21 minute read
BLISSFUL BALANCE
bloodstream, as well as penetrate the cell membrane.
The therapeutic benefits of essential oils can be found only in the highest quality, 100 percent pure essential oils. Essential oils that have been adulterated, or even packaged improperly, will have greatly diminished benefits, and may even have harmful effects.
How can essential oils be used?
There are three ways to use essential oils: aromatically, topically, and internally.
Diffusing essential oils for aromatic use may positively affect mood, cleanse the air, and support the respiratory system.
Used topically, essential oils may provide localized benefits to the affected area. Dilute with a carrier oil, such as fractionated coconut oil, for best results.
To use internally, enjoy a drop or two in a glass of water or in a veggie cap. If you follow blissfull_balance on Instagram, you have seen my hashtag #ilovemyessentialoils – I do love my doTerra essential oils! I would love to help you to bring these amazing oils into your life. Message me and we can chat.
At Blissful Balance LLC our mission is to help you to live life healthier. You can follow us on Facebook @ blissfullbalanceroc and Instagram blissfull_balance.
HEALTHY SELF-ESTEEM
BY BONNIE FLOYD
What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is an individual’s subjective evaluation of their own worth. It encompasses beliefs about oneself, as well as emotional states. A healthy sense of self-esteem is neither too low nor too high. We are all familiar with those individuals who have an overly inflated sense of their self-worth, which produces narcissism.
Self-esteem is critically important to maintaining good mental health. This is because self-esteem has such a prominent influence on our choices and decisions. Self-esteem serves as a motivational force in shaping the decisions we make about taking care of ourselves, as well as exploring our full potential. Women with low self-esteem are less likely to maintain a healthy diet, exercise on a regular basis, and schedule regular healthcare visits and preventative testing. They are also far less likely to pursue new career options.
As a clinical psychologist, I often encounter women who have low selfesteem. This is manifested in many ways. Women in abusive relationships experience a reduction in their selfesteem, making it less likely for them to leave an abusive relationship. When a woman has experienced sexual trauma, it deeply damages her self-esteem. A woman with low self-esteem may lack the motivation to take better care of her physical health; she may mistakenly conclude that it is “selfish” to spend time exercising, when she could be doing something useful for someone else. Women with low self-esteem may settle for less demanding career options since they lack the confidence to pursue positions with greater degrees of responsibility. Sometimes, women with low self-esteem place undue emphasis on their personal appearances; they erroneously believe that a flawless exterior will compensate for how inferior they feel inside. I have worked with many single women who have poor selfesteem; they mistakenly conclude that finding the right relationship will finally “complete” them, not fully realizing that the healthiest relationships are formed
when two whole, healthy individuals meet one another.
Adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) are associated with the development of poor self-esteem. ACE’s may include sexual abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse, and/or neglect. After all, how could you possibly feel good about yourself if you encountered any type of ACE? Unfortunately, children may face multiple ACEs at the same time. Children who have experienced ACEs typically develop poor relational skills and low self-esteem; this increases the risk of developing interpersonal problems during adulthood.
There are several negative consequences associated with having low self-esteem. These include lacking appropriate boundaries in relationships, having difficulty with making your own decisions, as well as difficulty with speaking up and prioritizing your own needs, wants, and feelings. Women with low self-esteem often apologize profusely, and often feel guilty over their everyday actions. Low self-esteem frequently causes women to not “rock the boat.” It results in failing to be assertive when it is necessary to do so. In addition, possessing low self-esteem can result in not feeling deserving of, or capable of, having “more” in your life. Low self-esteem may result in doing things or buying things excessively for other individuals, in order to feel wanted, needed, and/or recognized. A negative self-perception is a hallmark of low self-esteem; women with this type of self-perception often think that others will not accept them for who they really are. Therefore, they adopt an external mask that attempts to conceal just how poorly they truly feel about themselves. Finally, women with low self-esteem typically have a critical, abusive internal dialogue; they engage in ongoing, negative self-talk.
To develop a healthy sense of self-esteem, it is important to address the following issues: use optimistic, positive statements; forgive yourself for past mistakes; avoid “should” and must statements; focus
on the positive; consider what you have learned to date; relabel upsetting thoughts; and encourage yourself. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be extremely useful for challenging a woman’s maladaptive thought patterns. It teaches women how to challenge their intrusive thoughts, examining if there is objective evidence that supports their beliefs. CBT offers training in how to substitute more adaptive thought patterns for erroneous beliefs.
There are several means of attempting to build your self-esteem. These include seeking professional help whenever necessary; prioritizing exercise that feels good for your body; consuming proper nutrition; outlining personal goals on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis; taking the time to reflect before automatically saying “yes’ to a request; engaging in positive self-affirmations; noticing, and then limiting comparisons to others; selecting an effective method of relaxation; and, replacing reflexive “I’m sorry” statements with more appropriate responses. Many women appear to struggle with comparing themselves to others, on a regular basis. Social media appears to have only intensified our unhealthy comparisons to one another, despite the reality that most women showcase the highlight reels of their lives on social media, as opposed to the less glamorous, behind the scenes events.
{ SHIFT+CONTROL }{ MANIFESTING YOUR TRUE PURPOSE } FINDING OUR CREATIVE VOICE
BY LISA WAGNER
HOW INNER WISDOM SERVES THE GREATER GOOD
As an artist, I had been led by depicting a beautiful scene in a way that might touch the viewer as my driving force originally. But one day that all changed. Although I still paint the astonishing world around us, I have fully changed my approach. Instead of depicting strictly what lie in front of me, I chose to ask for Divine intelligence to lead the way. I discovered it was where my creative voice had been all along. I had known it as a small child but had lost it along the way. There were too many outside influences, opinions and suggestions from well-meaning people but none of them sounded like me anymore. It took painting what would be an auction item, to find myself again.
Since my children were born, I have always strived to be more centered and in alignment with something greater than myself, aka love. I, personally call that “love” God and all that that energy has created in that likeness. (Although, I have used the term “Universe” or “Loving Light.” Whichever felt good and right at that moment.) The spirituality I have developed over the years went from believing that source was something outside of me, to the knowing that it is inside all of us. But what did that mean for me and the responsibility I had if I was filled with that light? Such a huge thing to contemplate and it’s one I meditate on daily. The biggest question I always ask is, “Is what I am doing or engaging in serving the greater good?” Not intimidating at all, right? There have been days I wasn’t very happy with the answer to that. It is quite humbling to see that what you are putting out into the world only adds to its pain. The beauty in the noticing of that momentary lapse in judgement is the gift of choosing again. That shift from darkness to the light may be subtle but yet it is so incredibly significant. I used to use such harsh self-talk while I worked. It stunted my growth as an artist and a human being. It held me in its shackles, small and afraid. Asking questions such as, “Does anyone even care about what I have to say?” or “Will anyone even look at this, let alone like it?” It kept me in a space that served no one. I was sad all the time and as if I was being judged by others continually. None of that was true. It was my own voice causing my inner turmoil.
That is until I was asked by Gilda’s Club to donate a painting for their upcoming fundraising auction. My father had gone through colon cancer treatment a few years prior, and Gilda’s was a huge reason he was able to cope and recover fully. This really meant a lot to me and to our family. I deeply felt that I wanted to honor that with my work. It also meant that I could choose to paint from a place of trust over one of manipulation and fear. (By the way, our choices are as simple as love or fear? Crazy, I know!) I chose to have faith fully and completely for the first time in my art career. In order to move into that space, I meditated each day upon waking, then upon entering my studio and finally before bed each night. Holy shift in mindset! There was a calmness that overtook my whole being. I could feel an energy with me that faithfully wanted my work to have a healing vitality. What happened next was so incredibly miraculous, that I still marvel at it with awe and wonder.
Before beginning the painting, I did my daily meditation and then blessed the canvas with my Palo Santo and sage, asking that only the angels of highest truth and compassion come through and show me the way. I also called on Gilda to show me how she would like to be portrayed in this piece. My initial thought had been to paint her likeness. What I didn’t realize was that wasn’t at all important to her. Gilda wanted the painting to invoke a sense of being held and seen. That they would know they were in the presence of angelic beings, even through their suffering. That had never occurred to me.
Once I began painting, I was hearing things like, “I’d really enjoy the colors blue and purple. Could you start with that?” I did so happily, as those are my favorite to begin with. There was a feeling of having accomplished what had been asked, of pure satisfaction & contentment. I then began to ask questions, not knowing at the time that I was being led towards what this spirit (who I believed was Gilda herself), had wanted me to know and achieve.
When I asked how I should paint the hair, I heard loud and clear that she wanted me to use the wrong end of the brush to have curls blowing in the wind. Next, I was told how to shape the face more accurately and that a flowing,
gauzy gown would be really lovely. I had to say, I totally agreed. Next, there was a request that she be floating over the mountains so that they could represent the difficult terrain those with cancer and their families must traverse. She wanted them to know that they could conquer the jagged moments and soar, no matter how painful the journey may be. This “soaring would require pretty wings,” I was told.
From there, what shapes, colors, stripes and where to place them were coming at me in quick succession. It was the most spiritual moment of my life, outside of the birth of my children. I was in the midst of an angelic experience that felt calm, yet surreal. It was also fun and freeing. I had fully left my ego behind and just let their messages and will flow through me. Their voice was so loving and magical. I had never felt so supported. I was reminded about what Drunvalo Melchizedek had said about what our minds are capable of once we free them from the voice of the ego. “As long as the mind and ego control the direction of creating, there will always be problems in the outer world. For the ego thinks only of itself and lives in duality. But when the heart is in control, everything comes back to balance. For the heart feels and knows only the oneness of life.”
The painting was beginning to balance itself out in a way that felt right and natural. There was no struggle, just joy. I found myself giggling throughout the process, hearing the silly way I was being instructed. It was like they were being allowed to play alongside me and cheering for every pretty brushstroke. Prior to this art experience, I have had a few pieces that I stood to look at what “I” had done and wasn’t sure who had done that piece. Serendipity leaves one breathless and in awe of what has been created. This, though, was a whole new level of creating. It let me see how I had a creative voice of value that may not even be mine, per say. I just happen to be the vessel that brings it into the light for all to hear and feel its messages. What a beautiful gift we have been given! It also helped me to heal the part of me that believed wasn’t worthy of something godlike speaking to me so clearly or to stand beside me in all of life’s moments. We actually are worthy and divinely encouraged to bring that light into our personal space and inner soul. It makes is possible then to send it out into the Universe for all to receive.
Tapping into our inner wisdom then allows for us to have the courage to connect, speak our loving truths and be creatively and exquisitely changing our world for the better. When we choose to open ourselves enough to trust the guidance available to us (call it your gut instincts, if you wish), we can unearth some surprisingly blissful gems we have been carrying within us, just waiting to be discovered. You have the ability to quiet the mind and listen to the loving whispers. You just need to be clear that only the highest truth and compassion angels come to come along. As Gabby Bernstein says, “You don’t want riff raff at your party!” Your space is sacred and filled with sparkling gems for you behold and enjoy. Then, you will be called to share them with the world. Your light and creative voice that are rooted in love, add to our restoration because you will have initiated your own soul’s healing. Ask yourself what gifts you have been withholding because fear (ego) has been lying to you? Stand up and boldly take that first step into the realm of light, love and possibility. Breathe in that peaceful energy and own your power of peace, love and healing. We are all cheering you on as my angel did while I painted.
Final note: I was reading “The Universe Has Your Back,” by Gabrielle Bernstein several months after finishing my painting, “I Am Here” which is now owned by Gilda’s Club in downtown Rochester. She had a chapter on Archangels and their descriptions. When I read about Archangel Raphael, I knew that was who must have been speaking to me during my painting. I then decided to look up his image (I really wanted to know what he looked like, seen as we had spent so much time together playing!). I was stunned to see my painting was almost identical to the first image that came up. I took a screen shot and later realized I took the picture at 4:44 in the afternoon. Three consecutive fours are known as the sign of angels being present. I was left crying tears of joy and amazement. I felt boundlessly loved and grateful. It still gives me goosebumps to recall that moment in my life, even as I write this. May you be equally as blessed, if not more so!
BEAUTIFULLY BROKEN
You already know how to lose weight. Everybody does. You eat less and exercise more. That’s it! That’s all there is to it. Eat less and move your body more. Do that often enough and long enough, and you’ll get skinny.Sounds simple, right?
Maybe even too simple. Because losing weight is hard. Trust me, I know. It’s taken me well over a decade. And I’m still not where I want to be. Eat less. Move your body. Why does something so simple feel so impossible? It feels impossible because we’re not just dealing with calories. We’re dealing with ourselves.
And understanding ourselves and why we do things is one of the hardest things for any of us to do. I believe that for everyone who is overweight and doesn’t want to be, there’s a story. There’s a story about how they got that way. Therefore, there needs to be a story for how they’re going to stop being that way.
Like I said, it all starts with a story, a real story. This is mine.For me, if i’m going to stick to a new lifestyle,
BY CINDY SCRIBANI
i have to find a way to enjoy it. If I don’t find a way to enjoy exercising, i will never stick with it. There is no happy ending for me because I’m focused on the present and what my goals are today. And when I reach those, I will have new goals to aim for.
There’s no endpoint for me. I never want to stop challenging myself in new and exciting ways. And I think that’s the best attitude one can have! You have to find something to drive you, something that can ignite your inner fire, and then let the rest take care of itself. There will be boring days and there will be plateaus and there will be days when you don’t want to get off the couch.
And the only way you can persevere through these moments is not by changing your diet plan or your workout routine. It’s by changing how you see yourself and how you feel about yourself. It’s finding your story and deciding to write the next chapters to it. Take each tiny decision on its own and stay focused on the present.
People get caught up in long-term visions of the future and lose hope. They think that if they lose such and such pounds that they’ll magically be happy. But that’s not how it works. It’s the process.
And just focus on what you can do now — don’t eat that dessert, go outside and walk 30 minutes.All of these things are a series of tiny choices, not any sort of dramatic lifestyle change.
MAY 2021
ARIES MAY 2021
You may be distracted from your family responsibilities this month but you, as usual will be able to juggle and you will merge forward with new found strength. An older person may need more of your attention.You are at a point of no return with your limitations as things are going to ease up for you after the New moon on the 26th.
TAURUS MAY 2021
Your birthday month is a real treat. Packed with opportunities and nice surprises. Communication is highlighted whether it be friends,relations or colleagues. You’re having thoughts on travels. So start scanning the net and make those long awaited plans.There is no package holiday for you ,as there is a thirst for new cultural adventure where there is a lot of wisdom to gain.
GEMINI MAY 2021
Money matters are prominent this month. You are usually very good at juggling your finances. There is a period of good fortune, which could be a windfall, a gift or inheritance. Knowing your signature trait, you have it spent before it is in your hands. You have worked exceptionally hard recently and deserve a break. if you are in a relationship. It’s time to seal matters. A child needs
BY ANGELA MCGHEE
your advice and expertise. Your creativity juices flow.
CANCER MAY 2021
Life in general seems to be one long slog during this month. You are weary and it’s time to evaluate you and give yourself a pat on the back on how you cope. A time to reflect and re-examine. Your deep sense of soul sees you through most things. Don’t forget your classic sensitivity is your strength. Meditate and you will receive your answers. A soulmate encounter brings you new hope.
LEO MAY 2021
Being placed as a leader in your work environment will help with confidence, something you have been lacking of late. You are attracting all sorts of characters this month.Your magnetism is at an all time high. You will enjoy the variety. Someone is acting like your guardian Angel, believe me they are. So much to learn this month. You may be brushing up skills on an educational course. You may find someone in your close circles thinks highly of you.
VIRGO MAY 2021
A time when you are seeking some kind of truth. Your mind is on overdrive. Take a step back and see things from other people’s perceptions. Someone outside of your circle will lead you to a new awakening. Your signature trait likes to have things in order. There could be a bit of disorganization and disruption at work where your level head is needed and your skills will shine.
LIBRA MAY 2021
There are strong emotions flying high this month,where you seem to be living a lot in the past, maybe you just feel safer there. Time to make decisions that could be life changing., but as we know decisions are not your faute. It may take the universal energy to help you make something final. Trust in your mind power and adaptability. Unexpected news of an engagement is likely too.
SCORPIO MAY 2021
When scorpio is in a playful mood,nothing will stop them. You are likely to attract new friends this month who will help empower you to get what you need in monetary terms. Joint adventures in a business deal is highlighted.too. New work experiences will get you an offer of some kind of promotion or extra responsibility. If you have to stand in for the Boss make sure you are well rehearsed and have that role play to perfection.
SAGITTARIUS MAY 2021
Many contacts in business are being made this month. You seem to be inundated. Even the ones
you think are not so beneficial turn out to be well starred. Career prospects are highlighted. Last minute travel to be expected could take you to some excotic places. A person in a very high position talks favourably of you. Keep your feet on the ground and keep your faith first and foremost. Dreams are coming true.
CAPRICORN MAY 2021
There is an innermost need to take a change of scenery. Getting in touch with your inner self becomes more important. You’re seeking solace and serenity. If you are looking for that someone special, they are closer than what you think. Time to evaluate your physical health by changing your regime and diet.You are on the brink of a total new you. Look out there could be an important message that arrives from a past link.
AQUARIUS MAY 2021
There seems to be a lot of unsettlement this month. Your frustrations and emotion run high. You just can’t seem to see the rhythm or reason to the confusion which is set around you. You need to step aside and examine the beginning of the process again to realize. A time to do a lot of soul searching and find purpose. A friend will help guide you. By the end of the month you will realise you are playing a crucial part in someone else’s lifes lessons.
PISCES MAY 2021
A seemingly serene month where nothing seems to disturb your inner peace.
You are now using your natural intuition in all aspects of your life.Time to take students under wing and teach them all you know about spirituality. A time to give generously You may be asked to fundraise or take part in a charity event. Your generosity is your second nature. You are at one with the universe this month and everybody can see it. A trip that surrounds you with water is beneficial.
Blessings INTERNATIONAL TV PSYCHIC MEDIUM AUTHOR TEACHER Angela McGhee T: +44 (0)778 956 3169 E:angelkm39@hotmail.com www.angelamcghee.com
