8 minute read
Parenting Pearls
Parenting Pearls Make the Summer a Splashing Success
By Sara Rayvych, MSEd
As the summer approaches, the pool is usually one of the first things kids think about. Swimming and water play is truly one of the joys of summer. Along with water comes the need for extra safety measures and awareness. As parents, we are all aware that water comes with its own set of precautions, but as the proud mother of two lifeguards, I’ve gained a new appreciation and awareness.
I’d like to thank the lifeguards that took the time to review this article and added their insights. I just found out that Bracha Goetz has a new book on water safety, Let’s Swim Safely, designed for the youngest of swimmers. I haven’t had a chance to thoroughly review it, but it’s worth checking out on your next trip to the bookstore.
Constant Supervision
It is never safe to leave children of any age alone near water, irrelevant of how little water is present. This applies to everything from a bathtub to a pool. In fact, nobody should swim alone. Even adults should have a buddy or someone with them. There are too many stories of tragedies to be lenient with this rule. Sadly, there have even been deaths recorded in men’s mikvaos because someone was alone when a medical emergency occurred.
After swimming, the pool should be drained, locked or otherwise secured. Don’t leave even a baby pool with water in it unattended. The same applies to baths or anywhere water is gathered. Ensure nobody, not even a neighbor’s child, has access to your child’s pool. Other parents may allow their child to play outside unaware there is water present.
Inflatables, water wings, and other items are not a substitute for adult supervision. Ironically, some of those very items are considered dangerous in the water despite how they’re marketed. I know from my sons that there are very good reasons why pools limit certain pool toys and items. Others are allowed in but require extra vigilance. It’s a shame that they’re marketed as they are.
Learn the Signs
Many of us have seen drownings depicted in movies or television. As the victim desperately screams for help, their arms flail as they splash and make a scene. The movies show drownings just about as inaccurately as they portray Orthodox Jews. I never knew differently until a homeschooler put out a public service announcement after the unfortunate drowning of a relative of hers. The young man was an excellent swimmer and drowned surrounded by family as nobody knew that he was struggling. It is worthwhile to watch a video online showing how someone actually looks when they’re having trouble. You want to know the first signs of trouble and daven you never need to use it.
Professional Lifeguards
Parents are wonderful and love their children to no end. Parents, though, are not substitutes for a lifeguard. I’ve been very impressed with seeing how my sons have learned the signs of distress and know the safest way to help. An untrained eye is no substitute for a professional.
I’ve been called to see if my children are available for pool parties as many parents recognize that having a lifeguard present is the safest way to host others in your pool. On the other hand, I’ve had parents argue with me that they don’t really need that much professional supervision since parents will be present. Parents generally don’t watch swimmers as carefully as a lifeguard, and they’re rarely able to spot the first signs of danger, chas v’shalom. Parents cannot take the place of a trained lifeguard. I’ve been impressed when rebbeim or parents added a second lifeguard because they knew it was safest, and I have been disappointed when adults have refused to properly staff their pools. Don’t allow your child to swim unless there is proper supervision.
Lifeguards are the trained staff and authority at the pool, and children should be taught to listen to the lifeguards. Lifeguards may be predominantly teenagers but they need to be taken seriously. If the lifeguard asks them to stop running, leave the pool or stop their game, then they need to listen. You would never encourage your child to disregard an authority figure, and the pool’s lifeguard is no different. It’s for your child’s safety and benefit that they listen to the ones trying to keep them safe.
Often, kids don’t understand the rules and try to flaunt them. Many water toys, games or activities are not permitted, and kids will try to ignore the rule. You’d be surprised how many kids try to dive, head first, into shallow water and then argue with the lifeguard that tries to stop them. Some games, such as contests to hold your breath underwater, seem innocent to children but are actually a serious potential danger. Kids jump into the water without looking, potentially landing on another child. Some toys increase the risk of drowning. These are risks that kids don’t understand but trained lifeguards are taught to watch out for. Your child shouldn’t ignore rules they don’t understand. Many lifeguards won’t mind explaining the reason behind the rules, and kids can ask but children should follow the safety rules whether they understand them or not.
Children should never distract or annoy a lifeguard on duty. You would think this would be obvious, but I’m shocked each year how many kids think it’s funny to block the lifeguard’s view, argue with them or otherwise take their attention away from the pool. If a child or adult thinks they were treated unfairly, then they can speak to the lifeguard later when he/she is off duty or speak to someone higher up. They shouldn’t argue their point while the guard is on duty. Children should know they can go to a lifeguard if they need assistance but they should never play around with the lifeguard’s view or attention.
Water Safety
Parents have the important role of teaching children water safety. Just like teaching how to safely cross the street, stranger danger and locking up poisons, water safety is no different. Children should be taught not to play near water where they, chas v’shalom, have the risk of falling or injuries. It can be helpful to remind children again, especially little ones, of the rules when they’re near the water.
Children need to be taught how to swim or at least how to safely manage in the water. Besides being fun, knowing how to swim is an important safety skill. While not everyone can afford swim lessons, it is worth at least looking into if you see your child is not safe around water. The price may be more affordable than you thought. It’s an investment in their safety, and a few lessons can make a difference. Do not rely on water wings, floaties or other water devices. They’re generally not approved as water safety devices and are not a replacement
for proper supervision. Many water toys are actually more of a hazard than a safety device, and a parent should never remove their gaze from their child, even if they’re right next to them in the water. Some of these items are either discouraged or banned in public pools for a reason. If the device has the approval of the Coast Guard, then the item can be considered more of a safety device than a toy but it still doesn’t negate the need for proper supervision.
A properly approved life jacket/ vest is different from a water toy. Children that are boating or doing other water activities should be encouraged to wear their life vest, even if they feel foolish looking. In fact, it’s the law in New York for many water activities and boats. Even a proficient swimmer can benefit from this extra level of protection. There are too many things that can happen for a person to think accidents won’t happen to them, only to others. Like a helmet, they should be secured properly and the right size for your child. Wearing one yourself shows your child, by example, that water safety really is important to you, too. Adults need to be safe in the water, as well. Each year we hear of tragedies, lo aleinu, many to adults that knew how to swim. Let’s teach by example and protect ourselves in the process.
Beaches
I am not discussing any halachic issues that may arise at the beach. What I can discuss is how beautiful, peaceful and enjoyable the beach is for people of all ages. A walk or bike ride on the boardwalk is not only an enjoyable way to exercise but also a fun activity for chol hamoed or school breaks. We are fortunate to live close to so many beaches.
What is less known is that the water at the beach is very different
from pool water. The ocean water is far more unpredictable and far more dangerous. The difference is so great that beach lifeguards are required to have special certification and equipment, over and above what pool lifeguards are required to maintain. Nobody, neither children nor adults, should ever enter the water at a beach without a lifeguard present. Never swim or enter the water outside the area that is designated for swimming or outside the area patrolled by the lifeguard. Wanting a private swim may seem like fun or more tznius but it’s not safe. As gentle and peaceful as the water may appear, sadly, it can be misleading, and each year we hear of tragedies, may Hashem protect us.
Water play is one of the best parts of summer. Kids and adults alike look forward to a cool dip in the pool on a hot day. It’s great exercise and a wonderful way to relax. Let’s do all we can to ensure the water remains a fun and enjoyable experience as we teach our children to understand and respect the risks that come with the fun.
Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at RayvychHomeschool@gmail.com.
