HER EDGE

GENERATION GAP

My daughter went off to college. I was ready and so was she. Friends kept asking me how I was managing with her being gone. Too quickly I would say, “fine.”

I always miss her, but if I must admit, after our tearful good-bye on the sidewalk in front of her dorm, and the long car ride home, I have not cried since.

It is not about missing her, it has more to do with shared space, drastically differences of opinions and the forty years that separate us. She was certain she was already an adult. It was a long, hot, summer of bickering, eyerolls, and blame. We had become roommates who needed a change.

She had her fill of me yelling up the stairs; “what’s my password,” “why is my phone not working,” and “where are my glasses?” I was tired of her impatience, constant video watching, picture snapping and brooding in her room. Our generation gap was obvious. I could not relate to her, and I was not sure I wanted to.

I dropped her off on a Saturday and I started a large project with a new client on Monday. I was relieved to have the new challenge to keep my mind off how empty the house felt and how sad the dog looked. I was asked to come into the office for an introductory meeting with the other members of the team I would be working with. To my surprise I was faced with a young woman, fresh out of college, who was smart, eager, and already seemed more connected to what was going on with the project than I was.

It felt like my daughter had magically graduated and was now my co-worker. I could feel myself begin to panic.

BY ROBIN DEWIND

we are Baby Boomers. When I first starting my business, I was trying to figure out how I could keep up and compete with Millennials.

My new colleague was Gen Z. I felt old and our greeting was awkward. She showed me to my computer. I immediately fumbled trying to navigate the log in. I was given the password and had already forgotten it.

For six weeks, we collaborated every day. Ironically, she shows up to the office, and I work remotely from home. When I reached out to let her know I would be away for a two-day trip but was available for a call or by email, all I got was, a text, “sounds good.” I thought she was dismissing me. Over time I started to understand that there may be a big gap in age, our differences are small.

Technology is everything, or is it?

Technology is a constant source of misery for me. My generation thrives on face-toface meetings. Our client is my age. A little advice on how to better communicate her questions and concerns changed how the boss responded to her. In exchange, she became approachable on all things technical.

Videos, videos, videos

She learns everything online. Who needs a classroom or a five-hour training course or even a book when you can just go to YouTube. Watching how she consumed content taught me there are diverse ways to get information. Google does not have all the answers, neither do I. It is never too late to learn, how to learn something new.

We stress out differently

It was a long six weeks with days that did not seem to end. I never felt like she was tired, needed a sleep pod or a game room to de-stress. She was committed and was willing to do the extra work to get the project done. We both admitted to our anxiety. She has attention issues, I have “worst case scenario” syndrome. We each found our own ways to cope with our stressors and confide when we would hit a mental roadblock.

My relationship at work helped me to better understand my daughter’s point of view. Telephone calls became easier, and we ended up communicating our daily activities by Snapchat. I suddenly enjoyed this form of mindless contact. I was so busy with my own life, I no longer had time for detailed telephone calls. I demanded nothing from her and refused to micromanage her life. She knows where I am, and when she wants to talk, I will always answer.

I have learned that we have more in common than the gap between us. I prioritized my friends, could not wait to get away from my parent’s authority and wanted to change the world.

Gen Z also gets an unwarranted professional reputation.

I had six jobs in the space of three years, hopping around opportunities until I landed my career. I was not disloyal or unwilling to commit. I found ways to educate myself along the way to an independent life. We should not fear the next generation but embrace their youth and ambition and serve as mentors rather than critics.

My work relationship helped to heal my parental one.

Instead of stereotyping our differences, it is time to embrace what we can learn from each other; at home and in the office.