Scene Issue 210

SCENE ISSUE 210: TUESDAY NOVEMBER 9

6'6" 6'0" 5'6" 5'0" 4'6" 4'0" 3'6"

WILD BEASTS

LOCAL NATIVES

MYSTERY JETS

CRIME SCENE CRIME SCENE

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Music News...

CULTURE LISTINGS

WILL HAYDON and TEJA PISK reveal all the latest news and gossip from the music industry

CAUGHT IN A BAD B.A. I AIN'T SAYING HE'S AN EGO-MANIAC A US university has decided to offer a course on Lady Gaga. From the start of next Spring, Professor Mathieu Deflem, a specialist in counter-ter rorism, international policing and abortion policy will unleash his inner Little Monster when he begins teaching "Lady Gaga and the Sociology of the Fame."

Something of a Gaga uber fan, Deflem has set up a blog to Gaga, owns more than 300 copies of her albums and has seen her perform 28 times since April last year.

He said that "if you

don’t like her, you probably shouldn’t take the course," although he also warned that "the better fan will not necessarily be the better student."

The focus will be on the ‘sociologically relevant dimensions’ of Gaga’s fame, exploring her music, videos and fashion.

Deflem originally intended to use Lady Gaga as an example in a course on the Sociology of Celebrity but then though, "what the hell? Let's make the whole freaking course about Lady Gaga".

LIVING legend Kanye West has released 'Runaway', a 35 minute video to accompany his upcoming album, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. Also the name of his lead single, 'Runaway' follows the story of a phoenix that crashes to earth and is rescued (by Kanye West). He grooms her by keep-

ing her in his garden with his other pets and exposing her to impromptu, ballet sequences (as you do). The polished film, which incorporates nine songs from West’s new album, is being compared (by Kanye West) to Michael Jackson’s 'Thriller' and Pink Floyd’s 'The Wall'.

Semi-professional ego maniac West has said that the colours of the film – vivid reds, greens and whites – are symbolic, and the imagery has drawn comparisons (by Kanye West) to Picasso and Matisse. The music and imagery take centre stage, although the strength of West’s acting in the few scenes with dialogue has prompted comparisons (by Kanye West) to Quentin Tarantino and Spike Lee.

THIS

HE'S BEEN TO OXFORD BUT HE'S NEVER BEEN TO SCUNTHORPE

UNDERGROUND grime rapper turned household name Tinie Tempah recently gave a speech to the Oxford Union before the final performance of his UK tour at the O2 Academy Oxford. Tinie offered his thoughts on success which he called "subjective", commented on his "fantastic" education and answered questions from students.

Clearly relating to Tinie's "very, very, very wild lifestyle" one student said that "it was cool to have someone who is our own age and who is on a par with people here."

The Frisky singer is an interesting

choice for the Union which has close ties with Oxford University and is known for its high-profile speakers. In the past guests have included the Dalai Lama, Mother Teresa and Albert Einstein. Next stop, Nobel Prize.

BIEBER FEVER! EVER LISTENED to a poptastic hit from pint-sized, Sean Kingston bothering wonderkid Justin Bieber and thought "I wonder what that would sound like slowed down 800 times?

WELL NOW WE KNOW! Type "Justin Bieber slowed down" into YouTube and watch the magic happen...

BANDS ON A BUDGET

Stephen Barbagiannis tells us which bands to see without breaking the bank...

It's week 5, and your first term of university is slowly but surely moving into its second half. That student loan you received doesn't seem to be lasting as well as you had first hoped, and your overdraft can be a lonely place.

Simply put, allocating funds for cultural enrichment probably isn't on the top of your list of priorities. So for that reason, here are some bands and artists for under a tenner to show you can still go and see live music without breaking the bank.

NOVEMBER 11 THE VACCINES STEREO £4 The Vaccines, a new London based band with an already impressive following, are being hotly tipped by many in the industry. Amongst their fans are the NME which labelled them in a recent edition the "About to Break" band ahead of their UK tour.

Their style is upbeat indie frequently delving into a more punky style particularly in their debut single 'Wreckin' Bar (Ra Ra Ra)' with many songs barely reaching two minutes. They appeared on Jools Holland last week so if you cannot even afford the £4 fee be sure to catch them on that.

NOVEMBER 11 JON WINDLE THE DUCHESS, £7.50 Jon Windle, formerly of Sheffield outfit "Little Man Tate" is back making music, only this time as a soloist. Although he may no longer go under an alias, his ideals and song writing have remained much the same as before; feel good music with catchy sing along choruses. However amongst these tracks there are some slower ones in his set showing some distinction from his earlier work, worth a listen if you were a fan of Little Man Tate.

NOVEMBER 22 AKALA THE COCKPIT, LEEDS £8 To say Akala is a Hip Hop artist is too simplistic. The rapper (brother of Ms Dynamite) crosses many genres distinguishing himself from many of his peers.

After breaking out of London's underground hip-hop scene with his first album 'It's Not A Rumour' he won the MOBO award for 'Best Hip Hop Artist' beating Kanye West to the title. Promoting his new album DoubleThink which truly does challenge any preconceptions of what a hip hop album should sound like calling on a number of styles to inspire it.

NOVEMBER 22 GENTLEMEN'S DUB CLUB THE DUCHESS, £7.50 The Gentlemen's Dub Club is a ska/reggae/dub band from Leeds with a dynamic sound combining tight rhythms with a heavier sound to impressive effect.

There are nine members to the band which allows them to produce a vibrant, full sound with a huge stage presence. Their shows are high energy, as they demonstrated during the festival season, including at Glastonbury. With their ability to make the audience part of their show they are well worth a watch.

NOVEMBER 26 THE YOUNG GUNS FIBBERS, £8.50 The Young Guns are a quintet from High Wycombe, and have burst onto the scene with their debut EP. They've won some some big fans along the way, including Bon Jovi, who chose them to open his first gig at The O2. They are a band that seems to have been able to find an identity in a saturated area of the industry. Whether they will be remembered alongside the greats is another story, but for now if you like their music it might be worth seeing them at Fibbers, before they start to play some bigger more expensive venues.

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Hannah Voss reviews this week's...

SINGLES Duffy well well well

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or an artist who must be aware that she sometimes veers close to the wrong side of shrill, Duffy does not seem to be playing it safe with her new single . But vocals aside, 'Well Well Well' is catchy and fun, with instrumentals from hip hop group The Roots lending a diversity that might otherwise leave the song lacking. 'Well Well Well' is a solid track that delivers the Duffy formula of soulful lyrics and a poppy feel, ensuring fans will not be disappointed.

local natives discuss smurfs and small time surf with chris craddock kele oN the Lam

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rom the depths of Silver Lake, Los Angeles emerged the Local Natives, one of the latest popular indie rockers to hit the music scene.

Their debut album, Gorilla Manor, named after the house that the band shared in Orange County, was released last year to critical acclaim. The fivepiece modern worldly folk group have "a lot of great memories" and while describing it as "definitely a mess more often than not" they still managed to get most of the writing done in the hole that constituted the living room.

Aside from battling the chaos that engulfed the room, the boys regale in tales of vivid memories of singer Kelcey Ayer dressed as Papa Smurf and drummer Matt Frazier as Beaker from the Muppets. Although I am highly bemused by this bizarre concept of an aging blue midget with a ginger, mute scientist, amazingly the madness is not finished yet. They go on to explain that the unlikely duo were "playing beer pong at one of our parties", something I now feel should be a requirement of all house parties.

Now the boys from the States have been touring the circuits. During their tour they have so far hit the Queen's Head Stage at Glastonbury, as well as playing Reading and Leeds. The band said that "the energy at these bigger shows is incredible. We really just focus on trying to connect with t h e crowd and play o u r s o n gs as

best we can." This, despite the fact that they "only get 10 or 15 minutes to set up and we spend most of that trying to get the stage crew to let us move the drums and monitors closer together so that it feels more intimate."

The step up to these major stages (despite the limited time restraints) has really helped Local Natives develop their live act further as it forces them to be "so far apart from each other and from the audience" which "is something we've only started encountering over the past two months." But as the saying goes "all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" and Local Natives made sure they got their share of play at these festivals. "We really made an effort to experience Glastonbury. On Friday night we literally didn't go to sleep." And that wasn't all; the lads got to enjoy watching Thom Yorke and Jonny Greenwood's surprise set from side stage, which they say was only topped by all the bands from all the different stages hanging out behind the Park stage.

By this point my envy is visibly bubbling through and the band quickly changes the subject. We now go onto the band's experience of playing in the UK. The boys were initially taken aback "with how passionate British audiences can be." While we know that the indie kids over here are probably the best, it came as a bit of a shock to the guys who especially enjoyed the considerable amount "of singing along, which was great."

After the gigs they explained that they "always just enjoy going out

with the locals whenever we can." I am told it is the best way to "see the most ridiculous and unique stuff" which unfortunately the band would not give specific examples of due to their highly inappropriate nature.

They would however divulge to me that they had "always wanted to see Stonehenge" but the rigours of a tight tour schedule meant that they only "saw it for 15 seconds while we drove by it on the way to Glastonbury." I decided to refrain from telling them that Stonehenge is actually one of the dullest places they could visit while over here. Instead I employed a more subtle tactic and suggested a few beaches that I love to visit in South Wales. "We'd all love to hit the beach if we catch a free moment". After some reflection I realised that coming from the Orange County, they may be slightly disappointed at what Pink Bay near Porthcawl can offer in comparison.

After swapping surf stories I ask what the next Local Natives' album will be like. Since they are still touring, the reply that they "really haven't had any discussions about the next album" doesn't come as a huge surprise. I am glad to hear that "album number two will bear similarities to Gorilla Manor but it's going to be better", ruling out the drastically different second album.

The band knows its sound, what their fans want to hear and they respect both of them. "We just want to grow and progress, but beyond that I think we'll just see where the songs take us".

We finish the interview with a question about how their rise in the music industry has affected their previous long-term friendships to which they answer unanimously that "we've become insanely close over the past few years".

Although the band puts this down to the large amounts of time they are spending together, I have a different explanation. As I quizzed them on their gaming preferences they all said they had "never owned an Xbox" which reaffirms my strong belief that this games console ruins friendships. So it is simple really; the success of a band's friendships lies solely on their choice of console.

'O

n the Lam' offers more in the way of electro and dance than you might expect from someone whose roots are so firmly grounded in indie music. The track skimps on the vocals in favour of a heavy, distinctive bass line and choppy sampling. This may go some way to explaining why the song feels, at times, generic. There is basically nothing wrong with this song, and it is likely to enjoy an enthusiastic reception, yet in a time when electrodance tracks like this are abundant, there is nothing that makes it stand out from the crowd.

gorillazDoncamatic

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he smooth, sophisticated vocals of obscure soul artist Daley are the first noticeable thing about this track, as he sings strangely calming words about the technological era we live in. The second thing about the new single from the acclaimed 'virtual' group is that they manage to retain their classic electro/hip hop sound whilst producing a track that sounds newer than ever. Recorded in just a few weeks, the track is not part of any studio album at the moment. I can't help but think that an album following in the footsteps of Doncamatic's funky, laidback style will be well received. And the apparently nonsensical name? A reference to a 60's Japanese drum machine.

Black Gold shine

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f you were to listen to the first minute and a half of this track, you would be justified in walking away considering Black Gold to be just another subdued indie group with unassuming, disheartened vocals and steady but unexciting percussion. However, the arrival of the first chorus, heralded by an climax of percussion and vocals alike brings a poppy transformation to the group that is suddenly reminiscent of Take That. It is quite impressive to see the ease with which the band shifts from obscure to mainstream, especially without compromising any of its sincerity.

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Albums...

Cheryl Cole

Messy Little Raindrops

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Out Now

s Cheryl Cole seems to keep several tabloids in business, it’s easy to forget that, occasionally, she finds the time to put out some music. Even more shockingly the music is actually quite good. So, when her latest single, the catchy 'Promise This', hit the airwaves, I had high hopes. Sadly it turned out to be almost as disappointing as Diva Fever’s untimely Xfactor exit.

The first thing that hit me after listen-

Kings of Leon

ing through Messy Little Raindrops was that it sounded horribly dated. 'Yeah Yeah Yeah' could’ve been a big hit on the Ibiza party scene and I wouldn’t be surprised to find that 'Amnesia' is actually a rejected Brandy b-side. Impressively, 'Waiting' manages to sound older than Vanessa Carlton’s hit 'A Thousand Miles' - the song it’s sampling.

Another problem is the lyrics. I don’t think anyone was planning on looking to a Cheryl Cole album for revolutionary song writing, but some of the lines served up seem excessively inane and cringeworthy. The highlight comes in 'Happy Tears', where we’re treated to Cole wailing emotionally about painting her toes.

However, the album is not devoid of good material. The aforementioned 'Promise This' so far has my vote for pop song of the year, while 'The Flood' is a solid ballad, which would make for a great second single. 'Let’s Get Down', a decent potential club hit, is sadly somewhat marred by the ever-annoying Will.I.Am. It is no secret that Cole is a product of the modern music industry, which means that she has to rely on a small army of industry folk to make her into an artist. I assumed that a star of her calibre would have access to the finest team money could buy, but Messy Little Raindrops seems to suggest otherwise. Better luck next time Chezza!

Come Around Sundown Out Now

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robably the easiest word to describe Kings of Leon's newest album is "mellow". Mellow to the point of forgettable.

The thing about this album, produced by the band two years after their last album is that it is quite easy to listen to without registering anything that lead singer Caleb Followill is actually saying. Despite his trademark vocals being instantly recognisable on the album's first playthrough, it is relatively impossible to understand a single word in some of the songs written onto this record, particularly in 'Pony Up' or 'Birthday'.

The Tennessee-formed rock group do provide some meagre highlights, though nothing that can be compared to Only By the Night's hits such as 'Use Somebody' or 'Sex On Fire'. Instead, first single 'Radioactive' is less anthemic, though home to such lyrics as "And when they clash and come together and

MILANA KNEZEVIC

Taylor Swift Speak Now

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'Long Live' and 'Never Grow Up' touch upon themes important to her, like the importance of childhood, family and respect. Her voice has also grown much stronger. Whilst it is undeniable that modern technology has improved the quality of her voice, it is still possible to recognise that is has become much mature. This is especially evident in the high notes she hits in her ballad 'Enchanted'.

All in all, if you are a fan of Taylor, you are automatically going to love Speak Now. And if you are sceptical, give the album a listen, it may be a nice surprise.

CAROLYN TRINE

PAUL VIRIDES

The Wanted The Wanted

Out Now

peak Now is a huge departure from Taylor Swift’s first two albums, and it in no way disappoints. Her hugely anticipated album channels less country and plunges into the realm of pop. Whilst some may consider this risqué and may accuse her of blending into the pop scene, but this is definitely not the case.

Taylor differs from pop artists like Miley Cyrus by the fact that each song is a diary entry of her life, making her album very personal and less commercial. 'Innocent' forgives Kanye for his infamous tirade at the VMAs, and 'Dear John' accuses John Mayer of taking advantage of her feelings for him. For those who know John Mayer’s music, one will immediately recognize that Taylor has copied his signature acoustic guitar style, making it a very personal and harrowing attack. Despite most songs carrying more of a pop resonance, she continues the country tradition of telling a story, and does so creatively and beautifully, like in 'Speak Now' and 'Back to December'.

This album demonstrates Taylor’s growth in terms of maturity and lyrics. Whilst her former two albums were filled with adolescent views of love, she now views love through the lens of a young adult, who has experienced actual heartbreak and regrets. Songs such as

start rising / Just drink the water where you came from... " in an album that is very rooted in the band's home life. Featuring a couple of songs that are clearly harking back to their southern roots, including a 60s-style love song 'Mary' and the country-inspired 'Back Down South', the album does at least try out some different styles.

It's these songs that are more exciting than 'Radioactive' and the host of songs that are instantly recognisable as being Kings of Leon. As a departure from their old 'noughties' sound, 'Mary' and its counterparts serve to attempt to redeem the album and give some life to what is otherwise a very limp record.

Unfortunately Come Around Sundown is severely let down by quite simply not being very exciting to listen to. With many songs blending into one and inspired lyrics being let down by Followill's seeming inability to pronounce his words, this is an ambitious album that doesn't quite go the extra mile.

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Out Now

or many people, the term boyband is heavily stigmatised by those curtain sporting, baby faced youths of the 90s, but the current revival is attempting to refresh the concept. The emergence of JLS and the unquestioning devotion of tweenage (and slightly disturbingly not-so-tweenage) fans of the pre-pubescent One Direction have shown that boy bands can still be successful, adding pressure to bands such as The Wanted, to do something different.

The group, consisting of Max, Jay, Nathan, Tom and Siva - the token Irish- have been safely toeing the party line claiming instant (and slightly sinister) affection towards the album calling it their "baby" and comparing it to their ‘first kiss’ before using witty wordplay to thank their "TWFanmily" for support.

The Wanted's self titled debut has enjoyed immediate success with the first two singles, 'All Time Low' and 'Heart Vacancy', haunting the charts in recent weeks. This is no surprise as, whether through enjoyment or irritation, both tracks are extremely catchy and are guaranteed to remain wedged irremovably in your head. Despite attempting to replicate this attribute, the rest of the album is not as immediately catchy, but offers up-tempo tracks, including "Made", written by Taio Cruz, and slower, more chilled, tracks, such as "Golden", that teaches us all a valuable lesson about not "living life in black and white". Further life support is disseminated through the medium of music with the band offering to

be a "Personal Soldier" for those who find that "life is like a battlefield… that blows up in your face".

Despite these important lessons, the diverse styles used in the album makes it hard to establish what target audience The Wanted are aiming at. For a first album it is a solid attempt but any claims to being "a new breed of boyband" are crushed by a failure to make a substantial step away from the stereotype. The music may be slightly generic, but on the plus side the new memorabilia is pretty darn superior with "Shiva is my boyf" t-shirts available for the bargain price of just £14.99. Simply place your order and allow up to twenty-eight days for delivery to receive this stylish slice of fandom in time for Christmas.

The music may be nothing more than a solid two and a half stars, but The Wanted undoubtedly gain a further half star for their clever "TWFanmily" wordplay, their personalised web cam message, and their t-shirts that offer the opportunity to feign a relationship with any member of the band!

Far from perfect, but not bad for a "first kiss!"

SCOTT SIMMONS

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HOOTING AND HOWLING

DAVID ELLIOTT:

DUBSTEP BITCH

VISION find out that there's more to WILD BEASTS than booty calls and falsetto

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ild Beasts look like four, fairly average indie lads; slightly dishevelled hair, and awkward.

The instrumental line-up screams 'Bogstandard Indie', just guitar, bass, drums and keys, no "I'm actually really into Motown" brass sections or "I'm proper folky" banjo solos. Yet something magical seems to happen when this group of unassuming blokes get together. Their first album, Limbo, Panto released in 2008 received a gentle wave of critical acclaim, but it was last year's Mercury nominated Two Dancers that really took flight setting self-appointed tastemakers salivating to the point of indecency.

The story begins in 2002 when school friends, singer Hayden Thorpe and guitarist Ben Little, formed a duo named Fauve, in their home town of Kendal.

However it wasn't until the duo joined with drummer Chris Talbot (referred to as Bert because it makes them "sound like boys in a work house") and relocated to Leeds where they met bassist Tom Fleming, that Wild Beasts really began to take shape. The group explain the name change: "having a French name was sort of shorthand for "we wanna be an art band". We changed to make it both a clearer expression, and to pun on the fact that we are not a boogie band."

It is this desire to subvert expectations appears to drive them. Central to their sound is Thorpe's soaring "marmite" counter tenor vocals, that can be stately or oddly lasivious when delivering lyrics such as "this is a booty call" in 'The Fun Powder Plot'. The band seem unmoved by the critical furore that has surrounded this distinctive falsetto, describing it as a practical rather than deliberately divi-

sive decision. "Hayden has always had a blinding falsetto range, I think he found an expression somewhere near the top of his range and has been whittling it down ever since."

Another talking point is their poeticism, with NME describing Two Dancers as "like listening to Ted Hughes reading poetry in the drawing room whilst Ted Hughes has a breakdown in the kitchen".

Critical catatonics aside, there is something undeniably intriguing about the album's curious mixture of shameless ribaldry (see "this is a Freudian slip, my slipper in your bits" on the album opener) and insightful observations of British life. When quizzed, the band describe this distinct style as a result of the "painful process" of trying to find a recognisable voice: "It goes back to breaking from mundane reportage style stuff and trying to tell a story without the drudgery."

Nobody could accuse tracks such as 'All the King's Men' which describes a lads night on the pull with all the rakish flair of a regency dandy, of bland reportage.

The song describes how the predatory protagonist hunts "birthing machines" from an array of "candied queens" from locations as seemingly random as Hounslow, Roedean and intriguingly Shipley (the rather small and unremarkable Northern hometown of one our editors).

When asked about this eclectic choice of locations, Little describes how they were intrigued by this "nondescript, fairly isolated, faintly gothic town with a lot of bored people who don't know they're beautiful. I like Shipley, and wanted to remind everyone that it existed and that we knew it did."

The power of locations appears to be a

recurring theme, with pastoral imagery of both the rolling Yorkshire moors of their adopted home and the picturesque lakes of their birth place remaining a constant backdrop. Little directly links this relative musical isolation, compared to the concentrated competitive scenes that dominate the musical centres of Manchester and London, to the band's aforementioned struggle to find their own distinctive voice. "It was a painful process trying to find a language that was our own when we were young. I've always said that we have to do the sort of things that only we could do, be the most ourselves possible." It is testament to this quietly determined groups that even their detractors have to admire their originality and flair.

CHRIS CRADDOCK and RACHEL PRONGER

IS ELECTROPOP BULLETPROOF?

In a recent interview La Roux controversially announced the death of electropop, but is she right?

VISION engages in the battle of the synths...

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he synth reverberates.

A bored male voice declares "I don’t want to go out, I wanna stay in", there are a series of handclaps and the whining voice of Katie White sings such inspired lines as ‘I wanna play piano with two hands’. Ladies and gentleman, electropop is dead with the song 'Hands' a rusty, Ting Tingshaped nail in its coffin.

Of course, electropop hasn’t always been a dead genre. From the 1980s it’s spawned such sensations as Depeche Mode, Soft Cell and the Pet Shop Boys. Further who, after a few drinks, can really resist the allure of Reflex’s revolving dancefloor when Human League’s ‘Don’t You Want Me’.

But in the past few years electropop has become increasingly diluted, with artists as diverse as Miley Cyrus, Editors, Katy Perry, Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Lady Gaga all choosing to dust off their synthesisers, pick up their keytars and make music with an 80s electropop style. The results have not always been bad, and in the case of Gaga have been key to her musical Midas touch, but the prevalence of electropop infused music has deprived the

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he fact that we are basing this debate on something La Roux, has said, a singer well known for being able to be imitated by Noel Fielding on Never Mind The Buzzcocks by using an orange peel with a face drawn on, says it all. Why she would come out with this statement seems bizarre seeing that her own music is often termed as electropop, unless she has had the sense to admit that her songs are really just twaddle with a bit of synth thrown in. However, let's pretend Elly is actually a respectable expert in the field for a moment and not just a glum Dickensian chimCHRIS ney sweep, and take her statement of “If I see anything HOGG more 80s themed, I’m going to go bust” as exhibit A. The very statement itself explains why electropop will never truly be “dead”.

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genre of any identity. Far from the daring computerised sound of the originators of electropop, the music has just become a style for artists to flirt with on occasional tracks without any real conscious thought or inspiration.

So I propose it’s time for us to put the genre to rest, at least until producers in ten years time feel the time is ripe for ANOTHER 80s revival. In the meantime we can wait expectantly for La Roux’s brave new sound after her denouncement of electropop. I’m hoping for a slap bass album of Tom Jones covers!

Elly gets sick of it and we all follow suit, electropop will raise its bejewelled eyes once more, just under a new NME approved moniker. Something clean and sharp like “Smack Dance” or “Neo Synth”. The very fact that sweet chimchimeney Elly has had to state that electropop is 80s proves that this is the case because, surprisingly, music trends sometimes evolve and the same synthy nonsense that was being played in the 80s is not the same being played now.

Not being alive in the 80s, it's hard to know whether by its end Gary Numan declared that “synth happens” and everyone moved on, but even if he did, it still managed to wrangle its way back to our radios in the 00s. Electropop isn’t dead, it’s been bitten by musical zombies and is bound to return. The same can’t, of course, be said of Elly, who has decided to going acoustic for her next album – a decision that proves how on the pulse of cutting edge music she really is.

LAURA CRESS

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o, somehow, dubstep has stood the test of time. Having been knocking around muso-circles for almost a decade now, the genre emerged from the woodwork last year, blinking, tripping out and then ingratiating itself into hipster culture (“it’s, like, so primeval, y’know?”) like an annoying wobbly parasite. And now, with the formation of dubstep’s first mainstream supergroup (composed of Skream, Benga and Artwork), it’s jumped the final hurdle: it has its own dedicated York Uni club night. That’s right, Fibbers, Monday night: we’re gonna get like totally wrecked and SPAZZ OUT TO DNB AND DUBSTEP YAHHHH. This makes me happy, because hopefully with mainstream recognition of dubstep will come MAINSTREAM HATRED OF ALL IT REPRESENTS. I’m not talking about dubstep ‘selling out’ either, 'cause that implies that it had something to sell other than prettily packaged dog shit in the first place. Acres of silence (sorry, minimalism) and a low end consisting entirely of quote unquote FEROCIOUS WOBBLE doesn’t make for a good night out, Skream (by the way, replacing Cs with Ks stopped being cool when you stopped playing Mortal Kombat). Even crossover attempts ‘indiestep’ (oh my god…) bands fail to convince me that dubstep producers are anything but a bunch of vacuous wankers – Exhibit A, Mount Kimbie, who make dance music so limp Fred Durst would blush.

Even worse than dubstep’s pathetic lunge at vanguard status is the scene that has sprouted up around it: legions of coked-up douchebags thrashing about like its NINETYNINETYONE PEEEEEEOPLE, proclaiming dubstep the best thing that’s happened to dance since PPK Resurrection and acid. You likely know the sort – your friend who loves going out, like everyone else, and getting smashed, just like everyone else, but, unlike everyone else, needs an ARTISTICALLY CREDIBLE reason to do so.

So no thanks, when it comes to Monday night I’ll be giving Fibbers a miss; you can find me in Willow instead, bopping along to Mason vs Princess Superstar and cursing the shameful day I was drawn to buy MoS: The Sound of Dubstep. Even if Phaeleh’s ‘Afterglow’ is a tremendous tune.

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Lives...

Fibbers, York

Leeds Uni Met SU 21/10/10

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Taka Hirose and new drummer Karl Brazil confidently stepped out to a deafening roar from the crowd.

The opener, 'Barking Dogs' taken from the latest album set the tone for what turned out to be a fantastic set.

It can be difficult for bands with such a vast back catalogue to choose what to play on a tour promoting a new album but Feeder definitely got the balance right.

A particular highlight for me was 'Feeling a Moment' which was performed with as much energy as a band touring with their debut album.

This energy was present throughout the whole set, particularly for the encore which was, in my opinion, perfect. The crowd left in a jubilant mood after hearing 'Seven Days in the Sun' and 'Just a Day', two early hits which prove Feeder’s status as one of the best British indie bands of the new millennium.

ELIZABETH HILL

My Chemical Romance Edinburgh Corn Exchange

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he fact that My Chemical Romance’s three date, intimate club tour of the UK sold out in less than fifteen minutes is a sure indicator that, despite a three year absence from these shores, they remain very much at the forefront of punk rock.

The last time the world saw them, they were performing under the guise of The Black Parade, a bold venture that left them exhausted, disenchanted and threw the band’s future into uncertainty. This is perhaps why their twenty-two song set tonight is comprised largely of material from their new album Danger Days, (released 22 November) and their 2005 breakthrough Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge.

Whilst classic songs such as "I’m Not Okay", "Helena", and even an aggressive rendition of "Our Lady Of Sorrows" from their rarely played debut album satisfy the hardcore base of dedicated fans, it is perhaps the new material that is the most exciting. The angst and introspection from "Three Cheers" is gone; vanquished are the uniforms and the rigidity of The Black Parade era – tonight My Chemical Romance are colourful, reckless and visceral. Gerard Way, newly dyed red hair blinding the audience, stalks the stage like a man possessed whilst guitarists Frank Iero and Ray Toro display the sort of intensity and rage that hasn’t been seen at their live shows since they last performed at venues of this

CULTURE LISTINGS

Youngblood Brass Band

Feeder

eeder’s hits have become staple student anthems over the last decade.

They can be heard at university club nights across the country and so it was unsurprising that the current Renegades tour began at Leeds Met Student’s Union. I've been a Feeder fan for many years but had never actually seen the band live, and so had high expectations.

Some would say that Feeder peaked with the release of their early albums, particularly Echo Park (2001) which provided the infamous single 'Buck Rogers'. However, there are gems to be found throughout the band’s seven album discography and the most recent one of those, entitled Renegades is no exception.

Support came in the form of Londonbased alternative outfit Cape Fear, who provided a fitting start to the night; their music had a rather reminiscent feel, think early Lostprophets. Then, Grant Nicholas,

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25/10/10

29/10/10

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ork's gig scene may not be the most impressive, but intimate venues such as The Duchess and Fibbers deliver some real gems. It was the latter that was host to Youngblood Brass Band.

This nine piece hip hop/ funk fusion band, or riot jazz if you ask them, came from Wisconsin to share their passion for brass band music. A sousaphone, two trombones, three trumpets, two percussionists and a saxophonist hammered out big soulful instrumentals such as 'Brooklyn' and a cover of Chaka Khan's 'Ain't Nobody' getting the capacity crowd moving. These were followed by the melancholy love song 'Elegy' with restrained use of instruments and thoughtful MC provided by D. H. Skogen. Throughout the course of the night each member was introduced and played a solo, including Nat McIntosh on the sousaphone who played with such gusto and attack he seemed psyched for a fight. Despite bellowing out the bassline all night long, he still managed to dance under his immense instrument. All members seemed to thoroughly enjoy playing for us and

truly shared their passion. Around 45 minutes into their set, Skogen made a request for sofas on which the band could stay the following night, after the encore the band returned out to meet the revellers.

Unsurprisingly, the majority of the crowd seemed to be clamouring to have these guys stay over. In short, London can keep Wembley Stadium with Take That and U2, just as long as Fibbers and The Duchess bring us more quality artists such as the Youngblood Brass Band.

If you ever get the chance, go to see the Youngblood Brass Band play, failing that listen to them.

DOMINIC CAUNT

Yann Tiersen 28/10/10

The Cockpit, Leeds

size and even stage shy bassist Mikey Way finds time to move to the centre of the stage tonight and play with a previously unseen vigour.

The only drawback is the venue itself, but even The Corn Exchange’s combination of woeful acoustics (think of a mobile phone playing music on loudspeaker in your old school sports hall) and view-obstructing pillars at every turn can’t dampen the return of this reinvigorated band.

GEORGE OSBOURNE

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lways a progressive musician who is difficult enough to define at the best of times, Yann Tiersen has changed his output once again. Most famous for the jaunty, quintessentially Parisian piano compositions that dominated the Amelie soundtrack, this concert sees Tiersen sweep his piano and accordian aside and instead spend the evening alternating between electric guitar, melodica, violin and synthesiser. The result is a darker, more introverted sound that appears to bear the weight of recent personal tragedies, notably the deaths of his mother and a close friend. Yet despite Tiersen's apparent need to confront these traumas

through expressive catharsis, the songs retain an uplifting edge and keen sense of beauty and hope.

Tiersen's stage presence remains formidable throughout, his only attempt to make conversatition with the audience at the concert's outset when a technical malfunction causes the band's computer to break down.

Small talk is eschewed and it appears that for this enigmatic performer it is the music alone that is intended to supply a sufficient connection to his listeners. Nonetheless Tierson is a generous performer who obliges with a three-song encore.

The intimate venue of Leeds Cockpit was particularly apt for the experience, providing room for probbaly little more than two hundred or so people with a snug square foot of personal space. As a result, the atmosphere was close and personal, allowing Tiersen's lack of conversation to provide lovely moments of personal introspection.

On the whole this was a brilliant night out listening to one of the most underrated yet inventive mainstream musicians performing today.

TABI JOY

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RACHEL PRONGER QUIZZES "BRITAIN'S MOST POLITE FRONTMAN" ABOUT BEING ON THE ROAD WITH HIS DAD, 60S MUSIC AND SEROTONIN...

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t’s a gloomy Friday afternoon and Blaine Harrison, softly spoken singer of the Mystery Jets, is on the phone from a hotel room in Birmingham. He is unfailingly polite and thoughtful, hesitating to consider every question and scattering his speech with shy “I thinks” and “kind ofs” as if justifying his train of thought. When the interview is postponed part way through because Harrison is being ejected from his hotel room, he is charmingly profuse in his apologies even though we have already been talking for a solid twenty minutes. It’s not exactly what you expect from the joint front man of a painfully fashionably indie-pop band, created in the founders' early teens.

But then again, Mystery Jets appear to have little regard for what others think of them.

Their latest album Serotonin is unashamed, full-throttle pop. A logical progression from 2008’s Twenty One but a clear break from the more determinedly indie stylings of their 2006 debut Making Dens. Harrison denies that the band made a conscious effort to sound more commercial but agrees that they have undergone a dramatic change of direction. “There was a radical change after our first album, because we weren’t really a pop band at that point in that we were very into writing long kind of epic pieces of music. I think we kind of felt like we wanted to morph into something different. Serotonin to me feels kind of like a continuation of where we set off with Twenty One. It’s a much more complete album... it’s a much more satisfying listen because it feels more condensed and concise.” Harrison describes how much of the final sound of the album was dictated by trial and error; the result of the natural progression of song-writing rather than any sort of master-plan. “Our songs kind of dictate

the direction of the band really... you can never really tell a song where to go, a song kind of leads you.” However, he does admit that at first, the album was “a bit of a heavy listen,” and it was only with tinkering that Serotonin found its voice as an out and out pop record.

Mystery Jets began when Harrison, still in his teens, began playing guitar with his father Henry Harrison and roped in his best friend Rees. The band has since expanded to include Kai Fish, primarily on bass, and Kapil Trivedi on drums. Henry Harrison has stopped touring with the group although he remains heavily involved in the writing process.

When I ask what it is like working with a family member, Harrison claims that age is no barrier and emphasises the value of having a connection to your co-writer, “it’s always felt very natural working with him...it’s hard to describe. But sometimes I almost get the feeling as if we can read each other’s minds, in the same way brothers and sisters can feel connected in that way. We are quite good at finishing each other’s sentences when it comes to writing lyrics. He’s more of a lyricist than a musician, that’s always been his greatest contribution to the band, the words.” I wonder if writing with friends and relatives leads to more organic songwriting and Harrison admits that it allows a greater openness but also asserts that he finds collaborations “liberating”.

Their latest collaboration, 'Out of the Dark' with Count & Sinden was intriguingly conducted almost entirely by email, and Harrison admits that writing outside of the band’s occasionally “incestuous” permutations “certainly expands something!” This is a band that seem quintessentially 21st century, genre-blending and self-referential with an almost encyclopaedic knowledge of pop history. Twenty

One embraced the clear 70s and 80s influences with abandon, with tongue in cheek videos and references to a girl who listens to a “worn out 12 inch of Marquee Moon”. Harrison describes this retro streak as unconscious but admits that it was probably the result of a childhood spent in France where, without exposure to the wave of Brit Pop that was sweeping the UK, he was left only with “shitty dance music” and so instead became obsessed with his dad’s records. “What you listen to when you’re a kid very much shapes who you are. I think I’ve always had a connection to records from the 60s and 70s and that was an incredibly fertile time in pop music. Now it’s much easier to self-reference things without meaning to because it's 2010 and the 20th century was a time of massive change and invention and lots of things were done for the first time.” Links with music past seem to punctuate the history of Mystery Jets.

Serotonin very much feels the influence of its producer Chris Thomas, who has worked with such eclectic artists as The Beatles, The Sex Pistols and Pink Floyd.

Spending his teens on Eel Pie Island, an area that became famous in the 60s for attracting acts such as The Who and The Rolling Stones, also seems to have influenced Harrison’s ambition. He speaks about it with affection, describing it as “like being on Crusoe's island, quite raggle-taggle, run down” and attempts to define why this small patch of West London has become such an artistic hub. “I think it has never been a very cool place and people are always doing things there to kind of make it cool. And it's never really worked...”

Mystery Jets were, at first, famous for their illegal parties and on stage showmanship in this quiet West London suburb. Harrison describes these as more

than youthful hedonism. “When we first came out we did sort of throw these parties but I think that was us not trying to conform with the music industry and the traditions of how a band should get signed and should create a following. I think putting on our own gigs was really a way of getting round the problem.”

Struggles with the grim fundamentals of the industry appear to have remained a problem for the group, with the new album preceded by a change in label. I ask Harrison about the change and he admits that the group were dropped for financial reasons: “the head of Atlantic is based in America and he was probably looking to cut costs and just thought ‘who are the Mystery Jets?’.” Now comfortably signed to Rough Trade, who they refused in the beginning, Harrison seems content, “it feels good to go back to the start, how it should have been.”

When I ask what’s next for the band, Harrison describes more of the same: touring and making as many albums as possible. Tellingly, he also describes how he sees the future of a band that maybe sometimes gets a little too close to comfort. “I don’t want Mystery Jets to be something we feel tied to, we should be able to have our own projects and do different things.” Nonetheless he seems keen to avoid any rumours of tension or splits, and in his final comment I get a sense of just how much his life is defined by the band that has dominated their lives for so many formative years.

“Mystery Jets will always be our home, something we can always come back to” he says with real affection. And, with yet another apology and a goodbye, Britain’s most polite popstar is gone.

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THE KIDS ARE

ddir. Matt reeves

ALL RIGHT

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et Me In is in many ways the anti-Twilight. Both are stories of teenage love between vampire and human, but Let Me In is filled with complexity, dark implications and enough gore to make Edward Cullen piss his pants!

A remake of the critically acclaimed Swedish film Let the Right One In, the film tells the story of Owen, a boy living in a dead-end town in 1980s New Mexico, struggling with the divorce of his parents, a group of brutal bullies and friendship with his mysterious female vampire neighbour.

Director Matt Reeves is unflinching in his use of

dir. Todd Phillips

“I

violence, not only through the savage attacks of young vampire Chloe, but also in the actions of human characters such as the systematic attacks of bully Kenny. This means that although we get our fair share of corn-syrup slurping, the story is emotionally rooted in struggles of puberty and the potential isolation of teenage life.

The film is largely defined by the fantastic performances of its two young leads. Kodi Smit-McPhee easily wins the audience’s empathy lifting his part from simply being a rabbit in the headlights.

Meanwhile Chloe Moretz, fresh from a show-stealing stint in Kick Ass, proves her

he film depicts the lives of Jules (Julianne Moore) and Nic (Annette Bening) who are a middle-aged, lesbian couple and mothers to teenagers Joni (Mia Wasikowska, Alice in Wonderland) and Laser (Josh Hutcherson).The plot follows the (somewhat dysfunctional) family as they find and embark on building a relationship with their sperm-donor father, Paul (Mark Ruffalo). This new relationship could not come at a worse time as Jules and Nic hit a mid-life crisis. Conventional family events follow, as Joni is about to leave home, along with some unconventional scenes such as a hilariously misguided mother(s)son chat.

The film is captivating from the start, but at moments becomes too slow-paced, although the acting and beautiful scenery compensate for this.

The acting, as expected with actresses like Moore, is superb, with great dynamics between all of the key characters. The acting is raw and emotions are portrayed superbly. Wasikowska and Hutcherson are young actors who are definitely at the top of

chops as a young acting talent portraying Abby as simultaneously old beyond her years, alien and massively frightening. The only thing that holds back the film is the feeling sometimes that the chemistry of the two isn’t used enough.

Let Me In will doubtlessly stir controversy among moviegoers, especially due to the obsessive cult fanbase of the original Let the Right One In. Nevertheless, Let Me In is undeniably an intelligent, subtle and haunting vampire film which, in our Twiliterate world, we are rarely treated to.

their game.

Some of the best scenes in the film go from the awkward (first meeting between Paul and the teenagers) to the tender (bath scene between the mothers).

Don’t be fooled by the subject of the film, it's far from prudish, with great comical moments and overtly sexual scenes.

One of the film’s flaws is that the lives of Joni and Laser are under-explored. Joni’s love-life and Laser’s conflict with his best friend Clay are only touched upon and the viewer will be curious as to what resulted from these situations. However, let us not forget the film’s title IS The Kids are All Right; for once the truly dysfunctional characters are the adults.

In conclusion, this film has first-class acting and a witty, clever script. The film explores parenthood, independence and overcoming complications, but don’t worry, the emotional content is perfectly balanced with humour. There are questions left to be answered at the end of the film, but this shows the quality of the film—you care. Simply put, this film is Oscar-worthy.

Sarah Green

Chris Hogg

DUE DATE

’ve never taken drugs in my life.” And at the precise moment these words tumble, convincingly, from his mouth, so the redemption of Robert Downey Jr. (drug fiend, headcase, of late Hollywood’s darling prodigal son) is truly complete. Fortunately for us, it’s this rediscovered straight edge that gives many of Due Date’s best jokes their punch. Less fortunately, its other, more familiar character clichés only serve to occasionally drag director Todd Phillips’ night off between Hangovers 1 and 2 into the mud.

Plot-wise, Due Date is 100% Phillips' (of Road Trip and Starsky & Hutch fame) road movie fetish. Downey Jr.’s Peter Highman is a tightly-sprung architect who finds his trip home derailed by an in-flight confrontation with Zach Galifianakis’ hysterical, idiotic actor Ethan Tremblay. Landed on the no-fly list and with the birth of Highman's son imminent, the two are forced to hitch

a cross-country ride together, along with the Tremblay's horny pooch Sonny.

It’s all very vanilla - mismatched losers who forge an unlikely friendship over the course of a nightmarish few days etc. etc. To Phillips’ credit, the bumps along the road home are all appropriately chaotic, if a little well-trodden: their many rides are, by turn, totalled, impounded by Mexican border guards and hotboxed. However, for every copy-and-paste joke, Due Date throws a curveball, often pushing the bad taste boat right out. Masturbating dogs, cripple fights, zebra babies and some appalling babysitting – it’s

dir. Lisa Cholodenko

in these shocking scenes that Due Date really finds its mojo.

Galifianakis is funny, no doubt, but he’s in definite danger of digging himself into the comedy sociopath type that he plays so well.

His paternal backstory is touching enough, but consistently plays second fiddle to setpiece gags and slapstick. Likewise, cameos from Jamie Foxx and Juliette Lewis are keen but not given enough space to breathe; Foxx in particular is a huge wasted opportunity. Downey Jr. and Galifianakis rub off well on each other, but really only in terms of jokes. If you like your gross-out comedies with heart, subtract a star. For everyone else:

David Elliott

ELLIOTT'S

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four

... iDEAS For a STAR WARS REMAKE (A pictorial)

1.

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the great debate

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! e k a Rem

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2.

3.

vs

LA HAINE

I

love film and I love filmmaking, but La Haine remains to this day the only film I've ever approached academically. French coursework, 2006. And my dad (French teacher) suggested it... There were so many reasons to not like this film.

So let's all thank Gaga that I was patient and open-minded enough to enjoy La Haine for what it really is: a foreign masterpiece of international resonance.

Three kids (read: chavs) of varying ethnicities unite in the projects (read: council estates) of Paris. A handgun dropped by La Police in one of the (many) riots taking place at the time becomes the focal point of the story, as insecure-toughguy Vinz swears to avenge his friend by shooting a cop.

Mais, non! cries Hubert, whose portrayal by Hubert Koundé is at once both distant and completely naked (but not like that), the same being true of the rest of the cast. The dynamic between these unknowns is totally believable and translates universally. The film's blend of 'boys in the

CULTURE LISTINGS

Origina

l!

Vision swabbies Chris Hogg and Olivia Waring duke it out

ll I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don’t break them for no one.” A classic line from Scarface, one of the greatest gangster films of all time and a remake of the 1932 Howard Hanks film of the same name. Scarface is a great example of how, if handled right, remakes can create fantastic cinema, whether by making a classic story relevant to a new generation, like Scorsese’s Cape Fear, or reworking an inspired concept, like Cronenburg’s The Fly. These films are undeniably a few gems in a cesspool of stinking Hollywood remakes, but the gory genius of, for example, The Thing more than makes up for Jude Law smirking his way through Alfie.

Remakes also serve a practical purpose of making foreign stories accessible to a wider audience, such as the Japanese horror pieces Ringu (The Ring) and Ju-on (The Grudge), but also Christopher Nolan’s reimagining of Norwegian film Insomnia and Terry Gillam’s Twelve Monkeys.

Furthermore it’s largely through high budget remakes that works of lesser known cinema get seen by a wider public. How many more people world wide will now see Tomas Alfredson’s Swedish vampire romance Let The Right One In as a result of Hammer Horror’s English reimagining Let Me In? Whilst the news that David Fincher is currently adapting The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo has already boosted mass public interest in Niels Arden Oplev’s original film.

Finally, even at their very worst, remakes feed a very basic craving in every cinema fan: the desire to grumble. Without tepid Hollywood crucifixions of classic works of film how could we sit back, snort smugly into our popcorn and declare “Well it’s nowhere near as good as the original!”

Have you seen...?

4.

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hen it comes to film, you cannot beat an original version. The best films have their own time and place, they are attached to their era, not simply copied off an earlier model. Remakes are usually an insult to their antecedents and are just done to drum up some money for Hollywood. Can’t anyone come up with some new ideas?

In general, remakes of classics seem to be big budget nonsense. A few years ago, some numpty decided it would be a good idea to remake the brilliantly scary 1973 British film The Wicker Man ... et voila, the brilliantly rubbish remake, with Nicholas 'Rubber-face' Cage. The 1960 version of The Time Machine was eerie because of the filming techniques of the time. Don’t attempt to convince me the 2002 version was worth making. Samantha Mumba’s legs do not constitute a good film.

One merit of remakes is that they put into perspective how genuinely fantastic the originals were - The Italian Job, Alfie and Planet of the Apes to name but a few. If anyone tried to remake my favourite films nowadays, films like Groundhog Day, The Shining, 2001: A Space Odyssey, their magic would be lost to Hollywood glitz. No-one can replace Bill Murray, Jack Nicholson or the masterful Stanley Kubrick.

It also seems to me that when American filmmakers think it would be TOTALLY AWESOME to make very American versions of foreign films, such as The Ring, they always make a hash of it. Recently, I was appalled when the wonderfully shot and genuinely touching Let The Right One In, a Swedish film about a boy’s romance with a young vampire girl, was hashed into the clichéd horror Let Me In. This SHOULD NOT BE DONE, even if Americans are allergic to subtitles...

All in all, I hope you agree that nothing beats the first, the one, the only, original. Leave our films alone!

hood' with a splash of Inbetweeners-style banter is gripping and entertaining. And you know what? French is really beautiful. I wish all the chavs were French.

Writer/director Mathieu Kassovitz reached the peak of his career with La Haine (which literally translates as 'The Hate'), coasting on the waves of its success for the past decade or so with such hits(?) as Babylon AD and the like. It's totally deserved. The film bears all the hallmarks of a young director's ambitious first break. From the sweeping shots of the projects, to the intentional use of black-and-white picture, La Haine is put together in a way that really makes you think about filmmaking. That doesn't mean you have to be writing a subpar French essay in order to enjoy it. The film works because it is itself an essay on France and filmmaking, and yet it still manages to be fun. No mean feat.

So get the DVD, grab a baguette, soak it in piss and eye it reproachfully. This is a film about France, but not as we know it.

dir. Mathieu Kassovitz Review by Tom Martin

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N O I S I TELEV

, s ck a P lf o w re e W d n a s n e Forget Vampire Cov are s e b ri T y ll e T y h w s in la p x e N NICOLA CHAPMA .. r. e v o s rn o h ck lo to s g in th the new

I

t took me only a few weeks once starting university to realise that everybody has a different taste in television. Well, what they watched on iPlayer, because being stuck in the hole that is Derwent D Block, there was no such thing as a signal.

One person’s X Factor is another person’s Newsnight. So I have decided to compile what I like to call ‘Telly Tribes’.

Pick your favourite, and join the battle for the remote.

The All American You wake up just in time for Gilmore Girls to get your high-speed talking kicks, followed by Desperate Housewives re-runs. You get back from lectures just in time for the endless Friends and get excited for the almighty Gossip Girl (all hail). You dabble maybe in The Vampire Diaries, and always have time for My Super Sweet Sixteen. You still harbour a great fondness for The Sopranos, with your very own theory on that finale.

Your new favourite past time is watching Glee online before anyone else (you know, riiight?!) and it’s an unwritten rule that Scrubs takes precedence over the News. Period.

Reality Bites You can recite some of Lauren Conrads infamous lines from The Hills, hold a (not so) guilty light for Jersey Shore, seeing Snooki as modern day icon. You genuinely wept when Big Brother finished and wondered what it would be like to actually witness the sunshine between the months of May and August. You find sick pleasure in I’m a Celebrity… and when you remember The Farm you get a toasty feeling inside. Your new favourite TV delight is The Only Way is Essex and you cannot see how on earth they could have 'made up' these dramas for our entertainment. I mean it’s so real isn’t it? Of course Kirk likes the Zoo. Who doesn’t?

Game Show Lame Show You update your Facebook status

with the fact that you are watching The Million Pound Drop Live, you have a weird crush on Noel Edmonds and you wish you could purchase a box set of Deal or No Deal. You spend your Friday afternoons catching up with old episodes of Wheel of Fortune and Bullseye. You think Brucie-Forth’s talent is wasted on Strictly, he could have ruled the world with Play Your Cards Right. In desperate times you even dabble in Don’t Forget the Lyrics, presented by the marmite man himself Shane Ritchie. The Cube, Golden Balls.. they’re just for starters in your eyes. Oh and you’re still waiting on a reply from Who Wants to be a Millionaire?. Chris Tarrant must have received your application form by now. You sent it in 2002.

Serious Face Newsnight, The Politics Show with Andrew Marr, 3 Minute Wonders, Dispatches and the like. Wow. A part of you is really interested, and then a part of you just watches it for ‘the image’. Because you’re serious, like deadly serious, about world politics and all that jazz.

You let your hair down watching some Sky News and lock your door when you watch The Inbetweeners because people CANNOT find out that you enjoy a programme where profanity is rife. Gulp.

Soap Eater You see the Slaters as part of your extended family, and still can’t bring yourself to talk about that revelation by Kat. In a fight you’d take Ian’s side over Phil’s, just because, and you would love to share a cigarette with Dot. You’ve seen David Platt grow up from a little monster to an absolute idiot, and could give Gail a few tips about good parenthood. You hate Emily with a passion, but still appreciate that she took in Spider, even though the Red Wreck seemed to disappear when he did… You miss the original Dingles, even though Lisa Riley moved on to You’ve Been Framed you still couldn’t get enough. Oh and Shadrach. Sob. When

times get rocky you even switch on Doctors, because that’s just how you roll. So if you don't understand anything I've just said..GET OUT OF MY CLUB. Get it? No? Whatever.

The BBC Three Massive Don’t Tell The Bride has been in your telly diary since the beginning and, although you love the programme, it’s just something you wouldn’t do.

Snog, Marry, Avoid…what is there to say? It’s your life blood. Nothing can shock you now you’ve seen someone tape on their hair with some duct tape and used Superglue on their eyelashes.

You don’t bash an untainted lash when you see someone with a pierced neck or tattooed lip-liner. A girl’s got to do what a girl’s got to do, right? You love the pre-tan rituals, and have actually tried one of Jenny Frost’s beauty tips. I have.

You love those ‘Natalie Cassidy…’ programmes, and Coming of Age is a modern day great in your eyes. You couldn’t get more excited over Hotter Than My Daughter, and secretly hoped that the third member of Atomic Kitten would present a programme turning plain girls into total tramps.

The Daytime Gang Your TV pleasure surfaces between the hours of 9am and 3pm, just before your one 5.15 lecture of the day. It’s a toss up between Jezza Kyle and Cash in the Attic, but hey, you’ll see how you feel when you wake up. This Morning isn’t the same to you now that Fern got a makeover and up sticks and left. You constantly wonder how that wallpaper sets and the paint dries in 60 Minute Makeover (I mean, did his wife actually not know that that girl-from-Hollyoaks was going to come round with a cement mixer?). You take genuine interest in whether that family from Yarm stayed in Australia in Wanted Down Under, and a day is not a good day without a huge helping of Flog It. I mean, how could it be?

IT'S RACISM, SO IT IS...

L

by David Elliott

ast Tuesday, my happy procrastination via the medium of the delightful Fiddles, Cheats & Scams on ITV1 was rudely interrupted by an incident of MINDBLOWING RACISM. It’s true. Moving on from comforting tales of Machiavellian tax-dodging socialists and other assorted contrepreneurs, I was confronted with the shocking story of Barry and Mary Small, on first glance an innocent old couple from Antrim, who are soon revealed to have been involved in a SCAM OF DISGUSTING PROPORTIONS. To make matters worse, in court, Barry sells his longsuffering wife up the Liffey. Needless to say, the whole sorry tale is accompanied by scenes of rolling green cow pasture and a rollicking Gaelic jig.

English people may not have picked up on the implications of this racist portrait. In fact, I expect you not to have, cause you’re all institutionalised and slaves to the man. But as a Northern Irishman, adrift in a foreign land where the word ‘power’ has two syllables and buses tend to be used for transport rather than barricades, I’m attuned to these subtleties.

The fact of the matter is, English TV hates the Northern Irish.

I was first exposed to this filth as a child, while watching Neighbours (a programme SYNDICATED by the BBC – racists). Enter stage right: Connor O’Neill, a loveable Irish rogue. However, he is soon discovered to have stolen Tad’s wallet – what a scoundrel! But it’s okay, there’s a reason for his devilish behaviour, as the denizens of Ramsay Street soon find out that Connor is illiterate – what a stupid man!

Modern soaps have bravely picked up on this venerable tradition. Yeah, I’m pretty much looking at you Hollyoaks (written by racists and broadcast by a famously racist company). A quick audit of the Northern Irish characters on the show reveals this. Cheryl Brady – tremendous chav. Brendan Brady – psychopath. Kris Fisher –- cross-dressing KNOBHEAD, spells his name funny.

Joking aside, England has been lovely and kind and tolerant of my Northern Irishness since I arrived here. To be honest, much of the hate is reserved for Ballykissangel. But y’all are racists.

Remotes at the ready - My tv picks for the week

r

ye Best of ITV Pla

Gossip Girl

Even if you've already watched it, get your Gossip Girl fix online.

Pause on Chuck's face for a while. I won't judge you. Or Nate's, if that's your beef. Just do it.

Wednesday, ITV2, 8pm

Watch this week

Ramsay's Best Restaurant

He's angrier than Jamie, but not so much of a wimpy prat. Wor Gord travels the length of the country finding un-sung culinary Gods. You'll have to endure a lot of hand slapping that would hit your face if the camera wasn't there, but it's worth it. It's in the final stages, so get on it.

Tuesday, Channel 4, 9pm

TV mystery of the week...

Is Mary Byrne Nicky from Westlife's Auntie? It's a family affair!

The X Factor, Saturdays and Sundays ITV 1

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Snow, Sleds & Space Aliens The Christmas season is approaching, and it's the best time for games companies to bring out some of their big projects - though not all of them manage to do so in time. NATHAN BLADES gets stuck into four of the big name releases for you to anticipate on those lonely winter nights..

Kirby's Epic Yarn

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood Ubisoft - PS3/360/PC

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ow a well-established series, Assassin's Creed has now been polished to a sheen. Both the graphics and the gameplay have been upgraded since its previous incarnation - running across rooftops and plunging into bales of hay from dizzying heights has never looked so good, or been so easy to pull off.

And a good thing too, as the multiplayer mode offered will require all your skills. Put up against other assassins; you're given 'hits' to perform, sneaking up on your target, and taking them out with minimal fuss; all the while dodging those who're on your tail. It's a fun mixture of elaborate parkour to jump around the map, and patient stealth - blending in with the street rabble so your foes walk past.

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood releases 16 November 2010.

Marvel Vs. Capcom 3

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Nintendo - Wii

irby is adorable. In almost every game he has been a part of, he spreads both irresistable charm and emasculating cuteness. The games in question tend not to be very difficult - but the presentation and fun factor more than make up for it. Epic Yarn takes this to the extreme, with its beautiful art style. It discards the idea of hyper-realistic graphics, and fills your television screen with wonderfully animated cloth and string.

Instead of using his well known copying abilities, Kirby instead pulls apart the scenery and enemies using the string he's made out of.

Reducing obstacles to scraps of fabric and buttons is incredibly satisfying - and that feeling is doubled in Two-Player mode. In an interesting design choice, you are unable to die - getting hit or falling off-screen just reduces your score - but the decision strangely works. Even the threat of death won't stop Kirby from charming you and your friends. Scary.

Kirby's Epic Yarn has an unconfirmed release date, but will be out before Christmas.

Dead Space 2

Capcom - PS3/360/ARC

s a genre, Fighting games can be difficult to get in to. Fans of the genre tend to be incredibly competitive; making it hard for newcomers to find a place to get started. This makes the Marvel Vs. Capcom series just a little bit special; it's design giving experts an in-depth system to chew on, and newbies the opportunity to tear faces off as Wolverine, or fill them full of bullets as Dante from Devil May Cry.

The game is still incomplete - the version I played had a limited character roster. Capcom's been leaking new characters on the internet to drum up interest. It's definitely been working, at least for me. Spider-Man and Arthur (Ghosts & Goblins) are joining the fray, but some of the veterans from past games, like Gambit, are said to not be returning, which is a damn shame.

At time of writing, Marvel Vs Capcom 3 has an unconfirmed release date. Get it together, Capcom!

EA - PS3/360/PC

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am probably not the best person to be reviewing a game like Dead Space. Not so much because it's a horror game; more because I am entirely awful at Shooters.

I cannot aim for the life of me. This made the initial Dead Space something of a trial to play, and this sequel is little different.

The excellent aesthetic design is suspenseful - engines hum, gas hisses from pipes, and odd dents and scratches mark the walls. The combat is still visceral and chunky (stomping on an alien corpse, complete with thudding squishing sound effects is oddly cathartic), but the set pieces don't change if you walk through the same area twice - eliminating the suspense.

There are new enemy types, and lead character Isaac gets some hover boots to play with, but if the first game didn't pique your interest, Dead Space 2 won't sway you.

Dead Space 2 releases 28 January 2011.

Fear and Loathing in Isshu: Pokémon Black & White

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ot soon after Pokémon HeartGold and SoulSilver were released in the UK, Nintendo started releasing information on their newest PokéProject - Black & White. After 5 months of internet leaks and press releases, the 5th Generation of Pokémon has hit the stores in Japan. Touted as a 'reboot' to the main series, Black & White take place in the all new region of Isshu; a fantastical representation of America, rather than the Japanese-based locations of the previous games. Casinos, skyscrapers, and basketball players await.

To go along with it are a new set of 156 Pokémon, protagonists that are actually older than 10, and a plot more complicated than a straightforward quest to beat 8 Gym Leaders and thwart the criminal organization du jour. Yes, Pokémon has finally decided to grow up with us - which can be a little conflicting for some. For a lot of people, Pokémon began and ended with Pokémon Red and Blue, and

so the hundreds of new beasts and locations are entirely lost on them. If you're one of those people, I implore you to get with the program! Contrary to what you might think, what Pokémon (and games in general) have become won't be alienating to the fond memories of your youth.

That's not to say that the core that made the original Red and Blue so enjoyable has changed.

You've still gotta catch 'em all, you still get a rush from battling your captured minions with friends, and the number crunching behind the fights is still slick and complex. As for what kind of new Pokémon are appearing this time around - I'm personally quite impressed. They span from a gigantic electrical tarantula, to a bull with a gigantic afro, to an Ice type that looks amusingly similar to an oversized ice cream cone.

Another new feature is the Dream World, a game mode that is actually separate from the DS

game itself, and is played on your PC. You can transfer your beloved monsters to the vastness of the internet, and play bonus minigames. Prizes include almost every Pokémon from the earlier games - so even in 2010, you can still have access to Charizard and Mewtwo.

Praise be to Nintendo.

Pokémon Black & White have already been released in Japan. The EU release is slated for summer next year.

Nathan Blades

Comments? Criticism? Love to hear 'em! Contact us at games@yorkvision.co.uk

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Books News...

TANGO-TASTIC

AN award for children’s books which address LGBT themes has been created by the American Library Association. The Stonewall Children’s and Young Adult Literature Award has been created to honour "English-language works for children and teens of exceptional merit relating to the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered experience."

While the ALA is in full support

of the move, it is likely to cause a significant level of controversy in America where And Tango Makes Three, a children’s book about two male penguins raising an orphan chick, was recently named as the title Americans have tried hardest to ban. One outraged parent described the book as "a homosexual storyline that has been sugar-coated with cute penguins".

TEJA PISK investigates the latest scoops from the publishing industry

SITUATION NATION WITH 3 seasons of MTV hit reality show Jersey Shore under his belt, a slot on Dancing With the Stars and the release of his own work out video, Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino’s quest for world domination has taken a new step with the release of a self help book.

Here’s the Situation: A Guide to Creeping on Chicks, Avoiding Grenades, and Getting in Your

CULTURE LISTINGS

GTL on the Jersey Shore begins with a complete and detailed guide to GTL, which, according to The Situation, is ‘the bedrock of life itself ’. For those yet to be exposed to the Jersey Shore vocabulary, that’s gym, tanning and laundry - the standard pre-night out routine for any self respecting guido.

The rest of the book promises "battle plans for the club, a primer on grenades and wingmen, and tips for ridding yourself of all levels of clinger".

And, in a surprising move for a man who has had more sexual partners than Russell Brand, tips on how to find your life partner.

HEDWIG HOO-HA THE Indian Environment Minister Jairam Ramesh has spoken out against Harry Potter fans, blaming them for playing a role in the rapidly decreasing number of wild owls in India.

Speaking to mark the launch of a report on India’s owl population, which calls for tougher measures to protect owls ahead of Diwali, Ramesh claimed that "Following Harry Potter, there seems to be a strange fascination even among the urban middle classes for presenting their children with owls."

The report, however, appears to con-

clude that the dwindling owl population is down to the popular practice of sacrificing owls on auspicious occasions, not a deep love for Hedwig.

I'VE GOT 99 PROBLEMS BUT A MEMOIR AIN'T ONE

IN a high concept promotional stunt for Jay-Z’s hotly anticipated memoir, Decoded, every page of the novel has been hidden across New York City, allowing fans to go on a Jay-Z treasure hunt.

The team behind the project is creative agency Droga5, who were approached by Random House, Decoded’s publishers in a bid to create a book launch that fitted Jay-

Z’s level of fame.

The agency decided to creat an interactive location game by putting a page in every physical space that pertains to what he was talking about'. Players must log on to Jay-Z's website to solve the 10 or so clues that are released each day.

By the end of the first day of the project more than 100,000 fans had logged on.

A LUMP OF COLE FOR CHRISTMAS ebrity autobiographies...

W

George Osborne endures this years crop of cel

hen asked to picture a traditional selection of Christmas presents, the answer will undeniably change from generation to generation. And for our generation, thanks to the inexorable rise of the cult of celebrity over the last decade, those expensive hardbound volumes featuring our favourite celebrities, complete with big Hollywood smiles, airbrushed cheeks and piquant titles that they may or may not have conjured up themselves, have become an essential staple in the Christmas market.

So is this a bad thing? If executed properly then no, but that’s just the problem; the majority of these releases are rushed, patchy, insipid, and fall into three very predictable clichéd categories.

The first is reached by the logical thought process of “Well I’m famous now, a household name, the film/ album/tour was a commercial success, now where’s the next buck coming from?” Then; brainwave! Or more accurately, celebrity’s agent’s brainwave: “Autobiography!”

Rather than wait and see if their fame takes them anywhere worth writing about, they rush release a rather bland account of their journey to stardom.

Take Michael McIntyre’s recent release; Life & Laughing, a funny enough account of his rise to fame, but painstakingly average. Bright parents with showbiz connections, produce

equally bright, socially awkward son, who made it big when he realised that his agonizingly middle class background, which had he lived in his parent’s generation would have hindered his route to standup comedy, actually catalysed his. Predictable.

The second category contains a lot more emotional angst; it’s the “I’ve had an appalling year, and instead of forgetting about it over the festive period, I’ll write a book which basically re-hashes everything I’ve said for the past couple of months in my numerous exclusive interviews in the red tops.” Prime candidate this year; well who else but ‘The Nation’s Sweetheart’ Cheryl Cole. Fresh from chucking Ashley and battling Malaria, Cheryl returns in time for the Christmas market with Through My Eyes. A spectacularly photograph heavy documentation of the past year, it has been critically lampooned and savaged by plenty of fans too, for its lack of detail. But I have a hunch that this detail will be saved for the third and worst offender of celebrity autobiographies...

I am of course referring to the penny-pinching and completely unnecessary second autobiography. The aspect that really puts the contenders in this category to shame is the obscurely short amount of time that has

usually passed since the first one.

Take Russell Brand’s imaginatively titled Booky Wook 2. Now the first Booky Wook wasn’t actually that bad; drug addiction, sex addiction and a quite bizarre relationship with his father helped lift it out of the flat sea of dross autobiographies that are usually thrust upon us. But, in the same amount of pages used to explore his eclectic life story up until age 33, Booky Wook 2 is simply filled with the details of the past three years of his life. He’s stayed clean, he’s fallen in love with Katy Perry, and his life is dandy. That’s about it.

It has to be said though that Brand’s second book is a truly dense and compelling read when compared to Katie Price’s fourth autobiography in six years. Yes, you read that correctly. With the publication of You Only Live Once, (an ironic title when you consider she’s decided to write about it four times) Miss Price has surely produced the crème de la crème of this year’s staggeringly banal autobiographies.

So are there any good autobiographies at all this year?

Alan Sugar’s What You See Is What You Get is an interesting read, though I daresay that, when you consider the nature of his profession, a second will almost certainly see the light of day by the time you’ve read this article.

Then again, I hear Peter Andre has released a fascinating and absorbing... Hmm. Perhaps it’s best if you stick with a Terry’s Chocolate Orange and a pair of socks this year.

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RATED READS

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t. Lucy’s Home for Girls Raised by Wolves by Karen Russell is a collection of short stories, but not the typical kind. Each story is delirious and detailed, bubbling with peculiar ideas. With one tale following a family’s pilgrimage with their minotaur father, and another --- an alligator wrestler whose sister becomes possessed, Russell’s work allows the reader a window into another world entirely.

It is rare to come across a collection of short stories in which believable characters are so perfectly slotted into fantastical situa-

tions. And yet, as removed as these characters and their situations are, Russell engages the reader so we still empathise with their lives.

The titular story of the collection, in which werewolf children are taken into care and educated by nuns, is particularly apt in helping describe the effect these stories have. Russell builds a believable reality out of a fantastical situation as she describes the rules and difficulties of the weregirls’ new lives, examining those who find it easy to adapt, and those who do not. The reader can recognise themselves in such tales, and relate it to aspects of our own lives, and in this way the stories can be extremely rewarding.

Those who have little time for fancy will probably be dissatisfied by the macabre whimsy present throughout the book, but even then the writing is taut and leaves the reader hungry for more.

S

uite Française by Irène Némirovsky is a novel with an incredible history that is almost as stirring as the story it tells. Author Irène Némirovsky fled to Paris to escape the Russian Revolution and it was here that she wrote her first novel, ‘David Golder’.

However, in 1942, Némirovsky was deported under the regulations of the German occupation to Auschwitz and killed in the gas chambers, because of her Jewish descent and despite her conversion to Catholicism.

It wasn’t until fifty years later that her daughter discovered a notebook containing the

manuscript of ‘Suite Française’, a novel set in Nazi occupied France from June 1940-July 1941 which her mother had written in the same time period. It became an instant international bestseller, having been translated into thirty-eight languages.

The novel is split into two sections; the first telling the story of Parisians fleeing the Nazi invasion of the city whilst the second describes the inhabitants of a rural French village and how their lives are altered by the occupation. The multitude of characters leading very separate lives continuously overlap and illustrate how differently war can affect people. It is not, however, just a story of conflict and defeat; love, bravery and the sheer desperation to survive mix together to make this novel page-turning. Once you immerse yourself in this tale, it is almost impossible to drag yourself away.

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obody does dystopia quite like Margaret Atwood. And nowhere does she do it better than in The Handmaid's Tale.

Her research into the scientific and sociological issues dealt with in the book is so extensive that the plausibility of events is never in question. Atwood is not wrong in referring to her work as 'speculative fiction' rather than 'science fiction'.

SOPHIE STEIGER

TABI JOY

To Phili p Larkin

BOOK SHELF PORN!

THE BLUFFER'S GUIDE TEJA PISK gives you the lowdown on Philip Larkin...

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f you’ve ever experienced the uncomfortable silence that follows an elderly relative’s ridiculously non-PC comment on immigrants, homosexuals or gangsta rap take solace in the fact that Larkin’s parents were much, much worse. Larkin’s father owned a miniature statue of Hitler which he kept on the mantlepiece. At the push of the button it would perform a Nazi salute. Really.

They say that a poet’s surroundings influence his work.

Wordsworth had the Lake District. Larkin had Hull. Despite achieving great success with the publication of three volumes of poetry, Larkin spent most of his life working as the Librarian at Hull Univeristy.

To be fair, the grey, shipping dock surroundings of Hull did inspire a lot of Larkin’s poems. But that just may explain why his poems can be so depressing.

Larkin, by his own admission, was not much of a looker. He went bald in his 20s and wore very, very thick spectacles. In a characteristic

table failings of parents, it’s a good poem to read if you ever start feeling panicked about your biological clock. It’s not exactly the best representation of Larkin’s work though.

The intense lyricism that appears in poems like ‘The Old Fools’ and ‘Ambulances’ is not so present here.

If This Be The Verse is Larkin’s most quoted poem, then An Arundel Tomb is definitely his most mis-quoted. If anyone tries to tell you that Larkin was actually quite a positive guy after all because he wrote the words ‘What will survive of us is love’ then smack them.

What Larkin actually wrote was, ‘Our almost instinct, almost true / “Deprivation is for me what daf- What will survive of us fodils were to Wordsworth” is love’. That extra line makes a lot of difference. continued over two long term rela- And ruins every poorly researched tionships. obiturary in the Daily Mail ever.

With the memorable opening Philip Larkin died in 1985 at line, ‘They fuck you up, your Mum the age of 63 from cancer of the and Dad’, This Be The Verse has long oesophagus. Now, 25 years after his been established as Larkin most fa- death he remains one of England's mous poem. A darkly comic look at best loved poets. human reproduction and the inevi-

The Handmaid's Tale' is a heaving mixture of religious zeal, nuclear war, misogyny and totalitarianism. It follows the story of Offred, a Handmaid whose only purpose is to breed. After America is ravaged by pollution and sexual disease, it becomes Gilead, a repressive society with an invisible government, wherein women are the property of the state.

Extreme religion is used to wield power over the weak, while ethnic minorities, people with disabilities and homosexuals all vanish.

The novel is a powerful commentary on the damage that extremism can do, and does not try to claim that Western nations are exempt from such a risk. Though it was written over two decades ago, the message still powerfully resonates today, and the issues remain startlingly relevant.

http://bookshelfporn.com

display of confidence he once described himself as ‘an egg sculpted in lard, wearing goggles’. Despite nature's setbacks, Larkin had a quite a rich and mildly sordid love life, maintaining a 35 year affair with Monica Jones, an affair which

I

f you were ever in any doubts over Karl Largerfield's fierceness just check out his immense book collection. His books cover every wall of his studio, up two stories to the the skylight.

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The Great Escapes

Have you got the mid-term blues? Not been off campus in daylight for a while? Here are some exciting ideas for day trips to shake off the cobwebs! So, if you want a duck-free day, follow Louisa McLellan and Hannah Watters' advice...

Fountains Abbey and Studley Royal This location has over 800 acres of land to explore, the main attraction being the ruins of a Cistercian Abbey, Fountains, which is a stunning place to end up; running through the cloisters or hiding in the store rooms provides fun for everyone! However the grounds provide a lovely walk past a variety of temples and towers, giving you stunning views over the lakes and landscapes at every turnthe most stunning (in my opinion) being at Anne Boleyn’s Seat, about half way through the walk. You’ll also run into some deer along the way, which is a lovely sight! Perfect for a different day out, remember your camera and wear sensible shoes- the walk can be quite hilly!

Price: Adult £7.70 or free if you have a National Trust card.

How to get there: You can get the bus from Ripon town centre or it’s roughly an hour's drive along the A59.

Whitby

Castle Howard This is a truly beautiful day out - not only is the stately home absolutely stunning but the grounds are also perfect for a walk around. It was built between 1699 and 1712 by Sir John Vanbrugh, and is famed for being the home used in ‘Brideshead Revisited’.

Both the exterior and interior of the building is breathtaking; with the grand decor, beautiful William Morris wallpaper and the eclectic mix of paintings, sculpture and porcelain in already extravagant rooms is a fantastic sight! The outside is just as striking, with small temples and statues popping up over the landscape at every turn, as well a wide range of different gardens, and the odd peacock popping over to see you too!

Price: £10.50 Student ticket (trust usit is worth it!)

How to get there: Either a half hour drive down the A64, or a train or Coastliner bus to Malton and a taxi to Castle Howard- whichever route you take, look out for that first view up the drive way, truly spectacular!

We might be heading into another cold, dark winter but Whitby’s charm is a must, even if fish and chips on the beach is a bit bracing! The cobbled streets and picturesque ruins of Whitby Abbey are stunning. As the setting for the book ‘Dracula’, Whitby is the proud host of ‘Whitby Gothic Weekend’, a biannual weekend for which Goths from across the world migrate to Whitby, for events such as charity football matches and special markets.

Whitby has enough culture and things to do to make it an ideal destination with the parents but is also pretty and fun enough to be worth the train ticket and have a housemates' day out.

How to get there: About an hour's drive or get a train from York changing at Middlesbrough.

mer

s to Ben Rim

Photo belong

Yorkshire Sculpture Park Not just for sculpture-lovers, this park is brilliant for people who are craving a walk and the countryside, or those that just want photos of as many different ways to pose with sculptures as possible. My personal favourite sculpture is 'The Playground', a walkway which makes noises as you cross it; the sound of applause or jeers of football matches. Besides the more novel works, many famous sculptors are represented there; such as Hepworth, Frink and Moore with some of their best pieces.

Although slightly awkward for those reliant on public transport it is definitely worth it and the best place I have visited near York.

Price: FREE! How to get there: You can get the train from York to Wakefield Westgate, and then get a taxi (roughly £10), or a 50 minute drive down the A64.

Remember to Remember "Back" They ask me where I've been, And what I've done and seen.

But what can I reply Who know it wasn't I, But someone just like me, Who went across the sea And with my head and hands Killed men in foreign lands...

Though I must bear the blame, Because he bore my name

By Wilfred Gibson (1878-1962)

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n the 11th November, at 11am, there is a two minute silence to mark the end of the First World War, and to commemorate everyone lost in any war. The act of remembering serves not only as an act of respect for those who have fought, or are still fighting, but also tries to help us think about the ways in which we can appreciate our lives. At this time on 11th November 1918 the Armistice Agreement was signed, bringing an end to the four years of fighting that had preceded it. It started as Armistice Day, then after the Second World War, became Remembrance Day in respect of all other solders. On the second Sunday of November there is Remembrance Sunday, when the Cenotaph occurs at Whitechapel, where people lay wreaths at the base of a memorial.

The poppy is worn throughout November as another mark of respect, due to the fact poppies grew on the battle fields of France in the first war, when nothing else would.

After Moina Michael’s poem “We rial in the Minster Gardens to pay shall keep the faith”, written in No- your respects. However, the most vember 1918, the line ‘And now the important part is just rememberTorch and Poppy Red, We wear in ing to remember. Wear your poppy honor of our dead’ created the tradi- with pride and spare two minutes to tion of wearing these flowers. think about what sacrifices others If you want to take part in a Re- have made for us to have the oppormembrance Day in York there are tunities we have today. a number of ways you can do so. The Theatre Royal is hosting a Festival of Remembrance on Sunday 7th November which will include a variety of musical performances, while on Sunday 14th there will be a Remembrance Parade through town.

If you wanted to remember alone maybe take a trip to the York War Memorial, Minster Gardens York War Memo-

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ALL LIT UP Louisa McLellan tells us about this year's 'Illuminating York'...

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ast week, York City Centre Photo belongs to Merlyn Griffiths saw the return of Illuminating York, an annual event which sees a variety of light shows take over the city's landmarks. This year the Minster's south entrance was the main attraction. With a show designed by Ross Ashton and Karen Monid, crowds gathered transfixed throughout the evening.

With a mixture of Medieval biblical characters being projected along with Latin text, and flowers climbing the walls, there was something for everyone to appreciate. This show was accompanied by a soundtrack of speech and choral music which gave the show a haunting effect.

Within Dean's Park, or the Minster Gardens, was a selection of related events. There was 'LightWeight', which was a huge white lows members of the public to draw desphere which had projected images signs on a tablet, which then becomes of figures walking across it. This was part of the show projected up on to the a beautiful object to view in the darkbuilding. You see a mixture of chilness, as it had such a dream like state dren's scribbles and adult doodles aparound it. Dean's Park also housed two pearing on the side of the building, and indoor events, which took place within its constantly changing format means caravans or tents, with performance you never see the same show twice. events to small audiences.

I went to see this show on Wednesday The final show was a repeat from last with my housemates as well as a parent year's - 'Tagtool'. This interactive show and all of us left the show with a smile proved so successful that this year on our face. Illuminating York definiteit was put on again, this time at the ly has something for everyone, and if Treasurer's House, situated on the cobyou missed it this year, keep your eyes bled street behind the park. 'Tagtool' alpeeled for the show next year!

Read it to Believe it

CULTURE LISTINGS

YOURK ART

Return to the Front Victoria Railway Station

by Richard Jack, 1916. Displayed in York Art Gallery The poignancy of this scene stretches far beyond the First World War, which it depicts. The sombre faced man in the forefront sits alone at the station deep in thought, offering a sense of foreboding that is difficult to fully contemplate.

Despite the slow thoughtfulness of the figure, the throng of a bustling station prevails. This work stands as a representation of contemporary life and as a depiction of the fear and apprehension experienced in war.

The Culture editors bring you all the weird and wonderful news from the Art World...

PIG-ASSO Pennywell Farm in Bucksfastleigh has some inhabitants hogging the limelight. These trottered individuals are creating canvasses in aid of the Farm Crisis network. Farm owner, Chris Murray is keen to point out the pig’s preference to pointillism but we see a lot of similarity to HOG-arth.

erfect the p y. e is r tu g n ig -i da p a boar This ent to oinkm

PASSIONATE ABOUT ART A French woman has been fined after kissing a Cy Twombly work. She described herself as overcome with passion and describes it as testimony to the power of art. We didn’t know that’s what they meant by French kissing.

SEEING DOUBLE A man has been sent to jail for 16 months for selling forged works masquerading as original pieces by Tracey Emin. We can understand why he went to jail for forgery, we can’t understand why you would forge Tracey Emin’s work.

If you would like to see your work in this section please email us at culture@yorkvision.co.uk.

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EX CL US IV E PR IZ ES ON LY IN

ere at York Vision, we’re giving away a pair of tickets to Topman CTRL Live featuring The Mystery Jets, The Count & Sinden and Tribes at Fibbers in York on November 18th. The winner will also receive an exclusive limited edition T-shirt designed by The Count & Sinden that won’t be available to buy.

This month on Topman CTRL, The Mystery Jets, one of the UK’s favourite bands take over and reveal all. Find out what makes the band tick as they talk musical maps of the world from London to Thailand and much more. Check it all out now at www.topmanctrl.com Topman CTRL is an ongoing monthly series of gigs in which some of the most innovative and emerging musical talent take control of www.topmanctrl.com and reveal all the influences and inspiration that make up their musical DNA. They then choose the bands to play a CTRL live gig, in a different UK city each month. Check out www.topmanctrl.com for more info.

Simply log onto WWW.YORKVISION.CO.UK and answer the following question:

WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE MYSTERY JETS' LATEST ALBUM? a) Twenty One b) Serotonin c) Making Dens

PICKS OF THE WEEK T H U R S D AY 11

MONDAY 15

RETURN TO THE FORBIDDEN PLANET

Grand Opera House £19

Central Hall £9/£6 NUS

JEDWARD

T H U R S D AY 18 S AT U R D A Y 20

Everyone's favourite X Factor twin set, John and Edward, are set to play York's Opera House this coming Monday. Just how they ever made it, we'll never quite understand.. Perhaps it's the luck of the Irish..

If you're a fan of trashy sci-fi musicals loosely based on Shakespeare plays, this production is one not to miss. Running from 11-13, Happily Ever After society's winter offering is sure to have you dancing in the aisles along to 1950s rock n' roll hits.

WEDNESDAY 17 WONDERFUL TOWN Sir Jack Lyons Concert Hall £10/£3 NUS

Preceding West Side Story by four years, Wonderful Town is brimming with memorable songs that get under the skin. It's this year's Practical Project, performed by Music students across all years.

FRIDAY 19 POP GOES THE 80s Grand Opera House £19.50 Stars from London's West End perform classic 80s tracks such as 'Gold', 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' and 'Rio'. Don't miss this must see show.

Scene Editor Jaime Riley Music Editors Chris Craddock Rachel Pronger Deputy Music

MYSTERY JETS

Fibbers £6 As part of the Topman CTRL tour, Twickenham five piece Mystery Jets are playing Fibbers with support from The Count & Sinden and Tribes. Fans of skinny jeaned Londoners should form an orderly queue...

Scenesters

Stephen Barbagiannis

Will Haydon

YSTV'S CHILDREN IN NEED SHOW P/X/001 7PM

YSTV and RAG's charity show, featuring everything from live music to a race across Yorkshire, a Nouse/Vision danceoff to socs vs. sabbs. Come along to P/X/001 to have a great time and raise loads of money for a very worthy cause!

The doors open at 6.30pm for a 7.00pm start on November 20.

Film Editors David Elliott Tom Martin Deputy Film Chris Hogg Olivia Waring TV Editor Nicola Chapman Games Editor Nathan Blades Books Editors Tabi Joy Teja Pisk Culture Editors Louisa McLellan Hannah Wattes