Book Title
Adrienne Kerr
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Chapter 1: Rhys Chapter 2: Julien Chapter 3: Rachel Chapter 1: Trans Rememberance
Rhys
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Julien
I first realised I liked women’s clothing at a young age when I tried on tights. I never tried on makeup when I was younger but I always had a love for tights and pantyhose and always had an admiration for girls who could wear the freely without being judged. I thought it was wrong wearing tights, I considered it as a woman’s outfit, but around 10 years ago I started to wear high heels and dresses. Before then I’d only worn them maybe once as a teen. It’s about 25 years later and now I wear tights mainly in the winter. At the moment I dress at home but I’ve started going out in my car and driving around to work my confidence up. In the past years, I’ve contacted some women friends about liking to cross-dress. Most reacted well, and three of them ended up giving me tips. Two other of the women I told asked if I had turned gay and never expected me to dress up. On the whole, the advice has been good, I’ve been told some of the tights I use aren’t right for me and the clothes I wear have been too tight which give off the vibe of me being a bitch. I’ve also been told I’m a body type H (shoulders align with the waist and hips) which has helped me dress to suit my body. I’m thankful the women I’ve told have received the news well and have wanted to help me out, although it did take some time and did have to think hard about how I’d tell them. In the end, I feel better for it as it’s helped me feel more secure and help me find who my true friends are. The ones who can accept me for who I am.
When photographing myself, I tend to take pictures focusing on the outfit and crop out my face, I like people to see what I’m wearing first. I only show people the whole photo when I feel I know them, as it’s hard to trust people on the internet. I have a daughter, my baby girl; she’s 7. I’m waiting to tell her about myself when she’s older. I and her mother have a complicated relationship. She refuses to accept the fact that I cross dress which is why we’re not living together. I’m French and she’s American Mexican. It’s a difficult situation but I’ve found it’s better to show who I really am and not be accepted by one person than to hide my true self. If I look back and think what I’d say to my younger self it’s this: You should have started earlier in life. It will have made me more fearless and willing to talk to people easier; maybe I would have found a woman who will have been accepting. I have tried looking for a woman but with no success, possibly due to my location. But I’m 35 years old and living in a small city. I’m constantly busy with work too. Sometimes I feel I should go back to France or somewhere else in Europe where I think I’d feel freer. I don’t know yet If I’d be able to leave my daughter, time will tell.
Rachel
Trans rememberance
Many thanks to... Rhys Julien Rachel