Desperate Church Wives
Desperate Church Wives A collection of short essays for women in ministry
Karen R. Williams
Desperate Church Wives
Desperate Church Wives “Do you intend to rebuke my words and the speeches of a desperate one which are as wind.” Job 6:26 There have been many days when my desperation led me through circumstances that I wish I could have excused. My spirit was null and void and I couldn’t bare to worship or pray. I was serving in ministry faithfully, but still empty on the inside. We all have felt this way but dare to speak about the horror we feel for fear people think we are unfaithful. This book speaks for the millions of women in ministry who need to be vindicated, validated, and pushed into victory. Previously my heart would be upset with desperation, but today I’m glad for these moments in my life. Desperation has become the driving force that keeps me hungry for Him. Join me. Let’s be desperate together and wait patiently for His next move.
Desperate Church Wives
Introduction On many occasions watching the hit TV show Desperate Housewives I was simply amazed at how many issues the authors introduced to their audience. The show did a remarkable job presenting the struggles of women – betrayal, catastrophe, frustration, crisis, and weakness – along with their reactions to these circumstances. However, no suggestions were given for rectifying life’s dilemmas. Desperate Church Wives is my reflection of the many encounters of women who grace the church. It is obvious that we too have struggles to face, and it is time for us to discuss and resolve these daily challenges. While I know not all women are married to a man, we are all married to something, whether it be our church, children, job, or hobbies. I find the idea of Desperate Church Wives applicable to every woman in ministry. As you read these short essays you will encounter so much symbolism relevant to your own faith journey. The commonalities among women are so great in the church, yet we are so divided. One would think that our sense of struggle would bind us in a collective purpose towards a greater good, yet we are perplexed to find continued challenges that seem to hinder God’s Kingdom. This piece speaks to my passionate desire to witness to women regardless of race, color, or creed who transform the people around them. With that being said, I understand that transformation must first begin within us. The contents of these pages reflect some of my personal encounters as a pastor’s wife, but also serve to illustrate the struggles and challenges encountered by all women serving in ministry. I have chosen to be
Desperate Church Wives candid at times, while remaining dedicated to the single purpose of pushing you to become more for the Kingdom. Women in ministry make up almost 80 percent of the workers in the church. Kindly put, without us some ministries would absolutely collapse. That is neither to toot our horn nor to honor ourselves with praise but to suggest how women must be encouraged to take care of one another. It is my desire that healing, encouragement, and deliverance will manifest themselves and give each woman who reads this piece a greater sense of determination for God’s vineyard. With that in mind, take this journey with me. Enclosed within this booklet are note pages designed for your personal reflections. Please utilize this booklet in the morning as a jump start for your day, in the afternoon as a sustaining refresher, or in the evening as a replenishing fountain for your soul.
Desperate Church Wives
Desperate for Him
“My soul longeth, yea, even fainteth for the courts of the LORD: my heart and my flesh crieth out for the living God.” Psalm 84:2 “Fix your face” was what I was taught when I became a pastor’s wife. Constantly I was told to “fix your face” before facing the people. As First Lady I was never to allow others to see my hurt, pain, or anger, and I learned to fix my face for the sake of ministry. In my many attempts to encourage my sisters to do the same, however, I failed to equip them with the basic core sanity and the sustaining everlasting peace that helped me keep it all together. It was important that I kept moving from glory to glory and never subjected myself to a complacent state where the enemy could have a field day. In so doing, I learned how to go after God, how to long for Him, how to be so desperate for Him that I could not make a decision without Him. I remained determined to find new levels in my walk and in my relationships with others. I prayed for Godly wisdom, spiritual application, and an undefeated attitude to combat the enemy. Many women in ministry are hurting while smiling, crying while laughing, and experiencing quick glimpses of throwing in the towel. However, before you assume your position in a defeated cave, be careful not to escape into a state of altered desperation: a desire to go after distorted visions that satisfy your flesh and misrepresent God. Mighty women of God must get a handle on life pressures, home, family, and the accumulating demand of
Desperate Church Wives various ministry assignments. This unique position we constantly face often results in a tired, worried, and overstressed woman. If we intend to live a victorious life and walk triumphantly in God, then we must become desperate for God and allow the spirit of God coupled with the word of God to become the driving force which balances our lives. Women who become desperate for the things of God will begin to see their circumstances turn around because their desperation has moved them to another place in Him. Women who become desperate for Him leave those around them spellbound at how gracefully they came through their horrible ordeal. Now is the moment when our level of desperation aligns itself with those elements of God that propel us to our destined place in Him. There should be a spirit of phenomenal expectation of His presence. An expectation so great that it overshadows every frailty, every fault and limitation your mind can conceive of. These are desperate women who are not wasting time on minor church brawls but focus on redefining themselves in God. Kingdom‐minded women must become desperate for the things of God. We must yearn to dwell in His presence so we don’t allow the enemy to gain control of the outcome of our situations. The Word of God says “greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world.”
Desperate Church Wives
Desperate to Redefine Myself
“Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ” Philippians 1:6 Who am I, and where did I go? Is there someone calling me by name but I never respond because I have forgotten who I am? What happened to that strong, independent, vivacious woman who was known for her character and her intellectual ability to communicate a vision for her life and to prepare a strategic plan to ensure that vision would be accomplished? What happened to the sister who was on fire for God, excited about the spiritual direction of her life and prepared to become her sisters’ keeper? Where is she? These are questions we often feel but can’t find the answers to. Many sisters who attempt to balance life, work, ministry, marriage, and children find it challenging to keep their own personal dreams and aspirations alive. Every woman of God should always know her identity, capability, and vulnerability. My husband often tells people that “Karen had it going on before she met me” and in all honesty he is right. Not bragging by any means, but when I married my husband who was a pastor at the time, I did not become “Karen, the wife of Pastor David A. Williams,” I was still Karen who so happened to be married to Pastor David A. Williams. We have to be very careful, especially in ministry, not to lose our identity after connecting or aligning ourselves with others. Once you forget who you are you begin to take on the characteristics, the behaviors, and sometimes the
Desperate Church Wives mentality of others, which leaves no room for your own God‐ given purpose and vision. Many of us have been mentally confused by others who have tried to define us by our past, our mistakes or mishaps. However, when you redefine yourself you take back the power of the Word of God already declared over your life. The Word of God suggests that we are a royal priesthood, a peculiar people, a mouthpiece of God and a city that sits on a hill that cannot be hid. We are change agents for the Kingdom of God. We have to proclaim and speak into our own life what we shall become in spite of our present‐day conditions. Redefining yourself means writing down your desires and plans, and detailing a timeline and action plan. It’s amazing to me how we have mental lapse in ministry. While employed at an eight‐to‐ five job we have the capability to develop strategic plans, conduct meetings, coordinate projects, design marketing proposals, and project a style of professionalism that warrants awards. Saints in general have a hard time transferring their skills from secular to ministry. If God gave us skills and ability to perform excellence why do we not use it for the perfecting of the saints? No more excuses for you, my sister who has a desire to redefine who you are and work the plan God has for your life. Restore your dreams and aspirations, think again about what would give you fulfillment and make you the mighty woman God has called you to be. Don’t be afraid to step out on faith and cut some people loose so that you can advance spiritually, professionally, and personally. Today is a new day of direction, a new day of purpose and a newly defined destined‐minded woman.
Desperate Church Wives
NHP Production Upcoming Project!
The latest musical addition to the NHP Production roster is the release of Pleasant Ridge Live. The third live album over the progressive music ministry offering of Pastor David A. Williams is certain to help lead people into worship. With a constant desire to please God, Williams showcases the untapped vocal talent combined with some fresh voices which grant a wonderful musical melody. The album is set for three generations and breaks way for a mixture of engaging praise and worship. David Williams II (BD) is responsible for much the musical flavor. This young talented musician created most of the distinctive sound for this album with the assistance of Paul Whitley of Pablo Productions and Shon Carthen, PRC music ministry band leader. Keep your ear open for the new hot tunes, entitled “I’m a Seeker, Dwelling Place, and God Reigneth.” Pleasant Ridge Live is set to be released the fall of 2008.