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JUNE 17, 2021 | The Jewish Home
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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home
Dating Dialogue
What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters
Dear Navidaters,
I need some advice. I’m a 23-year-old single woman with a good job and a college degree. I’m not yeshivish but not really modern. I’m put-together and ambitious. I’m mature and grounded, and have a very positive outlook on life. But...my parents got divorced (more than 15 years ago). I’m not asking for
much; just a solid intelligent guy with a stable career who davens three times a day and learns a few times a week. I want an ambitious man who will support his wife and family. Is that too much to ask for? I find that there are so few men who exist with this criteria, and the ones who are available don’t hear about me. They get so many resumes, and because I don’t come from a perfect family, I get left behind. I’ve tried single events, dating websites, met with many shadchans, etc. I put myself out there. Yet, I still don’t get dates. I haven’t gone out in over a year. I’ve only dated a few men, and most were one-and-dones. I know for a fact that if I met a guy naturally, he’d want to date me; regardless of my parents’ marital status. But, all the mechitzas and rules of “modesty” in the Orthodox world prevent singles from meeting. Of course, I’m very happy and living my life to the fullest. However, I’d like to have a companion in life. We’re built to crave a relationship. So, I’m asking you for advice. This system is leaving good women like myself behind. It needs a solution and more than a perek of Tehillim. Chana*
Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.
