A Woman's Selflessness

In Relation to Her Mission

By Oyinlola Bukky Akande

Selflessness is to forsake oneself for the benefit of another and by this act, legacies are built along the way.

It is very important to know that “Self”, is who we are as human beings, our ego, nature, and flesh. We can easily assume that our biggest enemy is Satan, but it is “SELF”. It is a lot easier to blame the devil and others than oneself. A selfish person relies on himself not God and will glorify himself but not God. Pride and selfishness produce strife and disharmony with God and people. The Bible makes us realise that selfish people have no thoughts of God.

The trait of wanting our own way is woven into the fabric of our fallen nature. We human beings can be persistently

selfish. Insisting on our own way is at the very heart of most of our conflict, and at the bottom of almost all the way humans abuse others. This lack of love is a source of much human heartache and suffering.

The Bible help us to understand that selfish acts cause strife Learning how to love is an antidote that cures it. A Selfless person looks not only to his own interest but also that of the others. 'Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.’ Philippians 2:4

For people will be lovers of self (narcissistic, self-focused), lovers of money (impelled by greed), boastful, arrogant, reviles, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy and profane, (and they will be) unloving (devoid of natural human affection, calloused and inhumane), irreconcilable, malicious gossips, devoid of self-control (intemperate, immoral), brutal, haters of good, traitors, reckless, conceited, lovers of (sensual) pleasure rather than lovers of God.

Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant.’ 2 Timothy 3:24 (AMP)

In the book of 1st Corinthians, the Bible makes us realise that Love is not Selfish, envious, nor prideful. It is known that selfish people seek only to satisfy their flesh. Selfishness and Love cannot coexist together for they are opposite. Selfishness can be infectious and likely will incite others to also be prideful and selfish. Having God in our lives will give us the power to not be enticed by selfish acts of others.

It is extremely important to know that Selfishness stinks in God ‘s nostrils just as it was expressed in the Book of Ezekiel. ‘But your beauty went to your head, and you became a common whore, grabbing anyone coming down the street and taking him into your bed. You took your fine dresses and made “tents” of them, using them as brothels in which you practiced your trade. This kind of thing should never happen, never. Ezekiel 16:15

Case Studies

Cain

Cain is an example of one who had no concern for others (Genesis 4). God rejected his sacrifice while accepting that of Abel, his brother. Cain, jealous of his brother and having no regard for anyone but self, murdered his brother. When God afterward asks him where Abel was, Cain said “Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Genesis 4:9). But according to the Bible we are supposed to be our “brother’s keepers.” We are to look out for the interests of others and to esteem others better than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). We must love one another (1 John 4:7). Cain’s selfishness caused him to hate his brother and kill him.

Examples of Selfless People:

These ones had proper perspective on self and others. In each example, the one who manifested selflessness was blessed by the God of heaven.

Abraham

When the flocks and herds of Abraham and Lot became too large for them to live at the same location, instead of telling his nephew where he could locate, Abraham, acting with regard for others before regard for self, told Lot to choose wherever he wanted to live. Facts tell us that he was older, Lot probably owed his wealth to him, and that God had said all the land was his, Abraham could have rationalized that and insisted he should make the choice. Instead, he selflessly deferred to Lot. Because of it, Abraham was greatly blessed. (Genesis 13)

Joseph

Even though his brothers had sold him into slavery, when they came to Egypt seeking food, he forgave them and then helped them. If he had been selfish, he could have demanded his brothers be punished.

The Good Samaritan

Unlike those who were outwardly pious, he took the time to help a person in need using his own resources and time to gain no advantage for self but only to help a person who needed help. (Luke 10)

Barnabas

He saw the needs of his brethren, so he sold his land, gave all the money to the Lord’s cause so that those in need might have relief. (Acts 4)

Paul

Paul selflessly gave himself to the Lord setting an example for all those who would be the kind of disciples the Lord wants. Apostle Paul said he was no longer living, but that Christ was living in him. This meant that he had selflessly given control of his life over to Christ and became obedient to Jesus in all things. We can, and must, do the same.

He asks us to walk in his footsteps and follow his example of good character. If we are truly living a life of faith, we will also strive to build good Christian character: One who exercises proper self-control is one who brings every thought and action into conformity with the will of God. (2 Peter 1:6) One denies self by esteeming others better than self and humbling oneself before God we must remember that our choices affect our self-esteem. (1 Peter 5:6)

Self-control

God wants us to be the best we can be, we need to be more like him in our actions and words. Putting self to death is a continuous habit. (Galatians 2:20)

Jesus, The Son of God selflessly left heaven and came to this world to give Himself as a sacrifice for man’s sins. He had no selfish motives in His actions. (Phil. 2:1-8

Putting self to death is the total cure to selfishness

Self-denial and low Self-esteem are never the same. The people with low selfesteem feel poorly about themselves and are convinced that they are inferior to others.

Self-Sacrifice

Christians are to be “living sacrifices” unto God, living each day to accomplish the good works for which they were created so that the Father and Son might be glorified in them. When it comes to sin, who is our biggest. (2 Corinthians 8:5; Romans. 12:1-2)

Lesson

I learnt that Love is many things but is not self-centred. The Lord Jesus Christ the Son of God selflessly left heaven and came to this world to give himself as a sacrifice for humanity and there were no selfish motives in his actions.

Oyinlola Bukky Akande, is a LifeCoach, Speaker, Author, Publisher, Opportunity Broker, Bridge Builder and Event Co-ordinator. She has served in the Retail & Sales industry and her experience spans over 25 years’. OBA's lengthy experience and refined interpersonal skills have made her a customer service expert.

She has authored two books titled 'Diary of the Unique Woman’ & The Life Wires Coupons. OBA has also co-authored and published two books titled ‘Unique Insights’ & ‘Unique Foresight's’. She is the President of Unique Women International and runs a women's only mentor-ship group called Unique Legacy. The heart of Unique Legacy is to aid the development of ideas of women, young women and connect them with professionals in their industry or field. Co - Founder of Rapha Nurturing Academy. OBA is a Certified CBT Trainer; she holds a BSc. in Events Management.

Co-Pastor of Shalom Church. She is married to Kenny Akande, Head Pastor and they are blessed with children.