I NNER L IGHT M INISTRIES NEWSLETTER VOLUME 11 NUMBER 4
DECEMBER, 2000
DO WE NEED WHY TEACHERS? by Jim Gordon, President of ILM
I
was looking through my baby book recently and found a section called “First Words.” As I read some of the first words and statements I had made, I came across this entry by my mother: “Why do we need teachers? Age 37 months.” After I had finished looking at my baby book and had put it away, I found this question running through my mind, over and over. I began to wonder what my mom had told me in response. I had no idea as to what her response was, but there was something inside me that wanted to hear an answer to the question. So I went inside in meditation and began to answer the question for myself. I envisioned myself as the little boy in the baby book photos, and saw the little boy ask the question, “Why do we need teachers?” Sitting there in meditation, I began to feel a great sense of responsibility come over me, and I knew that it was important that I answer the question with careful thought and attention. I felt I did not want to just say something to ‘quiet the child’. Then I found myself move into a place of not knowing what to answer. What is a good answer? What is the right answer? I found myself moving into a place of not wanting to say anything in response because I felt that I did not know the ‘right’ answer. I remained in this mental space for some time, looking at what was happening inside me as I searched for the right answer. Suddenly, I realized that this is sometimes what I do in my daily life. When I am confronted with something in my life, a question, a situation, or a problem, I find myself looking for the right answer, the true response to what is present, and I find myself waiting and waiting and waiting for
that right answer. I may see a dozen different solutions and I may hear from others good insights to the situation, and still I do nothing until I find or hear the ‘right’ answer. I looked over my life, and I began to see situations where I had waited and waited for the right answer, and in waiting I did nothing because I did not want to do anything but the ‘right’ thing, have the ‘right’ solution. I saw where opportunities had come and gone in my life because I did not move on them — I was waiting for, you guessed it, the right answer. Still in meditation, I found myself going into self-judgment for having handled my life in this way, and so I began to forgive myself for how I had handled these situations. And in the process of the forgiveness I remembered what one of my teachers had once told me was the answer, the ‘right’ answer, to all questions. “Follow the loving. Let the action of following the loving be the answer and you will be doing the right answer, the right action. From this place of loving action you then can make choices and changes as needed.” Okay, I got it. Loving action, not fearful inaction, is always the answer. So, back to the original question, Why do we need teachers? The answer came: “Teachers give us the tools with which to find the answers in life and to be able to be open, receptive, and to be willing to take action, to change and grow. Teachers help us to trust in ourselves and others, to listen and evaluate ideas and situations, and to continually move forward by trial and error to the solution that best works for us in the moment. A teacher helps us to see that life is the teacher and experience is the learning.” In other words, teachers help us to keep taking loving action.
I N GOD’S TIME! by Laura Kesten-Beaver, ILM Minister
movie theater, but then I realized it was a church. An old man with a long white beard, wearing a very old robe, appeared onto what looked like a stage. He pointed to three flat stones which were standing upright on a long stone table, and although he didn’t say anything out loud, I understood his message perfectly. I remember thinking, “Oh, now I understand.” Words which told the story of the Holy Grail were chiseled on these three flat stones. He then walked over to a very large wooden door on the right, maybe 15 feet high, and opened it. I hadn’t noticed the door before and I remembered thinking in my dream, “Oh, that’s where the door is.” The light poured in not only from the opened door but from somewhere above as well, and I could see the dust on the beam. And then, one by one, great mystics and spiritual teachers began to walk through the door in single file. I gasped and began to cry as I recognized some of them as they walked past me, teachers from this and other lifetimes. The amount of love that poured into the room and filled my heart was tremendous and I never wanted it to stop. The old man smiled. He seemed pleased and said, “You see, these are all the ones who came with Joseph of Arimethea in bringing the Holy Grail, the Chalice, here to Glastonbury. It wasn’t just Joseph who came.” He smiled again. I bathed in the light and the love and I wanted to hold onto it forever and never be without it. But I felt it slipping away, and just as they came in one by one, they left, all too quickly, and I began to wake back into my physical body. I woke to myself crying — crying in the remembering of such great love. When I fully awoke, I knew I had been to Glastonbury in my dream, and it became clear to me that what I wanted to experience while visiting England was now being given to me. It was also clear I wasn’t supposed to ‘get it’ while we were in England. Perhaps Spirit felt that Disneyland — the world of illusion — was a more fitting place. Nevertheless, most importantly, I learned that when I don’t understand something or don’t have an experience at the time, to be patient and know that the answers, information, teachings, and experiences are not given to me in my time but are always given in God’s time.
T
his past July, the ILM staff took a trip to England. I hoped for something spiritually grand to happen while we were there. I personally wanted to experience a great revelation. But what I got was a ‘big nothing’ — at least at the time I did. What I was given later was far greater than I could have ever expected, or imagined, and I received this gift in God’s time — not my time. This story begins on our visit to Glastonbury — the traditional hiding place of the Holy Grail, and burial place of King Arthur. It is also one of the two centers of the Catholic Church in England before Henry the 8th had it razed for not recognizing his divorce and the formation of the church of England. Jim gathered us around and began talking about the historical and spiritual history of Glastonbury. As I listened, I couldn’t understand a single word he was saying. It was as if he were speaking a foreign language. Internally I laughed and thought, “This is peculiar.” I found myself watching this peculiar scenario with great interest, but soon began to feel removed and disconnected from the group, and from being at this site. As we continued our visit through Glastonbury, I began to think maybe there was something wrong with me; while everyone else in our group shared how they felt this place was special, I felt like I wasn’t ‘getting it.’ I felt I had missed something. That was until. . . Two weeks after we returned from our England trip, my family and I took another trip — to Disneyland, where we rendezvoused with our daughter’s girlfriend from Hawaii and her family. On the second day in Disneyland, I woke with a terrible headache which developed into a migraine. My body ached terribly and I was nauseous with every move. So while everyone else went on to the park, I lied on the bed and soon fell asleep. While I slept that afternoon, I had an incredible dream. I found myself at a place in which I had been before but could not yet identify. There were rows and rows of seats. At first I thought I was in a 2
I NNER L IGHT M INISTRIES
CALENDAR C LASSES & P ROGRAMS : J ANUARY - A PRIL , 2001 P RESENTED
BY J IM G ORDON : For additional information, call Laura Kesten at 512-894-0992
W
EEKLY
CLASSES:
Jim’s weekly Austin class is held Tuesdays 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm,
ILM Center, Franklin Sq. Bldg., 3724 Jefferson, Ste. 100, Austin, TX.
Each class includes spiritual teaching, practical exercises, group discussion, and meditation. Jim helps participants to become more deeply in touch with the Spirit within.
WORKING WITH SPIRIT IN RELATIONSHIPS with ILM Ministers: Jim Gordon and Brian Yeakey DATE: Friday, January 26 - Saturday, January 27, 2001 TIME: 7:00 PM - 10:00 PM FRIDAY 9:00 AM - 6:00 PM SATURDAY PLACE: ILM Center, 3724 Jefferson, Suite100 COST: $25 A wonderful way to prepare for the loving Spirit of Saint Valentines Day! This workshop will focus on working with Spirit in creating greater intimacy in all of our relationships, including those with ourselves and with God. We will explore how to effectively communicate with ourselves, others and God so that we can more fully experience the Peace, Loving, and Joy of Spirit. For further information call Brian at 512-306-1056.
NEW TAPE
F ocusing On Christ
from A new tape by Jim Gordon
NEW TAPE
In this seminar Jim talks about one’s relationship with the Christ and the symbolisms around the birth of Jesus the Christ. The seminar concludes with a meditation. To Order: This tape is $8.95 (Please include $3 per order for shipping and handling.) Checks may be made payable to Inner Light Ministries and sent to: Inner Light Ministries, P.O. Box 164332, Austin, Texas 78716-4332. Please include your name, address and phone number. Allow 4-6 weeks for delivery. 3
(This pullout ILM Calendar continues on pages 4 and 5.)
I NNER L IGHT M INISTRIES CALENDAR PRESENTED BY LAURA KESTEN: For additional information, call Laura Kesten at 512-894-0992
T HE
U
THE
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NFOLDING CREATIVE SPIRIT: This workshop is an uplifting, experiential workshop designed to awaken and embrace the inner and outer creative self. Using art as a medium, we offer a variety of experiences as a means to enhance this process of liberation. This type of workshop is not about being an artist, or whether you believe you are creative or not. It is about opening ourselves to the creative possibilities that are inherent within us all, and learning to listen with a “new mind and heart” to the positive and negative judgments we tell ourselves about our own creative potential. Please join us for an enlightening day with our Unfolding Creative Spirit. February 10 Sat. 9 am - 5 pm ILM Center $25 RITER WITHIN: Writing is a tool. It is yet another path to self-discovery and personal healing. It can be a way to find our heart, our truth, and our voice. In The Writer Within workshop, we focus on the heart. Thoughts and feelings of the heart often unfold in bits and pieces so, here in this workshop, we give our hearts permission to liberate itself from the critic and the editor, who live inside us judging our work and delighting in corrections. Through the new freedom of our unfolding hearts, our truth emerges. A safe and intimate environment is created for both the writer and sharer. Sharing what we write is always optional. February 17 Sat. 9 am - 5 pm ILM Center $15
OMEN’S “PAMPER” WEEKEND: This is a weekend for “pampering” at the beautiful Alma W de Mujer Retreat Center. Included in this weekend: one 30 minute massage, one 30 minute Reiki session,
a foot massage from a Sharper Image machine, a footbath, a session on a “chi-machine,” and lots more. We’ll learn ways to support our minds and bodies through aromatherapy, vitamins and herbs, selfmassage, meditation, and humor. We will also participate in a really cool body movement session. And ladies — we cannot forget the facials!!! All activities are at your option. Sound too great to be true? It’s not! So come and join us on this wonderfully supportive, relaxing, and “pampering” weekend. Teens are welcome. March 2-4 Alma de Mujer Retreat Center Austin, TX $145
C
OUPLES : Join us for this weekend retreat as we view and discuss John Gray’s videos, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus: Understanding Martians & Venusians, Improving Communication, Giving and Receiving Love; Emotional Needs, and Lasting Intimacy & Fulfillment. Dr. Gray is insightful, comprehensive and delightfully humorous as he shares his wisdom on how men and women are equal but different. You and your partner will be surprisingly entertained, and inspired to bring more awareness, understanding, and love into your relationship. May 4-6 Pretty Lake Vacation Camp Mattawan, MI $225 couple
A CIRCLE
OF
W OMEN : IN THE HEART OF HEARTS: What is your truth? How can we be-
gin to put our “truth” into words, and then into action? Participate in a process of getting in touch with your passionate truth, and then the process of stepping forward into ‘next steps’. January 19 Fri. 7 pm - 9 pm ILM Center, Austin No Charge THE ARTFUL YOU!: This program is filled with creativity, ritual, and wisdom. We will play with paint, clay, writing, drumming, and meditation — all which honor ourselves, our sacred space, and the ancient feminine spirit. February 16 Fri. 7 pm - 9 pm ILM Center, Austin No Charge THE SOUND OF SPIRIT: This special evening is dedicated to Spirit moving through music. We will participate in an incredible music meditation. What a great way to experience Spirit! March 23 Fri. 7 pm - 10 pm ILM Center, Austin No Charge MOVIE & POPCORN NITE: Join us as we view the film ‘Brother Sun Sister Moon’ - a moving story of a young Francis of Assisi as he renounces material possessions to seek his own path. April 27 Fri. 7 pm - 9:30 pm ILM Center, Austin No Charge 4
I NNER L IGHT M INISTRIES CALENDAR PRESENTED BY STEVEN R. MCAFEE: For additional information, call Steven at 219-485-2167
T
UESDAY CLASSES: Classes are held from 7:30 pm - 9:00 pm at Unity Church, 3232 Crescent Ave., Ft. Wayne, IN. All classes focus on spiritual development, both personally and as a
community. Classes include prayer, meditation, singing, lecture, and group discussion. Donation. Jan. 9, 16, 23 Feb. 6, 13, 27 Mar. 6, 13, 20, 27
S
UNDAY
SERVICES: Steven periodically conducts worship services as a guest minister for
various churches and spiritual groups in the Ft. Wayne area. Please call for a current schedule.
COMMUNITY NIGHTS:
The Ft. Wayne ILM “community� comes together for potlucks, music nights, video nights, and outings. Most of these events are also suitable for children. They are usually scheduled spontaneously as an inspiration arises within the group. Please call Steven for details.
M
CHRIST WORKSHOP: Although you need not have participated in previous programs to attend, this program is part of our on-going series exploring the mystical teachings at the heart of the Jewish/Christian tradition. You will learn chants, meditation techniques, prayers, and other practices for deepening your inner life. There is a warm sense of community developing within this group, and you are invited to come be a part of it. Each workshop will be held from 11:00 am - 4:00 pm. Donation requested. Jan. 6 and Mar. 3 Richland, MI Please note, on Sat., Feb. 3rd, there will be a meeting of the Mystical Christ study group (without Steven) at the home of Jack and Paula Ann Roach (in Richland) for discussion and meditation. You are most welcome. Please contact Paula Ann for details at 616-629-4258. YSTICAL
F
This weekend Jews around the world will be celebrating Passover, when REEDOM R ETREAT: God delivered the Jewish people from slavery into freedom. In that same spirit, we will focus on moving away from that which enslaves us spiritually (such as fears, old habit patterns, ego, etc.) into that which gives us a greater sense of freedom (faith, choice, and joy). Friday night we will celebrate with a time of candlelit fellowship, rest, and renewal. Saturday we will share in a symbolic Passover dinner and then move into an evening of prayer, meditation, singing, and sharing. Sunday we will create a simple practice to keep this sense of freedom alive in our everyday world. Apr. 6-8
Fri. 7:30 pm - Sun. 12:00 pm
GilChrist
$100
F
AMILY LIFE : We are in the process of forming a series of monthly family meetings in Ft. Wayne. Participation will be open to anyone with school-aged children or teens. The focus will be on sharing our spiritual faith with the next generation: what do we believe, and why do we practice the things we practice? Youth and adult alike will have the opportunity to share their personal experiences and to express their questions, concerns, and insights. The gatherings will be held at 6228 Lombard Place, Ft. Wayne, IN. Donations accepted. If you are interested, please call Steven for more details.
Jan. 28 and Feb. 18 and Mar. 18: 10:00 am - 2:00 pm (potluck lunch at 12:00) Apr. 14: 5:00 - 8:00 pm (potluck dinner at 6:00 pm) (Note: please be aware that new programs are often scheduled after the newsletter goes to press, and, in rare instances, published schedules may have to be altered. For current information on any event or series, please call the presenter or contact person listed with the program. Thank you.) 5
EMBRACING LIFE AND DEATH in no longer being afraid of not having the answer: to confront the mystery of life and death as it is — a mystery. We delve into the mystery of life with different sets of beliefs. We have different perspectives, traditions, and customs. These differences can divide us. They can cause us to feel separate from one another, thinking our way is superior and the rest are inferior or even adversarial. Yet, deep in our hearts, we are the same. The heart of a Muslim mother weeping over the death of her child is filled with the same pain as a bereaved Jewish mother feels. The newborn infant of a Christian brings the same joy to its parents as the baby of a Native American. It is in the arenas of the mind that we are divided and at odds with one another. But within our hearts, where God’s love is felt, we are connected. When life events occur that move our hearts with joy or sorrow, we are joined by bonds the mind cannot grasp. Every religion teaches us to live within that sacred heart. Every great saint of every spiritual tradition in every age has done so. What might our world be like if we actually lived the priorities we set up when we witness the passing of a friend? What if, every day, we treated each other, spoke to each other, and felt the compassion for each other that we do in those awesome life and death moments? What if we really recognized that in the heart, we are all the same — lifted up by the same hopes and joys, frightened by the same fears, longing for the same love? Every time I am brought face to face with the reality of life and death, I am reminded anew how I want to live and how much those I love mean to me. Today is our opportunity. Let us speak to that love that is hidden deep within our hearts. Let us speak while those we love can still hear us.
by Steven McAfee ILM Midwest Coordinator
A
s I write this, a dear friend of mine is lying in intensive care, recovering from a serious heart attack and open-heart surgery. Another friend has just lost her husband. As a minister, I pray for them, I send light to them, and I ‘hold’ for their highest good. That’s the easy part. But I am also supposed to be there for their families to encourage them. And that is not so easy. Oh, I know all the platitudes: “He’s in a better place now;” “Don’t worry, she’ll be fine;” or “It’s all in God’s hands.” And I know the dispassionate jargon, “It’s all just part of their karma;” “It’s all an illusion anyway;” or even, “You should celebrate because their soul is free now.” But all these words turn to dust in my mouth when I look into their eyes. These are people. People facing the loss of someone they love. This isn’t a workshop, it’s life. And it is not so much a matter of the mind, as it is an affair of the heart. How do we, friends of those experiencing great loss, reach into those deep recesses of the human soul to touch the place of their pain? What can we offer to fill that aching emptiness inside? So, we sit together. We pray a little. We are silent mostly. We hold their hand. We wait with them. We do not leave them alone. Now and then, a word or two of inspiration comes along, and we share them. Not meaningless, impersonal phrases, not doctrines or rhetoric, but genuine, personal statements of faith, real wisdom born of embracing the fullness of life and death together. In the process, we discover that wisdom is not having all the right answers. It is knowing that we don’t. And the strongest faith is not believing all the right things, but NEW TAPE
Excerpt from F ocusing
On Christ
NEW TAPE
A new tape by Jim Gordon
“When I say that the Christ is closer to the planet and closer to humanity just now, it isn’t that it’s closer so much as that we are focused on it. It’s more available and it’s presence is intermingling more with us consciously because we are focused on the Christ more. But we could do that every day of our lives if we would just focus on the Christ, focus on the life of Christ Jesus, and focus on the life of the Christ that we are — begin to see each day as a day of the Christ that you are. And see each day as another opportunity to live the birthing of that Christ into this consciousness, into this body and into this world.” (See page 3 for more information on ordering this tape.) 6
FROM OUR NEW ILM MINISTER: Hello to y’all. It is a great joy for me to be a part of Inner Light Ministries. It has long been a dream of mine to be able to do the work of Spirit by facilitating workshops and doing one-on-one counselings, and in my role with ILM I will be able to fulfill this dream. I am very grateful with the way my life has unfolded, with the experiences I’ve had along the way, and I see my work with ILM as an opportunity for more experiences in my continuing process of ever expanding into who I truly am. I am looking forward to getting to know each of you and to everything that will happen as I step into this service action with ILM. I thank all of you for letting me be a part of your lives and look forward to you becoming a part of mine as well. In Loving Service, Brian Yeakey
M
OVING
FROM DARKNESS INTO THE LIGHT by Brian Yeakey, ILM Minister
S
ome years ago I found myself in the middle of a dark Michigan thunderstorm, much like the storms I experienced there as a child. It was dark and windy with strong gusts of wind blowing and howling around, with bolts of lightning and loud cracks of thunder filling the sky. It was amazing to watch this meteorological phenomena. But what was more amazing to me was the phenomena that was happening inside of me ... namely, FEAR! Inside of me, I was experiencing a psychic storm of the mind, emotions, and imagination, blowing and howling around within my being, filling me with thunder and lightning. Oh my God! What was going to happen to me? Was I going to be hurt? Was I going to live? I could feel the fear of the dark storm gripping at me. What was this going on inside of me? There was no reason for me to be scared of being physically harmed — I was actually in a safe, secure and protected place. But, inside of me, I wasn’t
sure if I was safe and secure. Suddenly I realized that this was the key to this experience: “INSIDE of me!” This ‘storm’ was really going on inside of me! And I realized I had a lot of choice in what I allowed to go on inside of me! If I didn’t want to feel fear, I could change it. I could choose into feeling safe and protected, no matter what was going on on the outside. This was a turning point ... moving from the darkness (inside of me) into the Light (inside of me). From that point on, my life has been a continuing process of choosing, or moving, over and over, more and more, into the Light. It is a process I do on a daily basis — actually, moment to moment! Now, when my “storms” show up inside, I remember to use them as stepping stones and as reminders to move into the Light. That way, the “thunder” is the voice of God calling me home, the “lightning” is the Soul illuminating my path home, and the “wind” is the Spirit carrying me home. And my “home” is in the Heart of God.
PRESENTED BY BRIAN YEAKEY:
S PIRITUAL COUNSELINGS:
Brian is available for individual counselings at this time. Call 512-306-1056 for an appointment. 7
I NNER L IGHT M INISTRIES NEWSLETTER ABOUT ILM
ILM STAFF
INNER LIGHT MINISTRIES (ILM) is a nonprofit
J IM G ORDON , L AURA & T OM B EAVER , S TEVE B RATSCH , S TEVEN M C A FEE , B ILL S TRATTON AND B RIAN Y EAKEY
outreach organization founded in the fundamental principles of ancient esoteric Christianity. It is dedicated to the development and balancing of the fourfold nature of the individual. Towards this goal, it provides education and services concerned with the integration of the spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical aspects of the self, and also provides publications and materials that aid in this process. Among its fundamental tenets is that we trully are “temples of the Holy Spirit.” As we seek and express this presence within, we find the peace, love, power, and wisdom we all so earnestly desire. The many services of ILM are geared towards this path of individual unfoldment—such as meditation, study, and prayer on an individual and group basis. Service to humanity and the planet is ILM’s second major emphasis, and ILM encourages
ILM:
individual service, in any of a wide variety of possible forms, as a vital aspect of our daily experience. Please write or phone for more information about ILM.
Executive Office: Jim Gordon, 203 Buckeye Trail, Austin, TX 78746; Business Office: Tom Beaver, P.O. Box 1086, Dripping Springs, TX 78620; Midwest Office: Steven McAfee, 6228 Lombard Place, Fort Wayne, IN 46815
Inner Light Ministries logo
Wishes You The Best Of The Holiday Season!
Editorial and Publishing Office P.O. Box 164332 Austin, Texas 78716-4332 Phone: (512) 894-0992
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