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Page 10 Our 4th Anniversary! July 2022

Zachary Levi

Actor Zachary Levi went from Suicidal to Superhero 'This is the Grace of God'

Zachary Levi is known for all his work in such shows as "Chuck" and "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel," as well as movies "Shazam," and "American Underdog." And now in a new book called, "Radical Love: Learning to accept yourself and others," Zachary is telling his life story that will shine a light of the importance of mental health. He shares his own personal journey on how he went from suicidal to a superhero in an interview.

Zachary Levi has starred in movie roles regularly. His private life is a little less known; his childhood was a painful one for him. As a child, he thought that his life was normal. He didn't know till later in his life that it wasn't anywhere close to normal. Zachary said, "There wasn't anything particularly traumatic that I could point to and say I am living a traumatized life. You don't realize that. Looking back on it, I can assure you

it was an incredibly traumatizing childhood. There was just lots and lots of unhealthy, toxic behavior that was going on. Again, I can tell you that there were things that were making me cry on a regular basis. And things that I was afraid of on a regular basis. But I didn't necessarily see those as being anything but normal. I guess this is probably what other kids deal

with as well. So that would be a snapshot into my life, I suppose."

But all that trauma of Zachary's childhood caught up with him after he became an adult. He said, "Young Zach was this, I don't know this young boy lost in a sea of estrogen, between my sisters, my mom, my aunts, my grandma. But fortunately, and this is the grace of God. Not just the grace of God, but the plans of God. I figured out very early on in life, probably around four when I figured out that I could make someone laugh intentionally. You don't know why. Around four, I was smart enough to go, 'I can do this thing, I could do X or Y and that would make somebody laugh', and I also knew that a laughing, smiling person feels good." Zachary also said, "And I never wanted to stop doing that. And I was immediately called to, addicted to, not realizing that because I was lost in this world of trying to find identity and value and worth and all that jazz, that I was both fulfilling a calling in my life, but also figuring out very

July 2022 Our 4th Anniversary! Page 11

Zachary Levi

quickly how to run away from metabolizing my pain, but the guy, bring the happy, bring the joy." As Zachary, being a quick study, seized a leading role early and this was an escape from his real life. It was a life filled with abuse, with a mom struggling with mental health and an absent father. Zachary said, "I was running from pain. My whole life I was running from pain. I'm grateful that I was able to find what I love to do, and what I was good at doing, at such a young age because I think a lot of people don't. Even though that was also something that was insulating me from doing a lot of the work that I needed to do that eventually led to me having a massive breakdown later on in life."

Zachary shares a story in his book. In it, he tells us about going from suicidal to superhero, then right back to suicidal again. He then took us back to that rock bottom time in his life. Zachary said, "I felt like I was failing. Ultimately, like most of my life, I

felt like a failure. Even though from the outside it looked like I was very much succeeding, but I am not succeeding on the level that I am supposed to or that I was called to."

With music, some Broadway, and the big and small movies on his resume, Zachary decided to leave Hollywood and he moved to Austin, Texas. He said, "I don't know anyone out there, and all of a sudden after 15 years of living in Los Angeles, having

community and support structure, I was now alone, I have blown up my life. I have now entirely failed. There is no coming back from this failure. I would say if suicide was climbing a ten-rung ladder, I was at rung nine."

Zachary also added, "Thankfully, I have family that surrounded me and supported me, were there for me, just enough for me to get up and go to therapy, life saving therapy. It was a perfect storm. It was 37 years of lots and lots of trauma, unhealed trauma. A real testament of how I think God works, and what we ought to prioritize; I didn't understand that. So to go away and do this therapy, finally, and figure out I haven't loved myself my entire life. And oh, this feeling that I have inside?

That's anxiety. I am glad I finally know what anxiety is." Therapy helped him with his healing, a renewal of his faith, and the role and character of a lifetime. He said, "Shazam! Literally happened while I was finishing up my therapy. But only because God was like, 'Good, now that you have done the thing, now I can give you the blessing. You would have self-destructed had I given you this blessing before you did the work.' And that's the work."

Zachary also talked about the transforming power of the "Radical Love" of Jesus.