Spring 2009 Vol. 51 No. 2
Entrusted into
our Hands
Abandoned, Vulnerable Children in Ethiopia
in this issue 4 6
Annual Report
Winter 2009 vol. 51 no. 2
Summary and Highlights of 2008
Our Vision Holt International is dedicated to carrying out God’s plan for every child to have a permanent, loving family.
Perspectives on Ethiopia Holt Board Members share their personal experiences of their recent trip to Ethiopia and how Holt is helping orphaned children and families have a better future
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Stories from Adoptive Families Families who have adopted from Thailand, China and Korea share their adoption stories, and a young woman adopted from the Philip-
Holt Chairman Will Dantzler found a very personal connection with the children of Ethiopia.
In 1955 Harry and Bertha Holt responded to the conviction that God had called them to help children left homeless by the Korean War. Though it took an act of the U.S. Congress, the Holts adopted eight of those children. But they were moved by the desperate plight of other orphaned children in Korea and other countries as well, so they founded Holt International Children’s Services in order to unite homeless children with families who would love them as their own. Today Holt International serves children and families in Bulgaria, Cambodia, China, Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (North Korea), Ethiopia, Guatemala, Haiti, India, Nepal, the Philippines, the Republic of Korea (South Korea), Romania, Thailand, Uganda, Ukraine, the United States and Vietnam. CEO Kim S. Brown Senior Vice-President of Marketing & Development Phillip A. Littleton Vice-President of Public Policy & Advocacy Susan Soon-keum Cox Vice-President of Finance & Administration Kevin Sweeney Vice-President of Adoption Services Lisa Vertulfo Vice-President of Program Development Robin Mauney
pines discusses growing up as an adopted child.
Dear Readers On the wall next to the computer monitor in my office, I’ve put up a photograph of a little boy I met in China last February. When I look over at Meng,* I can hear his voice—the high, gentle and reserved “nihao” (hello) of a boy nearly six years old. He looked right at me as I was taking his photo, and now he looks at me from China every day, questioning. He didn’t say it, but I feel it: “Can you find a family… for me?” The question is achingly poignant because Meng has hemophilia, and many people around him find it hard to believe that an adoptive family can be found for him. That’s part of why I feel so moved by his very real presence in my office. Meng’s life and future have come to mean a great deal to me. He deserves to know the love and belonging of a permanent family. I believe that somewhere there is a family who would love to have Meng as their own son, and that this is a dream worth believing in, worth fighting for. Meng is why the work of Holt International is important. In this issue of Holt International magazine, we include a brief report of 2008 accomplishments and finances. Holt is touching the lives of many children, but like Meng, each one of them is a very real person. Each one is looking at us to help them to have a permanent family. You can view some of these children on Holt’s photolisting and sponsorship pages. Choose a child and make it your mission to pray for him or her. I hope you take a child in Holt’s program into your heart.
Holt International magazine is published quarterly by Holt International Children’s Services, Inc., a nonprofit, Christian, childwelfare organization. While Holt International is responsible for the content of Holt International magazine, the viewpoints expressed in this publication are not necessarily those of the organization. Editor John Aeby Managing Editor Ashli Courtright Graphics Brian Campbell & Chloe Goldbloom Subscription Orders/Inquiries and Address Changes Send all editorial correspondence and changes of address to Holt International magazine, Holt International, P.O. Box 2880, Eugene, OR 97402. We ask for an annual donation of $20 to cover the cost of publication and mailing inside the United States and $40 outside the United States. Holt welcomes the contribution of letters and articles for publication, but assumes no responsibility for return of letters, manuscripts or photos. Reprint Information Permission from Holt International is required prior to reprinting any portion of Holt International magazine. Please direct reprint requests to editor John Aeby at 541/687.2202 or johna@holtinternational.org. Copyright ©2009 by Holt International Children’s Services, Inc. ISSN 1047-7640
ACCREDITED BY
COUNCIL ON ACCREDITATION
* Name altered
John Aeby |
Editor
Holt’s Waiting Child photolisting:holtinternational.org/waitingchild/photolisting Children needing sponsors: holtinternational.org/sponsorship Blog and video of Meng: http://holtintl.org/blog/?p=421#more-421
P.O. Box 2880 (1195 City View) Eugene, OR 97402 Ph: 541/687.2202 Fax: 541/683.6175
directions Entrusted into our hands A child just brought into care reveals the importance of our work Authorities brought an infant girl to the orphanage only a day
The numbers represent lives changed—not just helped for a
before I reached down and lifted her out of her crib. Found outside
while, but changed for good… changed forever. I believe that is
a nearby social welfare office, and only a couple days old, this very
the most effective and efficient use of the funds entrusted to us
small girl hadn’t even been named yet. She slept and made soft
by you, our supporters.
breathing noises as I held her. She had been through a lot in the short span of her life. We may never know the circumstances that led her birth par-
Thank you, and God bless,
Kim S. Brown |
CEO
ents to leave this precious, little girl. But it’s likely they thought this to be the best thing they could do for her. As a final act of love, they dressed her, wrapped her in a blanket and made sure she would be found right away and brought to a safe place. Holding this tiny child I felt the profound responsibility we have at Holt International. At this crucial stage in this little girl’s life, her potential and future rest in our hands. In a way, her birth parents entrusted her to us with the hope and sorrow they must have felt as they laid her down for the last time. I think, too, of her future adoptive parents. They don’t even know it yet, but here is their daughter… in my arms. All of this is possible because of the support and involvement of so many in the extended “Holt International family.” I’m grateful for the host of people who enable Holt International to be their arms reaching out to children in need of families. You are all helping to hold this little girl and so many others. You are providing care and encouragement these children need through some of the most critical times of their lives. The children rely upon us for the things they need now and their hope for the future. Since Harry and Bertha Holt began this work in the 1950s, we have devoted this organization to the loving care of orphaned, abandoned and vulnerable children, with the ultimate goal of seeing each one united with a permanent, loving family. In the following pages we include a brief synopsis of Holt's 2008 children and strive to find the best permanent home for each one. Just like the little girl I held at the orphanage in China, we will care for and nurture the children until each one can be placed into the arms of a permanent family. The number of children we helped last year reflects this intensive, individual focus of our work.
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Holt I nt e r n at ion a l .or g
achievements and finances. We focus our efforts on individual
Finding families for children
A partnership for children The partnership between Holt and its supporters FKDQJHV FKLOGUHQ¡V OLYHV ,W DOVR VLJQLÀHV RXU DFFRXQWability for the effective use of contributed funds. We VWULYH WR XVH RXU ÀQDQFLDO UHVRXUFHV HIIHFWLYHO\ DQG HIÀFLHQWO\ +ROW XQGHUJRHV DQ DQQXDO DXGLW SHUIRUPHG E\ DQ LQGHSHQGHQW DFFRXQWLQJ ÀUP 7KH IROORZLQJ charts are based upon the report of Jones and Roth &3$V $ FRPSOHWH DXGLW UHSRUW LV DYDLODEOH DQG JODGO\ provided upon request. The downloadable version is also available on our website: holtinternational.org.
in 2008 Holt’s programs around the world
JOHUNLK JOPSKYLUÂťZ SP]LZ MVYL]LY a n n u a l
r e p o r t
2008 Ă„UHUJPHS OPNOSPNO[Z 2008
2007
Contributions & Grants
SOURCES OF REVENUE
$9,851,571
$ 9,088,984
Adoption & Related Service Fees
11,375,809
9,651,438
Other Revenue
49,152
53,710
(1,516,778)
446,715
$ 19,759,754
$ 19,240,847
$ 16,705,289
$ 14,744,091
Management & General
2,172,736
1,799,132
Fundraising
2,355,738
2,340,172
$ 21,233,763
$ 18,883,395
Investment Gains/(Losses) Total Revenue
OPERATING EXPENSES Program Services
Total Operating Expenses
818 Children placed with U.S. adoptive
H olt I nt e r n at i on a l / S pr i ng 2 0 0 9
families
2008 expenses 10%
11% 79%
Program Services Fundraising Management & General
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34,295 Children served
through all programs
2 0 0 8
717 Children placed with adoptive families of their birth country
10,561
(not including U.S. domestic placements)
Families served in all
countries (U.S. families not included)
40,931 Total accumulated number of children placed by
Holt with U.S. adoptive families, 1956–2008
5,376 Children helped to have permanent, loving families
through adoption and birth family preservation
218 Waiting children placed with adoptive families
Perspectives
on
Ethiopia
Holt board members discuss their experiences in Ethiopia and how Holt is helping orphaned children and families have hope for a better future
A Window to the Past The children in Addis Ababa and the Durame intake center help Will Dantzler remember his childhood in Korea
H olt I nt e r n at i on a l / S pr i ng 2 0 0 9
By Will Dantzler, Chairman of Holt’s Board of Directors
1IPUPT GSPN MFGU UP SJHIU t )PMU $IBJSNBO 8JMM Dantzler, found a very personal connection with the children of Ethiopia. He and seven others from the Holt Board of Directors and staff visited Holt’s projects JO "EEJT "CBCB BOE TPVUIFSO &UIJPQJB t 8JMM XJUI a group of children who will benefit from the medical care made available from the newly-opened Holt Shinshicho Clinic near Durame. A Korean adoptee with a mixed heritage, Will discovered that his ancestry may IBWF SPPUT JO &UIJPQJB t )PMU #PBSE .FNCFST #FDDB Brandt, Julie Banta, and Claire Noland hold children in DBSF BU UIF %VSBNF JOUBLF DFOUFS t +VMJF #BOUB BMPOH with other members of the Holt Ethiopia travel team, visit a family considered the “poorest of the poor� by a committee of the Durame community. Team members delivered clothes and gained an understanding of Holt’s efforts to enable birth families to provide a healthy, nurturing environment for their children.
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Something happened to me as I hugged and kissed the children at Holt’s Durame intake center in Ethiopia. Walls that had shielded me from dwelling on my beginnings began to crumble, and windows to my past began to open as I saw a reflection of myself in this generation of orphans. As most of the group began leaving the center, I found myself openly crying as I felt the loneliness of these children without a family—buried feelings that I knew once all too well were now surfacing again. I loved seeing the children that came out to greet us at the Durame Center ,and I just had to hug every one of them because of the connection I felt with my little brethren. The conditions and environ-
ment were the same as I vaguely remembered from fifty years ago‌the only difference was the country. As a Korean War adoptee with no information regarding my birth, I always assumed that my biological father was an American GI. During this trip, I learned that Ethiopia, as the only independent African country, had sent soldiers to the Korean War as part of the UN coalition. This new information had implications of my biological father being Ethiopian. Quite an enlightening discovery and one that made me think even more about my unknown beginnings in life. As we visited the remote areas, the windows to my past continued to open up as we went over terrain not unlike the war torn streets of Korea, and I saw many children running alongside our vehicles and gathering around us once we got out. I then remembered running alongside people on bicycles fifty years ago under similar conditions.
After witnessing the hardships of the mothers in rural Ethiopia, I have acknowledged my birth mother for the first time ever, recognizing now the painful process she must have gone through to let me go and somehow hope that I would get an opportunity at a better life. It is a new awareness in my circle of life, and I am a better person for it. I will always remember Ethiopia for awakening the memories of a past I thought was long forgotten, and I thank God for his revival of those memories in Ethiopia.
So many abandoned children deserve an opportunity to have a loving family just as
Hope for Families a Half a World Away Julie Banta describes how Holt and generous supporters are helping families in Ethiopia through the Family Preservation program By Julie Banta Late last February I stood before hundreds of people, young and old, at Holt’s Texas Tea and Silent Auction, a fundraiser benefiting the children of Ethiopia. I felt enlivened and enthused, having just returned from Ethiopia, brimming with firsthand knowledge of a young program. Just two weeks earlier in a remote, densely, wooded region in southern Ethiopia, a team of seven, having traveled over cratered roads carved by flooding rains, arrived at a village tucked into the lush green of the mountains.
We approached a hovel of sticks and mud occupied by a family, named “the poorest of the poor” by a committee of the community. A family consisting of a father sick with malaria; a mother, thin with malnutrition; and four children in various stages of the ravages of starvation. Dr. Fikru brought the oldest son before us explaining the dead, whiteness of his blind eyes as caused by vitamin A deprivation. Even in the midst of abject poverty and suffering there is hope as this family is being helped by Holt’s Family Preservation program. We discussed the immediate and longterm needs for this family, the first of many families who will receive assistance from Holt and have hope for a brighter future. A future that includes incomegenerating activities that lead to improved living conditions and self-sustainability, as well as desperately needed medical
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Holt I nt e r n at ion a l .or g
As we met Holt staff in both Addis Ababa and Durame, I found the Ethiopian people to be gracious, humble, very engaging and appreciative. I was also very impressed with Country Director, Dr. Fikru, and the entire Holt staff for how well they have continued Holt’s mission with limited resources as the needs of so many orphans is great and increases daily.
my generation of adoptees received. We must do our utmost to see that Ethiopian children get that same opportunity.
care and school fees that will lead to education and the fulfillment of youthful potential. That evening we brought hope, not just in the form of clean clothes replacing shreds of cloth, but also in the caring support the community showers on this family in partnership with Holt and Sponsors a half a world away. Hope comes from people like us seeing and understanding the pictures painted by need, hunger, and loneliness and then generously reaching out to make a difference.
The Children: Infants through school age Most are healthy and within normal ranges for development. Some children with medical conditions or special needs are available through Holt’s Waiting Child Program. We especially need families for boys and children 2 years and older
At the Texas Tea and Auction I looked at the faces representing three continents and comprising stories that could fill a vast volume, all bound together by the name "Holt". Each and every life at the event for Ethiopia had been in one way or another touched by Holt International Children’s Services.
The Adoption Process:
This moment was inspiring, but what I found humbling was the generosity of heart and giving towards the dreams yet to be fulfilled for the children and families a world away.
Shorter for waiting children
Capable, Caring Hands
The loving, compassionate Holt-Ethiopia staff care for children with expertise and warmth
H olt I nt e r n at i on a l / S pr i ng 2 0 0 9
Adopting a Child from Ethiopia
Quick, relatively uncomplicated Generally 12-18 months from approved application to child placement One of Holt’s least expensive programs, even with travel to Ethiopia Both parents must travel to receive their child, and stay approximately one week to complete processing.
By Becca Brandt
Start Here:
As a physician and a mother of eight, I am always especially in tune with the care of children. This was my third trip to Ethiopia for Holt, and I have seen tremendous growth in the program under the excellent guidance of the country director, Dr. Fikru. He is a kind and caring Christian man who truly cares about the plight of the children, and is known and respected in Addis and in the South where he grew up. He is an ophthalmologist, but has an excellent knowledge of general medicine, which has been instrumental in the care of the children. Holt is truly blessed to have him in charge of our beloved children.
Apply online at holtinternational.org/adoption For more information on adopting from Ethiopia contact Stephanie at stephanieg@holtinternational.org
Dr. Fikru has a talented and warm staff who carry out the details of adoption and the humanitarian project of the South. I have been so impressed with the loving care the nannies give. The babies are cuddled and talked to, bottles are never propped and baths are given every day. The toddlers are happy and clean, well-behaved and curious. I entered a classroom in Addis where 2–5-year-olds were being taught the alphabet and numbers in a fun and supportive way. I am quite confident that the nannies make the care center a warm and loving place for the children while they wait for their forever parents.
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Photos from left to right: Dr. Becca Brandt, also a member of the Holt Board, holds children in Addis Ababa and the Durame intake center. As a physician, Becca provided insight into the priorities for Holt’s efforts to improve the health of children in the area BSPVOE %VSBNF t #FDDB DPOTVMUT XJUI )PMU &UIJPQJB $PVOUSZ %JSFDUPS %S 'JLSV BCPVU the health of a child at the Durame intake center..
[2]
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&RIDGE
[5]
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[8] [7] [6]
[9]
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[1] [2]
Michael, 5, Manna, 3 (India), Ade line McKay,4, —Saint Paris, OH Lucy, 7, Mar y, 5 (Both from Chin a), Nathan Theama, 6 —Cedarburg, WI [3] Bindiya, 5 (India)—King spor t, TN [4] Widmaer, 6 (Haiti), with sister Camille Sunshine, 10,— Irmo, S.C. [5] Brigette, 3, Brianna Wix ted, 6, (Both from China)—Fork ed River, N.J. [6]
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Holt I nt e r n at ion a l .or g
Timothy Hoekstra, 18 (Vietnam ), with sister Anne Anthony, 26—Ripon, CA [7] Sisters Bella, 7 (Inner Mon golia), and Sofi David, 4 (China)— San Luis Obispo, CA [8] Julie Lian Kelleman, 3 (China)—Portland, OR [9] Marcus, 3 (Guatemala) , with Mother, Toni Acevedo —E ugene, OR [10] T eres a Casey, 7 (Ind ia)— Columbus, OH Mail original color prints to: Holt P.O. Box 2880, Eugene, OR 9740 International magazine 2 or upload digital photos at holtinternational.org/submiss ions
from the family Meant to be a Big Sister
Big sister, Sophie , and Sadie at Yosemite Falls last summer.
Sophie adjusts to her new role after mom and dad bring home a little sister from Thailand
After adopting our daughter, Sophie, from Thailand, my husband and I knew she was meant to be a big sister. She had “baby radar” and could spot babies across a crowded grocery store, airport or park. She shepherded visiting toddlers around with a hand on their backs, cooing and soothing imaginary wounds. “Such a nurturer”, others would say, and we had to agree. We relished the undeniable charm and immediate, fierce love she wielded, and asked ourselves if we would have the energy or the luck a second time around. We spent a year vacillating between, “We have it so good…why throw a wild card into the mix? and “How can we let Sophie grow up an ‘only’ when she has so much to offer a sibling?” Finally, we set our sights on our second adoption. After a long wait we were matched with Sadie, and while visiting family at Christmas, we shared photos and celebrated her first birthday in her absence. Shortly after, we learned of the tsunami that had devastated islands in southern Thailand and Malaysia, and though we knew our little one was safe, our hearts went out to the many children affected by the storm.
H olt I nt e r n at i on a l / S pr i ng 2 0 0 9
We expected to wait even longer, and the lag seemed interminable. Sophie stopped telling random strangers “I have a baby sister in Thailand!” It all seemed like a receding dream, softening around the edges. To keep Sadie in the forefront of our minds, we showed pictures to everyone we met and talked with Sophie about how Sadie was waiting for us, and how she was going to look up to her, as her new, big sister. We received word that our case would be up for review, and we would need to appear in person within two weeks. With little notice, we traveled back to Thailand, leaving 4-year-old Sophie at home with Grandma. In Thailand we mused at what Sophie would think of her new sister, and eager to unite our family, we set out for the long trip back. Upon our arrival home, Sophie was pensive and awestruck. Hugs and our exclamations at her incredible growth spurt dur-
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ing our two and a half week absence didn't ignite the chatter and bubbly personality we had so missed. To her, we had changed as well. For a heart wrenching week or more, Sophie refused to have anything to do with Sadie emotionally. “When is Sadie going back to Thailand?” she asked my husband and me one day. We laughed gently, but she was serious. “Honey, remember how we talked about Sadie, and how she needed a forever family? She’s here now with us, forever. Just like when you came—she's here to stay.” Sophie thought about this and carried on, stoically. We made sure Sophie got her usual Mommy and Daddy routines. She was allowed to help with some things that Sadie couldn't, and she learned quickly how valuable her help was when it came to changing diapers or watching out for Sadie. “Sadie isn't old enough to do that—aren't we lucky to have a big kid, and isn't Sadie lucky to have a big sister?” Sophie took this as work, and she was up for the task. She wasn't, however, emotionally charged by the experience, as we had hoped. We saw Sophie’s attitude change when we took her new sister to Sophie’s preschool for a visit. We would enter the play yard or the classroom and one of the other kids would see us arrive and shout “Sophie’s SISTER‘S HERE!” I would pick Sadie up and remind them “Let’s give her some space, she’s a little nervous,” and Sophie quickly began to take on the protective big sister role. “She’s MY SISTER – give her some space!” She would say loudly. A firm bond developed. Sadie adored Sophie, and imitated her every gesture and sound. At ages 8 and 5, they still play together and miss each other when they are apart. I cannot count the times we have walked in the door after school, and they have turned to each other to say, “You want to go play?” Then they are off, playing dress-up or horses and teaming up with almost any task. Double the work? Sometimes. Double the love? Many more times over.
Dawn J. Moyer-Schumaker |
Corvallis, Oregon
Finding Grace A woman discovers the ‘grace’ and hope she had been missing, after adopting a little girl from China
When I was a little girl I wanted to grow up, get married and have three or four children. A pretty simple plan really. Four years after Troy and I married I got pregnant and was sick every day. When I was fourteen weeks along I wasn’t sick for two days in a row and we learned I had lost the baby. We sat in a fertility clinic and were told we had a ten percent chance of having children. At lunch afterward Troy said: “It’s okay. Now we can adopt.” I shook my head. “We’ll never be able to say, ‘Oh look, she’s got your eyes and my nose,’ or ‘he looks just like my mother’s baby picture.’” “But we’ll never notice that our kids don’t look like us,” he said. I nodded but couldn’t agree with him. I was certain that every time I looked at my child I’d know he or she wasn’t really mine. We went through one infertility treatment after another, and several friends along the way offered the same advice. “You know, you can always adopt.” Actually, I heard this a lot. My internal rumblings were always the same: Really? Thank you so much. I NEVER knew that. At the grocery checkout one afternoon, I noticed a man in the line next to me. A small Asian girl was in his grocery cart and he was playing with her. I watched as the toddler reached for
him and smushed his face between her tiny hands. “She doesn’t know,” I thought. “She doesn’t know he doesn’t look like her.” That image stayed with me long after I had unpacked my groceries. Reading the Psalms one morning, I came across a verse in the 113th chapter that says: God “settles the barren woman in her home as the happy mother of children.” I turned the book upside down looking for the word ‘biological’, but it wasn’t there. It said the barren woman would be the happy mother of children. Period. At that moment I knew that Troy and I were supposed to be adoptive parents, just like Joseph and Mary. Not bad company to be in. From that instant, I never viewed adoption as our plan B or a last ditch effort to have children. I never saw it as second rate or that I was somehow less of a woman because I couldn’t carry children. I saw it then as I see it today… as my destiny of grace. I never fully comprehended what grace was or the power it has to change our lives until I was an adult. I write about this journey to grace in Finding Grace. If I hadn’t discovered this incredible gift I may never have become a mother. I didn’t get children the way I planned. As a matter of fact, none of my dreams have turned out the way I planned but as my children romp through our home and climb into our bed in the wee hours of the morning I’m grateful they didn’t.
Donna VanLiere |
Franklin, Tennessee
Above: Grace Left: The VanLiere Family, Donna, Troy, Grace, David and Kate
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Holt I nt e r n at ion a l .or g
Donna VanLiere is a New York Times and USA bestselling author. Visit her on the web at: www.donnavanliere.com You can also read more about Donna's adoption journey in her book Finding Grace.
from the family The Gifts Keep Coming A mother and grandmother reflects on her growing family after receiving her sons from Korea 35 years ago
H olt I nt e r n at i on a l / S pr i ng 2 0 0 9
Above: Elizabeth Dwyer sits surrounded by her loving family, 2008. Sons Adam and Jason with their wives Christina and Jennifer, and grandchildren Maria, Morgan and Charlie Right: Elizabeth and Gary Dwyer with sons Adam and Jason in 1978
Gary and I got the call in February 1974 that our-eight and nine-
They were all so tiny and perfect. As I listened to the rest of
year-old sons were coming home. We had moved to our two-
the world sleeping, I cherished their peaceful little faces, totally
bedroom apartment a few months before in anticipation of the
contented, smiling sometimes, and I could see what my sons had
birth brothers’ arrival.
looked like as babies.
The day of their flight Gary and I awoke from a fitful sleep filled
Shortly after Morgan was born, Gary was diagnosed with brain
with anticipation of holding the hands of our little boys for the
cancer, and we were unable to travel.
first time.
months old, her Momma and Daddy came to our house. I will
The flight was right on time. We saw a Korean woman walking
never forget opening the door and seeing her for the first time. I
with the 13-year-old girl who was going to her family in Nebraska.
reached my arms out, and she came to me as if she had known me
Her “new” big brother had been a soldier in Korea and convinced
forever! We then placed her on her papa’s lap so he could hold her,
his parents that he and his younger brother needed a little sister.
and we took lots of pictures! What treasures those pictures have
Here she was.
become for all of us. Gary died four months later.
Our sons were next. Adam was first. Jason was right behind.
Every three months or so, I board an airplane and visit my sons
For me, the hardest thing was to refrain from wrapping my arms
and their families. At various times in their young lives, I believe
around my sons as I loved to do with my nieces and nephews. But
my grandchildren have thought that I live at the airport.
that wouldn’t work. Our boys had never seen us before and must
What a thrill to get off the plane and hear the melodic pitch of
have been so scared. Instead, when I saw them I started to cry.
“Hi, Grandma Dwyer” or “Gammaw Dyer” depending on their age,
“I’m crying because I’m happy,” I said to them.
Gary quietly
and then to share a big, long hug; or to be greeted with a special
reminded me they could not understand a word said. Our smiles
“Welcome to California” drawing. How wonderful to be loved like
and quiet laughter made us all more at ease. We held our sons’
that!
hands for the first time and walked to the gathering place for all
In the summer we swim and play catch. I love to read to them, but
of us who met our children for the first time that day.
now, one by one, they are starting to read to me. We love to watch
Three days later the boys were playing and acting wonderfully
movies or sleep in a tent, inside or outside of the house. We love
silly when Jason called: “Ommoni, Ommoni.”
to ice skate, especially in the summer. Once a year, we all gather
“He’s calling you Mom, after only three days,” said Gary. Fast forward 34 years— Our sons are now in their 40s, and the gifts just keep coming! They have beautiful, loving wives and babies of their own. Those first moments of holding my grandchildren after their births were some of the most thrilling of my life, especially helping out and getting up for the 2 a.m. feedings.
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When she was three
in one place to enjoy how our family has grown. Many times I think of how it all began. Throughout all those years I have felt the energies, both physical and spiritual, of our big family of loved ones, joined with our sons’ birth parents, watching over us. I expect, with the help of their vigilance, those gifts will be ours for generations to come.
Elizabeth Dwyer |
Bernalillo, New Mexico
adoptees today Confessions of an Adopted Child Observations about growing up as the only adopted child “We wish you weren’t our sister!” I can feel the lava of tears begin to burn and scorch my eyes. I take a deep breath and put all my concentration on not letting the tears flow. How could my brother and sister say that to me? Do they really mean it? Maybe I’m not meant to be in this family. Maybe mom and dad really like them better. “Come on, Aimee, just give me the remote control. We don’t want to watch your dumb show!” My fingers grip even harder on the remote, and I muster up the last spark of courage I have left to tell them, “No.” It’s as if uttering that simple word gives me a sense of power over them, but I still have to face the fact that I am the
about their child’s unique heritage. It really helps an adopted
only adopted child.
child further embrace who they are.
Do you ever wish you could meet your “real mom?” This is
Be open to talking about your child’s adoption. As I was growing
always one of the first things people ask me when they find out
up, the fact that I was adopted was never a surprise, and I think
I’m adopted. I know they mean well and are merely curious, but it
my parents were wise to discuss it with me.
really bothers me. The mom that invested in me and loved me is my real mom. I don’t consider the woman who gave birth to me to be my real mom at all.
I never really understood everything about adoption or what being adopted actually meant, but I always grew up knowing that I was loved, that I belonged and that if I ever had any questions, it was
It’s hard to be the only adopted child. Siblings have a tendency
always an open subject my parents were willing to talk about. I’m
to gang up on each other when they are angry. When my older
not saying every child should know about their adoption from a
brother and I would get mad at my sister, we would tag team and
very young age, but from my experience, knowing took a lot of
try to get her to do things our way. However, when my brother
pressure off of both my parents and me.
and sister would gang up on me, I would get frightened. I felt like it was the non-adopted children versus the only adopted child. I knew we were still a family and they still considered me their sister, but their words still hurt. It’s hard to hear people say I don’t look like my family. When people say to an adopted child they don’t look like the rest of the family, it hurts. Struggling with being adopted was already hard enough for me, and when people added in that I didn’t look like the rest of my family, it was almost as if they were saying I didn’t belong. I just wanted them to look beyond our appearance and
If there is one more thing I could leave you with, it’s the fact that family runs deeper than blood. Family are those who choose to stick things out when the going gets tough, care for you when you are sick or down, love you for who you are, and always seem to be a phone call away. A quote by Charles Dickens’ Nicholas Nickleby truly captures this idea.... “Family need not be defined merely as those with whom they share blood but for those for whom they would give their blood.”
realize that we are a family even if I don’t look exactly like everyone else.
where they came from. My family always respected my heritage and where I came from. My dad was also from the Philippines and could help and teach me about the culture. I learned to be proud of who I was as a person and as a Filipino. I would definitely encourage adoptive parents to be open to teaching and talking
Aimee Gonzaga |
Fullerton, California
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Let the child experience and appreciate his or her heritage and
updates KOREA
HAITI
Molly Holt, the chairperson of Holt Children’s Services of Korea and the third child of Harry and Bertha Holt, was presented with the Royal Order of Merit by the Norwegian King, for her service and dedication to the disabled and orphaned children at Holt’s Ilsan Center in Korea. Molly has been serving the children of Korea for more than 50 years.
Holt Fontana Village is nearing completion of four new cottages. The cottages, scheduled for completion in June, will accommodate approximately 40 new children who come into Holt Fontana’s care. “This will allow us to help more vulnerable kids—kids who are in desperate need. We also have a playground for the kids, and it is just so wonderful. The kids are having fun, and it’s affecting us in a very positive way,” said Holt Haiti Director Mansour Masse. “It’s exciting to see those big smiles on the kid’s faces. You cannot ask for anything better than that.”
ETHIOPIA Holt recently renovated and reopened a healthcare clinic serving a large area near Durame in southern Ethiopia. In January Holt board members, along with representatives from the local and central government, attended the inauguration ceremony for the Holt Shinshicho Clinic. Holt, along with generous donors, provided funding for the renovation work and partial funding for a full-time doctor and 4-5 nurses who will run the clinic which provides medical assistance to 3,000 people a month, most of whom are women and children. Equipment and supplies for the clinic have also been provided, as well as a vehicle that will be utilized for the transportation of supplies, medical staff, and children and families in need of medical assistance.
ROMANIA Final completion of construction of the Parent Resource Center in Constanta is underway and should be finished in late April.
UGANDA Holt needs adoptive parents for children of Uganda. We are now accepting applications from families interested in providing a permanent home to a child from this country. For more information, please contact Stephanie at stephanieg@holtinternational.org or Jennifer Dalton at jenniferd@holtinternational.org
Above: Ribbon-cutting ceremony for the opening of the newly-renovated healthcare clinic in Shinshicho, Ethiopia.
Adoptee Camps Holt Adoptee Camp is an exciting and fun camp that is designed to be relevant to any international and transracial adoptee from 9-16 years of age by focusing on adoption, race, and identity rather than birth culture. We invite you to take a few minutes and explore the camp pages of Holt’s website. On top of a great week of summer camp, you’ll find that Holt Camp’s unique environment is unlike anything else. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact Steve Kalb at stevek@holtinternational.org or call 541.687.2202.
Celebrate Your Mom with a Truly Meaningful Gift Give a Gift to a homeless child, and Holt will send a personalized card honoring your mother or loved one. Here is a significant way to celebrate your mother or someone special in your life. We’ll send a card acknowledging your contribution and honoring your loved one… a thoughtful recognition of the love, devotion and sacrifice of a loving mother. Go online to holtinternational.org/gifts to give a gift today.
Winter Jam Winter Jam 2009 has ended its nine-week long tour and Christian music artists NewSong, tobyMac and others made tremendous strides in gathering help for homeless children through Holt's Child Sponsorship Program. We want to thank the over 4,000 generous Winter Jam attendees who have taken on the commitment to help orphaned, abandoned and vulnerable children to have families of their own. Because of your faithful monthly support, homeless children around the world are receiving the food, shelter, clothing, care and medical treatment they so desperately need. We also express our gratitude to the music artists, and guests including Kim Deardorff and Tony Nolan, for speaking out for these children, and to the volunteers who assisted those answering the call to help a child.
H olt I nt e r n at i on a l / S pr i ng 2 0 0 9
New Holt T-shirts and Sweatshirts FINDING FI FAMN ILIED S ING
FAMILIE
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The newly designed Holt International T-shirts and full-length zip sweatshirts are now available to order online. The shirts are available in children's and adult sizes, and we are now offering a semi-tailored pink T-shirt available for women. The Holt sweatshirts are environmentally friendly, made of organic grown cotton and post consumer polyester. T-shirts are made of 100% cotton. Check online for prices and available sizes. Visit the Holt International store at holtinternational.org/store
Mother’s Day
May 10th! Benefit for Ethiopia Holt’s Colors of Hope dinner and auction to benefit homeless and at-risk children in Ethiopia will be held May 8 at the Valley River Inn in Eugene, OR. See holtinternational.org/events for more information.
Picnics The annual Holt Picnic season has officially begun! Visit our Picnic webpage at holtinternational.org/picnics to find the picnic closest to you. Whether you’re considering adoption, waiting to receive your child, adopted many years ago, or are adopted yourself—Holt’s picnics are for you! See old friends and make new ones while children enjoy fun activities. Bring a friend! For more information, contact Sally at sallyd@holtinternational.org
Send us your Grad Photos Wanted: photos of Holt adoptees who are graduating from high school, college or vocational school for the fall issue of the magazine. For a Graduate submission form, go online to holtinternational.org/gradsubmissions. Deadline is September 1.
neighborhood calendar California
waiting children Adoptive families are needed for these and other children
May 2 | Irvine—Holt Family Picnic at Mason Regional ParkShelter 6 June 13 | San Mateo—Bay Area Holt Family Picnic at Coyote Point Park June 14 | Roseville—Holt Family Picnic at Royer Park
Florida May 16 | Jacksonville—Holt Family Picnic at Children’s Home Society of Florida
Georgia October 11 | Atlanta—Holt Family Picnic at Lutheran Church of the Resurrection, 3:30–6 p.m.
Illinois
& cLhowaien TowHieu i-‐
August 15 | Westmont—Holt Family Picnic at Veterans’ Memorial Park
Neha, jal, & BipKia n
Iowa September 27 | LeGrand—Holt Family Picnic at LeGrand Community Park
Kansas September 26 | Prairie Village—Holt Family Picnic at Harmon Park
Nebraska July 11 | Omaha—Holt Family Picnic at Cooper Memorial Farm
New Jersey August 22 | Lakewood—Holt Family Picnic at Pine Park
Oregon May 8 | Eugene—Colors of Hope benefit, Valley River Inn, contact Monica Wilton at monicaw@holtinternational.org July 18 | Portland—Holt Family Picnic at Cook Park August 1 | Eugene—Holt Family Picnic at Camp Harlow August 15 | Bend—Holt Family Picnic, location TBA
Holt Family Picnics For information or to volunteer at Holt Picnics, contact Sally Dunbar sallyd@holtinternational.org. All picnics 11 a.m.–3 p.m. unless noted otherwise. Go to holtinternational.org/picnics For more info.
Holt Adoptee Camps July 19-23 | Corbett, OR July 26-30 | Ashland, NE
Ricky & Jeffrey
Born: 2 .23.04, 7.16.07 | Haiti This sibling group came into care just last October. Ricky likes to play soccer and expresses himself well. Jeffrey has good motor skills for his age, but his speech is not yet clear. He was malnourished upon admission and had a respiratory infection. Jeffrey enjoys playing with his toys and other children in the village. Brittany’s Hope grant of $7,500 available.
Neha, Kajal, & Bipin
Born: 1.10.00, 8 .23.03, 8 .10.06 | India These three siblings were found at a train station. Neha enjoys school, is a hard worker and often leads the group during activity time at school. Bipin, “the boy with a smiling face,” meets with a speech therapist once a week. Kajal has made good progress in her development since coming into care and is friendly to familiar people. Brittany's Hope grant of $10,000 available.
August 2-6 | Dobbins, CA August 9–13 | Starlight, PA
Click holtinternational.org/photolisting
Hui-chan
R icky r&ey Jeff
Born 5.20.07 | Korea This sweet boy enjoys the one-on-one attention he gets from his foster mother. He was born premature, weighing only 2.84 lbs and having intrauterine growth retardation. In July 2008 he was diagnosed with PraderWilli syndrome. Brittany’s Hope grant of $7,500 available.
Stuart
Born 10.6.00 | S outheast A sia Stuart has lived in the same foster home since 2005 and has adjusted extremely well. He is well liked and performs well in school. Stuart has endured some hardships in his life. He has some developmental delays but is doing well in his monthly speech therapy sessions. He has a good attention span and is gaining self-expression. He might especially enjoy a family with older children, as he is interested in swimming, camping and computers. For more information on adopting these and other waiting children, contact Jessica at jessicap@holtinternational.org or call 541-687-2202.
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For international adoptees 9–13 years old, contact Steve Kalb at Stevek@holtinernational.org
Stuar t
NONPROFIT ORG US POSTAGE PAID BELL, CA PERMIT NO. 75
Post Office Box 2880 E u g e n e O R 974 0 2
Change Service Requested
China  Child  of  Promise  Option Children with minor and correctable conditions are available for an expedited adoption process. s &DQ FXW LQ KDOI WKH WLPH RI WKH VWDQGDUG SURFHVV s (OLJLELOLW\ FULWHULD FDQ EH PRUH IOH[LEOH s %RWK ER\V DQG JLUOV QHHG IDPLOLHV ZLWK D JUHDWHU QHHG RI IDPLOLHV IRU ER\V s &RQWDFW +ROW VWDII WR JHW VWDUWHG RU
Fill out or amend a Holt “Minor/Correctable Conditions Checklist� available online: holtinternational.org/china and return it to Holt International. View photos of children adopted through Holt’s China Child of Promise option at
www.holtinternational.org/china/photos Examples of minor and correctable conditions include: cleft lip/palate, heart issues, orthopedic issues, etc.
It’s now online! Holt’s China Moon newsletter brings you heartwarming stories of families adopting children from China. Go to: holtinternational.org/china/chinamoon