilles promptly scheduled it for Friday of that week.

The stylist, Jen Leeser, leaped into action in Los Angeles while also calling designers in New York. Here in San Francisco, we jumped on the phone with the U.S. Polo Association to organize polo looks, as seen on the cover.

A series of next-day, before-10:30 a.m. boxes were delivered to Jen’s door in Los Angeles on Friday morning, and I breathed my first sigh of relief.

Intermittent texts from Jen kept me updated about progression and looks and then all communication was lost.

The ranch in Burbank, where Zeke, our cover model-horse, lives has little to no cellular reception. Jen’s texts to me were failing. I thought of countless polo tournaments where my best intentions for an Instagram Live video were undermined by a lack of AT&T coverage or Wi-Fi stability on-site. At 7 p.m., Jen texted that they were back at Gilles’ home. All had gone well, and she started sending me behindthe-scenes videos and photos, and I breathed another sigh of relief.

Fast forward to the following week when I connected with Gilles again on the phone. He was at home with his wife of 22 years, Carole, who popped in and out a few times. They have raised two children, Georges, 21; and Juliana, 14, together, but Gilles gives Carole most, nay, all of the credit. They are a close-knit family, an American Dream success story – Gilles professed to have not spoken much English upon his arrival in the U.S. – and, most importantly, he is really down to Earth. Throughout our initial conversations, Gilles had promised me he was not one of those demanding Hollywood types. Sure, I thought, the proof will be in the pudding. It turns out, he really is not one of those demanding Hollywood types, though he has been typecast and pigeon-holed into roles, albeit on major, page 78

successful dramas and soaps, as well as in films. Look for Gilles in a role where his character isn’t named JeanLuc, Dante, Saintcroix or Henri, and you won’t find him. Most of his roles have involved playing up the sexy Frenchman that he proudly is, but he’d like to see an opportunity to play a part that is not written specifically for a tall, dark and handsome foreigner.

“It (typecasting) is frustrating for a lot of actors in Hollywood,” he said.

“Right now, Hollywood is under a lot of pressure to reevaluate traditional roles and concepts.”

Gilles surrounds himself with non-traditional creatives who feed his inspiration and processes. Julian, the photographer, is at least a decade younger than I expected him to be – but Gilles was right about him. “He (Julian) is incredible and so talented.

He doesn’t say much, he’s a quiet type, walking around with intention and two cameras. But he’s on the verge of becoming a great artist.”

“I’ve been blessed to be associated with the best of the best in the business over the years,” Gilles confided.

“I’m proud of what I’ve done, but I wouldn’t be alive if I weren’t creative.

My feet, my body, move with creative energy.” He is working consecutively on five TV shows, one of which he promises will revolutionize television.

“It’s a psychological, subliminal-message show presented as a comedy. It’s something funny to watch that will change who you are and how you think.” The writing, he says, often gives him goosebumps. “It would be a waste of my life if I weren’t creative.”

One of the other shows he is working on centers around policing, and in the current climate in the U.S., it’s picking up traction with studios. “The show includes a lot of roles: international, colorful roles. The writing is respectful and understanding.” But don’t look for traditional roles and characters.

“There was no expectation to include certain roles, while really being very inclusive to everyone,” Gilles said

slightly cryptically. “It’s fresh, fun, respectful and intelligent TV.” Though Gilles’ 15-year career in television has been heavily dependent upon major networks and film studios, he looks to newer media like Netflix and Hulu for fresh content and inspiration. “Netflix can green light 200 shows at a time. There’s always new content. I can watch an Israeli TV series with subtitles and identify with the characters, as easily as a show on NBC in English.” His goal in television now, he says, is to bring good, proactive people to the world.

For Gilles, that started at home 21 years ago with the birth of his son, Georges, seven years later, his daughter Juliana joined the family. “My kids are amazing,” Gilles said matter-of-factly. “They’re both very protective of me – you know I’m a bit of a daredevil, always doing stupid shit.”

Their home has the reputation of a reality show with a steady (pre-COVID) stream of family and friends coming and going at all hours of the day. One of the near-constant presences in the Marini family is French heavyweight mixed martial artist and former kickboxer Cheick Kongo. “Sometimes, I wake up in the morning, and Cheick is in my bedroom!” Gilles laughed.

“Our home is a safe haven for us and anyone here.”

That’s true more than ever since March 13, 2020, when most of the world went into lockdown. “Georges turned 21 on March 12 – the day before lockdown – and I took him out for a beer to celebrate,” said Gilles.

Georges confided in his father he is interested in a career in justice, specifically the FBI. Gilles cannot think of a better person than his son to protect, serve and defend the country. “We need, more than ever, good people in law enforcement— People who see color and respect it and treat everyone equally. We have an issue in the United States – 21-year-old kids can see it – and it won’t, can’t last. We can’t lose the American Dream for anyone.”

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Fourteen-year-old Juliana, on the other hand, is present to update any of Gilles’ outdated, 1990’s references. “Dad, you can’t say that anymore’ is one of her favorite catchphrases,” Gilles laughed. “But she’s right, 100 percent of the time about it.”

The kids are protective of Gilles for a reason: he’s undergone 19 surgeries, and during the taping of one season of “Dancing with The Stars”, he was constantly getting shots for pain. The day after his elimination from the show, he was under the knife once again. “Doctors – and I won’t name names because I need to continue to work in this town – prescribed me pain medicine after pain medicine.”

Compounded with sleeping pills, Gilles became increasingly uncomfortable with the drug regimen.

“I did research and found out that people die from opioid overdoses. From there, I quit taking the drugs; I quit taking the sleeping pills. I changed my relationship with food and drink. I started listening to my body,” he said. “It’s easy to be super healthy and not understand nutrition, but it’s impossible to understand nutrition and not be super healthy. I’ve never felt better in my life.” page 80

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The way he approaches money has evolved d similarly to his relationship with food, drink and nutrition.

“Money is only good if it makes you happy; otherwise, it is just a poison.

There has to be substance in what makes you happy. Does a new Chanel bag make you happy? Okay – get it.

But for me, sometimes, I’m working outside in nature, listening to the wind in the trees or water in a rippling river, and I’ll just howl with happiness.

Carole always comes running, but I tell her I’m just expressing my joy.” page 82

In a town where nothing seems to last, Gilles’ and Carole’s marriage of 22 years stands the test of time. What is the secret to their bliss? Gilles gives Carole all the credit. “She balances me.

She’s done everything for this family.

I’ve never been so in love with her as I am during this pandemic. I can’t imagine life without her.” There’s one more thing that helps: “Sex. Lots of sex. Every night sex,” Gilles laughed.

For this month’s cover photo shoot, we put Gilles in his happy place: where he

could smell, touch and connect with another spiritual animal: Zeke. “The horse is so powerful, he could take me down in an instant, but instead, I talked to him and thanked him for the opportunity to meet and work together. Later, I rode him without [a] problem. His trainer told me later Zeke has a reputation as a feisty, former racehorse, who’s bucked riders off and broken their bones,” Gilles said. “He never even flinched with me.”

By Josh Jakobitz Editor-in-Chief Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

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It turns out, he really is not one of those demanding Hollywood types, though he has been typecast and pigeon-holed into roles, albeit on major, successful dramas and soaps, as well as film. Look for Gilles in a role where his character isn’t named Jean-Luc, Dante, Saintcroix or Henri, and you won’t find him. Most of his roles have involved playing up the sexy French man that he proudly is, but he’d like to see an opportunity to play a part that is not written specifically for a tall, dark and handsome foreigner. “It (typecasting) is frustrating for a lot of actors in Hollywood,” he said. “Right now, Hollywood is under a lot of pressure to reevaluate traditional roles and concepts,” he said.

Photographer Julian Dahl @thejuliandahl Make up Karen Dahl @dahlface99 Hair Carole Marini @carolemarini Horse Model Zeke @zekeandsilkyair Special Thanks to Lady Elise Layzell Horse Owner Styling & Producing Jenny Leeser @jenny_leeser Suit by CKCNY @christopherkorey Knits by Mr. Turk @mrturk Polos, Sweaters, Button Downs, Jeans and Outerwear by Us Polo Association by U.S. Polo Assn. @uspoloassn Watch by Ritmo Mundo @ritmomundo

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STAY-AT-HOME DREAMS ARE ONLY WHAT YOU WAKE UP FROM

THE RAZOR-SHARP DUALITY OF IDEALIZATION GREGORY BERTRAND Copy Editor @bertrand7367

deserve, they only get what they can leverage out of life’s situations.

ife is hard, and most of the time, it never turns out exactly how you expected.

When you are young, say in or right out of college, you have the expectation that the world owes you something for all the hard work that you put in.

Andrew Martin’s “Cool For America: Stories” is chock-full of young Millennials who are wrestling with the realization that their actual lives do not and will likely never match up to their idealized lives. Most of these 11 stories center around characters who know they can do better but are either stuck in a sub-par position or are just willing to settle because, well, sometimes, it’s easier not to fight, and sometimes, you have to have the fight beat out of you.

You grow up thinking that if you apply yourself, do well in school, and work hard enough, you will get a slice of that delicious pie that is commonly known as the American Dream. But, as a character in a Raymond Carver story puts it, “Dreams are what you wake up from.” Eventually, sooner or later, the reality of life settles in, and you realize, nobody gets what they

Take, for example, Leslie, the young woman in the opening story “No Cops.” She’s stuck dating a “flagrantly mediocre” writer who can only publish his books because his friend owns a printing press. Leslie is a copy editor for an alternative newspaper, a job that, by her own admission, bores her to death. In truth, what she really wants to do is write, if only some-

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one, or something would give her the chance. Despite being well educated, Leslie cannot shake the sneaking suspicion that everyone in life, from the writers she edits for, to her flagrantly mediocre boyfriend, is doing far better than her. So, how does Leslie cope with this reality? Well, she does what many of the characters in “Cool For America” do, she indulges in alcohol and drugs to numb the pain.

The more I read Martin’s writing, the more I was reminded of another writer who specialized in desperately unhappy people, Denis Johnson. Both writers have a voice that I like to call “naturally cool”—that is, the words flow off the page at a breezy pace, yet, every one of them packs a natural punch of emotion. Both Martin and Johnson have a knack for handling the heartbreaking reality of heavy drug use. Another writer that Martin page 89

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What exactly makes characters like Leslie, Steven and Patricia, “Cool For America”?

In the eponymous story, a character remarks of a couple, “He thinks he’s such a stud because he’s a climber and a biker and whatever, but he doesn’t realize he’s just, like, cool for Missoula. She’s cool for America.” reminds me of is Raymond Carver (which is why I quoted him earlier), the literary icon behind the “DirtyRealism” sub-genre, where the tragedy of everyday life is put on display.

Granted, Martin’s characters are not as poor as Carver’s, but their unhappiness remains a shared quality.

In “With the Christopher Kids,” the most tragic story in the collection, two siblings, Steven, an alcoholic with a slight cocaine problem, and Patricia, a recovering alcoholic fresh out of rehab, spend a rather depressing holiday together. The story takes place on Christmas Eve, while the pair are visiting their mother, and in keeping with the holiday spirit, the two decide to do a little coke and head out to a bar. Except Patricia has a bad reaction to the coke and ends up in the hospital after almost dying in a freezing car while her brother is inside

of a bar ordering shots. And, in what is the most heartbreaking moment in the most heartbreaking story, when their mother arrives at the hospital, all she can do is ask, “Do you ever think about how I’m going to feel when you finally kill yourselves?”

It did not take me long to start to think about the meaning behind the name of Andrew Martin’s short story collection.

What exactly makes characters like Leslie, Steven and Patricia, “Cool For America”? In the eponymous story, a character remarks of a couple, “He thinks he’s such a stud because he’s a climber and a biker and whatever, but he doesn’t realize he’s just, like, cool for Missoula. She’s cool for America.”

My takeaway from this statement is that many of these characters’ air of coolness is only a façade, a duality of

sorts, a way to hide the actual hollowness of their existence. In “Childhood, Boyhood, Youth,” the plot centers around a book club made up of what can best be described as rich, over-educated, liberal hipsters, who are only taking place in this book club (they are reading “War and Peace”) to seem smarter. These characters do not come off as cool. To use a modern parlance, they come off as try-hards.

In a way, I guess duality would be the perfect word to sum up the theme of “Cool For America.” The duality between your idealized self and your actual self, and the duality between seeming “cool” while very much being a person who should not be viewed as being cool.

By Gregory Bertrand Copy Editor Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

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FASHION & STYLE A MODEL CHEF: ROZE TRAORE OVERSIZED PROPORTIONS RULE 2021 RESORT WEAR

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Photos

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RECIPES FOR SARTORIAL SUCCESS

CELEBRITY CHEF ROZE TRAORE SERVES FASHION AND FOOD

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CHEF ROZE TRAORE:

THE INTERSECTION OF FUNKY BLENDS OF CUISINE, TOP TRAVEL DESTINATIONS AND FASHION "EVERYONE IS RUSHING TO SUPPORT AFRICAN AMERICAN CHEFS, WHICH IS AMAZING, BUT WE SHOULD BE SHOWING OFF CHEFS WHO AREN’T NECESSARILY THAT AFRICAN-AMERICAN STEREOTYPE."

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ou can cook good-looking food— and look good cooking it. Just ask Rōze Traore, the rising chef who refuses to be only one thing Maybe you know Rōze Traore by his picture. Maybe you know him by his food. The Le Cordon Bleu alum has had his fair share of successes in both the culinary and modeling worlds, with stints at the NoMad Hotel and Eleven Madison Park in New York City, an invite to cook at the James Beard House, and modeling gigs for Nike and other notable designers and companies.

He’s also dabbled in the private chef life and, thanks to his unique combination of food and fashion, has an ever-growing Instagram audience.

Traore’s not even 30, and he’s only just started shaking up the food industry and changing the definition of who and what a chef can be—even if the coronavirus pandemic has shifted some of his plans. We caught up with this stylish chef to ask him about his funky blend of cuisines, top travel destinations, and how food and fashion intersect in his life.

Cassie Hurwitz: How did you get started cooking?

Rōze Traore: Cooking, for me, has always been in the family. My dad was page 96

all about getting us acquainted with our culture and where we came from, which is the Ivory Coast. He cooked a lot of traditional dishes. When I graduated from high school, I needed to figure out what I wanted to do as a career, and the closest thing I could relate to was food. So I thought, “What is the best school where I could get the fundamentals behind cooking?” and I landed on Le Cordon Bleu.

Where did modeling and fashion come in?

After I graduated from Le Cordon Bleu, I decided I wanted to move to D.C. and work at one of the best restaurants there at that moment, which was at the Mandarin Oriental hotel. That was my first introduction to fine dining. After working under that chef for some time, I decided I wanted to move on and check out a few other spots.

I heard that New York would be another awesome place to learn more about the food scene, but I also heard that it was a great fashion zone, and I’ve always had some interest in fashion. I started getting booked for some modeling jobs, and I realized that the food at the shoots was something that could’ve been better. I would engage with the casting directors and tell them, “Hey, I can also cook, and it’s what I actually enjoy doing a lot

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more.” That was my introduction to the private world. Then I decided I wanted to step foot in the Michelin world. So I worked at the NoMad for a year, then Eleven Madison Park for a year, then continued back on my journey as a private chef.

rounded with—because I have more time—that’s been the most beautiful thing about this whole experience.

ways we can amplify people of color in the food industry, now and continuously in the future?

I crept on your Instagram. It looks like you’ve been making a lot of delicious meals during quarantine!

What do you enjoy about being a private chef?

I didn’t have time for it before because it does take time, and now I’m able to sit down and really think about these ingredients and dishes. I’m thinking of different ways and creative techniques to make fine dining in an approachable way. That’s one thing that’s really important to me.

Everyone is rushing to support African American chefs, which is amazing, but the other thing I want to highlight is that we should also be showing off chefs that aren’t necessarily that African-American stereotype, which is southern food or African food. I grew up on some African food, but I didn’t grow up on southern food.

I think showing more faces from the African American community within the fine dining world is something that can really be impactful. Also being active within the community is something that shows a lot of support.

But generally showing more faces within the fine dining world that are African American is something that needs a push because it’s hard to find them. There are chefs like me that are adding in their own twists—I learned fine dining and French cuisine, but I managed to introduce different cultures to each other while still keeping it at that high caliber. There’s not many that are doing that, but they’re out there.

When you hear “private chef,” you automatically think someone is cooking at your house. That was always boring to me. I wanted to separate myself from that stereotype. I just prefer, and build myself around, creating bespoke events around the world. That is how I continue to grow, and those are the clients that I continue to acquaint myself with because they have high expectations and they appreciate the food more. It’s a whole different world.

You were planning to open a pop-up restaurant in NYC before the pandemic hit, right?

Yep, right before this. It was at Chefs Club. It’s crazy how we were planning all this, we heard that there was a virus happening, but we were still planning ahead on what we were going to do for the next three months, not knowing this was going to happen.

So it’s on pause. It was going to be a three-month residency.

Are you still hoping to do the residency in the future?

It is something I’m going to do in the future. This whole experience has actually been positive, though, because it’s given me more time to engage with my audience, to figure out what needs to happen and not necessarily what I want to happen. It’s given me time to come up with more recipes and really just figure out what I want to happen next.

I’m definitely going to have a residency in the near future, but I think the fact that I was able to acquaint myself more with my audience and understand the food that I’m constantly surpage 98

How has your cooking style changed while stuck inside?

I wanted all the ingredients I used to be accessible to the day-to-day home cook, but I’ve also been focusing more on techniques and understanding the process. For example, I’ve been working on my brining solutions.

When it comes to a whole chicken, you brine the whole thing so the salt and aromatics can really enhance the flavors within the chicken. But then you also air dry it because that is what helps it get really crispy. I’m usually running around day in and day out, but actually getting the time to sit and think about the techniques—I think that’s really helped me.

What are some of the non-food things that have kept you going during this time?

I’ve actually been writing a lot on future book ideas. I’ve been exercising a lot more, using the Peloton, which is something that I had prior to this, and it would just stare at me the whole day and I would just not get on. So I finally got into that. And just continuing to find ways to express myself in a creative way has been really important, not only for myself but also for those watching because it does impact them.

You’ve been sharing your support for the Black Lives Matter movement on Instagram recently. What are some

Speaking of blending cuisines, how has your background and the various places you’ve lived and traveled inspired this palate?

My adventures, the traveling (when I was able to travel, of course)—to be able to go to Venice and experience what a really good octopus tastes like, that is something not a lot of people get to try. To really get a sense of what fresh Italian olive oil or tomatoes taste like, that’s something that I always keep in mind when I’m creating a dish. It’s how I can introduce and merge all these countries, places, cultures together on one plate and have it taste delicious.

When we are able to travel again, what destination is at the top of your list?

I’m aiming at Japan. I think Japanese culture is amazing and the food is delicious. There’s a lot of finesse to it.

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But I want to continue traveling. I’m the type who will go anywhere just to get a different perspective on not only life but culture and cuisine as well. That enhances my palate and my knowledge, which I can pass on to the world.

How do food and fashion influence each other in your life?

There really isn’t anyone in the middle of these worlds—I’m the bridge. I have the blessings to continue to rise within the culinary world and also be acquainted with the fashion who’s-whos. For example, at fashion industry events, I find myself being the only chef there. I take pride in educating and showing these people what the culinary world is about and

continuing to entertain them through food. I also take a little touch back to the culinary side and show them it’s okay to express yourself, it’s okay to be vibrant. There are different outlets to becoming a chef other than working in the kitchen. I’ve been able to bridge these two worlds by bringing different people onto my team, and we are able to go on these cooking adventures.

That’s my biggest mission.

Let’s end with a couple rapid-fire questions. What’s your desert island meal?

Have you ever had just some really, really good tacos? You know, they’re so good, with small tortillas—something juicy like that. I don’t eat too much beef, but I’d have an amazing chicken or steak taco.

Go-to late-night snack?

I’m big on ice cream. I could do half a pint in a session, which is like 2030 minutes max. The worst thing is sometimes it’s coffee ice cream, so that just keeps you hyper while you’re eating it. Vanilla, coffee, and caramel are my top three.

Favorite childhood meal?

Braised whole fish with plantains.

That sounds amazing.

Exactly.

By Cassie Hurwitz/Special to Polo Lifestyles

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OVERSIZE PROPORTIONS FOR RESORT COLLECTIONS AND SPRING 2021 THESE DESIGNERS NAILED IT

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versized proportions are trending on and off the runway as today’s designers embrace spaciousness – and lots of extra fabric – to expand beyond the human form.

In the history of modern fashion, oversized clothing came to prominence in the post-World War I aesthetic of the 1920s. As women had more social and economic opportunities due to increased industrialism, the clothing made for them became more comfortable and freeing.

The public embraced the shift with trendy pieces like the flapper dress and Coco Chanel’s game-changing twopiece dress. Since then, oversized proportions have been a mainstay in fashion scenes, alternatively epitomizing pop culture and counterculture. The hippie aesthetic of the 60s and ’70s and the shift from fringe 90s hip-hop culture to the contemporary streetwear explosion form two interesting examples.

As always, today’s designers are in a unique position to explore and reinvent this legacy. Through Resort and Spring 2021 collections, we have continued to see oversized proportions. Voluminous tops and coats, wide-leg pants, oversized suits and accessories, Violet Beauregarde blueberry jackets, cocooning capes and sleeves – the only limits are your imagination and your sewing machine.

Jil Sander, Rick Owens & Balenciaga give it edge, Y/ Project unbuttons it. Dsquared2 and Maison Mihara Yasuhiro deconstruct it. Ziggy Chen and KidSuper combine it with masks to create larger-than-life, superhuman forms. JW Anderson eschews the model altogether, leaving us to question whether clothes can be oversized if they have nobody to be compared to?

Courtesy The Impression

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SEAN SUEN

ZEGNA

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DIOR

OFF WHITE

LOUIS VUITTON

FERRAGAMO

JIL SANDER

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BOTTEGA VENETA

CELINE

CHRISTIAN WIJNANTS

BASS COUTURE

BOTTER

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A LOVE STORY THAT WASN'T MEANT TO BE THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF LOVE FROM PETIT-GOAVE TO PENNSYLVANIA

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WHEN LOVE SURPASSES ALL UNDERSTANDING FATE BROUGHT THEM TOGETHER

UNSPEAKABLE LOVE KINDLED THEIR HEARTS

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he story of Naomie Brinvilus and Xander Miller is one that shouldn’t have worked out.

The odds – language, culture, distance, family to name a few – were stacked against them. They had barely three months together from their first exchange until Xander’s 90-day visa expired and he left Haiti to return to the States. That was in 2010. Today, they’re married, living in Pennsylvania, working on a book together and raising their son, Emerson.

It all started in the coastal town of Petit-Goâve on the island of Haiti.

Petit-Goâve is the next considerable city after Léogâne, west of the capital of Port-au-Prince. I love the drive into Petit-Goâve, over rolling hills and peaks where you can start to see the outline of a city on the water below.

As the elevation drops, the temperature rises and by the time you’re in downtown Petit-Goâve, it’s just plain hot. If someone asks you to estimate the time it takes to travel between Port-au-Prince and Petit-Goâve, you start by saying, “Well, if there’s no traffic…”. The congestion, you see, between the center of the capital city and page 112

the outlying farmlands-turned-makeshift-communities along the national highway, is not inconsiderable. It has taken me 90 minutes to go from my house in Pétion-Ville to Petit-Goâve and it has taken me six hours to do the same route on a different day, at a different time, in what my driver used to call, “A big traffic.”

Back in 2010, the traffic was worse than usual, due to damage from the earthquake that had devasted the island’s infrastructure, government systems and housing; clean-up efforts that stalled traffic for miles as crews removed blocks and boulders mostly by hand, and an influx of foreigners in rented SUVs trying desperately to get across town to a Cluster meeting or distribution site.

Xander Miller was one of those foreigners, although his work assignment took him to PetitGoâve full-time, where he didn’t have to deal as much with the congestion of the city.

Like most, if not all, humanitarians, Xander didn’t deploy to Haiti in 2010 looking for love; he deployed as a

medical responder. He treated patients in Petit-Goâve at a clinic. He was, what Naomie told me during our interview, a “bon jan blan,” meaning, he was a foreigner doing foreigner-things, speaking clumsy Creole and basically doing the right-thing at the right-time. Then cholera broke out, first in an area called L’Artibonite, east of the capital. Cholera’s unstoppable rampage overtook the entire island

Xander Miller and Naomie Brinvilus

JOSH JAKOBITZ Editor-in-Chief @joshuajakobitz

within a matter of weeks. The fractured Ministry of Health and Human Services scrambled to respond and deploy sufficient resources. The UN Health Cluster mandated certain clinics and organizations to set up cholera treatment centers (CTCs) in strategic locations. While I supervised the con-

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Dating in Haiti in 2010 and 2011

friend” didn’t even consider it cheating. In extremely crass terms, it was explained to me that a “mission girlfriend” was a close cousin of the It’s-Not-Cheating-IfIt’s-A-Different-ZIP-Code concept. Even legit mission relationships are intensified by crises. When people experience trauma together, there is an unbreakable bond that grows between them. It grows quickly and, although it can fade, it is always there. This is how humanitarians come to have life-long friends all over the world. We may not hear from each other for years, but we can pick up right where we left off, be it Haiti or Liberia, the Sudan or Iraq. Crisis brings humanitarians together for a short, intense experience.

struction of a CTC in the Bel-Air neighborhood of Port-au-Prince, it was cholera that brought Naomie and Xander into proximity with one another in PetitGoâve. Naomie found work as a hygiene promoter with Oxfam International, making more money in one month than her mother did in a year.

“I saw him from a distance and thought, ‘Wow,’” Naomie said. There was eye contact and blushing that day in Petit-Goâve, but no interaction. A CTC isn’t exactly designed for flirting. He didn’t really speak Creole or French; she didn’t speak English. The second time they saw each other was at a Digital Stars concert while she was getting a drink at the bar. “Ou bel

anpil, madam,” Xander said, boldly. “You’re a knock-out beauty.”

Naomie addressed him formally in French, but he asked if they could speak Creole instead. In turn, she asked him to dance, but he declined. Instead, they exchanged phone numbers and he sent her a good-morning text the next day. “I wanted to know immediately all of the basics: was he married?

Single? Kids? Serious?”

Naomie said. Her concern wasn’t misplaced. It’s quite common to have a “mission girlfriend” for many workers in the humanitarian world. Far away from home and prying eyes, with limited communication options, most of the guys I knew who practiced “mission girl-

That, however, was not Xander’s intention. He was single – and serious. I asked Naomie how they communicated, and she laughed.

Nowadays she speaks perfect English, but back then, she said, “We had so little language in common.” They communicated non-verbally and using a Creoleto-English dictionary to decipher the notes they left

each other. He met her family after texting back and forth constantly for a few days. She had feared he’d be uncomfortable in their simple home environment, which included sleeping arrangements in a tent. The multi-generational family home was situated in a lakou, or shared garden space with other houses, near downtown. Naomie liked to sit on the front porch of the house closest to the road and wait for his text: Mwen preske rive bo kote’w (I’m in the neighborhood).

“My mom was unexpectedly cool with Xander coming to meet us. I wanted him to meet my sisters as well, who had been particularly critical of past local boyfriends.” Xander bonded with her mom and younger sisters. Naomie’s home became a refuge and calm place for both of them – a respite from long, trying days at clinics treating cholera patients. Xander was learning how to dance Compas, and to the delight of her family, they’d turn on the TV to a music channel and dance to Ti-Vice. His dancing looked like “hiking on flat land at first,” but he

With Naomie's grandmother (far right) Madame Ti Klis

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improved, Naomie said. The evenings spent together brought joy into the household.

Xander constantly found ways to make Naomie feel special. He sent greetings vis-à-vis an unexpected, mutual acquaintance during the middle of the day. Naomie was feeling more and more comfortable with him.

Is this love, she wondered? Cultural differences were about to test their relationship. Unmarried Haitian women living at their parents’ home traditionally have little opportunity to be alone with a suitor or boyfriend.

Most time together is more or less supervised and familial, up until the wedding. When Xander proposed a weekend away in Port-Salut, a picturesque destination across the mountain range, nestled on the southern coastline, Naomie faced a dilemma: to ask permission or forgiveness? She chose a hybrid and, in her words, Sort of glossed over the exact details of the duration of the getaway, implying it would be an overnight trip. Her father wasn’t happy when she returned three days later, and the excursion to Port-Salut pumped the brakes on his blessing of the courtship.

On Christmas Eve, instead of going to church, Xander invited Naomie to an NGO (non-governmental organization) party at a villa on the beach. Naomie described the villa as a mansion, like she’d seen as the set of a TV show. There were unlimited drinks and raucous behavior. “It was a mega-fete,” she said. The couple found themselves alone on a swing, kissing while the ocean breeze cooled their skin. Later, they fell asleep in an empty bedroom and walked home at 7 a.m. Naomie summed up the experience, “I’d never been to a party like that.” She felt like Cinderella, and aptly, the clock was about to strike midnight.

Their time together in Petit-Goâve was up. And despite Xander’s promises and all of the emotions and excitement from their time together, when his visa expired and he returned to the page 114

United States, Naomie didn’t expect to hear from him again. Influenced by friends and family members who told her, He’s never coming back for you, she felt a sadness overtake her whole body. To her surprise, he sent her a message as soon as he touched down in Miami. It was then she knew what they shared far exceeded their differences.

They continued their long-distance relationship on the phone for over a year. Before long, Xander asked her it if would make her happy to come live with him in the United States? Naomie trembled at the thought, but said yes.

He started making arrangements for Naomie to come to the States on a fiancée visa. Her first appointment at the embassy in Tabarre 48 was a disaster. In the waiting room, she noticed the other applicants were all couples, and sure enough, the consular officer inquired why Naomie came alone?

Nowhere on the consular Web site had coming as a couple been suggested. Naomie struggled to navigate the impractical consular system online, so Xander reapplied, bought her a ring – and plane ticket – before the second visa interview.

He flew to Port-au-Prince and found her in Petit-Goâve. They went to the beach, cuddled and played in the water.

Naomie went to buy lambi and banane pesée (conch and plantain chips) for them and when she came back, Xander was down on one knee. She said, Yes, as fishermen and other beach-goers clapped.

They went to her second visa appointment together this time. She showed the consular officer her ring and answered invasive questions: How soon in their relationship did they have sex?

What was she wearing when they first met? The consular officer was satisfied with her answers and the American Embassy in Port-au-Prince issued Naomie a fiancée visa on the spot. She now had 90 days to plan a wedding in accordance with the visa restrictions. In 2012, Naomie got onto a jet and flew to the United States with her fiancé. She still barely spoke English, but Xander had a plan for that. He’d labeled everything in the apartment with a sticky note and borrowed all of the seasons of Sex and the City on DVD from his mom and he played them for Naomie one after the other.

Left and center: Dating in Haiti in 2010 and 2011; Right: with son Emerson

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They married in a small civil ceremony in Ohio on May 21, without her family. Xander had applied for visas for her family members, but they were denied, and with time running out for Naomie’s fiancée visa, they forged ahead. A friend of Naomie’s took a 20-hour train ride from Boston to Cleveland so that she would have someone from her side at the wedding.

In August, his parents hosted a reception for them. His mother even found a caterer with a Caribbean background to make familiar food.

He also embarked upon the very American concept of sharing his entire life with her. “His books, his work, his life… he wanted us to have all of this in common,” Naomie said. “It was very different than a Haitian relationship (between a husband and wife).”

They still struggled to communicate fully in English as Naomie studied and studied. It took her only a year to have the confidence to speak English, but that year dragged on for her at times.

Even during their wedding, she hadn’t been entirely sure of what the officiant was saying at certain times.

Fast-forward eight years: Xander has recently published his book, “Zo,” a coming-of-age story of a young man in Haiti, and they are working on another book together. I read a preview of “Zo” between conversations with Naomie (waiting for my Amazon order to ship) and I was stunned at the level of description and haunting accuracy that his writing conjures. As someone who spent very formative years of my life in Haiti, traveling from one end of the island to the other, “Zo” portrays the edgy realness of desperation and resilience that I knew existed, but that I perhaps glossed over in my fanaticism for portraying Haiti as a picturesque destination.

I had surrounded myself with professional development specialists, scions of industry, leaders of various international aid agencies and, of course, what we somewhat pejoratively called “locals.” Real people. Or so I thought.

Turns out that if I knew a few real people in Haiti, Xander spent considerable time with real-real people, and “Zo” reflects that.

How much did Naomie contribute to writing “Zo”? I gave it the ultimate

authenticity read, she told me, but it’s Xander’s writing, his story. But Naomie writes, too. In August, her writing made its way into the Modern Love section of The New York Times, which is where I first read her story. “A Glance (and a Rooster) That Changed Everything” was the highlight of my day and I reached out to Naomie afterward, needing to understand more about this glance and their non-verbal love story.

What I learned from my conversations with her is that their love was destiny, an unshakable fate that, although perhaps intensified by crisis, bridged a great divide and blossomed because their intentions, non-verbally or in broken language, were clear.

Extraordinary love transcends the barriers we’re taught, like Naomie’s disparaging friends and family, exist between race, class and history. It fills up the voids of cultural differences and it creates a safe space for two people to express themselves fully and unconditionally, and in the case of Naomie and Xander, even non-verbally.

By Josh Jakobitz Editor-in-Chief Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

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The creation of this exceptional clock draws its inspiration from the concept "tempus fugit" (times flies), providing an endless source of fascination.

Whether long or short, friend or foe, time runs wild and free. The idea of "taming" it - not to gain mastery over it but rather to better appreciate it - this was the starting point of the amazing adventure which gave birth to the mare and her foal, an automaton and exceptional clock baptized “Hippologia.�

The Parmigiani Haute Horlogerie Manufacture has mastered the fine art of creating beautiful timepieces shrouded in mystery. Through its restoration work, Parmigiani is intimately acquainted with historical masterpieces, enabling it to hone its own creativity. This manifests itself in the form of unique timepieces, each a real piece of watchmaking bravura. In the past, the manufacture has already created many table clocks decorated with sculptures reproducing a dynamic movement. This year, Parmigiani Fleurier wanted to dream bigger and go further.

VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

UPGRADE YOUR BAR

WITH THESE SEVEN RUMS

D

uring the summer—or any warm weather—my favorite time of day is rum o’clock. You cannot find it on a watch dial, of course, but by the late afternoon, you know that the hour is fast approaching.

In my mind, drinking rum (neat, on the rocks, or in simple cocktails) is always better when you are in the Caribbean or wherever the spirit you’re enjoying was made. But as I learned this year, the right rum can quickly make you forget that there is not a new stamp in your passport.

Here are seven stellar standouts to consider this summer.

TEN TO ONE CARIBBEAN WHITE RUM $37 Founded by Trinidad-born and MIT-educated Marc Farrell, who was Starbucks’ youngest-ever vice presi-

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dent, Ten to One’s Caribbean white rum is among one of my all-time-favorites for cocktails. (And therefore, perfect for all my summer libations.)

Perhaps it’s the fact that it is 100% rum—with zero additives. No added sugar. No added “flavor.” No added coloring.

Beyond that, the liquid is just versatile: It will work well in any rumbased drink. It is clean and fresh on the palate—with notes of citrus zest, honeysuckle, and lemon grass. It’s excellent on daiquiris and jazzedup mojitos. The brand also offers a dark version, which is also quite the winner—but not for cocktails. This one is to savor neat—or on the rocks, whichever your preference. One thing that I love is the fact that Ten to One expressions are pan-Caribbean blends. (For instance, the white hails

from the Dominican Republic and Jamaica. While the dark comes from Trinidad, Barbados, Jamaica, and the Dominican Republic.)

SANTA TERESA 1796 RUM $45 Santa Teresa has been one of my goto’s for several years now. It’s a rum you can drink all day long by a pool (or by the ocean). A superb summer libation. It is slightly sweet and reminiscent of all things summer—but not cloyingly so. But then again, did we expect anything less? Venezuela has stringent rules when it comes to rum production. The blend consists of multiple streams with ages ranging from four to 36 years, all aged in ex-bourbon barrels—before being further aged using the solera method.

It is balanced and complex on the palate at the same time: There are a

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lot of honey and caramel notes—complemented by a bittersweet chocolate finish.

RHUM BARBANCOURT RÉSERVE SPÉCIALE 8-YEAR $23 Rhum Barbarncourt’s 8-Year Réserve Spéciale (seen above) is something I’d like to think of as an everyday rum.

Not too fancy—but not mediocre in the least. The 86-proof Haitian rum does the job whether you are in the mood for something to drink as-is or in a daiquiri, Barbancourt is a solid choice. And with its price point, it’d also make for an excellent housewarming gift.

EQUIANO RUM $60 Billed as the “world’s first African and Caribbean rum,” Equiano is a blend made with liquid sourced from two distilleries in opposite sides of the world: Foursquare Rum Distillery in Barbados and Grays in Mauritius— just off the east coast of Madagascar.

Named after Olaudah Equiano—the Nigerian-born freedom fighter and abolitionist, the rum’s co-creator Ian Burrell (a legend in the industry) made sure that the blend would live up to its namesake. The rum starts in Mauritius, where it is aged for at least ten years in ex-Cognac and French Limousin oak, before being sent to Barbados where it is married with rum aged in ex-bourbon casks.

And the result is extraordinary in that it’s balanced and versatile enough for every kind of rum enthusiast—with rich (but not overpowering caramel and butterscotch notes). Enjoy it neat, on the rocks or in a cocktail. Whatever you decide, it will be a quality pour.

APPLETON ESTATE 8-YEAR-OLD RESERVE $32 The last time I was in Jamaica, I exclusively drank Appleton—because hey, when in Jamaica, one must enjoy all things local. And while I’m a fan of Appleton’s other expressions, master blender Joy Spence certainly outdid herself with this new one. On the nose, it’s still very emblematic of what Appleton stands for: The DNA is there, with its characteristic vanilla, orange and honey notes—but with more spice and boldness. The rum is a blend of 20 “reserve stock,” which Spence specifically set aside. And it’s a more nuanced rum that delivers a tad bit of a more of robust flavor.

DIPLOMATÍCO PLANAS $30 Not to be confused with the Diplomatico Blanco Reserva (which was discontinued in 2017), the Planas is a complex aged white rum rested in three different casks: ex-bourbon, ex-malt whiskey and American white oak. It’s an outlier in its own way: the blend of distillates is aged for up to six years before it goes through a char-

coal filtration system to eliminate the color acquired from the aging process, and to make the liquid smoother.

In a sense, it’s kind of like what the tequila industry does with its cristalinos. The result? A white sipping rum that would also work perfectly in any rum-forward cocktail, with its tropical notes of coconut and just a hint of pineapple. “We wanted to create a white rum that would match the premium quality of our other rums,” says José Rafael Ballesteros Meléndez, CEO of Diplomático. “We also understand how key white rum is to bartenders and cocktail mixing because of its transparency.”

FLOR DE CAÑA 25 $159 Flor de Caña has been around for more than 125 years—and that has given the Nicaraguan distillery more than ample time to refine its processes and distilling methods. However, this particular expression is not something you would break out at the end of a stressful day at work. What I’m saying is that it’s what one would call a “special occasion rum,” something to be enjoyed with a cigar while on vacation. At 25 years, clocking in 40 percent ABV, the expression is smoother than most and more complex. In addition to its dark toffee, chocolate and vanilla notes, tropical and stone fruits are also discernible on the palate.

By Karla Alindahao/Special to Polo Lifestyles page 119

VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

PATRONS' PLACE

INSIDE THE MIND OF A COLLECTOR RAPHAEL DAPAAH Art Contributor @dg_luxe

P

atrons’ Place” explores the collections and insights of budding and established art collectors and patrons. This series runs every other month with the artists’ Vernissage series, thus highlighting the contingent journeys of artists and collectors.

Name Renicha (Nish) McCree Occupation Advisor in the field of International Development Location Accra, Ghana Collector Level Collector RD: When did you buy your first piece of art, and what was it?

RM: I bought my first piece of art in an elementary school auction, which was over 35 years ago. As an adult, I started to seriously buy art for the love of it in 2013. I had the great opportunity to visit the studio of Rushern Baker IV, and I bought two of his paintings that day.

How many pieces of art do you currently have in your private collection?

Between contemporary art, 20th century African sculptures and masks and vintage, handmade ceramics and textiles, I have around 80 to 100 pieces.

What drew you to art collecting, and what does contemporary art by artists of African heritage mean to you? page 122

When I was a little girl, I watched my paternal grandmother make her very simple home a treasure trove of handmade art—much of which she made, like her enormous collection of ceramics

and quilts. She always had dozens of mini-collections of art carefully curated on tables, in armoires, and even draped around door frames. Her natural love of beauty and art helped me fall in love

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with the culture of collecting “art�, most importantly for the intrinsic value of the thing.

To this point, I was primed early in life

to value the work of art by artists of African heritage, and that, of course, included work by African Americans. As an adult, I became intentional about the study, serious admiration and invest-

ment in contemporary art by artists of African heritage. I easily relate the art of these artists to my life, personal history and sense of what I find beautiful. I feel like the work of artists of African heripage 123

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tage reflects back to me parts of myself and culture, and I love that connection.

I mostly collect art now to help preserve contemporary art for the next generation and ensure that I can enjoy beautiful, thought-provoking art in Ghana, where I live.

Which piece of art in your collection is your favorite, if any, and why?

Each work gives me a different experience when I interact with it. Depending on the day, one work may thrill me in an unexpected way, and at that moment, I think I am so blessed to live with that work of art. That said, if you must have an answer, at the moment, I enjoy my paintings by Amoako Boafo and Isshaq Ismail--both Ghanaian artists.

Name three living artists you would love to include in your collection in the future.

Why not just go for the top five? I would include Kerry James Marshall, El Anatsui, Sam Gilliam, Mark Bradford and David Hammons or Julie Mehretu, Lynette Yiadom-Boakye or Faith Ringgold. I dream big and obviously cannot fairly answer this question.

Name three late artists you would love to include in your collection in the future.

I would be so happy to live with art by Norman Lewis, Ed Clark and William H. Johnson.

If you could have dinner with any artist, dead or alive, who would it be, and why?

I would be overjoyed to have dinner with Kerry James Marshall. He is a lovely, freethinking artist who is not afraid to express his creative genius. I would count it a real blessing to share a meal with him and talk about the creative muse, black love, which he paints with brilliance and growing up in Alabama, as I am also an Alabama native.

What about an artist and their work attracts you the most?

I am attracted to the way an artist pushes her/his practice outside of any confines. Work that attracts me has a sincerity and sense of freeness of expression. I find this unlimited kind of creativity to be a great inspiration to me, and it helps me think about the way I want to create something of beauty to give to the world.

Is there a particular theme to your collection?

Yes, so far, I mostly connect with emerg-

ing artists from African countries and support their art practice. I just love the joy of making meaningful and trustworthy relationships with these emerging artists and watching them unfold their genius over time.

What advice would you give to a new/ budding art collector who wants to start a collection?

Here are my top five pieces of advice: Discover what you like and study and learn about it--really go down the rabbit hole to deeply gain knowledge. Find a mentor collector friend to help you understand the art of collecting. If you can’t find anyone, start your own small group of art collectors. Buy art primarily for the passion and love of it and not for the potential profit. Realize there is an imposed hierarchy in the ‘art world,’ so don’t be naive about it. Finally, find joy in collecting art and have fun with it.

What advice would you give to unknown and emerging artists who want to attract collectors and art patrons?

Don’t be afraid to reach out and connect with collectors and art patrons. I find that most collectors really enjoy having personal relationships with artists. It’s so much more meaningful that way.

By Raphael K. Dapaah Art Contributor Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

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SPIRITUALITY DEFINING THE DIVINE

NAVIGATING 2020

WITH INTENTION, FOCUS & CONTROL “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

CORINTHIANS 4:17:18 JYOTI PAINTEL Spirituality contributor @jyotipaintel

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n the middle of this catastrophic year, most of us have some mild form of depression, as not too many of us have been left unscathed.

We need solid strategies and coping mechanisms to help us get through this pandemic, and if need be, prepare us for the possibility of doing it for the long haul. One thing is for sure, no amount of news-watching brings any comfort that the pandemic will end soon, or security that we will ever go back to the way things were.

FINDING OUR FOUNTAIN OF FAITH I am still shocked when people contact me for spiritual advice even though I have been writing a monthly column on spirituality for a few years now. I took it all quite seriously, so I asked myself

many questions that took me on many journeys for the answers. Along the way, I practiced using meditation, music, chanting, song and prayer and sacred ceremonies to experience what we all hope to seek: Union with the Divine.

Like sharpening a very fine knife, opening your Third Eye is done with intention, focus and control.

While some find my study and pursuit of mystical powers charming, I am careful not to bring it up in some professional and social circles for fear they might not take me too seriously anymore.

The very connotation of mysticism conjures up images of otherworldly type people living outside of societylong-haired yogis and nuns performing ritualistic practices such as Orthodox monks singing in their haunting voices and Sufi’s whirling like tornado dervishes.

The definition of mysticism is often left open for interpretation considering it is a common theme in most religions or belief systems, but the methods and means of achieving it are always the same across different cultures: seeking truth (answers about the real meaning

of life) and seeking Union with the Divine or Oneness. In theology, it is a state of non-duality and connection to a higher power or being in contact with the Divine.

The reality is that mystics are not just nuns, yogis, monks or those who have otherwise dedicated their lives to religion, but ordinary people like us who do not live in ashrams or monasteries and must keep one foot in both worlds: Heaven and Earth.

I know of those seekers who spend too much time on heavenly pursuits as a form of escapism and neglect their responsibilities to the practicalities of life, and I also know of those heavily weighted to their earth duties and completely unable to disengage from their problems to give themselves a much-needed escape.

But we need not devote our whole life to discovering the divine to experience mysticism.

Indeed, for decades now, Dr. Deepak Chopra, a well-known, self-help guru of mystical Indian practices, has been teaching ordinary people worldwide about the concepts and practices of page 129

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SPIRITUALITY DEFINING THE DIVINE

NAVIGATING 2020

WITH INTENTION, FOCUS & CONTROL meditation as a way of experiencing Truth and Union.

plausible reality of everything in front of our eyes.

In one of his teachings “21 Days of Gratitude,” Dr. Chopra describes achieving the state of “grace” (one of the answers we find when we seek Truth):

In filmmaking, this ability to allow ourselves to “escape” into the story world created for us has been coined “the suspension of disbelief.” I often relate to this theme when writing about a subject as abstract as spirituality and the divine because I am trying to do the same: invite my readers to step out of the path of reality and walk the mystic path.

“...The way I was raised, grace was only given to those who were ascended or exalted, something rare. Today, I know it is more like the rain – falling on each of us alike. This is closer to the reality of it.”

In the world of spirituality, if we are to explore concepts that are ethereal, unexplainable and maybe even elusive in nature, it requires that we briefly suspend our need for the tangible proof that we rely on daily to make observations of a physical nature. This “letting go” can prove difficult to do for anyone skeptical of practices that are not evidence-based or proven scientifically.

Yet, when we need to, for a few hours, we can “let go.” We are able to entertain these very concepts while watching science-fiction or adventure movies or television without questioning the

The beauty of mysticism is that it encompasses all faiths and doctrines, but it is not something that you can do half-heartedly. Turning inward and in return, finding the unique talents and gifts that you have to exchange with others takes some time, devotion and discipline, but the payoff is pure ecstasy.

I recommend forming a spiritual group so you can be around others who share the same desires. Try doing this with a partner to help with any communication problems and heal any past hurts–plan in advance and talk about intentions.

Or invite some friends or neighbors from your trusted quarantine community that are also curious about mysticism and have the time to participate in ceremonies and rituals, perhaps a few times a week.

Not only does it create meaningful social events during a time of social exclusion but also a place to talk freely– something we all really need right now.

It is no surprise that gatherings of a spiritual nature have historically formed the backbone of a community. A place to share our joy and yes also our sorrow right now, and there is no need for it to take place in a church, mosque, or temple -can take place in your back yard or at a park near your home.

In next month’s column, I’ll explain some simple mystic practices that will help you open up the potential of your mystical superpower! For some real inspiration and ideas, go to superpowerwiki.com.

By Jyoti Paintel Spirituality Contributor Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

“THE WAY I WAS RAISED, GRACE WAS ONLY GIVEN TO THOSE WHO WERE ASCENDED OR EXALTED, SOMETHING RARE. TODAY, I KNOW IT IS MORE LIKE THE RAIN – FALLING ON EACH OF US ALIKE. THIS IS CLOSER TO THE REALITY OF IT.” DR. DEEPAK CHOPRA

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Recently, drinks at the bar turned into drinks in our individual homes, but that doesn’t mean you have to drink alone.

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To Health, We Drink ( W I N E T H AT I S )

“Cultivate no plant, my Verus, before the rows of sacred vine, Set in Tibur’s gentle soil, and by the walls Catilus founded: Because the god decreed all things are hard for those who never drink, And he gave us no better way to lessen our anxieties.”

- HORACE 65 BCE

CEZAR KUSIK Wine Contributor @cezartastesearth

A

s long as we are subjected to the hardships of this new restrictive and discomforting reality, I will be here to bring you a little bit of good news, words of encourage-

ment and a sense of hope. Could wine be the elixir of our betterment and an answer to some of our physical and spiritual ailments?

Let’s investigate. Before delving into the benefits of drinking wine, reluctantly, I have to start with a disclaimer: I, Cezar Kusik, declare that the benefits of drinking wine presented in this article may apply only to those who consume it in MODERATION. Many researchers and studies have been conducted in

recent decades that support the claims of the positive effects of moderate wine consumption on our overall health and well-being. Let’s make this clear; there is no question about the benefits of a healthy, alcohol-free lifestyle, but if approached modestly, wine can enrich your life on many levels.

The differences in the production of white vs. red wines are not significant, but they result in a substantial contrast in the wine’s composition. After presspage 133

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To Health, We Drink

ing the juice out of white grapes, all the pulp, including the skins and pits, is removed. In the case of red wines, following the pressing, the juice is exposed to prolonged maceration with the skins and seeds to extract the color and tannins. It is in the tannins where all the anti-oxidative compounds, including resveratrol, are located. So yes, when discussing the health benefits of wine, we mainly refer to red wine.

Resveratrol seems to be the frequently mentioned magic ingredient.

Resveratrol is a polyphenol whose high concentration is found in grape skin and seeds. Numerous studies have demonstrated that resveratrol exhibits multiple health-promoting qualities. It possesses a very high antioxidant potential and anticancer properties. It promotes cardiovascular health by decreasing LDL, “bad cholesterol” in our bloodstream and increasing HDL known as “good cholesterol”, which reduces the risks of heart disease. Furthermore, resveratrol

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is reported to play a big role in dementia and Alzheimer’s disease prevention.

Studies have shown that it enables a more effective oxygen supply and glucose to the brain to keep it functioning more efficiently. In 2006, scientists reported that red wine compounds called procyanidins might also help to reduce blood pressure.

works for me!

What about the psychological state of affairs? Depression is a clear and present danger in our society, affecting hundreds of thousands of people, preventing them from experiencing life at its fullest. A seven-year study conducted by PREDIMED analyzed 5,500 individuals discovering that those who drank two to seven glasses of wine a week were less prone to depression than non-drinkers.

But what about the close correlation between depression and alcoholism? That’s alcoholism. Again, MODERATION is the keyword here, and it seems that if approached in that fashion, wine will keep depression and anxiety at bay. It

Osteoporosis is a bone disease common to women in the later stages of their lives. One or two glasses of wine have been shown to prevent the bones from thinning.

Can wine help with another of modern humanity’s ills—obesity? Wine, specifically white wine, contains antioxidants called epicatechin, quercetin and again, a bit of resveratrol. These compounds decrease bad cholesterol and inflammation usually associated with obesity.

Wine, and specifically resveratrol, seems to be helpful in the prevention of macular degeneration. It is an incurable, age-related eye disease that affects the central portion of the retina.

To smooth things out and wrap it all up in a pretty package, another study showed that wine could keep our skin healthier. The antioxidants rejuvenate the skin by improving its elasticity and

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adding luster. Wine can also stimulate blood circulation that can prevent wrinkle formation.

Aside from the tangible health benefits wine has to offer, it also, just as importantly, adds a touch of magic into our lives. That magic starts in the vineyards with the beauty and the labor of all the stages of grape growing where the results depend on the harmonious coexistence of nature and people. With the miracle of fermentation, that magic is carried all the way through to our wine glass, and to that sublime sensation of soulful warmth with a multitude of flavors and aromas on our palates. It inspires and emboldens. It brings people together in the environment of sharing, friendship and intimacy. Wine is the Yin and Yang. It combines the joy of living with the quest for longevity, and it seems to be the answer to both. Wine is laughter, wine is an embrace, but most importantly, it is a story of what was, what is and what is to come.

The author, sommelier Cezar Kusik, with some favorite bottles of Zinfandel.

While working from home or not working at all the temptations of having drink are many and our defenses compromised. That is why our discipline is in high demand right now. As shown above, wine can have a positive impact on many aspects of our overall wellbeing. So, drink responsibly and moderately my friends and I see the light at the end of the tunnel!

By Cezar Kusik Wine Contributor Polo Lifestyles 2020 •

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VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

SMART PHILANTHROPY IN THE AGE OF COVID-19 DO N O R A DV I S E D FU N DS

BILL SMITH Philanthropy contributor @willismith_2000

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s COVID-19 continues to wreak havoc on economies and lives, it has also brought out some of the most extraordinary philanthropy in human history.

People are giving more than ever before in amounts, both large and small and in support of efforts at the most local level to those on a global scale. As the worldwide battle against the virus rages, the human spirit’s goodness is showing up as philanthropy on steroids.

This profound growth pattern in charitable giving has given rise to many questions among those who are giving. Having headed a community foundation, many of these conservations with donors turned to page 138

not just what should be supported, but the “How?” And the most significant growth in the “how” is the explosive expansion globally of what are called Donor Advised Funds or DAFs for short.

So, in a bit of a departure from this column’s coverage of the fabulous ins and out of philanthropic activity, this month’s column is more of a “how-to” in accomplishing your giving goals.

Philanthropy, at the level of the individual or family, comes in many forms. It can be a retired person living on a fixed income and donating their time in volunteering for a food pantry. It can be a youth group doing a cleanup of a city park. It can be dropping off clothes at a homeless shelter or taking the haul from a good house purging to the Goodwill. And when it comes to giving away money, the diversity is huge. From contributing a few dollars to a GoFundMe effort, to writing checks from one’s checkbook to favored nonprofit organizations, to establishing one’s foundation, quickly emerging among these

many options for contributing money are DAFs. DAF’s are far from new. The first was established in 1931 at the New York Community Trust and, for decades, remained largely within the domain of large community foundations, like the New York Community Trust, that could create scale and manage them efficiently.

DAFs are now part and parcel of the model for most community foundations, have become behemoths within well-known banking and investment institutions, spawned boutique firms for exclusive clients and are even finding traction within more traditional nonprofit organizations.

DAFs are also now a larger part of the global philanthropic ecosystem.

According to the trade publication Business Wire, “DAFs have become one of the fastest-growing giving vehicles, used by philanthropists in the U.K., Europe, Middle East and Asia.”

So, what is all the buzz about?

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PHILANTHROPY IN FOCUS

The benefit of a DAF is that it allows a donor to take advantage of moving a greater amount of charitable money into an account, taking the full tax advantages of that move in a single year, but then allows the donor to decide on exactly how to disburse that money over a longer time period.

For example, let’s say that you had decided to make a $25,000 commitment to support nonprofits in 2020, but were not quite sure which organizations you wanted to back with that full amount. Opening a DAF would allow you to account for that gift in the current tax year. Still, you could have a virtually unlimited amount of time to decide which nonprofits eventually received those dollars. And in nearly all instances, DAFs can grow with additional contributions from the donor and from earnings on how the host institution invest those dollars.

The key to all of this working legally in the U.S. is that host institutions for DAFs are themselves nonprofit, 501(c)(3) public charities. So, when the donor opens a DAF, they are essentially making a gift to a nonprofit, that in turn, allows the donor to recommend grants from that account to other public charities. Note I said “recommend” – legally, the money no longer belongs to the donor, but rather to the

nonprofit, host institution. As a result, the donor “recommends” that grants are made to another nonprofit from their DAF, and the host institution approves that recommendation.

Most host institutions of DAFs have a minimum balance to open an account, which can vary widely. One large charitable arm of an investment firm, for example, allows you to create an account online with an opening balance of at least $5,000 USD. Many community foundations have a higher opening minimum.

Fees are also a consideration. The larger financial firms, with much greater scales, can offer lower fees. But fees are also often a reflection of the services provided.

Community foundations, for example, may have slightly higher fees on a DAF, but the donor will likely be able to unlock the local expertise of that community foundation to engage in more impactful and leveraged grant-making. However, the DAF holder may often know exactly what they want to give to and need no assistance beyond transactional efficiency.

There are other considerations in opening a DAF as well. For example, host institutions may set a minimum for the amount in which a grant can be made. Grants from DAFs can also not be utilized to pay

membership dues, fulfill a pledge and the donor can receive no gifts for the grant.

There is also typically an “inactive funds” policy maintained by host institutions that require some minimal distribution be made to keep the fund “active.”

One final point that frequently pops up in speaking to larger dollar philanthropists is whether they should open a DAF or create their own foundation. There is no easy answer to this question as each approach has its own benefits and drawbacks. The advantage of a DAF is that the burden of paperwork shifts nearly entirely to the host institution. A DAF also provides the donor an ability to be entirely anonymous should they choose to do so (something much more difficult to achieve for the benefactors behind a private foundation).

A simple Internet search will yield dozens of references that explain the differences between a DAF and a private foundation.

Read several and compare as most want to lead you down a certain decision path.

Whatever vehicle one chooses to accomplish their charitable giving, it’s clear that DAFs have come into great favor. And the ease and flexibility they provide is paying off – for nearly a decade, according to the National Philanthropic Trust, grants to nonprofits from DAFs have grown year over year. That’s philanthropy in action. page 139

VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

RANCHO SAN CARLOS 2500 East Valley Road Montecito, California, 93108 United States

$75,000,000 USD 12 BEDROOMS / 11.5 BATHS / 29,483 SQ. FT / 237.82 ACRES

The magnificent Rancho San Carlos, an approx. 237-acre estate property that for nearly 100 years has been under the ownership of one family. A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to acquire a unique property of unprecedented grand scale, exceptional architecture, and historical significance.

The sprawling hilltop Monterey Colonial manor was designed by noted architect Reginald Johnson in 1931 with an approx.

29,483-sq. ft. exquisite main residence comprised of over 30 rooms. Infused with an atmosphere of sophistication and refinement, the grand home is astutely sited on two natural terraces, and by planning the formal living rooms around a central courtyard and placing the master and family bedroom wings on the upper terrace, he effectively created a spatial separation that afforded privacy, calm and exceptional views.

Additional features include 10 residential cottages, an office, producing orchards, and extensive equestrian facilities. page 142

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VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

1000 LAUREL WAY Beverly Hills, California, 90210 United States

$39,900,000 7 BEDROOMS / 9 FULL BATHS / 5 PARTIAL BATHS / 15,803 SQ FT / 0.78 ACRES

Designed by renowned architectural firm Studio William Hefner, this brandnew construction is a true example of exquisite craftsmanship, refinement and sophistication.

Situated behind private and discrete gates leading to the half-motor court page 144

and dramatic formal entrance welcoming you to a foyer featuring high ceilings, an abundance of natural light coming from a skylight and a grand chandelier.

Surrounded by floor-to-ceiling windows, the light-filled formal living room opens up to the coveted patio offering a stylish indoor/outdoor space for entertaining. Double French doors lead to the gentleman`s room with en-suite bathroom and a fireplace. A striking sculptural staircase decorates the path to the upper family room and four en-suite bedrooms, including an exceptional master suite with dual bathroom wings, private bar, showroom

closets and several balconies overlooking the stunning backyard and the pool.

This meticulously crafted masterpiece features a gourmet kitchen, sous-kitchen, formal dining room, family room, maid`s quarters, home theater, bar and wine cellar, subterranean garage, gym, sauna, staff suite and elevator.

A detached guest house and magnificent grounds, including a pool, water and fire features, several patios and decks, outdoor kitchen and dining area and expansive lawns complete this unprecedented offering, just a heartbeat from the renowned shops and restaurants of Beverly Hills.

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VOLUME IV / ISSUE V / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020

14 EAST 11TH STREET New York, New York, 10003 United States

$28,500,000 5 BEDROOMS / 6 FULL BATHS / 2 PARTIAL BATHS / 7,411 SQ FT.

Located on one of Greenwich Village’s most bucolic tree-lined blocks, this stunning 21’ wide townhouse is noteworthy for its handsome Italianate brick façade, and painstaking two-year renovation.

Sun-filled, open and airy, the 7411 square foot house comprises five stories, an immaculately finished basement, over 1400 square feet of manicured gardens and terraces, and a private elevator.

This one-of-a-kind home, conceived by designer Brad Ford, is matchless in page 146

scale, attention to detail and quality of finish.

Enter the Parlor Floor, which is distinguished by 12’5” soaring ceilings, a breathtaking 53’ tall cascading Lindsey Adelman chandelier, herringbone floors in cerused quarter-sawn white oak and a surround of custom wood-paneled walls. Designed for entertaining, one can easily lounge in the grand living room highlighted by ornamental plasterwork, a breccia capraia marble fireplace and a southern glass wall of windows overlooking the beautiful gardens. Alternatively, stroll down to the wine bar and coffee room surrounded by a Dean Barger mural and Amuneal Industry built-ins.

A gracious descending staircase leads to the wonderful eat-in kitchen - distinguished by superb cabinetry, top of

the line appliances including range by Florence Officine Gullo and two aged brass sinks. The accordion glass wall creates the ultimate indoor/outdoor experience, opening to a stylish bi-level garden - designed by Harrison Green.

The owner’s suite occupies the fourth floor and incorporates a wood-burning fireplace, an abundance of closets and a luxurious bathroom clad in breccia capraia marble with a custom fireplace mantel.

There are four additional bedrooms, all with en suite baths. Atop the home sits an expansive, fully appointed rooftop terrace. The finished basement offers a gym, playroom, powder room and Laundry room (one of two in the house).This smart home is replete with a Control 4 system governing the 10-zone CAC, lighting, AV, and security systems.

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THE LONGEVITY DIET CARBS AREN'T THE ENEMY DR. VALTER LONGO ON FOOD, LONGEVITY AND SKIN trition—makes a major difference,” he says. “We think a plant-based pescatarian diet, which is associated with longevity, can likely affect the look of the face and skin.” Below, his advice on how to have a long life, age gracefully, and even have a little dessert every night.

A Q&A with Valter Longo, PhD

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e have all met people who look curiously years or even decades younger than they actually are; Dr. Valter Longo explains his theory regarding why that is—and, in particular, how food can impact the difference between your chronological age (the number of years you have been alive) and biological age (the age at which your body functions and appears to be).

The director of the Longevity Institute at the University of Southern California and the Program on Longevity and Cancer at IFOM in Milan, Longo has devoted his career to researching aging, disease and how to optimize health and longevity through nutrition.

His international bestseller, “The Longevity Diet” proposes that sticking to a plant-based pescatarian diet and implementing periodic fasting-mimicking techniques—nutritional programs that cause effects on metabolism and cellular function similar to those caused by water-only fasting—a few times a year is the best recipe for living longer, living better and even looking better.

“What you put into your body—nupage 150

Q: Preliminary research has shown that fasting can promote cell rejuvenation and longevity—do the benefits also show up on skin?

A: While we do not yet have direct evidence, it would make sense that if there is a little bit of cleanup going on everywhere, it’s also happening in the skin. Most cells in our system are going to respond in a similarly. Some organs and systems are affected more quickly— for example, changes in the white blood cells may happen more rapidly than changes in the skin, but it makes sense that changes in the skin would follow.

We are now doing molecular studies to test that.

Q: How are skin age and overall age linked? Are we able to slow down skin aging and overall aging?

A: If someone is chronologically 80 years old, but when you measure markers in their blood, their biological age is actually 95, in my experience, their skin and face look older than 80. If the face looks older, our hypothesis is that most likely, the rest of the body is older, their cells and systems are functioning older and that person most likely has an increased mortality rate. The face—the look of skin and wrinkles—seems to

be very reflective of the aging status of the entire body; the slower you age, the better your face is going to look. And we think a plant-based pescatarian diet, which is associated with longevity, can likely affect the face and skin’s look.

After Gwyneth did the fast-mimicking diet in the documentary “The goop Lab”, her biological age was reduced by 1.7 years. So theoretically, if someone were to do a fast-mimicking diet a couple of times a year for a few years, the skin could reflect that rejuvenation process by aging more slowly. This may explain the anecdotal comments we’re hearing from a lot of people about how their skin looks younger.

Q: How significant can the discrepancy be between someone’s biological age and chronological age?

A: It would be almost impossible to see a 100-year-old person whom you couldn’t tell was around 100. You might guess she was 83 or 110, but her older age would be reflected very, very well in her skin. Of course, from 83 to 110 is a range of 27 years, so that means someone could be 20 to 30 years biologically younger than their chronological age.

That’s not very common, but certainly it is possible. It’s why some people die of age-related diseases at 57, and some people never get age-related diseases and die at 110. A study a few years ago was done on a number of 38-year-olds to determine their biological ages. It turned out their biological ages ranged from under 30 years old to over 60. That discrepancy in years is most likely dictated by a combination of good genes, diet and exercise.

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Q: What are the most important factors that influence aging and the way the physical signs of aging show up in skin?

A: Nutrition and genes play the most important roles. If you are born with “supergenes,” you may always be ahead of the curve in terms of your biological age: When you are 50, you might look 40; when you are 40, you might look 32; when you are 30, people might think you are 24. So yes, some people are genetically predisposed to looking younger than they are and aging more slowly.

These are usually the families where you see many members making it to 90 or older. Where you live isn’t always an important factor. People in New York tend to have pretty long lives. So this

idea that you need to live on a hill in the countryside in the middle of nowhere to live long—it definitely helps to be there, but it’s not everything. And exercise is important.

Q: You’ve done studies on how exercise can decrease mortality. Can it also benefit skin?

A: Exercise is important, but it’s a distant second after nutrition in terms of affecting aging. I would say 70 to 80% of how we age is nutrition, and then 20 to 30% is exercise, so most likely, the same is true for skin aging. Exercise causes the body to undergo stress, and that stress is usually associated with at least a small rejuvenation process—not as big of a

rejuvenation process as we get from fasting, though. There is a lot of evidence that exercise can increase stem cells.

Exercise is important for overall health, which affects skin health. If you do 150 minutes a week of exercise and devote 10% of that time to more-strenuous exercise, that seems to be a very good recipe for doing well. It’s associated with greater than a 30% decrease in mortality.

So, a big effect. Interestingly, if you do more exercise than that and go up to 300 minutes, there does not seem to be that much more of a benefit. That’s based on a large study.

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THE LONGEVITY DIET CARBS AREN'T THE ENEMY

be in addition to—and not instead of—the 150 minutes a week of exercise.

I do between 12,000 and 15,000 steps a day. Walk everywhere. Always take the stairs. The people who live to 110 and 117, almost all of them, this is how they operate. People always say, “Let me go to a restaurant or coffee shop that’s close by.” Do the opposite. Pick a place that is farther away so that you have to walk forty minutes to go get a coffee and come back. I do this twice a day. That’s a really good habit.

Q: How effective is skincare in helping with the physical signs of aging?

A: The skin and body are very sophisticated, and to regulate the way they age, you need to do that from the very center of control, which seems to be the growth hormone receptor pathway. Putting cream on your skin can help, but it’s the same idea as trying to make a symphony better by making just the cello play louder. Treat skin from the inside with things we know will be beneficial to your entire system, including the skin.

The only thing I use on my skin is a natural moisturizer that does not have any inflammatory components or harmful chemicals. Dry skin is a problem and can start an inflammatory process, so moisturizer can be important.

Q: Many people are surprised by your approach to carbohydrates: You eat bread and pasta almost every day. What is a healthy way to incorporate carbohydrates into our diet that’s not harmful to the body and how the skin looks?

A: People forget that our number one fuel is sugar. Our brain works on sugar.

But a problem emerges when you eat

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too much of it and keep producing insulin; you become insulin resistant, and then sugar intake can cause all kinds of problems. Most people in the U.S. are not eating the right amount of carbohydrates. Over 70% are overweight or obese and could benefit from eating fewer sugars and starches—so less bread, pasta and potatoes. If you tend to gain weight or are overweight, the best way to return to a healthy weight is to reduce starches and sugar.

But if you look at the people who live longest around the world, the data shows that it’s actually better to have an 80% carbohydrate diet than to have a low-carbohydrate diet. This again is meta-analysis—the studies of many studies.

The ideal is a 60% carbohydrate diet.

Eating organic, if you can, is very important. People confuse what a healthy level of carbohydrates, sugars and starches is. I eat pasta and bread almost every day, yet I maintain my weight and BMI (body mass index, a measurement derived from a person’s weight and height that’s used to diagnose healthy body fat ratio). That is what the centenarians of Okinawa and the centenarians of Italy do—they eat lots of carbohydrates, and most of them stay within a healthy BMI range.

Q: What is a healthy amount of carbs to eat daily?

A: The ratio of different foods on your plate is what really matters. I’ll have two ounces of pasta once a day, with, say, ten ounces of chickpeas, and five to seven ounces of mixed vegetables with lots of olive oil and some Parmesan cheese.

That’s a typical dish for me and some-

thing that I eat six or seven times a week in different formats, different vegetables, different legumes. That’s a very healthy type of meal.

What’s very unhealthy and something that 80% of Americans do is have a big dish of rice, a big dish of pasta, a big ball of bread. At a restaurant, they will give you a big basket of bread and then a big dish of pasta right after. We have to change that mentality. When you eat a big serving of bread or other simple forms of carbohydrates, it gets into the bloodstream very quickly, almost as quickly as it would if you ate spoonfuls of straight-up sugar. The glycemic index of pasta is lower, so pasta gets into your blood a little bit slower. But when you eat a lot of vegetables, you’re getting nutrients, fiber and all the right components. You feel full longer, for four or five hours. Without the vegetables, a big bowl of rice on its own causes you to feel hungry an hour later and have high levels of insulin in your bloodstream.

Q: Do you ever eat dessert?

A: Every night: 85% dark chocolate. If I am a guest somewhere and they’re serving cake, I may have some. But once you start eating well, I think you appreciate how healthy food tastes—complex food, good vegetables, good legumes, good olive oil—way more than you appreciate the junk.

Valter Longo, PhD, is the Edna Jones Professor in Gerontology and Professor in Biological Science at USC. He is the director of the USC Longevity Institute and of the Program of Longevity and Cancer at IFOM in Milan, and he is also the author of The Longevity Diet.

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MOLD YOUR MIND WHAT TYPE OF LEADER ARE YOU? 3 WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR LEADERSHIP JOEY VELEZ MA, MBA @velezmentalperformance Healthy Lifestyles Contributor

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n my work with the U.S. Army, a common phrase heard amongst drill sergeants is, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink”.

You can provide an individual with tools for success, but you have no control over whether they use them. Another common phrase I am sure most of you have heard comes from parents, when they ask, “If (fill in the blank) were to jump off a bridge, would you jump to?”

Whether you can relate to either of the two adages or not, both draw our attention to leadership. Leadership is the process whereby an individual influences a group of individuals to achieve a common goal. The main responsibilities of a leader page 154

are to create a shared vision for the group, motivate and join them in the pursuit of that vision, generate optimism and trust to achieve results. Being a leader can be a difficult job, but when done effectively, can have a tremendous impact on productivity and success.

Common Themes in Leadership One common misconception of leadership is that there is one specific set of traits or a particular personality profile that is better than the others. No two leaders are the same. While there may be some overlap in certain characteristics, the way they lead, the things they say and the values they pull from, their leadership role vary from person to person. Another misconception of leadership is that its effectiveness solely relies on the leader’s personal traits. Effective leadership consists of four major themes: personal traits, leadership style, followers’ traits and situational factors.

The first theme is personal traits, where many successful leaders share common characteristics. These include things like integrity, confidence, accountability and preparedness. While there is no one size

fits all answer, the qualities you possess play a role in how you lead.

The second theme is leadership style, which is typically displayed when it comes to decision-making. There are five types of leadership styles: Autocratic, AutocraticConsultative, Consultative-Individual, Consultative-Group and Group.

Autocratic refers to solving the problem yourself using available information.

Autocratic-Consultative refers to gathering information from relevant individuals before making a decision. ConsultativeIndividual refers to discussing the problem with each individual and then making a decision. Consultative-Group refers to discussing the issue with the group and then making a decision and Group refers to sharing the issue with the group and coming to a joint decision. Every leader has a preferred style, each has their benefits, but there are varying factors where a certain type of leadership style may be more effective.

The third theme is the situational factors involved. This refers to variables like the environment you are in, the size of the group, how much time you have available,

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if you are new to the group, what type of leadership has there been in the past and what resources you have available to you, etc. While you may have a particular way to act as a leader, being aware of the situational factors is key because adjusting or altering the way you lead to those situations can increase your effectiveness.

Finally, the fourth theme is the traits of the individuals you are leading. This can refer to the individuals’ experience level, their ability, personality, maturity and even their nationality. Earlier I mentioned that no two leaders are alike, well the same goes for the members of your team. No two individuals are alike. While individual A might not mind getting yelled at to increase motivation, individual B might take getting yelled at personally, decreasing motivation and productivity.

An important aspect of a leader is catering to each individual. This may take time, but you must discover what makes each individual tick to be an effective leader.

Learning to Lead While coaching high school basketball, I encountered 15 very different boys each year. Rarely did I have players for consecutive seasons, so from the get-go, my move as a coach was to discover how to lead each boy effectively. There were years I had to walk individuals through everything step by step, and then there were the ones when I could walk them through it one time, and they were good. There were years when I raised my voice to get through to someone, and there were times when I had to use a softer tone.

finished below .500. Disappointing? Yes, but where I found joy and successful was because of the feedback I received from the players. This year's team felt I cared for them, helped them improve as individuals and felt they were successful throughout this season.

The four returning players felt more engaged, more involved, they felt they improved, and appreciated how I interacted with them throughout the season.

By adjusting my leadership style, I broke through to a group of boys to help them feel successful and productive despite not always winning. How you lead has an astounding impact on those around you.

Improve Your Leadership Ability The first way to improve your leadership effectiveness is to reflect on your past experiences dealing with different leaders.

We've all had a terrible boss, manager, or leader. Answer this question: What did they do that you disliked? How did they make you feel? Or finish the statement, “I do not like it when leaders...” Use these questions to pick out behaviors or traits that you felt were ineffective that you would not want to incorporate into your philosophy as a leader. Now, think of a time when you had a great boss, manager, or leader and answer these questions: What did they do that you liked? How did they make you feel? Or finish the statement, “I like it when leaders…”

Use these questions to pick out behaviors or traits to incorporate into your philosophy as a leader.

With high school sports, there is a lot to cover in a short amount of time. My first year as a head coach, I focused most of my attention on making sure everybody understood the fundamentals of the game; however, we were not very successful.

The boys struggled to maintain focus and motivation. They also had a hard time listening and processing information, but I never thought about adjusting my leadership style.

Another way to increase your effectiveness as a leader is to identify your values.

Leading from a place of values helps drive action and leads to a display of consistent action that promotes optimal performance over time.

After reflecting during the off-season, my goal for my second year was to focus more on the leadership aspect first and then implement a more fundamental focus.

Record-wise, we were more successful than the season before, but we still

Once you identify this decision, the next step is to answer the question in seven words or less: “Why was this a big decision?” I answered this question by saying, “To take charge of my own life”.

One way to identify your values is to think about a big decision made in the last two years. For me, it was the decision to accept employment 2,500 miles away during a pandemic.

Finally, choose one word to describe your answer to the previous question. I said accountability. Moving across the country for new employment helped me take accountability of my life. I did not know anyone in my new town, could not rely on anyone else, it was me and that was it. This one word is a core value of yours because it was a key factor in an important life decision. Identifying your core values help develop consistency in your actions and decisions, help develop clearer expectations for yourself and your organization, and allow you to behave your more authentic self in the process.

Finally, you want to take inventory of the team you have around you. Not in terms of “is this person the right fit for my team,” but getting to know them, who they are, and what their core values are.

You can take the previous activities about identifying past leaders, what you liked or disliked about them, and identifying core values and use them as conversation pieces with your team members. To be an effective leader, it is not just about you. By balancing your core values and who you want to be as a leader with the qualities of those you lead, you will become a more effective leader and the team performance will be more consistent.

Final Thoughts How you choose to act, choose to communicate and understanding the team around is vital because effective leadership has a major impact on success. Are you the type of leader that individuals want to follow off the edge of a cliff? Or are you the type of leader that individuals do not take seriously? Effective leaders provide others with opportunities to lead; they have a contagious energy about them, communicate from the heart and lead from a place of values.

They create this positive, enthusiastic, facilitative culture where individuals feel they are cared for, their work matters, and that they are appreciated.

Discover the type of leader you are, learn from your experiences, and learn more about your team to increase your effectiveness as a leader and to increase productivity throughout your organization. page 155