INNER LIGHT MINISTRIES JOURNAL VOLUME 17 NUMBER 2
LEAP OF FAITH
by Jim Gordon, President of ILM
B
(an excerpt from the talk, The Tenth Door)
e aware if you find yourself, in your meditation, standing at the “tenth door” (motioning to the “third eye center” between the eyebrows), and you’re looking out and you might see a starry sky … if there’s something inside of you that is afraid or feels unworthy, or is in self-judgment, or if you’re afraid of God’s judgment upon you. If you feel any of this, move into loving, move into acceptance, move into forgiveness, move into that strength that is the Divine in you — and step forward. See where it takes you. In the movie, Indiana Jones and the Holy Grail, Harrison Ford’s character had to step forward, he had to take the ‘leap of faith’. He had to step off a cliff, not knowing if he was going to fall hundreds of feet down, or if somehow he was going to be able to miraculously walk across to the other side. This is a leap of faith. It’s leaving all that you know. In meditation it’s leaving the physical behind — the physical body, the imagination, the emotions, the mind — and stepping forward into something you may not have a lot, or any, reference point for. It’s a leap of faith. So — like Indiana Jones — step forward in your meditation and do it. Then the Holy Spirit can take your hand and say, “Okay, come on, let’s go quick! Don’t look back!” And off you go. This is where the story of Lot’s wife comes in. Don’t look back. Lot and his family were told to leave Sodom and Gomorrah (symbolizing the lower realms), and as Lot was taking his family out he was told, “Tell your family to not look back, but to ever look forward to where they are going. Do not look back from which you, and they, came. Because if they look back they will turn into pillars of salt.” So off they went on their journey. Lot was ever saying, “Look forward, look forward. Just keep looking forward to where we’re going. No matter what you see, no matter what you hear, whatever you feel, keep looking forward.” Well, Lot’s wife turned and looked back, and turned into a pillar of salt — she went back into the physical realm. So in truth, what that’s
JUNE, 2006
saying is: don’t look back at your past. Don’t look back at where you’ve been. Don’t look back at what you’ve let go of. Ever look forward and keep stepping forward into what’s next, what’s next. So, when you find yourself standing at the tenth door in your meditation, step into the ‘moment of God’. If you stop and look back, you will turn into a ‘pillar of salt’ — you’ll become a part of the physical-material world once again. You’ll get caught up in it. You’ll become a pillar of salt, and then you’ll have to separate yourself from the realms of matter once again. So ever look forward. Ever, ever look forward. In your meditation, in your daily life, ever step forward. Take that leap of faith — that’s what it is. Take it and know that nothing can hurt you in Spirit. Nothing can hurt you. Not even you can hurt yourself when you’re in the realms of spirit, when you are traveling in your soul body. Everything that confronts you is there for your freedom, for your liberation. So greet it, welcome it, love it, honor it, and you will watch negativity run from you fast, because it will not know what to do with loving. Negativity loves to create disturbance in you, to create fear in you, to create separation in you. It will do all it can to do that, whether you’re in the body here or whether you’re in your soul body traveling in the ‘outer realms’. If you just accept it and love it and say, “Hey! Welcome! I love you,” then it runs the other way. Then you can start running after it and say, “Wait! Wait! Where are you going?” It’ll just run faster and everything else will run away from you too because it’ll say, “Oh my God, they’ve got it figured out. They’ve won.” The lord of this creation will just let go of you, because the lord of this creation will know it no longer has power over you. You now have power over this creation. You are the lord of this creation. You can step free of it. Then you really do truly wake up. You wake up from this dream you’ve been in. You wake up and realize the illusion this really is. You wake up and realize that this really is a great stage that God created, and you’ve just been reading from the script all this time. You’ve been playing a part, a divine part, in God’s wonderful play, and all of a sudden you’ve read the last line and there’s no other part for you to play on this stage. Now (LEAP continues on page 12)
G OD IS THE ANSWER by Brian Yeakey,
Vice President of ILM
O
So if you get to learn and grow, whether you call it right or wrong, then what is it? If you find yourself coming to a place of decision making, of right or wrong, of better than or worse than, then I’d say begin to look in a different way. Begin to lift yourself to that place of neutrality, to that inner focus. If you’re confused, if you’re scared, if you’re ‘whatever it is’, then what I would recommend is to relax, and to just let it go, and to come back to the “seat of the soul,” the “spiritual eye center” (motioning to the “third eye center” between the eyebrows), inside. Just come back to the seat of the soul, and don’t even try to make a decision. Just come back to that living, loving essence within you. I have found that’s all I truly need to do. And as I’m able to return to that divine spark within me, then the way is made clear. And I realize that really the direction I want to move toward is loving. As I choose the loving, the way to go becomes clear within me. Sometimes right away, other times it takes a while. I know though, until it comes clear, all I need to do is to keep coming back to that inner focus.
(an excerpt from the talk, GOD Is The Answer)
ne of the things I’ve really paid attention to as I’ve walked the spiritual path is all the various opportunities for positive change in my life. I’ve realized that it’s really up to me to make changes, because quite often things just stay the same if I don’t take an initiative. But one of the tricks to taking initiative and creating change in life is to pay attention to see where the ‘energy of change’ is coming from. Because sometimes we may want to make changes, but really it’s more out of the ego pushing to make something happen, or out of our desires for something to happen, and it’s not necessarily coming from a place of loving. It’s important to watch where that’s coming from within us. If it really is coming from that movement of Spirit, then the chance to make a change is Spirit giving us an opportunity to move forward in a greater way, to continue our own expansion and growth and awakening through that greater essence of the loving within. Learning this discernment is part of the process.
So many times people ask Jim and I about physical things, emotional things, or mental things: “What should I do in the world? Where should I live? What job should I take? What should I do as far as relationships?” My answer is always to remind people to go back within. Just go inside, because truly, if you really hold to the divine living, loving essence within you, it’ll become clear. But you’ve got to give yourself the chance and you’ve got to give yourself the time to let it come clear. You don’t need to make it come clear, simply let it come clear. You allow it to come clear by simply holding your focus on God within.
But I’ve also seen so many people freeze up when it comes to making changes or decisions, because they’re afraid of making a mistake. Questions flood their minds. What if it’s the wrong decision? What if things get worse? And so I say: pay attention first, above all, to what is your inner experience. What are your concerns? What are your resistances? What are your excitements? What are your hopes and fantasies and expectations? Look at all of it. Don’t avoid any of it. And as you really begin to look at all things, they all begin to come into alignment. I have found that it’s when we resist or avoid looking at what’s going on that we remain in a state of imbalance or indecision. And I have found that it doesn’t really serve me to remain in that state. And quite often actually what’s going on here is it’s giving us an opportunity of learning. It’s all about the learning. That’s all this is about. There really is no wrong decision. There’s really even no right decision. What it is is an opportunity to learn and grow. If you make the wrong decision, you get to learn and grow from that. If you make the right decision, you get to learn and grow. 2
For instance, many years ago I did a spiritual retreat, and in this retreat I had a profound experience. In that experience, I realized, I knew, that God is the answer to everything. I remember being so blissed out, and in that bliss I was sharing with everybody, “Don’t you get it? God is the answer, to everything!” Everybody had questions and I just kept saying, “God’s the answer!” And of course, even in a spiritual group, they thought I was crazy for saying, “God’s the answer.” Even though that’s what they were looking for in that retreat, they looked at me like I was crazy. But it was fun, because (GOD IS ... continues on page 13)
I NNER L IGHT M INISTRIES
CALENDAR
CLASSES & PROGRAMS: SUMMER-FALL 2006 PRESENTED BY JIM GORDON and BRIAN YEAKEY IN AUSTIN, TEXAS:
W
For additional information, call 512-306-1056.
EEKLY
CLASSES:
Jim and Brian’s weekly class is held on Sundays, 10:30 am - 12:30 pm at the ILM Center, Franklin Sq. Bldg, 3724 Jefferson, Ste. 100.
Each class includes spiritual teachings, practical exercises, group discussion, and meditation. Jim and Brian help participants to become more deeply aware of the Spirit within. No charge.
v
PRESENTED BY BILL STRATTON IN AUSTIN, TEXAS: For additional information, call Bill at 512-218-1995.
OING WITH GOD: This workshop will explore our individual focus of Light in our daily world G from the place of Loving and Light that is, and the expansion of and living from this consciousness of Lov-
ing. It is about being present with our own Divinity. We will begin the class by listening to a meditation CD by Jim Gordon, followed by a short discussion and practice of this loving focus. Then we will take this experience and fine-tune it out in the world. SEPT 23
Saturday, 2-3:30 pm
ILM Center
No Charge
Inside each of us is the Inner Garden, or the Holy of Holies. This workshop was ANCTUARY: S created in response to a number of requests to have something available that would assist each of us in
the transitioning from being in a retreat to going back into the world. We will implement various tools and meditations from Jim and Brian’s seminars to create, and to avail ourselves of, in this inner and outer jouney towards ‘sanctuary.’ OCT 21, NOV 4, DEC 9 & JAN 20
Saturday, 1-3:30 pm
ILM Center
No Charge
(ILM Calendar continues on pages 4 - 9)
Welcome Inner Light Ministries! Welcome to to Inner Light Ministries! Introductory Packet Introductory Packet In this packet you will find ILM’s book LOVE AND LOVING; the CD UNDERSTANDING THE ‘INNER’ PATHWAY; the CD LOTUS MEDITATION; ILM’s brochure INNER LIGHT MINISTRIES GUIDELINES FOR INITIATION AND INITIATES; and a copy of our latest newsletter. All of these materials were selected to give a newcomer a good understanding of who we are and what we’re about. If you would like an Introductory Packet for yourself or someone else, just let us know. Call us, email us, or write us! Feel free to take a look at our website too: www.ilm.org (more information on page 12). We are happy to do what we can to assist you on your spiritual journey. Blessings of Peace, Joy and Loving To You! Jim Gordon, Brian Yeakey, and The ILM Staff 3
ILM presents:
in Hawaii
Sunday, August 20, 2006
MEDITATION & SEMINAR with JIM GORDON and BRIAN YEAKEY
TIMES OF EVENTS
MEDITATION: 10:00 am-12 noon Lunch break Sharing and Q&A: 1:30-5:30 pm WHERE: Ohana East Hotel, Waikiki, Hawaii
Meeting Room off of lobby located on the 2nd oor. Park in the Ohana East garage located at 2375 Kuhio Avenue (all day parking with validation is $3.00).
DONATION ONATION
For further information regarding this event please contact: Nadine Ferraro at 808-988-7509.
INITIATIONS and APPOINTMENTS August 16 - September 5 Jim and Brian will be available for appointments and for initiations for those who have been approved. To schedule appointments with Jim or Brian for initiations or appointments please call 512-306-1056 and speak with Laura Doggett. 4
ILM presents:
in Indiana
THE PEARL OF GREAT PRICE A RETREAT WITH THE ENTIRE
ILM
STAFF
September 29 - October 1, 2006 WHEN: FRIDAY 7 PM - SUNDAY 12 NOON
WHERE: POTAWATOMI INN AT POKAGON STATE PARK ANGOLA, INDIANA $175 “The divine melody that comes out of the heart of God is being sung eternally. It is ever there being sung, waiting for us to one day begin to hear that great song. Waiting for us to begin to sing that song with it so that we can begin to go back where we came from. It’s in singing that song and becoming one with it that we get this Pearl of Great Price, that we return back to the place from which we came.”
— — Jim Jim Gordon Gordon from from T THE HE P PEARL EARL O OFF G GREAT REAT P PRICE RICE CD CD
Come join us for the meditations, the fun,
the fellowship, and the awakening!
For further information regarding this event please contact: Steven McAfee at 260-485-2167. 5
in Michigan and in Indiana
ILM presents:
in Ft. Wayne
Tuesday, October 3, 2006
QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION with with J JIM IM G GORDON ORDON and and B BRIAN RIAN Y YEAKEY EAKEY
T TIME IME OF OF E EVENT VENT:: 7-9:30 7-9:30 PM PM
AT AT U UNITY NITY C CHRIST HRIST C CHURCH HURCH,, 3232 3232 C CRESCENT RESCENT A AVE VE,, F FTT.. W WAYNE AYNE
D DONATION ONATION
in Kalamazoo
Saturday, October 14, 2006
QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION with JIM GORDON and BRIAN YEAKEY
TIME OF EVENT: 2-5:30 PM
AT UNITY OF KALAMAZOO, 1204 WHITES ROAD, KALAMAZOO
DONATION
For further information regarding these events please contact Steven McAfee at 260-485-2167.
INITIATIONS and APPOINTMENTS Oct.1-Oct. 10 In Kalamazoo: Oct. 11-Oct. 15 In Ft. Wayne:
Jim Jim and and Brian Brian will will be be available available for for appointments appointments and and for for initiations initiations for for those those who who have have been been approved. approved. To schedule appointments with Jim or Brian please call Steven McAfee at 260-485-2167. 6
I NNER L IGHT M MINISTRIES CALENDAR PRESENTED BY LAURA KESTEN: For additional information, call Laura at 512-894-0992.
S
Writing is a dynamic tool on the journey to self-healing and self-fulfillment. TORIES UNTOLD: Writing can be a way to find our hearts, our truths, and our voices. In Stories Untold, we invite the heart to openly and freely experience and express itself, leading us to greater levels of acceptance and forgiveness. Sharing our stories (optional) with a loving, safe and supportive group can deepen our experience. No experience necessary!
MICHIGAN:
JUNE 17-24 (Intensive) AUG 25-27 OCT 20-22 DEC 8-10
TEXAS:
JULY 22 AUG 29-SEPT 3 (Intensive) NOV 25-26
INDIANA:
SEPT 8-10
FOR
Saugatuck Cottage Dorothy’s Cottage Yarrow Conference Center Yarrow Conference Center
Saugatuck Saugatuck Augusta Augusta
Laura Kesten’s Home Red Corral Ranch Laura Kesten’s Home
Dripping Springs Wimberly Dripping Springs
To be announced
Ft. Wayne
$275 $125 $125 $125 No Charge $275 No Charge $125
C OUPLES:
COUPLES GATHERING & DINNER: You and your partner, significant other, better half, etc., are cordially
invited to share in an evening of dining with other couples. Regardless if your relationship is brand-new or long-lived, a partnership or marriage — we’ll celebrate our loving and gratitude with these persons with whom we live and share our lives. Potluck. JULY 1
5 pm
Tom & Laura’s Home
Dripping Springs, Texas
No Charge
“ LAF:” LOVING, ACCEPTANCE AND FORGIVENESS:
Laugh (LAF) all the way to God through three simple actions: Loving, Acceptance, and Forgiveness. This workshop is designed to facilitate the ridding of ‘old baggage’ — belief systems that we think and act upon but which no longer serve us — through lifting our spirits to greater heights, so that we can begin to walk the “straight and narrow path” back to the Heart of God. JULY 7-9
ILM
Fri 7 pm - Sun 10 am
Yarrow Conference Center
Augusta, Mich.
$150
G ATHERING, MOVIE & DINNER:
All are welcome to join us on Saturday, August 18 for a potluck dinner, movie, and social time. Please bring a dish to pass. th
AUG 19
4 pm
Tom & Laura’s Home
Dripping Springs, Texas
No Charge
Please be aware that new programs are often scheduled after this calendar goes to press, and, in rare instances, published schedules may have to be altered. For current information on any event or series, please call the presenter or contact person listed with the program. Thank you. 7
(ILM Calendar continues on next page)
I NNER L IGHT M MINISTRIES CALENDAR PRESENTED BY STEVEN MCAFEE, MIDWEST COORDINATOR: For additional information, call Steven at 260-485-2167.
T
Steven offers a series of weekly ILM classes in Ft. Wayne on Tuesday UESDAY CLASS SERIES: nights from 7-8:30 pm at Unity Christ Church. Each series focuses on a specific spiritual topic and runs from 4-5 weeks in length. Some of our recent topics have included: first century Christianity and the lost books of the Bible, and the mystical inner path in sacred scriptures. Please call Steven for current information.
ILM
C
More fun community nights are on their way! We’ll provide soft OMMUNITY NIGHT: drinks and munchies. Please RSVP a week ahead so we can plan appropriately. JUNE 3
MUSIC NIGHT
Sat. 7-10 pm Steven & Anita’s home
Ft. Wayne, Ind.
No Charge
Ft. Wayne. Ind.
No Charge
NOTE: By request, this is a special Saturday night edition, instead of our regular Wednesday evenings. So we hope some of you out-of-towners will be able to join us!
JULY 12, SEPT 13 MUSIC NIGHT
7-10 pm
Steven & Anita’s home
S ”Y S G : The following workshops and retreat K are open only to those already enrolled in the Kindred Spirits program this year. If you are interested in “
INDRED
PIRITS
EARLONG
TUDY
ROUP
learning more about our yearlong study programs, please contact Steven. JULY 2 AUG 4-6 SEPT 3
WORKSHOP RETREAT WORKSHOP
Brigade of Light room, YWCA Seasons at Fetzer Institute Brigade of Light room, YWCA
(Last meeting of this year’s series)
Ft. Wayne, Ind. Kalamazoo, Mich. Ft. Wayne, Ind.
Donation $150 Donation
PIRITUAL LIVING” RETREAT: Come join us at GilChrist, a spiritual retreat center located on 67 S beautiful acres of rolling woods and fields which provide a quiet and nurturing environment for contemplative
“
practice. You will be housed in one of eight secluded hermitages encircling a common meadow with a small stone chapel for meditation and prayer. You will have private time to meditate, write, walk the large outdoor labyrinth, stroll through the woods, or read at your leisure (with the option of choosing books from a wide selection of spiritual literature in their library). We will also meet together to meditate, sing, and talk about how to bring Spirit more fully present in our daily lives. JULY 14-16
Fri 7:30 pm - Sun 2:30 pm
GilChrist
Three Rivers, Mich.
$140
IVING THE FULLNESS” WORKSHOP: This workshop will focus on how to live more fully by L bringing more spiritual awareness into every area of our lives. In our daily lives we typically find ourselves
“
shifting our attention back and forth, from our inner life to our outer life and back again. How can we integrate the two? Can we maintain our focus on God, not only in our meditations, but also in our times of active involvement in the world? How do we extend the awareness and loving we experience within into our outer experiences? We will share insights and suggestions that Jim and Brian have presented and discuss how we might apply them in our personal lives. JULY 22
10:00 am-4:00 pm
Penny Miller’s lake cottage
Kalamazoo area, Mich.
Donation
S : Steven frequently serves as a guest speaker for various churches and spiritual S groups in the Fort Wayne area. If you would like him to speak to your group, please call to make arrangeUNDAY
ERVICES
ments. The following are presently scheduled: JULY 2, AUG 20, SEPT 3
11 am
Brigade of Light 8
Ft. Wayne, Ind.
No Charge
(Calendar continues on next page)
I NNER L IGHT M MINISTRIES CALENDAR •
Community ILM Seminars and Events Worldwide ILM ACTIVITIES in KALAMAZOO, MICHIGAN:
Please contact Carolyn Dailey at 269-327-6851 (or email carolee12@chartermi.net) or Penny Miller at 269-664-3577 (or email pmiller@mei.net) for more information on the activities below.
S : Each seminar includes a short meditation time and listening to a tape or CD by T ILM Ministers Jim Gordon, Brian Yeakey or Steven McAfee. APE
EMINARS
2nd & 4th Tuesdays 6:15 pm
Penny Miller’s, 11603 Spring Point Dr., Plainwell, Mich.
No Charge
G : We will be studying the spiritual practices outlined in the ILM book, The Knowing S of God, working with each of them in our lives for one month and sharing about the practical application TUDY
ROUP
at the following month’s meeting. The meeting location has been changed to Judy Richards’ home, 4715 Thistle Mill Ct., Kalamazoo, Mich. JUNE 7, JULY 15, AUGUST 1
6:15–8:15 pm
No Charge
M N : We will be viewing movies with a spiritual theme at Carolyn S Dailey´s home, 2485 Brahms Avenue, Portage, Mich. Munchies and drinks provided. PIRITUAL
OVIE
IGHT
JUNE 20TH, JULY 18, AUGUST 15
6:15-8:00 pm
No Charge
P
OTLUCK DINNER AND GATHERING: Food and fun with ILM friends. Call Carolyn Dailey, 327-6851 or email: carolee12@chartermi.net if you are planning to attend. Let her know what item you will bring and call back phone number.
OCT 15
Sunday, 2-5 pm
Judy Richards, 4715 Thistle Mill Court
Bring a dish
ILM SEMINAR in LOS ANGELES: Please contact Victoria Eng at 310-980-2224 to RSVP before coming.
•
T
The focus of each evening is on spiritual awakening and on supporting one APE SEMINARS: another in experiencing and sharing greater loving within ourselves and with others. These seminars will be held from 6-7:30 pm at Victoria and Willard Engs’ home in Beverlywood on the following dates. JUNE 6, SEPT 12 & 26, OCT 10 & 24, NOV 7 & 28, DEC 12
•
T
No Charge
ILM SEMINAR in HAWAII: Please contact Nadine Ferraro at 808-988-7509, or 551-3123 (cell) for directions.
APE SEMINARS: Share in a one-hour meditation and fellowship opportunity on Monday evenings in Manoa Valley, Honolulu, Hawaii from 6-7:30 pm. Bring friends ... newcomers are welcome.
•
ILM SEMINAR in LONDON, ENGLAND: Please contact Nanna Brinker at 0207 485 0699 for directions.
S : Each evening will consist of a short meditation and the listening to a CD or T tape by Jim Gordon and Brian Yeakey. Join us in sharing the path of loving and awakening into spirit. APE
EMINARS
Our ILM seminars are at 42A Montpelier Grove, London NW5, on the following Sundays from 5-7 pm: JUNE 11, JULY 2, AUGUST 6 9
It Really Does by John Godbey (ILM member)
There is so much to ponder in my life that I decided to share it with God. Personalities, job, responsibilities, children, schedules, money, plans, friendships, they all spilled out of me. No wonder my mind wanders. There’s not enough time to deal with everything!
Picture God if you can, taking off his reading glasses, chuckling like a cello as he stroked his beard, giving me the look of a chess master who recognizes the opening ploy of a school child. “I don’t know,” he said. “That depends on you.” I chuckled, too, conceding his point. “Of course it does,” I said, “but you know, don’t you, how many lives I have left?” “You are part of myself I gave away so that you could be. Would you take your child’s life from him by numbering his years? When I say I don’t know, I don’t know. It really does depend on you.”
I asked God-knowing he is omniscient“How many more lifetimes must I endure?” Even one more would last, well, a lifetime, and seven or eight more would seem eternity but at least with a finite number left I could begin to plan my exit strategy.
CDS NOW Available: THE TOOLBOX and LOTUS MEDITATION both by Jim Gordon
THE TOOLBOX (This new CD is a two CD set: a meditation and talk) “The master tool that we are being presented for our toolbox is Loving. That’s the master tool. If and when we live in Loving we are more in harmony with who we truly are, and we are also aligned with who we truly are in God. When we are not living in that Loving, then we are still that Loving being, we are still aligned with God, but we are unaware of it ... we are living in the unawareness, we are asleep to who we truly are. But living in the Loving, we awaken ... we awaken into who we truly are, and we begin to manifest who we truly are more freely and easily.” – Jim Gordon
LOTUS MEDITATION “This Lotus meditation is a very powerful meditation ... it is the meditation in which, at eighteen years old, I opened up to the Radiant Form.” In loving, Jim Gordon
ORDERING INFORMATION: These CDs are $10.00 plus $3 postage and handling per order (not per item). Checks may be made payable to INNER LIGHT MINISTRIES and sent to: ILM, P.O. Box 164332, Austin, Texas 78716-4332. Or you can go to our website ILM.org to order (see page 12). 10
ILM Talks On CDs Excerpt from WAKING UP IN SPIRIT: “And that’s what I did. I woke up. “And that’s what we’re all doing all the time anyway, whether we know it or not, with every little experience we have — and they may seem very little, but they’re really not. Every experience we have is magnificent — that magnificence isn’t a measurement of size or proportion. Every experience is magnificent. And with every experience we are awakening. For some of us it’s a gradual awakening, because we haven’t prepared in ourselves a place where God can bring forth that second birth, the birth of the Spirit. We haven’t prepared a place of love, a place of forgiveness, a place of acceptance. “So love God before all things. ‘Have no other Gods before me’ ... not money, not lust, not possessions of any kind, not titles ... just God. And love God with all your heart, your mind, your soul, your spirit. And love your neighbor as yourself. “If you just begin to focus on those three statements, and begin to live those three, and begin to look and see how to do that for yourself, you will begin to prepare a place where that second birth will take place inside of you.” – Jim Gordon Excerpt from THE MASTER IN YOUR HEART: “It’s just that simple. It’s just that easy to go deep inside of yourself and touch the doorway to your soul. It’s almost too easy. It’s almost too simple. The trick is you’ve got to use it daily. If you really want it to be effective in your life you have to do it daily! Because that’s the only way that the soul can then align itself with you and begin to function in this life, and begin to bring you to a point of upliftment where you’re liberated and there’s no need to return once again to these realms of creation. It’s up to you. You can read a book, you can go to lectures, you can do a lot of things, but until you stop and sit and go within it’s not going to mean a whole lot. That’s the way to find God. God is there waiting to give to you in an unconditional manner, but you’ve got to ‘go in’ unconditionally and open up to his love in order to share in it.” – Jim Gordon
Excerpt from THE THREE FOLD PATH: “The Path of Sound and Light is a path of action. It’s a path of inner action: of going inside and being active inside, of chanting the name of God inside ... over, and over, and over. Bringing your attention to that ‘seat of the soul’, the ‘third eye’, and drawing up the soul quality of who you are out of matter and collecting it fully back unto itself. And then in that self, waking up and knowing the Self that you are as Soul. And then, in that awakeful state, going out the ‘tenth door’, the third eye, and traveling the realms of spirit.” 11
– Jim Gordon
Updated and easier to use ILM website
You don’t have to be in Austin to attend the Sunday classes! ILM.org — — the INNER NNER LIGHT IGHT MINISTRIES INISTRIES Website ILM.org ILM.org is being offered to share the basics on ILM, an organization dedicated to teaching The Path of Sound and Light, and to enable everyone interested to purchase ILM books, tapes and CDs online. It is now simpler and faster to gain access to: * Audio versions of ILM’s weekly Sunday Morning Classes in Austin, Texas * All past and present ILM Newsletters * Information on ILM Initiation into The Path of Sound and Light * Online registration for some ILM workshops and retreats There is also a special section for ILM Initiates Only.
AND ... you can now download the talks from the audio section. Some of the recent talks in the audio section that you can listen to are: “Inner Resurrection” “Seeking Inner Light” “Loving Who You Are” “Seek First The Kingdom Of God” “Becoming A Living Prayer” “GOD Is The Answer” Check out our recently updated http://www.ILM.org today!
Leap (continued from page 1)
by Jim Gordon
the last word, to the last letter, and to that period, and then ... we start repeating it all over again. Because we don’t know what to do with ourselves. We don’t know where to go with ourselves, so we begin either to create a new play or to repeat the play we just finished, thinking, “There’s nothing else to do, so I’ll just do it over again.”
you can leave the stage and return back to your true self, the life of your own beingness. You’ve completed the play you were here to fulfill. One day you’ll wake up and know that. You’ll see that. You’ll see that your “book of life” has been a divine script that God laid out. That you were just doing it line by line, word by word, letter by letter, fulfilling everything God wrote for you, as soul, to fulfill, until finally you got down to that last period of that last sentence, and it’s done. What’s amazing is we get down to the last sentence, to
12
So the key is, when you get to that point where you are complete, allow yourself to be complete. Hold to the neutrality. Hold to the loving. Hold to the divinity inside yourself — and be free. Be free in this creation. Fulfill whatever is left for you to fulfill here. And when you step free of this body, you will step free of this creation — and you will be a liberated soul.
GOD IS ... (continued from page 2)
opening the door to allow the greater Spirit within us to continue moving forward in learning and growing through our experiences.
by Brian Yeakey
And I’ll throw this one out there for you too — how do you know that it wasn’t Spirit within you directing you to create a mess in the first place? How do you know? Where was your intuition leading you? Do you judge it, if all of a sudden something seems to go wrong or out of balance in your life, thinking, “I thought I was following Spirit.” Maybe you were, and maybe you weren’t. All I know is, all I need to do is to bring myself back to that loving focus within, to always love, to always accept, to always forgive, first myself and then anybody else involved with me in the process. I know when I do that, everything is always perfect. It really is perfect, it’s amazing how perfect it is, even no matter how botched up it seems to get at times — because sometimes those great mistakes are our biggest opportunities to really learn and grow. And if we find ourselves trying to avoid that or resist that, all we are doing is holding ourselves back.
in that ‘craziness’ I had the clarity. I like those kinds of crazies, because that’s the real joy of living the loving. And that really is the answer — God. Ever since then I’ve always known that, that God is the answer. I still go on through my personal process, of where I get caught up in my mind, emotions and body, by trying to figure things out or make the right decisions. And every time I do, it usually just gets me stressed, anxious, my solar plexus gets tied up in knots, I get headaches, whatever it is … I just go through my process. And every time that happens now, I know to give myself feedback, to say, “What are you doing? Pay attention. You’re not focusing on the Divine within. Go within and focus on God; that is the answer.” And once I become aware of what I’m doing, I just remind myself, “That’s right, all I need to do is return to the inner focus.” Sometimes I do it right away, and other times I sit there for a little while ‘churning it out’, going through a process, realizing it’s just not working. But even then I eventually just let it go, and I come back, and I just go within. I begin to chant the “Names of God,” to hold that focus; and as I do, it just all comes to peace, just like magic. If you really want to know the true magic, that’s it. It’s amazing that when you really give yourself the chance, and really hold to that inner connection with Spirit, it actually does come to peace. So when making a decision, give it time — give yourself time to go within. Don’t be so impatient to make it happen now.
The nice thing is, when coming upon change in our lives, in most cases something will happen no matter what. Sometimes it’s decision by default. And sometimes that’s for our greater good anyway. Because if we don’t make the decision, and God comes in and moves us forward even if we resist it and don’t want to move forward, then as we do we find out it was really the best thing for us. Even though it may not have seemed like it, and it may have been disturbing. As the change unfolds over time, we can really begin to see the greater learning, the greater truth, and we grow through those experiences — even those that we don’t think are really for our greater good.
Sometimes when we jump to a decision too soon, without taking the time to go within first, we create a little bit more of a mess. But again, that doesn’t mean it was the wrong decision. All that was, was an opportunity to see what we are doing in our lives, and what goes with the choices we make. And those are wonderful learnings. So don’t be scared to make the wrong decision. Don’t be scared to make a mistake. Don’t be scared to create a mess. You can always clean it up. You can always realign. Really, you can. And believe me, it’s also a wonderful way to become humble. If we can say, “I was wrong, I apologize, I’m sorry. I forgive myself, I forgive you, I hope you forgive me.” It’s a wonderful place to come to, that state of humility. And in that place of humility, we are also once again
So pay close attention to what unfolds in your life. As you begin to really look, maybe you’ll see that there actually are no wrong or even right decisions, that all there is is a continuous movement from one experience to another. And that all we really have to do is learn and grow from all our experience. Maybe life is that simple. And as you pay attention, through all of that, and as you meditate and truly awaken to the divine within, you will realize that, in reality, God is the answer. Nothing out here, no matter how it looks or comes about or moves about, is the answer. God is the answer. And as we learn to look for and to see the Spirit within all of our experiences — physically, mentally, emotionally, all of it — we can never go wrong! 13
EDITATION – F M D T L ISTRACTIONS
H
O
ROM IBERATION
(an excerpt from the talk, Becoming Soul Liberated)* low, all flickering and absolutely beautiful. We stayed in there for a little while, and then we came back out and he said, “So where have we been?” And I said, “I don’t know. I mean, I don’t know what level we’re on. I can’t tell where we are.” And he said, “That was your physical body.” He said that in every living thing, in the very center of the atoms that make up every part of that body, is the fire of life. And that if one truly knows how to meditate and how to enter into the different levels of consciousness, one can actually enter into their physical body and witness this for themselves — the divine spark in each and every cell.
ow many of you, when you’re seated in meditation, find things with your physical body that are distracting you? I want to share a little bit about some of that so you might begin to understand a little bit more about what’s going on. For me, it used to be a feeling as though something was crawling on me. I’d always think that somehow some ants had gotten on my leg, or a spider, or where I used to live it was scorpions … we had scorpions everywhere … oh, my God. Literally, during the summer we would kill at least one scorpion a day. With that thought in mind I’d close my eyes to meditate and of course I’d think, “Oh, they’re there.” So, it went from ants to spiders to scorpions, but I would feel sensations as if things were moving and crawling on me. Or I would feel sensations on the top of my head, and I would think, “Oh, a fly, a bug, there’s something up here.” And the first inclination is to get it off … “I don’t want that scorpion or spider on me.” And so I’d brush it — and nothing would be there. And I found after a while, as I was moving more and more into letting go of the body, that it was important to just sit through that sensation — to not let it distract me, to not let it call me back into the physical form. And something I’ve realized in my meditations recently is just what is taking place during that time.
What happens is that when we come down to the physical from the soul realm, it’s not the complete soul, if you will. It is a divine spark, a part of the Soul essence, that comes down into this creation for experience. And the way that the soul continues to give this physical form life, is to put itself into the physical form as these flames in the center of every atom that makes up our body. And it’s that fire that Aristotle was talking about that is the essence of life, the live-giver to the physical form. Now the challenge is that long before we came down into the physical form and took on physical embodiment for this incarnation, our soul first came into the physical universe, the physical creation, and took onto itself the mind, in order to experience in the lower realms. And when it did, it began to be enveloped by the mind and trapped there. And in that entrapment it continued to look for experience, and so it allowed the mind the opportunity to share, to teach, to take the soul into experience. And so it allowed this encasing, this entrapping of the soul, so that it could have full experience. As that took place, the soul began to loose sight of where it came from and how to get back. And so the mind then took the soul essence on down into the sensual nature in the physical body.
The Greek Philosopher, Aristotle, when he used to initiate students, used to talk a lot about “the fire.” He said that creation had four elements to it. It was earth, water, air and fire. And he said fire was the source of life, the breath of all things. And that the fire burned through the breath that was coming forth to nurture and to feed and to maintain all life in the air, the water and the earth. Recently I had a meditation, and in that meditation I was taken by Aristotle into an out of body experience. As soon as we left we were standing before a very large temple. He didn’t say anything, we just looked, and then he opened the door and we went on in. As we did, the temple was filled, I mean just literally filled, with candles … all aglow. And it was just beautiful. It was the most beautiful brilliant golden white, and yel-
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So, with that divine spark, that soul essence, seated in the physical body at the “seat of the soul,” at the “spiritual eye” (motioning to the “third eye center” between the eyebrows), it feeds life into every atom of (LIBERATION continues on page 15)
LIBERATION (continued from page 14)
by Jim Gordon
the physical structure. And it feeds it in such a way as to impart its own self into every atom of the physical body as little sparks of fire.
For me, when I was younger, I found that I have a real strong ‘controller’ inside, and it always wants to be in charge, and it always wants to have its way, and it always wants to stay conscious and present with what’s going on so that it can dictate the process. So for me my challenge was to relax into the experience, to relax into that which was taking place and not try to figure it out, and not try to take charge of it, and not to discourage the experience from happening just because my controller couldn’t understand it or take charge of it. So for me it was a challenge to learn how to let go, to relax, to be present with what is, and not to get caught up in the moment and try to run it or rule it in some way. I would hope that that’s not your case. I would hope that you would find the way to just be present, to be joyful in whatever the experience is, and to allow yourself to go into a deeper place as this process of the soul coming back into itself fully takes place.
So now, when you are meditating, you may start feeling sensations of tingling, itching, insects, whatever it might feel like. For me sometimes it has felt like a painful process, and sometimes it’s an itching, and sometimes it was as though that part of me was just going to sleep. You know how sometimes your arm will go to sleep, or a hand, or a foot — it was that kind of a sensation once in a while for me. What’s happening is this: you are withdrawing from the body by holding your attention at the spiritual eye center. You are withdrawing the soul element, those sparks, out of the cells and on up to the seat of the soul. And as that Light begins to withdraw from the atoms to go up into the seat of the soul, you might feel the sensation of that Life Force separating from the physical body. Now it doesn’t mean that you’re going to die because you’ve separated the Life Force from the physical form. The soul continues to feed life into the physical body while you’re in this practice, this action of meditation. It isn’t until one’s final breath is taken, when the essence is withdrawn at that time, that life is also withdrawn from the physical form, and then the physical form is dead. So in this meditation process, even though you’re withdrawing that divine spark, that is in the center of each atom, back to itself, you are not withdrawing totally the life essence, the Life Force, that is going to keep the body alive. So in this process, if you do have physical sensations, whereas in the past you would readjust your body, or you would reach down and kind of rub it, or scratch it, or try to get the insect off … just let that be. Let that be and just be present, and keep chanting, holding the attention at the spiritual eye center. And you’ll find pretty quickly that you’ll move on past that sensation that has been distracting you, or discouraging you, or trying to keep you occupied with the physical. You’ll move right past it and move on into something else … it may be a different sensation in a different part of the body, but it’ll be something else. And if you will just sit with that long enough, you’ll find that you will begin to really, truly sense that you are moving more
into that spiritual consciousness and into the meditation of a soul coming awake. It is a gradual process, but it is a joyful one. And the more you can let go, the more you can relax into the experience, the more you don’t try to control the meditation, the quicker you can move through all of this.
The Apostle Paul talked about this as, “Die the little death daily.” And truly that’s what you are doing. You’re doing exactly what will happen on the day you die. At death you withdraw the soul back onto itself so that it can look up and go on out of the physical body, and leave the physical body, and then the body becomes cold and lifeless. And what we are doing in meditation is the same process exactly — except we’re dying but we’re dying the “little death.” The Life Force stays present in the body — it doesn’t withdraw; that physical element of life at the level of the consciousness, which is the mind, the emotions, the imagination, and the physical quality of knowing and being still, maintains awareness and Life Force keeps flowing. But the Light of the Soul withdraws back unto itself so it can journey. The soul essence withdraws and begins to have a journey back home to Spirit.
• • •
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* This is an excerpt from the talk, Becoming Soul Liberated (the new title for a CD that will be coming out next fall), which was presented April 12, 2005 and appears on the ILM website with the working title, “Distraction To Liberation.”
O
RNERY!?
LISTEN YOU @#§¢*! ordinary. I had hoped it meant something else; I wallowed in misery and in disappointment. I wondered again why this word had the power to make me feel so bad about myself, why I had rejected it with so much ‘charge’, and why I felt so rejected. In asking these questions, I began to take personal response-ability — I began to look closer at the way I had responded internally. I looked at my own reaction to one simple word, and consequently the blame I had placed onto this woman and onto myself lifted … and this action allowed me to connect with the charge I had on the word, and, the next day, to its origin.
by Laura Kesten,
T
ILM Minister
his past April, Jim Gordon and Brian Yeakey led the ILM retreat Experiencing the Divine, which I attended as a participant. Towards the end of the retreat, while Jim was leading the group through an exercise, a person reached to give me a hug, and whispered, “You have ornery eyes.” I was surprised by the remark and thought maybe I had heard wrong, so I said, “What?” And again, she said, “You have ornery eyes.” I winced as I went on to the next person.
Early the next morning in my meditation I went back to being a little girl, where I remembered my mother would use the word. “You’re too ornery — go to your room until you can be nice,” she’d say to me in a dismissive tone. Right then, as I sat in the dark, in my meditation chair, and I had this memory, I suddenly realized that my reaction to this woman’s comment to me stemmed from believing that if someone saw me as ornery, then I wasn’t being nice. “Oh, my God!” I thought. That was what I was charged about; it was black and white for me: nice meant I could be with others whereas ornery meant I was bad and had to be isolated.
For the remainder of the evening I kept wondering what she meant by that, that I have “ornery eyes.” She was smiling when she said it, or was she laughing at me I wondered … I couldn’t decide. I reviewed my interaction with her in my mind, and as a way to self-protect I thought, “Ornery!? Well, I wasn’t ornery until she said that!” And I tried ‘blowing it off’. However, when I got up the next morning to sit in meditation, I realized that I was still bothered by the remark. “I wonder if God is ornery,” I heard myself saying inwardly. I started to cry. This one word was burning inside me and keeping me from sitting in loving meditation with God. A single word, “ornery,” had me dead-locked — instead of being able to focus on my meditation, I was caught in a whirlwind of questions and doubts about myself. I spent my meditation time wondering what exactly did she mean, worried that that’s what people experienced with me more than loving. Then I spent some time defending my orneriness to myself, whining about how hard I had worked over the years to soften my exterior. I then shifted the blame from myself to this woman — after all, Jim had said to do the process in silence. I also felt angry at myself that I had become so easily distracted by this. I was absolutely miserable.
I immediately went into acceptance and gratitude and placed the whole situation — this woman, myself, my mother, and the word “ornery” — into a river of loving. It seemed effortless then to move into forgiveness. And I felt a heavy veil of judgments, confusion, blame, and guilt instantly lift. It was absolutely amazing. After coming out of meditation, I also used another tool I had learned years ago — a fill-in-the-blank: “I’m a good person and sometimes I’m _________.” I changed the “good” to “nice” and repeated: “I’m a nice person, and sometimes I’m ornery.” I later spoke to this woman and told her of my process. She had no idea that her words, which she said she meant playfully, had had such an impact on me. For all of us, any word can hold a charge for one person but not for the other.
After the meditation, exhausted from my ride on the emotional rollercoaster, I began wondering just why this single word had so much power over me. What exactly did this word mean anyway? The day after the retreat I had looked “ornery” up in the dictionary. There were three meanings: 1) uncooperative and irritable; 2) meager whether out of poverty or lack of generosity; 3) 16
Yesterday my husband, Tom, asked me a question that I had already answered earlier that day. I snapped at him saying I had already answered that question, and he smirked, “There are those ornery eyes again.” I started to laugh and loved/accepted/forgave my orneriness as I apologized and answered his question again.
BEYOND BELIEF by Steven McAfee,
I
ILM Minister
To illustrate the process of moving from “believing” into “knowing,” imagine for a moment that you heard about the beauty of the Golden Gate Bridge and a longing awoke in you to see it. You do not know if it really exists. You may believe the reports about the bridge and its beauty from others and from books and magazines, but you yourself do not know. Then, one day you meet someone who has been there. He cannot only describe the bridge to you, he can tell you exactly how to get there. Do you believe him or not? If not, you will not follow his directions. In the meantime, you hear people arguing about the Golden Gate. None have been there. One says it is a triple-deck bridge, another only a single-deck. One says it runs east and west, another north and south. You wonder who is right. So you decide to find out. Following the directions of the man who went there, you reach the bridge and experience it for yourself. Later, you hear others discussing the bridge. Two claim to have been there. The first says, “It is so beautiful — just like the gold on my wedding band, so shiny and lovely.” The second one looks quizzically at him and says, “The bridge is real, but it’s not golden at all — it’s kind of a dull, rusty red-orange color.” The others present laugh at the one who says it is orange, saying, “It’s the Golden Gate?!” But you now know it is red-orange, not gold. So you can recognize the one who speaks with the authority of his experience and the other who speaks only from the supposition of his belief.
n spiritual circles we often hear about “believing” versus “knowing.” But what does this mean to us? When we hear Jim or Brian talking about some spiritual reality, we understand their words and we can believe whatever we want about what they are saying. And if others form a different belief, we may think that we are “right” and they are “wrong.” But, in either case, we do not actually know. We adopt beliefs that seem right to us or that make us feel good. But that is not knowing. More times than I can count, my mind has understood the concept of what they are teaching and I think I’ve “got it.” But if I actually have a direct inner experience of what they are talking about, then I know. For example, for years I have heard about the “inner light,” and I have visualized it in my meditations. But when I actually experienced the inner light — not as my imaginary creation, but as a radiant, living essence — I was astonished by its reality. This inner Light and Sound which we call the Holy Spirit is not something we are supposed to believe in, nor something we can only visualize; it is REAL. It is already there; we have just been asleep to its presence. The Path of Sound and Light that Jim and Brian are presenting is not a system of beliefs. It is a way of awakening into the reality of Spirit. Granted, we must begin with belief — we must at least believe that what they are saying is possible, or we would never proceed any further along the path to investigate it. But ultimately, the truth of what they are sharing is not found in believing. It is found through an inner knowing by direct personal experience, and meditation is the key that opens the door to those experiences. In meditation we begin to experience the loving that we have longed for. And as we learn to hold to that loving, the Holy Spirit can work more intimately with us, taking us step by step into the realms of spirit where we truly know who we are as soul. Our part is simply to open the door to God — by doing our meditation.
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When people speak of the “kingdom of heaven” or the realms of spirit, most speak out of their belief. Only a few actually speak from experience. The beauty is that we can find out for ourselves. If we follow the directions and walk the Path as taught, we will have experiences that demonstrate the truth of the teachings, and, we’ll be able to discern those who speak with knowing from those who are merely speculating, no matter how convincing they may speak. It is good to believe in God’s love. But it is so much more wonderful to actually experience it. That is what we long for — not merely to believe in God, but to know God through direct experience.
NNER LIGHT IGHT MINISTRIES INISTRIES JOURNAL INNER
ABOUT ILM INNER LIGHT MINISTRIES (ILM) is a non-profit organization dedicated to teaching spiritual awakening through an inner practice of meditation. This meditation practice is an inner path through which the soul transcends the physical realms of creation to its true home in the spiritual realms within the heart of God. In spiritual teachings and literature this inner path is often referred to as “The Path of Sound and Light,” “The Path of The Holy Spirit,” “The Path of Love,” or simply as “The Path” or “The Way.” ILM offers initiation into this meditation practice enabling one to fully experience this inner journey of awakening.
To provide support for those individuals interested in this path, Inner Light Ministries offers numerous publications, materials, programs, and services, which encourage devotion to God and support a life-long practice of prayer, meditation, spiritual study, and service.
ILM:
New Meditation CD by Jim Gordon
Lotus Meditation
See page 10 for more informaion about ordering.
Main Office: Jim Gordon, P.O. Box 164332, Austin, TX 78716-4332; Financial Office: Tom Beaver, P.O. Box 1086, Dripping Springs, TX 78620; Midwest Office: Steven McAfee, P.O. Box 5139, Fort Wayne, IN 46895
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