iCandiLand October 2011
g” n i s s f Ki o t r A hat wn w o d “The s is reak ULY b R efah ng T Late od kissi go
Dating On A Budget “I want to show her a good time but my pockets are hurting.”
Secon d Cha What d nces o they m ean to y ou?
Special Inter view with the iCandi Couple of the Month
CONTE NT October 2011
Taste of Candi Articles
16
iCandi Radio Schedule 03 Music Reviews 04 What Would You Do 06 Bucks with Bux 08 The Conscious Corner) 09
Educational & Inspirational You Are Beautiful 10 This Thing We Call Life 19 In Our Angels’ Hands 20 Make A Difference 22 Who Deserves a 2nd Chance 23
Cover Story
14
iCandi Couple of the Month 12, 13, 21
Fun & iCandilicious iCandi Birthdays 11
My Fantasy Men 14 The Art of Kissing 16 ( First Date Fashion 18 Recipes of the Month 23
09
12
iCandi Radio October Schedule Dates
Event
Host
Topic
Time (est)
Oct 2
The Insightful Hour
Brotha Insight & Family
What is A Black Greek?
6–8:00 pm
Oct 3
The Whole D*mn Show
Gryndhousz
WILDCARD SHOW WITH RANDOM TOPICS
6–7:30 pm
Oct 4
Keep it 100
Pastor Vic
Is Hell Real?
8–9:00 pm
Oct 4
New R&B
MsiCandi
New R&B MUSIC (Mainstream & Indie)
9–10:00 pm
Oct 5
Late Night with Lateefah
Lateefah & Bishop
Rules of Courting
11–12:00 am
Oct 6
Talk With Blessings of Beauty
Blessing of Beauty
Vain Men
8–9:00 pm
Oct 7
iCandi After Dark
MsiCandi & The Crew
Here Comes The Bride
10–12:00 am
Oct 9
The Insightful Hour
Brotha Insight & Family
What is the REAL meaning of Holidays?
6–8:00 pm
Oct 10
The Whole D*mn Show
Gryndhousz
WILDCARD SHOW WITH RANDOM TOPICS
6–7:30 pm
Oct 11
Keep it 100
Pastor Vic
What religion is President Obama
8–9:00 pm
Oct 11
New R&B
MsiCandi
New R&B MUSIC (Mainstream & Indie)
9–10:00 pm
Oct 12
Late Night with Lateefah
Lateefah & Bishop
Do People Really Want the Truth?
11–12:00 am
Oct 13
Throwback Thursday
MsiCandi & Go2Gurl
The 90s
8–9:00 pm
Oct 14
iCandi SweetHearts Mixer
PARTY
Oct 16
The Insightful Hour
Oct 17 Oct 18
PARTY
PARTY
PARTY
PARTY!!
Brotha Insight & Family
What Happened to Our Black Leaders?
6–8:00 pm
NO SHOW
NO SHOW
NO SHOW
NO SHOW
Keep it 100
Pastor Vic
Should Healthcare be Mandatory
8–9:00 pm
New R&B
MsiCandi
New R&B MUSIC (Mainstream & Indie)
9–10:00 pm
Oct 19
Late Night with Lateefah
Lateefah & Bishop
What Women Want! (Cracking the Girl Code)
11–12:00 am
Oct 20
Talk With Blessings of Beauty
Blessing of Beauty
Beauty & The Beast
8–9:00 pm
Oct 21
iCandi After Dark
MsiCandi & The Crew
iCandi Barbershop II
10–12:00 am
Oct 23
The Insightful Hour
Brotha Insight & Family
Is Prison Slavery of the 21st Century?
6–8:00 pm
Oct 24
The Whole D*mn Show
Gryndhousz
WILDCARD SHOW WITH RANDOM TOPICS
6–7:30 pm
Oct 25
Keep it 100
Pastor Vic
Should We Get Rid of Social Security
8–9:00 pm
Oct 25
New R&B
MsiCandi
New R&B MUSIC (Mainstream & Indie)
9–10:00 pm
Oct 26
Late Night with Lateefah
Lateefah & Bishop
Trick or Treat (Bedroom Tips & Tricks)
11–12:00 am
Oct 27
Throwback Thursday
MsiCandi & Go2Gurl
70s Funk
8–9:00 pm
Oct 28
iCandi After Dark
MsiCandi & The Crew
iCandi Beautyshop II
10–12:00 am
Oct 30
The Insightful Hour
Brotha Insight & Family
Does Hollywood Portray Blacks Fairly?
6–8:00 pm
Oct 31
NO SHOW
HAPPY HALLOWEEN
TRICK OR TREAT
:-)
J Antoinne’s Music Reviews Jill Scott - Hidden Beach Presents: The Original Jill Scott from the Vault, Vol 1 Hidden Beach Records, 2011 Jill Scott's name is synonymous with good music. Although her last release, The Light of the Sun, wasn't quite what we expected (or wanted), this release is what The Light of the Sun SHOULD have been. Hidden Beach has released some songs that clearly could have made it onto any of Jill's previous albums, that laidback mode of easy listening soul. From the live feel of "Dear Mr. & Mrs. Record Industry" to "Holding On", and even the awesome remake of Bill Withers' "Lovely Day", one can only expect greatness from Jill Scott when she digs into her Philly roots. Hopefully, we can get more of the same in the future. (4.5 Stars)(A)
Latif - Love Life H.U.R.L Records, 2011 (Japan Only release) Latif's debut album, Love In the First, went largely unnoticed, which is a shame, because it's not that bad of an album at all. Here, you can definitely hear a lot of growth vocally from Latif. With some slick production and nice rhythms, this album could fit in with any R&B lover's collection. The first single, "One Kiss" is worth a few spins, as is "Faithful" and "Crazy Love", with its Ne-Yo-esque falsettos and head-bopping beats. The album's true ballad, "Do You Love Me", is probably the best song on the album vocally and production-wise. This album isn't without its missteps, but, overall, it's definitely an album worth listening to. (4 Stars)(B+) ATTENTION ALL R&B MUSIC LOVERS!!! We have moved our show "New R&B" to Tuesday Evenings at 9 pm EST/STD directly following Pastor Vic's Show Keep It 100!!! Be there for some of the hottest new R&B joints from artists that vary from mainstream to independent :-) www.blogtalkradio.com/icandiradio
Committed - Committed Epic Records, 2011 Winners of the latest season of "The Sing-off", these men are known for their awesome a cappella sound, reminiscent of Take 6 or Ladysmith Black Mambazo. Here, they do indeed bring about some awesome arrangements of songs that will make one take listen. They're known for their gospel flair; "Soon Ah Will Be Done" and "It Is Well" both capitalize on that sound. Their remakes of "As" and "Pretty Wings" are practically amazing; however, some of the other songs sound a tad overproduced. Maybe a fully a cappella album would have been too much, but a couple of the songs would have worked better without instrumentation. Nevertheless, it's a solid debut from them. (4 Stars)(B+)
Aaron Deponce - Hereafter New Merge Records, 2011 Deponce (now adding his first name) is a former member of R&B groups A Few Good Men and Next, so he knows his way around an R&B song. That said, this is his third solo release, and it's along the same line as his others; not a huge international smash but still solid in its own right. "I Feel" and "So Beautiful" are well-crafted uptempo tracks that may garner a few spins, and "How Can I" is reminiscent of his old group A Few Good Men's sound, not too bad. However, a couple of songs seem to be formulaic filler, including "Flauntin'" and the remake of Stevie Wonder's "All I Do"; if you're going to remake it, do it correctly. Still, not too bad of an album. (3.5 Stars)(C+)
Don’t Miss This CDs you probably don't have (but SHOULD) Christina Aguilera - Stripped Arguably her best work, this album is naked, raw, and real...and worth every single listen. And then another one.
4Shades - 4Shades This quartet was seriously overlooked but released an amazing album of ballads that are definitely worth listening to.
What Would You Do..... if you found out your man/woman was taking food & household items from your house to take to another woman/man house they were messing with on the side? Find Out What Team iCandi Answers Were..... MsiCandi
I would go to the dollar store and buy some generic stuff (cleaning stuff, supplies cookies, snacks, etc) take it home place the items nicely in a basket with a bow and a note on it that reads "Take this to her and STOP using my good s*it"!!!
iWill
I will buy everything from the dollar store and say, "here take these things to your broke b*tch house and I will be over Sunday for dinner".........
Rai Li
Do you have to ask me that question?? I think we all know what I would do!!!! hahahaha #PrayWontHappenTillAfterTheF uneral lmbo
@kjhinshaw Id leave it sit out, go bad and put it back in the fridge spoiled Antoninette Mackey: I would put some laxative in they food cause he was full of shit he needed it out lmao Jamal brown : As long as it ain't my furniture tv Wii and studio equipment I don't give a darn lol AL Crawford : I would talk to her and let her have it then after that I would break up with her!! Phatt Phat Porter: WOW! What I'd do I am not for sure...but what I will say is this....Lord have mercy on his soul..... Because after I finished with him, she can have him, the bills, kids, dogs, house keeping, laundry and all the baggage all of it...I'd be OUT!
@CB_4REAL Did she pay for it with cash or stamps @robhatcher lol lol I'm single so I don't have that problem lol @TaneeTheTO he wouldn't be my man after I found out obviously he has another situation to tend to @JayceMiguel get her some food stamps and have her exit stage left @loretta1130 get him/her some special chocolate for desert..LOL n hide the toilet paper @iluvbooksnmusic Put him out, with my foot!
Shanae Love: Poison the food! Lol Darryl Walker: Join they ass for dinner since its your food. #ainthavinit# Michelle Little: I would put something in the food so their asses can get sick. And dump his stupid ass. Priscilla Rose: I would make their a$$e$ wear that ish(the food)!!! Then I would use the cleaning products to throw in their eyes(BLEACH N AMMONIA)!!! Now live happily ever after cause I'm out!!! JOHN LEGEND PRESENTS... GRYNDHOUSZ ' TROUBLED MAN� Featuring Mainstream Artist Kanye West & Indie Artists From Across the World A portion of the album proceed go to the Make A Wish Foundation so go cop it now at http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/gryndhousz
Dear iCandi,
Dear iCandi, If you are cool with an ex, is it okay to invite them to your events??? (Cincinnati) Why not? I’m cool with a few of my exes and they support me and all that I do. I really think it depends on the relationships; the one with your ex and any new relationships that you may have. Once you become involved with someone new or vice versa, the new person might not be comfortable with your friendship. I’ve run into that a couple times in my life. Back then, I would put distance in my friendship with an ex to please my new boo. Honestly now I wouldn’t. I really think good friends are hard to come by and a couple of my exes have proven themselves to be really good friends. We just weren’t meant to be. Now if you are talking about that one ex (the one that got away where in the back of your mind you still have hope for a second chance), my advice would be if you’re single, sure invite them you never know! But, if you are attached...nah, don’t do it. It might ruin the event. ~MsiCandi~
Bucks with Bux by Meghan “Bux” Williams
Dating on A Budget
Everyone likes to go out and have a nice time with that special someone. However, it doesn’t have to break your budget in the process. You can plan that special date with him/her and not break your pockets. Keep in mind that with a little creativity anything is possible in these hard economic times. Some people may frown upon this, but every now and then you can have a lunch date. Same great food but at a cheaper price for those places that have a lunch menu. One of my favorites is staying in and cooking for your date. By cooking at home you are able to eat and drink cheaper and have a more intimate moment by simply just staying in. Last but not least, check out your area’s free events. I love reading Metromix for Cincinnati; it’s a lot of really nice and adventurous things to do there. You can see if Metromix is in your area (www.metromix.com) or check your local event guide. Keep in mind that special date with someone doesn’t have to break you; just let your mind wander and the rest will follow.
R E N R O C S U IO C S N O C E H T A Second Chance is A Blessing Written by Brotha Insight & Reese Second chances are very worthwhile and necessary in society. You can have a second chance on love, on your job, going back to school to get your high school diploma or college degree. A second chance is a second chance no matter how you view or put it into perspective. Often we get caught up in the notion or idea that we can no longer continue or pick up where we left off, thinking “it didn’t work the first time so it’s not for me.” This can even take place in a relationship. You may not control the reason you ended the relationship but you took something from the situation and learned from it, ultimately growing into a better person and allowing you to help others to not make the same mistake in the future. We really need to recognize that everything is a lesson in life. Second chances are absolutely AMAZING; you have to look at what is happening. You are given another chance to make something successful and this time you are ahead of the game because you have experienced it. You have lived through the bumps in the road, and this time you know exactly when it’s time to slow down and roll slowly over the speed bump so you don’t tear anything up. That is what second chances are about. For example, if you have been blessed with an opportunity to continue your education, how wonderful is it for you to go into a building and know you need four hours a week to study, not the one hour you gave the first time. Maybe you should try another teacher, or a different time of the day works better for you; morning classes just weren’t getting it for you, either way you are armed with the knowledge and know how to approach the situation successfully. Second chances are gifts that some people never have or take the time to pursue. Many times we forget that life is already planned out for us but often we aren’t ready to handle certain issues, obstacles etc., so things are set for you to gain experience and come back around when it’s your time.
If you are given a second chance on love and you really messed up the first relationship, you now have the tools to know how to treat the other person and avoid the same mistakes. Maybe you always were complaining and it was too much for your significant other, or maybe you were very selfish all the time, etc. Whatever the case you now have insight into what YOU want out of a relationship and signs to help tell you if you are with the right person or not. If it’s a long lost love and you have that opportunity to love each other again, you are now ready to communicate properly and appreciate the love you once lost. Having dated others you know for sure what love is and if what you have is real or not, and mainly if you are ready for love. One of the most beautiful things is being able to be reconnected with your soul mate; it’s a very special and rare opportunity. I ask that you take the time and review your life to see what is missing, what to improve, and how to make it happen. Second chances are not often given and if one is presented to you, you have just been blessed with an opportunity to become better than you were before. We all have the power to make a difference; we have to become the difference to see the change. Step outside your box and don’t think of your first time as a failure but rather a way to prepare you for your greatness. Second Chance is a tool for future success; don’t miss out on yours. You don’t have to wait for it to come to you, it’s just as good if you seek out your own Second Chance.
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL Written by: God's Elect Lady
How many times have we as women walked around saying that we are not beautiful? It can be because we are bloated, hair isn't done, makeup not on, or even for the mommies-to-be, it seems the belly has taken over your life already. These are all worldly things that come in and make us feel this way when truth be told, we are always beautiful. Even on your worst day you are beautiful. When one begins to look down on themselves, this is an attack of the enemy. Let's face it; the more he can get us down, the bigger he feels. So he covers us like a thick layer of smoke and we begin to choke. We choke about how beautiful we are, we choke about how gifted we are, we choke about our parenting skills, we even choke about our destiny! Ladies, this must come to a halt quickly! When you begin to realize that these feelings have come over you, immediately snap out of it and pray the enemy up out your space! He DOES NOT belong there at all!! Stop allowing your self-esteem to be taunted by material and worldly views on how we are supposed to look and act and feel. We have emotions, and that's what separates us from men. Now I am not saying they don't have emotions, but they don't wear them on their sleeves like we do. Being emotional is okay, but do not allow it to consume you and take over you! Stop behaving as a two year old and be about your grown woman. I know sometimes this is hard, but that's why God sends others in your life to help you through it. God never brings you to a thing NOT to bring you THROUGH a thing. So the next time you are feeling down and out because of materialistic things and looks, you look in the mirror and you tell yourself that you are a KING's kids, you are victorious, beautiful, and virtuous! Be Blessed
today e to you who you m o c e w ing Father just be rgive you for you would fo irit g in k n t p a s h tha t t h g ig askin war are and sins and rene w we have r o us of ou us. Lord I kn t today we bu , u within o begin y d e shall ointe disapp eclare that w lives. Of r ou and d ence in elp because decree h a differ r e u k o a y m ou d to ill nee thank Y w d e r w o e L l, . y u s if a t cours e u a bea d isn't the roa ing within me next time I at he for cre n and t nt, gently s woma re virtuou ling any diffe . I love You e e f a I m a ho m e you, just me of w or remind orship and ad love You I w d I r , o e, s L u Jes ll You, ! In Jesus nam e t o t t ! ! g wan in h t an any !! more th Amen!
To Read More of God's Elect Lady’s work, check out her blog http://dawnofday11.blogspot.com
Happy Birthday to our October Candi Canes Michelle Little 3 Mayo Woody Oct 6 Avery Davis 9 Lynncoyia Bradley 11 Queen Mother Holiness 12 Brandi Pope 12 Nina Beauvais 14 Alison Davis 14 Latoya Evans 16 Kiana Brown 20th Clarices Sims 22 DeJaun Sherman 23
Trina Banks 24 Susan Ward 24 Kevin Badford 26 David Haboush 27 Neish Allsmiles 27 Peachy Lowry 27 Courtney Hairston 28 Irv Straun 29 Kenmar Brunner 29 Ashley Jackson 29 Rai Li 30
iCandi Fab of The Month LaLa Vasquez Anthony The REAL “Basketball Wife”. Shaunie, Jennifer, & Evelyn ain’t got nothing on LaLa. She’s a wife, a mother, an actress, TV personality, and reality TV star. Kudos to LaLa and her Vh1 Show “LaLa’s Full Court Life”. She’s showing these woman what a REAL Basketball Wife looks like.
@CharmyBz 11
iCandi Couple of the Month As you all know, I am a hopeless romantic and I believe in second chances and fairy tales. Lately all I hear is “he cheated” or “she’s full of drama”. I watch my friends (as well as my own) personal relationships fall apart. I see couples who I idolized growing up get divorced; it’s really sad and it’s put a damper in my fairy tale dream. I’ve recently been inspired; if you guys are fans of our iCandi Radio shows you should already know Mayo and his beautiful wife (Our first official Facebook top model for 2010) Kiara. This couple gives me hope that fairy tales can happen and they also have me believing in second chances. Let’s go in deep and find out more about their story.
Mayo & Kiara Woody MsiCandi: How did the two of you meet? (K) We met at 5/3rd Bank, where we both worked. I called him my "work buddy". (Laughs) (M) Kiara was trying to play hard to get; she called me her “Work Buddy.” I used to buy her an apple cranberry juice every day at work. She would flirt with me and stuff but she would never go any further, talking about she had a boyfriend (not while you over here smiling in my face everyday…). So one day I decided that I was not going to go to her desk anymore. So the second day of my strike she came over and started talking to me, asking me if I was still her “Work Buddy”. I told her that I didn’t want to be her Work Buddy anymore. So I asked her out and we started talking.
MsiCandi: Was it love at first sight? (K) It wasn't love at first sight for me; all the ladies wanted him. He was a very attractive young man. (M) It was more like lust at first sight. (Laughs) I remember looking down the hall and seeing her walk with them bowed legs and that nice round booty. I called my supervisor over and asked her who she was. My supervisor told me her name was Kiara, I said to her “I am going to get her.”
Go2Gurl: How long did you date before you got married (the first time around)? (M) Whatever Kiara says… (Laughs) (K) We dated for about seven or eight months before we got married.
MsiCandi: What made you (Mayo) decide that this is the one? This is who I want to marry? (M) Well, we just clicked. We had a lot of the same goals and she seemed like someone who I could actually build something with. Plus, I loved the way she looked and a few other things had me hooked. (Laughs) I was on my way to the Navy and I wanted to be married, just in case I died, I would have someone to leave everything to.
Go2Gurl: (Mayo) Has Kiara always been a Diva? (M) Yes Lord…and she is training 4 little girls to be the same way. I love it!
MsiCandi: What was the process like when it came to blending a family? I don’t like using the word “step-parent” but what was that process like? (M) Because Kiara and I were already married by the time my daughter was born it was really easy. As she grew we let her decide what she wanted to call Kiara. She ended up calling Kiara, “Mommy Kiara.” I never cared for the term “step-mother” either. The challenge came when my daughter’s mother found out what she was calling Kiara, but after a lot of communication she understood that our daughter was around a house full of children who called Kiara mother and it was natural that she would want to call her the same. So to try to compromise we taught her to say Mommy Kiara instead of just Mommy.
MsiCandi: You guys are like the “Huxtables”! How did the break up affect the kids? (M) We tried to keep things together for the kids. Of course they noticed a change but we exercised the art of communication. Communication, I must say was the key. When they didn’t understand things we took time to explain it. We didn’t always wait for them to ask us questions. We asked them how they felt about things. Soon it was an open conversation in our house. We did all the birthdays together, we went on vacations together; we tried to keep things together for the kids. It was not always easy but we managed to put our personal feelings aside. Did I mention that it was not easy!!!
Go2Gurl: How long were you apart? How did you both feel about being separated from each other? (K) We were separated for about two years. It was hard at first seeing him or hearing about things he would do with other females. But after while you tried to move on and live your life, but in the back of your head still thinking about that person.
Go2Gurl: Adopting children, how did that come about? Was it a mutual decision? (K) I'll let Mayo answer this question.... (M) I use to work for a foster care agency and I just could not help myself. To see a child in need and being able to supply that need I had to. We started out as foster parents and later decided to adopt our children. Was it a mutual decision? Ummmm…at the end of the day, yes.
MsiCandi: I hear that Mayo used to be a T.R.I.P. How did you deal with that (Kiara)?
(M) At first it was scary. I had been with her for so long and we had a family. I did not know what to expect. I knew I was going to miss her though. Looking back, the freedom that I experienced was not worth the time I missed with her.
MsiCandi: (Mayo) How did it feel to see Kiara dating other men? (M) I mean it wasn’t my favorite thing. But I have always been the type of man that if it’s good for me to do then it’s good for you to do. Kiara was very respectful. If I didn’t want to see it she would make sure that I didn’t see it. And I would do the same thing for her. Plus I always knew that it was still mine anyway so it didn’t really matter who she dated I could still get it! (Laughs)
(M) MsiCandi, don’t start nothing. (K) (clears throat) Well, as you can see we are back together and strong as ever. Every man/woman has their moment where they get the BIG HEAD and want to explore other options, but as we grow up and know what it is that we want, we come back to reality. (Laughs) We both had our lessons learned.
Go2Gurl: Why did you break up originally? (K) Irreconcilable differences. (Laughs) (M) Well…Kiara just couldn’t get her life together, sike naw just kidding. I will take the blame for that. I wanted my cake and I wanted to eat it too. I loved cake! (Laughs) All kinds of cake, yellow cake, chocolate cake, spice cake… (Laughs) I was a mess… (K) We both had growing up to do. We were young when we got married and started a family.
MsiCandi: What was it like being a single father while you were dating? (Mayo) Did you have to deal with any drama? (M) I didn’t have very much drama. My rule was never to date a girl who did not have kids. I applied this rule after dating a woman who had no kids. She decided that she was going to come over while my children were home and was not going to leave and I had to call the police to help her leave. But other than that nothing…
Go2Gurl: What brought you back together? (K) It's funny, because we've always said we would get back together in the future. We gave ourselves ten years, church family gave us two years, and what do you know, PRAYER works. (M) Honestly, we grew up. We figured out what was most important -- family and happiness -- and we realized that we could do everything that we were doing together and make it better. We started being honest with ourselves and admitted that we loved each other and we needed to set an example to our children. We wanted them to have both of us at their disposals.
MsiCandi: I was able to witness the second time around and y’all weren't playing. When did the light bulb go off in your heads that “I need to stop playing games and make this happen FOR REAL”!? (M) When I thought about the fact that someone as special and sweet and sexy as she is, couldn’t possibly stay on the market too long. If I didn’t get her and make her the wife that she was meant to be, someone would. And honestly I could not imagine someone really having her and her not being mine anymore. {Continued on page 21}
My Top Fantasy “Movie” Men Written By MsiCandi Darius Lovehall (Lorenz Tate) If you have actually seen the movie “Love Jones” then no explanation is needed. To those that haven’t, I’m sending you three virtual iCandi beat downs. Watch this movie ASAP (as a matter of fact it’s currently on demand and on Netflix). Darius was a poet who was working on his first book. He stole my heart during the very beginning of the movie when he dedicated a poem to Nina Mosley. The line that got me was “Right now I’m the blues in your left thigh, trying to become the funk in your right”! That just sounds good. Game recognizes game. Call me Darius! (Love Jones)
Lance Sullivan (Morris Chestnut) There is something very sexy and alluring about a man that loves the Lord. This playboy/football player is about to marry the love of his life. Some dark secrets come out and he’s really close to calling the wedding off. If you haven’t seen this movie, SHAME ON YOU! I won’t even spoil it but look at the picture. He let God lead him down the aisle. Very powerful moment. (Best Man)
Jason (Allen Payne) Jason’s character meets the beautiful Lyric and he courts her (something that women these days know nothing about). The most romantic scene is their picnic in the park. Not only does he plan a romantic picnic for her, afterwards he washes her feet in the lake. YES I SAID IT, HE WASHES HER FEET! I love a man that isn’t scared to pamper a woman by rubbing her feet. A man that will massage the toes is alright with me! (Jason’s Lyric)
Winston (Taye Diggs) Sexy chocolate Jamaican sensation! Yes Lawd! Chocolate, Jamaican accent, abs for days, young “Tender Roni” that knew how to grind on the dance floor. All I know is if I am still single in my 40s I’m planning a trip to Jamaica to find myself a Winston! (How Stella Got Her Groove Back)
Quincy McCall (Omar Epps) Omar Omar Omar!! You did that! There is something special about your very first love. The first boy you’ve kissed, held hands with, the first one that you let...well you know what I’m talking about. Watching Quincy & Monica’s relationship blossom was definitely a treat. Through their ups and downs you got to see how true loves never dies and his line at the end of the movie “Double or Nothing” gave me goosebumps!! (Love & Basketball)
Lucky (TuPac Shakur) If you rocked with TuPac back in his prime then you saw this movie. It was definitely a hood love story. Lucky was a single father working at the post office trying to make it. His character had that “bad boy” swag that a lot of ladies can’t resist. I know I usually say I don’t do thugs but I would have taken Lucky any day...dirty nails and all! (Poetic Justice)
Orlando (Shemar Moore) Although I was VERY upset with Tyler Perry for putting my boo Shemar Moore in those funky cornrow braids, you couldn’t help but fall in love with the character. God fearing, hardworking, dedicated, & a provider. His character was the complete package and when he told Helen “I want to be your knight in shining armor. All you have to do is wake up, I’ll take it from there.” Every woman in the theater on opening night screamed in unison. Yes that man definitely deserved a spot on this list. (Diary of A Mad Black Woman)
Scott McKnight (Common) Scott is the true definition of a sweetheart. Although he had his gullible moments in the movie he was a true gentleman that (like myself) was a hopeless romantic. His character had me dreaming up my fairy tale story. (Just Wright)
I know I’m not the only movie lover that lusts after the occasional leading movie man. LADIES: email me and tell me who your fantasy men are (iCandipro@gmail.com) ~MsiCandi~
g n i s s i K f o t r A e h T fah by Latee
In the words of Betty Everett, “If you want to know if he loves you so, it’s in his kiss.” In life you can fake a lot of things, but you can’t fake the passion that comes from a sincere kiss. Kissing is the most intimate part of sex, even more than the actual act of having sex. If the kiss is bad then everything beyond that will surely fall apart. If sex happens without kissing there is a total disconnect of emotion. Kissing is what establishes whether or not you’re really making love. A bad kiss will surely make you memorable for all the wrong reasons. Women want to be swept away in ecstasy, not distracted by whether or not a man is gouging his tongue down her throat or slobbering down her face; and sometimes a man wants to take the lead for you to follow. With all that being said here are some things that can take a kiss from mediocre to absolutely earthshaking.
Make sure you check out “Late Night with Lateefah” Wed nights @ 11pm (EST) on iCandi Radio www.blogtalkradio.com/icandiradio
Ragland
The Tips: Excellent dental health Ladies and Gents it is so important to see your dentist, because there is nothing worse than kissing someone with rotten teeth. Brush, floss, rinse, and nothing’s wrong with buying and using a tongue scrubber. Keep your Altoids and gum at the ready. Soft Succulent Lips Ladies keep that lip gloss popping. Find a gloss that makes those lips look edible and has a hint of a fragrance and/or taste. This will have four of the five of his senses going crazy. Fellas don’t be afraid to apply some Carmex and keep those lips in tip top shape. No one likes chapped lips. Now that we’ve got the essentials together, let’s work on technique:
Eye Contact Subtle glances are all you need. You don’t want to gaze into the eyes of your love, like a deer in the headlights. It is okay to occasionally look into the eyes, because the eyes are windows to the soul, but anything more than that is just creepy. Sexy Sounds Now let’s involve the Fifth sense. The right kind of sounds can turn up the heat by volumes, but the wrong sounds can turn your spouse totally off. No smacking or slurping. the sounds that naturally come along with kissing and some moaning here and there are more than enough. Don’t ruin a kiss by adding your own soundtrack. Bringing the Hands Along for the Ride Ladies rub his head, caress his face, or grab him invitingly. Lightly use your fingernails, tracing up and down his arms, back, or chest. You are using your nails to tease him, not to mark him. Fellas grab the back of her head, gently run your fingers through and grasp her hair, and wrap your arms around her. Grab her face and pull her in firmly, yet tenderly.
The Finishing Touches: Don’t get so lost in your kiss that you forget to swallow. Your kiss should be juicy not sloppy. Fellas, no throat stabbing with the tongue. Use the tongue wisely, but if you have your entire tongue down her throat you’re doing too much. Come hither motions with your tongue, slightly deep into your partner’s mouth and then pull back. Gentle nibbling of the lips. Softly suck the bottom or top lip into your mouth and nibble and pull back. Then go back into your kiss. This is a nice switch, but don’t overdo it. Don’t try this with both lips at the same time. Ice Cream Kisses Have fun with your kisses. Use fruit, ice cream, sherbet, whipped cream, and remember the earlier section about swallowing as it applies here too. The Build This kisses should build like the crescendo in a symphony, slowly and steadily increasing in intensity and depth. Customize Your Kiss Remember that no two people are alike so you have to decipher what your partner likes the most, picking and choosing the best techniques for your spouse.
Kissing is already a very erotic and personal act. It closely exposes us to the pheromones of our mate. Pheromones help us to enjoy sex more. This is why kissing usually happens before and during sex. Combining what you’ve learned here with what nature has already given you, your man or woman will have a little piece of heaven on earth with just one kiss.
Fashion with Lady R.E.D. I know itʼs been a minute but Iʼm back with how to dress to impress on a first date. For a date in a warm weather climate, the yellow and white dress paired with heels or flat sandals is perfect because itʼs flirty without being revealing. Since we are approaching fall another option would be this brown faux wrap dress paired with some cute nude or tan ankle boots; sophisticated but still fun. As we roll into winter another option would be a striped tunic sweater, leggings, knee high boots, and a cute leather jacket. All of these outfits can be paired with chunky bracelets, hoop earrings, and a necklace of some sort. I hope these suggestions help you on your night out on the town with your future boo. Happy shopping and as always, ttyl...
FALL FASHION “LACE” It’s no big news that lace is hella sexy. But this fall it becomes polished, too More Fashion Tips from: www.glamour.com
HOT MESS
“The Epitome of a BAD Mother” I often hear stories of “deadbeat dad’s” (we all know a few) but after reading these stories, These ladies make a dead beat dad look like a saint! HORRIBLE parenting. Some people shouldN’t be allowed to conceive children. I just got mad! Mother tries to sell son for $2000 Mother Gambles away son’s cancer treatment money Mom charged with feeding baby yayo lacked milk Mother arrested for shooting her 4 & 5 year olds with a shot gun
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. Mohandas Gandhi
This Thing We Call Life Written by Lashanna Dipiano Each day starts anew with new grace and mercies. The blessing of life is full of chances to get it right, to love the way you are supposed to, to forgive others, to live your destiny and to enjoy the life in its entire splendor. In life we often find ourselves lost and caught up in technology, work, bills, children, and the lives that we are supposed to be enjoying. Our days are clouded with emotions that often control our actions, leaving us in a vicious cycle of pleasure and pain. Our peace of mind has been compromised and we have forgotten what it feels like to simply live or live simply. Taking the time to consider the blessing of our daily second chance is a practice that we all must take part in to gain the peace of mind and happiness of this life. Second chances manifest in many shapes and forms in our lives, but it is the ability to discern and accept them that leads us to a place of growth and peace. We have to be willing to accept our trials and tribulations for what they are – second chances with great opportunity to expand ourselves into a being that is able to learn without feeling at fault, love without condition, and forgive without resistance. Second chances are our opportunity to show others around us that our character is better than the circumstance and that our faith is bigger than the mountain before us. I encourage everyone to take a moment to be still and take in the world around you. Remind yourself where you have come from and where you want to go. Know that there is no greater power than what is within you and you have the ability to take today by the wings and make this chance count. Live boldly, love freely, laugh constantly, pray often, and give constant thanks for the chance to get it right, to love the way you are supposed to, to forgive others, and to live your destiny!
In Our Angels’ Hands WE ARE PRAYING FOR YOU Thomas Chapman (The Legend) Carlos Jeff & Family Berdie Lewsis “Sista Mama” The Barnes Family Karen Daniels Toria & Family Kevin “Kdaddy” Hicks Joanne Williams Nevaeh Mccoy Phyllis Evans & Family Jose Aldanondo Robin Smith Ann Smith Lillian Smith Alicia Hearing & Family Matt & Michael Thompson Tila Frost & Family Holly Carrigg & Family Jane Boyles Jennie Mathis Zahbria Thomson Junita Bonner
Prayer Requests
If you are in need or you know someone in need of Prayer email us at icandipro@gmail.com We will add the name to next month’s e-newsletter. Blessings to you all! ~MsiCandi~
iCandi Angels R.I.P. In Loving memory of EstherBarnes William & “Candy” King Kandace Pyles Brycee & Cameron Jeff JP James Romano Anna Brown Jerome Swanson James “Jellybean” House Patricia Kirkland Scott Burrows Sr. John Bruce Gilmore Jr. LeRoy Morgan Earic Early Nadene McGowan Reshaud Jackson James Revels Jr. Sally Rowland Jannie Tubbs
iCandi Couple of The Month Mayo & Kiara Woody Interview Continued....... Go2Gurl: What do you feel are the characteristics to make a family work? (K) God, Communication, Friendship, Reliability, Humor and Affection.
(M) Putting God first and understanding how he ordained marriage to be. Also you have to have love, determination and compassion. You have to be strong enough to stand your ground but wise enough to know when to give in.
MsiCandi: What do you feel that you are doing differently as a husband/wife than you were doing the last time? (M) As for me I had to learn how to be the man that God wanted me to be. I knew that if I could be the man that God wanted me to be I could be more than the man she needed me to be.
Go2Gurl: What would you say are your lessons learned? (M) I learned that everything that look good to you is not necessarily good for you.
MsiCandi: Before we let you guys go, you guys have a new little bundle of joy in the house. What do you think baby Logan will add to your family and your relationship in general? (M) Logan is here and he is PERFECT! It is such a blessing for us to have him. I think he adds more hope and motivation. I say hope because for something so beautiful it reminds me that everything in this world is not bad. He helps me look forward to tomorrow. And I am extra motivated each day to do more so that I can provide for my family and show them the love and attention that they deserve.
E E LOV V O L we n see s. a c u o As y he Woody our second t LOVE ulations on y gs and baby d in t Congra , new beginn icially adopte !! chance We have off iCandi Family Logan. odys to the S!! (lol) o the W UP COUSIN WHAT ndi~ ~MsiCa
MAKE A DIFFERENCE What’s going on with the younger generation? Often times we are talking about how disrespectful they are and how “fast” they are. We see young boys and girls going to jail for violence or drugs. It’s a very sad time and it hurts my heart to see these things. While growing up I had an excellent village behind me. Not only were my parents there, but I had my grandparents, my aunts & uncles, godparents, my older cousins, my neighbors, my friend’s parents, and mentors. It’s time we get back to those days and become a village again. So I pose this question to you: WHAT AE YOU DOING TO HELP THE YOUNGER GENERATION? I’m not talking about your own children or nieces or nephews. I mean your neighbor’s kids, or your co-worker’s son? It’s time we ALL step up and begin to make a difference. The number of single parent households has increased so much that it’s now considered normal. As a single mother I can tell you this: WE NEED HELP! So step up and make a difference! Become a mentor. Start showing our youth that there are other ways to become successful than selling drugs. Teach our youth how to deal with a situation without using violence to get the message across. We at iCandi Productions have made it our own personal mission to join to ACTS OF LOVE CAMPAIGN and I would really love for you all to become a part of this movement. “Acts of Love” is a strategic
campaign, committed to inspiring
over 1,000,000 people to extend
love in the form of kind acts to marginalized youth, ages 3-19 all across the world.
For more information & to become apart of this campaign go to: www.millionactsoflove.org I’m big on ACTIONS! So instead of complaining about the younger generations let’s get out there and MAKE A DIFFERENCE! Our babies are depending on you! Love you all ~MsiCandi
Not Everyone Deser ves A Second Chance Written by Mayo Woody
When we consider giving some one a second chance we should consider every fight, every spoken word, every broken promise, every time he/she didn’t come home at night, or when they didn’t answer the phone or respond to text messages. We should take these things into account; not to throw it up in their face but to critically think your way through the process, to see if you are emotionally able to handle being disappointed if things don’t turn out the way we hope. You have to gather all of the emotions that you ever felt concerning that person. You need to decide if this person deserves your time, your love, your consideration, your compassion or your second chance. Because it is yours, it is your life that you are sharing and you should be the one who decide who you want to spend it with and if the person in question is worthy.
Some may disagree with me but second chances should not be as plentiful as they sometimes are. We find ourselves giving second chances to people who don’t deserve them; we do this over and over again, passing out second chances like benefits of doubt. A benefit of a doubt has nothing to do with the worthiness of the person who receives the benefit. This is something that you get for simply being a human being on the behalf of another human being, considering that they really have no real way of knowing the truth. We normally don’t need any facts or proof in order to offer a benefit of a doubt. In other words if you want to give something away for free it should be a benefit of a doubt, not a second chance. This has always puzzled me. I am all about giving people a second chance. But is there an appropriate cut off for a person who seems to abuse your generosity? How many times do you extend a second chance to a person? I mean, I know it’s called a second chance which means two not 3, 4, 5 or 10. The reason why I ask this is because there are people who are on YOUR 5th second chance and nothing has changed. They still lie to you, you still get sent to voicemail more than you get an answer, and they blame you for their shortcomings. You are constantly told that “you are too insecure”, “you have trust issues”, and “you need to get some friends,” or even “I went out last night and had a few too many drinks and passed out at my friends house, that’s why I didn’t come home” and the most popular one of all, “You trippin’!”
Bottom line, second chances are not cheap or easy to come by and they should be valued accordingly. If you find yourself in a situation where you have extended several second chances to a person and they are still taking advantage of you, consider this bit of advice and give yourself a second chance. I know you have been told that you will never find anyone else. The only person who can make that true is you. The only way you will never find anyone else is if you stay with the person who does not appreciate you. If you can give someone so undeserving a 2nd, 3rd, 4th chance why can’t you extend that same courtesy to yourself? Prove to yourself that you are important to you. Make yourself available to someone who will appreciate and respect you. Look for someone who hurts when you hurt and someone who you can draw strength from in your weakest moments. Find someone who you can share all your faults with and still love you for the person you are. When you find this, you have found yourself something! I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this and May God Bless Ya Life!
Recipes of The Month By: MsiCandi
Usually I go the healthy route but I’ve been a little FAT lately and I don’t care. A while ago I came across http:// www.copykat.com and they have all the recipes to our favorite restaurants so although I have yet to master these in particular, I wanted to show you a few of my favorite dishes that I am determined to master!!
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PLACES TO BE
Golden Corral’s Bread Pudding (OMG I LOVE THIS)
Chipotle Mexican Grill (Now this looks complicated)
Boston Market’s Cornbread (reminds me of my great grandma’s cornbread)
If you live in Cincinnati (or surrounding areas) it’s going down! Our first event was so successful that we decided to give you more Candi! I will be in town and if you know me, I love to have a good time. So meet me at Bottoms Up Tavern on October 14th. Can’t wait to see you!