Lifestyle and Wellness Coaching Guide by Jasmine Ibrahim

THE 33-DAY ACTION PLAN TO UPSPIRAL YOUR LIFE

Get from where you are today… To where you really want to be

Your relationships, finances, career, goals, personal development, inner growth, and spiritual journey all unfold on the spiral.

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The Possibility of Today by Sibyl Chavis

TABLE OF CONTENTS PART ONE: PERSPECTIVE The Spiral of Life........06 Your Extraordinary Side & The Journey Up the Spiral........10 How Your Life Is Unfolding on the Spiral........14 The Frontside of the Spiral........16 The Backside of the Spiral........18

Three Different Phases We Experience as we Upspiral........20 Challenges that Can Arise as we Move Up the Spiral........24 Summing it all up: A Quick Review........29

PART TWO: THE “HOW” : YOUR 33-DAY ACTION PLAN Mapping Your Spiral........31 Daily Action Plan........36 Getting Your 3s (One of the Best Parts About Upspiraling)........38

PART THREE: REFERENCE SHEETS Quick Reference Sheets........42

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PART ONE: PERSPECTIVE

It’s so much easier to get where you want to be in life when we understand the path we’re traveling, we can see the right opportunities, and we know how to best align with the day in front of us. There’s no need to spin our wheels and feel like we’re stuck on the “hamster wheel of life.” There’s no need to stress or have worries that things aren’t falling into place the way we need them to. There’s no need to question ourselves or give up on anything we feel deep down is right for us. Why? Because once we understand that our life is always unfolding along a spiral path (The Spiral of Life), it’s like turning on the light in a dark room. You can see everything so much clearer. The events in your life and what you’ve gone through make way more sense. You’re able to see the bigger picture and understand how the ups and downs are stretching us for a reason and creating important shifts in your life. Most importantly, it becomes clear what we’re meant to do each day to move forward in order to align with what’s most important to you and the good things that are meant to unfold in your life. That’s what this 33 Day Action Plan is all about. You’ll find everything you need to align your days, your mindset, and your next steps forward so you can move up your spiral of life. It’s time to upspiral!

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You may have thought your life would look like this: SUCCESS

START

SUCCESS

However, everything changes when we realize the journey in life actually looks like this:

IT’S AN UPWARD SPIRAL

START

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Chapter 1

THE SPIRAL OF LIFE WHAT IT MEANS TO “UPSPIRAL” Similar to many people, you may have a pretty good idea of what you want for your life. A happy and healthy relationship? A great career or a successful business? Meaning and purpose? Financial success? However, have all the things you can feel deep down are right for you already fallen into place? If not, then you’re probably like many of us and doing your best to move forward each day and accomplish what’s most important to you. Along the way you possibly have encountered some challenges or setbacks? We all do at some point. There are so many things that happen to us as we make our way through the journey of life. Now, imagine your life today and all that has happened in the past is unfolding as you make your way up a winding path that looks like the picture on this page. It’s an upward spiral. It’s called The Spiral of Life.

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ARE YOU MOVING UP THE SPIRAL OF LIFE TODAY? Today, you are making your way through life and you’re at some point on this spiral path. Depending on what’s going on in your life right now, you’re moving through one of the 3 big phases: Building, Strengthening or the Momentum phase. Each day you’re doing a lot and ideally making progress by taking steps in the right direction. When you’ve taken enough steps forward, you’ll reach another loop of the spiral, it ‘turns’ and you keep going, taking step after step forward and making your way up the Spiral of Life. Day by day, and year by year, you’re making your way through life and moving toward the top of the spiral. This is what it means to move up your spiral of Life and upspiral. And here’s the KEY: Even when you’re on the backside of the spiral, you’re still moving upward. All those times you’ve been worried, or confused or had doubts because something was going wrong, or not falling into place…you were just on the backside of the Spiral. As long as you keep taking steps forward, you’ll hit a frontside again.

THE MOST IMPORTANT AREAS OF OUR LIVES UNFOLD ON THE SPIRAL The Spiral of Life informs the most important aspects of our lives. Your relationships unfold on the spiral, your finances, your career, your goals, your personal development, your inner growth and even your spiritual journey (if that’s something you’re into). Each area of our life develops along an upward spiral path. It also became very clear that once we’re aware of that path, we can figure out what’s most important to us and take the right steps forward to move up the spiral and reach them. In other words, all those times you’ve heard people say that there’s a path to what’s most important to you…they’re right. Most importantly, when we upspiral, we really get in tune with who we are deep down, our true self. Why? Because when we upspiral not only are we successfully making progress, we’re also aligning with our higher self, or as I like to describe it, learning how to let our Extraordinary Side lead the way. Your Extraordinary Side is the part of you that has been urging you toward everything that’s truly right for you and it will absolutely guide you there. We just have to be willing to tune in, listen and take steps forward to move up the spiral.

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HOW WE CAN USE THE SPIRAL TO MAKE PROGRESS IN OUR LIVES I’m sure you can imagine what I did after I discovered that we can use the spiral and create what feels right for us deep down…I put upspiraling to the test. How? I took one of the biggest leaps of faith and quit my job as an attorney so I could find my way to the work and career I felt deep down was right for me, but never had the guts to go after. It worked! It’s been over a decade since I quit my job and found my way to the meaningful and fulfilling work my Extraordinary Side had always been leading me toward. I’ll be sharing more about that and how you can also apply the spiral to your life and whatever is really important to you. But, the greatest thing about the spiral is that you don’t have to take my word for it. As you make your way through these pages and the action plan, you’ll see how the Spiral of Life and the recurring pattern has always been at play and is unfolding in your life right now. It will also be very clear how you can use the Spiral of Life moving forward and apply it to your job, your goals, your career, your business, your relationship or any other area of your life where you’re looking for any improvement, development, accelerated growth, or success.

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IS UPSPIRALING FOR YOU? Upspiraling is not for everyone. If you’re not feeling ready and open to dive into the outer work and inner work, break any patterns, bad habits, or work through any of the other “stuff of life” that’s been getting in the way…then this is a good time to stop reading this action plan. In order to upsiral, we’ve got to do the work. There are days I’ve personally had on this journey that I’ve wished were easier. And, after watching and working with hundreds of other people as they made the way up their own spirals, there have been days when I wished it was easier for them too. I used to wish there was a magic wand I could wave and voila, just like that, everything would shift and fall into place. But there’s not. I’ve also realized that we actually wouldn’t want that to happen because a real gift happens in our lives every single time we dig deep, align with our Extraordinary Side, and move up another phase of the spiral. If you commit to upspiraling and stick with it, life will continually unfold in a beautiful and successful way. You’ll have a peaceful mind, continually find meaning and purpose, and accomplish what’s most important to you and that you’re meant to bring into the world. But, I think it’s also really important to share the depth of this journey with everyone upfront so anyone that’s not ready or willing can stop reading right now.

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Chapter 2

YOUR EXTRAORDINARY SIDE & THE JOURNEY UP THE SPIRAL

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WHAT’S REALLY BEEN GOING ON IN LIFE Think back to a time in your life when you ran into a major challenge or maybe something didn’t work out the way you wanted. You were making your way around the spiral and hit one of those times in life when you’re on the backside. Although it may have been hard to see at the time, when we look back now, we may be able to see that the challenges or issues that came up were actually there to help us discover more about who we really are deep down. You know those times in our life that push us to dig deep? Maybe something goes wrong with our relationship? Or, we run into a big financial challenge and don’t have enough money to fix it. Or, maybe something goes wrong with our work? our health? our business? Even though these times can be really hard, have you noticed that once you push through them, something inside of you grows? You feel stronger and maybe even wiser and more confident because you pushed through.

That’s your Extraordinary Side. Even though you might have felt distraught, or frustrated and worn down, your Extraordinary Side lifted you back up. The inner strength and intuition of your Extraordinary Side was guiding you through the challenge.

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OUR EXTRAORDINARY SIDE VS. OUR ORDINARY SIDE Throughout history, the Extraordinary Side and the ordinary side have gone by many other different names. In Buddhism, common terms are the ‘small self’ and the ‘large self. Others have described it as our higher self, which is loving, wise, and the voice that whispers and guides us toward our best decisions; versus our lower self, which acts before it thinks, and houses our fears, doubts, anger, jealousy, judgment, etc. Our lives are full of both Extraordinary side and ordinary side instincts. The question becomes which are we going to listen to? Which side are you going to allow to be the dominant force in your life? To use my own life as an example, in the past, my problem was that I wasn’t listening to my Extraordinary Side nearly enough or letting it lead the way. The longer I continued to ignore it, the wider the gap between the life I had settled into living and the life that was calling to me grew. As a result, I wasn’t using my days as effectively to upspiral. Instead, my ordinary side worked very hard to keep me running on the hamster wheel of life. It constantly whispered to me to Play it safe. Be responsible. Be realistic. There is nothing more. You’re just dreaming. Does any of this sound familiar to you? If so, then know you’re not the only one.

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ALLOWING OUR EXTRAORDINARY SIDE TO LEAD THE WAY Living with your Extraordinary Side in the driver’s seat is not about obsessing and trying to go through every day “being perfect.” It’s not about searching for some state of being we have to miraculously acquire somehow. It’s a capacity that already exists within you. It’s about settling into who you really are and doing the best you can to allow your true self to naturally flow out into what you think, say, and do. The amazing thing is that we can actually feel the presence of our Extraordinary Side. Your Extraordinary Side has a palpable presence—it’s a presence within you that you can tune into at any time that can positively influence everything you do. When our Extraordinary Side is in the driver’s seat, we feel full of ease, kindness, generosity, patience, open-mindedness, love and connectedness (the list goes on and on). Physically, our body will feel relaxed and we continually take restful, deep breaths. There is literally a place of calm and stillness you can rest in and there’s an overwhelming sense that everything is unfolding just as it is meant to. From this place, the qualities of our Extraordinary Side flow naturally and easily. It positively impacts the way you experience everything (including, of course, your journey up the Spiral). We’ll be talking about a specific daily practice and routine that allows us to continually allow our Extraordinary Side to lead the way. But first, it’s important to understand more about those times in life when you’re on the frontside vs. the backside of the spiral.

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Chapter 3

NTS

SID ES

FRO

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IDES

HOW YOUR LIFE IS UNFOLDING ON THE SPIRAL

The Possibility of Today by Sibyl Chavis

You’ll notice there are both frontsides and backsides on the spiral. As we make our way up the spiral of life, we have those times in life when we’re on the frontside of the spiral and also times when we’re on the backside of the spiral. Some people describe it as the good times and bad times, or the ups and downs of life. But, there’s a bit more going on which is why it’s helpful to see the spiral path and unpack what’s really happening. WHEN LIFE IS GOING SMOOTHLY When you’re on the frontside of the Spiral, these are the times in your life when it feels like you’re truly making progress. Think back to a really good time in your life. Maybe you just got a big promotion at work? Or accomplished something you really wanted? Or your relationship with your significant other is going really well. You were most likely feeling good, inspired and were happy with the way things were happening and falling into place. Life was going smoothly. These times feel great, don’t they?

YOU’RE STILL MOVING FORWARD (EVEN WHEN SOMETHING GOES “WRONG”) However, when your life journey turned and pushed around the backside of the spiral, maybe something went wrong? Or an unexpected challenge came up? Or, maybe you failed at something? Those times often don’t feel as good. In fact, many of us interpret those times in life as problematic. We may even get discouraged, feel defeated, worried, or question ourselves. Has that ever happened to you? If so, you’re not alone. But, let’s take a closer look at what was really happening all those times we thought things were going “wrong.” Look at the rings of the Spiral--whether you’re at a point in life where you’re moving around a frontside of the spiral or making your way around the backside, the overall motion is up. As long as you keep learning your lessons and taking steps forward, you’re moving toward the top of the spiral (even during those times when you’re running into problems after problems or challenges on the backside of the spiral).

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LET’S TAKE A CLOSER LOOK AT THOSE TIMES IN LIFE WHEN YOU’RE ON THE FRONTSIDE OF THE SPIRAL

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MOVING AROUND THE FRONTSIDE OF THE SPIRAL There’s a list of so many different experiences and feelings you encounter each time you move around another frontside loop of the spiral. We’ve all had these times in our lives (whether or not we realized at the time that we were moving up the Spiral of life). Here’s a list below of some of the experiences. Later on, we’ll be getting into how to really take advantage of these times in life when we’re on the frontside of the spiral. These are the times in life we can make tons of progress. But, first it’s good to become really familiar with the patterns and experiences that come up so you can really take advantage of these times every time you hit one of these frontside periods in life.

THE PATTERNS AND EXPERIENCES WHEN YOU’RE ON THE FRONTSIDE OF THE SPIRAL OF LIFE Good Results Appear Certain things you’ve been working to make happen start falling into place. Positive Emotions Energized, inspired and feeling good about how things are going. Life is flowing. Insights Appear Great ideas and new discoveries surface in your mind. You’ll get more answers and your best next steps are clear. Signs Show Up As long as you’re open to seeing them and paying attention, you’ll get signs and confirmation that you’re moving in the right direction. People will say certain things that reassure you or you’ll notice other signs around you. New Possibilities Arise More opportunities arise. New allies show up that can help you make more progress and steps forward.

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NOW, LET’S TAKE A CLOSER LOOK AT THOSE TIMES IN LIFE WHEN YOU’RE ON THE BACKSIDE OF THE SPIRAL

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MOVING AROUND THE BACKSIDE OF THE SPIRAL The backside of the spiral is a very different experience from the frontside. When life turns and we’re asked to push around the backside of the spiral, this is when challenges tend to arise that can trigger all our doubts, fears and worries. It can feel like you just got punched in the gut or that life has just thrown you a curveball. However, when we’re aware of the bigger picture and know how to upspiral, we’re able to stay grounded and remind ourselves that these times on the backside of the spiral are leading us exactly where we need to be. Although the backsides of the spiral can really push us and feel heavy, they are the times when you learn the most about yourself and discover important insights about your best path forward. You’re being strengthened and directed to all the inner wisdom and strength you need to move forward even better in life. We’ll be going through one of my favorite tools to use when it’s time to navigate around those backside times in life, but first here’s a quick snapshot of what you might experience.

THE PATTERNS AND EXPERIENCES WHEN YOU’RE ON THE BACKSIDE OF THE SPIRAL OF LIFE Challenges arise

Obstacles and challenges appear in your life. It might feel like too many things are going “wrong” or life will throw you a curveball.

Strengthening and preparation opportunity

This is a time for significant inner growth and alignment. Although it can be hard to see at the time, life is working us for a reason and strengthening our inner resolve. We’re being prepared for the next upward shift in our life.

Slower “outer world” progress

The progress you make in the outer world tends to slow down a little because what you need most at these backside times is inner growth. As a result, life may feel a little more “bumpy” and things aren’t falling into place like they do when you’re on the frontside of the spiral.

Lessons and insights appear

You’re being pointed in the right direction and to lessons and new ways of living that you’ll want to integrate into your next steps. As long as you’re willing to see it, you’ll be reminded of the bigger picture and what’s really going on in your life.

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Chapter 4

THE 3 DIFFERENT PHASES WE EXPERIENCE AS WE UPSPIRAL

HOW THE DIFFERENT PHASES WORK As we’ve been talking about, life is unfolding as we make our way up and around the spiral and through 3 phases: building, strengthening and the momentum phase. Each phase comes with its own unique experiences and benefits and after we move through all 3, we’ve completed one complete cycle of the Spiral of Life. As we finish one cycle, another begins. It’s like that timeless wisdom you’ve probably heard before reminds us…with every ending comes a new beginning. You’ll go through these 3 different phases over and over again as you accomplish more in your life. You’ll also experience growth in your inner world and your outer world as you make your way up each spiral. Life shifts, rearranges and improves in the best way when we upspiral because we’re learning, growing and accomplishing those things that are most important to us.

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SUCCESS SUCCESS

Phase 3: Momentum

Positive results, more wins, life is flowing. What you’ve been working on and focusing on falls into place. Aligning with your wisdom, power, and the success you’ve been hoping for.

Phase 2: Strengthening

Learning and growing into who you really are deep down. A time for significant inner growth and laying the essential foundation for what you want to fall into place.

Phase 1: Building

A time of new beginnings. Sharpening your vision for what’s next in your life and setting forces in motion that will support your journey up the spiral.

START START

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THE THREE PHASES IN DEPTH PHASE 3: MOMENTUM - THE TOP OF THE SPIRAL During this final phase up the spiral, you’re aligned deeply with your wisdom and strength. You’re able to bring both into your days and whatever it is you’re working to accomplish. Life is flowing and you feel really good about it. There still might be those days when waves of doubts and fears arise, but you’re also experiencing the benefits that stem from all the inner work you’ve done during the strengthening phase. Your mindset is healthier. The mental chatter and Chief negativity officer in your mind have quieted down. You know how to tune in and manage your emotional waves so your confidence shines through. You’ve also reached the point in the journey where you’ve made it across the abyss. Life is changing, shifting, and rearranging in all the ways you need it to. More of what you’ve wanted for your life is finally showing and many of the things you’ve been working on begin to fall into place. It’s also at this point where the next upward shift in your life happens. You deepen more into your true self and feel the impulse to further align with your life’s purpose. You have made your way up to the top of this spiral you’ve been climbing and it’s time for the next one. You’ll have clarity and feel inspired to figure out what’s most right for you next.

PHASE 2: STRENGTHENING - THE MIDDLE OF THE SPIRAL During this middle phase of the spiral, we’re being asked to commit to deep inner growth and letting our Extraordinary Side lead the way. Although we’re really focused on our inner work, the benefits and growth that results creates the essential foundation for the outer world results we’ve been hoping for. The experiences that surface during this phase will help us strengthen our inner resolve and grow more into who we really are. You know how people say, it’s those times in life when we’re pushed that we grow the most? Well, nothing could be truer and this phase gives us the opportunity to get stronger, aligned with our Extraordinary Side and prepared for all the good things that are meant to happen in our lives. Now, you know I keep it real, so I’m not going to pretend like this phase is a cakewalk. There may be times during this part of your journey when it feels like you’re confused and lost in the middle of a very big forest that you’ll never find your way out. But, there is always a way through and deep down you know there’s no turning back anyway. The best way out is working through “our stuff” and moving up the spiral (we’ll be getting into exactly how you do that a little later). Although this phase of the journey can get difficult at times, it is also one of the most profound and valuable phases of the journey. It’s when we learn even more how to allow our Extraordinary Side to lead the way. This phase builds and strengthens the foundation for everything important in your life.

PHASE 1: BUILDING - THE BEGINNING OF THE SPIRAL This is a time often referred to as a “new beginning” or your “next chapter”. It’s a time of change and usually arises after something has shifted in your life and it’s time to focus on what’s next. At the beginning of this phase, one of the best things you can do is set a vision for what you want to see in this next chapter of your life. What do you want to shift, improve or grow in your life? What feels right? What direction are you being pointed in? By deciding what’s next, you set forces in motion that will be your metaphorical tail wind so you can take lots of steps and make a lot of progress. This is also the time when we want to start working on breaking any bad habits or learned behaviors that aren’t serving us or getting in the way (i.e. procrastination, resistance, negative thinking, etc.). It’s a time to do the work, eliminate any excuses and avoid falling into the trap of complacency, or “good enough.” It’s time to go!

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SOME OF THE DIFFERENT SPIRALS WE CAN CHOOSE TO MOVE UP

Over the course of our lives, we can choose to move up many different spirals. The ability to grow every area of our life is an ongoing opportunity. As an example, your relationship, your career, your finances, your mental wellbeing, and your relationships with family and friends will continually improve when you choose to climb different spirals in those areas of your life.

ari

& ges n e l l Cha rowth G

Reali z

With each journey, we learn more about ourselves and we experience benefits in both our inner world and outer world. Our inner capacities, our wisdom, intuition and inner strength all grow.

ation

nges & Challe th Grow

New S

kills

es Challeng

& Growt

Small & Big Challenges

Wins

& Growth

We eventually reach the point where we’ve mastered the art of upspiraling. We’re aligned with our purpose in life and will choose to climb higher spirals so we can deepen fully into our true self and bring our unique talents to everything we do and the world around us. Your life dreams and goals Relationship/ significant other Your Work/Career Relationships: Your family and Friends

Insights

Your finances

rowth

Challenges & G

Making Progress

Your Mental Wellbeing and Spiritual Journey

wth

Challenges & Gro

Inspired

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Chapter 5

THE CHALLENGES THAT CAN ARISE AS WE MOVE UP THE SPIRAL INFINITE LOOP & REVERSE SPIRAL Sometimes our own actions (i.e. procrastination, doubting ourselves, reacting to situations with anger, fear, focusing on the negative, etc.) are one of the main reasons for the challenges we can find ourselves facing. When we continually repeat these patterns, we may find we have fallen into a trap where we’re engaged in behaviors that are causing us to spin our wheels, or a cycle where we repeat the same mistakes that prevent our progress. The challenges are pointing us to make internal mindset shifts because in order to make progress up the spiral we will need to do things differently than we have been. There are two specific patterns to be aware of: Infinite Loops and Reverse Spirals. It’s important to understand both of these patterns because, believe it or not, just about all of us have been caught up in one or will be at some point in our life.

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INFINITE LOOP

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REVERSE SPIRAL

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BREAKING OUT OF INFINITE LOOPS An Infinite Loop is when we’re “stuck” or we find the same patterns or problems keep coming up in our lives. But, for whatever reason, instead of reevaluating our actions and choosing a new path, we end up repeating the same mistakes that keep us spinning. We’re stuck in an Infinite Loop and can’t make real progress or move up the spiral. To use my life as an example, in the years when I was unhappy at my job, unfulfilled, and knew I was on the ‘hamster wheel,’ I had fear about changing things up. I accepted my situation as ‘just the way it is,’ complained a lot, and secretly hoped that somehow everything would be different one day. But, I allowed myself to stay at that job and trapped in an Infinite Loop. Some other common examples that are usually signs we might be caught in an Infinite Loop: • Overspending or not budgeting and having the same money problems • Complaining about a situation but not doing everything we can to change it • Procrastination and self-sabotage • Staying in an unhealthy relationship and not doing the work to align with our best path forward • Allowing our fears to influence the choices and decisions we make • Not going after what we know deep down is right for us because of doubts

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REVERSE SPIRAL AND SELF-SABOTAGE

A Reverse Spiral is when we’re making progress, but then we begin to make multiple poor decisions that work against us. Our progress comes to a halt and we begin to spin back down the wrong way. We start reverse spiraling and going the wrong way down the spiral. If we get caught in a Reverse Spiral, it’s impossible to turn things around and start upspiraling again until we make some significant changes to the way we’re going about things. In other words, it is a serious case of self-sabotage.

TURNING THINGS AROUND WHEN YOU UPSPIRAL Here’s an extreme example. Jason was an entrepreneur I knew who worked diligently, made great decisions, and carefully worked up his spiral step-by-step to build his company. In several years he created an amazingly successful business that was thriving. He then had a yearlong marital affair, became consumed by the intensity of the situation—the constant covering up, the negativity it caused between him and his wife, and guilt. He wasn’t doing any inner work and was distracted from his work and business. He made one terrible decision after another and ended up Reverse Spiraling and lost everything. The company went under, and he became depressed and stuck at the bottom of his Spiral. However, it’s never too late to change our actions and behavior. In fact, that’s exactly what we want to do as quickly as possible when we realize we have veered off course. There’s a way out of every Infinite Loop and Reverse Spiral. That’s what Jason is currently doing and step by step he is rebuilding, healing and repairing his business and relationship with his wife and kids.

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PUTTING A STOP TO ANY INFINITE LOOPS OR REVERSE SPIRALS If you’re currently caught up in an Infinite Loop or Reverse Spiral today, I know that might not be easy to hear. But, you’re not alone. Many of us have had really hard times in life we needed to work through. In fact, when I think about my life and those times in the past when I was in an Infinite Loop, I can see how important it was for me to get the right lessons and break free from patterns that would have forever held me back.

There are always lessons and a need for us to do our inner work when we find ourselves in these situations. Once you learn your lessons, grow, and integrate more wisdom into your actions, you will have the power to break free from the Infinite Loop or turn around the Reverse Spiral. We’re the only ones with the power to set ourselves free. You’ve got to be honest with yourself and figure out what is keeping you stuck. Then develop a plan to do things differently. What’s working? What hasn’t been working? What needs to change? Ultimately, it is a change in you that will help you break free from the Infinite Loop. We’ll be going through the specific ways you can break out of any Infinite Loop in the Self-Audit and action plan section a little later on.

INFINITE LOOP

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REVERSE SPIRAL

The Possibility of Today by Sibyl Chavis

MOVING UP THE SPIRAL As we’ve been talking about, one thing we want to ensure is that we’re moving up the Spiral of Life. No matter who you are, what you’re doing, or what you’re going through, today, just like the rest of us, you’re somewhere on the Spiral of Life. Are you on the early part of the journey? Or, maybe you’re working your way through a later phase? Is this a time in life where you’re on the frontside and everything is falling into place? Or, maybe you’re working through a challenge and making your way around one of those times when you’re on the backsides of the spiral? Whatever the case may be, you’re somewhere on the spiral and it just helps to be aware of the process. It helps you keep everything that’s happening in your life in perspective (especially when challenges arise) and also take continual steps toward what’s most important to you in life.

SUMMING IT ALL UP: A QUICK REVIEW

Now, there’s no need to obsess about exactly where you are on the spiral. It’s just about having a general idea, knowing what phase you’re working through, and if you’re on the frontside or the backside. Ultimately, what matters most is how you move through the day. Are you using each day to upspiral? That’s what we’ll be setting you up to do in this section. But first, let’s quickly review 7 Key Insights about our lives now that we know it’s unfolding on an upward spiral path.

7 IMPORTANT INSIGHTS ABOUT LIFE AND UPSPIRALING

Life is about letting our Extraordinary Side lead the way and moving up the spiral. Our life and everything we experience unfolds as we make our way up the spiral of life. One of the main benefits of upspiraling is our growth. Our inner growth is the foundation for everything, including the outer success and positive results that show up in our lives.

When you’re on the frontside, it’s time to go and make things happen! When you’re moving through one of those times in life and things are falling into place and flowing well, you’re on the frontside of the spiral. It’s time to go! These are the times to take lots of steps forward and make lots of things happen.

When you’re on the backside, you’re still moving forward in life (even if it doesn’t feel like it). We have times in life when we reach the backside of the spiral. It’s important to remember that these times are extremely valuable times for inner growth and serve an important purpose in our lives. Similar to day and night, or yin and yang, the frontside and backside times in our lives are complementary forces that work together. Both are essential to our growth and success.

The Beginning Phase: This is a time of new beginnings and a time when we want to set a vision for what’s next in your life. It’s also a time to eliminate any excuses or fall into the trap of complacency, or “good enough.” It’s time to get moving.

The Strengthening Phase: During this middle phase of the spiral, we’re being asked to commit and devote ourselves to deep inner growth. The experiences that surface during this phase help us strengthen our inner resolve and grow more into who we really are.

The Momentum Phase: During this final phase up the spiral, you’re aligned deeply with your wisdom and strength. You’re able to bring both into your days and whatever it is you’re working to accomplish. Life is flowing and you feel really good about it.

Watch out for Infinite Loops and Reverse Spirals. Two patterns that we fall into, either consciously or unconsciously— that cause us to spin our wheels and make no progress or downspiral.

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 29

PART TWO: THE “HOW” Many people have “To do” lists they look at every day and their goal is to try to get through as many things on the list as possible. But, your ideal daily action plan works differently. It includes 3 important sections and helps structure our day so we can align what we’re doing with the most important things that come up each day in real-time (your inner work and outer work). It’s important to have a plan in writing that we can quickly look at each day and use to track our progress. It gives us a system that organizes us, aligns our days, and ensures we’re not spinning our wheels or not making all the progress we can during the day. Also, when you write down your plan for the day, it helps get rid of any of the stuff that can normally spin around in our minds every day and get in the way. You know, those little thoughts that just pop up…”I need to remember to make sure that bill gets paid today” or ``Don’t forget to run that errand or “Crap, I forgot to call her back yesterday and I definitely need to call her today.” You might be surprised at how much mental burn and churn that causes in our minds and even more surprised at how much more productive and at peace we are when those thoughts aren’t bouncing around creating noise and static. This helps ensure that we’re doing what matters most and making progress to move up our spiral. It’s virtually impossible to follow your plan, do the work, and not climb spiral after spiral and get to where you’re meant to be. We’re going to build the pieces and your 33 Day Action plan together. After we’re done, you’ll have your 3-page Daily action plan that you’ll be able to quickly review and track your progress with.

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CREATING YOUR 33 DAY ACTION PLAN Can You Accomplish Everything Important to you in 33 Days? Most likely not. Over the next 33 days, what you can count on is making significant progress and taking a quantum leap forward. You’ll also be creating the best habits and laying down the essential foundation that allows you to continually accomplish what’s most important to you in your life. But, since today you may be just starting out on new spirals or climbing a spiral that takes longer than 33 days to climb, I want you to know what you’re getting into. When we learn how to upspiral, we are able to align our lives so they’re flowing and we’re continually growing into more success and accomplishing whatever is most important to us. Using myself as an example, I can definitively say that upspiraling has improved every single thing in my life–it helped me align with my purpose, find meaning and success with my work, build and continually strengthen my relationship with my husband, my kids, my mom, my dad, my sister, achieve my financial goals, health goals, fitness goals, and make continual progress on my spiritual journey. Our goal is to create the best habits for you that will keep you aligned with the Upspiral journey. You’ll be able to rely on these habits to move through each of the 3 phases, navigate around those times when you’re on the frontside and times when you’re on the backside of the spiral, and then reach that point at the top where all your hard work pays off. This is when your inner growth from the journey really settles in, life shifts, and what you’ve been working for falls into place. That’s where this 33-day action plan comes into play because it’s been proven by different scientists, doctors and researchers that it takes around 30 days to create a good habit. This plan is based on 33 days just to make sure we’ve really sealed in those good habits. Also, I’ve always focused on upspiraling in chunks of 33 days and it works well. I then take a little break (usually a week) and dive right back into my upspiral routine and action plan. Let’s start building your action plan. It will include the following pieces: • A Map of Your Spiral of Life that you’ll continually be able to update • Your Daily Upsprial Routine and Action Plan • Your Daily Scorecard to help you track your progress I’ve also included 3 checklists that I put together for easy and quick reference. When you’re navigating around the spiral, there are times when it helps to get a quick refresher in case you want to refocus or need to quiet down the inner critic, or Chief Negativity Officer in our mind, that can get loud during the times when you’re on the backside of the spiral. But, first, let’s build your Spiral of Life. This is the fun part where you get to envision and map what you want to see unfold in your life.

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 31

Chapter 6

MAPPING YOUR SPIRAL: 8 IMPORTANT QUESTIONS

THE FIRST STEP TO COMPLETE IS A SELF-AUDIT. GRAB YOUR JOURNAL OR SOME BLANK SHEETS OF PAPER AND ANSWER THE 8 QUESTIONS BELOW.

What feels most right for you today to focus your attention on? What spiral do you want to climb? You can choose from the list of spirals below or if you have a different one, that also works. Ideally, you’ll choose just one spiral, but if you’re having trouble choosing and there are a couple of things that feel really important right now, you can choose 2. However, I would recommend choosing two at most for your first set of 33 days. This will allow you to really focus on the process and strengthen the muscles that allow you to continually upspiral. Relationships (your family and friends) Your life dreams and goals Your finances Relationship/significant other

Your Mental Wellbeing and Spiritual Journey

Your Work/Career

32 Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan

Why do you think you haven’t accomplished what you selected yet? Is there anything in your way? Do you have any doubts at all that you can do it? What about fears? Is there anything that scares you about it?

The Possibility of Today by Sibyl Chavis

3 4

What changes can you make in your life that will help you take steps toward what you want? Now pretend like you’re putting together a long “to do” list that includes all the specific steps you can do during the next 33 days to move forward. List out all the possible steps… and think baby and tiny little steps forward. The smaller, and the more specific the better. As an example, here’s a list of things on my current action plan list for my work spiral: update my website with 4 new articles, record 2 podcasts, complete my social media monthly plan, put together my email communication plan, and write the first 4 emails for the month. Here’s a list of things for my fitness and workout spiral I’m climbing: get to the gym twice a week, work out with Alex on Saturday mornings, play tennis with Ashley on Mondays, Eric on Wednesdays and Mike on Fridays. Intermittent fasting and healthy eating M-F and Sunday. Saturday = cheat day, but try to be as healthy as possible. Yoga on Tuesday and Sunday morning.

Are you in an Infinite Loop or a Reverse Spiral today? Are you making any of the same mistakes over and over again? spinning your wheels? Feeling stuck? What can you do today to start breaking out of it?

Do you have any bad habits? Are there any patterns that keep coming up in your life? Are you procrastinating about moving forward with what you want? Is there anything else you know deep down you need to work on our change?

Why do you want to climb the spiral(s) you listed in question 1? What are the benefits going to be for you once you’ve done it? What will change for the better in your life? Think big and small.

What does success look like? What will you have in your life after you’ve accomplished what you listed out in question 1?

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 33

THE SECOND STEP IS TO EXTRACT SOME INFORMATION FROM THE SELF-AUDIT AND FILL OUT THE SPIRAL OF LIFE MAP. ON THE NEXT PAGE, YOU’LL HAVE A BLANK SPIRAL SO YOU CAN FILL IN THE INFORMATION DESCRIBED BELOW. READ EACH OF THESE SECTIONS AND THEN COMPLETE THE MAP. Success Description: Provide a quick summary and describe what your success looks like. You’ll be able to use some of the information you wrote down to answer question #7 and #8.

Your Outer Work: This is a list of the outer work you’ll be doing. Many of these things will happen and fall into place during a time when you’re on the frontside of the spiral. You’ll want to make note of what to expect so you recognize the times you’re on the frontside of the spiral. It’s time to go and keep moving forward. -Insert a bullet point list. You ‘ll be able to pull your list together based on your answers to questions #3, and #4.

Your Inner Work: This is a list of the inner work you’ll get to work through (patterns, doubts, bad habits, etc.) as you journey up your spiral. They will most likely come up when you have times in life that you’re on the backside of the spiral. You’ll want to be aware of what might come up because it allows you to focus on making important changes and getting rid of anything that’s weighing you down or working against you. -Insert a bullet point list. You’ll be able to pull your list together based on your answers to questions #2, #3, #5, and #6

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SPIRAL OF LIFE MAP What does success mean to me?

________________________________ ________________________________ ________________________________ ________________________________ ________________________________ ________________________________ ________________________________

ari

s& nge e l l Cha rowth G

Reali z

ation

s What will my Outer work look like? • •

nges & Challe th Grow

New S

kills wth

es & Gro

Challeng

Small & Big Challenges

Wins

& Growth

Insights

• • •

What will my Inner work look like? • • • • •

rowth

Challenges & G

Making Progress wth

Challenges & Gro

Inspired

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 35

Chapter 7

YOUR DAILY ACTION PLAN Okay, now that we’ve completed your spiral and one of the most important parts of your 33 Day Action Plan, we’ll move on to the final two parts. All we have left to do is customize the template for your Daily Action Plan and walk through how the 33 Day Scorecard works. It’s time to grab a journal or notebook. Every day for the next 33 days, you’ll want to write in the same journal or a notebook so you can keep all your thoughts and work organized in one place. Let’s do the very first day of journaling right now and go through the routine together so you’ll know what to do each morning for the remaining days of your action plan. At the beginning of the day, you’ll want to spend 5 to 10 minutes journaling. At the top of the page write the date and what day you’re on in the 33-day plan. Here’s an example on the next page of how each journal entry will look. It includes 4 sections: (1) Reflect on your Spiral (2) Your Inner Work Focus for the Day (3) Your Outer Work Focus for the Day and (4) Envision A Great Day filled with 3s (which will be discussed next). But, first check out on the next page what you want your daily journal entry to look like. You’ll find a blank version in Part Three of this workbook.

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DAILY ACTION PLAN Date: 01/03/ 2022 Day: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33

REFLECT ON YOUR SPIRAL:

Every morning you’ll look at your spiral and write down the benefits that are happening in your life because you’ve chosen to upspiral. Assume you’ve already accomplished your spiral and write the words “Thank you for__________” and include a summary of what you answered to question #1 and #8 of your self-audit. Spend a couple of minutes journaling about what you’re grateful for and what you’ve already set in motion to come into your life. There’s nothing better than getting a boost of good energy in the morning that aligns us with feelings of gratitude. So many good things are happening in my life. I!ve gotten my life on track, I work out everyday, read with my morning coffee, get the girls ready for school, and take a walk before work. Thank you, God, for an incredible routine. Today it makes sense to focus on my finances, get my bills straight, and make a plan for my next big purchase. I!ve been consumed with negative thoughts and catastrophizing the outcome. I!m grateful for my family, friends, health and beauty of life. I!m ahead in my career and family matters are falling into place. I!m grateful for my family, friends, health and beauty of life. I!m ahead in my career and family matters are falling into place. I!m grateful for my family, friends, health and beauty of life. I!m ahead in my career and family matters are falling into place.

YOUR INNER WORK FOCUS FOR THE DAY:

Sometimes when we’re journaling in the morning, we get the best ideas of lessons we’ve learned and ways to move forward. That’s what you want to write down here. What can you do differently today and take another step forward in terms of your inner growth? Pick one thing that you’ll work on today in terms of your inner work. What’s alive for you most right now? Choose just 1-2 words that encompass your inner work for the day that will be easy to remember today (i.e. “letting go,” “surrender” “staying grounded” “love and kindness”). Today I can stop complaining, look for the good things in my day. I!m going to make sure I listen to my inner voice and stop doubting myself. I!m letting go, surrendering to the events, and leaving my worries behind. My priority is to have a healthy mindset and lead with kindness.

OUTER WORK FOCUS FOR THE DAY:

Go through the list of items you put together for your self-audit question #4. Pick 1-2 things you’ll work on today in terms of your outer work. What tasks can you complete today that will allow you to take another step forward in terms of the spiral you’re moving up? More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here.

ENVISION A GREAT DAY FILLED WITH 3(S):

Write down all the ways you’ll have a great day and what you’re doing today will go smoothly. How will you be good to yourself? How will you be good to other people? How will you interact and engage with them? with the people around you? How will you interact with people? Things will flow. You’ll do your inner work, your outer work and get your 3(s), which we’re going to talk about next. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here. More personalized text here.

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 37

Chapter 8

HOW DO WE BEST MOVE UP THE SPIRAL OF LIFE? BY GETTING OUR 3S EVERYDAY! WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO GET YOUR 3S EVERY DAY? The choices we make every day determine if we take steps forward up the spiral. When we make our highest and best choices and have good thoughts, actions, responses, etc. during the day, they add up, create positive momentum, and we take more steps forward. The Extraordinary Side has taken the lead in our lives and when we do that, it means we get our 3s for the day. Imagine a scorecard from 1 to 3, where 3 is the highest score you can get. You rank your thoughts, actions, decisions and anything you say or do on this scale. You give yourself a 3 every time you make a really good decision during the day. These are the decisions when you listen to the wisdom and the guidance of your Extraordinary Side. The little and big decisions both count (i.e. responding kindly to a stranger, doing your meditation practice for the day, taking the high road when a coworker pushes your buttons, giving 100% to writing a work email, doing your inner work for the day, completing your outer work for the day, doing your journal morning routine, etc.).

Are your thoughts, actions, and interactions with others the best they can be? Are you rising to your highest and best actions? Or, as you’ll begin to ask yourself as you move through each day, “Was that a 3?”

Awesome Response (Extraordinary Side)

Decent Response

Poor Response

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On any given day, we make hundreds of decisions. You get to decide what you’re going to do and when. Will you exercise today? Yoga? Mediate? Spend time doing a healthy morning routine? Will you give 100% at work and go the extra mile? Finish that time you’ve been supposed to do? Or, will you push it off one more day? In terms of the conversations and interactions you’ll have with other people, will you really listen? or will you interrupt? What about the thoughts that run through your mind? Will you let your mind continually focus on negativity and complaints? Will you spend time today thinking about what you appreciate and what you’re grateful for? Will you reflect on how much you love the people around you? We could go on and on with examples because today and everyday you’ll make so many decisions and choose to do certain things. The BIG question though is will all of the thoughts, words, and actions we’re taking positively add up, work together, and create positive momentum in our lives. This is what we’re aiming for each day because it’s how we move up any spiral we’re climbing. Every single thought we have, action we take and choice we make today will either work for us or against us. When we listen and follow the guidance of our Extraordinary Side, we can be assured we’re making the choices that work for us. Hmmmm, what should I do today?

+2 points +2 points +2 +2 points points I think if I just give 50% effort that’s enough to get the job done.

+1 points +1 points +1 points +1points

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+3 points points points points

+3 Journaling +3 and completing +3 everything on my daily action plan for the day, including exercise

Remember to get my 3s!

+3 points +3 points +3 +3 points points

I doubt all this hard work will pay off so why should I bother doing it?

Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 39

HOW GETTING YOUR 3S WORKS It’s all about the 3s Now, the good news about getting your 3s, is that it’s TOTALLY doable and within our control. It’s not hard or anything we have to struggle with. We just have to be willing to aim for our highest and best decisions as we move through the day. We also can make course corrections anytime we know we have fallen short. Maybe we apologize right away if we get a 1 because we said something we know we shouldn’t have and it hurts someone’s feelings. We also make sure that after that incident we’re much more thoughtful about what we say so we’re able to give ourselves 3s for the rest of the day.

The key isn’t to beat ourselves up or let our inner critic have a field day making us feel bad, but instead to use this rating system as a simple and effective way to continually make the choices that keep us upspiraling every day. To use my life as an example, yesterday, I had a lot of work to do and I’m currently doing lots of inner work focusing on self-compassion and not letting the Chief Negativity Officer in my mind convince me that I’m not working hard enough. But, I also was having one of those “blah” days and didn’t immediately feel inspired to jump into either my inner or outer work. However, one good habit I’ve been able to build over the years is really tuning in to the wisdom of my Extraordinary Side and rising to my 3s, even if I don’t start the day getting them. I ended up giving myself the morning off and by 3:00, I was ready to start getting my 3s. I did my inner work (a special self-compassion practice) and finished all the tasks I needed to complete for the day. I cleaned up my day and got my 3s! Or, another example that might also be helpful to you if you’re ever around people who seem to continually miss out on opportunities to get their own 3s, when it comes to their words and what they say. A couple of days ago, I was speaking with someone I love dearly, but she has a habit of criticizing other people. We were out to dinner with another one of our friends and she began unfairly criticizing him for something he didn’t even do. I chose to get my 3 and gently point out to her that he had not done anything wrong and that it was unfair for her to continually poke at him because there are better ways for her to share her opinions. I didn’t raise my voice. I didn’t get worked up. I just shared how I felt very clearly, non-emotionally, got my point across, and also got my 3. That’s how getting your 3s works. I think you’ll really find this to be one of the most helpful tools as you upspiral. It’s a simple way that helps us stay focused on making our best choices and helps us keep doing our inner work and our outer work. It also keeps us aligned with our Extraordinary Side as we move through the day. The key is to move through your day aiming for your 3s and rising to them. At the end of the day, you’ll want to take note of how you did and make any adjustments you feel are necessary to get more 3s moving forward. You’ll be able to use your daily scorecard to track your progress.

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 41

PART THREE: REFERENCE SHEETS (PRINT OUTS)

• Summary Points • Frontside and Backside Checklist • Self-audit • Your Spiral of Life Map • Your Daily Action Plan • 33 Days of Scorecards

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7 IMPORTANT INSIGHTS ABOUT LIFE AND UPSPIRALING is about letting our Extraordinary Side lead the way and moving up the spiral. Our life and everything we 1 Life experience unfolds as we make our way up the spiral of life. One of the main benefits of upspiraling is our

growth. Our inner growth is the foundation for everything, including the outer success and positive results that show up in our lives.

Watch out for Infinite Loops and Reverse Spirals. Two patterns that we fall into, either consciously or unconsciously—that cause us to spin our wheels and make no progress or downspiral.

FRONTSIDE & BACKSIDE CHECKLIST FRONTSIDE CHECKLIST

BACKSIDE CHECKLIST

When you’re on the frontside of the spiral, it’s time to make significant progress.

When you’re on the backside of the spiral, it’s time to maximize your inner growth.

❑

Tap into your inspiration. This is a time to tap into your inspiration and good energy to stay recharged and keep taking lots of steps forward

❑

Hopeful and Confident: Although there are still steps forward to take, it’s good to spend time every day reminding yourself that things are falling into place

❑

Integration opportunity: When you’re on the front side of the spiral and taking lots of steps forward, it’s important to take the right steps. You’re being asked to integrate and apply all the lessons you’ve learned. Tap into new skills, your intuition and your wisdom. Gratitude flowing: This is also a time to reflect on everything that is happening and everyone in your life that you’re grateful for.

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❑

Stay focused on Today: Avoid the trap of getting bogged down by worries and doubts about the future. Devote your attention to the day in front of you and taking the best step forward today.

❑

Elevate your perspective: Remind yourself frequently of the bigger picture and that you’re just on the backside of the spiral and a frontside is coming.

❑

Elevate your thoughts: Waves of doubts, fears and worries might surface. Look at situations through a different lens; bring your highest and best perspective to situations

❑

Focus on alignment: Quiet your mind and do your inner work. Make it your #1 priority during the day.

Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 43

SELF-AUDIT OF YOUR LIFE TODAY: 8 IMPORTANT QUESTIONS TO ANSWER MAPPING OUT YOUR SPIRAL OF LIFE Okay, the first step to complete is a self-audit. Grab your journal or some blank sheets of paper and answer the 7 questions below.

What feels most right for you today to focus your attention on? What spiral do you want to climb?

What changes can you make in your life that will help you take steps toward what you want?

Now pretend like you’re putting together a long “to do” list that includes all the specific steps you can do during the next 33 days to move forward.

Why do you want to climb the spiral(s) you listed in question 1? What are the benefits going to be for you once you’ve done it? What will change for the better in your life? Think big and small.

What does success look like? What will you have in your life after you’ve accomplished what you listed out in question 1?

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SPIRAL OF LIFE MAP What does success mean to me?

ari

s& nge e l l Cha rowth G

Reali z

ation

s What will my Outer work look like? • •

nges & Challe th Grow

New S

kills th

s & Grow

e Challeng

Small & Big Challenges

Wins

& Growth

Insights

• • •

What will my Inner work look like? • • • • •

rowth

Challenges & G

Making Progress wth

Challenges & Gro

Inspired

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 45

DAILY ACTION PLAN Date:

Day: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33

REFLECT ON YOUR SPIRAL:

YOUR INNER WORK FOCUS FOR THE DAY:

OUTER WORK FOCUS FOR THE DAY:

ENVISION A GREAT DAY FILLED WITH 3(S):

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SCORE CARD JOURNAL ENTRY 1 2 3

JOURNAL ENTRY 1 2 3

INNER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

OUTER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

GETTING MY 3S 1 2 3

JOURNAL ENTRY 1 2 3

INNER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

OUTER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

GETTING MY 3S 1 2 3

JOURNAL ENTRY 1 2 3

INNER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

OUTER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

GETTING MY 3S 1 2 3

JOURNAL ENTRY 1 2 3

INNER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

OUTER WORK FOCUS 1 2 3

GETTING MY 3S 1 2 3

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Upspiraling: The 33-Day Action Plan 47

AN IMPORTANT QUESTION FOR THE DAY, THE ONE QUESTION TO ASK YOURSELF:

DID YOU GET YOUR 3S TODAY?

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Lifestyle and Wellness Coaching Guide

Articles inside

Your Extraordinary Side & The Journey Up the Spiral

Daily Action Plan

Three Different Phases We Experience as we Upspiral

The Spiral of Life