The Good and Beautiful You_Extract

Introduction

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few years after the first three books in the Good and Beautiful Series (The Good and Beautiful God, The Good and Beautiful Life, and The Good and Beautiful Community) were published, I was in England speaking on the book series. My friend Joe Davis and I had dinner one evening. Joe said to me, “The book series has been one of the most helpful tools I have used in ministry. Thank you for your work.”

I thanked him for saying this. Then he said, “But you are missing one book.”

“What book is missing?” I asked.

“The Good and Beautiful You,” Joe said.

“Why do you say this, Joe?” “Because I have used the books with many groups, and while they have helped heal people’s false God narratives—which is crucial—I have found that many Christians have very toxic self‑ narratives, which makes it difficult—even impossible—to progress in their lives.”

I sat in silence for a while. In that moment I knew, intuitively, that Joe was right. I had assumed the trilogy was complete, but when he

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uttered those words, “the good and beautiful you,” I knew there would come a day when I would need to write this book. But at the time Joe said this to me, I was not ready to write this book. There is an old saying I like: “When you are ready, the right book will find you.” I think it is also true in writing: “When you are ready, the right book will emerge from you.”

Over the next few years in my own journey, I would discover new, wonderful truths about my identity. Some of these truths were things I had known but had forgotten and suddenly they came to life again in my soul. David Brooks said that he writes, in part, “to remind myself of the kind of life I want to live.” I suppose that is true of many of us who write. But in this case, it really happened. I was able, in writing this book, to rediscover the beauty and goodness of my own soul, and how my soul longs for things only God can provide. And I would learn that God, in Christ, has provided all of those things— for me, and for you. Writing this book has helped me to live the kind of life my soul has longed to live.

During the writing of this book, my mother and father-in-law, Penny and Emil Johnson, gave me a wonderful present. It is a framed print of one of my favorite sayings, “It is well with my soul.” They gave it to me just as this book was coming together, and it gave me great joy to have something on the wall that reminded me of the importance of wellness for our souls. Now when I see it every day, I am grateful for the journey this book took me on, and what a joy it is to say each day, “It is well with my soul.” Not because of anything I have done, but because God, who is good and beautiful, has provided everything our souls need.

BECOMI NG W HO YOU A R E I N CH R IST Before my mentor, Dallas Willard, passed over to glory, I asked him what he thought about the rapid rise of the Christian spiritual formation movement. He said, “It is a wonderful thing, but my fear is the Christian spiritual movement will continue to grow so rapidly that

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Introduction

the difficult work of establishing an anthropological foundation will not happen.” By “anthropological foundation,” Dallas was referring to a clear sense of the nature of the human person.

I asked, “Without an anthropological foundation, what will happen as a result?”

Dallas said, “The spiritual formation movement will degenerate into technique. It will focus on practices, and not on the soul.”

My sense is that Dallas’s prophecy has come true. Much of the teaching and writing on Christian spiritual formation focuses primarily on the disciplines—on the practices. And of course, the spiritual disciplines are wonderful tools in our formation. But why do we need a solid understanding of who we are in the process of spiritual formation? We need this foundation because Christian spiritual formation is not primarily about practices or the feelings they might engender. It is about becoming who you are in Christ.

Walking a labyrinth or engaging in lectio divina can be powerful practices, but the practices themselves are not the point. Christian spiritual formation is not primarily about helping you feel more spiritual, but it is about forming you in Christ.

In short, the Christian faith is not primarily about belief and The Christian faith is not practices; it is primarily about what kind of people Christians primarily about belief become. And who we are, who and practices; it is primarily we become, is a deep longing in about what kind of people our embodied souls. God deChristians become. signed us with a deep longing in our souls to be wanted, loved, alive, and connected to God. In Christ, we are all of these and more.

And when we live into this reality, we become the unique person God created us to be.

A writer who greatly influenced this book, Fr. Adrian van Kaam, once wrote,

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I must become the unique person I am meant to be. The more I become what my Creator called me to be originally, the more I will be united with my divine origin. I must find my original self as hidden in God. The original life of a Christian, as St. Paul says, is hidden in Christ.

Our true self—our original self—the one created by and for Christ, the one made in the image of Christ, is hidden in Christ. Christian spiritual formation, then, is the process of allowing that original Christ-created Christ image to emerge. I have discovered that inviting the Spirit to help me become more like Jesus produces much better results than trying to be “the best version of myself.” The practices we engage in are important in that they are means God uses, through the Spirit, to shape and form us. But we must never mistake the means for the ends.

M Y HOPE FOR YOU My hope for you as you read this book is that you will discover the good and beautiful you that Jesus created you to be. I pray that you will see yourself with wonder, see yourself as sacred—even though you are flawed and broken. I long for you to know that you are loved by God, forgiven for what you have done, and made alive by the power of Jesus’ resurrection. I have written this book with the hope that you will see that you have a sacred story, a sacred body, and a sacred longing for God that is at your core. I hope and pray that you come to know your unique calling in this life and your divine destiny for glory in the next.

But there is one more desire I have for you as you read and engage with this book: that you will see your neighbor in the same way. I pray that you will look at those you interact with—your friends and coworkers and family members, as well as those people you disagree with politically or socially or culturally—as sacred beings, loved by God, who are worthy of your compassion and kindness because they, too, are of divine origin.

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I wrote it because the series would not be complete without it. What was missing, as Joe pointed out, was a book that could help to correct the toxic self-narratives that are ruining so many lives. The true narrative about our identity, I discovered, cannot be disclosed by reason but only by revelation. Only God, through Christ, can reveal to us who we truly are. And in the end, what we discover—what I hope you discover—is that you are good and beautiful. In so doing, I pray that you will discover the person Jesus uniquely created you to be.

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SOUL TRAINING Holy Leisure

Dolce far niente—“the sweetness of doing nothing.”

One of the most powerful soul-training exercises I have ever done is a practice called holy leisure. In simple terms, holy leisure is “doing nothing, for God’s sake.” It is important to get the emphasis on the right clause: we do nothing, but we do it for God. Richard Foster writes about this in his classic book, Celebration of Discipline: The church Fathers often spoke of Otium Sanctum, “holy leisure.” It refers to a sense of balance in the life, an ability to be at peace through the activities of the day, an ability to rest and take time to enjoy beauty, an ability to pace ourselves. With our tendency to define people in terms of what they produce, we would do well to cultivate “holy leisure” with a determination that is ruthless to our datebooks.

I can think of no practice that is more needed for our frantic, fast-paced, over-scheduled world than holy leisure, for the reasons Richard describes.

The central tenet of this book is that we are created by God with everything we need, everything our souls long for, and that we do not have to strive to meet these needs. God fulfills these needs as gifts to us. But everything within us wants to control, to push, to earn, and to achieve. Holy leisure puts this desire to death like nothing else I

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have done. In a sense, it is the simplest of all practices: just . . . do . . . nothing. In another sense, it is the most challenging practice we can engage in. This is due in part to the fact that our world calls this “killing time,” which makes us feel false guilt when we do so. Nothing could be further from the truth. Holy leisure is “investing time” in resting in God. When we created The Spiritual Formation Workbook for Renovaré, I put holy leisure as one of many prescribed practices, which included other disciplines such as Bible reading, worship, prayer, and fellowship, to name a few. When Dallas Willard saw the list of practices, he pointed at holy leisure and said, “This will be the one people will find the most difficult.”

I said, “Surely not! I mean, doing nothing—what could be easier than that?”

Dallas was right. In every group in which I field-tested this list of practices, holy leisure was the one that people routinely said, “Yeah . . . I didn’t end up doing this one.”

Why was it so difficult? Because doing nothing is not something we ever do intentionally. To be sure, we all waste time now and again.

But to set aside time to do it—that is foreign to us. It just feels strange.

And it stirs up something within us that wants to do, to accomplish, to make the most of our . . . time.

The reason for beginning with this practice is to help us embed these narratives: life is a gift; we are a gift; we did not create ourselves or earn God’s love and forgiveness; we did not merit new life in Christ; and our future life in glory is not something we earn. We did nothing to receive these gifts. Practicing holy leisure is a way to live into this reality. To embrace simply being instead of doing is difficult for most of us. This practice, if we can endure it, will bring peace into our souls.

So how do you practice holy leisure?

• Set aside a set amount of time in your schedule.

• Start with five or ten minutes doing nothing. You may find that you can spend longer than five to ten, and if so you may want to

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try thirty or forty-five minutes—though this will be difficult for many, especially the first time if you have never done it.

• Find a comfortable place to sit still for this time period.

• Do not do anything that accomplishes something.

• Just be. Do not do.

Through the years I have done this practice in groups, and there are some common questions people ask. I will address some of the main ones: 1. Can I read my Bible during this time?

Answer: No. But if you feel a strong need to look up a passage, feel free to do so. Just be sure you are not reading as a means of preparing for some future task, such as a Bible study or sermon. Remember: you are not to accomplish anything.

2. Can I write in my journal during this time?

Answer: Maybe. If you are hit with an insight that you want to write down, feel free to write in a notebook or journal. But as with the Bible, be sure you are not using this time to do something. Your goal is to do nothing.

3. Can I take a walk during this time?

Answer: Maybe. Once again, it is all about your motive. If you are secretly trying to get in some exercise, then the answer is no. That would be accomplishing something. But if you find yourself outside and want to walk to a lovely spot, feel free to do so.

The point of this practice is to become comfortable doing nothing, which puts to death our need to establish our worth through what we accomplish. If we make this practice a part of the rhythm of our lives, we will discover the joy of unhurried living, as well as the blessing of knowing that all of life is grace.

In my experience, many people will find this very difficult, and for some, even unpleasant. Many people have even said to me, “When I

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tried holy leisure it was a disaster—an epic fail!” If that is the case for you, do not be discouraged. The rule of thumb for all soul-training exercises is this: do as you can, not as you can’t. Simply do this exercise for as long as you are able, and be at peace. Few people do it well the first time, so give yourself a lot of grace. Focus on being and not doing for as long as you are able, and count on it being easier the more you practice it.

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