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HEEL PARTY
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Always something g oing on... N D AY S {SIceUPics’ Legendary 2-4-1
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NIGHT
Do you have what it takes to be our next dancer?
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On-site Undie Sale!
hosted by LADY GODIVA
AWESOME DRINK SPECIALS!
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{S AT U R D AY S 4pm-9pm
Buy a $5 cup of Miller Light or Bud Lite and get 50¢ REFILLS!!!
For the latest events, specials and show times, visit:
/icepics t www.icepicsvideobar.com
SATURDAY SHOWS @ 10pm
A Touch of Starring
MAY 5th & MAY 19th
Maraya Jordan MAY 12 & MAY 26th
COCKTAILS DURING SATURDAY SHOWS!
SUNDAY MAY 20th @ 8:30pm
Divas After Dark
FAGTV Starring
DIANNA K. SHANE A multi-media drag extravaganza with live numbers and special guests!
TUESDAY MAY 22nd @9pm
SUNDAY, MAY 27th THE MEN OF @ 8:30pm
STRUT ALL-MALE REVIEW $4 STOLI DRINKS! Hosted by
OLIVER TOWN
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602.267.8707 3108 East McDowell
Daily, 10am to 4pm
RED DEVIL next door for call-in lunch & food orders!
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PHOENIX PRIDE PARADE
AMSTERDAM AFTER-PRIDE PARTY
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PHOENIX PRIDE FESTIVAL
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3819 North 3rd Street Suite 26, Phoenix, AZ 85012
(602) 308-4662 • Fax (602) 271-0939 www.IONAZ.com
ionarizona@me.com
Publisher / FOUNDER Jack M. Tesorero .............................. jacktesorero@me.com
CREATIVE DIRECTOR Kevin Bushaw ........................................ kbushaw@me.com Editor Deon Brown ....................................... ionazeditor@me.com PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Tom King ............................................ ionarizona@me.com PRODUCTION & Artwork SUBMISSIONS ionazproduction@me.com Advertising Sales Jack Tesorero ............................................... (602) 750-1164 Danny Catt, Regional Sales Director ............ (520) 429-5905 ionazsales@me.com ADVERTISING CONSULTANT Bill Knoop ..................................................... (602) 301-8457 Photographers:
Fernando Hernandez Jerry O’Conner Don Thompson Deon Brown Cover photo by Don Thompson of Thompson Image National Advertising Representative Rivendell Media (212) 242-6863 ContributORS:
Wes Bergman Addison DeWitt Jackson David Kelly C. Edwards
Robert Hofmann Ted Kirby Kim Ruff Paul Sanchez
Published monthly by
1995-2012: 17 Years of Design and Creative Excellence
© 2012 JMT Designs, Inc.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
PRINTED IN PHOENIX, AZ
All original artwork and photography for ION Arizona Magazine remain property of JMT Designs, Inc, and cannot be reproduced, altered, or sold without authorization and compensation. Limited usage rights can be purchased for a small fee. NOTE: The views expressed in these articles do not necessarily reflect the views of ION Arizona, its staff, or that of its parent company. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization within ION Arizona is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons or organization. To our knowledge, all people photographed and published in ION Arizona are over the age of 18. Some photos were submitted by our readers. To our knowledge, they own the copyrights, and they have given us permission to reproduce them. If you see a picture that you own, please call us immediately and we will remove it from future publications. All copy, text, display, photos, and illustrations in the ads are published with the understanding that the advertisers are fully authorized, have secured proper written consent for the use of names, pictures, and testimonials of any living person, and that ION Arizona is not responsible for unlawful use of such content.
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Phurfest 2012 Grrrr! Get ready! It’s time for Phoenix Phurfest 2012! This year’s theme brings a new league of superheros with “Legion of Bears” and fundraising for Friends of Animal Care & Control. All bears, cubs, otters and hairy bear admirers welcome! It all happens May 10-14. Don’t miss Bearracuda Saturday, May 12 at The Rock, 4129 N. 7th Ave. Visit PhurFest.org for locations, info & more!
Prom Do-Over Okay. So maybe you didn’t get to go to your Prom with that hot guy in your Algebra class you had a crush on. Guess what! Now’s your big chance! Ask that sexy guy from the gym, or that cute girl from the coffee house! It’s a Prom Do-Over at Amsterdam with photos, cash giveaways, prom royalty and a hosted champagne bar! See you there on Saturday, May 12. Discounted pre-sale tix available now. 718 N. Central Ave. 602-258-6122
ICONIC: Night for Life 2012 Get your tuxedo or your evening gown ready and bust up your wig! The social event of the year is here! Simon Doonan, bon vivant, fashionista and stylist for Barney’s New York hosts. It happens Saturday, May 12 at the Montelucia Resort & Spa, 4949 E. Lincoln at Tatum Blvd. in Paradise Valley. For info & tix go to SWHIV.org or call 602-307-5330 x 2241
Jell-O Wrestling in Tucson Watch it wiggle! The Jell-O, that is! It’s the 25th Anniversary Jell-O Wrestling Benefit Auction & Extravaganza in Tucson! Sponsored by Woody’s & IBT’s, this event is benefits Southern Arizona AIDS Foundation. The wrasslin’ happens on Saturday, May 12 at Kennedy Fiesta Park, 3700 S. Cholla. For tix & info visit Jello-Wrestling.org or call 520-628-7223 18
www.IONAZ.com May 2012
Get Lei’d at Dick’s Cabaret Aloha and mahalo! Get in your canoe and paddle over to Dick’s Cabaret for the Get Lei’d Bash! Behold the lovely coconuts on the hottest—and only!—all nude dancers in the state with $2 lap dances, prizes and giveaways! Wait’ll you see King Kum’on’a’wanna-lei-a! The big hunk luau happens on Friday & Saturday, May 18 & 19. 3432 E. Illini, Phoenix. Phone: 602-274-DICK. DicksCabaret.com
MAY 2012 ION EVENTS LISTINGS DATE EVENT
LOCATION CITY
Sun & Wed Wednesdays Fridays Latin Fridays 5 Cinco de Mayo 6 Chili Verde Day 10-14 Phoenix Phurfest 11 Apollo’s 12 25th Jell-O Wrestling 12 Night for Life 12 Neon Blackout 12 Bearracuda 12 Prom Do-Over 13 NEW! Brunch 18 80s Dance & Video Party 18-19 Get Lei’d Bash 20 T Dance & BBQ 22 Mustache Ride 25 Hanky Code Dance Party 26 White Trash Party 27 Carnaval Latino
Strippers - Club 24 Trivia/Bingo Night - Roscoe’s Club 24 Karamba Charlie’s various locations Girlicious Kennedy Fiesta Park Montelucia Resort BS West The Rock Amsterdam Miami Café Apollo’s Dick’s Cabaret The Rock icepics videobar IBT’s BS West Karamba
Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Tucson Scottsdale Scottsdale Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Phoenix Tucson Scottsdale Phoenix
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Come see what we’re all about with ONE MONTH OF FREE SWIMMING! Visit us online for swim locations, swim times and to find out more about the Sunfish.
www.phxsunfish.org
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Queen of the Grass Volleyball Tournament Come play in DVA’s 2nd Queen of the Grass Volleyball Tournament. Everyone knows things are just a little more fun when there’s grass involved. Grab three friends, and get your ass down to Arcadia Park on 56th St. and Indian School Rd. on May 12th, bright and early at 8:00am! Registration is just 10$ a person. Visit desertvolleyball.com for more info.
MAY 2012 ION SPORTS listings DATE EVENT / LOCATION WEBSITE
5/9 & 5/16 Free Indoor Volleyball Open Play at Christown YMCA 5/10 & 5/17 Free Indoor Volleyball Open Play at City Square 5/23 & 6/4 Sand Volleyball Open Play at Steele Park 5/30 Indoor Summer League Volleyball Season Starts 6/11 AZ Gay Volleyball Lague Play Begins Mon/Sat Sunfish (Swimming) Practice at ASU SRC Tues/Thurs Sunfish (Swimming) Practice at Christown YMCA
desertvolleyball.com desertvolleyball.com AZGV.org desertvolleyball.com AZGV.org PHXSunfish.org PHXSunfish.org
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Spring is Pure Bliss Double Down Daily Deals $5 Mondays
$5 patty melts & happy hour all day
$10 Tuesdays
$10 any sandwich, side salad, choice of domestic bottled beer, house wine or soda
20% Off Wednesdays
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Weekend Bliss
Sat & Sun Brunch - $10 mimosa pitchers, $4 bloodys Sunday 2-7pm - 2-4-1 all drinks + $10 bucket of beer Live DJ on the ReBAR patio
Membership_ION_half.pdf
4/25/12
Let your voice be heard.
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M
Y
CM
MY
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CMY
Members vote at the Annual Meeting to decide the Board of Directors, receive monthly email updates and invites to members-only events and membership drives, discounted Insurance through Mutual of Omaha and a complimentary One Voice Community Center T-Shirt.
K
Visit www.1vcc.org for full details today!
One Voice Community Center serves as a cultural focal point, uniting LGBT individuals and organizations, and reinvests in the community by providing vital educational, social, and wellness programs in the Metro Phoenix area.
4442 N. 7th Ave. Phoenix, AZ 85013 602.712.0111 www.1vcc.org | info@1vcc.org Living without fear, shame or isolation.
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4:1
Death Cab for Cutie Indie rock, indie pop, alternative rock, emo ... whatever they are, they’re certainly unorthodox. Name anybody else that uses the organ or the glockenspiel these days. But where else are you gonna hear squirrely beats like they’ve got? Popular with the young kids these days. Catch ‘em on Sunday, May 6 at the Comerica Theatre, 400 W. Washington. For tix call 602-379-2888 or go to LiveNation.com
Drake
African-American/Jewish-Canadian rapper Drake has worked with some of the greats, including Kanye West and Eminem. He even appeared in the Degrassi TV movies. He appears on Thursday, May 10 at Ashley HomeStore Pavilion. Call 800-745-3000 for tix.
Fun. “Tonight we are young! So let’s set the world on fire!” You probably remember the song from Glee, anyway. They sing about everything. Catch these clever little funsters live, in concert at the Mesa Arts Center 1 E. Main St. on Thursday, May 31st. Find out more about the band at OurNameIsFun.com and get show details and tix at MesaArtsCenter.com or call 480-644-6500
MAY 2012 ION Concert Calendar DATE 4 6 9 10 14 14 15 18 18 21 23 26 27 31 31
ARTIST LOCATION Charo Wild Horse Pass Casino Death Cab for Cutie Mesa Arts Center Creed Comerica Theatre Drake Ashley HomeStore Pavilion Snow Patrol Comerica Theatre Kansas Gila River Casino Roger Waters: The Wall Live US Airways Ctr. The Pubes & Whiskey Rodeo The Rock Rammstein Jobing.com Arena Daughtry Comerica Theatre Morrissey Tucson Music Hall Sugarland Ashley Furniture Pavilion Smokey Robinson Talking Stick Resort Jane’s Addiction Tucson Music Hall Fun. Mesa Arts Center
PHONE 800-946-4452 480-644-6500 602-379-2888 800-745-3000 602-379-2888 800-946-4452 800-745-3000 602-248-8559 800-745-3000 602-379-2888 888-546-8561 800-745-3000 800-745-3000 888-546-8561 480-644-6500
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Queer Queens of Qomedy Funny gal Poppy Champlin join forces with The New Gay Sketch Show’s Julie Goldman and piano playing wisecracker Roxanna Ward for some of the quirkiest, edgiest and most outrageous funny business in town! Catch ‘em when they yuk it up at 8 p.m. on Wednesday, May 9 at StandUp Live at CityScape, 50 W. Jefferson. 18+ Check out PoppyChamplin.com and for info visit StandUpLive.com or call 480-719-6100.
La Cage aux Folles Georges and Albin own a glitzy, Gay nightclub in St. Tropez where Albin stars as Zaza. When Georges’ son and his fiancée bring her ultra-conservative parents to visit and that’s when the feathers fly! Starring the Tannest Man Alive, George Hamilton! May 15-20 at ASU Gammage 1400 S. Forest Ave. in Tempe. Visit ASUGammage.com or call 480-965-3434 for tix & info.
Tarzan: the stage musical “Me, Tarzan. You, Jane.” This Lord of the Apes can call us anything he wants! Hunky hometown star Rhys Gilyeat returns from NYC to sing & swing (in a sexy loincloth) to this Disney-based musical thru’ May 20 at Arizona Broadway Theatre, 7701 W. Paradise Ln. in Peoria. Did we mention how hot this Tarzan is? Visit AZBroadwayTheatre.com or call 623-776-8400 for tix.
MAY 2012 ION THEATER + STANDUP DATE EVENT LOCATION 3-20 Red AZ Theatre Co 5 John Fugelsang Orpheum Theatre 9 Queer Queens of Comedy StandUp Live Phx 11-27 Time Stands Still Actors Theatre Co. thru 12 How to Succeed in Business ... Scotts. Desert Stages Theatre 13 Phoenix Comedy Festival Phx Symphony Hall thru 14 Smoke on the Mountain B’way Palm Dinner Theatre 15-20 La Cage aux Folles ASU Gammage 18-6/2 Gruesome Playground Injuries Herberger Theatre 18-19 George Lopez Celebrity Theatre 18-6/9 Heddatron Stray Cat Theatre 19 Bully Mammoth Tempe Ctr. for the Arts thru 20 Tarzan: the stage musical AZ B’way Theatre thru 20 The Altar Boyz Scotts. Desert Stages Theatre 20 Craig Ferguson Wild Horse Pass Casino thru 26 A Closer Walk w/ Patsy Cline B’way Palm Dinner Theatre 26 Jay Leno Talking Stick Resort thru 27 Dream a Little Dream Phoenix Theatre
PHONE 602-256-6995 800-745-3000 480-719-6100 602-253-6701 480-483-1664 602-262-7272 480-325-6700 480-965-3434 602-347-1071 602-267-1600 480-634-6435 480-350-2822 623-776-8400 480-483-1664 877-840-0457 480-325-6700 800-745-3000 602-254-2151
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Dancing with Anthony Luna & Kris Keck
Discovery & Dance by Deon Brown 32 www.IONAZ.com 2012 by Deon Brown photos by Fernando May Hernandez
D
“ ancing is discovery, discovery, discovery,” said dancer Martha Graham. For instructor and local favorite Anthony Luna and his dance pupil and partner Kris Keck, an unconventional partnership that led to a unique discovery of dance for both of them. 30 years ago the nightmare that every high school kid is warned about came true for Kris Keck. An automobile accident on the night of Senior Prom left her with neurological damage affecting her motor skills and landing her in a wheelchair. But a strong will and positive outlook kept Kris going. “I refuse to listen to the word ‘no.’ When it comes to that, I’m not the best at following directions. I think I can do anything!” Kris laughed. “I was looking for something physical to do. Wheelchair racing or basketball didn’t do anything for me, and I’ve always loved dancing!” With an ironclad will and nerves of steel, Kris took off from there.
Anthony Luna talked about their meeting that developed into friendship.
“I was working at Fred Astaire Dance Studios when I met Kris and felt an instant bond. It could see how badly she was being taken advantage of, and that made me decide to go independent as an instructor. Aside from being charged ridiculous amounts of money, she wasn’t being taught to dance— she was just being entertained. Usually the relationship between instructor and student is very professional. With us, it’s anything but. We’re friends, too. We have lunch together about once a week.” “You have to know what your passion is,” Kris said. “I’ve come much farther than I ever thought I’d get. Anthony really listens to me. We really click! We ‘get’ each other.” Anthony discussed the dance industry and his amazing synergy with Kris. “I’ve often struggled with an insecurity that people may think I’m taking her for a ride and milking her for money; to see Kris stand and dance on her own today proved that’s not the case.” The pair’s careful choreography incorporates Kris different abilities by using her wheelchair and creating dance with Anthony. Additionally, after hours of painstaking rehearsal and practice, Kris can dance with Anthony out of the wheelchair as well. “A little over two years ago I was introduced to a woman who’s only dream was to overcome her handicap and become a stand-up dancer,” May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 33
Anthony recounts. “After buckets full of tears, sweat and more bruises than I can count; we have finally attained it! I’ve never been more proud of myself, my student and the ability to dream. There is no greater feeling in the world than helping make a wish come true. I love my career and the impact I am able to have on a life, everyday. Don’t ever let anyone say your hopes are too high and your dreams are impossible. I realized that what we’ve been working towards can and does have a greater impact. You wouldn’t believe how far she’s come! She’s dancing syllabus International Latin Rhumba. It’s not me holding her on her feet; she’s dancing her part!” It’s been a great journey of discovery for Kris and Anthony, both. “Remembering the starting point and realizing
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where we stand now feels so amazing. I’m so happy to have been a part in helping to change this wonderful woman’s life,” Anthony said. Since partnering, Anthony and Kris have been in nearly 30 competitions together. “We’re performing a routine called, ‘You Are My Miracle’ by Vittorio and Nicole Scherzinger and 90% of it’s done with Kris out of the chair. That tells our story,” Anthony said. “You never know what’s gonna happen!” Kris predicts. “If people are gonna look at us, we’re gonna give ‘em something to look at! You have to take limitations and break them!” That’s quite a discovery. Watch Kris Keck and Anthony Luna perform at “People’s Choice DanceSport” Saturday, May 26 at the Westin Kierland, 6902 E. Greenway Parkway in Scottsdale.
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Latrice Royale
from Slammer to Glamour Deon Brown byby Deon Brown photo by Mathu Andersen 36 www.IONAZ.com May 2012
photos courtesy LOGOtv
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he’s large and in charge! Chunky, yet funky! Big, Bold and Beautiful! The one and only Latrice Royale represented the plus-size queens on RuPaul’s Drag Race, season four this year with all the requisite Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent the Drag Superstar of the World looks for every year. The ample Miss Royale brought more to the table than an all-you-can-eat-buffet, just barely being edged out of the top three in Episode 11 and emerging as a fan favorite. A twenty-year veteran in drag, 39-year-old Latrice Royale brought more unexpected “realness” to the set this season. As the “real life” Timothy Wilcots he did hard time spending 18 months in prison. During his incarceration he learned that his mother passed away. His experience made him the perfect choice as the more-than-slightly Lesbianesque “Prison Guard” in the sitcom spoof, Hot in Tuckahoe, where she badgered inmates when she reprimanded, “Get those nuts away from my face!” La Royale’s performance won the her the episode’s challenge award. “As soon as I saw there was a prison guard, I knew that was the role for me,” she laughed. Royale learned from his experience in the Big House. “Everyone makes mistakes, but, bitch, you better look sickening when you get up! Look sickening and make them eat it!” When Royale teamed up with the controversial (some say frontrunner)
Willam for the “Frenemies” challenge, the shared win turned south when Willam was suddenly and surprisingly disqualified. Viewers reeled at RuPaul’s shocking decision. Royale weighed in when: “Girl, the shade of it all!” Audiences gasped, only able to guess what happened. As a long-time veteran of drag, the warm, motherly Royale dealt with the antics of the younger, excitable queens in the competition, never letting them forget, “You’re a dude ... in a wig.” One of memorable highlight of the season happened when Latrice Royale let her spiritual side show after Phi Phi O’Hara begged her to “take them to church.” Royale pulled out her gospel stops when she sang, “Jesus is a biscuit! Let Him sop you up!” The road to Hollywood, California from Wilcot’s home in Hollywood, Florida where she performs at the Palace Bar in South Beach was a long one, and along the way this queen never let audiences forget, “I am Latrice Motherfuckin’ Royale!” Catch Latrice Royale with Lady Christian’s Trailer Trash Revue on Friday, May 25 at 10 p.m. and again on Sunday, May 27 at 7 p.m. at The Rock, 4129 N. 7th Ave. Ph: 602-2488559. $20 VIP tix available in advance includes a Meet ‘n’ Greet. Make reservations at TheRockDMPhoenix.com May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 37
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Memorial Day at Charlie’s Our fearless boys and girls who’ve fought so bravely for their country are remembered on this very special weekend with a drag show at Pussy LeHoot’s raucous 12th Annual Memorial Day Show starring Claudia B, Miss Ebony and Barbra Seville at 4 p.m. on Monday, May 28. And did we mention a complimentary buffet? You won’t want to miss this! Charlie’s, 727 W. Camelback Rd. Phone: 602-265-0224
MAY 2012 ION DRAG LISTINGS DATE
TIME LOCATION SHOW / PERFORMER(S)
Sun 5/6 8:00pm Fri 5/11 10:00pm Sun 5/13 10:30pm Sun 5/13 8:00pm Wed 5/16 10:30pm Thurs 5/17 10:30pm Sun 5/20 8:00pm Fri 5/25 10:00pm Sun 5/27 8:00pm Sun 5/27 Sun 5/27 7:00pm
Apollo’s The Rock Karamba Apollo’s Karamba Karamba Apollo’s The Rock Apollo’s Karamba The Rock
ArizonaDrag.com presents Showgirlz Juke Joint w/ Pandora DeStrange, Lady Christian, & Tatum Michelle Diamond’s 80’s Birthday Party Tequila Nights with Tyra Marie & Grecia Montes D’Occa Stars of AZ USA Show Ruby’s Second Anniversary Show Cougar Cabaret Latrice Royale Coco St. James & Nevaeh McKenzie Suprise RuPaul Drag Race Contestant Performance! Latrice Royale
Mondays 10:00pm Tuesdays 8 & 10pm Tuesdays 8:00pm Tuesdays 10:30pm Wednesdays 9:00pm Wednesdays 10:30pm Wednesdays 9:00pm Wednesdays 10:00pm Thursdays 10:30pm Fridays 9:00pm Fridays 10:00pm Fridays 10:30pm Fridays 9:00pm Saturdays 9:00pm Saturdays 10:30p Saturdays 10:00pm Saturdays 10:00pm Saturdays 9:30pm 1st & 3rd Sun. 12:30pm Sundays 8:30pm Sundays 8:30pm Sundays 10:30pm 2nd Sunday
Apollo’s Amsterdam BS West Karamba IBT’s Karamba The Rock Charlie’s Karamba IBT’s The Rock Cruisin’ 7th BS West IBT’s Cruisin’ 7th The Rock icepics Charlie’s Cruisin’ 7th icepics Charlie’s Karamba Woody’s
Naughty or Nice Bingo Dinner’s a Drag with Kiki Vermont, Kira Daniels & Sasha Bratz Kendra’s Big Top Salsa Tuesdays with Savannah Moussier Viva La Diva with Janee Star Barbra Seville Open Wide Wednesdays Claudia B. & Company Tejano Thursdays with Ruby Reynolds Absolutely Flawless with China Collins An Evening with The Outlaws Miss Dottie Pepper Elements 7 Deadly Sins - followed by Mandi BoomBoom Starrletts with Janee Star Mia Inez Adam’s Saturday Night Madness The Barbra Seville Show The Olivia Gardens Show / A Touch of Soul with Maraya Jordan Pussy’s Patio Show Sunday Morning Madness with Miss Dottie Pepper FAGtv with Dianna K. Shane Pussy LeHoot & Friends Diamond’s Show Happy Hour with Susan Artemis May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 39
PET PRIDE
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APOLLO’S LOUNGE
PHOTOS at www.IONAZ.com
by Jackson David Kelly jacksonkelly@cox.net
Yo, DJ! What’s New?
I
n addition to these, check out new stuff from Silversun Pickups, Garbage, Santigold, Chris Brown, Santana, Paul McCartney, Marilyn Manson, Smash and Carrie Underwood.
Kimbra
Vows Internationally available Vows finally sees a stateside release due to the success of singer/ songwriter Gotye. Part Amy Winehouse, Nina Simone and Imogen Heap, Kimbra’s layered vocals and phrasing are pure brilliance. Though originally jazztrained, Kimbra reflects a vast array of styles that is as good as Adele; one step beyond. For the U.S. release, find hits from her debut as well as newly crafted songs like the jazzy, funk-pop “Come into my Head.” One of the best tracks proves to be the quirky “Settle Down,” while “Cameo Lover” just glimmers bubblegum pop. Also look to “Good Intent” and “Plain Gold Ring” for sleek innovation. GRADE: A-
Keane
Strangeland Each of Keane’s albums have been career changers and though many were lost with the electro Symmetry, find solace in this release which lands stylistically between Fears and Iron Sea. Gone are the forced likable songs of past and present are tracks that sweep and lift the listener to a new level all while being melodic and catchy. “You Are Young” and “Silenced” and their ohso-great sing-along bridges shine bright while the mid-tempo builder “Black Rain” gives the listener an off balanced look into musical greatness. Then there’s “Sovereign Light Café,” this album’s best track and dare I say it, their best ever! GRADE: A-
Norah Jones
Little Broken Hearts It’s been ten years since Norah’s debut and in commemoration she changes it up and gets help from Danger Mouse, aka Brian Burton. Take parts of Goldfrapp, a soundtrack that could have supported Kill Bill and add some Sheryl Crow blues/folk and you get the brilliance of this trippy progression. It’s hip, current and bold. Album lead-in “Good Morning” starts this new journey while the haunting, island infused “After the Fall” proves she isn’t the same tepid artist. Other tracks of note include the mid-tempo “Say Goodbye” and the melancholy yet pleasing “Miriam.” GRADE: B+
Rufus Wainwright
Out of the Game Elton John calls Rufus, “The greatest songwriter on the planet” and on this album he takes a 180-degree turn to create an all happy, poptingling album as commercial as anyone could tolerate. Produced by Mark Ronson, who calls this his best work to date; Out channels the likes of Bowie, Elton and Queen. From the opener and title track, the listener gets a perfect glimpse as to the perky and toe-tapping 70s throwback feel of the album. Standout singles prove to be the electro-sleek “Barbara,” the fantasy-like “Montak” and this set’s somber yet uplifting, “Sometimes You Need.” GRADE: B
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UNITY
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MADISON EVENTS CENTER
PHOTOS AT DIRTYBOYPRODUCTIONS.COM
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by Kimberly M. Ruff kimberlymruff@yahoo.com
Heroes, Has-Beens & Hotties Marvel’s The Avengers Starring: Robert Downey, Jr., Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, Samuel L. Jackson, Don Cheadle Finally the moment we’ve all been waiting for: Marvel’s The Avengers. After years of learning the back stories of The Incredible Hulk, Iron Man, Thor, and Captain America, we get to see them all together on one screen alongside fellow superheroes, Hawkeye and Black Widow. You see, some disasters are too great for only one superhero to handle, so when a threat to global security and safety arises, Nick Fury, the director of S.H.I.E.L.D.—the Marvel universe’s equivalent of the United Nations—assembles a team of superheroes to save the day. Will they? Probably. Was that ever really in doubt? Not really. Still, it’ll be one hell of a ride. Release Date: May 4.
The Perfect Family
Starring: Kathleen Turner, Emily Deschanel, Jason Ritter, Richard Chamberlain, Elizabeth Pena You never know what goes on behind closed doors; nowhere is this truer than in the irreverent comedy about keeping up appearances, The Perfect Family. Starring Kathleen Turner (The War of the Roses) as Eileen, the devout Catholic Matriarch of the Cleary Clan, The Perfect Family is how
her bid to win the coveted title of Catholic Woman of the Year not only blows those doors—but cupboards and closets—wide open. Will the board approve of her Lesbian daughter, Shannon (Deschanel), her philandering son, Frank Jr. (Ritter), or Eileen’s own marriage to a recovering alcoholic? Release Date: May 4.
Magic Mike
Starring: Channing Tatum, Alex Pettyfer, Matthew McConaughey Based on his own life experiences, Magic Mike stars Channing Tatum as, well, Mike Martingano, a male stripper who works at a nightclub called Xquisite, owned by former stripper, Dallas (McConaughey). Though Mike yearns for a life outside of the glitzy world of male strippers, he still takes it upon himself to teach a new stripper, The Kid (Pettyfer), the ropes. Oddly, the film is directed by Steven Soderbergh. Look, I’m going to level with you guys: the only good thing about this film is that it features good looking men stripping. This is, after all, the male equivalent of Coyote Ugly—except Channing Tatum’s character wants to be an actor instead of a musician. I’m not entirely surprised to see McConaughey signed on; that guy would find any excuse he could to get naked. It’s, like, his thing. Nonetheless, it’s eye candy, so there’s a silver lining in that other dull cloud. Release Date: June 29, 2012. May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 45
by Wes Bergman wesobergman@yahoo.com
This is What Love in Action Looks Like (2012) In June 2005, Zach Stark, a 16-year-old Tennessee homosexual posted an entry on his Myspace blog notifying his friends that his decision to come out to his parents prompted them to enroll him in the youth-centric ex-gay program, Refuge. An off-shoot of Love in Action, the world’s largest ex-gay Christian ministry, Refuge extended their mission to counsel—and ostensibly cure—participants of homosexuality. Though many took umbrage with Love in Action’s erroneous assumption that homosexuality is akin to an addiction, public frustration reached a fever pitch when Refuge was open and began “treating” minors without their consent. Zach Stark’s confessional blog post spread like wildfire and soon volunteers nationwide—including documentarian, Morgan Jon Fox—showed up at Love in Action’s headquarters to protest. All this is catalogued in Fox’s insightful documentary, This is What Love in Action Looks Like. A recent episode of 46
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This American Life, a radio show broadcast on NPR, entitled “Own Worst Enemy” (Episode #462; aired 4/13/2012) discussed the tentative friendship formed between Fox and Love in Action’s thenDirector, John Smid, and how— through an act that is undeniably Christian—Fox was able to encourage Smid, an ex-gay man himself, to evaluate his own life choices. DVD available through TLA Releasing on May 8. “Your Own Worst Enemy” by This American Life is currently available for free on their website ThisAmericanLife. org under radio archives.
Diana Ross: Live in Central Park (2012)
On July 21, 1983, former frontwoman of Mo-Town darlings, The Supremes, successful solo artist and world-renowned diva, Diana Ross, took the stage at New York’s Central Park to perform for over 800,000 adoring fans. Despite high winds and eventually pouring rain, Ross soldiered on until it became too dangerous, promising she’d return to do it all again the next day. Sure enough, she returned the following day, solidifying her spot as one of the most dedicated musical artists of her time. Though Miss Ross
IT’S SPRING BABY! has since retired and been eclipsed by younger artists, you cannot deny the indelible imprint she left on the musical world, both as a talented artist and a larger-than-life persona. If you’re one of Lady Gaga’s faithful little Monsters or mad for Madge, this concert of “The Boss” is a must-see. Available from Shout! Factory, May 15.
Dine in or ‘al FEZ-co’ on our fresh air patio. Amazing daily drink and weekend brunch specials.
Madonna: Truth or Dare (Blu-Ray)
Speaking of being mad for Madge, Madonna (or MDNA, if you’re now referring to her as the Artist Who Formerly Used More Vowels), is nothing if not an incredible saleswoman. The Queen of Pop released her scandalicious pheromone-soaked documentary, Truth or Dare. Again. Shot during her 1990 Blond Ambition Tour, this up-close and personal doc features commentary by Herself and her close friends who feel compelled to “express” themselves. Now available on BluRay through Lionsgate Entertainment, Madonna: Truth or Dare is an absolute “must” for dedicated material boys and girls.
Lunch. Dinner. Late Night. Weekend Brunch. fezoncentral.com • 3815 N. Central Avenue fezoncentral
@fezoncentral
A Central Phoenix Original
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 47
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Local LGBT Ally on Undercover Boss S
cott Koehler, owner of local franchise of FASTSIGNS® for 10 ½ years, will be featured in an episode of CBS’s hit series Undercover Boss on Friday, May 4, from 7:00-8:00 p.m. FASTSIGNS® store located at 2517 N. Central Avenue in Phoenix. Each week, the two-time Emmy Awardnominated show follows a different executive on an undercover mission to examine the inner workings of their companies. Catherine Monson, CEO of FASTSIGNS® made a trip to the Valley. “It was exhilarating to work with Scott,” she said. She also saw Scott was as a business owner dealing with business and life challenges. His wife has multiple sclerosis and due to chemotherapy treatments is unable to conceive. They were turned down by the first adoption agency they went to. Eventually, they adopted a newborn baby girl. Scott was diagnosed with bladder cancer and had two surgeries. His cancer returned and he had his bladder removed. In 2008 business was
down 35-40% with light rail construction followed by the recession. He had to downsize, with no vacations and he put in extra hours. He persevered with a positive attitude. “I know too many people in life that don’t have the challenges he has and they complain. Scott is positive and full of gratitude,” states Monson. “His outlook on life motivated me to create an award in his honor that will be given out at our annual corporate event.” “I am a positive person. I see no point in being negative. Negative people tend to get negative results. Positive people at least have an opportunity for a positive result,” said Koehler. “I am blessed to be alive and I have a wonderful family. I enjoy my business and being a part of this show and the rewards I have received from Catherine and FASTSIGNS® International are incredible!” As a Straight Ally, Scott is an active member of the Greater Phoenix Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce. He has worked closely with ION Arizona magazine. His support, enthusiasm and generosity to the GLBT community are beyond compare.
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Finding that really great Mexican restaurant
can keep fry your brain and tastebuds, both. Ask the most hard-boiled authority of cuisine from south of the border who has the best comidas Mexicano and they’ll say, “Beats me.” But keep your sunny side up! The Devil is in the details, so get crackin’! We scrambled down to Dos Juevos Cantina in Scottsdale to and said, “¿Que pasa?” to find out eggxactly what’s cookin’ with owners— and partners—Shelley (That’s not a pun. I’m not kidding) Curtis and Ruth Leatherman—a couple of good eggs who know food. And it’s no “yolk,”— they’ve got some innovative and creatively prepared and Mexican dishes that will surprise you, amigos. Shelley and Ruth own and operate Bagels ‘N Bialys in Scottsdale and were excited to open the defunct Julio G’s with an authentic menu of traditional Mexican dishes focusing on slow-cooked meats including green chili, carnitas and achiote chicken.
Dos Juevos variety of ten entrées, they feature a favorite standby, the Chile Relleno; you’ll get two very sizable deep fried chilies stuffed with cheese and your choice of chicken or pork and topped with ancho cream sauce and cilantro crema. All entrées are served with a choice of two generous sides: Anaheim Pepper stuffed with sweet potato (and this is a “must”) roasted corn pudding, tamale with green chili rice, southwest frieds, creamy green chili rice, Spanish rice or refried or black beans. All this for $9.50 Six Dos Juevos “Favorites” are featured on the menu, too. The enormous burritos come filled with tender Machaca, carnitas, green chili beef or Achiote chicken and are served enchilada style with shredded cheddar-jack cheese for $9.50. Craving it chimistyle or with fundito (a creamy cheese sauce)? Add a couple bucks more. The Green Chile Beef is cooked
“We cook what we like to eat,” said Ruth. “It’s food we enjoy!” Their genuine love of food and cooking is something you’ll love, too. The combination of spices and preparation you’ll note here have a duskier and smokier tone than the Mexican food you’re probably used to, since Dos Juevos uses some recipes from the state of Durango, Mexico. Chef Bobby Olsen Among the tempting May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 51
for hours with the Dos Juevos-made green chile sauce, served piping hot in a cast iron skillet and served with warm, fresh flour tortillas for only $8.50. Everything you know and love, including cheese enchiladas, tacos, and even a chipotle black bean burger with all the toppings is available, too, along with the choice of two sides listed above. Beyond traditional fare you expect, you’ll find Latininspired surprises, like Coffee Rubbed Pork Tenderloin with a blueberry-chipotle glaze that’s been calling me back to try, and a Blue Corn crusted Chicken Breast. Nothing on the menu is over $12.50, so your wallet will stay just as full as your belly. You can’t say that often these days. !Ay, caramba! They’ve also got six amazing lunch specials for $6 served weekdays from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. as well as a Happy hour with
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taco, beer and tequila specials. And if you’re a tequila enthusiast, note they’ve got Dos Juevos’ “huevos” make an appearance every day at 7 a.m. on the breakfast menu, served ‘till 11 a.m. MondayFriday and ‘til 2 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday. Choose from omelets, Belgian waffles, challah French toast and several other Mexicaninspired treats, like the Durango Burrito. So if you put all of your huevos in one basket, or count your pollos before the hatch, you’ll want to make sure you do it at Dos Juevos. That’s something to crow about! 7633 E. Indian School Rd. Scottsdale, AZ 85251 Ph: 480-947-2000 DosJuevos.com Open 7 a.m.-2 a.m.
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 53
Keep an eye out for our summer specials! www.thompsonimage.com 480.905.0046
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We Call it Home! Welcome to Arizona —the Funshine State! Take your time and enjoy our enticing year-‘round climate, our celebrated southwestern hospitality, famous desert landscapes— and don’t forget to take in the sights! Stay cool in the pool! Relax! It’s summer in Arizona!
Photography by
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 55
miamie cafe
sundays coming may 13th
Brunch
funday
10 am
noon
-
2 pm
-
9 pm
h c n ru
b y a d n u s the
ew all n menu nch bru d more an
we
!
et r y
ve t o ’ n s i nd check-in eke
specials
602>258>6122 amsterdam,rare@gmai.com 718 north Central avenue
Sun Kissed Beauty Our famous summers offer you long days and warm nights! Share the allure of Arizona attractions with someone you love in these outfits from Tan United.
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 57
SPLASH BASH
More
PHOENIX PLACE HOTEL
PHOTOS at www.IONAZ.com
Plan on a Tan You don’t have to shovel the sunshine here! And the bathing suits should reflect this. AussieBum styles available at Tan United.
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 59
Take a picture! It lasts longer! You’ll want to share Arizona’s attractions with the folks back home! Our dates are great! Ray Bans and watch from Tan United. Giovanny Swim Briefs from Boom Boom LaRue’s
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 61
PSC POOL EXTRAVAGANZA
Ph enix Social C ub
photos by
MONTELUCIA
Do it all!
There’s so much to experience in Arizona! Once you come, you’ll come again and again! So stay for breakfast!
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 63
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Scenic Views
The beauty and wonder of Arizona’s horizons and vistas are something you won’t want to miss! TeamUSA Swim Briefs and Shorts, Ray Ban Sunglasses, and Addicted Briefs available at Tan United.
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 65
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Vol. 5, Issue 12
MAY 2012
OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS! Unfair and unbalanced. We decide.
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
New Label: “Smoking is Glamorous Again!”
OUTRAGEOUS!
WASHINGTON, D.C.— U.S. District Judge Richard Leon ruled that forcing tobacco companies to put large, graphic labels with images of cancerriddled lungs, rotting teeth and other gruesome images on cigarette packs is unconstitutional. Leon cited that it is a violation of freespeech rights under the Constitution.
is bad,’ blah, blah, blah,” said on anonymous administrator at Philip Morris, makers of the popular Marlboro and other popular brands. “We want America to see smoking for what it really is: glamorous, sophisticated and it also gives you an air of worldliness that will attract people to you. Even if they don’t invite you to parties because you stink or want to kiss you.”
OUTRAGEOUS!
“This is certainly a boon to the cigarette business,” wheezed one marketing executive for tobacco giant, R.J. Reynolds. Cigarette manufacturers propose putting “We here to show the American public pictures of famous movie stars who made and all those great people overseas that smoking stylish and chic in Hollywood’s ANY RESEMBLANCE IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL smoking isn’t all bad. We’veTO got THE picturesTRUTH heyday on all cigarette packs instead to prove it.” of warnings. Crawford. Bogart. Davis. Hepburn. Dean. The U.S. Food & Drug Administration required tobacco giants to implement strict “All the greats,” said one exec. “Sure, warnings about the dangers of smoking in they’re all dead now. Some from cancer. But 2009. they sure knew how to smoke!”
OUTRAGEOUS! “Yes, forget all that poppycock the government health officials spout off about ‘smoking can kill you’ or ‘smoking
“My administration is appealing this decision,” said President Barack Obama, as he fired up a Marlboro Red.
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 69
OUTRAGEOUS! Valley Youth Sets Bucket List Goals
OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS! ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
SCOTTSDALE — Tempus Fugits. Yes, the “Time Flies” for Zachary Blumenthal, 7-years-old, attending Greyhawk Elementary sees time slipping away all too quickly through his little, dimpled, pink fingers. Little Zachary is setting goals for himself. He has a “Bucket List.”
wistfully. “That’s why a Bucket List is so important to me,” Zachary explained. “I’d like to be tall enough to ride The Zipper at Castles ‘n’ Coasters. I want to be a Hall Monitor, know what it’s like to win a Spelling Bee. I haven’t even been to a birthday pizza party at Chuck E Cheese yet,” he said. “Thats why I needed a Bucket List.”
OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS! “I’m not getting any younger,” Zachary
“Kids being forced to grow up faster and told RESEMBLANCE usRESEMBLANCE by the monkey bars TO during second ANY THE TRUTH ISare TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL ANY TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL recess. “Those madcap, carefree days I spent at Montessori are far behind me. I’m not the shallow, awkward, hollow little pre-K kid I was then, when long division and getting grounded for a week seemed a lifetime away.” That’s why Zachary created a Bucket List.
faster,” said one school administrator. “It’s not enough to have a Tickle-Me-Elmo. Now they want an iPad2. And, of course, a private island.” “I’m no longer the fake, uninspired child they talked about in the cafeteria last year,” Zach concluded. “I’m looking forward to living in Paris, trying Adderall and having numerous sexual experiences before I’m in the 6th Grade.”
OUTRAGEOUS! “There’s so much I want to be able to do before I hit middle school,” he said
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL
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74 74 www.IONAZ.com www.IONAZ.com May May 2012 2012
IONARIZONA 1.
Amsterdam
718 N. Central Ave. - Downtown PHX (602) 258-6122
2.
2303 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 956-2885
3.
Anvil Apollo’s
5749 N. 7th St. - Phoenix
(602) 277-9373
4.
Bar 1
3702 N. 16th St. - Phoenix
(602) 266-9001
5.
Bliss / Rebar
901 N. 4th St. - Phoenix
(602) 795-1792
6.
BS West
7125 E. 5th Ave. - Scottsdale
(480) 945-9028
7.
Bunkhouse
4428 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix
(602) 200-9154
8.
Cash Inn
2140 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 244-9943
9.
Charlie’s
727 W. Camelback Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 265-0224
10. Club 24
2424 E. Thomas Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 334-1462
11. Club Zarape
1730 E. McDowell Rd - Phoenix
12. Cruisin’ 7th 13. Dick’s Cabaret
3702 N. 7th St. - Phoenix
(602) 212-9888
3432 E. Illini Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 274-DICK
14. FLEX Men’s Club
1517 S Black Canyon Hwy - Phoenix
(602) 271-9011
15. Friends
1028 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix (602) 277-7729
16. icepics videobar
3108 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 267-8707
17. Karamba
1724 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 254-0231
18. Kobalt
3110 N. Central Ave. - Phoenix
(602) 264-5307
19. NuTowne Saloon
5002 East Van Buren St. - Phoenix
(602) 267-9959
20. OZ
1804 W. Bethany Home Rd. - Phoenix (602) 242-5114
21. Plazma
1560 E. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 266-0477
22. Rainbow Cactus
15615 N. Cave Creek Rd. - Phoenix
(602) 971-1086
23. The Rock 24. Roscoe’s
4129 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix
(602) 248-8559
4531 N. 7th St. - Phoenix
(602) 285-0833
25. ZOAN (formerly Z Girl)
4301 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix
(602) 265-3233
26. IBT’S See map on pg 76
616 N. 4th Ave. - Tucson
(520) 882-3053
27. Woody’s See map on pg 76 3710 N. Oracle Rd. - Tucson
Recommended
(520) 292-3702
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com www.IONAZ.com 75 75
GOSPEL BRUNCH
SHERATON HOTEL DOWNTOWN PHOENIX
76
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WOODY’S
IBT’S*FRIDAY 05.25.12 @9PM $3 COVER
IBT’S PRESENTS
HANKY*CODE Y T R A P E C N A D se R u o E H E y t o U A Q isco + Sleazy Bo BOYS Dirty D
Y’D GOGO K N A H & T OOR * HO SPECIAL * 2 DJ’S D E H T T KY A RINK & MORE! * O I FREE HAN SHOW@9PM * D T A P HE DRAG RTY ON T A ODE P C R * O Y E K D I N S A DANCE IN YOUR H W O N K BETTER (520) 882.3053 616 N. 4th Ave Tucson, AZ WWW.TWITTER.COM/IBTs WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/IBTSTUCSON May 2012
www.IONAZ.com 77
IONBAR GUIDE PHOENIX
FRIDAY
SATURDAY
SUNDAY
Alpha Boys
Dollar Dances Specials all night
Dollar Dances Specials all night
2-4-1 VIP Dances
Amsterdam|Miami
Happy Hour $3 Smirnoff/$2 Beer Food served until 2apm
Kiki Vermont $3 Smirnoff Food served until 2apm
Karaoke 1/2 OFF for Arts & Industry
Apollo’s
2-4-1 well & domestic 4pm-10pm
$5 red cup/50¢ refills 10a-10p Karaoke 9pm
$5 red cup/50¢ refills 10a-10p Male Strippers 10:30pm
Bar 1
10a-4p $2 well/ Bud Lt draft HH 4-7 $2.50 well, bottle & draft
10a-4p $2 well/ Bud Lt draft $2 dom bottle 6-9p
Shirtless Sundays! $1.25 Bud Light draft w/ shirt off
Happier Hour 3-6:30p 2-4-1well $5 martinis-$3 all beer & h wine
Brunch 10am-2pm $4 Bloody $3 glass or $10 mimosas pitch
Sunday Chill 2-7pm 2-4-1 alcohol / $10 bucket beer
BS West
Elements Show 10pm $3 u-call it beer & $5 cocktails
2-4-1 All Day and All Night Go-go boys, extended patios
Karaoke with Brock @ 9:30p Drink Specials
Charlie’s
$3 pitchers/2-4-1 well/dom 2-7p $1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours
$3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 12-7p $1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours
Volleyball 4-7pm, NEW 3-4-1 $3 Long Islands, $3 pitchers
Club 24
2-4-1 Well 3-10pm Open 3pm-2am
2-4-1 Well 3-10pm Open 3pm-2am
2-4-1 Well 3-10pm MALE STRiPPERS! 8:30pm
Cruisn’ 7th
Dotty Fridays 10:30 pm 2-4-1 Well 6-9pm
Stripper Saturdays 4:30 pm Fabulous Mia Saturdays 10:30
Morning Madness 1st & 3rd Sun $3 Svedka cocktails 7p-close
Dick’s Cabaret
2-4-1 VIP Dances 7pm ‘til 9pm
Off the Hook Tons of Prizes & Giveaways
2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances & VIP Wristbands
$3 Pomegranate Presses Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p
$3 Bottle Beer & Tequila Shot Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p
$3 Brunch Drinks 50% off bottles of wine
R Bliss / ReBAR
R FEZ Friends
Sunday Brunch 10am-2pm $12.50 Mimosa & Bloody Mary Specials
H.H. FREE Appetizers 5-7pm Freeky Friday w/Celia Putty
icepics
MEAT - Hot Go Go Dancers $2.50 dom / $3 well / $4 Lg Isl.
Drag Show $4 SKYY cocktails 10pm
Show Tunes Sundays 2pm-8pm 2-4-1 drinks
Karamba
Vaquero Fridays 9pm-11pm Reverse Happy Hour $2 drinks
Top 40 Saturdays 9pm-11pm Reverse Happy Hour $2 drinks
Top 40 Sundays Diamond Show $3 Pitcher Beer Bust
R Maizie’s
Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday
Happy Hour Brunch 9a-2p 3-6pm Everyday
Brunch All Day Closes at 4pm
R Mi Patio
Fridays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Saturdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Sundays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
OZ Bar
Karaoke w/Miss Gina 9pm-1am 2-4-1 Every Day 6am-2pm
2-4-1 Every Day 6am-2pm Texas Hold’em 8 &10pm
L.A.D.S Bingo 1pm & 3pm $1 draft Bud, BL, Amberbock all day
The Rock
$3 Well/Dom All Day/Everyday! $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
$3 Well/Dom All Day/Everyday! $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
$3 Well/Dom All Day/Everyday! $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
R Roscoe’s*
Fiesta Friday $3 Cervezas Roscoe’s Dancers @ 10:30pm
Happy Hour 10am-7pm Free Darts All afternoon
Make your Bloody Mary Bar $8 Lg Isnd Pitch. $3 Beer Pitch.
R Switch
Fri: $3 House Margaritas Open from 11am-Midnight
Sat: $3 House Cosmo Martini Open from 10am-Midnight
$3 Sweet Tea Vodka Lemonade $3 Breakfast Open @ 10
R Ticoz
Fridays 1/2 off Coronas all day Happy Hour 3-6:30pm
Saturday 1/2 off well vodka Brunch 10a-3p - HH 3-6:30p
Sundays 1/2 off Sangria Pitch Brunch 10a-3p - HH 3-6:30
Happy Hour 5-9pm DJ Spin 9pm-Close
Happy Hour 1 5-9pm DJ Spin 9pm-Close
Happy Hour 5-9pm $5 Heel Lifter w/ John Breem 9p-cl
IBT’s
Flawless Fridays China Colins Karaoke 5-8pm
Saturday Starlets w/Janee Starr
Cheap Ass Sundays Karaoke 4-close
Woody’s
Happy Hour w/ Susan Artemis Second Sunday Special Brunch
Happy Hour 11am-8pm
Happy Hour 11am-8pm Karaoke 4pm-2am
Zoan
TUCSON
R 78
FULL MENU
* LIMITED MENU/TIMES
www.IONAZ.com May 2012
FREE PROJECT HARD HAT CONDOMS
MONDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY
THURSDAY
Closed Mondays
Closed Tuesday
Amateur Show 9pm
2-4-1 VIP Dances
Martini Mondays $5 Martinis & $5 Pizza
Margherita Pizza & 2 Margaritas only $15
Dinner for 2 Salad, Pizza and Btl Wine $15
Show Night: Kik Vermont $3 Smirnoff & $3 All Beers
Drag Bingo 10pm 2 for 1 u-call-it all day
Tini Tuesdays $2 off any martini
Happy Hour All Day $2.75 Well & Domestic
Karaoke 9:30pm
Monday Beer Bust $1 Bud Light draft 4p-close
KAROKE @9pm $2.50 well, dom bottle & drafts
Student Salvation Mondays $20 Plate of apps + bottle wine
Twofer Tuesdays $20 2 burgers/fries/2 dom beer
$1 OFF in your undies/leather 10a-4p $2 well/ Bud Lt draft
2-4-1 U Call It 4pm- close
2-4-1 Wednesdays 9pm-close 2-4-1 on ALL drinks
Thirstday Thursdays $4 AMF, Lng Islnd/ Skinny drink
I Love My Wii - Games all night Stars of Tomorrow 8:30p $2 domestic beer / $3 well $1 Off Beer / $2 Off Call
2-4-1 All Day and All Night Go-go boys, extended patios
Amateur Strip Night w/ Mandi $3 u-call it beer & $5 cocktails
Underwear Party 8-cl 2-4-1 2-8pm $3 pitch. 2-4-1 well/dom
2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 8p-close $3 Smirnoff
2-4-1 All Day! Cocktails and beer
2-4-1 Well 3-10pm Open 3pm-2am
2-4-1 Well 3-10pm Open 3pm-2am
2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 8p-Close 2-4-1 cocktails/dom
2-4-1 Well 6-9pm
2-4-1 Well 6-9pm Karaoke 9pm
Steppin’ Out TC Taylor hosts 10:30 pm - $2 domestic
Strippers 10:30 pm 2-4-1 Well 6-9pm
2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances, VIP Wristbands
Amateur Night Starts at 10pm
WTF Wednesdays $5 Cover and almost everything else
Stripper Karaoke
$3 Burgers $ Margaritas Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p
‘tini Tuesdays $3 Martinis Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p
$20 Any Bottle of Wine Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p
$3 G Spots Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p
Monday Night Karaoke 9p-1a 2-4-1 8am-2pm (M-F)
NEW: Meatgrinder 9p Dating Game w/ Celia Putty
NEW: AMIGOS Go-go boys/DJ $5 Latin Inspired Drink
2-4-1 Thursday Well & Domestic ALL DAY
FREE Poker Tournament 7pm and 10pm
GLEE starting at 7pm 2-4-1 drinks during the show
Karaoke starting at 9pm $3 well/$2.50 dom./$4 martinis
2-4-1 in undies beer/well 9p-cl $3 Three Olives Thursdays
Karaoke Mondays DJ Ramon $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust
Salsa Tuesday Savannah Show $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust
Top 40 Wed. Barbra Seville $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust
TEJANO Ruby Show $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust
$4 Bistro Burgers 4-10pm $10 off of all Bottled Wines
Pizza/Wine Special Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday
BBQ Short Ribs Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday
$3 Mexican Beers Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday
Mondays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Tuesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Wednesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
Thursdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks
2-4-1 ALL DRINKS, ALL DAY! In-House Dart League Tour. 8p
Dart League 7pm In-House Cash Pool Tour. 9pm
2-4-1 Every Day 6am-2pm Texas Hold’em 8 &10pm
2-4-1 Every Day 6am-2pm Texas Hold’em 8 &10pm
$3 Well/Dom All Day/Everyday! $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
$3 Well/Dom All Day/Everyday! $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
$3 Well/Dom All Day/Everyday! $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
Happy Hour ‘til 8pm- Open 2-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!
Monday Pool Tournament 2-4-1 beer & well 7pm-close
2 for Tuesdays 2-4-1 drinks all day
Wednesday TRIVIA @ 9pm All Day Happy Hour
Gold Fish Races @ 9pm 2-4-1 7pm
Mon: $3 House Chard and Cab Open from 11am-Midnight
Tue: $3 Drunken Italian Sodas Open from 11am-Midnight
Wed: $3 Sangrias Open from 11am-Midnight
Thur: $3 Caipirinhas Open from 11am-Midnight
Mondays 1/2 off Mojitos HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid
Tuesdays 1/2 off Sangrias HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid
Wednesdays 1/2 off Margaritas HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid
Thursdays 1/2 off draft beer HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid
Happy Hour 5-9pm S.I.N. 2-4-1 for service indstry
Happy Hour 5-9pm 2-4-1 9pm-Close
Happy Hour 5-9pm Karaoke @ 9pm
Happy Hour 5-9pm Beer Bust $2.75 Pitchers
Reverse Happy Hour
Taco Tuesdays Only $1 Beer & tequila specials
Viva La Diva! w/ Janee Starr Whiskey Breath Night
Therapy Thursdays 2-4-1 Karaoke 5-8om
Happy Hour 11am-8pm
2-4-1 Tuesdays
Margarita Day & Night $4.50 Margaritas
Craft Beer Night AZ Breweries $3 & FREE pool all day/night
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by Addison DeWitt
P eople have accused me of being a cold, cruel,
mean-spirited, heartless bastard. Okay. Even if it is true, I want my readers to see the softer side of me. Kind of like Sears. If nothing else I’m also quite soulful and very, very spiritual. As a kid growing up at the WonderVu Trailer Court I dreamed of growing up and becoming a priest. Then I decided, “To hell to that! Why not just gonna be Gay?” So, although I’m not a “man of the cloth,” I have been known to get on my knees from time to time. Even if it’s to peek through a keyhole to spy for a nugget of news.
Fabulous Hollywood-by-way-of-Phoenix film producer and patron of the arts, the ageless Mich Lyon (pictured top), the well-known “Valley Youth Project” impresario was seen at the Phoenix Film Festival at the screening of Positive Youth, featuring Austin Head who arrived with a kadre of kookie klub kidz in tow wearing the Max Factor makeup department. No kidding. The. Entire. Department. A few nights later that forever-young whippersnapper Mich Lyon was plying that handsome (with lots of eyeliner. Lots and lots of it) Alekzander Shaw, with a New York
Stripper Steak and around two, three or let’s just say fifty-six vodka martoonies at Durant’s. I wouldn’t mind finding Aleks on my relish tray, either, Mich! Another fabulous Phoenix Pride has come and gone. Word is that The Village People Person Felipé Rose (pictured center left)—who apparently really is the Last of the Mohicans since the disco darlings started in 1977—went out in search of heap big wampum, wanting to scalp our very own cute little Kurtis Scholz (pictured center right) (who was born six years after the official Death of Disco in 1979) and by using old Indian tracking methods (or probably asked some Gay guy) followed Kurtis to his job at Ticoz hoping he might get to put his tomahawk in Scholz’s sweet little Gitchigoomie. The MinneHaHa was on the aging chief, who went back to his Budget Teepee alone. Or at least without Kurtis, anyway. That handsome Benjamyn Gorski (pictured bottom) had so much fun at the Bar1 Heel Party last month with his boyfriend Manny Ybarra that he ate a fabulous Manolo Blahnik with an elegant little floral centerpiece, captured here on film for you to see. And that makes Ben the Party Penguin of the Month because he’s got so much “sole.” Just like me. (See paragraph #1). Frankly, I’d rather nibble on Manny, if I were you. Hallelujah! Send prayers and poop to Addison at RumorHound@aol.com May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 81
Aries Mar. 21 - Apr. 20
Surround yourself with friends and family! Sound like a pile of horseshit? It is. This month you have clearance for all the “Me” time you need. Not in the mood to socialize? Don’t. Wanna party? Go ahead! Then Don’t! A Virgo wants your attention.
Libra Sep. 23 - Oct. 22
You have the chance for a once in a lifetime experience—or you can stay by the side of someone who needs you, like you promised. Answer: invite the friend and share the experience—unless this involves sex with a Sagittarius. Two’s company; three is $50.
Taurus Apr. 21 - May 20
Scorpio Oct. 23 - Nov.23
You create a scandal because of your Honey Badger ways: you just don’t give a shit. That’s what makes you so ... so ... you know. You. If it’s your birthday you’ll just take what you want. You’re pretty bad-ass! That’s what all the Leos say.
The spiritual pennies you put into the Universal CoinStar deliver some muchneeded Karmic dollars for you to put in your pocket. When a bankrupt Virgo panhandles you’ll be tempted to share. Consider making a deposit with a groovy Gemini.
Gemini May 21 - June 21
Sagittarius Nov. 23 - Dec. 23
Cancer June 22 - July 22
Capricorn Dec. 23 - Jan. 20
Your unconventional approach to things, both, thrill and scare people. Kinda like Courtney Love. Don’t stop! If it’s your birthday: your devil-may-care acts of derring-do invites a Libra up on the tightrope of love with you.
You’re imposing several edicts, sanctions, embargoes, decrees and mandates this month. That’s so Cancer of you. Your Type-A personality has palace minions scrambling. Show mercy or you’ll have a revolt on your hands. A Scorpio is an excellent Prime Minister.
Leo July 23 - Aug. 22
A hasty, sperm-of-the-moment decision you recently made pays off. Considering the circumstances, you’re lucky, pal. Careful consideration—and wearing some clothes next time—might be a good idea, especially when a naked Sagittarius is involved.
Virgo Aug. 23 - Sep. 22
The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind. It might be in a light, summer breeze, or maybe a hurricane-level gale, but it’s out there! You don’t have to watch the weather on the news, but a Capricorn might know. 82
www.IONAZ.com May 2012
You deserve a gold star on your forehead for Good Citizenship Skills, winning at Angry Birds or something noble. Maybe it’s just for being great in the sack! Whatever it is, you’re tops! Or bottom. Whatever! An Aquarian calls the shots.
Broaden your horizons! Lengthen your vistas! You’re a regular Christopher Columbus as you set out on a voyage of discovery! Pack up the Niña, Pinta and Santa Maria it’ll be “Land Ho!” for you this summer. That ‘ho looks a lot like a Pisces to me.
Aquarius Jan. 21 - Feb. 19
One of your nutty, pie-in-the-sky, cockamamie, I Love Lucy-quality ideas doesn’t blow up in your face like a hillbilly’s rifle for once. We love you for your zany quirkiness, honey. Your noseat-belt-on-a-rollercoaster life invites an Aries late in the month. Whee!
Pisces Feb. 20 - Mar. 20
You hit pay dirt right when you’re ready to quit. Is it the mother lode or is it Fool’s Gold? It may not be the Klondike Gold Rush, but you’ll mine a few nuggets that will make you emotionally or spiritually wealthy. Just beware of a gold digging Taurus.
May 2012 www.IONAZ.com 83