Thinktank Magazine

Page 1

th!nktank

THE STIGMA • PART 1 OF 4

NAVIGATING MENTAL HEALTH

SPEAKING UP







Letter from the Editor I created Th!nktank after going through a year long journey of mental health recovery. As I came out the other side of the tunnel, I wondered how much earlier I would’ve reached out for help had I known what I know now: the hardest part of this journey is letting yourself ask for help. The stigma regarding mental health prevented me from seeking help. My family never talks about it, and very few people I knew actually were open about their own mental health struggles. I let my mental health deteriorate until I was no longer able to live through a normal day. Every action that I made was confronted with waves of anxiety and my depression made it hard to even get out of bed. I finally had enough of not being in control of my own body, and I found a doctor that could help. The change didn’t happen overnight, but a few month later I found myself doing things without even thinking that I previously would’ve had to mull over for days to work up the courage. The craziest thing about this is, it was so easy. I thought I was in for an extensive psychiatric process. However, my doctor explained to me that this was a very common mental health issue, treatable with a daily medicine and a few therapy sessions. This was baffling to me. I was one of millions of Americans dealing with the same journey to recovering, and my worst enemy was myself. I decided that I needed to talk about my journey more. The reason I felt so alone in my fight was because none of the people around me felt like they were going through anything like that. As I started opening up with my friends and family I found that more and more people were dealing with the exact same thing. Mental health is treated like taboo, something that should be kept a secret, but it’s an essential part of our overall health. If I broke my arm, I wouldn’t try to hide it from the world, so why was I dealing with my anxiety any differently? I decided to create thinktank in the hopes of building something that visually represents how commonplace and normal mental health is. I wanted to give people a platform to share their stories, and provide hope to people dealing with mental health themselves. We all are on the same journey, so there’s no need to go it alone. Thank you for Reading, Jasmyne Schiebaum


Contents

10 14 21 22 26 33

34 44 52 64 70 76 cover photography by dillon luymes

80


Young Are More Aware of Mental Health, Yet Less Resilient Can We Talk About Mental Health Yet? It Was Not Death, for I Stood Up Mental Health and Personal Hygiene Mental Health and the Effects of Social Media Reflection Dillon Luymes, Photographer Lisa and Ethan Hertz, Mom & Son Emily Feldman, Poet & Writer Self-Help Techniques For Coping With Mental Illness Cats Are The Unsung Heroes Of Mental Health Friends With Benefits How I Dug Myself Out of the Millennial Mental Health Decline


of americans experience a


Mental health and substance use challenges can take many forms. There’s depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, addiction and the list goes on. Some of these challenges are more visible and you might recognize them immediately. Others can be harder to see when you’re not looking for them. But, they are still there.

source: national council for behavioral health

11


Young Are More Aware of Mental Health, Yet Less Resilient Millennials don’t stigmatize mental illness. They also have more of it. by John-Manuel Andriote

LGBTQ Millennials are twice as concerned

Higher rates of mental illness

about depression and mental health as LGBTQ Baby Boomers, according to a large new survey. Research finds that while they are less stigmatizing of mental health and illness, they are also less skilled at making the human connections needed to support it.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness says LGBTQ individuals are almost three times more likely than others to experience a mental health condition, such as major depression or a generalized anxiety disorder. NAMI says our youth are four times more likely than heterosexuals to attempt suicide, experience suicidal thoughts, or engage in self-harming behavior.

Released in June, Community Marketing and Insights’ 12th Annual LGBTQ Community Survey of 18,743 participants in the United States, found that 62 percent of the participating Millennials (born 1981-1999) rank mental health issues as a major health concern—compared with only 31 percent of the Boomers (born 1942-1964).

No matter their age, the common denominator in every study of LGBTQ mental health is discrimination and stigma. A 2017 study of the special considerations in evaluating the mental health of LGBT


elders found these older adults are at risk for significant mental and physical health disparities. They have higher rates of anxiety, depression, and substance abuse disorders. The stressors LGBT elders face include coming out, prejudice, stigma, anti-LGBT violence, and internalized homophobia, or self-stigma. “Discrimination,” write the researchers, “is at the center of the substantial risk factors for this population and their communities, since it hinders both access and utilization of care.” In fact, 76 percent of all those participating in the Community Survey ranked LGBTQ discrimination as the number-one problem.

The Millennial mental health crisis NAMI says that more than 5 million college students are struggling with mental health, the reason many are calling it a “crisis of mental health.” A 2015 Chronicle of Higher Education report called "An Epidemic of Anguish" found more than 25 percent of college students have a diagnosable mental illness and had been treated in the past year. Suicide is the second leading killer

of college students—three times the rate in 1950, according to the American College Health Association (ACHA). Clearly LGBTQ Millennials aren’t the only ones of their generation experiencing higher rates of mental illness. A Vox Magazine report, “A Generation on Edge: A Look at Millennials and Mental Health,” cites a number of reasons for the uptick, including high-performance expectations for sports and universities, and “helicopter parents” who inject themselves between their wellloved children and any challenge that comes their way. “Millennials don’t feel comfortable struggling,” says ACHA past president Dan Jones. “They don’t have the resilience of previous generations.” Jones attributes this to the lack of problemsolving skills caused by ever-present parents’ removing every obstacle their children face. In fact a 2011 study at the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga found that students with helicopter parents are more likely to be medicated for anxiety and/or depression. 13


If hovering parents aren’t bad enough, Millennials face the idealized lives their peers present to the world in their social media posts. As many as 98 percent of Millennials use social media, and as Vox puts it, they are “the first generation to go through the trials of reaching adulthood through the everpresent lens of social media,” each day spending an average of three hours and 12 minutes using it.

Reasons for hope Despite the challenges and grim statistics, there are more than ample reasons to hope the mental health of LGBTQ people will improve and future generations will be less burdened by depression, anxiety, and other challenges that undermine health and shorten lifespans.

“A 2011 study found that students with helicopter parents are more likely to be medicated for anxiety and/or depression”

Compared with members of the Greatest Generation (born 19101924) and Silent Generation (born 1925-1945), Boomers show a higher level of community integration, larger social networks—and higher rates of discrimination and victimization. The first generation to value, and even insist upon, “coming out” about their sexuality has paid a high social price for their openness—while also enjoying the greater reward of a supportive community. “Despite the focus on health problems,” writes Karen I. Fredriksen-Goldsen, professor in the Hartford Center of Excellence in Geriatric Social Work at the University of Washington in Seattle, in “Promoting Health Equity Among LGBT Mid-Life and Older Adults,” “there are many positive signs of health, resilience, and strength among mid-life and older LGBT adults.” She notes that research finds most LGBT older adults are healthy, satisfied with their lives, aging well, and have strong personal and social ties.

Fredriksen-Goldsen reports that social support, social network size, physical and leisure activities, and substance non-use are strongly associated with high physical and mental health quality of life among LGBT mid-life and older adults. What’s more, three-fourths of LGBT Boomers in an online survey believe


their experience of living as a sexual or gender minority has better prepared them to deal with aging and becoming old—another stigmatized identity. It’s important to point out that Boomers, and those who grew up before the Internet and social media, are used to face-to-face socialization rather than constructing their social lives around social media. One can reasonably surmise that investing their social energy and time in relationships in the “real world,” rather than the sanitized self-presentation of Facebook and Instagram, pays dividends in the sense of connectedness and belonging that is so important to personal happiness and good mental health.The tremendous advantages available to LGBT Millennials include a far higher percentage of openly gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered people. There is more institutional support for LGBT rights and causes. They can legally wed the person they love regardless of his or her sex. They can serve openly in the military.

Perhaps most importantly, Millennials are learning about mental health at an earlier age and not stigmatizing it. Celebrities are openly talking about their struggles. And of course social media, such a central part of their lives, offers them what is perhaps its most positive and powerful benefit of all: the awareness that they are not alone. For so many of us, knowing we weren't "the only one" was all we needed to set us on the road to healing and wholeness. The need to know we aren’t alone transcends generations. In fact it’s a big part of being human. The only difference today is that we have many more ways of staying connected. Of course it’s still up to each of us to choose for ourselves connection over isolation, and resilience over brokenness.

source: psycology today

15


SAMPLE SPREADS

^ Dovie / Dillon Lumyes/February 2019 ^


Can we talk about Mental Health now? by Isabelle Saint-Pierre

Regardless of what people say there is a stigma associated with mental health issues. No, scratch that, there is a stigma associated with talking about mental health issues. Nope, nope, nope, still not right. There is a stigma with admitting you have any mental health issues. It’s okay to admit mental health problems are an issue. Talking about mental health issues is okay. But never admit to having mental health problems. Nope, never under any circumstances admit you have mental health problems. That’s the message given to those of us who suffer mental health problems. I moved to Southern California to be closer to family while I struggle with my depression. However, my interactions with my family have shown me how ingrained the stigma of mental health issues can be. While many of my family struggle with mental health or addiction issues, the stigma of mental health issues reaches far into my family. 17


During my last major bout with mental illness (2013–2015) I lived halfway across the country in Kansas. My family isn’t familiar with my mental health issues or what to look for. They do know I ended up in the state mental hospital for a long while; other than that, they don’t know how my issues affect me. They also don’t know what to look for, how they can help, or things like that.

“Whatever you do, don’t tell (insert name here) that you suffer from mental health problems or they’ll use it against me,” was the takeaway from that dinner. I’m not to share with family about my mental health issues because of how it would affect my mother? This part of the conversation shocked me. It woke me up

Welcome to California, where appearance is more important than substance. To some degree, I too am guilty of perpetuating the stigma of mental health issues. Not sharing with my family about what I was going through helps perpetuate the stigma.

Whatever You do, Don’t Tell… After arriving at my parent’s place, I was having dinner with my mother and we were discussing my issues and plans. It was a how long are you going to be crashing on an inflatable mattress at my place talk, but it did open my eyes to a few issues.

to how bad the stigma of mental health issues can be. It shocked me because my mother was more worried about how my mental health issues would make her look. Welcome to California where appearance is more important than substance.

Never Admit You Hear Voices The above might not have shocked so much me if it hadn’t come on the heels of a conversation with my sister. My sister had a small get-together so I could meet her roommates. During the conversation, I somehow mentioned I hear voices and see things that aren’t there. Hello, psychosis is part of my depression, so hearing and seeing things is part of the package. “OMG, never admit you hear voices, not to


anyone,” my sister interjected at the top of her lungs. While I said it in a normal voice and only those in the room could hear, now the entire apartment building new. I’m an open person and don’t have problems talking about things in my life. While my openness about my life doesn’t bother me, it seems to bother others. The way I see it, the more people around me know about my mental health issues, the more they can help me. Unless they know I can get psychotic, they won’t know what to look for. This incident helped highlight the stigma of mental health issues. When combined, the two incidents shout ‘don’t talk about your mental health issues, it makes us look bad’. Not that it makes me look bad, but how it makes those around me look. How can we fight the stigma of mental health issues when it is so ingrained in every aspect of our lives?

^ Lilly / Dillon Lumyes/February 2019 ^

source: medium

19


This is because society in general has stereotyped views about mental illness and how it affects people. Many people believe that people with mental ill health are violent and dangerous, when in fact they are more at risk of being attacked or harming themselves than harming other people. Stigma and discrimination can also worsen someone’s mental health problems, and delay or impede their getting help and treatment, and their recovery. Social isolation, poor housing, unemployment and poverty are all linked to mental ill health. So stigma and discrimination can trap people in a cycle of illness.


source: mental health foundation UK



It Was Not Death, for I Stood Up by Emily Dickinson; 1894 It was not Death, for I stood up, And all the Dead, lie down— It was not Night, for all the Bells Put out their Tongues, for Noon. It was not Frost, for on my Flesh I felt Siroccos—crawl— Nor Fire—for just my Marble feet Could keep a Chancel, cool— And yet, it tasted, like them all, The Figures I have seen Set orderly, for Burial, Reminded me, of mine— As if my life were shaven, And fitted to a frame, And could not breathe without a key, And ’twas like Midnight, some – When everything that ticked—has stopped— And Space stares—all around— Or Grisly frosts—first Autumn morns, Repeal the Beating Ground— But, most, like Chaos—Stopless—cool— Without a Chance, or Spar— Or even a Report of Land— To justify—Despair.

23


“Put simply, being a human and managing the body that goes with that sucks.�


Mental Health and Personal Hygiene by Emily Kate

I work in a field that sees a lot of variety in the people walking through our doors. Not variety as in wealthy vs. poor, but more a wide array of parolees, addicts, homeless, mentally ill, disabled, generally down-ontheir-luck individuals. And while some are rough around the edges, most of them are a wealth of kindness, humor, and when it comes down to it, very attractive personality. These people are hard working, well-intentioned and truly beautiful in ways that may or may not be visible to me as I first witness them coming through our doors that first time. Something I’ve noticed over the past year and a half of my employment here is also something that I don’t feel is talked about enough, despite how common it is among those struggling with any sort of mental health issue. And this is the ability to maintain their personal hygiene, or, more accurately, the inability to do so. Like I said, I interact with a lot of society’s “outcasts” on a daily basis. People who have been failed by their own kind, slipping through the cracks of a healthcare system

that has been failing all of us for a very long time. People with truly decent souls despite (or perhaps because of) the struggles they’ve faced in their, often very young, lives. When working with the kind of individual I’m writing this in honor of there is always a history of mental illness. Whether that be depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, whatever. These sorts of struggles are a sure thing in the lives of these people. The disorders leave the inflicted individuals wearing dirty clothes, their hair often matted and greasy, skin slick with layers of sweat and/ or old makeup. Many of them have viciously strong body odor and halitosis. Regardless of how society may treat them (which is usually badly), the language rolling off their bodies screams for acceptance despite their often quiet voices and the way their shoulders fold inward into themselves. Upon intake of these clients I am often a sounding board for a lot of complaints and life stories, depending on if the individual is chatty or not. I hear about how they are treated and I witness how other clients interact with those who may have this poor hygiene. 25


These observations lead me to believe this issue isn’t talked about nearly as often as it should be, especially considering it is, apparently, so rampantly common. Its a huge, stinking pile of symptoms in the room of mental illness that no one likes to bring attention to because its such a delicate sort of thing to talk about. Which is why I am writing this. If you are someone who struggles with maintaining your own cleanliness, here is what I want to say to you: You are not gross. You are not “bad.” You are not “less” than anyone who doesn’t struggle with maintaining a standard of self-care your disorder makes difficult right now. I am so, so proud of you for being here, alive, contributing to the world with your presence. (Because your life here does contribute, regardless of if you believe that right now or not.) I am proud of you for getting out of bed. I am proud of you if you managed to eat some breakfast, or wash your face. I am proud of you if you put on fresh clothes today. I am proud of you for whatever feat you may have accomplished recently that might not seem significant to “normal” society. Because it is a huge fucking deal and you should be so proud of yourself.

Put simply, being a human and managing the body that goes with that sucks. These bodies are demanding and always changing and require deep wells of effort to maintain. It just makes sense that if our brains are sick, it will effect the way we take care of our corporeal selves as well. Its a natural result of illness. Which is why in closing, I’d also like to say: You are not alone. I see you, and I know this isn’t your fault. Please don’t let embarrassment over your ability to take care of yourself hold you back, because there are more people out in the world that understand than you think. This is just a symptom of a greater issue, that issue being something that can heal over time. Give yourself patience. Give yourself permission to celebrate small victories, and embrace the “baby steps” process.


“You’ve got this.

You can handle this.

And I am so very proud of you.”


“The factors that may contribute to depression are the various

measures of popularity

that [social media] creates.� ^ Untitled / Dillon Lumyes/January 2019 ^


Mental Health and the Effects of Social Media Studies show that the way we use social media can determine its effects on mood. by Allison Abrams, LCSW-R

Is Facebook making you depressed? If so, you’re not alone. According to a recent study by UK disability charity Scope, of 1500 Facebook and Twitter users surveyed, 62 percent reported feeling inadequate and 60 percent reported feelings of jealousy from comparing themselves to other users. I’ve heard similar complaints from friends and I’ve felt it myself on a bad day. Most frequently, I hear such statements from those who are struggling with depression. It makes sense that if you are already in a low mood or not feeling good about yourself, having pictures of happy couples and smiling babies pop up on your screen on a consistent basis may make you feel worse. The same is true if you tend to generally have a negative outlook on life.

If Facebook posts depress you, the solution is simple. Here are four things you can do today to help you cope: 1. Deactivate your Facebook account (you can always reactivate it later) 2.Unfollow your most (seemingly) happy and successful friends 3.Remember that Facebook isn’t a representation of reality 4.Turn off the computer and go make your own annoyingly happy moments Should you really take the four actions above? In a 2015 study on the effects of Facebook use on mental health, researchers at the University of Missouri discovered that regular use could lead to symptoms of depression if the site triggered feelings of envy in the user. 29


“If it is used as a way to size up one’s own accomplishments against others, it can have a negative effect,” said Professor Margaret Duffy, one of the professors who co-authored the research. She explains that if it’s used “to see how well an acquaintance is doing financially or how happy an old friend is in his relationship - things that cause envy among users use of the site can lead to feelings of depression.”

With all of the suffering and pain in the world, wouldn’t it be a tragedy if people stopped sharing joyful events for fear of making someone else jealous? Imagine if people only discussed all of the negative things that surrounded them. Especially over this past year, don’t we have enough tragic posts appearing in our newsfeeds 24/7? Given that

“the majority of there will always be who’s social media users someone However, those who use taller, richer, the site primarily to feel better-looking, tend to edit and connected do not experience who has more the negative effects. In fact, friends, a when not triggering feelings post only their most better job, etc., of envy, the study shows, we can either attractive pictures” allow ourselves Facebook could be a good resource and have positive effects on well-being.

Further studies have shown that the majority of social media users tend to edit and post only their most attractive pictures, or ‘put a rose-tinted gloss over their lives’ in an effort to idealize themselves and, researchers believe, to improve others’ impressions of them. To avoid Facebook-induced depression, users should be aware of the risks of using the site as a tool of comparison. Furthermore, users should be aware that most people are presenting a biased, positive version of reality on social media. Finally, if you’re still feeling down, angry, or generally disillusioned because of the positive news shared by your Facebook friends, on or offline, you should question why you feel that way. Barring clinical depression or a recent life setback, is it really such a bad thing to see another human being enjoying life, especially if it’s a friend- or at least someone you tolerate enough to accept as a Facebook friend? source: psychology today

to fall into the dangerous trap of comparison, or we can choose to remember that regardless of what others around you appear to have, everyone is grappling with their own struggles. For every promotion, book deal and Tony nomination, chances are, the recipient has experienced equally or more significant life setbacks.

Also important to remember is that for every person that seems to have more, there is another with less. For each individual whose qualities you covet, there’s someone out there who wishes they had what you have. If we can’t change our outer circumstances, at least we can try to change our perspective and learn to be grateful for what we have. We can also learn to celebrate other’s successes. Sharing in other people’s joy can often lift our spirits. “Be aware of what others are doing, applaud their efforts, acknowledge their successes, and encourage them in their pursuits. When we all help one another, everybody wins” - Jim Stovall


These suggestions may be difficult, especially if you’re struggling with low self-worth or depression. If that is the case, seek help from a friend or a professional. Whether it’s reaching out for support, practicing gratitude or simply surrounding yourself with more of the positive, you owe it to yourself to make the best out of this life. Stop torturing yourself by comparing your life with everyone else’s positively biased representations of theirs. Seek to improve your own life in a realistic manner. Choose to look at the positives and to celebrate your wins… as well as theirs.

Home Alone III/Dillon Lumyes/January 2019 >


source: vertical health llc; psycom


One study out of the University of Pittsburgh, for example, found a correlation between time spent scrolling through social media apps and negative body image feedback. Those who had spent more time on social media had 2.2 times the risk of reporting eating and body image concerns, compared to their peers who spent less time on social media. The participants who spent the most time on social media had 2.6 times the risk. Results from a separate study from the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine showed that the more time young adults spent on social media, the more likely they were to have problems sleeping and report symptoms of depression.

33



reflection by George Anthony; Jan 2018

i asked her, does it look the same? she gave me that funny look she gets whenever i say or do something a little dim it’s a mirror image for a reason she said in the mirror i see muscles, and strength hips a little too wide and fleshy but still muscular, strength all the way down but when i reflect on myself, no mirror necessary it is never the same i don’t feel as strong as i could don’t look as sharp and sturdy as i could those fleshy sides, too soft for a battle-hardened brain and turbulent thoughts

and that’s half the problem and the other half is that i hate the softness that lingers but everybody else loves it and i don’t want to be warm and able to be cuddled i want hard edges and nimble, spindly fingers; when i play my chords i want my bones to tap the strings and when sadness sheathes itself within me i want eyes as dry as my eczema-bitten hands

i need angles, i need straight lines but there’s nothing straight about me

^ Home Alone / Dillon Lumyes/ January 2019 ^

35



Dillon Lumyes PHOTOGRAPHER • THEY/THEM

Dillon / Austen Bond/ May 2018 ^

Dillon Luymes is a photographer specializing in conceptual street and editorial photography. They use their photography to convey personal emotions and express feeling often hard to put into words. From Grand Rapids, MI, Dillon is working on his BFA in photography, but they’ve already found a great visual voice. We sat down with Dillon to talk about how they use photography as a way to process and express their emotions.

< Dillon & Peanut / Nick Buwalda/ February 2019

37


Can you tell me a little bit about yourself? Where your from, where you go to school, what you aspire to in the future? I’m from Grand Rapids, attending GRCC. I aspire to make photography my full time career. I’m very passionate about music and art, and supporting that locally. Have you always been interested in photography? How did you choose this as your major? It was always a passion i wanted to pursue in the back of my head, but I didn’t really start shooting until about 2 years ago. After going to business school for one semester, I decided I wanted to pursue my passions instead of focusing solely on money. A lot of your work is very conceptual, expressing a feeling rather than just capturing a moment. Can you talk about how you use photography to process personal feelings and emotions? I started gathering a lot of inspiration and ideas from how I was feeling emotionally. I learned that a lot of my best work comes from personal feelings and trying to capture that in a way that feels relatable. I think art is a way for people to connect and ‘feel something’ which is a huge part of my work. Has photography always been a means of expression to you? When did you transition into using your work to convey a message? It definitely wasn’t always like that. It started out just taking portraits and photos that were nice to look at. It wasn’t until about a year ago that I started shooting photos that mean something more beyond the edits or person in the photo. Once I found that connection it felt easier to produce work I was proud of and something that other people could connect to.


^ Skating / Tess Eileen / April 2018

You recently did a shoot that was inspired by the feeling you had being home alone for a while. Does a lot of your inspiration come from the desire to visually convey an emotion? If it’s something beyond a commissioned photo session, most of the time I’m trying to convey something. A lot of what i’m feeling comes through with my photography.

39


v Self Portrait / Dillon Luymes / February 2018 v

You also have used yourself as the subject a few times. One in particular that stands out to me is a series of self portraits you took in order combat your own insecurities about your body. Do you find that being on the other end of the camera sometimes makes you see yourself differently? Absolutely. It’s not only hard to be the subject as well as the photographer, but it’s difficult to view your own insecurities as a work of art. It’s something you definitely have to let go and just work with.

As far as your mental health is concerned, do you experience any anxiety/depression? Have you encountered any stigma at all when talking about it with friends or family? I’ve experienced both anxiety and depression for quite a few years. It was hard for me to come to terms with it, but fortunately both my friends and family supported me and wanted me to take care of my mental health. Photography helps in a lot of ways.


You have recently come out as non-binary (yay for you btw!), has that process affected your mental health in either a positive or negative way?

Do you think that sharing your poetry has helped others through their own mental health issues? (models, followers, commissioners, etc)

Both. It’s very positive in the sense that I’ve become aware of my identity and what that means to me. There has been a very large negative effect on my mental health though. It wasn’t easy coming out to people, especially with my family. Lots of people don’t understand my identity which makes it hard to feel validated and happy. It has definitely fueled some of my anxieties/depression, but I overall feel that it has helped me through a lot of my mental health issues. Mentally working through that process of discovering who I am has helped me immensely.

A handful of people have come to me to say that they relate to and really connect with some of my work. It has greatly humbled me and given me more of a direction of what I want my work to say. If one person has a positive or meaningful reaction to any of my photos, that’s all I need to hear to keep me doing what I’m doing.

Is there a relief that comes from translating these feels to photographs? Do you feel like capturing them for others to see helps your process the emotions more effectively? The relief comes when I’m proud of what I’ve made and if I feel that the message was actually conveyed. Although if some of my work isn’t well received as I thought, I still try to not let it affect me. I love anything that I’m proud of, regardless of others opinion. I shoot mostly for myself, so if people don’t connect with my work, at least I do.

One final question: You have a pet snake and a pet cat. Can you tell us a little bit about them? Has they helped you with your mental health in any way? The cat was given to my roommates and I, so he had a place to stay. I love him immensely, but he’s not the most affectionate. Although when he’s being sweet it’s hard to walk away. However I do have quite a deep connection with my snake. Having a pet that I’m fully responsible for is a different kind of connection. I take care of him and he’s mine, so there’s a special feeling knowing that he sees me as his provider and support. We support each other so he is a great asset to helping my mental health issues.

How important do you think it is to have this sort of outlet when dealing with mental health? It is crucial in my opinion. Not having a positive or creative outlet just digs yourself into a deeper hole. Mental health is hard to deal with in its own but having something to help cope makes the biggest difference. 41







Lisa and Ethan Hertz

MOTHER & SON • SHE/HER • HE/HIM

Partners in Crime / Todd Hertz/ May 2015 ^

Dillon Luymes is a photographer specializing in conceptual street and editorial photography. They use their photography to convey personal emotions and express feeling often hard to put into words. From Grand Rapids, MI, Dillon is working on his BFA in photography, but they’ve already found a great visual voice. We sat down with Dillon to talk about how they use photography as a way to process and express their emotions.

< Lisa and Ethan / Todd Hertz/ May 2015

47


Can you tell me a little bit about yourself? Where your from, what you do, how old you are, what kind of mental health issues you deal with?

Lisa: I grew up in Canton, Michigan (Detroit Area), with 2 sisters and my parents. We were a family that didn’t talk about any emotional issues. My Dad definitely suffered from anxiety, but it was never talked about. I am a Marketing consultant for my own business, Kate Hertz Media. I am 49 years old. I have been dealing with anxiety/depression pretty much my whole life. It got especially bad in my teens. I always was worried about my health even when I was a little kid. My mom took me to the doctors as I would freak out about any bump, scratch or any symptom that I deemed to be “dangerous”. Whatever I had I knew with 100% certainty that it was a horrible disease and most likely Cancer. I have been to the ER probably 40 times over my lifetime. I was convinced that whatever ailment I was dealing with needed to be tested right away. Although I was embarrassed going to the doctor and ER so often, I needed to know that I was not dying. Even to myself it seems ridiculous and irrational, but my brain would get stuck on this thought and it was really hard to shake it. Even after the doctors told me I was fine. I would then worry that they missed something horrible, some rare disease. I started doing cognitive behavior therapy per my family doctors’ advice at about age 20. Also, for a few years I went to see my doctor every six months to talk about anything that was bothering me, this was to avoid the constant ER trips and try to normalize my obsessive thoughts. I was very lucky to have a family doctor that was extremely understanding! Besides health anxiety, I have generalized

anxiety disorder as well. I am a very anxious person. I am a worrier and don’t have a high self-esteem, so in social situations I sometimes get really nervous, especially if I think I “don’t belong.” I started getting panic attacks when I was in college, the first time it happened my boyfriend took me to the ER as we thought it was a heart attack. I had never heard of panic attacks. This was about 1992 and there was very little (if any) talk about mental health in the media.

Ethan: Well my name is Ethan hertz, I am 18 years old, I from grand haven Michigan. And I suffer from depression and a little OCD. How long have you been dealing with these issues?

Lisa: I have dealing with them my whole life, but in my early years I didn’t understand what it was. I was just told that I am a “worrier.” In my teens I was finally diagnosed, and therapy and meds were recommended.

Ethan: I’ve started becoming more aware of them for about the last two years. Lisa for you how was the process of getting help? Was there any stigma associated with mental illness at the time? How long did it take for you to own it and seek help? The process for getting help was fairly easy once I was finally diagnosed. The ER doctor that diagnosed my panic attacks, gave me information for therapists in the area. I was 20 years old before I got help for my issues. I think I finally owned it when I sat I the ER feeling like a fraud, as I felt like I was wasting the doctors time. However, even back then the doctors were very helpful


and comforting. They took it very seriously and didn’t make me feel alone or like I was “crazy.” However, it was not something that you shared with others as there was ZERO talk about mental health back then. I remember that I tried to find a book on health anxiety and the only thing I could find was a textbook for doctoral students on how to diagnose people with health anxiety (hypochondriasis.) It was really frustrating. Ethan, coming from a different generation, did you encounter a stigma? Was it hard for you to be open with your friends and family about what you were experiencing? No I did not as I go to a alternative high school were everyone is more open than the average student in my option. It did take a while to tell my family as it was hard to feel like this was real and to admit I have a problem. Lisa, having already gone through the process of confronting your own mental health, when Ethan

told you what he was going through did you feel more prepared? What was your initial reaction now having to help your son through a similar experience? I definitely felt more prepared than I would expect my mom did as I have been dealing with it my whole life. I have tried different kinds of therapy and meds over the years and that education helped me prepare for Ethan’s mental health issues. I felt really guilty thought as I thought that it was my fault, did I somehow pass this along in my genes or did I “teach” him to be anxious? I put a lot of stress on myself and I remember I cried after he told me as I didn’t want him to have to go through the struggles I did. However, it’s so much more in the open now and there are so many different kinds of helpful remedies available. I was surprised to see that there were even specialized books just for teens – and not just a few.


Ethan, do you feel like after you opened up about your struggles, did you get the support you were hoping for? Do you feel like you’re on the right track?

I started with the Life Coach, she gave me tangible exercises to do between sessions, books to read, and helped me determine what method work best for keeping my anxiety low. Reading, yoga, meditation and being able to talk about it with my friends. I am very open about my struggle and

After therapy and medication I feel like I’m at a better place than I was a few months ago and it helped me be more open to talk about thing when they happen. Ethan, do you think it was helpful to have someone like your mom who has been through what you’re going through? Yes as it helps me feel rational about my problems as others how I love to have dealt with them as well. Lisa, are you still encountering challenging with your personal mental health? What techniques do/did you find useful when working through these issues? I think that it’s something that I will deal with for the rest of my life, but unlike years ago, I have learned so many tips, tricks and tools to help me alleviate my ^ Lisa and Ethan / Todd Hertz/ May 2015 symptoms. There are still times although in my 20’s, I felt it was something when I get in a rut or stuck and I reach out shameful to hide, now I share because I want to my therapist and try to add exercise and people to know that what you see every day meditation to my daily routine. The thing on the outside isn’t always as it seems. There that helped me the most is staring with a Life are so many people struggling with mental Coach, although the therapist that I went health issues. I feel like one person at a time to were good, it was mostly just talk. When talking about their struggles adds some normalcy to the mental health conversation.


“The more people talk about the struggle, the more comfortable others will be talking about their issue� -Lisa

51


Ethan, what sort of outlets do you have (creative outlets, sports, video games, etc) that help you work through your issues? Do have you started doing these things more often since you’ve become more aware of maintaining your mental health? I have a therapist and a really good friend how I talk with about my problems. Ever since I open up, I have done both these things more frequently and has made my friendship tighter. Lisa, 50% of Americans experience a mental health issue at least once in their lifetime. In your lifetime have you seen people becoming more comfortable with the topic? Do you feel like there is still a way to go? Although we do have a way to go, I see mental health much more in the media, articles, books and even celebrities are sharing their stories. The more people talk about the struggle, the more comfortable others will be talking about their issues. I still think there are so many people that just think “get over it.” What they don’t understand is that you can’t wish away anxiety/depression. I wish more people looked at it like other diseases or aliments. If you had heart problems and the doctor had you take medicine there is zero stigma. Mental health meds are not thought of like other ailments, there is still some stigma. Lisa, was Ethan’s mental health treatment handled the same way yours was when you were seeking treatment? Because I was more knowledgeable, I think Ethan got to a doctor much sooner that I

did and I feel like there are so many more treatment options, drugs available to him. There have been more studies and the stigma is not as debilitating as it used to be. The basic process was the same, I took him to our family doctor, and she suggested some meds and getting a therapist. I remember he got a handout on teenage anxiety/depression as well that was very helpful. I don’t remember any kind of handouts when I was first diagnosed. Do you guys feel more supported knowing that the other has been through the same thing? Has it helped you guys open up with each other in any way?

Lisa: I hope that Ethan feels more supported as I try to talk to him about my experiences and let him know that although he will most likely deal with this his whole life, you get better and better at dealing with it. I also have talked to him about how there was very little help when I was his age. And that people did not talk about it at all. Ethan has shared it with his friends and with his teachers at school as it was really affecting his grades. He ever saw a GRPS “Intervention Specialist” who took Ethan’s mental health struggles very seriously. He stressed that everyone is dealing with something and when we are struggling it’s ok to reach out to our friend, family and even teachers to let them know what is going on. They were extremely empathic and worked with Ethan to help him catchup on the school work that he missed due to his anxiety/ depression. Ethan seemed very comfortable telling his teachers, I was so proud of him for sharing his story and being so well spoken about it. I was not aware of any programs or interventionist at my college.


Ethan: Yes it help us work together like others have giving us a deeper bond and made us more closer. One final question: If the you were stranded on a desert island, what three things would you want to bring with you?

Lisa: 1) Books (they calm me down and give me a zen like feeling.) 2) Tweezers – my eyebrows would grow together, and I would develop a really pretty mustache. J 3) My friend Jerry Missel – as he was an ex-marine pilot, his survival skills are amazing. He could get us off the island.

Ethan: 1) Duct Tape 2) Solar Generator 3) iPhone with a lot of storage

53



Emily Feldman WRITER/POET • SHE/HER

Wales / Megan Markel/ June 2018 ^

Dillon Luymes is a photographer specializing in conceptual street and editorial photography. They use their photography to convey personal emotions and express feeling often hard to put into words. From Grand Rapids, MI, Dillon is working on his BFA in photography, but they’ve already found a great visual voice. We sat down with Dillon to talk about how they use photography as a way to process and express their emotions.

< Emily / Deni Reyes / December 2018

55


The Train to Omskirk / Megan Markel/ June 2018 ^

Can you tell me a little bit about yourself? Where your from, where you go to school, what you aspire to in the future? I’m turning 22 this summer, I’m from St Joseph, MI, I’m currently pursuing my Master’s degree in Literature at GVSU, and I hope to go on to get my PHD and eventually work as a college professor! Your poems have recently gotten you recognition, taking home one of the prizes in the Oldenburg Writing Competition. Have you always considered yourself a poet, how did you choose your major? I became interested in English in tenth grade when I was exposed to many of the classics and given the opportunity to understand them through class discussion.


I had always found reading to be difficult and frustrating––and still do––so it was often very hard for me to finish books or even just read for fun outside of school. It was during that year that I also began writing my own poetry, both for class and for fun. I always enjoyed it but never thought it was anything good; too emotional, too personal, too abstract, maybe. But, once I started sharing some of my work I began to receive a lot of praise for it, unexpectedly. I don’t think that I would feel totally comfortable sharing the majority of my poems on social media, solely because they’re deeply personal, but I would like to continue submitting them to writing contests. I entered three of my recent poems into the Oldenburg Writing Contest at Grand Valley a few months ago and placed third in the graduate student category. It was the first writing contest I had entered in college; I had also earned a Silver Key for my poetry in the Scholastic Writing Contest during my junior year of high school. As for the Oldenburg, one of my Poetry professors recommended that I submit a poem I wrote for his class last semester, so I revised that piece and wrote two other similar poems to accompany it in a collection which I entitled “the recollection collection.” This recognition definitely gave me more confidence as a poet and has inspired me to continue writing pieces that are just dripping with emotion and feeling. Can I ask how long you’ve been dealing with anxiety? I have dealt with anxiety my whole life but didn’t recognize it as a mental [health issue] until my college years.

57


“ [Poetry] allows for so much personality and doesn’t hold the writer to any rules. You are free to do it, in any way, however you want to ” Have you always used that as a way to express yourself? When did you start making poetry as a means to work through your own life struggles? I think my poetry has always been a way for me to detox all the thoughts that I couldn’t really put into words in a conventional way. Poetry is such a flexible artform. It allows for so much personality and doesn’t hold the writer to any rules. You are free to do it, in any way, however you want to. I often write poetry solely to work through my own personal life struggles and don’t share it with anyone but myself, and I’ve found that this has been very cleansing as well. And sometimes when I do share it, it helps or comforts others who might be going through a similar thing. You recently studied abroad in England. Can you talk about how that experience helped you find your voice with your writing and help you work through things with your writing?

Ah I’m gonna cry thinking about it haha. England was by far the best experience of my life. I was in a beautiful place with my best friends, reading books, and visiting authors’ homes. It helped me in a lot of different ways, but I would say that it definitely was the leading cause into beginning to find my voice as a writer. I still would not say that I have completely found it yet. It also helped me realize that it felt good to get things off my chest through writing, and poetry was a powerful medium for it. So, I began writing more poetry and have continued to since I got back from the trip. As far as your mental health is concerned, have you encountered any stigma at all when talking about it with friends or family? I’ve experienced anxiety my whole life, and when I tried to talk to my mom about it in high school, she told me it was normal and that she experienced it too.


What I didn’t realize back then is that my mom also suffers from anxiety but doesn’t really accept that she does. I recently tried to talk to her about it again in relation to my recent ADHD diagnosis and received the same response. I think that mental illness is still so stigmatized (especially in older/middle-aged adults) that she denies that she has it. A lot of your poems are very powerful and personal, when you write these poems do you write them with the intention to share them, or are the in that moment more for your personal expression?

“It helped me realize that

it felt good to get things off my chest

through writing, and poetry was a powerful medium for it.”

I don’t share 99% of my poetry. Every single poem that I write is deeply personal, but the ones I choose to share I had written with the intention of sharing (either with my professor for an assignment or for a writing contest). The poetry that I don’t share is stuff that I write solely for myself to detox my thoughts. I don’t write very often. I don’t force a “write once a day” thing or even attempt to write when I’m just not feeling it. I have to have inspiration. A lot of times that looks like feelings surrounding a new relationship or heartache or just an abstract mess. So I don’t really like to share those ones. The Future / Megan Markel/June 2018 ^

59


Do you feel like writing these poems is a means of bringing yourself closure or peace? How does your art form help you work through these traumas? It helps me organize my thoughts, at least. I’m a very creative person but I don’t have a lot of time or opportunity to create with my hands like I wish I could sometimes. So, a lot of times I channel that energy into being creative with my writing, which leads me to writing poetry. After I finish a poem I tend to feel a little better, like I just put one piece of the puzzle together in my mind. I do a lot of selfcontemplation to make sure I’m staying self-aware, and this thinking often leads me to writing a poem. Most of the time it’s reflecting on past events that are still looming over me, so I would say that it helps me find closure and peace. How important do you think it is to have this sort of outlet when dealing with mental health? Definitely very important! It helps me cope and work through a lot of things in my life that I can’t do through any other outlet. Do you think that sharing your poetry has helped others through their own mental health issues? Yes I do. People have told me so. This is why I choose to share when I do, but even then it is only to a small audience. I would like to one day study poetry more deeply and publish some of my own, so I hope that it will help people then too. One final question: You have a cat. Can you tell us a little bit about her? Has she helped you with your mental health in any way? Yes little Thumbelina. You know I love her. I live alone in my apartment, so I adopted her so that I wouldn’t feel so lonely. She’s my emotional support animal and she lives up to it 100%. She definitely knows how to make me feel loved and whole.


Tea in the Garden / Megan Markel/June 2018 ^

61


molassas

by Emily Feldman it grows stickier thicker every time it consumes my mind. with every caress my hands sink in, engulfed by its warmth i can somehow already taste its sweetness my fingers bathe in the basin and begin to pull away with tens of stringy threads, each one growing longer, thinner until i’ve formed a nest from their fibers. it’s an endless viscoscious vat of emotion and feeling thick, stuck in its embrace my attempted escapes only fail me and on the rare occasion that i do free its grasp traces still remain i am still haunted my skin softens, yes, but it smells of burnt sugar and chamomile. yet my hands still submerge in the cistern pushing and pulling so heavily on the thick syrup that seeps through my fingers and onto the floor so much wasted and no one to care


two fingers in the jam jar1 by Emily Feldman

you must’ve thought i was kidding when i told you to stop you must’ve misunderstood me it wasn’t meant to be the “sexy” kind of stop you must not have heard me when i went on to beg louder than the first time my hips flinching in pain stop, please, seriously, you’re hurting me as your pace picked up and my body began to numb my heart sank to the bottom of your mattress stained with the words of the girls before me. i should’ve said it louder, right? i should’ve been more clear, right? you must not have known, right? i laid in silence. #MeToo

1

Title taken from “The House” by Warsan Shir

63


memory as sticky as honey by Emily Feldman

once you told me that you “didn’t get why i care so much” why i “care so much?” as if caring is a sin punishable by life in prison with no opportunity for parole yes, because eating broccoli and carrots with dinner “is not a nutritious diet.” you had said “you need some meat on those bones” while chowing on that greasy double cheeseburger that was surely clogging all the arteries of your heart that doesn’t “care so much” yes, because wearing a pink beanie and marching through Chicago for my rights, for the rights of my future daughter (who sure as hell will not have a father like you) is a sin? is “too much?” “i just don’t get why you think it matters–– she’s not going to win anyway” you told me nonchalantly, as i carefully and eagerly scribbled in the black ink circle on my absentee ballot in November of 2016. when i told you that it matters because i care, that i have a voice and i want someone to hear it, you said: “well, you just like to make things hard, don’t you” as you got in your car and drove two hours down the freeway to our hometown to cast your own vote, for the sole purpose of cancelling out mine. you even told me so. the next morning i woke up in your bed and within seconds, before i could even press the power button on the side of my phone, you chanted in my ear, “President Trump, President Trump!” silently, i gathered the pieces of myself from around your room with tears running down my face wishing it was the last time i had to do so.


“c’mon, seriously? you’re leaving already? all because you’re upset that a criminal lost the election?” you reached out to pinch the side of my waist and con me back into bed with you to erase my mind of its “ignorance,” your American-flag-printed boxers already on the floor. but i tied my other shoe and nerved up the only words my tongue could tolerate, “go fuck yourself.” “seriously? so you’re telling me you’re ‘not in the mood?’ don’t you care that i have needs?” so now all of a sudden you want me to care? a miserable year later, fighting over the fact that i overcooked your chicken, the serpent inside of you said “i will never talk to my wife the way i talk to you.” and that’s when i knew for sure. i slowly began to pack my things without you noticing why would you notice, anyway? you don’t care so much about anything except for kicking around a soccer ball and getting high. honey dripped off my lips. the bees that nest in the hive inside my lungs sting me to remind me that i’m still alive but it doesn’t burn nearly as bad as your bite had. you never liked honey. i ground my coffee beans fresh each morning, something you always made fun of me for “caring too much about” and during the final week, you hollered from the shower, “i think i like the smell of coffee now”

65



Self--Help Techniques For Coping With Mental Illness by Emmie Pombo

Living with mental illness is not easy. It’s a consistent problem without a clear solution. While treatments like medication and psychotherapy are incredibly helpful, sometimes people experiencing mental health conditions need to do more day-in and day-out to feel good or even just okay. Some common self-help suggestions people receive are to exercise, meditate and be more present, which are helpful and work for many people. However, other proven methods aren’t mentioned as often. Many of them are quick and simple techniques that can easily be added to daily routines. Finding the right coping mechanism takes time and patience, but it can enormously impact how you feel. If you haven’t had success with techniques you’ve tried, or you’re looking to add a few more to your toolkit, here are seven coping mechanisms recommended by mental health professionals worth trying out. 67


Radical Acceptance Radical acceptance is “completely and totally accepting something from the depths of your soul, with your heart and your mind,” according to Marsha Linehan (creator of dialectal behavior therapy). Included in this definition is the idea that no matter what, you cannot change a situation. For example, imagine a tornado is coming your way. Obviously, you can’t do anything to stop the tornado; that’s not possible. But if you accept the fact that it’s coming, then you can act, prepare and keep yourself safe. If you sit around trying to will the tornado to stop or pretend that there is no tornado, you’re going to be in real trouble when it comes. The same applies to mental illness. You cannot change the fact that you have a mental illness, so any time you spend trying to “get rid of it” or pretend it doesn’t exist is only draining you of valuable energy. Accept yourself. Accept your condition. Then take the necessary steps to take care of yourself.

Opposite-To-Emotion Thinking Opposite-to-emotion thinking is how it sounds: You act in the opposite way your emotions tell you to act. Say you’re feeling upset and you have the urge to isolate. Opposite-to-emotion tells you to go out and be around people—the opposite action of isolation. When you feel anxious, combat that with something calming like meditation. When you feel manic, turn to something that stabilizes you. This technique is probably one of the hardest to put into play, but if you can manage it, the results are incredible.

The 5 Senses Another effective way to use your physical space to ground you through a crisis is by employing a technique called “The 5 Senses.” Instead of focusing on a specific object, with “The 5 Senses” you run through what each of your senses is experiencing in that moment. As an example, imagine a PTSD flashback

comes on in the middle of class. Stop! Look around you. See the movement of a clock’s hands. Feel the chair beneath you. Listen to your teacher’s voice. Smell the faint aroma of the chalkboard. Chew a piece of gum. Running through your senses will take only a few seconds and will help keep you present and focused on what is real, on what is happening right now.

Deep Breathing Breathing is an annoying cliché at this point, but that’s because the best way to calm anxiety really is to breathe deeply. When battling my own anxiety, I turned to the concept of “5 3 7” breathing: Breathe in for 5 seconds Hold the breath for 3 seconds Breathe out for 7 seconds This gentle repetition sends a message to the brain that everything is okay (or it will be soon). Before long, your heart will slow its pace and you will begin to relax—sometimes without even realizing it.

Mental Reframing Mental reframing involves taking an emotion or stressor and thinking of it in a different way. Take, for example, getting stuck in traffic. Sure, you could think to yourself, “Wow, my life is horrible. I’m going to be late because of this traffic. Why does this always happen to me?” Or you can reframe that thought, which might look something like, “This traffic is bad, but I’ll still get to where I’m going. There’s nothing I can do about it, so I’ll just listen to music or an audiobook to pass the time.” Perfecting this technique can literally change your perspective in tough situations. But as you might imagine, this skill takes time and practice.


Emotion Awareness

but learning, practicing and perfecting coping techniques can help you feel better emotionally, spiritually and physically. I’ve tried all the above techniques, and they have transformed the way I cope with my mental health struggles.

If you live in denial of your emotions, it will take far longer to take care of them, because once we recognize what we’re feeling, we can tackle it or whatever is causing it. So, if you’re feeling anxious, let yourself be anxious for a couple of minutes—then meditate. If you’re feeling angry, let yourself be angry—then listen to some calming music. Be in touch with your emotions. Accept that you are feeling a certain way, let yourself feel that way and then take action to diminish unhealthy feelings. You can’t control that you have mental illness, but you can control how you respond to your symptoms. This is not simple or easy (like everything else with mental illness),

It takes strength and persistence to recover from mental illness—to keep fighting symptoms in the hopes of feeling better. Even if you feel weak or powerless against the battles you face every day, you are incredibly strong for living through them. Practical and simple methods can help you in your fight. Take these techniques into consideration, and there will be a clear change in the way you feel and live your life.

“Even if you feel weak or powerless against the battles you face every day, you are incredibly strong for living through them.”

^ Home Alone / Dillon Lumyes/ January 2019 ^


source: High Foucs Centers


Millions of Americans experience the symptoms of mental illness every year. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) estimates that 43.8 million adults in the United States deal with a mental illness annually. Around 10 million people suffer from a mental illness that severely interferes with major life activities. Sadly, [nearly] half of these mental illnesses go untreated, leaving adults and children unnecessarily suffering from symptoms. The reasons people don’t seek treatment are vast. The stigma and shame around receiving treatment can keep people from getting help. Poverty or embarrassment can also keep someone from asking for help. It may be difficult to find a therapist you like. Many medications for depression, anxiety, and other mental illnesses have undesired side effects. Mental illnesses often isolate people and make it difficult to keep searching for solutions. Unfortunately, some people give up without finding the right combination of therapies.

71


SAMPLE SPREADS

^ Patches / Anton Darius / Source: Unsplash ^


Cats Are The Unsung Heroes Of Mental Health by Renee Fabian

On a typical night, my brain races with anxiety, worried about everything from getting fired to being kicked out of therapy to whether or not my air conditioner will fall out of my window. For hours, I lie awake — until I feel two small, warm bodies cozy up next to me. My cats. As a sexual abuse survivor with PTSD, more often than not my mental health is somewhere between jumping out of my skin or unable to get off the couch. In these moments, it’s the comforting presence of my cats that helps anchor me to reality. Mine is hardly a unique experience. Many cat owners who deal with mental illness have found cats to be of enormous help as well — and a surprising amount of empirical research backs up the particular role cats can play in providing mental-health therapy. This is, of course, in part because animals in general are often of therapeutic use. “Cats, like any other animal, can help people from experiencing isolation or loneliness,” 73


says Charlotte, North Carolina-based psychologist Lisa Long. “Animals can serve as a buffer to being alone. Animals boost serotonin and can significantly improve mood.” The author with her two cats, Cricket and Peanut.A National Center for Biotechnology Information study found that spending time with an animal can increase the hormone oxytocin. Sometimes called the “cuddle chemical,” oxytocin increases pet owners’ sense of well-being. In addition, playing with a pet can increase serotonin and dopamine levels, two chemicals key in regulating mood disorders such as depression. But while many animals have documented mental health benefits, it’s dogs that seem to get all the attention. A quick Google search for emotional support dogs yields nearly 5 million results, while emotional support cats get only 2.4 million hits, with a link to a dog-specific site on the first page of results. Animal-assisted therapy providers also tend to favor dogs; among many examples, Therapet in Tyler, Texas, has more than 90 dogs on their roster and only five cats. Therapy animal provider Paws Patrol in Albany, Georgia, features more than 25 dogs and two cats. The University of California, Los Angeles’ People-Animal Connection therapy program works exclusively with dogs. The popularity of dogs in the role of therapy and emotional support may have something to do with the fact that cats are commonly viewed as anti-social, aloof, or independent. But not only is this partly rooted in widespread misconception (more on this later), the fact that cats are more independent and individual than dogs is actually the very reason they make for such valuable therapy animals. “We actually find dogs kind of limiting. The fact that dogs are so accepting and

non-judgemental is really good and helpful in the beginning of therapy,” says Linda Chassman, co-founder and executive director of Animal Assisted Therapy Programs of Colorado. “But it’s not very realistic when you’re trying to help a client who has social skills issues or who has anxiety, problems in the family, communication issues, [or] boundary issues. The dog just kind of puts up with bad behavior, whereas the cat won’t.” Chassman practices animal-assisted psychotherapy, where animals serve as an integral part of a client’s mental health treatment plan. While Chassman works with a variety of animals in her practice, including dogs, horses, and goats, it was a cat who first turned her on to the idea of working with animals more than 20 years ago. While working with severely traumatized children, Chassman’s cat Norman got involved in the process. Through learning what behaviors Norman wouldn’t tolerate — such as rough housing or yelling — the children began to understand how to interact in a healthy relationship. Like humans, cats won’t tolerate all behavior, making them useful mirrors to human interaction. Three-legged cat Sigmund, from Animal Assisted Therapy Programs of Colorado, with his buddy Jason. “They have enough interest in people, but can also assert themselves. And they have quiet dignity,” Chassman says. “They won’t let people walk on them. … I just think they’re wonderful role models for good relationships.” According to Chassman, relationship role modeling can play out in couples and family therapy when clients observe how the cat reacts to what’s happening in the room: “If you have a cat in the room, when there starts to be a fight or the tension starts to


rise, it is going to get up and want to leave, or is going to at least pick its head up and signal that it’s getting uncomfortable. It’s really easy to watch the cat’s behavior and say, ‘That’s interesting, what did the cat just do?’… And then you can say, ‘Let’s see if we can have this same conversation and have the cat in the room. Let’s see if we can talk about this in a way that allows the cat to go back to sleep.’” Cats aren’t just helpful for mirroring couple and family dynamics; they are also critical in helping people who struggle with mental illnesses such as posttraumatic stress disorder or anxiety learn about emotional regulation. “The emotional regulation is something we deal with a lot because we get a lot of kids and adults who don’t have the ability to calm themselves down,” Chassman says. “Being able to rhythmically pet the cat and just kind of focus on stroking the cat’s back, or seeing how the cat responds, can be really helpful.” Though most animals respond favorably to being pet, having clients strive to get

a cat to purr can make all the difference. Unique to cats, not only does purring provide a tangible goal for emotional regulation, it has its own health benefits as well. “[Scientists] discovered that the purring frequency of cats is a hertz rate that is equal to what they call the gamma waves, which are the meditation waves,” says Shawn Simons, headmistress of Kitty Bungalow: Charm School for Wayward Cats in Los Angeles. “So the purring of your cat actually helps to incite additional gamma rays for you. It helps to slow down your breathing. [It helps] with anxiety [and] high blood pressure. It has a meditative quality, which has extremely positive health ramifications.” Other studies, too, have illuminated the benefits of having a cat by your side. A study by the Cats Protection agency in the UK surveyed 600 participants, half of whom struggled with their mental health. They discovered that 87% of cat owners found their cats to have a positive effect on their well-being. In addition, 75


76% reported cats made regular stressors easier to manage. Cornwell College student Filipa Denis studied the benefit of human attachment with cats, and found that humans who were attached to their cats experienced great calming effects from the relationship. Cats also fulfill the human need for

touch, especially for those whose mental illness prevents them from easily forming attachments with other people. Contrary to popular belief, cats can be affectionate and attached to their humans as well. There’s kind of a misnomer that cats are not social creatures. They’ve proven through studying feral colonies that cats are actually very social and they choose to live in social groups,” says Charlottesville, Virginiabased cat behaviorist, Ami Somers. “Cats have a similar connection with people, especially when they’ve been socialized with people early on in life. They want to be with you and they want to connect with you. The truth is cats are very social and they’re very trainable and they do enjoy living with people.” For forming attachments, providing companionship, and easing mental health symptoms, cats can be an ideal emotional support animal for at-home companionship as well. “A few years ago, after I was shot, I went through hell, physically, emotionally, mentally, and socially,” says Becky Cole. “I was diagnosed with PTSD and depression. It was my cat, Simon, who got me through it all. There were nights where I wouldn’t realize I was crying in my sleep and I would wake up to him licking my tears. He was my bridge back into the human world, because he kept me from shutting down altogether. It was


almost like he was forcing his paw in the door, so I couldn’t shut it completely on everything.” Though only dogs and miniature horses qualify as service animals, cats can be considered emotional support animals, designated as “comfort animals” to those with mental illnesses. Accommodations for ESAs are not as extensive as service animals, but they do qualify for protections under the Fair Housing Act. For example, ESAs must be permitted in housing with a “no pet policy,” as landlords are required to provide “reasonable accommodation” for those who rely on an animal for support. To qualify for an ESA, a mental health professional must supply an official letter.

animal to anyone who deals with mental health issues.” My cats have become integral to my own mental health —  a nd I wouldn’t have it any other way. They make sure I get out of bed in the morning and keep me moving forward. Their playful antics bring me joy and their warm presence at night helps me fall asleep. Most importantly, their constant companionship reminds me that I have value and purpose.

“Similar to a person who needs glasses in order to be able to see, the animal serves a function to improve the psychological functioning of the person,” Long says. “In order to have [an emotional support] animal, a mental health provider would have to deem it as a necessary accommodation to help the individual through everyday life.” Cats may be often overlooked, but whether serving as a critical companion at home, an official emotional support animal, or a part of the healing process in therapy, they can greatly improve our mental health. “I have dealt with depression, anxiety, and panic attacks for over 20 years,” says Alyssa Heller. “My mental health has improved tremendously since [my cat] Shadow came into my life. … I am definitely happier, I don’t cry nearly as often, and the anxiety is much more manageable. … On the days I’m having a rough mental health episode, her presence enables me to work through the symptoms and I rarely have to call on family or friends for assistance anymore. I highly recommend a cat as a companion

77


“I constantly wonder what happens to a black girl who was too anxious to ever feel like magic�

^ Friends with Benefits / Dillon Luymes / January 2019 ^

Poem converted from slam. Source: Write About Now

1


Friends with Benefits1 by Jae Nichelle

so my anxiety and I have what some people might call a friends-with-benefits relationship we have no love for each other but she’s still just like with me sometimes we moved in together some years ago we have inside jokes like when I say I’m gonna talk to that person over there my anxiety looks at me and is like bitch please my anxiety is the reason I didn’t talk to you she’s possessive she doesn’t like me talking to other people she’s irrational because of her I’ll take the long way to my building to avoid someone I already pass by twice because I don’t know if it’s acceptable to say hey a third time because of her I don’t correct people at restaurants who get my order wrong I just eat it because you know maybe a sweet potato fries are what I wanted but the broccoli you gave me is what I needed I take the long way to my building to avoid someone who kind of look like my ex-boyfriend because whenever I hand her the Ox courts she makes sure to play back all the times he told me no one else would ever want me because of her I still think no one else will ever want me I constantly wonder what happens to a black girl who was too anxious to ever feel like magic can she still fly can she still be fly with wings that trim bulk and she forgets the lifestyle of an ant that feeling that no matter what she does she is in danger of being crushed and my anxiety doesn’t

like to be made into metaphors but what I’m trying to say is she’s constantly reminded me of how easy I am to crush as I speak I am pushing against her weights on my shoulders and that is why I shake sometimes I have to fight to stand up straight stop Rocking she and I picked out this outfit together something that drives fast if I am sweating it is because doing this poem feels like fighting a boxing match that you can’t even see an eye and determined to knock her in fighting for control of our house for years fighting not to crack stop rocking don’t shake breeze I think the reason my relationships don’t work out is because no one knows they’re signing up for a threesome I understand I know how hard it is to live with both of us when we don’t like feeling out of control when we don’t handle conflict well when we don’t handle being yelled at well when everything you say to us will be repeated and deconstructed and analyzed in our head a million times after and if I am silent for a while it is because I have to fight with her before I can fight with you I’ve tried to cut her off before I cannot we do not handle separation well because of our parents I mean our ex I mean our friends breathe so I guess my anxiety and I have just learned to live together she’s the longest relationship I have ever had and as everyone leaves she is the only relationship that I can count on. 79


Source: Better Health Channel (DHHS Victoria)


Provided they receive appropriate ongoing support and treatment, most people with mental illness recover well and are able to lead fulfilling lives in the community. With appropriate support and treatment, the most likely outcomes for specific conditions are: Anxiety disorders – the majority of people will improve over time. Bipolar disorder – about 80 per cent of people will improve. Schizophrenia – about 60 per cent of people with schizophrenia will improve and can live independently with support. About 20 per cent of those diagnosed with schizophrenia will have an episode or two, and then never experience symptoms again. For another 20 per cent, symptoms are more persistent, treatments are less effective and greater support services are needed.



How I Dug Myself Out of the Millennial Mental Health Decline by David Ly Khim

Two and a half years ago, I picked up my life and moved 3,000 miles from Los Angeles to Boston (it turns out there’s another change coming up soon). It’s not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but I was 23 at the time and while starting from a blank slate had its upsides, there were plenty of hardships to work through. After meeting more people from diverse backgrounds, I’ve realized that the decision to relocate far away from loved ones is a a common decision many people my age make. We connected on that mutual experience of rebuilding a life in a new city and shared stories of dark times with our mental health. I’m 26 now and over the last couple of years I’ve developed a new support network, made new lifelong friends, found mentors, and built my career while fighting through challenges that many 20-something year olds are increasingly coping with: depression, loneliness, anxiety, existential crises, big life decisions. These problems weren’t solely attributed to the cross-country move.

83


Rather, the relocation provided many moments of solitude that allowed two decades of bottled up emotions and unhealthy thoughts to surface and force me to deal with them. Upon reflecting on the last few years, this seems to be a good time to document what I’ve learned and what I’ve done that helped me get to a better place mentally and emotionally. To make things more interesting, I was recently faced with another life-changing decision to move to another country. I said yes. My next challenge is to apply these lessons to the next chapter of my life to cope with another significant change. To be clear, this isn’t a “13 things you need to do” type of post. These are things that have helped me and hopefully, these learnings will help you or someone you know improve your own situations. Here are the foundational pillars I’ve built and bad habits I’ve removed from my life that improved my mental health.

I limit social media exposure. I’ve uninstalled Facebook, Twitter, and Snapchat from my phone and only use Instagram which provides more than enough psychological rewiring I’d like to have in my life (if you aren’t sure what I mean by that, I recommend reading the book Hooked by Nir Eyal). I can access Facebook and Twitter on my laptop Chrome browser, but I use StayFocusd to cap myself at ten minutes a day. However, when I do log into Facebook, I don’t see any one’s updates because I use News Feed Eradicator. So I end up spending less than two minutes there. Why do I limit my time on social media? Numerous studies have shown that an increase in depression, anxiety, and loneliness can be attributed to social media. Facebook has even addressed this and is trying to change how their platform affects the lives of their users (that’s us).

The book Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It by Kamal Ravikant helped get me through that depression.

I stopped using dating apps. This was a big one. At every idle moment, I had a habit of pulling out my phone, opening a dating app, and swiping. I’d often swipe before going to sleep, lose track of time, and end up sleeping later than I had planned. I rarely got matches, which got my mind tumbling down a rabbit hole analyzing what was wrong with me. Even when I did get a match, I would dwell on crafting the perfect message and wonder if a girl would respond to me or why she never responded. Was it me? Am I not attractive? Maybe my profile isn’t good enough. Maybe I’m not good enough. From the app taking up too much time to matches causing unneeded stress, dating apps became toxic to my happiness so I removed them from my life. (I’m aware dating apps have worked for some people, including my friends, and I respect that. They just didn’t work for me.)

I put my phone away. A study by Andrew K. Przybylski and Netta Weinstein at University of Essay has shown that just having a phone in view during a conversation makes it more difficult to develop strong interpersonal connections. I don’t look at my phone when I’m waiting for a friend or waiting for an order at Starbucks. I silence my phone and put it in my pocket and out of sight before our conversation. If I forget to silence it and get a notification, I apologize and let them know if I need to respond. Once I respond, I put my phone away. It’s also just polite to pay attention to the person you’re with. You’re with them because you want to spend time with them, right? If you’re not sure why you’re spending time with them, that takes me to my next point.


I say no. And I don’t mind changing a ‘yes’ to a ‘no.’ This applies to both my personal and professional life. I say no to side projects. If I do take on an extra project and circumstances change where working on that extra project affects the quality of my primary work, I’ll let the team know I can’t help anymore. (Of course, if me leaving that project is detrimental to its success, I’ll see it through as best I can.) Likewise, I often say no to outings. If I do go to an outing and realize I’m not having fun, I leave and ignore any social and internal pressure to stay. If I’m not excited about something, if I don’t enjoy something, if I don’t want to do something, I say no. What do I do with all that free time?

I spend time doing nothing. Sometimes, I’ll go to a coffee shop, order a hot tea, then sit and drink my tea. That’s it. I’m alone. No phone. No laptop. No book. I people watch. I stare into space. I meditate. I choose something to think about and focus on that. It’s great for solving problems and decompressing.

I read more books. Online content generally falls into one of three things: news about the economy or politics, entertainment, or useful and applicable information. I’ve almost completely removed the first two from my reading. News about the economy and politics began to take up a lot of time and energy. I realized I don’t have to try to keep up with every plot twist. I realized that if something’s important, it’ll get to me. Contrary to blog posts, books generally

take more time and effort and the ones that have stood the test of time are often the ones worth reading. I attribute a lot of my personal and professional growth to books.

I meditate. I started using Headspace three years ago, but I’ve stopped using apps. I check-in with myself regularly moment-to-moment. I actively gauge how I react to things and make sure I’m calm and level-headed in my body language, tone of voice, and phrasing. In contrast to using a meditation app in a social vacuum, it’s when the going gets tough in daily life that a meditative practice matters most.


I’m not perfect, but building meditation into an active part of my mind’s operating system has helped me maintain a clear mind through a lot of difficult situations and challenges.

I don’t own a lot of stuff. I buy few things and I throw many things away. Each month, I do an informal audit of my room to see what I haven’t used or don’t need. I throw things away and I donate clothes. I wear almost the same thing everyday. When I evaluate whether or not to buy something, I’m honest about how often I’ll use it, how long it’ll last, how much I really want it, and whether I really need it. To me, having fewer things equates to fewer things to think about or manage.

I engage in less small talk. Two things I avoid in conversations: gossip and topics that aren’t intellectually stimulating to me. If a group spends more than five minutes talking about a TV show or someone else’s personal life, I either exit the conversation, change the topic, or don’t engage. To get past those conversations, I’ve learned to do two things: Asking questions to steer the conversation toward topics with more substance that other person would also be interested in and Ending conversations and being comfortable with that decision. I’m very focused on growing as a person and learning to direct conversation has saved me a lot of time from talking about things that don’t help me grow.

I spend more time with people I care about. I prioritize my family and the friendships I value and have gotten better at making plans with them. It could be as simple as getting coffee or brunch, going for a walk, or hanging out at someone’s apartment. I’ve gotten better at not flaking when I make plans. When we meet

up, my phone is away and I’m present. I really listen to what they say and ask a ton of questions. I want them to know and see that I appreciate them. I have a separate savings account to fund travel and meals to visit friends and family.

I moderate my drinking. This is self explanatory. I rarely drink now and if I do, it’s one drink, like an old fashioned or an IPA.Less drinking means no time spent recovering from a hangover, better workouts, better sleep, more focus, and less money spent. And I still have fun when I’m out. :)

I work out regularly. I work out up to five times a week and workouts range from 30 minutes to two hours. I’m not trying to become a fitness influencer or a model on Instagram. Not planning to compete in a bodybuilding or weightlifting competition. Exercise keeps my operating system sharp. Healthy body and mind = good life. It also improves my discipline which pays dividends in other aspects of life. As Jocko Willink, a decorated retired Navy SEAL officer, says, “Discipline equals freedom.”

I focus on my work and core purpose. I’m focused on achieving my personal and professional goals and my work gets me closer to achieving those goals. To others, it seems like work. To me, it’s how I want to spend my life. I don’t care about work life balance. I care about work life harmony. There will be times when I may have to work from 8am to 7pm. There will be times when I’ll stop working at 5pm. There will be times when I’ll work on a project until 9pm on weeknights and all weekend. There will be times when I can take two weeks of vacation and not worry about work. Depending on the context of my life at that moment, I’ve learned that none of those scenarios are inherently “bad”. You don’t need to beat yourself up for


“working too much” or “not working enough”. It’s okay to be in those scenarios.

If there’s one thing you take away from this… The overarching theme I’ve applied to myself is the concept of euthymia which I learned from Ryan Holiday. A term from ancient Greek philosophy, euthymia could be described as cheerfulness where cheerfulness isn’t the same as pleasure, but “a condition according to which the soul lives calmly and steadily, being disturbed by no fear, or superstition, or other passion.” In his essay on tranquility, Seneca defines euthymia as,“believing in yourself and trusting that you are on the right path, and not being in doubt by following the myriad footpaths of those wandering in every direction.” Do not be disturbed by things out of your control. Focus on yourself and your path. Remove toxic things from your life. Build foundational pillars for the life you aspire to live. Then, go live it.

87








Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.