5 Ways to Feel Better About Dating
In the majority of cases, to find your true match for a relationship, you have to commit some time and effort to date. And that is a field a lot of people lack experience and encounter major issues. The main reason lies with the inability to cope with rejection and the feeling of vulnerability that follows. If you are on the same boat and feel that your dating confidence can use a little boost, you should read on the following tips.
Knowing the fear means you will be less afraid – the more you are familiar with the fear, the less power it holds over you. Now, fear is normally not under your conscious control. It means that when you are subjected to a negative stressor, your body will automatically release stress hormones. And while this survival mechanism has helped humans evolve, it is of no help on a date. When adrenaline flows through you, it is hardly possible to feel yourself, until your body calms down. It is the accompanying symptoms that are bothersome – racing heart, sweating, voice shaking, etc. Now, to address this fear, you should get on board with your nervous system first. There are active exercises you can do to support this – yoga, meditation and physical
exercise. All of that can help you control your fear of being awkward around others.
Know that to look good is to feel good – if you don’t like the way you look, it is going to reflect on the way you feel too. That is why it is important to pay special attention to your outfit. You have to like it and it needs to be comfortable. Beyond that, you should be more mindful of what you wear and why you wear it. Most people are self-conscious on some level, typically having to do with having extra kilos. In this case, doing exercise and diet can boost your confidence. Other than that, to build self-acceptance, which is a superb quality, you need to learn how to accept and love yourself more.
Own the fear – if dates make you feel nervous and it shows, you can call it out. Be honest and use humour – your date might even love this! It is the best way to relieve pressure. Embracing vulnerability is the best way to break its hold on you. Acknowledge your fear and nervousness and call it out.
Own your body – being in a good physical state sends powerful signals to your brain, which then dictate your emotional state. That is why you should experiment with movements and postures, and note how they make you feel. What makes you feel more confident and open and what makes you more closed and afraid? Sometimes doing minor adjustments to the way you sit can have a boost on your confidence and dating performance.
Do a shift of mindset – a lot of people go on dates with the idea that they must present themselves in a way that the other will like and accept. But all this does is put all of the power in the hands of the other person. But don’t forget that it takes 2 to form a relationship. Always be choosy and understand that you have a say on the matter as well. It is not only a matter of whether they like you, but also whether you like them.
All of these tips work to boost your confidence and make you feel better about dating. Adopt them, and you will be one step closer to finding a great match in life. © Kate Mansfield Dating Coach