LESSONS LEARNED: REFLECTIONS FROM A RETIRING LAWYER By: John Eldridge
STRESS Anyone who has ever practiced law knows stress all too well. Stress is almost another word for practicing law. It is everywhere! It’s in that list of phone calls that need to be made. It is in the rush to get to court on time. It is in the brief that is due tomorrow. In short, stress is that everyday feeling of too much to do and too little time to do it. I recall James A.H. Bell once saying, as the firm had taken several big cases in just a few days and another big case was coming in: “Promise them anything, just promise it tomorrow!” How do you deal with stress? There are healthy ways of dealing with stress and not so healthy ways. Exercise is a great way of de-stressing, as is deep breathing or meditation. Alcohol is a great de-stressor, but not a good one, for to reach that level of de-stressing you want will probably take an ever-increasing amount of alcohol. Nature is a wonderful de-stressor for me. And it does not have to be a day in the Smokies. Nature is all around to be enjoyed, whether it is simply being awed by a sunset, taking a short walk in a park, or just sitting and watching the birds. I never think about dealing with stress that I do not think of Lou, who at the time was a middleaged woman who waited tables with me at a local Hot Shoppes. My job in graduate school was as a part-time waiter, but hers was full-time, her occupation. When a
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restaurant gets super busy (and they do), orders get stolen by other waiters, waiters yell at the cooks and at each other. Lou would let it build to a crescendo, and then she would head to the breakroom and light a cigarette to take a break from the madness. I was never bold enough to leave my tables unattended for even the time it takes to smoke a cigarette, but I appreciated Lou’s approach to stress: let it go for a few minutes! Lawyers cannot be like Lou and just go sit on the sidelines for a breather. Typically, lawyers have to muster through because our clients depend on it. Yet “mustering through” creates its own level of stress. But we lawyers learn to live with stress and deal with it. I used to say practicing law was like keeping a bunch of balloons in the air, and then grabbing the one that is about to hit the ground. Push that balloon back up in the air and then grab the next one that is about to hit the ground. An attorney who is now retired once remarked: “I had grown so accustomed to stress in my life that I did not realize it until the stress was gone. Then I saw what stress I was under for the first time.” The practice of law and stress are irreconcilably joined. The goal is to find healthy and enjoyable ways of dealing with stress. Good Luck!
DICTA
May 2022
