Kingdom Christian Magazine_ June 2018 Featuring Pastor Brian G. Timberlake

JUNE 2018

Christian Magazine

Appreciate the

process MINISTER DONNA PATRICK

CHECK YOUR EMOTIONS Evangelist Carmella Hill

TEEN

Corner Pastor Brian G. Timberlake A GODLY MAN

CONTENTS Pastor Brian G. Timberlake

ISSUE 30

JUNE 2018

16

COVER STORY

4

4 APPRECIATE THE PROCESS Donna Renay Patrick 6 FOUNDERS PAGE Pastors Greg & Sharina George 8 MARRIAGE, EQ & YOU PART 2 Elder RD Anderson-Bailey 10 THE EIGHT WONDER...

Leslie Elia, Financial Article 12 ARE YOU SINGLE Alia Worthy, Single & Saved 14 CHECK YOUR EMOTIONS Angela Mosley, Physical Health

16 COVER STORY

Pastor Brian G. Timberlake “A Godly Man” 18 YOUR REAL OPPONENT Bishop Clarence Pope, Men to Men

Minister Donna Renay Patrick

10

20 WHY AM I SO STRESSED OUT? Evang. Carmella Hill, Mental Health 22 DADDY ISSUES Brianna Triplett, Precious Oill

LESLIE ELIA

26

24 MOTHER Ruth C. Dept, Poetry Corner 26 TEEN CORNER Taylor Hauser & Archi Alexander

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TAYLOR HAUSER

KingdomChristianMagazine

Minister Donna Renay Patrick

APPRECIATE

The Process It Won’t Kill You!

“Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible.” Dr. George C. Fraser

Waiting is one of the hardest things of unexplained silence from God. In this for Christians to do. Yes, we live by the context, Merriam-Webster’s definition of the Word of God, but as humans, we also live word “process” is: a natural phenomenon in a microwave society where the norm is marked by gradual changes that lead toward to want it NOW and expect it to manifest a particular result. When the Lord placed immediately. We complain about waiting, me in “the process” I had been relieved of being inconvenienced, plans being changed my corporate America job through a layoff. beyond our control, and having to pray I saw it as a blessing until the brook dried longer than 5 minutes. We make decisions up. But what I had failed to realize is I had without first checking in with Headquarters. gotten too comfortable in the perks of In our current world it is abnormal to pray corporate America - God had more. In His before choosing to act. But the Word of God sovereignty, and without my permission, He says when you courageously wait on Him, thrust me into the process to prepare me. I He will strengthen your heart (Psalm 27:14). thought God was mad at me, but the truth is A former Pastor of mine, Rev. L.C. Jones I trusted the paycheck more than I trusted often said, “Time spent waiting on God is Him. Let that soak in for a minute. God had never wasted time.” to make me very uncomfortable to be able to

You don’t hear too much about being see Him more clearly. in the “process” in terms of extended periods

When God places you in the process, He won’t discuss it with you. Here I was with no viable job prospects, unemployment benefits that had now capped out, and a mortgage company that didn’t care whether I was working or not. In the mean time I am taking care of my Mother (89 years of age at the time), maintaining two households (hers and mine), prescription purchases/ refills, a growing stack of rejection letters from potential employers, and facing a very uncertain financial future. But with all of my tears and frustration, God showed me that He was working on me. Remember our definition of “process” above: “. . .changes that lead toward a particular result.”

God was trying to show me that He alone is my Source – not a paycheck. A paycheck is a resource, but remember God MADE the check.

Does any of this describe you? Do you feel you are in a dark, unexplainable place in your life? Start to look past yourself and look to God. Being in the process will humble you to look deep inside yourself to discover new potential, new possibilities, fresh vision, and most importantly, fresh revelation. The process will reveal courage you didn’t know you had. If you find yourself in a period of inward spiritual pain, perhaps God has you in the process. Perhaps God is transitioning you to the next level of growth and blessing, and to do that He had to separate you from some things that had become your security; things that had made you too comfortable. In the process, God will shift your perspective. God has a higher level of leadership for you, but first, the process – it won’t kill you.

Donna Renay Patrick is a transformational speaker, award-winning author, musician/choir director, and worship leader. She has authored two devotionals focused on making worship a lifestyle, At All Times, and It’s In Your Praise. Recently, she co-authored a devotional for women in the workplace entitled, Be Refreshed. She often teaches in three areas where she is most passionate: The priority of worship, knowing your purpose, and effective leadership.

Visit her website at https://donnarenaypatrick.com. Follow her on social media: Facebook: Donna Renay Patrick, Author Twitter: @DonnaRPatrick Instagram: Donnarenaypatrick LinkedIn: Donna Renay Patrick, M.A.

CEO

Jesus

THE FOUNDERS

Publisher

Xcellence Publications

Founders

Pastor Greg George Pastor Sharina George

Chief Editor

Sharina George

Editor

Angela Wachsman

Graphic Designer Xcellence Marketing

Cover Photo Jeff Lawson

Contributing Writers

Donna R. Patrick RD Anderson-Bailey Leslie Elia Alia Worthy Angela Mosley Carmella Hill Clarence Pope Brianna Triplett Taylor Hauser Archi Alexander Ruth C. Dept

Genesis 1:28

Happy Father’s Day!!!

As we take the time to remember our fathers, we understand they are hard workers who take pride in taking care of their families. In this month several people are in several different situations, but this is the person God choose to be in our lives. Many times, our mothers get so much honor and praise that it’s a bit lopsided for our dads. Let’s take the time to really appreciate our father’s this father’s day.

God bless you, Pastors Greg & Sharina George

All rights are reserved and no part of this publication can be copied or reproduced without permission from Xcellence Publications LLC.

Let’s Pray!

Connect with

Minister Jucinta Jones on Fridays @ 5:00AM Est.

Exhortation & Intercessory

Prayer

218-486-2948 Access code: 82310# Email requests: Sanctifiedbychristministry@gmail.com www.sanctifiedbyChristministry.com

1 Thess 5:17 Pray without ceasing

MARRIAGE MATTERS

MARRIAGE, EQ & YOU PART 2 Elder RD Anderson-Bailey, MFT

“Emotionally Intelligent Couples are intimately familiar with each other’s world!”

-Dr. John Gottman

I

n this article, we will further explore Marriage EQ. The next two quadrants in the Marriage EQ grid are Self–Management (Behavioral Self-Control, Resilience & Integrity), and Relationship Management (Communication, Conflict Management and Bond-building).

In 1 Cor. 10:23 NLT Paul writes, ‘You say “I am allowed to do anything”-but not everything is good for you.’ ‘You say, “I am allowed to do anything.” –but not everything is beneficial.” It is imperative that you understand that Paul is teaching on Self-control you can’t have a high Marriage EQ if you can’t first master yourself! Marriage requires self-control in good times and in bad times. When you feel like it and when you don’t feel like it. Paul said yes you may be permitted to do anything but is it beneficial? Is it good for you? In marriage, there are many times when we are allowed to do something, have an emotion, express ourselves, react, and be justified in our desire to act upon those emotions but is it beneficial? Is it the best decision to make for the good of the marriage? Exercising Self-Control in a marriage is essential in creating a healthy relationship. You must be self-aware to know your boundaries and practice self-control so you don’t cross over your spouse’s boundaries. Self-Control is the willpower to say, in the thick of things, this may be allowed but it will destroy our marriage in the long run so I will refrain.

Practice Self-Control with little things such as, delaying purchasing an item you want in the moment and put it off for a couple of days. Do this with food, clothing, shoes, any item that is not super expensive but something of interest. See if you can actually delay it for 2 days to start.

Try increasing the length of delay to 3 days and so on. Doing this exercise will increase tolerance as well as build the skill to refrain from impulsivity.

Once you have mastered Self-Control by denying items, try using it in your relationship.

This skill takes a lot of practice but exercise refraining from speaking negatively for an entire week about your spouse’s actions. This may be more difficult if you sway more to the side of criticism. Just practice complimenting instead of criticizing your spouse. If laundry hasn’t been folded as you’ve asked try stating, “Honey I really appreciate that you did the laundry” and walk away. The self-control comes into play when you walk away because your normal reaction

would be to say next, “How come you didn’t fold the laundry and put it away…?

Gosh!!!!” Now the truth is that reaction may be justified because you did ask for the laundry to be done (which in most instances means to fold the items) but is it beneficial to start a fight over it? Trying this once may not create the new norm but I encourage you to keep trying it and over time watch how your relationship grows.

As we grow in our marriages, we will undoubtedly experience life’s twists, turns and burns. These experiences will at times test our resilience, our self-control and even our integrity. Maintaining a high Marriage EQ will require you to continue practicing exercising the skills of Self-Awareness, Other-Awareness, Self-Management and Relationship Management. Relationship Management is not how well you manage the other person in the relationship (awe man). It is, however, how well you leverage all of the other quadrants or EQ in this relationship.

It takes all of the other components to resolve conflict, communicate effectively and increase your bond. Meditate on the scripture 1Cor.10:23-24! GROW.LOVE. LEARN.

Marriage, EQ & You (Part 2)

By Eld. R. D. Anderson-Bailey, MFT

@RelationshipDecoder

@TheRelationshipDecoder

www.RelationshipDecoder.com

Leslie Elia Life Leadership

The EIGHTH Wonder of the World Do you remember History class where you learned the eight wonders of the world? They included such sights as the Great Pyramids of Giza, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon and so on. Well, Albert Einstein said that the Eighth Wonder of the World was compound interest! Those who understand this concept collect it, while those who don’t understand it pay it. Another way to bluntly put it, is to ask yourself if you have interest working for you or against you. Your monthly credit card statement and your monthly investment statements will quickly tell you which category you fall into.

In Chapter Ten of the Green Box book, you will begin to look at Principle 13 (Financially fit people do not ask if they can afford it but instead ask do they really want or need it) and Principle 14 (Financially fit people analyze their habits in order to break bad ones and create new ones).

One of the best analogies is that of a single snowflake. It goes seemingly unnoticed yet it is eventually, over time a single snowflake that can create an avalanche. Can it be the same way with financial decisions we make? One slip up here or there may not make much of a dent in your overall plan, but small mistakes lead to habit forming behaviors, which can have that snowball effect of making your financial dreams farther and farther away.

There will be times when you can, indeed, afford a purchase without a credit card and without a “90 days, same as cash” scam. When that time comes, your first temptation will be to go ahead and buy it. After all, you can afford it now,

Financial Article June 2018

The Magic Green Box right? Being able to afford and truly needing something are two different matters. Remember the 24-hour rule.

Wait at least 24 hours before making a purchase that is not an absolute need for your family. If the desire is still there and the purchase does not affect your financial freedom goals, then perhaps it is merited. But, if there is any doubt or you are not sure, then the answer is “no�.

Develop good habits.

There will always be another sale and another opportunity for a purchase. Time is of the essence when building wealth, so weigh those options carefully and let that compound interest work for you and not against you.

For more information about obtaining the Finance Kit that will aid you in your journey, please contact Leslie at ironleslie@sbcglobal.net or call 440-591-8750.

Are you Single?

A

re you single? Let’s take a few moments and think about that. Are you really single? Singleness is such a vital time in really learning to prepare and deal with the foundational work before getting married. It’s in our singleness that we learn what being single is truly about. Single in and of itself means to be whole, complete, and fulfilled in Christ.

What better time to be able to grow in wholeness and fulfillment than during our singleness. I believe that some wisdom comes from learning from the lives of others. Let’s look at Leah’s life.

Genesis 29: 31- 35 says, “When the LORD saw that Leah was unloved, He opened her womb; but Rachel was barren. So, Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben; for she said, ‘The LORD has surely looked on my affliction. Now, therefore, my husband will love me.’ Then she conceived again and bore a son, and said, ‘Because the LORD has heard that I am unloved, He has therefore given me this son also.’ And she called his name Simeon. She conceived again and bore a son, and said, ‘Now this time my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.’

Therefore, his name was called Levi. And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, ‘Now I will praise the LORD.’ Therefore, she called his name Judah.

Then she stopped bearing.’

If we’re not careful, we’ll eventually find ourselves, like Leah, going in continual cycles. We’ll constantly look for others, including future spouses, to fill voids that only God was created to fill. The danger in not being complete and whole before marriage is we end up going in marriage putting unrealistic expectations on spouses that only God can meet. Leah had found herself in a place of discontentment. Leah had constantly demanded love from everyone else without taking the time to love herself.

Until we’re able to truly identify with Christ and walk in the fact that we’re complete in Him and His love, we’ll constantly make withdrawals and demands of others without being able to deposit into others, including our relationships.

Alia Worthy

Alia Worthy

What you’re unwilling to confront in your singleness will expose itself in your marriage. Leah had become so focused on Jacob filling her void of being unloved that she had totally neglected the blessing of children. What fails to be resolved in singleness will find itself lingering in marriage and could potentially affect the marriage.

What if Leah had addressed these things during singleness?

In what areas do you find yourself incomplete? What patterns and cycles have you been able to identify during your singleness? It’s in your singleness that God really wants to break generational curses, heal your identity and you of any potential past wounds. In what areas do you need to be single, meaning whole and complete in Christ? It’s God’s will and desire that we not only know Him but would be aware of our fulfillment and completeness in Him. Leah finally understood that if she had never received the approval or love from others, she was already loved, valuable, cherished, and accepted by God. I pray that you continue to grow in complete fullness in Christ. that you’re able to continually give it.

How to Be Single?

1. Know who you are in Christ!

2. Connect with those who see your value.

3. Grow in experiencing God’s love.

Not satisfied with your weight Loss?

Try Checking Your Emotions

By Minister Angela Mosley

Believe it or not your emotions have a lot to do with losing weight.

Emotional eating can be defined as eating motivated by both positive and negative emotions. We eat when we are happy, sad, bored, angry, out of habit, and as a way to celebrate holiday and special occasions (or just because it’s Friday). Another example of emotional eating may include eating without hunger, eating during a stressful time, sneaking food so others won’t notice, and feeling a sense of emotional release while and after eating. Those that have experienced this cycle of dieting understand that the process of caloric restriction leads to a lapse in nutritional judgment leading to the feelings of shame, guilt, and despair, this leads to emotional eating. So how do you stop this cycle and not let your emotions hinder you from weight loss? or better yet, how do you begin to eat to live and not live to eat?

First, take a snap shot. Before any steps are taken to reduce or eliminate

emotional eating, it is helpful to understand what the current situation is first before plans are made to change. By keeping a record of when (and why) you eat during the day. Second, become aware of your feelings.

Once you are aware of the trends in your eating behavior, it is time to examine those feelings that may be standing in your way of weight loss and healthy eating. It is also important to note that emotions drive your behavior and provide you with the information we need to express what we need (or don’t need) from others. Third, acceptance is the hardest part.

Once you have outlined a pattern or relationship between our emotions and eating response, the hardest part may be moving towards accepting the feelings instead of pushing them down with food. We as humans are

“

This month I want to challenge you to spring back into shape. This means you have to incorporate new “Life Style” changes.

“

Minister Angela Mosley

good at avoiding negative feelings. We will find something to take our minds off of having to deal with them. The fact is, whether we deal now or later, we have to someday…..so why not now? Fourth, you have to practice relaxation exercises. Research has shown the many benefits of relaxation (a.k.a. stress management) exercises. From reduction of stress response, heart rate, and blood pressure to the strengthening of immune system function overtime, exercises such as mindfulness an deep breathing can make a huge difference to health. Fifth, you have to eat mindfully. The practice of mindfulness includes a focus on the present moment versus the past or future. It is all about being aware and giving the moment our undivided attention. Mindful eating is about being present and engaged with the eating process. As you sit down to a meal, note how the food is presented. Take the time to enjoy and appreciate every bite while eating slowly instead of racing to the finish line.

Lastly, you should seek support. Many times, we can make the small changes needed to reduce or eliminate our emotional eating habits which could turn into food addiction. It is important to understand that food addiction is becoming more understood and accepted as a serious mental illness as other substance abuse issues are. There are many psychologists and counselors within your communities that can provide the appropriate support you may need to treat food addition and learn to live free from emotional eating.

In closing, you can be victorious in managing your emotions by following

the above steps. Ephesians 3:20-21 (KJV) “ Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.”

June 2018 Cover Story

The importance of being a

godly man Pastor Brian G. Timberlake

The first thing comes to mind is Psalms 1:1-3, which says, “Blessed is the man Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, Nor stands in the path of sinners, Nor sits in the seat of the scornful; But his delight is in the law of the LORD, And in His law he meditates day and night. He shall be like a tree Planted by the rivers of water, That brings forth its fruit in its season, Whose leaf also shall not wither; And whatever he does shall prosper.” (NKJV)

Tabernacle of Worship The man is the head and as the head we must Cleveland, OH

make sure that our character matches our confession. Let’s be honest, being godly is not easy, especially when children are acting up, the marriage is rocky, and you are struggling financially. While trying to be that priest, prophet, and king in your home, will cause us to lose our minds, if we don’t have a well-balanced counsel, and lifestyle. As The scripture above states, if we follow those commands whatever man does, he shall prosper in the work he is doing. I know

a lot of brothers want to prosper in everything we put our hands to do. Even though the road is rough, and tough we still must maintain a godly lifestyle. Seeking Gods face, finding time to pray and meditate is important for a godly lifestyle.

We were created to be godly according to Genesis 1:27.

(ESV)“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God

he created him; male and female he created them.” I know it may be hard to imagine, but you were created to be in His likeness. The same power He has we have as well, if we are following his way and His will for our life. The question of the day I submit to you is, “is being a godly man important,” of course. Being godly is also having the resources to shift the atmosphere around us no matter what is going on.

It’s actually very important! We have too much to lose if we are not walking as Christ did. You may say to yourself, “I’m not perfect!” OK! Here’s my response to that, “For a righteous man may fall seven times And rise again, But the wicked shall fall by calamity,” according to Proverbs 24:16. (NKJV) I can go on for days but, as it states in the scripture. Yes, we will have some days that we may not seem godly, but we must remember that being a godly man is not being a perfect man. It’s being honest enough to admit when you are not perfect. So yes, it is important to be a godly man. Being a godly man gives you the ability to ride out the storms of life. Most of all it is very important for godly men to stick together and pray for one another, share our stories, inspire, motivate and encourage each other. So how important is it to be a godly man?

Well, let’s just say your life depends on it!

Tabernacle of Worship 10216 St. Clair Ave. Cleveland, OH 44105

Men to Men

Bishop Clarence Pope

Your REAL Opponent

“F

or we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places…”

As a citizen of God’s kingdom in this society, it is critical for

me to understand exactly what the scripture means to me in my walk with God and among men (humanity). We are called and anointed to be servant leaders.

Every man in the kingdom of God is called to lead in some capacity.

It is vital that we understand this above all else. As a man of God, I submit my will to God so that the course I’m on and all the results from my decision-making, I’m able to say that God is the source. I want to encourage our brothers everywhere to be mindful of who we REALLY are contending with in our day-to-day walk. We cannot be used effectively by God if we are distracted in our efforts. The people we encounter, the bosses, neighbors and family members we do life with are not our enemies. The ministers and church members that disappoint us are not the problem. Even the individuals that(seemingly) have been ordained unto ungodliness and have set themselves against us are not actually our real opponent. After understanding who our enemy is, we must understand what his devices or methods of operation are, what his characteristics are, and HOW he may come to be able to use them to undermine Gods’ plan for our lives. Our assignment is to convey Gods’ love to our world, to minister to others so they might develop in their relationship with God and fulfill their assignment in the earth. This is best done through example. That’s where Jesus comes into play. We are to take

His yoke upon ourselves and learn of Him. We are to follow

our leaders as they follow Him (His example). Our world (family, neighbors and co-workers, etc.,) should experience God’s qualities through interactions and encounters with us; His mercy, His patience (longsuffering), His compassion and most importantly His love... without condition. Being a man, these qualities are not always reflex. I sometimes must work at them a bit to really convey them according to God’s will and way. Some people can be challenging to love and extend these qualities to consistently.

Some just do NOT mean us well. Jesus had similar issues to deal with during His earthly walk and He prevailed. He KNEW that the adversary was behind the ill treatment He received, and He never fought back nor gave less than was expected of Him. In doing so, He brought many souls to salvation. Obeying the Father, no matter where it took Him or what it cost Him.

We are not of this world. We do not walk by its rules. We do not operate according to its principles. Fundamentally, in our walk of faith, we must believe that what God is calling, we can give to him. Man failed God through his will(disobedience). Man pleased God through His will (obedience). We can be who God wants us to be, who Christ died for us to be, men of God, godly leaders in our homes, and in our communities. We do not shrink from the opposition; we walk headlong into our destinies, knowing that is the will of God concerning us. God uses saved people to save people. Be that example of Christ in every arena of your life, knowing that adversity is part of the walk, but He always causes us to triumph! There is a Devil that opposes God and all who love and obey Him. He roams, seeking whom he may devour.

He will use ANYONE that will allow him to use them, ANYONE! Love everyone, hate sin. God saved the world with love and He is still doing so today. God bless

Bishop Clarence Pope Higher Hope Ministries 9114 Miles Park Ave. Cleveland, OH 44105

Pastorcpope@gmail.com

Mental Health CORNER Why am I so STRESSED OUT? We often here the phrases “I’m too blessed to be stressed…Don’t worry be happy!”

These are good catch phrases for a quick moment of relief. However, what happens when you don’t feel “blessed?” What happens when life hits you with a 1-2 punch in the gut and you are left breath and lifeless? What happens when the opposite of what you expect occurs? All of these things and more increases stress and worry, but why?

Stress or lack of prioritizing?

According to dictionary.com, one definition of stress is “the physical pressure, pull, or other force exerted on one thing by another; strain.” Chaos is defined as “a state of utter confusion or disorder; a total lack of organization or order.” Can you imagine being physically pulled in two opposing directions with the goal of going in one direction forward? Can you imagine trying to make sense out of a chaotic situation? This is quite distressing to think about and physically impossible to do without some degree of compromise.

Could it be that the basis for the stress and worry we experience is really a lack of having priorities? How so? Well, we often stress and worry about things that are 1) out of our control, 2) unable to be accomplished in the immediate future, and 3) require some thought and planning to handle. When things are out of our control in our surroundings, we try to psychologically gain control in our minds somehow.

However, the physical surroundings tend to impact our minds to the point of creating more psychological stress and worry. Psychological stress occurs

when we are trying to make sense of chaos. In trying to make sense of

chaos, we are required to put things in order. Therefore, it is believed that the basis of stress is a lack of prioritizing.

Evangelist Carmella Hill

Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor with supervising credentials (P.C.C.-S). & Founder of Empower to H.O.P.E. Services, LLC.

Don’t worry, be happy, right?

What makes the statement, “Don’t worry, be happy” easier said than done? It is believed that the basis of worry is fear. Fear creates anxiety and worry. What we worry about results in feeling sad, downcast, and even depressed. With these things occurring, who could be happy? When we find the source of our fears, the resulting emotion of worry or feeling troubled will decrease, if not, dissipate.

How to prioritize when everything is a priority?

We have all probably thought this, “everything is a priority.” However, this perspective misleads us to believe that we cannot prioritize everything so “just leave it all alone.” This result in feeling “stuck” and “trapped.” Consequently, we become immobilized where we will not do anything. When we are feeling “stuck” and “trapped,” we will not have the physical, mental or emotional energy to make any change. This causes the inevitable to happen – chaos!

Mental Health Tips: Prioritize what is important!

Guard against the mindset that “everything is a priority or important.” Start with making a list of what is important to deal with first. Then arrange other matters based on their degree of importance. Try this quick exercise: Write down a list of 9 roles that you play in your life. Take out 3 of the 9…then 3 of the 6…lastly, prioritize or rank the remaining 3 in order of importance (i.e., 1, 2, 3). Hopefully, you will realize that some things are not as much of a priority as you once thought.

Organization is key to decreasing stress!

We may think we are “multitasking” as we attempt to juggle many things. However, this only results in being unfocused and lacking clear direction.

Explore the source or basis of your fears!

Learning more about what immobilizes us and hinders movement in us would help decrease a sense of fear that results in worry and anxiety.

The conclusion of the matter It’s time to prioritize what is important in our lives and then arrange everything else accordingly. This will help us gain some sense of “control” and decrease chaos in our lives, thus, resulting in less stress and worry. What I don’t prioritize, will prioritize and control me! SELAH

DADDY ISSUES

By Brianna Triplett

I

The absence of a father figure has been associated with suicide rates in youth,

teenage pregnancy, drug abuse, high school dropouts, incarceration, and a variety of behavioral and mental health disorders in general that effect not only children but adults as well. As individuals when we lack something we tend to try to fill that void.

For the fatherless sometimes we try to fill the void of not having the physical and/or emotional presence of our biological fathers in a negative way, with addictions, idolatry, unhealthy relationships, and the list goes on.

As someone who did not have the consistent presence of a father figure growing up and did not meet my biological father until I was 24 years old I can honestly say that over the years I allowed the lack of a father figure to cause issues in forming my identity, to cause insecurity, a lack of trust and respect for male figures, feelings of rejection and abandonment and I found myself looking for a protector, provider, encourager, and leader in all the wrong places. Even after meeting

my biological father there were so many expectations that I had concerning the types of characteristics a father should have and the way he should speak and behave with his son(s) or daughter(s) that went unmet.

The “daddy issues” seemed to be worse after meeting him than before. Tension was created in our father/daughter dynamic, as I searched for something in my earthly father that I could only receive from my heavenly father.

The truth that I have discovered is this, Psalm 68:5 (NLT) says “God is a father to the fatherless...” we are created in his own image (Genesis 1:27) fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), the apple of his eye (Psalm 17:8). God delights in us (Zephaniah 3:17), and loves us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3), though mother and father abandon us, the Lord will hold us close (Psalm 27:10), the Lord will not leave us as orphans, (John 14:18), but has predestined us for adoption as sons and daughters (Ephesians 1:5). We

cannot be truly healed and forgive a debt we keep asking or desiring repayment on. We may never get that apology we feel we deserve. He may never be that father we want him to be, even if he steps up to the plate, we will never get back all the years that are lost. We have to let go, and let God. Let go of the depression and emptiness, anger, bitterness and mental exhaustion, connected to unmet expectations and allow our creator to step in and be that father figure we truly need. He can fill every void, he can mend any brokenness, and he can heal us of every emotional hurt.

Realize-what not having a father figure stole from you Retreat-With God in prayer and ask him to heal you and help you to forgive Release-Your father of the debt you feel that he owes you and release all of your

insecurities, feelings of rejection, abandonment, loneliness, and fears, to the Lord.

Receive- Love, Joy, Comfort, Strength, and Peace

Don’t allow, “Daddy Issues” to hold you back any longer from having healthy relationships, from being confident in who God created you to be, from having joy and peace of mind that surpasses all understanding or from feeling loved and accepted. You are wanted, your identity can be found in Jesus Christ. You have purpose, nothing will ever be able to separate you from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:39).

PRECIOUS OIL About Brianna Brianna Triplett currently resides in Lockport NY. Brianna has a master’s degree in Psychology and works as a Children’s Care Manager at Salvation Army. Brianna is a spoken word artist who is a part of Crossover Ministries and is a writer for Kingdom Christian Magazine and an active member of the Chapel at Crosspoint, a nondenominational church in Getzville, NY.

PoetryCORNER FATHERS A father is someone special, his voice gruff at times. He will say no more than yes, never enough times. Why doesn’t he have money when you need it? Does he have to always be so old-fashioned? Get with the times.

What you don’t see or hear at night: “Did I do the right thing? Will my job be there? Can I make enough for my children’s needs?” I only want the best for you, but at times you ask for the impossible.

If I am firm, you think I am mean.

A dad has a lonely job. Your dreams are very important to him, but might be impossible. So many ifs, so many whys. He must not show fear or worry, his tears he holds within. Some fathers never get a “Thank you” for a job well done. You only hear of unkind things. What would we do if we had to walk in their shoes for one day?

A dad can be a grandfather, a big brother, an uncle, someone that takes the time to show you love.

RUTH C. DEPT

T EEN

BE THE LIGHT

CORNER

As a teenager in any social situation there are always the never ending thoughts of “Will I fit in?” “What if I’m not wearing the coolest clothes or shoes” or “Will they make fun of me?” Well first off there will always be somebody out there who’s not going to like you for some odd reason, and it’s most likely because you have something that they don’t. Like for example once when I was in the fifth grade one of the girls who I had classes with said that she didn’t like me because she thought I was prettier than her! This was shocking to me because I had done nothing to bother her in the past, and I thought that we were such good friends before then. I feel

Taylor Hauser that a lot people are judged for having different things such as: clothes, shoes, hair, skin tones, and beliefs.

Growing up I went to a Christian school where everyone had the same thoughts about God, then I went to the public high school that I’m at now where people are very open about their opinions on the Lord, and it’s very hard to be open about my relationship with him.

For example I was taking a math test and my friend bumped her knee and then yelled “Ouch Jesus, Lord that hurt!” then my math teacher yelled back “JESUS DOESN’T EXIST, I’M AN ATHEIST AND IT’S ALL FAKE!” That was very stressful because I know he’s real but others don’t and that makes me so sad, but the Lord wants us to stand out and spread his word, even if you are the only one of your friends who is a Christian you can still spread the word of the Lord, he wants us to stand out and be confident in our relationship with him even if we get judged for it. In the bible when the followers of Jesus were getting prosecuted for following him a little girl came up to Peter and said “Hey aren’t you a follower of Jesus?” Peter was so frightened of the fact that he could be arrested that he said NO! The Lord wants us to do the exact opposite of what Peter did to him, he wants us to be the light and bring the light, and sometimes people don’t want to hear it and that’s okay because you put yourself out there for the Lord. So the last thing I’ll say is be confident in yourself no what, remember you are fearfully and wonderfully made by the literal king of the world!

TAYLOR HAUSER

TEEN POWER!

Ever been in a place where you’ve looked for a hand to help you up, and that hand is not there? Or looked for companion and attention of some kind, and no one’s around. Honey, let me tell you something: All you need is God. I want to encourage you to look to God for whatever it is that you’re seeking for. Because, at the end of the day he’s the only one who can solve any one of your problems.

Oftentimes, we as humans, not just teens tend to turn to our friends or loved ones for approval, permission, and/or council. We have to learn to come away from what people are telling us and focus our attention to what God is telling us. People tend to tell us what we want to hear, not what we need hear. Not to say that the council of your loved ones is a bad thing; but I want you to make sure that you approach every situation with wisdom and have good sense illn your process of applying what was said to you.

If God your focus?

One thing’s for certain: God will not tell you something that won’t do you any good in the long run. Wherever he leads you, you sure ought to follow his direction. Following people, there’s no telling where you’ll end up. Even the the ones who seem the most trustworthy can switch up if they really wanted to. That’s why having God is literally the best thing you could ever do. He’ll never change. By having him, I don’t mean just stating it verbally, I’m referring to the way you live. You must live according to the God’s word --- not people’s.

The road will get bumpy, the waves will rock you every which way, but you’ve got to learn to keep focus on God and know that it’s he who will get you both out and through.

People in your life, whom God has not placed there, could potentially further sink you into your situation. Be watchful of who you let come close; they could be a hindrance. Be wise in your council.

Yes,the going get rough. Yes, strong winds blow. Yes, the storm rages. But, you have the power to dictate the ending result --- choosing who you’ll turn to. I taught the youth a song written by my aunts that goes like, “Who can I turn to?

Who can I turn to? Jesus is the answer! He’s the only answer!” (“Who Can I Turn To?” Clark Sisters). So, I tell you, put your trust in God, rather than your confidence in man.

ARCHI ALEXANDER