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Woman wants to pay someone £2,000 to make all her decisions for an entire month
JEREMIA 10:12 Dit is die Here wat met Sy krag die aarde gemaak het, wat met Sy wysheid die wêreld gevestig het en met insig die hemel oopgesprei het. PAGE 2 Woman wants to pay someone £2,000 to make all her decisions for an entire month PAGE 3 Uit die Pen van Rika... PAGE 4 RECIPE: Flake Biscuits PAGE 7 Meet the man who has the largest collection of spreadsheets in the world
PAGE 10 DIY PAGE 16 Five benefits of being an early riser PAGE 18 Wat sê die Wet PAGE 22 Datums om te onthou PAGE 23 Emergency Numbers PAGE 24 • Tide Table • Public Holiday Calendar 2019
Woman wants to pay someone ÂŁ2,000 to make all her decisions for an entire month Courtney Pochin When it comes to making a decision, some people find it really easy to pick one thing out of several options. For others, it can be more of a challenge as they struggle with what the outcome of their choice may be. One woman has found making decisions so difficult she's currently on the look out for someone to take "control" of her life and make all her decisions for an entire month, just like in Black Mirror Bandersnatch. And she's willing to pay this person a pretty decent amount of money to do it. The unnamed woman from Bristol has shared an advert on Bark.com seeking help after having a particularly bad year. She wrote: "Hiya, bit of a weird one I know but basically, I feel like I need someone to make my decisions for me. "I've had a really rubbish year and would love for someone to take control of my life think of it a bit like a real-life Bandersnatch. "I have no idea if this sort of thing exists, but I came across clairvoyants when I was looking for another service, so I thought it was worth a shot." The woman went on to explain all of the terrible things that had happened to her lately, including losing money she loaned to a friend, getting stranded without money while backpacking in New Zealand, being abused by a former partner, and getting mugged after taking a shortcut home. She continued: "I am obviously completely incapable of making the right choices by myself. "My mum even jokes about it. It seems like every week some minor mishap will happen to me and I'm fed up." Claiming to be "quite spiritual" the woman admits she'd like to find a "clairvoyant or spiritual guide" that she can connect with for a month to help her get her life back on track. In order to do this, the person she 'hires' will need to help her decide things such as who to go on Tinder dates with and what she should spend her savings on. She added: "Basically I'd like the person to be on -call so they can help me whenever and with whatever I need. "I text a lot so they should be available to message me frequently and very quick to respond. "I'm really ready to try anything - and I've set aside ÂŁ2,000 for this from some inheritance money I received last year." If this sounds like the role for you visit Bark.com today to apply. 2
Ons staan vas soos die manne van ouds... vir 'n volle 3 dae, rug gebuig, voete van mekaar. Ons saag, ons sny, ons gesêls, lag en toe baklei ons! Sien, my anderhelfte het vir ons 'n bees gaan skiet, 'n Brahmaan, wat geen maniere wou leer nie, en al wat 'n werker is bestorm het, en al die ander beeste, wilder as die wildtuin gemaak het. Die ou vriend bel en vra of Jumbo wil kom skiet. Ek sê voor die tyd: "Jumps, asseblief, as die bees te groot is, los liewer, ons het nie meer so baie plek in die vrieskas nie". Die man belowe toe, en is daar weg… Genade tog… na so twee ure of meer, kom hy terug en my mond en moed sak tot laer as seespieël. Op daai bakkie is 2 yslike beeste, ek bedoel, yslike beeste. Ek draai net daar in my spore om en gaan maak vir my 'n koppie koffie. Alles lyk en ruik mos beter na 'n koffietjie… Skoorsoekend kom die man die kombuis in… en ek wag in so 'n ysige omhulsel vir 'n verduideliking. "Meid, ek moet nou eers bieg oor my foutjie". Heng toe kan jy my omtik met 'n veer… 'n Foutjie? Manne maak mos nie foute nie, en vir my ou man om te erken hy het 'n fout gemaak… Heng, hier kom 'n nuwe wêreld rekord. Sal hy toe bieg, dat hy met 'n staalpunt gaan skiet het... die Brahmaan mooi tussen die oë getref. Die koeël "ricochet" van die been af en tref 'n koei in die maag wat daar naby staan… Nodeloos om te sê, die man het toe "twee koeie met een skoot morsdood geskiet" en die betaling vir die "foutjie" moes toe uit ons vakansie fonds geskied… daaroor was die groot baklei. Ons maak mos maar almal "foutjies", party is net duurder en party se gevolge langer en seerder. Al wat die jare en sy grysheid my geleer het is, "vra so vinnig as moontlik vergifnis by die Here Jesus en by die persone betrokke. Dit maak jou vry en jou las ligter. My motto het verander, ek reis nou ligter… en is dit nie lekker nie! Mooi en veilige reis … Groete van huis tot huis… x Rika 3
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INGREDIENTS: • 250 g butter • 3/4 cup icing sugar • 2 Tablespoons cocoa • 1 egg • 3 cups of self raising flour • 2 flake chocolates • Baking chocolate METHOD: Cream butter and icing sugar until light and fluffy. Add egg and beat some more. Add cocoa powder and mix. Crumble 1 flake chocolate and add to the mixture. Finally add sifted self raising flour to form a soft dough. Roll into a large square block Use a fork and make lines . Cut either the size of a flake chocolate or half a flake chocolate. Bake at 180 ºC for 15 to 20 minutes. Once cool make lines by drizzling with melted chocolate and top with crumbled flake. Recipe and Photo: Yasmeen Ibrahim 4
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DARK CHOCOLATE Unknown Editor Fill up on these nutritious whole foods to nourish your body, stop pain, and ease painful inflammation. Dark chocolate. Yes, you read that correctly. Dark chocolate contains chemicals and anti-oxidants that help fight inflammation. According to a large Italian study, people who ate about one square of dark chocolate every three days had significantly lower measures of a protein associated with inflammation than those who ate no chocolate at all. At least 70 percent dark chocolate is best.
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By David Stubbings
To millions of people around the world a spreadsheet simply means Microsoft Excel, a vital tool on which they rely every day. But for one man, spreadsheets are the reason for his new Guinness World Records title as he now owns the Largest collection of physical spreadsheet software. Nowadays such programs are downloadable or online thanks to the likes of Microsoft Office or Google Sheets, but Ariel Fischman from Mexico City has spent years collecting various hard copies of previous generations with the total number adding up to 506. The corporate financial advisor started his quest after he began researching the history of a program which is now used on a daily basis. "I began using and collecting spreadsheets many years ago, and I realised no-one else had seriously attempted to collect as many spreadsheets as possible and simultaneously research the history of each item, which I have also done," says Ariel. His collection covers the 40year history of the spreadsheet, with hundreds of boxes and manuals containing examples dating back to the late 1970s when the first software was appearing. This includes programs produced by the likes of Microsoft (including early examples of Excel as well as its predecessor, Microsoft Multiplan), Apple and IBM but other lesser-known varieties by companies such as Boeing (the plane manufacturer) and the BBC. "Items worth noting are the beta versions of Excel, for instance, as they are evidence of the original efforts to produce the program that we now know, 33 years later, became the most widely-used productivity tool in the history of computing and business." So what's the formula to finding all these examples? In an interview with American business magazine, Fast Company, Ariel said he's bought a lot of items on eBay as well as contacting those who compiled magazine reviews of the software in the 1980s and '90s. He told Fast Company: "There are some that have cost me a lot of money. One person that I bought a few items from owns a lot of software from the first half of the '80s. "She has things I haven't been able to find anywhere else, and she's conscious of the imbalance between supply and demand. Not that the demand is so high, but even one person is demand, and that would be me. "I've paid close to four figures for some items." The collection now resides in his office at 414 Capital in Mexico City. 414 Capital's website also has photos of the entire collection, saying the company is "currently working on an ongoing historical review of the history of spreadsheets". 7
Claire Nowak Features you never knew about, shortcuts to see more of your favorite posts, and more. Unfriending isn’t your only option… Everyone has those few Facebook friends who posts are always annoying or argumentative or both. (I know—I can see them.) But if those friends are your real-life friends or relatives, unfriending them could cause some tumult in the real world. Here’s the solution: Click the “Following” button at the top of the page and select “Unfollow.” You’ll stop seeing their posts, you’ll still be “friends” with them, and their feelings don’t get hurt. Win-win!
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Thirty-six different people tried to escape from Alcatraz during its 29-year time as a federal prison. Most of them either died during the attempt or were caught. But in 1962, three criminals vanished from the prison. They made a raft out of stolen raincoats, left dummy heads in their beds Ferris Bueller-style, and escaped by climbing through a ventilator (according to the FBI investigation). While pieces of their raft were found, the three men themselves were not. The FBI turned the case over to the U.S. Marshals Service in 1979. The Marshals Service is technically still on the case, though its all but certain that the men are no longer still alive (even if they did survive their escape). 11
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WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE Kelsey Kloss Don’t trash this common ingredient quite yet—it has incredible lifespans. Worcestershire sauce: Like many wines, this sauce gets better with age. The flavor intensifies as the liquid evaporates. Worcestershire should last for up to 10 years unopened and two to three years opened if stored in a cool, dark place.
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Holly Stafford
HAPPINESS A large-scale genetics study recently conducted by Exeter University revealed that people who are “early birds” have greater levels of happiness and are at a lower risk of depression compared to those who are “night owls”. The authors speculated that this was because the “night owl” body clock conflicts with work patterns and school timetables, and this could have negative outcomes. PRODUCTIVITY Early risers are also better performers academically, according to a Texas University study. The study asked if the students were “morning” or “evening” people and it showed that “morning” people had a grade point average (GPA) a point higher than the evening types. The researcher’s explanation was simple: early birds get to their classes on time and drink less. REDUCING THE RISK OF BREAST CANCER In a 2018 study by the University of Bristol, researchers looked at 341 snippets of DNA that controlled whether someone was an early bird or night owl and showed that being a morning person reduced the likelihood of developing breast cancer. EXERCISE Post-menopausal women who exercise in the morning report a better night’s sleep. A report by scientists from the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle, found that participants who exercised for 45 minutes in the morning five days a week reported 70% better sleep than before the study. Researchers speculated that exercising early in the morning doesn’t interfere with the body clock. PERSONALITY A study of 346 German teenagers found that early birds scored higher for persistence and cooperation, while a further study from the University of Education Heidelberg of 1,231 participants found them to be more conscientious. Another study said that they procrastinated less. 16
Hana Hong Yes they’re mysterious little creatures and they can be pretty embarrassing during swimsuit season, but skin tags are mostly fine. Mostly. Skin tags are trouble: Skin tags, medically termed as acrochordons or fibroepithelial polyps (FEP), are just a tiny benign bit of flesh that is typically connected to the underlying skin by a thin stalk. Yeah, gross. On the exterior, they look like minuscule bits of “hanging” skin that are typically taller than wide. These growths are seen in approximately half of all people and can form for a variety of reasons. However, they turn up more often during pregnancy, in diabetics, obese individuals, and those that have a family history of skin tags. They are also more common as you age—and men and women suffer them at about the same rate. While they can turn up anywhere, skin tags tend to appear where there is frequent friction, such as the neck, breasts, groin, and underarms. Ultimately, there is no evidence that skin tags will lead to any serious skin condition: They’re mostly an aesthetic annoyance. Regardless, most dermatologists encourage you to have them checked out—and removed, if you want. The only link to danger is from one study from the Indian Journal of Dermatology, which suggested that skin tags may be a sign of underlying heart issues. You could get your heart checked out, but the one research connection shouldn’t concern anyone too much.
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Wat sê die Wet—Dave Viljoen 'n Probleem wat nou herhaaldelik kop uitsteek, is dat wanneer iemand 'n voertuig as voetstoots verkoop en net 'n gedeelte van die betaling ontvang het. Ongelukkig werk dit nie so nie. Daardie nuwe eienaar versuim om die uitstaande skuld te betaal, wat nou gaan lei tot 'n siviele saak wat baie duur is en jy bly verantwoordelik vir die uitstaande lisensie geld. Vul die verandering van eiendoms reg vorm in en nadat beide partye geteken het en die ID's of bestuurders lisensies aangeheg is, handig dit dadelik by Natis in. Voertuie kan nie meer goedsmoeds geskraap of gederegistreer word nie. Pas asseblief op vir hierdie slaggat 18
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Naming a baby boy after a computer keyboard symbol might seem like the wackiest example on this list, but these parents actually did have a valid reason. Somewhat. In China, people call this symbol “ai-ta,” which sounds very similar to a Chinese phrase meaning “love him.” Whether you think that’s cringe-worthy or kind of sweet, China’s ban on names containing symbols forbade it from sticking. 20
'n Gebed is nie soos 'n "SPAARWIEL" wat 'n mens slegs gebruik wanneer jy in die moeilikheid is nie; dit is jou "STUURWIEL" wat jou deur jou lewe lei en jou stuur op die regte pad. 21
2 FEBRUARIE 2 FEBRUARIE 9 FEBRUARIE 14 FEBRUARIE 22 FEBRUARIE 24 FEBRUARIE 24 FEBRUARIE 2 MAART 2 MAART 3 MAART 9 MAART 9 MAART 23-30 MAART 31 MAART 6 APRIL 6 APRIL 20 APRIL 28 APRIL 28 APRIL 3—4 MEI 4 MEI 4 MEI 26 MEI 1 JUNIE 8 JUNIE 8 JUNIE 29 JUNIE 30 JUNIE 30 JUNIE 27 JULIE 28 JULIE 3 AUGUSTUS 25 AUGUSTUS 29—31 AUGUSTUS 31 AUGUSTUS 29 SEPTEMBER 29 SEPTEMBER 26 OKTOBER 27 OKTOBER 2 NOVEMBER 30 NOVEMBER 30 NOVEMBER 1 DESEMBER 7 DESEMBER
BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 PLAASMARK Swakopmund—Villa Wiese—Tinkie Cornelissen—081 210 3222 OLD BREWERIES MARKET Windhoek—Hoek van Tal- & Garten Straat—dawn@windhoekcitymarket.com VALENTINE’S EVENING FESTIVAL Swakopmund—Cosdef Arts & Crafts Centre—064—406 122 KEETMANSHOOP STREET MARKET Keetmanshoop—Jooste Straat—Aina—081 847 1733 LAGOON PARK FAMILY MARKET (SUMMER VIBES) Walvisbaai GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 COSDEF ARTS & CRAFTS FESTIVAL Swakopmund—Cosdef Arts & Crafts Centre—064—406 122 BAZAAR Windhoek—Olympia Dog Club—Anuschka—081 128 2150 KUIERMARK Gobabis—Christa—081 291 4959 PIKKIE PARADYS Windhoek—Christene—081 429 6801 NLU AGRIBRAAI Windhoek—Hage Geingob Rugby Stadion—Bernice Doman—081 702 8161 GREEN CENTRE (EASTER MARKET Swakopmund—081 697 9072 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 KINDERFEES Walvisbaai—Jan Wilken Stadium—Sonja—081 312 4868 COSDEF ARTS & CRAFTS EASTER FESTIVAL Swakopmund—Cosdef Arts & Crafts Centre—064—406 122 LAGOON PARK FAMILY MARKET (SUMMER VIBES) Walvisbaai GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 OUTJO WILDSFEES Elzanne Koen—081 421 3042—elzannekoen@yahoo.com BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 COSDEF ARTS & CRAFTS FESTIVAL Swakopmund—Cosdef Arts & Crafts Centre—064—406 122 GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 KUIERMARK Gobabis—Christa—081 291 4959 DANKFEES Windhoek Wes Gemeente (Die Kerk by die Kruis) BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 LAGOON PARK FAMILY MARKET (SUMMER VIBES) Walvisbaai GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 WALVISBAAI OESTERFEES Walvisbaai—Len Nel—081 129 5367 GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 OMARURU ARTS FESTIVAL Omaruru—081 236 2951 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 LAGOON PARK FAMILY MARKET (SUMMER VIBES) Walvisbaai GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 KUIERMARK Gobabis—Christa—081 291 4959 GREEN CENTRE Swakopmund—081 697 9072 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766 GREEN CENTRE CHRISTMAS MARKET Swakopmund—081 697 9072 LAGOON PARK FAMILY MARKET (SUMMER VIBES) Walvisbaai BOEREMARK Windhoek Skougronde—Esme—081 277 8766
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NAMPOL TRAFFIC NUMBERS WALVIS BAY SWAKOPMUND HENTIES BAY KARIBIB OMARURU CITY POLICE
081 333 0449 081 202 8391 081 657 0704 081 711 9482 081 657 0703 061—302302
OTHER EMERGENCY NUMBERS LIFELINK NAMIBIA E-MED RESCUE PRO-MED RESCUE WINDHOEK STATE AMBULANCE SWAKOP STATE AMBULANCE WALVIS BAY STATE AMBULANCE
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085 900 081 924 085 933 061-2033282 064-4106000 064-216300
DATE 21 MARCH 19 APRIL 22 APRIL 1 MAY 4 MAY 25 MAY 30 MAY 26 AUGUST 10 DECEMBER 25 DECEMBER 26 DECEMBER
DAY THURSDAY FRIDAY MONDAY WEDNESDAY SATURDAY SATURDAY THURSDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY
HOLIDAY INDEPENDENCE DAY GOOD FRIDAY EASTER MONDAY WORKERS DAY CASSINGA DAY AFRICA DAY ASCENSION DAY HEROES DAY HUMAN RIGHTS DAY / WOMEN’S DAY CHRISTMAS DAY FAMILY DAY
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