Kids on the Coast Magazine - Sunshine Coast - Issue 73. March/April 2016 by Shore Media

ISSUE 73 March/April 2016 SUNSHINE COAST

www.kidsonthecoast.com.au

FREE TAKE ME HOME

Birthday issue

The ultimate party planner • Changing role of grandparents • Responding to angry children Life on the autism spectrum • Kids in the garden

[CONTENTS]

Cake by Cake Alchemy

Edward, 12mths

[WELCOME] We’re back into the swing of a new school year and new routines … and hold on, can it be almost Easter and school holidays again?! Time really does fly, and it’s just as hard to believe that it’s also our 12th birthday in March! To celebrate we’ve found some great products that you can win to help spread the birthday cheer. Check these out on pages 18 and 19, then head to our website for a chance to WIN! My family is still getting used to our new after-school routine with some new activities for my 9-year-old daughter and more of the same (much more of the same…) for my little dancer and her dance mum! Our afternoons and weekends may be a little hectic – there’s much to be said for not overscheduling, a topic I’m keen to explore in the future – but all that my girls love to do is made a little easier with the help of two very special people, my partner and my mum. We are so blessed to have Mum close to us here on the Sunshine Coast and she is a wonderful support to me and my siblings, our partners and her six grandchildren. Many grandparents are now more involved with their grandkids than ever before, and our feature article explores how this is not only great for the grandchild but for the grandparent as well. My kids cherish the time they spend with Grandma and it’s a special part of her life as well. One of the reasons grandparents are often involved in informal child care for their grandkids is the discrepancy between the working day and the school day, and our education article takes a look at the challenges this creates. When you are ready to slow the pace a little, take the opportunity to connect with nature by involving the whole family in some gardening. Check out our wellbeing section for some great ideas on how to get kids into the garden and growing their very own plants. Finally, if you’re ready to start planning some fun activities for the school holidays keep an eye out in mid-March for our Easter school holiday guide. With so many great things going on in our sunny corner of Queensland you and your kids will have a hard time choosing just what to do. As always, please feel free to contact our team via our website or email, and don’t forget to sign up for our What’s On eNews that comes out weekly at www.kidsonthecoast.com.au

3 FROM THE EDITOR

38 EDUCATION: Modernising school hours

4 WHAT’S ON: Find out what’s happening on the Coast during March & April

44 TEENS: Rites of passage

6 SOCIAL

48 PARENTS TALK: How do you raise a wild child?

8 WHAT’S NEWS

50 WELLBEING: Kids in the garden

10 FEATURE: The changing role of grandparents

54 MAKE & CREATE: A dozen egg-cellent ways to use up your Easter eggs

16 SPECIAL FEATURE: The ultimate kids’ party planner

56 F AMILY HEALTH: Life on the autism spectrum

18 CHECK THIS OUT: Let’s party!

61 WEB WRAP UP

24 BABIES: “Dear Baby, it’s me, Mum”

62 DESTINATIONS: LEGOLAND California

30 PARENTING FILES: STOP IT! Angry and aggressive children

64 LIFE STORIES: Lachlan Smart – ‘Wings Around the World’

36 PARENTVILLE: The battlefront

66 BOOKS – APPS – MOVIES

EDITORIAL CONTRIBUTORS: Kerryn Anker, Christine Humphreys, Megan Blandford, James McManis, Luke Denham, Jessica Jane Sammut, Kim Lahey, Cath Manuel, Pam Molnar, Dr Marnie Cumner, Eva Lewis, Natasha Higgins COVER PHOTOGRAPHY: Verve Portraits Printed with vegetable/soy based inks on paper supplied using pulp sourced from sustainable forests and manufactured to environmentally accredited systems. WE ENCOURAGE RECYCLING. Please keep this issue for future reference, pass onto your friends and family, use for craft projects or place into the recycling bin.

Natasha Higgins, Editor

kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

MAR/APR 2016

as o C e

WHAT'S ON n

Visit ou r website to see more events!

DON'T MISS OUT ON ANY EVENTS! Sign up at www.kidsonthecoast.com.au for our weekly What’s On guide. MARCH 9 TO 13 WORLD SCIENCE FESTIVAL BRISBANE With a huge program of free and ticketed events, science is coming out of the lab and onto the streets with topics ranging from deep space to deep oceans, the search for alien life, madness and creativity, sports science and ethics, engineering, design, maths, physics, dinosaurs, robots, comets, genetics, science fiction, reality, and technologies of the future. worldsciencefestival.com.au

DAILY MAJESTIC CINEMAS NAMBOUR A two-screen cinema with a great selection of films seven days a week. majesticcinemas.com.au

FEATURED MARKET NAMBOUR VILLAGE SQUARE MARKET Every Thursday from 9am to 2pm Live music, fresh plants, locally grown produce, great fashion and much more. www.facebook.com/NambourVillageSquareMarket

MARCH 13 FAMILY DAY AT NOOSA REGIONAL GALLERY On the second Sunday of each month kids of all ages can come along and have fun with free exhibitionrelated art-making activities. Children must be accompanied by a parent or adult guardian. noosaregionalgallery.com

MARCH 26 PURPLE DAY IN SUPPORT OF EPILEPSY purpleday.org

APRIL 12 FREE BABY CPR AND FIRST AID CLASSES The course will help you learn to stay calm and apply first aid when your child needs you most. Participants learn to identify, respond to and manage emergency situations immediately. first-aid-courses.com.au

MAR/APR 2016

This Earth Hour, s witch on your social powerto shine a light on climate action. earthhour.org Photo by © WWF Australia

MARCH 25 TO 28 HAPPY EASTER!

THURSDAYS TO MONDAYS BELLINGHAM MAZE

Everyone's favourite fairy tale ballet comes to life on stage in a new production of The Sleeping Beauty for children aged three and up. theeventscentre.com.au

Open to all school age children. Fully supervised by police and volunteers holding blue cards. Heaps of great prizes to be won! caloundrabluelight.org.au

Fearless optimist Anna sets off on an epic journey — teaming up with rugged mountain man Kristoff and his loyal reindeer Sven — to find her sister Elsa, whose icy powers have trapped the kingdom of Arendelle in eternal winter. Anna and Kristoff battle the elements in a race to save the kingdom. eventcinemas.com.au

MARCH 19 EARTH HOUR

APRIL 5 THE AUSTRALIAN BALLET PRESENTS STORYTIME BALLET: THE SLEEPING BEAUTY

APRIL 15 BEERWAH BLUE LIGHT DANCE PARTY

MARCH 12 DISNEY MOVIE STARS FILM FESTIVAL - FROZEN

A visit to the maze can be as active or relaxed as you like with activities to suit all ages. Try your skills in the hedge maze, play 18 holes of mini golf, visit the birds in the aviary or just sit in the café and enjoy your favourite coffee! bellmaze.com

TOP 5: BEACHES Point Cartwright, Buddina Golden Beach, Caloundra Alexandra Headland Coolum Beach The Spit, Mooloolaba

kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

MARCH 27 & APRIL 24 MINI STEAM TRAIN RIDES Kids love riding on these mini steam trains and diesel locomotives. Bring a picnic and make a day of it. scrms.org.au

* We publish information based on what is supplied to us - to the best of our knowledge all details are correct at the time of printing, however we do recommend you check event details with the organisers

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MAR/APR 2016

SOCIAL

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Join us ... for daily conversation, insp iration and information. IT’S BEEN GIGGLES WHAT YOU'VE LOVED ON FACEBOOK AND TRUTH OVER It seems there were some posts we shared on ON INSTAGRAM! Facebook that you simply couldn’t get enough of!

#yourtop5 #kidsinthecitymagazine #kidsonthecoastmagazine

If you haven’t checked them out yet, do yourself a favour and get online now!

ON PINTEREST!

Party time Planning a party but wouldn’t have a clue where to start, what theme to go for, what party food to have or what games to play? We have plenty of #inspo on our Pinterest pages! www.pinterest.com/kidsonthecoast/ kids-birthday-parties

Oh, and we have loads of

How to make pineapple favour bags Source: thehousethatlarsbuilt.com

MAR/APR 2016

How to make pretzel bunnies and ducks Source: onelittleproject.com

How to make Easter carrot treat boxes Source: ellaclaireinspired.com

Easter ideas too! Check them out here: www.pinterest.com/kidsonthecoast/easter

JOIN US! 6

Lego party ideas Source: catchmyparty.com

Here are a few of our favs:

We want you to be part of our sisterhood! If you’re not part of our tribe of awesome mamas yet, make sure you come and say hello soon at www.facebook.com/kidsonthecoast or www.facebook.com/kidsinthecitymagazinebrisbane. We’d love you to be part of our community! #kotcsisterhood #kitcsisterhood kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

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MAR/APR 2016

Stay up to date with your local community news. If you have any unique news that you’d like to share, please contact our editor at publications@mothergoosemedia.com.au

Whats news » Visit our website for more news, www.kidsonthecoast.com.au/news

MUSIC TO THEIR EARS!

A host of local children have landed their dream roles in the upcoming production of The Sound of Music. A total of 18 rising stars from the Sunshine Coast, Brisbane and the Gold Coast have been selected to appear as the six youngest von Trapp children when the hit musical comes to Brisbane’s QPAC Lyric theatre from March 11. Three different casts for the roles of the children will alternate for the duration of the production’s run in Brisbane. Among those chosen to star in the musical include Stella Charrington (8) from Mount Gravatt, Nina Le Vesconte (11) from Brighton and Alyssa Myers (11) from Acacia Ridge. The Sound of Music will run at the QPAC theatre from March 11 until April 24. To book tickets visit www.qpac.com.au.

PAP SMEARS NO LONGER FREE Pap smears – they’re not the most enjoyable of examinations and now you will have to pay for them too. The government is set to cut its bulk-billing incentive payment scheme in July. This means patients will pay at least $30 for pap smears, along with other pathology tests such as urine tests, and diagnostic imaging services like ultrasounds. These tests help to detect cervical cancer and, as chief executive of Sonic Healthcare Dr Colin Goldschmidt points out, the costs may deter some women from having the test. “It creates a financial barrier to receiving medical services and it discriminates against those who can’t afford services,” he told the Sydney Morning Herald. “It creates an incentive for patients to miss important tests or scans that can lead to a misdiagnosis or a delayed diagnosis.”

REVITALISED SUNSHINE COAST RECREATION CENTRE REOPENS The Sunshine Coast Recreation Centre at Currimundi has reopened following a $7.16 million facelift. The improvements include revamped accommodation, an undercover outdoor eating area, an indoor rock wall and a two-story caving system, the first of its kind in Australia. The centre was officially opened by Treasurer and Minister for Sport Curtis Pitt in February. He said the changes mean families can now stay over weekends and during the school holidays, with more additions to come. “To add to these changes, in April this year a suite of new camp packages will be introduced to better cater for groups and their individual needs,” he said. “These will include unlimited facility access, more flexible options, as well as themed and curriculum-based programs for school groups. The Sunshine Coast Recreation Centre is now on par with some of Australia’s premier recreation centres, with the added bonus of being located on the doorstep of stunning Currimundi Beach,” he added.

MAR/APR 2016

DID YOU

KNOW MOST PEOPLE TAKE AN AVERAGE OF

7 MINUTES TO FALL ASLEEP

The cat is the only domestic animal not mentioned in the Bible IT IS ILLEGAL TO SWEAR IN FRONT OF A DEAD PERSON IN UTAH

MOOLOOLABA SNAPPER FISH

IS THE ABORIGINAL WORD FOR

SUNSHINE COAST IS THE BIRTHPLACE OF THE SAYING

‘FAIR DINKUM’ kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

AUSTRALIA ZOO WELCOMES NEW PAIR OF TIGER CUBS

Australia Zoo has welcomed some new additions to its family after one of its tigers gave birth to two cubs in February, her second litter in three years. The cubs – one male and one female – were born to mum Kaitlyn, a Sumatran tiger. She last gave birth to two male cubs, Hunter and Clarence, in 2013. There are currently less than 500 Sumatran tigers left in the wild and Giles Clark, head of the tiger department at the zoo, said the new arrivals are a big boost for the captive breeding program of these endangered animals. “They signify an important milestone by continuing the wild bloodline of Sumatran tigers in the global breeding program… Cubs like these are the insurance protecting tigers from disappearing altogether,” he said. Visitors will be able to see the cubs for the first time in late April.

BID TO CONTROL SPREAD OF ZIKA VIRUS IN QUEENSLAND

Queensland Health authorities have begun spraying areas in a bid to control the spread of the Zika virus. As of February 29, nine cases of the Zika virus had been confirmed among people living in Queensland, one of whom is pregnant. Spraying has been carried out in Townsville and Rockhampton. The virus is spread by mosquitoes and has been linked to microcephaly, where babies are born with underdeveloped brains. Queensland Health says the disease is not known to be present in local mosquitoes. Queensland Health warns women who are pregnant or trying for a baby to consider avoiding travel to areas with current outbreaks of the disease. For more information see www.health.qld.gov.au

COUNT DOWN THE DAYS

Count Dracula and Mavis are coming!

Get ready to party and join Count Dracula as he throws Mavis a kitchen tea. Plus, get creative in our craft village!

Hotel Transylvania 2 Live Shows

Craft Village

Dates:

Tuesday 29 March Saturday 2 April Show Times: 11am and 1pm Meet and Greet Times: 12pm and 2pm Location: Food Court Cost: Free

Tuesday 29 March Friday 8 April Times: 10am - 2pm Location: Opposite Ella Bache Cost: Free

For more fun activities, competitions and giveaways these school holidays, visit noosacivic.com.au or collect a flyer in Centre. Big W • Woolworths • 100 specialty stores 28 Eenie Creek Rd (Cnr Walter Hay Drive) Noosaville Ph 5440 7900 kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

MAR/APR 2016

[FEATURE]

From retirement to running after toddlers THE CHANGING ROLE OF GRANDPARENTS by KERRYN ANKER

IN THE EVOLVING PARENTAL LANDSCAPE OF THE 21ST CENTURY, THE SAYING THAT IT TAKES A VILLAGE TO RAISE A CHILD COULDN’T BE MORE ACCURATE. Once seen as the storytellers of our family history and the open door lolly store meeting the needs of every grandchild’s sweet tooth, the traditional role of a grandparent has been redefined over the last 20 years, with Grandma and Grandad becoming the most popular form of informal care for children aged 12 years and under. According to the 2014 Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS) Childhood Education and Care Australia report, 836,000 Australian children aged 0–12 years were cared for by a grandparent for an average of 10 hours per week. A myriad of financial challenges, inflexibility of formal child care and societal expectations on parents are not the only driving factors pushing grandparents into the role of surrogate parent. Many grandparents also place a high importance on wanting to develop and nurture their relationship with their grandchildren. In the 20th century, the younger generation tended to undervalue the older generation, with grandparents typically not seen to be active contributors to everyday society. In the present day, research shows that grandparents are not only providing quality child care, but by providing free child care, they are reducing the everyday financial burden on their children who are saving on average $400 a month in child care costs. Griffith University School of Human Services and Social Work lecturer Dr Sandra Woodbridge says many Australian grandparents have a deep desire to form a close bond with their grandchildren, while at the same time providing a helping hand to their own children. With the change in family dynamics and the involvement grandparents now have in their grandchildren’s everyday lives, they have transitioned from observers to active participants in the development and growth of the younger generation.

MAR/APR 2016

“Early literature from the 1960s states that a grandparent’s role was seen as being more symbolic – being kept at an arm’s length from their grandchildren. They were there to share the family history, be part of social activities and the fun times,” Dr Woodbridge says. “These days, in western culture, grandparents play a more instrumental role, providing support with the household budget, paying school fees and helping out with a grandchild’s daily activities. “With an ageing population in Australia, grandparents are also looking after their own parents, as well as helping their children and grandchildren.” Dr Woodbridge says her research shows that although there can be added pressure, expectations and stress on grandparents when taking on the child care duties of their grandchildren, there are many positives for all parties involved. After looking after children of their own, grandparents have confidence in their parenting ability and a clear understanding of what worked and didn’t work during their own parenting journey. Dr Woodbridge’s research also found that grandparents get a high level of satisfaction from spending quality time with their grandchildren. “Having another person playing an active role in a child’s life can be a very positive thing. They do become another role model for a child,” Dr Woodbridge says. She says for this type of arrangement to work there needs to be realistic expectations on both sides – from the grandparents and their children – on what their roles are, as well as what their involvement with the grandchildren will be.

kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

[FEATURE]

kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

MAR/APR 2016

[FEATURE]

The role of a grandfather has also changed dramatically over the years. While grandmothers have always been seen as the cornerstone to a family, in the past, grandfathers were less involved than they are today. It’s not uncommon for grandfathers today to have a hands-on approach with their grandchildren, from taking them to swimming lessons to changing dirty nappies.

Valerie says grandparents can pass on a sense of wisdom and an unconditional love, playing a vital and influential role in a child’s life. On a personal level, Valerie’s own father played an active role in her daughter’s life. More than just a grandfather, he became a father figure and a role model, taking his granddaughter to swimming lessons as well as teaching her how to drive.

The child-rearing environment has dramatically changed over the years, causing some challenges and confusion for grandparents. Terms like ‘tiger mum’, ‘helicopter parent’ and ‘free-range parenting’ are foreign concepts to the older generation. Gone are the days of cloth nappies, sugar is now a big no-no and many childhood activities children participate in are now designed with a set curriculum that nurtures their individual skill set while contributing to their growth and development.

Gold Coast mum Shannan Walker says even before she had given birth to her son, Archer (2), her mother Missy Van Roon had offered to help out when needed. From the very early discussions, Shannan says she made sure her mother still had time to enjoy her retirement and that there was open and honest communication.

Relationships Australia relationship and family counsellor Valerie Holden says at a time when many retirees could be slowing down, they are instead accelerating at full speed, trying to keep up with their grandchildren. She says the old saying ‘I love being a grandparent – you can hand them back when you want’ may no longer be relevant. The traditional role of a stay-at-home mum is no longer the norm and in many relationships both parents have to work in order to pay the mortgage, household expenses and bills. “As grandparents, it is a good idea to sit down with your children and talk about what and how you are prepared to help them when they become parents. Look at your own needs and boundaries. What do you both think is a fair and manageable in your lifestyle?” Valerie says. “When children have loving, understanding grandparents, this adds a great dimension to their lives. But when these grandparents are also taking on a parental role, some of this can be lost. We move from the space of now and again fun and time at Grandma and Grandad’s to more structured and consistent time with more responsibility.” Valerie says the positives of children spending quality time with their grandparents are that they develop a deep respect for the older generation, as well as an appreciation for their family history. Who better to play the storyteller than the people who have lived through the tales that have shaped the foundations that the family unit is built upon.

Having another person playingan active role in a child's life can be a very positive thing. They do become another role model for a child. ~ Dr Woodbridge 12

MAR/APR 2016

“I was on maternity leave for a year and always planned on going back to work fulltime. When I fell pregnant, mum had already retired and said she was happy to look after Archer two days a week so that I could return to work,” she says. “Archer has formed a great relationship with my mum and he just loves his time with nanny. Mum and I really work well together – she’s never pushed her thoughts onto me on how I should raise Archer. I think that is why it works so well.” Shannan says her arrangement with her mum is great because both parties are respectful of each other’s needs, in an endeavour to avoid any stress or tension. Missy says she cherishes the time she spends with her grandson and although some days are more exhausting than others, she wouldn’t have it any other way. “My kids didn’t have that close a relationship with my parents as we lived so far away from them. Because of this, I wanted to have a close relationship with my grandson,” she says. “I love the quality time I have with him and as much as I fit into his life, he also fits into my life. He’s very adaptable and comes along when I catch up with my friends and he enjoys playing with my friend’s children.” Missy says it’s a great arrangement for all involved, with Archer spending two days with her, one day with a family friend and two days in formal day care. Australian Institute of Family Studies (AIFS) senior researcher Jennifer Baxter has conducted considerable research analysing the trends of child care and the role grandparents play in the upbringing of a child. Around three in ten Australian parents find it difficult to find care for a child at short notice as well as feel the financial pinch due to the cost of formal care. Jennifer’s research shows that the reason families call upon grandparents to help with their children varies from household to household, however noticeably, a common theme among grandparents is that they enjoyed building a relationship with their grandchildren as well as being actively involved in their lives. “Statistics show that younger children are more commonly looked after by a grandparent. This is mainly due to the flexibility that grandparent care provides a parent, and families really like the relationship side of it,” says Jennifer.

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MAR/APR 2016

[FEATURE]

I love the quality time I have with my grandson and the close relationship that we have. ~ Missy Van Roon

“It’s a special type of care for a child as it builds a strong bond between both grandparent and grandchild. This provision of care however is not always set in stone and there can be a flow-on effect to the parents if a grandparent falls ill and is unable to care for the children.” The AIFS Child care and early childhood education in Australia research findings show that grandparents are more likely to provide care for children under the age of two. During the 2011 survey period, around 63% of children aged 0–12 years of age spent one or two weekdays in the care of a grandparent. Jennifer says formal education becomes more important to parents as children get older. For some parents, grandparents continue to be the glue around other care arrangements, with them helping with school drop-off and after school care. “People these days are working all different hours and not working the typical 9–5,” she says. “It is common for grandparents to be called upon in this situation, as they provide the flexibility that formal day care may not.” Many grandparents who provide informal care for their grandchildren do so with no financial assistance. The Department of Education and Training state that the financial assistance provided to grandparents depends on the individual care situation. Under the government’s Jobs for Families Child Care Package currently being considered by parliament, grandparents who are primary carers of their grandchildren will have greater access to government subsidised child care benefits. Grandparents on income support who are primary carers of their grandchildren will receive a subsidy equal to 100% of their child care fees (up to 120% of the Child Care Subsidy hourly cap). These grandparents will not have to meet the Child Care Subsidy activity test and will be able to access up to 100 hours of subsidised approved child care per fortnight. Grandparent primary carers who are not on income support will also be exempt from the Child Care Subsidy activity test and will be eligible for up to 100 hours of subsidised approved child care each fortnight with the subsidy rate based on their family income. Whether being full-time carers or providing informal care, spending time with grandchildren is not only fulfilling for a grandparent, it is also believed to boost brainpower as well as help to prevent feelings of isolation, which can lead to depression. The Women’s Healthy Ageing Project carried out by the The University of Melbourne Department of Medicine found that grandparents who cared for their grandchildren one day a week may have a lower risk of developing Alzheimer’s. After observing the cognitive function of more than 186 women, researchers found that the grandmothers who care for a grandchild for at least one

GRANDPARENT SUPPORT GROUPS AND PLAYGROUPS 14

MAR/APR 2016

day a week scored the highest on the tests, with faster cognitive speed and better memory. Researchers believe the regular social interaction had a positive effect on the senior’s mental health. However, they also found that grandparents who spent five or more days caring for grandchildren had lower cognitive performance. In 2011–2012, the Triple P – Positive Parenting Program (www.triplep-parenting.net.au) ran a controlled trial with 54 grandparents who provided regular care for their grandchildren. The program involved the refreshment of parenting strategies, tools on how to work together as a team as well as coping strategies for stress and other unhelpful emotions. University of Queensland Parenting and Family Support Centre clinical psychologist Dr James Kirby found that after the completion of the nine-week program, the 54 grandparents had more confidence in their ability to look after their grandchildren, had decreased levels of stress and had built a stronger relationship not only with their grandchildren, but also with their own children. Although the trial has been completed, grandparents are still encouraged to take part in the Australia-wide Triple P program, which is said to benefit all three generations involved – grandparents, their children and grandchildren. Playgroup Queensland has also recognised the valuable work of grandparents, recently opening their first playgroup for grandparents in Ascot, Brisbane. Already proving extremely popular, the playgroup was established to provide a welcoming place where grandparents could socialise with other grandparents and feel supported, while at the same time providing a safe and fun environment for their grandchildren to play with other children. Grandparents across the country play different and varied roles in their grandchildren’s lives. Although some grandparents are unable to participate actively in their grandchildren’s everyday lives due to location or family circumstances, research shows any involvement is influential and has long-term positive effects. For Missy Van Roon, retirement has been made that much sweeter by spending her free time with her grandson. “I always wanted to be a grandma and be a part of my grandchildren’s lives,” Missy says. “I love the quality time I have with my grandson and the close relationship that we have.”

For information on grandparent support groups in Queensland, visit Grandparents Information www.grandparentsqld.com.au/program/grandparent-support-groups To find out if there is a playgroup for grandparents in your area, visit Playgroup Queensland www.playgroupqueensland.com.au

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MAR/APR 2016

[SPECIAL FEATURE]

IT'S OUR

BIRTHDAY!

To celebrate weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve found some great products that you can win to help spread the birthday cheer. Check these out over the page and visit our website to enter.

MAR/APR 2016

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[SPECIAL FEATURE]

THE ULTIMATE

KIDS’ PARTY PLANNER by CHRISTINE HUMPHREYS

PARTY DAY IS GREAT FUN FOR THE PARTY KIDS…BUT PARTY PLANNING CAN BE A WHOLE LOT OF FUN DAYS FOR YOU. WHETHER YOU ARE AN EVENT PLANNING GODDESS OR WOULD PREFER TO RUN A MARATHON THAN A PARTY, OUR COMPLETE PARTY COUNTDOWN TIMELINE AND CHECKLIST IS FOR YOU.

Let the countdown begin! 4 TO 8

WEEKS OUT

PICK A DATE AND TIME Younger kids often handle a morning party better and this tires them out for an afternoon nap! School-age children can power through afternoon parties, which leaves the morning free for last-minute party planning or regular weekend sporting events. Consider a midweek party if you don’t want to impede on family time.

DECIDE ON THE VENUE If you choose a dedicated children’s party venue select and reserve this now as they do book up fast. If you are hosting an outdoor party, have a back-up plan in case of bad weather.

BOOK THE ENTERTAINMENT Face painters, clowns, party planners, photographer; the choices are endless – book early to avoid disappointment. If you have a talented friend, enlist their help now!

CREATE THE GUEST LIST

DECIDE ON INVITATIONS

Deciding who to invite can be fraught with difficulties. Will you invite both family and friends or just school/daycare friends? To keep it simple, a great idea is to invite one friend per year of age, e.g. 6 kids to a 6th birthday party.

Decide whether to make your own invitations, buy printed invitations or order personalised invitations. See www.etsy.com for great digital options.

CHOOSE A THEME If you are partying at home your theme options are endless so let your child’s imagination do the work for you. If you are partying at a venue, most will have a range of themes for you to consider.

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MAR/APR 2016

[SPECIAL FEATURE]

DONUT PARTY

These fun donut party plates, cups and napkins by We Love Sundays will brighten up any party table. Complete your party theme with matching treat bags to fill with colourful goodies for your guests to take home. Pick up a few of these yummy, high quality sets from online stockists including www.larkstore.com.au and www.hipandhooray.com.au or at Mama’s Home in Brisbane (www.mamashome.com.au).

2 TO 3 WEEKS OUT SEND INVITATIONS Whether you e-invite guests or send out handwritten invitations do this now. Ensure you have a RSVP date on there around four days prior to the party. This gives you enough time to chase up any guests who haven’t RSVP’d. Keep a guest list near the phone to track the RSVPs as they come in.

SELECT ACTIVITIES/ GAMES AND ASSEMBLE PRIZES This can be so much fun! Enlist your child’s help and do practice runs of the games. Decide on the order of activities and make a timeline for the day. Enlist the assistance of a reliable adult to help run the games.

DECIDE ON PARTY FAVOURS AND DECORATIONS Party bags, a specific gift to suit the theme or a lolly bag to fill under the piñata? Decide and start preparing these now. Decorations can be as simple as a string of balloons or you can go all out to match in with the theme.

PLAN THE CAKE It is time to place your order or if you are baking the birthday cake yourself start planning the ingredients and decorations you will need. You may want to follow your party theme here or just bake your child’s favourite flavour.

PLAN THE FOOD The type of party food will depend on the guest numbers and time of day your party is held. For an after school party, a selection or fruit, popcorn and small cakes is all you need. For a lunchtime party, you will need something more substantial. Also consider some options for common food intolerances and an adult’s only platter.

MAR/APR 2016

PIRATE

1 WEEK OUT WRITE YOUR SHOPPING LIST

BALLERINA

Make a list and check it twice! Include food, party favours, cutlery, decorations, candles for the cake and something to light it with! Of course, in all this planning, don’t forget a present for your child if it is a birthday party.

ASSEMBLE PARTY BAGS/FAVOURS

PRINCESS

This can be done at any time but you can finalise the number once you have your RSVPs. Always make a couple extra for those who just turn up on the day!

PARTY PREP Tidy and prepare the party area. If you are outside, ensure you have a shaded area and chairs set up. You might want to ask parents to BYO chairs.

SUPERHERO

GET COOKING Collect your cake if you have ordered it or start baking! Start preparing your party food or order takeaway (such as pizza or sushi) if necessary.

MANNERS Discuss party expectations with your child and practice saying ‘thank you’ with younger kids.

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THEMED CRAFT PARTY PACKS

Don’t be daunted by the thought of entertaining all the kids when hosting your next birthday party. PeekyMe has come up with some fabulous themed craft activities to keep those little creative minds ticking for hours. Best of all, you can mix and match between the themes – ballerina, princess, pirate and superhero – to suit everyone’s tastes. Select a minimum of 8 packs for $9 each from www.peekyme.com.au.

[SPECIAL FEATURE]

VINTAGE PAPERBOY 1ST BIRTHDAY OUTFIT

PARTY

Is there a little man in your life with a dose of old-time charm? This super soft authentic wool look set in grey and mint is the perfect way to showcase your little guy at his 1st birthday party or an upcoming cake smash photo shoot. The four-piece set created from high-quality fabrics includes a lined newsboy style hat with hidden elastic in the back for a snug fit (and allows for growth), a bow tie with adjustable neck strap for ease of use, adjustable elastic suspenders and a nappy cover with elastic at the waist and thighs. You’ll find this cute set and many others made by Sonia at BuBBling Boutique at www.etsy.com/au/shop/ BuBBlingBoutique or www.bubblingboutique.com.au.

FOOD PIÑATAS & PAPIER-MÂCHÉ FIGURES

Add an extra special touch to your child’s next birthday party with an original piñata or papiermâché figure handcrafted by Lyn and Jan from The Paper Tarts on the Sunshine Coast since 2000. See the range currently available at facebook.com/ thepapertarts. Place an order for your very own custom-made piñata or papier-mâché figure by email at thepapertarts@gmail.com.

CRAFT SUBSCRIPTION BOXES

Children will love receiving their very own PeekyMe box each month delivered to their door containing craft activities that cultivate creativity and encourage wonder through learning and curiosity. Each box contains four unique craft activities with child friendly instructions and all the materials required to complete each craft activity. The end result will be hours of entertainment while learning, assembling and designing a mini masterpiece to be used however their imagination chooses. Choose from monthly subscriptions for only $24.95 per month including delivery (billed monthly, cancel anytime) or annual subscriptions for $275 which includes one month free. Gift subscriptions are also available for one, three, six or 12 months, which can be sent directly to the recipient or via an e-gift card. Make your selection at www.peekyme.com.au.

Fairy bread Sausage rolls Vanilla cupcakes Mini hot dogs Rumballs Caramel fudge Chocolate crackles Pizza scrolls Chocolate freckles Chicken drumsticks Mini pizzas Banana pikelets Honey joys Tic Toc teacups Chocolate mousse cups Mars Bar slice Frog in a pond Cake pops Coconut ice Teddy bear race cars Scones with jam & cream

HEALTHY FOOD IDEAS

FAIRY BREAD SEQUIN PURSE

Remember when you were six and your birthday was something to get excited about? Really, really excited about? Presents, games, some balloons, all your friends, a giant cake and of course fairy bread. Make Me Iconic decided they looooooooooooved fairy bread so much that they recreated their favourite party treat as a gorgeous little fabric and sequin purse (8cm x 20cm) – a perfect gift for all little (and big!) girls! Purchase yours online for $17 at www.makemeiconic.com

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Bliss balls Veggie sticks with dip Vegemite and cheese scrolls Chicken, zucchini and quinoa nuggets Pita bread chips Brown rice sushi rolls Corn, tomato and spinach muffins Fruit kebabs with yoghurt dip Zucchini slice Chicken salad rice paper rolls Fruit salad with passionfruit syrup Homemade pita chips Beetroot dip Carrot and quinoa cake Three ingredient muesli balls Wholemeal egg and lettuce sandwiches Apple cars Yoghurt cups Celery sticks with peanut butter dip Chicken and vegetable sausage rolls Pita bread pizzas

MAR/APR 2016

[SPECIAL FEATURE]

LOLLY-FREE

PARTY

BAG

Enjoy this day with your child.

DAY OF THE PARTY 4–5 HOURS BEFORE GUESTS ARRIVE Set the table, lay out activities/crafts and put out the decorations. Tie balloons to your mailbox so your home is easy to find. Have the candles and lighter ready to go. Don’t forget to have a large garbage bag on hand for the wrapping paper.

1 HOUR TO GO If you have a pet take them to a quiet, safe place until the party is over so your furry friend doesn’t become overwhelmed. Get your party gear on! Put the food out and candles on the cake.

IDEAS FROM MUMS AROUND THE WEB...

TIME TO PARTY Greet each guest with your child. If parents are dropping off, confirm pickup time and ensure you have emergency contact numbers. Enlist another adult to take photos and remember to get a family photo with the party child and their special cake. Enjoy this fun day! Even if things don’t go to plan, the important thing is that you and your children have a good day.

THE AFTER MATH

• Pencils • Mini notepads • Matchbox cars • Mini puzzles • Stickers • Colouring book • Playdough • Toothbrush • Hair clips & bands • Paint set

TRY THESE

PARTY GAMES

• Dog and bone • Who am i? • Sleeping lions, or tigers, rabbits, elephants, etc • Sticky monkey • Balloon rockets • Round the broomstick • 'Magic' photographer

TIDY UP! Help your child write thank you notes to party guests.

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MAR/APR 2016

ou l l u P

[SPECIAL FEATURE]

PARTY CHECKLIST WHEN TASK

MAR/APR 2016

4 – 8 weeks out 2 – 3 weeks out 1 week out 1 day out The day of! During the party

o o o o o o o

Pick a date and time Decide on the venue Wet weather alternative Guest list Theme Book entertainment Order or make Invitations

o o o o o o

Send invitations Decide on party games/activities Assemble prizes and prepare the games Decide on party favours and decorations Order or start planning the cake Prepare food menu

Afterwards

o Help your child write thank you notes to party guests

o Write shopping list o Assemble party bags/favours/decorations o Collate RSVPs o Tidy house and set up party area o Get cooking and finish or collect the cake o Prepare your child o o o o

Decorate and set up activities Lay out the food and put candles on the cake Take your pet to a safe place Get your party clothes on

o o o o o o

Be the ‘Hostess with the Mostess’! Tick off your checklist Get emergency contact numbers for parents if they are dropping off Take photos Enjoy! Hand out party bags

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[BABIES]

“Dear Baby, it’s me, Mum”

by MEGAN BLANDFORD

THE CHILDHOOD YEARS OF OUR OFFSPRING GO FAST – REALLY FAST. AND, AS WE GET CAUGHT UP IN THE DAY-TO-DAY HAMSTER WHEEL OF NECESSARY TASKS, IT’S EASY FOR THAT TIME TO WHIZ BY IN A BLUR. Ask any parent of older or grown-up children what life was like when their kids were little and you’ll usually get a vague response. It might be a feeling – “Those were the happiest days of my life” they’ll recall, as those who have just had ten sleepless nights in a row begin to understand just how much those parents have forgotten – or a series of big events that are easily recalled, like a baby who suffered colic or a family holiday that was taken. To help jog their memory, the parent in question might pull out a baby book. While baby books have been around forever, marking the dates of the milestones such as your little one’s first steps, first word and first tooth, parents are now finding new ways to record memories. This is, perhaps, due to a realisation that the big things are great, but the little moments that fade away into oblivion are really some of the best treasures. And so, creative ideas are emerging for ways to record those little things – the way your little one says a word, how they need to cuddle a specific toy to fall asleep every night or the way you feel at a certain point in their life. Some of these methods are simple ways of recording the memories, while others are more of a communication tool to speak with your child in their future years. Then, when they’re older and ask what life was like when they were little, they receive more than a vague reply; they receive a sort of letter to themselves in some form or other. As though you’ve been saying to them since the early days: “Dear baby, it's me, Mum.” …

MAR/APR 2016

BIRTHDAY LETTERS While it can be hard to keep up with the idea of writing down memories or letters to your child’s future self all the time, doing so once a year is really achievable. And what better time to reflect on your child than on their birthday? With another year of life behind them and a new stage ahead, it’s possible that you already feel a little reflective and perhaps a mixture of sad and excited at the things that have passed and the things that are to come, so why not put pen to paper. Each year, mum of two Danielle writes a letter to each of her children on their birthday. “It’s a chance to look back over the year and reflect on how far they’ve come,” she says. “And when they’re older they’ll get a really good idea of what they were like as children.” This is, perhaps, the ultimate way to speak to your child’s future self, and could result in some very powerful memories being recorded. If you’re considering this idea but you’re not sure where to start with your letters, ask yourself these questions: What is your favourite memory of your child over the last year? What does your child love doing? What do they dislike? How are you feeling about the person they are becoming? Think back to last year and write about the differences that a year has made to them. What are you excited about for your child over the coming year?

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Babies may be born with a flat or misshapen head from their position in the birth canal, however the majority of babies develop a flat head by favouring sleeping to one side. Many parents are told that their babies flat head is a cosmetic problem and will resolve with time. Unfortunately research suggests that this is not the case and that developmental delays may be associated with babies having a flat head(1)(2). Tiny spinal misalignments resulting from the position in the canal or as a result of the birth process can cause your baby to favour one side and develop a flat head. The good news is that with chiropractic treatment your baby’s underlying neck problem can be corrected. Your baby will then start to look to both sides and the head shape will start to correct itself naturally.

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The earlier your baby starts chiropractic treatment, the easier it is to correct the flat head. The later the treatment starts, the longer it takes and the less likely it will be completely corrected.

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(1) Case-control study of neurodevelopment in deformational plagiocephaly. Speltz ML, Collett BR, Stott-Miller M, Starr JR, Heike C, Wolfram-Aduan AM, King D, Cunningham ML. Pediatrics. 2010 Mar;125(3):e537-42. Epub 2010 Feb 15. (2) Pediatrics. 2000 Feb;105(2):E26. Long-term developmental outcomes in patients with deformational plagiocephaly. Miller RI, Clarren SK.

Our experienced team of Chiropractors at CHILDREN’S SUNSHINE CHIROPRACTIC see infants with this condition on a weekly basis. We feel very confident in managing flat head syndrome. You can feel sure that your baby is in the right place for the safe and effective management of their flat head.

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MAR/APR 2016

[BABIES]

ALL THAT ARTWORK Kids love creating new things, and as parents we love seeing their creations. The things your child is drawing, painting, writing or making give you little insights into what is going through their minds, how they interpret the world and the things they are experiencing at that stage of their life. The only problem is, there’s so much of it! And where on earth can you possibly store it all?

WHILE BABY BOOKS HAVE BEEN AROUND FOREVER, MARKING THE DATES OF THE MILESTONES SUCH AS YOUR LITTLE ONE’S FIRST STEPS, FIRST WORD AND FIRST TOOTH, PARENTS ARE NOW FINDING NEW WAYS TO RECORD MEMORIES.

Kelly says she’s come up with a solution that works for her, which saves space while also allowing her to keep those memories alive. “I struggle to keep up with all the precious artworks, awards, stories and creations from kindy and school, because every week we seemed to have another piece of something come home that I need to store for each of the kids,” she says. “I have folders and boxes overflowing with 'stuff'. So I began taking photos of each piece individually and compiling them into photo books, one for each child for each year of school. It’s kind of like a virtual scrapbook.” This is another way to keep hold of those important memories, and you needn’t throw out everything, but instead choose some of your favourites or things that are special to your child to keep forever.

QUESTION TIME Your child probably asks lots and lots of questions of you, and it could be time for a little revenge. This is your chance to flip the roles of questioner and replier on their heads and be the quiz master yourself, if only for a short period of time. Mum of three Amy says she asks each of her children an annual series of questions on their birthday. “I ask them the same 20 questions each year,” she says, “which include things like their favourite food, best friend and favourite sport.” Comparing the answers each year will not only give you a little more knowledge of just how much your child has grown up, but it will also give them a snapshot of their lives to look back on. If this idea appeals to you, consider the questions you’d like to ask that will be meaningful as your child grows older. These can range from big things like their favourite hobby to questions that might gather some funny or insightful responses, such as how they would describe themselves at this moment.

KEEP A RECIPE BOOK There’s nothing that triggers memories quite like food, and mum of one Linda has a great idea for helping her daughter one day recall the tastes of her childhood. “I keep a recipe book of all my daughter’s favourite foods at different ages,” she says. “I think there’ll be something comforting about cooking her favourite childhood dishes when she’s older, and it might take her back in time a bit.” To recreate this idea, use either a folder with plastic sleeves to put in printed out recipes or a dedicated book to write them in – after all, seeing your handwritten details of the foods they loved during childhood could be special to your child one day, too. Then set a reminder for yourself to add to the book every so often: adding to the book even three or four times a year will give them a great collection of favourites to look back on.

MAR/APR 2016

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MAR/APR 2016

[BABIES]

THE POWER OF SOCIAL MEDIA

BLOGS AND EMAILS

Some parents use their Facebook accounts to help remember the little things their children are doing or saying. Mum of three Kelly explains, “My kids are always saying funny things and then when I’d go to recount the story to my husband, I would always forget something or lose something in translation. So I started recording the comments as Facebook statuses, so I could remember them later on.”

Blogging is a current big thing when we think of ways to record memories and tell stories, and there are thousands of parents doing just that. Some keep their blogs open for anyone to read and others set them to private for just their family, and this simply comes down to what details you’re sharing and what you feel comfortable with.

This idea has grown as Kelly realised she could utilise this record even further. “I can download the log from Facebook and record these quirky comments in a book that I bought called My Quotable Kid. I can now easily keep track of what the kids said and when they said it, working out how old they were based on the date I posted it on Facebook.” Mum of three Lucy has taken the idea of utilising social media for memories to a whole other level. She has started an account for each of her children and writes status updates based on the things her kids are doing. “I’ve tagged a gazillion photos of them, with status updates of stuff we've done or that they've enjoyed,” she says, adding that she likes how Facebook helps her record these moments chronologically. The kids will be given the passwords for their Facebook accounts when they are old enough, and it’s safe to say they’ll receive the surprise of their life when that time comes. Pages upon pages of memories, as well as details of their lives that they won’t even remember, will come flooding back to them. If you like the idea of recording your child’s life on social media, consider privacy as a priority. Set the privacy settings to high, and remember that technology like Facebook won’t be around forever so think about having a back up for all those special moments as well.

If you want to keep a blog of your child’s life or of your life as a parent, you can start with a free platform like blogger.com or wordpress.com. From there, it’s as easy as just starting to write stories or details of moments that you want to remember or would like your child to read one day. Other bloggers incorporate photos and sometimes use a challenge such as ‘Photo A Day’ (fatmumslim.com.au) or taking one photo a week of your child. Another way to use technology to communicate with your child’s future self is via email: a creative way to have one-sided conversations that they might just reply to one day. Amy has set up an email address for each of her children and sends them regular correspondence as she feels drawn to speaking with them. “I sporadically send them emails,” she says, adding that she does this both at times that are significant in their lives and times that are more ordinary. “One day they’ll open their inbox and see a lot of love and memories from their mum.”

For more information on babies.

DOWNLOAD OUR BABIES BABIES GUIDE Our guide to

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The pelvic floor controls your urinary, bowel and sexual functions yet these muscles are your most neglected. The new ‘Wave Brilliance’ Magnetic Pelvic Floor Stimulation chair (magnetic chair) uses magnetic fields to stimulate nerve impulses which rapidly flex and tighten your pelvic floor muscles. This is the equivalent of approximately 200 pelvic floor contractions every minute at 20 times greater the intensity than the patient can do themselves! It is the ideal way to kick start or regenerate the pelvic floor and surrounding muscles to restore strength, endurance and continence. Treatments are tailored to individual patients but a typical therapy program consists of two 20 minute treatments per week for eight weeks. Of course children are most welcome to attend with you and can simply sit and play whilst you undergo your treatment. For more information about the new Wave Brilliance magnetic chair treatment phone the Suncoast Women’s Centre on 5437 7244 or visit www.abc.net.au/playschool Suite 5, 5 Innovation Parkway, Birtinya (Kawana). Medicare rebates available.

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Restoring your confidence with bladder control Dr Petra Ladwig from Suncoast Women’s Centre understands the problems most women face after giving birth. One of the most embarrassing side effects is often incontinence which can occur due to weakened pelvic floor muscles. A lot of women simply put up with this as the natural course of being a woman after childbirth but this need not be the case. If addressed early these problems can be managed, improved and even cured by something as simple and painless as sitting in a chair, fully clothed for 20 minutes! The pelvic floor controls your urinary, bowel and sexual functions yet these muscles are your most neglected. The new ‘Wave Brilliance’ Magnetic Pelvic Floor Stimulation chair (magnetic chair) uses magnetic fields to stimulate nerve impulses which rapidly flex and tighten your pelvic floor muscles. This is the equivalent of approximately 200 pelvic floor contractions every minute at 20 times greater the intensity than the patient can do themselves! It is the ideal way to kick start or regenerate the pelvic floor and surrounding muscles to restore strength, endurance and continence. Treatments are tailored to individual patients but a typical therapy program consists of two 20 minute treatments per week for eight weeks. Of course children are most welcome to attend with you and can simply sit and play whilst you undergo your treatment.

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For more information about the new Wave Brilliance magnetic chair treatment phone the Suncoast Women’s Centre on 5437 7244 or visit Suite 5, 5 Innovation Parkway, Birtinya (Kawana). Medicare rebates available. kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

Suite 5 Sunshine Coast Surgical & Specialist Centre 5 Innovation Parkway, Birtinya Q 4575

Phone: 07 5437 7244 www.petraladwig.com

MAR/APR 2016

[PARENTING FILES]

STOP IT! RESPONDING TO ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE CHILDREN by JAMES MCMANIS BA PSYCH. (HONS). ASSOC. MAPS

RESPONDING TO A CHILD’S EMOTIONS IS STANDARD FARE FOR PARENTS, HOWEVER, ANGER IS THE ONE THAT POSES THE GREATEST CHALLENGE. MOSTLY, A CHILD’S ANGER IS PRETTY TYPICAL FRUSTRATION AND HANDLED WITH LITTLE DISRUPTION TO A FAMILY. TYPICAL ANGER IS A NATURAL AND HEALTHY ASPECT OF THE HUMAN CONDITION. TYPICAL ANGER HELPS US ASSERT OURSELVES, CHALLENGE OURSELVES AND PROTECT THOSE WE CARE ABOUT. TYPICAL ANGER DROVE THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT AND WOMEN’S SUFFRAGE. WHEN ANGER BECOMES A PROBLEM

MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT ANGER

Anger is a basic human emotion that ranges from mild annoyance through to intense rage. Anger is culturally universal in presentation, resulting in an increase in heart rate and blood pressure as a biological means to respond quickly to a threat. Today, anger remains common to the human race and is thought to have a genetic basis.

It is important to identify a number of common misconceptions about problem anger.

Problems arise when anger and tantrums interfere with daily life on a regular basis. This can be because the anger is very frequent or the anger is severe and harmful. These interferences may be minor or they may be major; either way, the regular interference is a sign that something requires addressing.

WHEN ANGER BECOMES PROBLEMATIC IS THE TIME WHEN MOST PARENTS FEEL THE NEED TO SEEK HELP.

• All anger is bad The emotion of anger drives many great human feats. Only 10% of typical anger leads to problem anger/aggression. • Aggressive children are just naughty and need to be punished Boundaries are essential, as are rules and consequences, but punishment is not effective for long-term behaviour change. • Anger is inherited There is considered to be a genetic component to anger, however family environment and modelling from adults and media has a significant effect on problem anger/aggression. • Angry children turn into angry adults This is not true. Most problem anger is a cover up for a skills deficiency in an effort to meet a need. Address the skill deficiency/need and the problem anger will dissipate. • Angry children just want attention Problem anger is a child’s solution to a problem they don’t have a better solution for. Attention and social interaction is one need we have as human beings, but there are others. We will discuss the functional approach to behaviour change when we talk about the ‘function’ of a behaviour.

MAR/APR 2016

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MAR/APR 2016

[PARENTING FILES]

THE EFFECT OF PROBLEM ANGER ON A FAMILY Misconceptions get in the way of clear solutions, as does the effect of stress and guilt that comes over a household when a child has a problem anger issue. It is common for parents of a child with problem anger to feel frustration, even resentment, guilt, sadness, stress, anxiety and even have panic attacks. A family starts to revolve around the person with the anger problem, which can lead the whole family toward isolation, fear and resentment.

CAUSES OF PROBLEM ANGER AT THE CORE OF BEHAVIOURAL PSYCHOLOGY IS THE NOTION THAT ALL HUMAN BEHAVIOUR HAS A HUMAN NEED DRIVING IT. IN OTHER WORDS, EVERY BEHAVIOUR MEETS A NEED, EVEN PROBLEM ANGER. Here is a brief dialogue as an example: Teacher: Okay, class, books out. Today we are going to do algebra. I have on the board a range of questions for you to complete before you go out to lunch. I need you to tell me what X equals in each case. Note: Little Johnny has a bit of a processing delay, not a big one, and is in all other respects quite smart. This just means it takes him a little longer to process instructions and what is said to him, but no one has picked this up yet. Little Johnny: I’m not doing it. This is rubbish! Note: Little Johnny finds it easier to get into trouble and get sent out of class than reveal to the class that he actually missed the teacher’s instructions due to his processing delay. He thinks it is better to look ‘cool’ than to look ‘dumb’. Teacher: Johnny, this is your first warning. Little Johnny: No way! (and Little Johnny storms out of class) Note: Little Johnny’s anxiety drops now as he has avoided the situation that would leave him looking dumb in front of the whole class. Now, everyone still tells him he is smart and has a lot of potential if only he would behave. Much better than everyone knowing he is dumb … at least that is what Little Johnny thinks. All everyone sees is Little Johnny’s anger. This is why we need to investigate what the function of the behaviour is, but how is this done? Basically, we are looking for patterns in behaviour.

MAR/APR 2016

If the behaviour we are trying to understand is problem anger, we need to do the following: • Define the behaviour – What does problem anger look like? We need to come up with a description of problem anger such that someone straight off the street could identify the behaviour if they saw it using only our description. This is important for parents, because it means everyone is looking at the same behaviour. • Measure the behaviour – How often does it happen? Where? When? Who is there? And what was occurring immediately before the problem anger and how was it responded to? Every time problem anger occurs, all of this information needs to be recorded. This is because you are looking for patterns. Is it a time of day? A task? A location? Or a person that sets off the problem anger. This process is beginning to give us hints about the function the behaviour serves. • Have a conversation with your child – Seek to understand what is going on for them. This is not giving a lecture; this is about listening. We want to invite the child to identify ‘why’ they escalate to problem anger, to share what goes on for them. This can expedite much of this process and can go a long way to calming things down.

FUNCTIONS OF BEHAVIOUR FOR A CHILD ARE MUCH THE SAME AS FOR AN ADULT. THEY HAVE NEEDS, WANTS AND DRIVES: HUNGER, THIRST, FATIGUE, FEAR, DESIRE FOR THINGS, AND THE TENDENCY TO AVOID THINGS THAT ARE SCARY OR AT WHICH WE FEAR FAILURE. As we saw with Little Johnny, getting into trouble can be preferable to failure. So, to change the problem anger that Little Johnny acts out in class we need to address his processing delay so that he understands the teacher's instructions and has a chance at being successful in class.

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[PARENTING FILES]

STRATEGIES TO MANAGE PROBLEM ANGER Once we have an idea of what need/function is driving the problem anger, we then need to implement some strategies to make a change. There are many strategies available to address problem anger.

THE RIGHT STRATEGY IS THE ONE THAT ADDRESSES THE UNDERLYING NEED/FUNCTION THAT IS DRIVING THE BEHAVIOUR. Sometimes identifying this strategy is straightforward and sometimes parents will require support and professional assistance to identify and implement the strategy. Nevertheless, we will go through a few basic strategies, and finish with some counterintuitive approaches. House Rules • It is important to clarify expectations. Have clear house rules that focus on the primary behaviours you want to change. • Have no more than three house rules, otherwise people won’t remember them. • Write the rules in the positive. ‘No running in the house’ does not tell someone what they are supposed to do. ‘We walk through the house’ makes it very clear what the expectation is. • Write up what occurs if the rules are broken, for example: If someone runs in the house, there will be one warning. If the running continues then they will have to sit out (time out) for five minutes to calm everything down. Once they are calm, we will have a chat about expectations, work out how to ‘fix’ or ‘make amends’ for a situation, and move on. Once we move on this incident won’t be raised again. • The purpose of house rules is the notion that nothing happens until everyone is calm. Then issues can be dealt with, fixed and let go. This is a teaching exercise primarily. Reward Strategies • Ensure you reward positive behaviours. It is almost impossible to effectively reward behaviour that results in a ‘do not’ or ‘no’ statement. It is much easier and much more effective to reward success. For example, receive a tick each time you use please or thank you, and 10 ticks equals… • Reward the strategies that develop the skills that will assist the child to meet the function/need under the problem anger, but in a healthier way that reduces the child’s need to use problem anger. • Remember to engineer success. Reward strategies have to be achievable. In the beginning, a reward should be able to be achieved with little effort from a child so they experience the joy of the success. From here, achieving the reward can be made progressively more challenging.

GETTING HELP For long-term help, talk to your GP and discuss a referral to a paediatrician, psychologist or child psychiatrist. It is important to understand that if you are afraid or being assaulted – even if it is your own child – you need to seek help. Help for children: Kids Helpline Contact: 1800 55 1800 (24hrs) Help for parents in crisis: Lifeline Contact: 13 11 14 (24hrs) Parentline Contact: 1300 30 1300 (8am–10pm)

Punishment • This is ineffective in the long term. In society we are taught punishment is the right way to respond to ‘bad behaviour’. Yet punishment of a child is more likely to be a product of a parent expressing their own frustration on a child, not trying to teach them a different way of handling a particular situation. • For children with problem anger, punishment generally results in greater anger. • When you smack a child you’re showing them that it’s okay to hit someone who isn’t doing what you want them to be doing. Be aware of what you are teaching with your actions. Relationship • The second goal, aside from managing problem anger, is to repair family discord with conversation and connection. Talk to each other – as a family and as a parent team.

REGULAR DISRUPTION TO DAY-TO-DAY LIFE MEANS IT IS TIME TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT TO MANAGE THE ANGER.

James McManis is a volunteer lifesaver, pilot and psychologist at All Abilities Child & Family Therapy Centre in Noosa and Gympie. All Abilities is a multidisciplinary clinic offering in-house psychology and occupational therapy, working with children and adolescents as well as their families/ carers to develop skills and facilitate positive change. All Abilities believes that all clients' needs are unique and individually important, and is committed to meeting those needs by offering individual programs tailored to individual needs. For more information visit www.allabilities.com.au

MAR/APR 2016

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Open Day April 17, 2016

12.30 TO 3.30PM FOUNDATION COLLEGE (PREP TO YEAR 2)

Specialist early childhood teachers support a strong focus on literacy, numeracy and problem solving. A warm, stimulating, nurturing environment founded on Christian values, featuring: • Strong parent partnerships • High levels of teacher aide support • A fostering of creativity and imagination

CONTACT Chris Henschke, College Registrar on 5436 7321 Woodlands Boulevard, Meridan Plains 4551

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372 Mons Road, Forest Glen Qld telephone +61 7 5445 4444 | email enquire@scgs.qld.edu.au web www.scgs.qld.edu.au A School of the Presbyterian and Methodist Schools Association

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MAR/APR 2016

[PARENTVILLE]

The battlefront by LUKE DENHAM

After every school day when you arrive home and finally get your exhausted children into the house there is always an awaiting battle: homework. Now there are some people who believe that homework is an affront and something that is grossly unfair. These people are usually children and parents who dread enforcing this antiquated regime. Whatever you believe, it is still there and it’s not going away in a hurry. So how do you get a child who has been up since 6am, running around all day and dealing with the myriad of issues that a school day presents and then some after-school activities to do their homework? They are truly exhausted. As are you! It is understandable that this is one of the day’s greatest challenges. Most of us crumble at this stage. Most children do too. We’re more than likely to get fractious and the reluctant child feeds off that and becomes more so. The cycle escalates and becomes a full-blown war as we become entirely unreasonable and start threatening things like no screen time, no dinner and straight to bed because we just want to see the back of them. Yet, if we can make homework an enjoyable routine then all this fades gently into the background. Sounds like a mad dream, doesn’t it? It’s not! It’s entirely possible but it takes belief from your core to pass this on to your children. They mimic and absorb your every mood and action. If you haughtily suggest that they do their homework, they will haughtily ignore you. If you sigh and tentatively suggest that perhaps they should do their homework, they will stare at you with such melancholy in their eyes that you can’t bear to enforce such a barbarous thing. The effort some children put into not doing homework is frankly amazing. The energy they and we waste avoiding this daily task should be bottled. So how do we change the whole perception of homework? Firstly, you as a parent have to be involved. I always wanted to know where my children were at with their schoolwork. Doing homework with them was an excellent opportunity to monitor their progress or lack thereof. It was a time of the day when they could show off or ask for your help. It was a time I could be their teacher. My children would sit at the table in the kitchen while I was preparing dinner. They would have their books out and we would start. It was a time to watch how they dealt with those sometimes difficult tasks such as – God forbid – fractions. The main focus here should be on them and giving them the opportunity to shine while showing genuine interest. In time, this routine becomes like brushing your teeth only a lot more enjoyable. But only if you truly enjoy it. They will know when you’re faking it. Children have uncanny ability to do that – they’re positively spooky when it comes to spotting a charlatan. Imagine a day when you arrive home and your children pull out their homework and start without having to be prompted. Imagine them and you actually working together and conversing about what they are working on. It sounds too good to be true, right? It’s not and it is entirely possible. All it takes is a real belief and interest in what they are doing. Real being the operative word. The battlefront dissolves and all of you can learn together. Homework becomes part of your day and most importantly, they get the opportunity to show you how good they are at something … and you get to smile proudly.

Brisbane dad Luke Denham is a single parent of two teenagers. Luke shares his parenting trials and triumphs at ‘The Collective Parent’, a blog he writes not just for single parents or fathers, but for all parents. Luke follows simple rules for bringing out the best in children so they can be peaceful, loving productive members of our society. Read more from Luke at www.thecollectiveparent.com and www.facebook.com/thecollectiveparent

MAR/APR 2016

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KINDY 2017 Register Of Interest

Program in the Noosa Hinterland? Noosa Christian College invites you to register your interest in enrolling your child* in a program which would offer the following features;

Experienced Teachers and Support Staff

Specialist facilities and programs for the early years

outcomes - in line with ‘The Early Years’ Learning Framework

A smooth transition beyond Kindy into Prep, Primary and Secondary years on

Building quality relationships through our NCC ‘Buddy Program’

An ideal learning environment with student gardens and animals on campus

A community of respect and care for one another

* Children must turn 4 years of age by June 30th, 2017. The Kindergarten Program would run 5 days a fortnight.

NOOSA CHRISTIAN COLLEGE: A Co-Educational College for Prep - Year 12 20 Cooroy-Belli Creek Rd COOROY 4563 P: 07 5447 7808 E: info@noosacc.qld.edu.au W: www.noosacc.qld.edu.au

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Putting the child first. kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

P: 07 5442 3807

MAR/APR 2016

[EDUCATION]

MODERNISING SCHOOL HOURS the great debate by JESSICA JANE SAMMUT

THE SCHOOL DAY IS INCONGRUENT TO THE TRADITIONAL WORKING DAY, BUT WHAT CAN BE DONE? SHOULD THE SCHOOL DAY BE LENGTHENED AND IS IT TIME THE SCHOOL SYSTEM WAS DRAGGED INTO THE 21ST CENTURY? You work. Your partner works. Your little one starts school. Suddenly, there is a problem. Who is going to take your child to school and who is going to collect them? You and your partner both need to be at work before the school day begins, and your workdays end after the school day finishes. It’s a conundrum that many of us go through, and it’s one that not only causes a complete re-jiggle of work commitments/the disposal of a career/the use of extra people in raising your child/the callingupon of after-school care facilities (if your school has them), but it’s also the cause of an immense amount of family stress. And for what? And why? Surely, in today’s modern society there is a better way? Or is there? “There really are no easy answers,” says Dr Justin Coulson, one of Australia’s leading parenting experts and author of 21 Days to a Happier Family. “Can young children cope with a longer day at school? Maybe. In relation to the number of hours a child should be learning… it depends. Is the learning stimulating? Or is it learning by rote? Are the children playing and excited? Or are they being controlled and drilled? If the learning is play-based and if the experience is developmentally appropriate, then of course they can cope. But there are costs to extending the school day without massively changing the way we think about education.” “Expanding the school day can however, in and of itself, potentially increase stress for children,” warns leading clinical

MAR/APR 2016

neuropsychologist Dr Ash Nayate who has been working with families for over 15 years. “It can reduce the opportunity they have to be at home with their family, reduce their motivation for learning and tire them out (bringing with it the associated behavioural issues that come from being fatigued). We see this happening in the US and in many Asian countries where the school day is extended. Children face increased performance pressure, and as a result, experience wellbeing difficulties.”

WHAT OTHER COUNTRIES DO So what do other countries do? With Finland possessing one of the most progressive and successful education systems in the world that values play, curiousity, autonomy and a well-funded egalitarian model (including an absence of standardised testing), do they experience a longer school day? Interestingly, no. In fact, you’ll find the average school day in Finland is only five hours long, with very little homework to complete at the end of the day. Conversely, Korean students are typically in school from 9am to 5pm (or 7:30am to 6pm for some adolescents), with huge amounts of study to be done afterwards and often additional classes to attend at night.

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St Andrewâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Anglican College

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5471 5555 www.saac.qld.edu.au

From the very first day, 2016 has been a year of great enlightenment as school captains, providing us with many opportunities to model core values of Unity College. Our captaincy has allowed the life and culture of the College to further develop through a deep connection to the student body whom we represent. We have worked hard to seek out many opportunties in order to give back to the community which has added such value to the lives of the students which is of primary importance to the ideals of student development. We aspire to lead our fellow students and Unity College collectively, through many successes over the remainder of 2016; encouraging each and every one of them to strive for Unity, Inspiration and Success and ultimately bringing them within reach of their full potential.

AN EARLY ADVANTAGE FOR YOUR CHILD Giving children a head start in life is now more important than ever. To inspire a love of learning from an early age, NCC early learners has developed a special curriculum for children as young as two and half years old.

COME AND SEE DAYS EVERY WEDNESDAY Join the fun of Come and See Days to learn more about NCC early learners. Your kids will love playing while you meet with the teachers. Visit the NCC early learners website to register or call (07) 5451 3330.

2.5 - 5 S YE AR With a p ic turesq ue setting, surroun de d by NCCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s w o rk in animals, g farm, blossom ing orch and veg ard etable g ardens (a soon to nd b e learn to swim due to o p o ol p en in M ay), NCC learners early delivers educatio in a play n ful, stim ulating setting.

www.nccearlylearners.com.au kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

MAR/APR 2016

[EDUCATION]

HOW CHILDREN LEARN To determine whether it might be possible to extend the school day therefore, the most important question of all has to be whether young children are actually able to cope with a longer day. “Young children learn through play, movement and human interaction,” explains Clare Crew, child development consultant and founder of Thrive Education and Wellness (www.thriveeducationandwellness.com.au). “Six hours a day in the classroom where the emphasis is on academics is plenty. If a mix of learning was available, there might be more scope for an extended day, but this would require an approach to teaching not often modelled or supported by our system. As it is, such little brains and bodies are not yet ready for the equivalent of an office working day, and we need to focus on what is best for children, not what is best for the workplace.” “The younger the child, the more play-based learning is crucial,” adds Dr Ash. “Kids need to be in unstructured environments so that they can learn creativity, problem solving skills and social skills amongst other things. A classroom setting is highly structured (lots of rules and regulations) and therefore doesn't confer the same benefits as outdoor unstructured play. In my opinion, therefore, a longer school day should be avoided. The issue isn't so much whether kids can ‘cope’ (humans are pretty resilient!) – it's about what's best for their learning. Spending almost their entire waking hours in school, largely in structured settings, is NOT an optimal learning environment for kids. In many cases, children need to do LESS in order to enjoy more ... and ironically, they end up learning more in the long run – because whatever they are learning tends to stick around. We want to educate children to be great thinkers (rather than simply great test-takers). As Albert Einstein said, ‘Play is the highest form of study’.”

“THE MIND IS NOT A VESSEL TO BE FILLED, BUT A FIRE TO BE KINDLED.” ~ PLUTARCH THE EFFECT OF STRESS So, if we are ensuring that our children are looked after from a learning and development standpoint, what about the effect of the long-term stress on families who find it tough to adhere to school commitments, struggling consistently to meet the conflicting demands of their child’s day and their working day? Surely this has a knock-on effect on children, not to mention parents? “Yes. Chronic stress impacts on our immune system and makes us more susceptible to illness (there is a whole field of study called psychoneuroimmunology dedicated to this),” cautions Dr Ash. “It can also leave adults and children more susceptible to anxiety, depression, substance abuse (eg. alcohol), disordered eating and sleep disturbances, and we're more likely to perceive the world as negative or hostile. In addition to this, our brains often don't function as well when we're stressed, we have trouble thinking clearly and we're more impulsive in words and actions. We can also be irritable or grumpy, which can affect the way we relate and respond to others.” The importance of dealing with this issue and finding that balance between the needs of the school/work day cannot be underestimated therefore.

MAR/APR 2016

EXTENDING THE SCHOOL DAY

THE PROS 1. Increased education enrichment: “Many young children are currently attending after-school care several days a week already,” says Jenny Atkinson, primary school teacher of 30 years experience and an education transition specialist and founder of Sparks Education Australia (www.sparkseducation.com.au). “Whilst they are well taken care of, extended hours in school would give them opportunity for more educational instruction.” 2. Short-term parental/work benefits: By extending the school day, parents can meet the demands of their work, confining their jobs to their workplace, not having to bring work home and squeeze it around family life which can be very stressful. The home also becomes a ‘sacred’ place of family engagement. 3. Happier parents who are able to fulfil their career potential: A longer school day will allow parents to continue on their chosen career path without the frustration of trying to fit it around the school day, modelling fulfilment and ambition to their children. Happier parents = a happier family unit".

THE CONS 1. Strain on teachers: If teachers do not get time to adequately prepare for lessons, then any gains achieved as the result of extended time in school can be lost through an overworked, stressed or less-prepared teaching body.   2. Less play: If young children lose their free time after school, where will they have time in the day to explore, play or be creative in ways that they choose? “Not enough ‘downtime’ can lead to overstressed children, which is counterproductive to learning,” warns Jenny. 3. More stress: “Children who are overworked and overtired (and overstressed) are more prone to illness, irritability and mood swings,” reveals Dr Ash. “They are also more likely to engage in conflict (eg. with parents and siblings) and may be more likely to experience chronic feelings of anxiety or sadness. These long-term effects of stress can affect the entire family unit." 4. Less downtime/balance: A child who is at school for long periods of time is out of the family home and is not with his parent for the majority of the day. He therefore has less time to connect with his loved ones and less time to recharge for the next day of learning. 5. Greater fatigue: A child who is at school for too long can become worn out, and a worn-out child can regress academically. This is particularly prevalent for children in the younger years of school or for whom learning is challenging.

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10 YEARS

Experienced and passionate educators and caregivers Children are supported and nurtured to develop a strong sense of self Reinforced learning with Christian based values and principles Approved Kindergarten Program for children from 3 years of age

Come Explore with Us!

We encourage children to think, reason, question and experiment helping to build their learning foundations during the critical years of early childhood development

FOREST GLEN 372 Mons Rd Phone 07 5453 7077

ALEXANDRA HEADLAND 43-45 Okinja Rd Phone 07 5479 2222

An initiative of the

SUNSHINE COAST GRAMMAR SCHOOL

Email enquire@newleaf.qld.edu.au www.newleaf.qld.edu.au

A Service of the Presbyterian and Methodist Schools Association

IS YOUR CHILD GOING TO PREP NEXT YEAR?

Make sure you give them the right start with NCC NCC OFFERS Small classes with dedicated qualified teachers and full time teacher aide. STATE OF THE ART FACILITIES including a Health & Fitness Centre with gym and rock climbing wall, Trade Skills Centre, Restaurant, Bakery and Music Studios (to name a few).

CO N TAC T U N O W FO R S P ER SO N A A LI SE D TO U R O F TH E CO LL EG E 4 .5 - 6 C A M P U S Y

OUR SON HAS DEVELOPED A PASSION FOR LEARNING, THE TEACHERS ARE SUPPORTIVE AND THE ENVIRONMENT IS A PERFECT MIX OF ACADEMIC WORK WITH PLAYâ&#x20AC;?

E ARS

NAMBOUR CHRISTIAN COLLEGE 2 McKenzie Road Woombye QLD 4559 Phone: (07) 5451 3333 Email: enrolments@ncc.qld.edu.au www.ncc.qld.edu.au

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MAR/APR 2016

[EDUCATION]

WHAT YOU CAN YOU DO TO MAKE THE SCHOOL DAY EASIER ON YOURSELF Here are some ways you can make the school system work a little better for yourself: Collaborate with another family: Make an arrangement with another family to share school pick-ups/drop-offs – on one day one parent does school pick-up/homework time/dinner, and on another day the other parent returns the favour. Sign up to after-school activities: See what after-school classes are available at school that your little one might like to attend. Is there an art class or gym class that takes place at school which does not require your presence so you can collect your child later?

THE MIDDLE ROAD So where might the balance be? “Keeping the day as it is, to be in line with meeting children’s holistic development, ensuring ample places are available in quality before- and after-school care, and securing a greater flexibility from workplaces with regard to our most precious resource of the future, our children, is the way forward,” says Clare. “Let’s not replace wellbeing with convenience. In my mind, the crux of the issue is the workplace. We need more employers and companies to come on board, offering flexible working hours to parents. When there’s less of a work-life divide, most employees will feel supported and bring their best version of themselves to a job, which can only be better for all concerned in any event.”

Share the drop-offs/pick-ups with your partner: By doing this, you have automatically halved your ‘school hours vs. work hours’ issue. Consult with your employer: See if you can go flexi-time so that you can arrive/leave your job later, and perhaps make up for it once your kids have gone to sleep or your partner has arrived home to take over the child wrangling. Investigate any after-school care options: Many schools offer this service which allows children to play in a relaxed environment with their peers while you finish work. Many of these services are also subsidised by the government, making them often reasonably affordable.

WORD FROM A HEAD TEACHER “Society’s priorities should be focused on providing the best opportunities for our children, not on working. So, perhaps we would do well to ask: what’s best for children rather than what’s best for the workplace? Children could cope with a longer day, but what’s most important in a child’s development is forming a strong, positive relationship with an adult – ideally their parent.

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2016

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EDUCATION GUIDE

“In addition, many people don’t fully appreciate the amount of hours a good teacher puts into their day outside the classroom. Whilst most teach approximately 20 hours face-to-face, this doesn’t include at least another 30 hours preparation, marking, planning, extra-curricular activities and professional development. A good teacher’s workload is far bigger than what many people realise. “And finally, too often the question is phrased as ‘care’ vs. ‘work’, rather than pondering what is in the best educational interests of a child. At the end of the day, schools aren’t child-minding services. They exist to help educate young people in partnership with their family.” - Dr Paul Browning, Headmaster of St Paul’s School, North Brisbane

MAR/APR 2016

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READ MORE KIDS ON THE COAST / KIDS IN THE CITY

DOWNLOAD AT

www.kidsonthecoast.com.au www.kidsinthecity.com.au

Stay & Play at Little Learners Join us for a fun morning for parents and children

FREE EVENT! For children 2.5 years old to Kindergarten When: Every Friday Morning Time: 9:30am - 11:00am Where: Cnr Schubert & Kiel Mtn Rds, Woombye What to bring: Your own morning tea Come and meet us at Little Learners, each Friday morning we will have a fun theme with lots to do including: On the Farm, What floats?, In the Jungle, Bugs around us, Science Fun, Bush Adventure, Under the Ocean, Pirates and more! Bookings essential - fskinner@suncoastcc.qld.edu.au Or book online suncoastcc.qld.edu.au/stay-and-play/

www.suncoastcc.qld.edu.au

Open Day April 17, 2016

12.30 TO 3.30PM PACIFIC LUTHERAN EARLY LEARNING Specialist early childhood teachers and assistants inspire a love of learning in children. Creativity and confidence are nurtured as children explore the Queensland Kindergarten Guidelines. Pacific offers a kindergarten program within a long day care model for 3Â˝ and 4 year olds. CONTACT Chris Henschke, College Registrar on 5436 7321 Woodlands Boulevard, Meridan Plains 4551

www.pacificlutheran.qld.edu.au

SCAN to visit our website.

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MAR/APR 2016

[TEENS]

RITES OF PASSAGE FOR TEENS by KIM LAHEY

MOST 13-YEAR-OLDS STEER WELL CLEAR OF AN ANGRY BULL ANT. ADULTS TOO FOR THAT MATTER! SO WHO’D WEAR A GLOVE TEEMING WITH THEM? In some remote Amazonian villages, part of becoming an adult entails poking your hand into a glove swarming with the angry, stinging creatures. Enduring the pain in stints over a few months shows readiness for manhood. For eons, the village raised the child. In doing so, all indigenous communities on earth presented their teens with physical and mental challenges as an integral part of growing up. Village survival depended on mature minds, so they invested an incredible level of energy in these rite of passage events. And village wisdom was passed on through stories, knitting together the generations. Some traditional rites of passage are not so alien from the wild and woolly things teens do today in an attempt to earn the respect of their peers or in the name of thrill seeking. Think of base jumping, tattoos, piercings and high-speed sports. Then think (or try not to…) of land diving, a tradition in Vanuatu. Similar to bungee jumping, but done with vines not elastic chords, the aim is to reach as close to the ground as possible. Traditional societies conducted incredible rituals aimed at helping their teens find direction. But as they evolved at a time when life was so different, how relevant are they now?

MAR/APR 2016

BRAIN CHANGES The perception of self and others is a work in progress for young adults, and their brain is undergoing changes aplenty. During puberty, the brain goes through a remarkable level of reorganisation that is necessary for complex thinking. Studies monitoring the brainwaves of sleeping adolescents found significant changes occur in the brain as it prunes away neuronal connections to make the major transition from childhood to adulthood. Studies from the UC Davis Sleep Laboratory show that this extensive remodelling readies the brain for adult cognition and occurs between the ages of 12 and 16 ½ years. Dr Arne Rubinstein has 30 years’ experience as a doctor, with over 15 of those years specialising in adolescent health. “I firmly believe that the issue is not that our teenagers have a problem; the issue is the environment they are living in simply doesn’t work for so many of them,” Dr Rubinstein says. “I have spoken to hundreds of struggling teenagers who tell me they feel lost ... like they are living behind a mask,” he says. An RMIT University chart of the subjective wellbeing of Australians between the ages of 12 and 55 shows an enormous drop in wellbeing between the ages 12 and 16. Dr Rubinstein explains

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[TEENS]

this is also a time when we see an increase in diagnosis of mental health issues and risk-taking behaviour. Self esteem and feeling okay about who they are is so important for teens. So how can we steer young adults through this dip so they feel good about themselves and make better life choices? Wishy-washy does not work, says Mike McCormick, author of ManQuest: Leading Teenage Boys into Manhood. Teenagers need to be guided into adulthood, he says. “It needs to be an active and meaningful process because … getting the attention of today’s teenager in this digital age is no easy matter,” he says. “Somebody needs to challenge them, call them out, and help them make sense of things when they are prone to take the easy path or make the reckless choice.”

STOKING THE FIRE INSIDE We can create present-day experiences that challenge teens to think about what sort of people they are going to be and what childish behaviour they need to let go, and provide the public acknowledgement of their gifts and talents, explains Dr Rubinstein. “There are plenty of people who’ve come to the same conclusion.” “Helping young people grow up emotionally has largely been ignored for a long time. Sadly there are too many examples in our society of 45-year-old ‘boys’ and ‘girls’,” he says. Heading out into nature is a core part of contemporary rite of passage experiences, just like it was ‘back then’. Think of North Baffin Island where Inuit boys traditionally went out into the wilderness with their fathers to test their hunting skills and acclimatise to harsh Arctic weather. On the island today, girls and boys head away from the community to ‘out camps’, for traditional skills to be passed down and practised. The future meeting the past. Adventure is one of Mike McCormick’s five essentials for raising a teenage boy. “While they often appear lazy and disinterested, teenage boys yearn to be tested and pushed beyond the edge of their limits.” Boys enjoy a false sense of control thanks to life being so easily accessed by the touch of a phone, joystick or keystroke, he says. Extracurricular activities may teach valuable life lessons, but are all structured activities. Boys need to be taken out of their comfort zones and into the wild, he explains.

The second is the adventure aspect, the need to create challenges for teens so they don’t go out and create their own. “Whether it’s spending time out in the bush or going on a walk through the mountains, the key is to create a challenge,” notes Dr Rubinstein. The third ingredient – the place where he thinks we let our children down the most – is truly recognising that every one of our children is different and has unique qualities. We all want our kids to be accepted for who they are and to have an authentic sense of self. “It’s our role as elders to help them find their spirit,” says Dr Rubinstein. “We need to tell them they don’t need to be like that person on the television or internet.”

EXPERIENCING THE SHIFT Mission trips, service projects, school exchange programs, challenging travel experiences, camping, hiking adventures, canoeing or surfing trips – a rite of passage can include any of these things. The catalyst for stepped-up responsibility for many teens is their first job. As part of the community service component for her Duke of Edinburgh’s Award, dad Jonathan explains how his daughter Phoebe volunteered at a local op shop on Saturdays from the age of 14. “I could see how it pushed her confidence, pushed her out of her comfort zone because she’d have to talk to and help so many different types of people.” Phoebe stayed on for six months after her Award hours were up because “she’d formed such a great bond with the ladies who ran the shop,” he says. The outdoor challenge component of Phoebe’s ‘Dukes’ Award was co-ordinated through her school with a week away in the bush camping, abseiling, bushwalking and biking. The teenagers in this family have also had some exhilarating, challenging travel adventures – not planned rites of passage as such, but when in tough situations out on the road the adult-child relationship tends to dissolve. Everyone becomes fellow travellers who have to pitch in to make the trip work, from asking strangers for advice and finding places to stay to packing and carrying the gear. Without a doubt the best camaraderie emerges from the toughest times, like being out in the Indian desert on the back of a camel for five days in the middle of winter – the dry season – when it starts pouring with no let-up or shelter in sight.

There are three key ingredients of a meaningful rite of passage experience, Dr Rubinstein says. The first is offering boys and girls the chance to exchange their stories, including their greatest successes and failures, with a parent; “A real opportunity to have open conversations – to share dreams and visions,” he says.

“A SUCCESSFUL AND HAPPY ADOLESCENCE ENTAILS HUNDREDS OF CONVERSATIONS ABOUT WHAT MATTERS, WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU STAND FOR.” ~ STEVE BIDDULPH

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MAR/APR 2016

[TEENS]

“SOMEBODY NEEDS TO CHALLENGE THEM, CALL THEM OUT, AND HELP THEM MAKE SENSE OF THINGS WHEN THEY ARE PRONE TO TAKE THE EASY PATH OR MAKE THE RECKLESS CHOICE.” ~MIKE McCORMICK

Founding director of tech-success story RedBalloon, Naomi Simson, explains that both her son and daughter had a rite of passage year when they turned 14. She says while simply being present “worked a treat” when her children were small, life has changed. “Teenagers need our guidance and values, and they need us to listen,” she says. She believes if teens have a sense of purpose, stick at it and work toward something they believe in, they’ll be in a vastly different emotional space than just being happy. After Naomi’s children had their rite of passage year, they were told they were young adults and they would no longer be treated as children. They took responsibility for their finances, choice of school, education and courses, Naomi says. The rite of passage experience also triggered a specific change in parental language, which became more like coaching language. “We no longer would tell them what to do – we would ask them what they were doing,” she says. They would ask their kids to think about things like the impact on other people if they were late and to come up with their own ramifications for their actions. “The shift to asking also helped us listen and respect the choices they made,” she says. She describes it as a “massive step” in how they parented. They did not get it right all the time, but this formula helped guide them. Being a parent is a great job, but forever challenging, Naomi says. “There is no ‘I have got this sorted’ – they make their own choices.” The choices are so much clearer if teens know what makes them tick, if they can somehow step outside the hurly-burly of living to take a look at what kind of life they want to build. Just like the village once helped them do.

MAR/APR 2016

PRACTICAL TOOLS AND INFORMATION ABOUT RITE OF PASSAGE EXPERIENCES Powerhouse outdoor camps and programs www.powerhouseprograms.com.au Pathways Foundation community-based residential or bush camps www.pathwaysfoundation.com.au Outward Bound Australia outdoor education programs www.outwardbound.org.au The Duke of Edinburgh’s Award youth development program www.dukeofed.com.au Uplifting Australia CampOut with Kids program www.upliftingaustralia.org.au Fathering adventures camps and programs www.fatheringadventures.com.au Book – ManQuest: Leading Teenage Boys into Manhood, Mike McCormick Book – The Making of Men, Dr Arne Rubinstein Schools offer many community service and exchange opportunities as part of their curricular and extra-curricular activities, including The Duke of Edinburgh’s Award and Outward Bound Australia programs.

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EASTER IS HERE

HOP TO IT! HOP IN TO FIND ALL YOUR EASTER TREATS & THE EASTER BUNNY TOO! The Easter Bunny will be roaming the centre at the following times: Monday 21 to Thursday 24 March and Easter Saturday 26 March from 11am to 2pm daily.

Good Friday (25 March) CLOSED* Easter Saturday (26 March) 9am-5.30pm Easter Sunday (27 March) CLOSED* Easter Monday (28 March) 10.30am-4pm *Birch Carroll & Coyle Cinemas and some Riverwalk restaurants may trade extended hours. Please check with individual retailers for details.

Managed by

SUNSHINEPLAZA.COM |

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SUNSHINEPLAZA MAR/APR 2016

TALK Parents

How do you raise a wild child?

Parenting a ‘wild child’ can be amazing and tough in equal measure. So how do you do it?

Most adults secretly love the idea of being a ‘wild child’ – a carefree independent spirit railing against authority. However, parenting a ‘wild child’ is a whole different kettle of fish! So, what is the best way to parent a little one with a renegade streak? We asked our Parents Talk panel of mums:

ROBYNA MAY The Mummy and the Minx LISA BARTON-COLLINS Mrs BC’s House of Chaos I wouldn’t say my children are overly wild, but they do push the envelope. The boys in particular put the ‘boy’ in boisterous, which is certainly not to say my daughter is a delicate flower. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned as a parent is to let go of being a control freak and to delight in the quirky little spirited snowflake that each child is. Essentially, I set a few boundaries about safety, health and manners, and then let them get on with it. This can be a challenge, but if I let them have small wins, when I then have to say ‘No’ to something it has impact and is not so much of a drama. For example, dressing up as Puss in Boots every day for approximately eight months is fine, but attempting to stand up in the seat of a shopping trolley while your brother pushes you through the car park is not, even if your cape is awesome. Similarly, wearing a banana peel on your head during a drive home from the beach while you and your brother loudly speak ‘the language of fruit’ is acceptable also, but telling your brother that he is adopted is certainly not, even if it is true, which it isn’t. I am proud to say I have lived and survived through all of these moments. Sigh. Ultimately, I think the most important thing is not to break a child’s spirit.

I think we are all born wild – there is madness and genius coursing through every one of us. But then we are shaped and narrowed into the confines of what is considered ‘normal’ and are taught to behave in a certain ‘convenient’ way. There are some children who fight harder than others against such boundaries, whose sense of self and spirit are perhaps a little stronger than most. The triangles that don’t fit into the round holes are often inevitably labelled ‘difficult’, but when you think about it, childhood is the only place we really try to quash such qualities. In adulthood we celebrate those who challenge the status quo – the dreamers and the people who look beyond what has already been done. We revere the people who don’t accept the word ‘No’, and push through it, changing the way the world works. We recognise the need for creative rule breakers to move forward. So, maybe we shouldn’t be asking how to tame the wild ones, but conversely how we should be encouraging a wild streak in our kids, nurturing their curiosity, while at the same time promoting kindness and consideration. Perhaps it is about our tolerance as adults? It is taxing to be tested continuously, and to face the question of ‘Why?’. It is much easier on us as parents and teachers to look after kids who accept things on face value, and who don’t test or challenge what is around them. But, when we think about the kinds of adults we want to create, perhaps we should be promoting a bit of crazy, even if it makes us a little cray cray in the process!

LARA CAIN GRAY This Charming Mum Being the parent of THAT kid – the loud one, the naughty one, the one who’s off in their own world – is anything but a carefree existence. I have a child who is on the wild spectrum. She is never intentionally hurtful or destructive, but she is anxious and intelligent and highly-strung, all of which can manifest in some pretty wild behaviour. Every week is a struggle between allowing her to explore the world on her own terms and reining her in to conform to what other people expect. I’m never quite sure if I’m getting the balance right, but as long as she is respectful of others and not causing major harm or inconvenience, I try to stick by her and let her be her wild wonderful self. One day she will either be a free-spirited hippy living entirely off the grid or the prime minister! It could seriously go either way. Whatever she does though, I know she’ll do it with passion, and I don’t want to quash that incredible energy.

What do you think? Do you have a wild child at home? FOR MORE INSPIRATION AND ADVICE, CHECK OUT THE INTERESTING RESEARCH IN THESE ARTICLES ON OUR WEBSITE:

Born to be wild or mild or PARENTING: 5 ways to get your child to LISTEN! plus The key to a happy child

Look for Parents Talk topics @ www.kidsonthecoast.com.au/forum/parent-talk 48

MAR/APR 2016

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SUNGLASSES for your children when they get their eyes examined by a Looking Smart Optometrist.

 Free pair of sunglasses (Up to RRP $19.95) for each of your children when they have a bulk billed eye examination with a Looking Smart Optometrist. (Age limit up to 12 years old)

 Tests are fun for children

The test takes approximately 15 minutes

 All staff hold a current blue card  Looking Smart Optometrists bulk bill

all eye examinations provided the patient has a Medicare or DVA card

 Easy parking

Did you know... 30% of children have some type of eye condition that affects vision? In most cases if the eye condition is detected early enough, exercises can be given to avoid it developing into a vision problem at school. In some cases vision problems exhibit themselves in children who have short attention spans but often are undetected by the parents or carers. At Looking Smart Optometrists we recommend a vision test for every child who is 6 months of age or older. We bulk bill all eye tests so it costs you nothing to have it done, and you can feel secure that you are looking after your child’s eyesight.

Phone: 5439 7844 Between Coles and Woolworths at the Pelican Waters Shopping Village, Pelican Waters Blvd, Pelican Waters.

Email: info@lookingsmartoptometrists.com.au kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

www.LookingSmartOptometrists.com.au MAR/APR 2016 49

[WELLBEING]

KIDS in the

GARDEN by CATH MANUEL

MOST CHILDREN ARE NATURALLY DRAWN TO NATURE FROM AN EARLY AGE. THEY LOVE LOOKING AT BUGS, PICKING FLOWERS AND PLAYING IN THE DIRT. THIS IS DUE TO OUR CONNECTION WITH NATURE AND LIVING THINGS, AND IT MUST BE NURTURED AS CHILDREN GROW OLDER TO DEVELOP RESPECT AND CONNECTION FOR THE EARTH AND OTHERS. One of the best ways to connect with nature is through gardening. Gardening provides opportunities to learn, explore, stimulate senses and experience many of life’s lessons, which is perfect for children.

wonderful things that stimulate your child’s senses and have fun doing it, and you’ll create memories and an interest that will stay with them for years to come.

Encouraging an interest in gardening from a young age will instil a love for nature in children and develop an interest in how food is grown.

Another thing to consider is to not overwhelm children with too many rules or things for them to do, so my tip for gardening with kids is to keep it simple. Start with small, simple and fun activities that create interest without being a chore. Also ensure that there are positive outcomes in everything you do. Don’t set your kids up for failure or they are likely to not try it again.

The key to developing an interest is firstly to let children explore nature without too many boundaries – obviously considering safety at all times – allowing them to explore, touch, feel, smell, hear and even taste the delights found throughout the garden. Find

MAR/APR 2016

kidsonthecoast.com.au | kidsinthecity.com.au

[WELLBEING]

HERE ARE A FEW IDEAS FOR GETTING YOUR KIDS INTO THE GARDEN Start with something that already interests them. This could be picking pretty flowers, making mud pies, or picking food and eating it in the garden.

Keep in mind that kids have a short attention span, so give them up to 15 minutes doing an activity (depending on age) and when they start to wander off to something else let them go. They’ll usually find something else in the garden that grabs their attention – butterflies and other bugs usually do this!

Don’t freak out if they get dirty. Everything can be washed off and the experience is so much better when kids get their hands and feet in the dirt or on the grass (and they’ll actually build up their immune system by connecting with the earth). Always wash hands when you are finished. This sets up good hygiene habits with kids.

When planting into your garden try methods of sowing seeds into small pots or directly into the ground, and also planting seedlings (baby plants). This give your kids something to watch sprout from seed, but also gives them instant results when planting seedlings. Flowers, herbs and veggies can be grown in your garden from seeds and seedlings, so start to grow by both methods. Pick suitable weather to spend time outdoors. In the heat of summer, the late afternoon either just before or after dinner is a nice time for a garden wander. Overcast days are lovely in the garden, as are the cooler days to enjoy warm sunshine.

I f you’re planting seedlings or small plants during the warm months it’s best to do this late afternoon. In cooler months, the morning is fine for planting. Overcast or light rainy days are also good for planting.

Try sprouts or micro-greens for quick crops. Both methods can be grown indoors, or outside in morning sunshine for micro-greens. You eat the very small leaves once they have sprouted. As they’re packed with nutrients and flavour, you can add a small amount to lunches, salads and as a garnish on meals. Kids love to sprinkle little leaves around!

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MAR/APR 2016

[WELLBEING]

or older children, try setting up F a compost or worm system in the garden. This shows kids how to reduce waste, reuse food scraps to make healthy dirt and also simple ways for recycling. Growing a garden is also about learning to care for our world, and composting and worm systems are an easy way to get kids to consider ways to reduce our impact on the world.

I nclude activities that help your kids to learn new words and to read information about the plants. When planting seeds use small plastic labels as they’re perfect for writing plant names on. This encourages kids to read labels and seed packets and write down the names of the plants. Also include counting seeds and talking about different seed types and sizes. This creates great interest in all ages … including adults! Have a few gardening tools ready for them to use. Find lightweight tools for smaller children and regular tools for teenagers. Safety is super important when gardening with kids so always wear gloves, hats and enclosed shoes.

I f you’re growing food, make a list of five foods your family loves. I grow foods that I know my boys will pick and eat fresh or to put into lunchboxes. These are beans, strawberries, passionfruit, celery and blueberries. These are all easy to grow foods that most kids enjoy.

Try growing in creative containers – recycle old items to grow plants in such as old boots, buckets, wheelbarrows and bathtubs. Also recycle old toys like tip trucks, diggers or tubs and grow something bright in these – they’re perfect for succulents.

Think more about the experience and worry less about the outcome. As the old saying goes, ‘It’s all about the journey, not the destination’. This is so relevant when gardening with children. The gardening activity is of most benefit when the experience is enjoyed, not when worrying about the end result. You can always go back afterwards and fix things if needed. There are many ways of introducing your kids to gardening and once an interest in nature is ignited, it will last throughout their life. What an amazing gift to give our kids.

Cath Manuel is an organic gardening expert, lifestyle mentor, horticulturist and educator based on the Sunshine Coast. She has many years’ experience in the gardening industry and has a great passion for growing fresh, organic food and living a sustainable lifestyle. Find more information on Cath’s programs and services at www.soiltosupper.com and www.facebook.com/SoiltoSupper

MAR/APR 2016

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Healthy Nutritious morning tea, lunch and afternoon tea

Limited vacancies available

Join now, it’s

FREE!

• Excellence in early childhood education and care • Exceptional play based Early Learning Programs

14 DAY Sustainable Lifestyle Challenge

• Government Approved Kindergarten • Centres open 6.30am to 6.00pm

Do you have plans for a healthy and happy 2016? Join me for 14 days and take the challenge to make a difference to your life, your family and our world.

• Children from birth to school age

Each day you’ll receive a simple challenge to try, with tips and ideas to help you make changes to day-to-day life.

Beerwah 5494 0833

Aroona 5438 1414

Chancellor Pk 5476 9777

I’ll cover topics from self care, having an eco-home, enjoying healthy clean food and ways to help our world. Simple and small steps to make big changes!!

Brightwater 5493 9797

Get Started Now!

Improve Your Life, Help Our World

www.bellagrace.com.au

www.soiltosupper.com

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We are currently looking for people with patience, understanding and maturity to care for children in need. Our foster carers receive extensive training, have access to 24 hour support and work closely with our care team to make a difference in the lives of children and young people who need extra support. Our carers can be single or partnered, married or unmarried, with or without children, and/or same sex couples. Some have a background in health and caring professions. Some provide short-term care, while others are full-time foster carers.

BECOME A FOSTER CARER

If you can share a place in your heart and home we'd like to hear from you. P: 07 5457 4300 E: carers@lwb.org.au www.lwb.org.au/fostercare

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MAR/APR 2016

[MAKE & CREATE]

A DOZEN EGG-CELLENT WAYS TO USE UP YOUR

EASTER EGGS by PAM MOLNAR

A week before Easter, your children tried to convince you that they should EACH decorate a dozen Easter eggs. Feeling festive and knowing the eggs were on sale, you agreed, hoping you would find a way to incorporate them in your meals. Now that Easter has passed and you are still left with most of the eggs, your family has grown tired of egg salad sandwiches. Looking for fresh ideas? Check out these twelve simple recipes for using up your Easter eggs.

Put it in a salad. Dice up and sprinkle on a Caesar salad, quarter long ways for a nice addition to a Cobb salad or slice and add to a spinach salad with bacon and mushrooms.

Add eggs to the middle of your favourite meatloaf recipe. That’s how Mum did it!

Spread pesto on an English muffin and top with sliced eggs, bacon and tomatoes.

Try a spin on the devilled egg. Add bacon, hot sauce, diced ham, wasabi or exchange BBQ sauce for mustard in your normal recipe.

Create a Mexican breakfast pizza. Using a piece of flatbread as your crust, spread a layer of refried beans and top with spring onions, tomatoes, sliced eggs and sprinkle with grated Mozzarella. Serve cold as breakfast or an appetizer.

Toss together a side dish using sliced eggs, cooled red skin potatoes, dill, radishes, chickpeas and bacon. Dress with a creamy Italian dressing.

Serve up a batch of baked Scotch eggs. Remove sausage from the casing (Italian, turkey, apple and chicken) and wrap around a peeled egg drenched in flour. Dip sausage covered egg in raw egg and then roll in breadcrumbs. Place on a baking sheet and bake at 190 degrees for 30 to 40 minutes.

Mix into tuna salad. Combine one chopped egg for each can or packet of tuna. Mix in 2 to 3 tablespoons of mayonnaise or Greek yoghurt per egg/tuna combo. For an added crunch, add celery, onions or diced water chestnuts. Serve on bread or in a cored tomato.

Make egg calzones with refrigerated pizza dough. Roll out dough and fill with crumbled eggs, sautéed green capsicum and onions, cooked spicy sausage and jarred pizza sauce. Fold dough over to create calzone and seal edges with a fork. Bake as directed on the pizza dough package.

Serve your guests a devilled egg appetizer. Add all the ingredients of your normal devilled egg recipe (mayonnaise, mustard, eggs, onions, etc) to a food processor and blend until smooth. Add sliced jalapenos peppers to give it a little kick. Serve with raw veggies or spicy crackers.

Dish up egg salad with a twist. Instead of combining mayonnaise and yellow (American) mustard with your eggs, try using Greek yoghurt and avocados. Blend two avocados with six hard-boiled eggs and add enough yoghurt to give you the consistency you prefer. Serve in pitas or wraps.

Combine chopped, cooked shrimp or prawns with a half cup each of finely chopped red onion, green peppers and celery. Add two chopped eggs, coriander, Greek yoghurt (1/2 cup – ¾ cup) and a tablespoon of lime juice.

Pam Molnar is a freelance writer and mother of three. She loves to try new recipes and blogs about them at www.wineanddinewithus.wordpress.com.

MAR/APR 2016

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[FAMILY HEALTH]

LIFE ON THE AUTISM SPECTRUM by DR MARNIE CUMNER B.A.(PSYCH.), P.GRAD.DIP.PSYCH., D.PSYCH. (CLINICAL NEUROPSYCHOLOGY), MAPS, CCN

WHAT IS AUTISM SPECTRUM DISORDER?

WHAT DOES ASD LOOK LIKE IN EVERYDAY LIFE?

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a developmental disorder, emerging during a child’s early development. Children with ASD experience difficulty with social communication and show repetitive behaviours and fixated interests. Often parents notice their children are developing differently by the age of two or three years. However, some milder cases of ASD do not become clear until primary school, when the expectations for social interaction and communication increase.

Although no two children with ASD are the same, they do share certain challenges. All children with ASD have difficulty with social interaction and using language to communicate with others. For example, a child with ASD may not be interested in chatting or playing with other children. They may not take turns in conversation, but instead talk at length about their own interests. They may have trouble both understanding and using nonverbal communication, such as eye contact, tone of voice, gestures and facial expressions. They may take comments literally and have trouble understanding puns or sarcasm. Although social communication may not come naturally to children with ASD, they can learn the ‘rules’ of social interaction with appropriate education and support.

In 2013, the criteria for diagnosing ASD were changed. Previously there were separate diagnoses, such as Asperger’s Disorder and Autistic Disorder. Now, these diagnoses are captured under the umbrella term Autism Spectrum Disorder. The spectrum concept reflects how symptoms vary in intensity and frequency from one child to the next. When diagnosing ASD, health professionals rate the severity of symptoms based on how much they interfere with the child’s everyday life and how much support they need. Research into the cause of ASD has found that genetics and brain development play a role, though the exact answer remains a mystery. We do know that the brain of a child with ASD develops differently than a neurotypical child’s brain. We also know that ASD is not caused by something that a child’s parent does or does not do.

MAR/APR 2016

Children with ASD tend to have very particular and intense special interests. For example, some children love train statistics or geology, while others may collect certain things, like toy cars or bottle caps. These areas of special interest bring the child great joy and focus, and they tend to engage in and talk about them whenever possible. Children with ASD generally like to follow a set routine and can become upset when someone tidies their room, rearranges the furniture or takes a different route to the shops. They can

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[FAMILY HEALTH]

become very distressed by change, particularly if it is unexpected. Repetitive behaviours are common, such as flapping arms, flicking light switches or lining up favourite toys, and a child may use these behaviours to calm themselves down when feeling stressed or overwhelmed by things in their environment. For example, children with ASD can be very sensitive to sensory stimuli, such as loud noise, bright lights, food textures or the way things feel to touch.

STRENGTHS AND CHALLENGES IN THINKING SKILLS

WHY DIAGNOSE ASD? A correct diagnosis of ASD provides a context for understanding a child’s particular challenges. A thorough assessment by a psychologist or paediatrician will also highlight a child’s unique strengths and interests. This information can then be used to provide intervention and support that uses a child’s strengths to help ease their difficulties.

WHEN TO SEEK HELP

Children and young people with ASD often have particular patterns of strengths and difficulties in their thinking skills. They can have difficulty putting themselves in someone else’s shoes in order to understand how that person feels. This does not mean they lack empathy, which is a common misunderstanding about ASD. In fact, children with ASD are often extremely sensitive to others’ emotions. However, they can find it hard to understand the impact of their own comments on another person’s feelings. Children with ASD tend to focus on details, rather than looking at the big picture. This can make generalising learned skills to new situations difficult. However, this can also be a valuable skill – attending to the details that most of us overlook can lead to new innovations and understanding. People with ASD are often drawn to professions that require high levels of precision and may become engineers, scientists and technology experts. Although the difficulties associated with ASD receive a lot of attention, it is also important to investigate a child’s personal strengths and areas of interest. For example, children with ASD are often very good at learning information and may have encyclopaedic knowledge and incredible memory for certain topics. When focused on their area of special interest, children with ASD can show exceptional attention and motivation. School education programs can be tailored around these special interests to increase attention and motivation. The preference of children with ASD for routine and predictability may lead to an aptitude for mathematics and science, which rely on well-established rules and formulas. Visual skills are often an area of strength and can be used to help children with ASD to understand new information APRIL 2 ‘GO BLUE FOR AUTISM’ and follow classroom routines. Children with ASD also tend to be direct April is Autism Awareness month goblueforautism.com.au communicators and independent thinkers.

The following communication and behaviour ‘amber lights’ are often seen in children with ASD. Social communication amber lights include when a child: • does not respond to their name • does not smile spontaneously at loved ones • does not point out or show you things • does not use gesture and/or has reduced eye contact • has delayed language development • is not interested in other children • does not play pretend • does not understand one-step instructions, e.g. give me the ball. Behaviour amber lights include when a child: • strictly follow daily routines and is easily upset by change • focuses on parts of objects • h as intense areas of interest, e.g. biology, geology, space, statistics • displays unusual body movements, e.g. flapping, back-arching • is sensitive to sensory stimulation, e.g. loud noise, food textures, clothing • performs repetitive activities, e.g. flicking switches, folding paper. If you are concerned about your child, speak with your GP about obtaining a developmental assessment. You can also find an experienced psychologist in your local area on the ‘Autism Spectrum Disorder Practitioner List’ on the Australian Psychological Society website (www.psychology.org.au). Medicare rebates are available in some instances and your GP can help you negotiate the referral pathways. Funding may be available for early intervention services once a diagnosis of ASD has been made. The Raising Children Network website (www.raisingchildren.net.au) is an excellent source of information about ASD.

SOMETHING TO REMEMBER… Children with ASD have a different way of thinking and this can be wonderful, stressful, powerful and exhausting for them and their caregivers … sometimes all at once. A diagnosis of ASD does not change who a child is, but is instead a starting point for understanding more about a child and obtaining appropriate support and intervention. Marnie Cumner is a clinical neuropsychologist with specialised training in understanding how our brain function affects our everyday thinking and behaviour. Marnie sees children and adolescents with a wide range of presentations, including learning difficulties, ASD, ADHD, brain injury, social skill difficulties and anxiety. Marnie’s practice is located at Noosa Heads and she can be contacted by phone on (07) 5447 2144 and by email at marnie.cumner@gmail.com. For more details visit www.sunshinecoastneuropsychology.com

MAR/APR 2016

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