Road UnderstandingChapterPeaceto8. and Forgiving Others
8 Section 1 Understanding Section 2 Forgiveness Section 3 Forgiveness and Peace Section 4 Forgiveness and Peace that Begins with Me Understanding and Forgiving Others Chapter
Overview Forgiveness first requires a heart of understanding. Forgiveness based on understanding can overcome the past, heal the present wounds, and change the future. To forgive, we need to know the exact meaning of forgiveness and distinguish between concepts confused with forgiveness. Furthermore, we must accurately specify the subject, method, and conditions. Understanding and forgiveness are important values of peace that can prevent conflict and war and break the vicious cycle of retaliation. The best examples of establishing peace through understanding and forgiveness in human history provides a clue to resolve the hatred and conflict that is spread in the society we live in today and resolve disputes. Let’s find out the mindset we need to prepare to practice forgiveness, and forgive those who couldn’t. The practice of forgiveness is to heal me and the world.
Before we can forgive one another, we have to understand one another. Emma Goldman (Russian politician, 1869-1940)
What is forgiveness, and how do you do it? It is not easy to decide to forgive someone who has hurt you. Even if you are determined to forgive, you may not be able to forgive in your heart. To forgive, you first need complete understanding. It is difficult to forgive someone without true understanding. So how can we forgive through understanding? Understanding the incident, understanding the perpetrator, and understanding oneself are stepping stones toward forgiveness.
SECTION 01
In any event or incident, there is a perpetrator and a victim. Regardless of the extent of the damage, the victim will feel unfair and divided just because they have been harmed. The perpetrator is a clear criminal act and must be held Section
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1) Types of perpetration
1. Understanding the incident
# What is understanding, and why is it needed?
Understanding1
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accountable. However, it is necessary to examine whether the perpetrator had intentions. Let’s look at the types of harm based on the perpetrator’s intentions.
Second, one commits intentional harm for one’s benefit or a specific purpose, such as fraud, robbery, sexual assault,
One day, after many years, the mother discovered the reason for resentment she couldn’t narrow down in the relationship with her daughter, who was left alone. The mother knew her daughter’s loneliness, but she never intended to cause her pain. As an adult, the daughter found out and understood her mother’s perspective and eventually forgave her.
First, there is accidental or unintentional harm. Let’s understand unintentional harm through the story of a young girl. The girl who lived with her mother has very few memories with her. When the girl wakes up in the morning, her mother is already at work and returns home late in the evening. From an early age, the girl had to learn everything herself. The young girl had a dark and gloomy childhood and had a heart of longing and resentment toward her mother. Did the mother not love the daughter? Did the mother know her daughter’s misery, yet ignore and abandon her? After many years had passed, the young girl as an adult attended the forgiveness program and came to understand her mother’s position. Her mother, who lost her husband in a car accident shortly after giving birth, was determined to protect her newborn daughter until the end despite persuasion from people around her to give up the child and start a new life. Her mother learned to do business to raise her daughter. She had to go to the market very early in the morning to take care of the shop until late at night. These were difficult days, but she overcame the challenges with the determination to protect her daughter.
Thirdly, there is psychopathological harm. The sole purpose is to inflict pain on others to feel the pleasure of inflicting pain at the moment without any reason or purpose. Understanding the difficult lives of the perpetrators that lead up to these psychotic symptoms is helpful for forgiveness. However, strong measures against these perpetrators are also needed to prevent innocent harm.
In Japanese, Ijime means bullying and refers to a form of school violence that became known publicly after the suicide of a male student in Japan in 1986. This student was in his second year of middle school, and he grew distant from his close friends as he progressed in school. Due to his small frame, his classmates forced him to run errands or carry their bags on the way to school. The bullying that started with a classmate then spread to other classes. The harassment ensued, including scribbling on his face with permanent pens, making him dance, putting dead mice in his bag, and making him a wrestling opponent for taller students, etc. As the student victim became more passive, the violent behaviors became crueler. The student who led the bullying stated that the student was dead and staged a mock funeral ceremony. He placed the student’s photo on the blackboard, lit incense, and wrote farewell messages such as, “Fool,” “it’s good that you’re gone”, and “it serves him right”. However, the student victim had to pretend nothing was wrong around people because he
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looting, etc. Furthermore, even if it is not a crime under the law, abusive language and harassment are also considered intentional offenses.
2) Understanding the relationship between being a victim and a perpetrator
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1 org/wiki/中野富士見中https://ja.wikipedia.学 いじめ自殺事件 thought he would receive more severe punishment if he talked to his parents and teachers. The gang violence and bullying continued even after entering third grade, and the student eventually hanged himself in a bathroom at a shopping mall.1) However, the issue with school violence does not end here. At times, the victimized student becomes the perpetrator out of anger and revenge. The student takes revenge on the perpetrator more brutally or expresses anger to weaker students. The intent is to make others experience the same amount of pain and suffering and obtain that much compensation and comfort. Furthermore, it confirms the student that he is stronger and more superior than the opponent as he watches the victim suffer. It is at this moment that the victim becomes the perpetrator. Shakyamuni, the founder of Buddhism, stated regarding the psychology of the human mind, “The grudge you hold on to is like a hot coal that you intend to throw at someone, only you are the one who gets burned.”
There are three common types of reactions by the victims. First, it is to “revenge for an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth,” second is to hold in the anger and suppress it, and thirdly, forgive. Which one is most justified? It is easy to think that revenge is most justifiable, and the thought of wanting revenge itself is not wrong. However, the error occurs when the victim perceives oneself as the “absolute good” and defines the perpetrator as an “absolute evil” that punishing and even murdering the perpetrator is considered justifiable. Therefore, within history, the punishment of perpetrators is often in the name of justice. However, one is not deemed an absolute good simply by having been victimized, and therefore criminal acts such as murder are not justifiable actions.
2. Understanding the perpetrator
In many parts of the world, some cultures exhibit the error of the revenge mentioned above. In East Asia, a saying states that one cannot live under the same sky as the enemy of your parents, monarch, and teachers, and thus, you must take revenge on them until they die. In Italy, Sicily, and the Balkans, there is a culture of vendetta. This culture refers to when one pursues and retaliates against the enemy of one’s relative who received the harm and insults even if it means risking the family’s honor or traveling across the world. The issue lies in that the enemy’s son will also take on his sword to avenge his father. This kind of hostility passed down from generation to generation results in tens of hundreds of casualties, leading to bloody conflicts or wars. What will happen if each other only insists on the justification of retaliation and does not resolve the resentment until the end? Due to constant retaliation and revenge, the conflicts will never cease on Earth. The root of revenge is anger and violence, which are significant obstacles to achieving peace. Peace can only be achieved by breaking the chain of revenge by taking the steps to forgiveness.
On April 20, 1999, a school shooting occurred at a high school in Colorado. Two twelfth-grade students, armed with pistols, semi-automatic rifles, and bombs, broke into the school and fired indiscriminately before committing suicide. Twelve students and one teacher were murdered, and 24 additional people were severely injured. The perpetrators died at the scene, leaving permanent scars on both the victim’s and the perpetrator’s family.
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Seventeen years after this incident, Sue Klebold, the perpetrator’s mother, published a memoir called A Mother’s Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy . Through her autobiography, it was revealed that a cute young boy who loved Legos was in a state of loneliness, despair, and deep depression just before the incident. The perpetrator’s diary contained many contents of love, frustration, and suicide. In her book, the mother expressed her deep regrets, saying she seemed to have overlooked the depth and severity of her son’s suffering. Hence, it is necessary to look at the circumstances under which the perpetrator grew up from multiple angles. Understanding is never meant to justify a crime because nothing can justify such criminal behaviors. Understanding is a step toward forgiveness, not rationalization. Furthermore, the process of understanding is necessary to prevent the same crimes in the future.
The first person we need to understand and forgive is ourselves. We often feel distressed or guilty and blame ourselves for mistakes or failures we have made in the past. We start to hate ourselves during those moments and engage in self-harming behaviors such as drug addiction, self-abuse, avoidance of others, etc. These behaviors can be considered another meaning of violence that does not care for oneself.
In particular, as suicide is a social problem that needs to be solved worldwide, the United Nations and the World Health Organization (WHO) support the establishment and implementation of national suicide prevention strategies.
3. Understanding oneself
Furthermore, the WHO and International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP) established September 10 as World Suicide Prevention Day to remind people of the value of life and as an opportunity to look after one another.
Suicide is caused by a lack of understanding of the dignity of human life and the value of one’s worth. It is the same with killing, throwing your life away by suicide, or harming human life. There is a need for strategies to prevent suicide. However, what is first needed is to love myself. I must accept and understand myself so that I can learn to forgive myself in turn. Dolores Clara Fernández Huerta, a woman leader who led the farmworkers’ rights movement in the 1960s and 1970s, had asked, “If you haven’t forgiven yourself something, how can you forgive others?” One who does not forgive oneself will find it difficult to forgive others, and one who doesn’t love oneself will find it difficult to love others. To understand and forgive others, one must first understand and forgive oneself.
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When you forgive, you in no way change the pastbut you sure do change the future.
Bernard Meltzer (American broadcaster, 1916-1998)
1. Meaning of forgiveness
Forgiveness2 # What
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Not long after being married, a woman discovered that her husband was addicted to gambling and alcohol. Addicted to gambling, the husband squandered all his wife’s money and never came home. To make matters worse, the woman was pregnant. She was so upset about being deceived and marrying him that she divorced her husband. However, she Section is forgiveness, and why do we need it?
There are times when you need to forgive someone who has wronged you. On the other hand, there are times when we have to ask another person for their forgiveness. Like this, forgiveness is for the other person, and at the same time, it is for us. When you forgive, let us find out what you are forgiving, how to forgive, and the conditions for forgiveness.
1) Forgiveness for oneself
could not receive child support and struggled to raise her child on her own. The woman could not trust anyone due to the scars of this incident and could not even meet a new man. She became severely depressed with the thought of no one being as unhappy as her. She poured out her hatred and resentment toward her previous husband to everyone she met, and naturally, her interpersonal relationship grew smaller. Her health also began to deteriorate. Whenever she recalled the painful memories, she felt tightness in her chest with shortness of breath and had to take medicine for high blood pressure. She could never forgive her former husband for ruining her life like this. Then one day, her friend gave her advice. “If you find the source of all your problems to be outside of you, you have no choice but to find a solution outside. That person can’t solve your problems anymore. However, if you find the cause of your problem within your heart, then you can solve the problem.” Shocked by this advice, the woman began to look for a solution and joined the Forgiveness Project. She realized she could recover if she forgave her former husband from her heart. Of course, she could not forgive with a sincere heart from the beginning. The anger and hatred stored up at the bottom of her heart constantly arose. However, after she decided to forgive, she gradually spent less time complaining to others and immersing herself in the wounds of her past. As interpersonal relationships improved, her depression began to improve as well. As the stress caused by resentment and anger decreased, her blood pressure gradually returned to normal, and she felt her body becoming healthier. Above all, she was able to love her child for the first time that she had with her former husband. Through forgiveness, the woman was able to feel herself gradually healing. After finding stability and peace
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Small wounds on the body naturally heal over time, even without treatment, but large wounds must be treated to recover. Likewise, I naturally forget from memory the minor wounds of my heart. However, traumatic events are not easily erased from memory and have a lasting impact on my emotions, choices, and daily life. In such a case, I can only recover when I actively heal the pain and sounds of the past through forgiveness. However, the process of forgiveness is not easy. American author Marianne Williamson, who is well known for being Oprah Winfrey’s spiritual advisor, said, “Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered.” Forgiveness is painful because you have to face the past you want to forget and go through the process of objectively understanding the event that occurred at that time, the perpetrator, and yourself. However, there is a big difference between the results of forgetting and forgiveness. For example, someone who understands and forgives a friend for betraying them can meet new people, trust them, and become friends. However, one
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2) Forgetting and forgiveness
of mind, she could completely forgive her former husband. As in the example above, we feel hurt by many things in life, such as marital conflict, betrayal of a friend, unfair treatment at work, etc. It is not easy to heal the wounds of our hearts, nor is it easy to forgive those who have hurt us. Forgiveness is not merely liberating the perpetrator. The purpose of forgiveness is to heal one’s present self from the wounds of the past. Therefore, even if the other person receives forgiveness, the greatest beneficiary is me.
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American author Stromie Omartian said, “forgiveness doesn’t make the other person right, it makes you free.” Forgiveness reveals more clearly what is wrong. Therefore, even if you forgive someone, you can still hold them legally and ethically responsible for the crime. What changes with forgiveness is not the person’s wrongdoing but your desire for revenge. If forgiveness and justice are understood as complementary rather than antagonistic, forgiveness also helps reduce crime and achieve justice. The Diversion Program is a system for the first-time or minor offenders to receive rehabilitation and education programs rather than criminal punishment, and the key is to educate through forgiveness and warnings. Forgiveness sought in the Diversion Program2) is not “accepting wrongdoing” but “accurately recognizing wrongdoing
who has forgotten without forgiveness will struggle with the hurt and pain of the past whenever one makes new friends. The benefit of forgiveness is telling yourself that the past no longer sways you, and it is because one understands the past events and accepts them as part of one’s life. Furthermore, one who learns how to forgive develops the faith and confidence that one can recover quickly from other kinds of hurt. In short, the result of forgiveness is that you feel like a much stronger person mentally than you were forgiving.
programadolescent-diversion-criminaljustice.ny.gov/knowledgebank.https://
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3) Justice and forgiveness
Sometimes, forgiveness is misunderstood as “acknowledging a crime as right” and therefore there are instances where forgiveness is rejected. However, forgiveness is never an acknowledgment of a crime. Instead, one must identify the other person’s fault to forgive. If the fault is not clearly identified, the object of forgiveness itself becomes unclear.
Josh Billings (American author, 1818–1885)
2. Forgiveness based on understanding
and giving opportunities.” Nassau County, NY, introduced Adolescent Diversion Program for 16 and 17-year-old juvenile offenders from 2012 to 2019. The implementation of the Diversion Program reduced the proportion of cases leading to criminal or juvenile convictions in Nassau County from 14% to 2%. It is not reasonable to view immediate punishment for crimes as the only way to achieve justice. Forgiveness can also be one of many ways to implement a just society. There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.
1) Should we forgive even those who do not repent of their wrongdoing?
Second, it is difficult to forgive when the perpetrators do
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Let us think about how to apply forgiveness when a person repents of their mistakes and asks for forgiveness or does not acknowledge or reflect on their mistake. First, it is easier to forgive when the offender repents and seeks forgiveness. Even if you find out the perpetrator’s actions were erroneous or unintentional, it is easier to forgive because it reduces the psychological damage to the victim. Even if the offense was intentional, the offender’s sincere reflection and apology are helpful for forgiveness because they provide psychological compensations for the harm.
not admit their mistakes and reflect on them. The mindset of not accepting their faults even if their wrongdoing is apparent corresponds to a secondary psychological harm. In addition, the offender’s unreflective attitude raises concerns about the recurrence of crimes and is a factor that makes forgiveness difficult for social safety as well as the individual level. In this case, the best action the victims can take is to punish the perpetrators legally to admit their wrongdoings, but be prepared to forgive the perpetrators repents at any time. The most painful situation is when the perpetrator intentionally harms the victim but does not reflect, and there is no legal punishment for the perpetrator. The psychological pain of the victim at this time is indescribable. Forgiveness, in this case, is a very difficult choice. Even if you forgive, you must proceed with the sole purpose of healing the victim.
It is not easy to distinguish between a criminal act and a criminal because no crime can exist without criminals. However, it is more efficient to understand the two separately regarding crime prevention and elimination. For example, suppose I accidentally got into a car accident while driving in the dark and seriously injured a person. Even though I have never committed a crime prior, what if I am branded as a criminal and treated unfairly in society, work, and school for the rest of my life due to a moment’s mistake? It would make sense to be punished for my crimes, but I would feel that it is unfair for everyone to treat me as a criminal. Therefore, criminal acts should be strictly punished, but people should not be treated as criminals. Let’s think about applying the
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2) Even if the crime is unforgivable, people can be forgiven
In a social climate that equates criminal activity with criminals, it is difficult for others to forgive me for my mistakes or wrongdoing. It will also become a rigid society that does not tolerate even the slightest mistakes of the other party and one that accuses and punishes each other. To create an inclusive society that prevents crime and forgives among its members, one must share the perception that “crimes are strictly punished, but people can be forgiven.”
above scenario to others. First, it is necessary to clarify what the criminal act committed by the other party is, and the scope and the subject of punishment should be limited to the criminal activity of the other party. It should also be made clear that though the other party is a criminal for the criminal act, their entire life is not a criminal’s life.
Let’s learn about how to forgive criminals. Punishment for criminals is imprisonment or receiving a penalty. How can the criminal act itself be punished? Punishments for criminal acts prevent crimes from reoccurring and eliminate crimes, and this is possible through edification. It does not mean that there should be no punishment for criminals. Criminals subject to criminal acts deserve punishment, but crime can only be reduced when accompanied by edification. Most criminals commit crimes because they do not accurately recognize the harm and ramification of their actions. Therefore, if the criminal acknowledges and repents their actions through edification, the criminal will be punished, and the victim will be able to forgive.
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Leo Tolstoy (Russian novelist, 1828-1910)
Let us forgive each other - only then will we live in peace.
Suppose the benefits of forgiveness at the personal level are inner healing and recovery. Then, the benefits at the social level are the restoration of relations between nations and peoples and the establishment of peace. Forgiveness between countries or people requires social agreement among citizens, and therefore it is difficult to carry out only with the individual will. Nevertheless, forgiveness is needed to end conflicts and wars within the global community. Let’s learn about the role of forgiveness and various examples for establishing peace in the world.
# How
SECTION 03
1) Robespierre’s Reign of Terror
In 1789, the French Revolution, which proclaimed freedom, equality, and fraternity, was an important event that changed Section Peace are forgiveness and peace connected?
1. A society without forgiveness
Forgiveness3 and
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3
After the revolution, King Louis XVI and Queen Marie Antoinette d’Autriche were publicly executed, and the moderate reformers, supporters of the constitutional monarchy, lost their place. The French society plunged into chaos when the extremist republican Maximilien Robespierre of the ‘Jacobins’ seized power. Robespierre regarded all who did not conform to his ideals as enemies of the revolution. He executed them by the guillotine and even executed his friend, a revolutionary comrade. He even executed his friend, a revolutionary comrade. During the reign of terror of no tolerance and forgiveness, 300,000 people were arrested, 17,000 were officially executed, and it is estimated that an additional 10,000 were executed. 3) Eventually, the citizens prosecuted Robespierre to the National Assembly, and in 1794 Robespierre himself was executed by the guillotine. Contrary to the expectations for the new world after the revolution, people’s anger against the vested interests manifested in various forms of violence. The social atmosphere
Reign-of-Terrorbritannica.com/event/https://www. the course of human history. Modern democracy began with the French Revolution. Additionally, the declaration of human and civil rights announced during this time (Déclaration des droits de l’Homme et du citoyen) served as a reference for each country’s constitution and the UN’s Universal Declaration of Human Rights. However, the constitutional monarchy and republican system that began with the French Revolution lasted only ten years. In 1799, Napoleon dissolved the parliament by force and proclaimed himself the First Consul, declaring the revolution over. Most French citizens longed for stability after a decade of political turmoil and war. What happened within the ten years after the French Revolution? A distinctive form of politics that appeared at that time was the ‘Reign of Terror.’
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without understanding and forgiveness created by the Reign of Terror gave rise to self-righteousness and other discrimination. In such a situation, neighboring countries waged wars, and France being in a state of extreme unrest, had no choice but to return to a monarchial state. Although it is a short period of 10 years in history, it is a period that demonstrates the importance of social integration through understanding and forgiveness.
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The Manifesto of the Communist Party, published in 1848 by Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels, greatly influenced Russian society. Vladimir Lenin, a leading Russian Marxist, advocated “peace, land, and bread” as the slogan to the working class and led the Bolshevik Revolution in October 1917. After the successful revolution, a decree was issued under the Russian Community Party (the Bolsheviks renamed the Russian Communist Party in early 1918) to realize peace and the demand for land and bread. The reforms of the Communist Party, which consisted of the nationalization of industrial facilities, prohibition of Figure 3-1 October Revolution of 1917
2) The Purges of Lenin and Stalin
After Lenin’s death, Joseph Stalin assumed power as successor and carried out a more brutal purge of opposition.
private commercial activities, and government-led distribution of goods, were initially intended for the benefit and liberation of the working class. However, under the communist regime, the production of agriculture and industry gradually decreased, and the number of people starving to death increased due to the difficult economy. However, Lenin was not tolerant of objections and eliminated forces that showed dissatisfaction with the communist line by force. Eventually, the backlash from the supporters of the emperor, bourgeois liberals, and moderate socialists led to a civil war that killed more than 11 million people in the Soviet Union.
After Stalin exiled Leon Trotsky, Lenin’s comrade, for being his rival, Trotsky was assassinated in Mexico in 1940. For the collectivization of agriculture, Stalin confiscated farmland from the peasants and established a large-scale farm called Kolkhoz. He deported those who opposed him to Siberia and imprisoned them in Gulags, where they were subjected to forced labor or killed. In addition, workers in industrial cities throughout the Soviet Union suffered far more severe oppression and exploitation than workers in capitalist countries. The human rights of the workers were not at all guaranteed, and they were subjected to face harsh working conditions with low wages. Communism that set out to liberate the working class from slavery was transformed into totalitarianism that suppressed the people’s freedom and rights. Stalin ordered a great purge of all oppositions, killed them by the secret police, and deported many to Siberian concentration camps. Between 1930 and 1953, it is estimated that between 1.5 and 1.7 million people of the 18 million sent to concentration camps died there.4)
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4 Healey, Dan (June 1, 2018), Review.AmericaninIllnessALEXOPOULOS.GOLFOandInhumanityStalin'sGulag,TheHistorical
The communistic slogan of “Peace, land, and bread” becomes meaningless in the face of forced oppression, slaughter, exploitation, and concealment. Eventually, the USSR came to its dissolution in December 1991. However, in the former Soviet Union, ideological remnants such as suspicion, mistrust, and intolerance remain, hindering social cohesion and development. Understanding and forgiveness are essential for peace, land, and bread. Now is the time to overcome the painful past and move toward a peaceful future based on mutual understanding and forgiveness.
1) Republic of South Africa: Nelson Mandela’s forgiveness and Eugene de Kock’s apology South Africa’s first black President, Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela, was sentenced to life in prison in 1964 for his civil rights activism and was released in1990. “As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison.” On May 10, 1994, Nelson Mandela was inaugurated as the Republic of South Africa President. Mandela was imprisoned in Robben Island, a prison primarily for political prisoners, and worked in limestone quarries and cold waters plucking seaweed. However, Mandela wanted to let go of his past and forgive after his release. The Anglican Archbishop, Desmond Mpilo Tutu, recalled that time such as this, “Before Nelson Mandela was arrested in 1962, he was an angry, relatively young man. He found the ANC’s military wing. When he was released, he surprised everyone
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2. The impact of personal forgiveness on society
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because he talked about reconciliation and forgiveness, not revenge.” Mandela’s forgiveness deeply moved many South Africans, and reconstruction of the past began by finding truth and forgiving rather than punishment. Afterward, Mandela launched the Truth Reconciliation Commission (TRC) and took the lead in unifying the people and society that have been separated for decades due to apartheid. In 1998, a police assassin named Eugene de Kock attended the TRC. He was a white police officer, nicknamed the “Prime Evil,” who brutally tortured and killed South African human rights activists under the apartheid government. At that place, he confessed to his crimes in detail and apologized. Afterward, he also wrote several letters of apology to the victim’s spouse and family and begged for forgiveness. This story was broadcast nationally and gave other police officers who worked in the apartheid government the courage to join in the investigation of the truth. Eugene de Kock’s reflection and apology played an important role in helping South Africa overcome the pain of its past and move toward a democratic society. The constant interest and compassion of a woman named Pumla Gobodo Madikizela made him reflect. She was the first African woman as a clinical psychologist to serve on the TRC. With the help of her outreached hand, Eugene de Kock was able to look back on his mistake, repent, and ask for sincere forgiveness. Although he was sentenced to 212 years in prison at a 1996 trial, he was recognized for his continued repentance for his crimes and active cooperation with the authorities. Therefore, after 20 years of serving his term, he was released on parole in 2015.
2) Ivory Coast: The appeal of the national football team
The Ivory Coast national team and the people cheered for its miraculous advancement to the World Cup Finals. At this moment, national team captain Didier Yves Drogba Tébily took the microphone before the camera. “Men and women of the Ivory Coast, From the north, south, center, and west, we proved today that all Ivorians can coexist and play together with a shared objective: to qualify for the World Cup. We promised you that the celebration would unite the people. Today, we beg you, please -- on our knees -- forgive. Forgive, forgive. The one country in Africa with so many riches must not descend into war like this. Please, lay down all weapons. Hold elections, organize elections. All will be better.” Following Drogba’s, the Ivory Coast national football team began to sing a phrase that was longing in every heart of the Ivorians. “We want to have fun, so stop firing your guns.” In 2005, Ivory Coast suffered from civil war caused by conflicts between tribes and political forces. Drogba’s speech did not immediately cease the civil war. However, his appeal for forgiveness awakened the people’s hearts longing for peace, and it became an opportunity for both sides to sit at the
On October 8, 2005, both the Ivory Coast national football team and the people were in extreme tension. Cameroon and Ivory Coast, the traditional African powers, were playing against Egypt and Sudan for one ticket to the World Cup Finals. Ivory Coast led Sudan 3–0, but Cameroon and Egypt drew 1–1. At the fourth minute of injury time, Cameroon was awarded a penalty kick. If the penalty kick was successful, the advancement to the finals would go from Ivory Coast to Cameroon. The kick hit the bottom of the right column of the post and a few wide, and Ivory Coast qualified for the finals.
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Since the end of the 19th century, Germany and Belgium, which had colonized Rwanda, recognized the Tutsi as the ruling class, and ethnic conflicts in Rwanda intensified. After independence, a civil war broke out between the two tribes from 1990 to 1993, and in 1994, shortly after the end of the civil war, the hardline Hutu killed the Tutsi and moderate Hutu without difference.
Even though Samputu’s forgiveness was on a personal level, it had a significant societal impact. In 2000, the Belgian Prime Minister officially apologized for the negligence in the genocide at the 6th commemoration anniversary ceremony of the victims of the Rwandan genocide.6) In 2014, the United Nations also apologized for failing to prevent the genocide in
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6
5 The Rwandan genocide refers to the deaths of about 800,000 Tutsi by the Hutu from April to July 1994. This is a huge figure, about 70 percent of the total population of the Tutsi.
negotiating table. And in March 2007, both sides of the civil war sat face to face in Burkina Faso’s capital, Ouagadougou, and signed an political agreement, which ended the civil war.
3) Rwanda: Jean-Paul Samputu’s forgiveness Jean-Paul Samputu, a singer from Rwanda, lost his parents, three brothers, and a sister in the Rwandan genocide in 1994.5) What shocked Samputu the most was that his best Hutu friend, Vincent, had killed his father. He wanted to get revenge on his friend, but he could not find his friend who had run away and thus spent the following nine years indulging in alcohol and drugs. After nine years of what seemed like a living hell, Samputu decided to forgive his friend. “One that day, I suddenly felt totally free. I felt a power that I cannot describe.”
Samputu returned to his home village when he heard that a genocide was being held in Rwanda. Samputu appeared in court and stated that he forgave his friend who killed his father. Samputu was the first Tutsi to forgive the massacre of Hutus publicly. Vincent admitted to committing a horrendous crime against Samputu and asked for forgiveness. Vincent also informed that he was in a situation where he could be accused of being a traitor and killed if he did not kill the person closest to him. At this time, Samputu expressed that he was able to sincerely forgive Vincent, and that a great peace came to his heart.
africa/705402.stmbbc.co.uk/2/hi/http://news.
1) Germany: Constant reflection on Nazi atrocities Germany has continued to apologize for the crimes against humanity, such as the Holocaust during World War II, and reflected on the Nazis’ mistakes. On December 7, 1970, Willy Brandt, former Chancellor of West Germany, fell on his knees in front of a memorial to the victims of the Warsaw Ghetto in Poland to apologize for the Nazi atrocities.9) In 1994, Roman Herzog, former President of Germany, attended a ceremony commemorating the 50th Anniversary of the Warsaw Ghetto
Figure 3-2 Ntrama Church, Rwanda, where 5,000 Tutsi were slaughtered
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Rwanda after 20 years.7) In 2017, Pope Francis admitted that the church had also committed sins during the massacre and apologized. 8) Nevertheless, many Rwandans are still living with the severe scars and pains of that day. To heal the past’s painful history and pass on a country that is not shameful to the future generation, Samputu is still crying out for forgiveness.
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16 murderjailed-over-mass-oskar-groening-auschwitz-guard-world/2015/jul/15/theguardian.com/https://www.
12 rau_2000_eng.pdfeng/doc/speech_gov.il/description/https://knesset. 13
14 nazi-crimes-merkelresponsibility-for-has-everlasting-world/germany-straitstimes.com/https://www.
Road to Peace 30
Germany’s reflection did not end with apologies from politicians. It continues by abolishing the statute of limitation for Nazi war crimes, ongoing court trials, and mandatory education on not repeating the past. In 2015, a 94-yearold Oskar Gröning, who had worked as an accountant in Auschwitz, was given a four-year prison sentence by a German court.16) Schools in Germany are now educating the next generation of its dark past through history textbooks without hiding the atrocities of the Nazis and the Holocaust. In addition to textbooks, school tours to concentration camps are
10 htmlme-22883-story.xpm-1994-08-03-com/archives/la-https://www.latimes.
uprising-8089389anniversary-warsaw-forgiveness-60th-reconciliation-and-radio.cz/https://english.
15 intl/index.htmlforgiveness-grm-poland-ww2-europe/germany-com/2019/09/01/https://edition.cnn.
11 htmlmn-22136-story.xpm-1995-07-09-com/archives/la-https://www.latimes.
Uprising and officially apologized to the citizens of Poland.10)
In 1995, Helmut Josef Michael Kohl, former Chancellor of Germany, visited the Auschwitz concentration camp in Poland and said, “this suffering and death, the pain and tears, force us to remain silent in this place.”11)
In 2000, Johannes Rau, former President, asked for forgiveness for the Holocaust in his speech to the Israeli parliament. 12) In 2004, Gerhard Fritz Kurt Schröder, former Prime Minister, attended the ceremony commemorating the 60th Anniversary of the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising and gave an official apology for the German invasion of Poland.13) In January 2013, Chancellor Angela Dorothea Markel celebrated International Holocaust Remembrance Day. She stated, “Naturally, [Germany has] an everlasting responsibility for the crimes of national-socialism, for the victims of World War II, and above all, for the Holocaust.”14) On September 1, 2019, President Frank-Watler Steinmeier attended the 89th Anniversary of the outbreak of World War II held in Wieluń, Poland, and asked for forgiveness. “I bow to the victims of the attack in Wielun, I pay tribute to the Polish victims of German tyranny and I ask for forgiveness.”15)
also mandatory. In particular, history textbooks are compiled in consultation with Poland and France regarding the parts related to the Nazi era and World War II so that history is not distorted.
Germany’s constant apology and reflection are setting an excellent example for restoring relations with neighboring countries and spreading a culture of peace. Of course, this does not eliminate the historical atrocities of the past, nor do the victims have to forgive. Nevertheless, sincere reflection and introspection to not repeat the wrongful history and genuine apologies accompanied by a solution are not easy even for an individual. Germany’s apologies and forgiveness will be remembered as an excellent example of peace and coexistence on a national level.
3. Forgiveness and Peace 31
Marian Williamson (American author, 1952-present)
The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world.
1) To hate and forgive is dependent on me
Even if we understand the relationship between forgiveness and peace, it is not easy to practice forgiveness within our own lives. Before practicing forgiveness, let us first understand the following four mindsets below and forgive those close to us.
1. The attitude to forgive
Most people suffer from physical and mental damage from unexpected accidents against their will. However, hate and forgiveness depend entirely on you when the situation of harm comes to you. Just because a person asks for forgiveness does not require you to forgive them unconditionally. Furthermore, even if the person does not ask for forgiveness, you can forgive them for yourself. As I am the subject of judgment, hate and forgiveness are dependent on my choice. Peace that Begins with Me we practice
# How can
Section Forgiveness4 and
forgiveness? SECTION 04 334. Forgiveness and Peace that Begins
2) There is neither 100% perpetrator nor 100% victim
Let’s apply the same to the person who offended me. Aren’t we also assuming that the other person’s actions are never mistakes and that they were intentional? Are we not thinking that the person is being rude one-sided since I didn’t do anything wrong to the other person? A tolerant attitude toward oneself and strictness toward others obscures the substantive truth and distorts the other person’s intentions. Forgiveness
3) Do not misunderstand the other person’s intentions
Road to Peace 34
Let’s say I have offended someone. I would not have committed this act for no reason. Perhaps it was a completely unintentional mistake, or maybe I was offended by the rude words and deeds towards me that I repaid the same way. However, because the victim does not know my intentions or situation, they may mistake me for being ill-willed and reckless. How upsetting would I be if the other person is ignorant of my intentions and conditions and undermines my existence only by my visible actions?
There are situations with 100% offender and 100% victim in a single event. However, if you look at a person’s entire life as a whole, a 100% offender and 100% victim situation does not exist. Everyone in their lives causes harm and receives harm from others. If we assume that we create a perfectly fair society, then everyone who offended us must be punished, and we must receive punishment for all the offenses we have caused to others. However, no one can live everyday lives in such a society. Therefore, forgiveness is needed in human society. Because people are both victims and perpetrators simultaneously, they must know how to forgive to receive forgiveness from others.
At times, my good intentions can become a barrier to forgiveness.
4) Clarifying my good intentions
354. Forgiveness and Peace that Begins
can begin when we have a balanced view of truth without misunderstanding other people’s intentions.
For example, a man could not forgive his wife even after the divorce, and it was not simply because of the heartache caused by his wife’s affair. The problem was that the man did not know why he couldn’t forgive his wife and, thus, was unable to meet a new woman. The man had hope in his one purpose, which was: “a happily married life.” The man thought that his wife broke this hope, so it wasn’t easy to forgive her. When it became clear that his intention was not “taking revenge on your cheating wife,” but that it’s about “having a happy married life,” he realized he was wasting too much energy and emotions on unnecessary things. In order to fulfill his purpose, he forgave his former wife and married a new woman. In another example, a woman lost her son in a traffic accident at a crosswalk. The woman thought that she should never forgive the perpetrator because she thought, “severe penalties are needed to prevent reoccurrence of crosswalk traffic accidents.” Eventually, the perpetrator received severe punishment at the trial. However, even if the perpetrator was punished, the number of crosswalk traffic accidents did not decrease, and the wounds of the woman’s heart did not heal. Instead, as the accident of that day came to mind every day, the pain in her heart continued to grow. She remembered that her intention was not to “punish the perpetrator” but to “prevent crosswalk traffic accidents.” Thus, she decided to forgive the perpetrator, and through forgiveness, she escaped from her
the event of hurt and write it down on a piece of paper. Write down specifically the actions of the other person that hurt me and how I felt at that moment.
heartache. Furthermore, to achieve the original purpose of preventing crosswalk traffic accidents, the woman presented various ideas for accident prevention to public offices such as the police stations. As such, no matter how good the intentions are, they can become barriers to forgiveness. Therefore, when my good intentions are made clear, I can finally say that I am ready to forgive.
Road to Peace 36
1. Let’s find out who we can forgive for our health and happiness.2.Let’srecall
6. As we reread Lesson 8, let’s consider the benefits forgiveness brings to ourselves and the people around us. In addition, let’s focus on our good intentions and have a forgiving heart.
2. Forgiving those around you Before forgiving, if we have prepared the four mindsets above, let’s decide on the subject of our forgiveness and practice forgiveness in the following order.
5. Let’s write down the reasons why it is difficult to forgive. Also, consider whether my good intentions have been distorted and are, in fact, blocking forgiveness.
4. Try and write down “understanding the incident,” “understanding the perpetrator,” and “understanding myself” as objectively as possible.
3. Let’s think of positive thought so we don’t get caught up in our negative emotions.
7. If I have the heart to forgive, let’s share what we wrote on the paper with those around us.
Mahatma Gandhi (Indian political leader, 1869-1948)
8. If I am not ready to forgive, let’s focus on healing my heart first, then take my time and try again. Even if you decide to forgive today, resentment may emerge again tomorrow. Even if forgiveness does not happen in a day, there is no need to worry. Forgiveness is an ongoing process, and the final step in forgiveness is to feel the peace and stability of the mind. Attempting to forgive in itself shows that you are already taking the initiative. The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
374. Forgiveness and Peace that Begins
Understanding and forgiveness are the core values of peace and for achieving peace. If various values learned in the previous lessons such as gratitude, consideration, sacrifice play a role in preventing conflict and war, understanding and forgiveness are active solutions to resolve personal and nation wounds and hatred caused by conflicts and wars that have already occurred. The cases of the Republic of South Africa’s efforts of social integration through forgiveness, and Germany’s restoration of relations with neighboring countries through apologies, reflect the potential for peace-building through understanding and forgiveness. To forgive, we must first understand. Deep understanding often naturally leads to forgiveness. If “understanding the incident,” “understanding the perpetrator,” and “understanding oneself” precedes, we can sincerely forgive the other person. However, there are times when the process of forgiveness is as painful as the wounds and want to give up. During these moments, we must remember that forgiveness is entirely for ourselves. Forgiveness is a strong step towards a healthy and peaceful future by healing the wounds of the present caused by events of the past. Forgiveness is not mere oblivion, nor is it an act of absolving the perpetrator. The object
Conclusion
Everyone in the global community wants peace over war. Understanding and forgiveness can break the vicious cycle of constant retaliation. It also has the power to lead a new era of peace. Let us first forgive those around us and put peace into practice. Forgiveness is difficult, but it is a very courageous act. The world will become brighter and brighter with the light of peace even from attempting to forgive, and putting forgiveness into practice will heal us and the world.
of forgiveness is not the crime itself but solely the weak-willed human who committed the crime. In the end, what changes through forgiveness is your inner turmoil, anger, and the desire for revenge.
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