Learn to love change by exploring identity

Elle Vail ‘23 Staff Writer

Many people mention how much I’ve changed over the years. Sometimes friends and I look back at past pictures of me, and I appear almost unrecognizable between the various hairstyles I’ve had (bangs, short hair, brown hair, black hair, red hair, etc) to my clear changes in personality. I can affirm that such changes reflect a lot of experimenting with my identity and who I want to be.

It’s in Westport’s competitive nature to apply pressure on students at an early age. With packed sports schedules and rigorous academics starting in middle school, there is pressure to grow up and know who you are as a person very early on. I felt this pressure in addition to a lack of knowledge of my own identity.

That being said, I noticed I felt better when I embraced discovering my identity, even if that meant making mistakes. I learned to love change by constantly experimenting with hairstyles, fashion and persisting in finding what made me happy, even if this meant abandoning what was once important to me. I’ve even changed my hair, recently going blonde, to compliment the various stages in my life.

The most favorable moments in my teenage years involved seeking out new opportunities to discover my identity. For instance, some of the most important people, activities and memories to me would not exist without trial and error when figuring out what feels most authentically “me.”

It took me until my junior year to figure out I didn’t want to train to be a recruited athlete in soccer. But when I joined the diving team my senior year, I learned I enjoyed sports if I approach them with less intensity. I would not have learned this without taking the risk of joining a sport my senior year.

Additionally, Finding a job I liked, required a lot of trial and error. I went from a bakery cashier to a camp counselor and then, ultimately, landed a job in Ecommerce at Mitchells that resulted from showing up to a casting call photo shoot. I have never regretted accepting an invitation that can lead to potential opportunities; I have learned that the anxieties and unknown aspects of such situations are opportunities for growth. I would not have met some of my friends without embracing change.

I began to find value in meeting new people as much as possible, even if it meant taking the risk of reaching out: a few of the most positive connections I’ve had with people took place while traveling with strangers through the Dominican Republic last summer.

It has been in cherishing those moments that I have defined myself.

Once I gave myself this time for self-discovery, I was able to distinguish myself as a person apart from my achievements. Looking back at the past four years, it is apparent that successes come and go, and are impossible to be defined by. This makes it that much more important to know who you are apart from them. By seeking out these new opportunities for growth, I have learned the most about