Written & designed by: Jennifer Kumer www.jenniferkumer.com E: jennkumer@gmail.com T: +31 (0)64 406 20 72
All rights reserved. No part of this guidebook may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copywrite owners. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this guidebook for yourself or others, the author assume no responsibility for your actions.
“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” - Joseph Campbell
WELCOME! Hello dear one, You’re entering the world of empathic wisdom and selfdiscovery. A world that connects your deep inner knowing and intuition with answers that can only be found within. These games and practices help you cultivate emotional literacy to face any situation you may encounter in life with openness and grace. I sincerely hope this card deck becomes a supportive companion on your journey. Enjoy the process! With love, Jennifer
BEFORE YOU START: 1. Make sure you’re in a nice and relaxed environment. 2. Invite people who are enthusiastic and open to the experience. 3. Heighten your awareness around judgements towards yourself and others. 4. Keep in mind that self-discovery has no destination. 5. Take your time to process insights and experiences afterwards.
HOW TO USE: You can use the card deck however you’d like! If you are inventive and deeply fascinated by the world of emotional literacy, like me, you might feel inspired to add in your own twists. You have full permission from me to experiment to your heart’s content!
The whole intention behind this project is to support the education of emotional intelligence through playful enquiry. We have a growing community of trainers, facilitators, healers and therapists from different modalities using the deck at festivals, retreats, workshops and private practices. As you discover different ways to use the deck, please join us and contribute your voice through the website. This guidebook is a compilation of games, tools and practices that has inspired me on my personal healing journey. Some have been adapted and some directly sourced. They continue to serve me personally and professionally everyday. I encourage you to experience them all and come to your own conclusions. Know that some of the games and practices will serve you more than others, depending on where you are in life and your current state of mind. There is something here for everyone in this collection. Follow your curiosity and see you on the other side!
INDEX: Below you’ll find a list of games & practices divided into 3 setups.
SOLO 1. INTUITIVE GUIDANCE 2. FREEWRITE 3. MANIFEST A WISH
DUO 4. RESOLVING POLARITIES 5. REVEAL YOURSELF 6. PAST PRESENT FUTURE 7. EMOTIONAL CYCLE
GROUP 8. EMOTIONAL THEATER 9. CO-CREATIVE STORYTELLING
CATEGORIES: Below you’ll find the 5 types of experiences that the deck can be used for. Affirmation - Self-empowerment, intention-setting & motivation Communications - Relational intimacy, trust-building & emotional safety Creativity - Play, imagination & inspiration Embodiment - Grounding, spaciousness & non-verbal connection Enquiry - Insight, integration & self-discovery Depending how you use the deck, you can combine the games & practices to facilitate a larger group or you can use them for yourself or with friends. Different game combinations will generate different results. The categories gives a snapshot of the emotional journey of the practice. Play with the categories above to discover varied experiences with the deck. Affirmation: Affirmation boosts self love, motivation and confidence. These games & practices support you to set intentions, get clear on visions and surrender in trust. Communications: Communications deepen your connection with others. These games & practices provide simple structures for authentic relating and trust-building between people. Creativity: Creativity cultivates your imagination and inspiration. These games & practices help you reconnect with feelings of curiosity, playfulness and enthusiasm. Embodiment: Embodiment explores the somatic and non-verbal expressions of emotions. These games & practices help you ground the body, with a feeling of inner spaciousness and interconnectedness. Enquiry: Enquiry gives you direct insight into your beliefs and behavior patterns. These games & practices allow you to take ownership of your life through understanding your emotional needs and decision-making process. *The categories that are in use for each practice are highlighted above each title.
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
INTUITIVE GUIDANCE Intention: Receive insights on a specific situation or area of life you wish guidance on.
Instructions:
Solo
± 15 min
1. Start by grounding yourself. Close your eyes, take a deep breathe and shuffle the deck. 2. Set an intention where you’d like to focus. Identify an area in your life where you’d like support. (Life/family/love/career...etc). 3. Spread the cards out face down. Pick one or multiple cards as you repeat the following question: “What insight does this card(s) bring me in relation to the focus?” 4. Journal what insights comes up as you answer that question for yourself. Write without pause for at least a minute. Only read your writing after you’ve finished. Example: “When I think about my family and feeling angry, I realize…” 5. BONUS: Translate your new insight into action. List the tangible things you are inspired to act on when you fully embrace this insight. Example: Next time I am with my parents, I’ll tell them I love you each time I get angry at them.
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
FREEWRITE Intention: Explore and uncover insights about your patterned behaviors and emotional needs.
Instructions:
Solo
± 10 min
1. Shuffle the deck and draw a card. Example: “I’m feeling lazy.” 2. Give yourself half a minute to connect with the card. 3. Allow your stream of consciousness to write freely without pause. Use the following sentence stems to guide you: • I FEEL [emotion on the card] WHEN… Example: I feel lazy when I am not physically active or am isolated from people. • WHEN I FEEL [emotion on the card] I TEND TO… Example: When I feel lazy I tend to snuggle up in bed, snack and binge-watch youtube videos. • WHEN I FEEL [emotion on the card] I NEED… Example: When I feel lazy I need to stay away from social media, go for a walk, call up a friend or take a few deep breaths.
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
MANIFEST A WISH Intention: Identify and manifest a wish by planning steps to overcome inner obstacles.
Instructions
Solo
± 20 min
1. Write down a wish. Feel into what you’d like to manifest in your life. Get concrete and describe it in 4–6 words. It should be challenging enough and yet achievable in the near future. Example: I want to clean up my house. 2. Go through the deck and select the cards that best embody the feelings you’ll have when you achieve this wish. Imagine the fulfillment of your wish. The perfect scenario where everything works out exactly as you wanted it to. 3. Write down as much detail as you can. Try not to overthink and let these emotions guide you. Example: I feel determined and proud after completing the cleaning room-by-room. 4. Select cards that represent emotional obstacles in the way of the wish. Pick out cards where you feel resistance and fear come up. Example: When I get home late, I feel exhausted. Cleaning up isn’t fun and I get bored. 5. Now set your intentions and write down your action steps. For each emotional obstacle you identified, create your when/then plan. Example: When I feel exhausted, then I’ll give into it and get some rest. When I feel bored, then I’ll find motivation by reminding myself of the positive feelings that come up when the house is clean.
Tips
• Use the cards as reminders to anchor your motivation and resolution going forward. • Repeat the process periodically to reflect on your progress.
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
RESOLVING POLARITIES Intention: Explore the polarities of emotion and reflect on their importance as a whole.
Instructions:
Duo
± 25 min
1. Each person draws a card. Shuffle and spread the cards face down. Draw a card then set the rest of the deck aside. Connect with the card you drew. 2. One person starts by sharing, “where is this emotion present in my life today?” (3-5 minutes each) Set the timer for each person to share without interruption. Once the person finishes, switch to the other and do the same. 3. Next, the person who started answers the question “where is the opposite of the emotion on my card also present in my life?” (3-5 minutes each) Set the timer for each person to share without interruption. Once the person finishes, switch to the other and do the same. 4. Finally, each person takes a turn to answer “how do I feel when I allow these two emotions to be felt simultaneously?” (3-5 minutes each)
Tips
• Give the other person time and space to talk freely without interrupting or giving advice. • Wait a few more moments after they finish speaking to see if more wants to be shared. • Trust your instinct and share what immediately comes up. Let yourself be surprised by your own answers.
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
REVEAL YOURSELF Intention: Gain a deeper understanding of yourself and others through the practice of free association.
Instructions:
Duo
± 10 min
1. This practice uses the deck to give each person an opportunity to run through card by card and share their association with each of the emotions. 2. With the card deck facing down one person starts. Set a timer for 5 minutes. 3. One by one, pick cards from the deck and share your association with that emotion using the following prompt words or choose your own. (5 minutes each) I feel [emotion on the card] about/when/that/for… Example: “I feel joyful when I think about my date tonight.” “I feel grateful for the beautiful home I live in.” 5. Once you finish speaking to the emotion, pick the next card and repeat the process again. Place the used cards facing up to form another pile. 6. Pass the remaining deck and switch to the other person.
Tips
• • • •
It’s important to feel and speak intuitively during this exercise. When you get stuck try a different prompt word or move on to the next card. Practicing listening when the other person is speaking. Speak whatever comes up without judgement, even if it doesn’t make sense!
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
PAST PRESENT FUTURE Intention: Gain insight into your past and set intention for your future emotional development.
Instructions:
Duo
± 30 min
1.F or this practice, pick one person to be A and the other person to be B. Shuffle and spread the deck then have person A draw a card. 2. Person A: Share your relationship with this emotion from the past. (3 minutes) The person who starts (A), shares: How did you experience it growing up? How did your parents express this emotion? 3. Person B: Repeat what you heard. (2 minutes) The person who listened (B), repeats back what they heard person A share. Don’t share how it impacted you or what it reminded you of, simply repeat back what you heard person A say. 4.Person A: Share about the present. (3 minutes) What is your relationship with this emotion currently? How have you been in touch with this feeling recently? 5. Person B: Share the personal impact. (2 minutes) Take a moment to let A know how their sharing impacted you personally. This can be on a physical, emotional, or intellectual level. 6. Person A: Share about the future. (3 minutes) How would you like to relate with this emotion in the future? What are some things you can incorporate to embrace this emotion even further? 7. Person B: Share your appreciation for person A based on what they shared. (2 minutes) Take a moment to share a few things that resonated with you as you were listening. Be supportive and offer your appreciation. 8. Once you’ve completed one cycle, switch roles and repeat the same process.
Tips
• Stay present and open. Allow the words of the other person to touch you. • When giving feedback, stick with the I-format: “I felt/I heard/I observe…etc.” • Close the game with a gesture of gratitude, for example, give each other a hug!
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
EMOTIONAL CYCLE Intention: Understand how our emotions relate and interface with each other as part of a larger system.
Instructions:
Duo
± 20 min
1. Each person draws 3 cards. Shuffle the deck face down. Spread it out and pick 3 cards intuitively. 2. Reorder the 3 cards in a way that symbolizes an emotional cycle in your life. Take a moment to reflect and connect with each card. Think about how these emotions relate in the order that you’ve placed them in. Example: “I’m feeling depressed. I’m feeling safe. I’m feeling playful.” 3. One person starts and shares their interpretation. (5 minutes each) How does each card tells a story about that phase of the cycle? How does this cycle show up in your life today? Once complete, switch to the other person. 4.Reverse the order and do the same. (5 minutes each) Begin with the last card and tell a story about how they relate now. How does the reversed order also show up in your life today? 5. Finally, each person takes a moment to share any additional insights. Close the game with a gesture of gratitude, for example, give each other a hug!
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
CO-CREATIVE STORYTELLING Intention: Co-create a narrative as a group, while gaining insights into the emotional dimensions of a story.
Instructions:
Group
± 30 min
(*Depends on group size.)
1. The facilitator instructs each person in the group to draw a card. Spread the cards out face down and ask each person to draw a card. Then, ask them, with card in hand, to form a straight line facing you. The group will now co-create a story from beginning to end based on everyone’s cards. 2. Ask for a volunteer: “Who has a good beginning of a story?” Ask this person to step forward and begin a new line. Invite them to speak out the idea in a concise sentence that is easily memorized. The sentence should always include the emotion on the card. Example: Once upon a time, there was a sad king. 3. Next, ask for another volunteer: “Who has a good end to this story?” Ask this person to stand at the end of the newly formed line and share his or her idea. Again, help simplify their sentences so they can be easily memorized. 4. Ask the first volunteer to repeat their sentence followed by the sentence of the second volunteer. 5. Invite the next person to fill-in another sentence in the story. One by one, participants join the new line, pick their spot, and add their sentence to the story. Important to note, the story is repeated from beginning to end each time a new sentence is added. 6. Repeat the same process, one person at a time until the story is complete. Be aware of the last few people have to be more conscious of tying the story together. For example, fill-in missing plots and emotional motives to make the story compelling. 7. Finally, the complete story is performed one last time from start to end. • Encourage everyone to let go, have fun and be imaginative!
Tips
• Invite people to be theatrical! Use body language and facial expressions to amplify the story and playfulness.
Affirmation
Communications
Creativity
Embodiment
Enquiry
EMOTIONAL THEATER Intention: Use embodiment to invite emotional fluidity and playfulness into everyday life.
Instructions:
Group
± 30 min
(*Depends on group size.)
Round 1: Group journey The facilitator instructs the group to move around the space. While standing, ask the group to close their eyes, take a deep breathe and connect with what’s truly alive for them. Invite them to move around the space welcoming any movement and sound that feels connected to their current state. The facilitator picks 3-5 cards. These cards will guide the group exercise. The facilitator announces each emotion, one by one, inviting the group to fully embody the expression of that emotion. Participants are free to engage others through eye contact, non-verbal expressions or physical contact. Round 2: YOU-nique expression Each person draws a card from the deck and then form the group in a circle. Ask each person not reveal their card to others. One by one, each person embodys the emotion on the card through sound and movement. Once the person has expressed their emotion, go clockwise to the next person until the circle is complete. Feel free to invite the participants to play using the center of the cirlcle. Collect the cards and reshuffle the deck once complete. Round 3: Catch-the-wave Ask each person to draw a new card and keep the card to themselves and form a new circle. One person starts by expressing that emotion through sound and movement. This starts a wave beginning from the person to the right who copies it. This continues until it reaches back to the original person. The person who started the emotion then repeats it once more. This is critical because it signals the end of a wave and cues the next person to start. The facilitator needs to make sure the transitions are done without pause. Continue until everyone in the circle has initiated an emotional wave.
Tips
• The entire practice is non-verbal, i.e. we lovingly discourage the use of words. • Part of the fun is that the actual emotions on the cards are never revealed. • At the end, invite people to share what came up during the practice.
CREDITS: Manifest a Wish is based on the WOOP technique developed by professor Gabrielle Oettingen Resolving Polarities is based on the teachings of non-duality by Andy Chaleff Reveal Yourself is inspired by the psychoanalytic technique Free Association developed by Sigmund Freud Past Present Future is inspired by the practices of Authentic Relating Emotional Theater is inspired by OBLISS the work of Layla Martin Co-creative Storytelling is inspired by the Mezrab Storytelling School
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: I would like to thank all the ambassadors, Kickstarter backers, mentors, family and friends for believing in my passion and encouraging me to manifest my vision. This project wouldn’t have been birthed into the world without your financial, emotional and spiritual support.
ABOUT JENNIFER: Jennifer Kumer is a visual artist, spiritual activist, self-publisher, and trained creativity coach devoted to helping empaths heal & thrive through embodying their full creative potential. She lives a nomadic lifestyle, traveling and creating from artist residencies around the world whilst giving talks and workshops based on the Empathic Wisdom Cards.
ONLINE GUIDEBOOK: The Empathic Wisdom Cards guidebook is available online at: www.jenniferkumer.com/reousrces. Add your game or practice to the guidebook! The online space serves as an open-source platform where people can contribute ideas, share games & practices, and learn from each other.
STAY UPDATED: Visit www.jenniferkumer.com and sign up to my newsletter to receive updates on new games & practices, workshops, events and offerings. You can also follow me on Facebook and Instagram.
CONTACT: Interested in a workshop or in search of a creative mentor? Contact me at: jennkumer@gmail.com +31 0644062072