Issue #18 Autumn 2006
Voices from Bristol’s Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Community
82 Colston Street, Bristol, BS1 5BB 0117 922 0741 info@bristol-lgb-forum.org.uk / www.bristol-lgb-forum.org.uk Registered Charity 1098085
Letter from the Editor… Contents
Hello, and welcome to this quarter’s edition of Outburst.
3 – News
A brief introduction: my name’s James and I’ve lived in Bristol for just over two years. During that time I’ve become an active member of Bristol’s LGB community, helping to organise last summer’s Fringe festival, the preliminary stages of Pride 2007, and I’ve just been given the privilege of editing this publication.
4 – Events 5 – Domestic Abuse in SameSex relationships 6 – LGBT History Month Identity, definition & new ideas
This quarter we look at the issue of domestic abuse in same sex relationships, the beginnings of a brand new Pride event for Bristol, substance abuse, and some thoughts around identity.
8 – Volunteers wanted: Substance Abuse Bristol Pride
I’ll shortly be putting together the next edition and I would encourage anyone who feels they can contribute to get in touch – contact details are at the top of this page.
9 – Listings
James ☺
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based, non-profit, community-driven Pride event. Although the two groups have fundamental differences in the way they see the future for Bristol’s LGBT community their main goal is the same – to increase the city’s gay profile and stage an event to be proud of. The new event is being mooted for August 18th, this time held in Castle Park, and everyone is encouraged to get involved.
NEWS…
First off, and looking forward, the opening date of Old Market’s super-club Flamingos has been put back until early February 2007. The club, in the building that used to house JustWins, has been beset by problems; this is the third time the launch date has been postponed. Word has it that there are several other A public meeting was held on November new pubs and bars due to open in Old 15th at the Council House to discuss Market within the next few months. plans and set up a management committee which will apply for charitable Come to Daddy, the popular club night status. This will give much-needed for bears, daddies, cubs and their transparency and hopefully ensure that admirers, is due to return to Bristol. One the backbiting which has marred the last of the city’s busiest nights for gay men, two Mardi Gras events will be avoided. organiser Mitch has been looking for an This will require a constitution, modelled alternative venue since the closure of on other successful Pride events, and the JustWins earlier this year. Come to election of trustees, a Chair, Secretary Daddy will debut at the Hatchet, in and Treasurer. No-one involved with the Frogmore Street, in January. The committee is allowed to benefit from the Hatchet has also seen the return of event. You can get involved by another busy club night in recent months, registering at the group’s website, this time one strictly for the girls: Club www.bristolpride.org GU, formerly Girls Unlimited. The fetish nights which also used JustWins, Deviant February is LGBT History Month, and the and HARD, recently re-launched on the Rainbow Group, Bristol City Council's first Sunday of the month at Castro’s group for LGB employees, is actively nightclub in Old Market. encouraging people to organise events during the month. Go to Two Bristol-based groups have come www.bristol-city.gov.uk/lgbthistorymonth together to try and forge a new, pinker for more details, or to add your event to future for the city. A fledgling committee the calendar. has been meeting to try and form Bristol’s first-ever official Pride festival Although it’s clearly not specifically a gay, and, at the same time, a second group lesbian or bisexual issue, World AIDS has set up in an attempt to galvanise the Day (December 1) is fast approaching, local community into action and organise and this seems the perfect time to remind a raft of gay and gay-friendly events ourselves that, although we now look under the auspicious title of the LGBT upon HIV/AIDS infection as treatable in Community Events Team. this country, millions of people around the world are still dying from this Last month the two groups met to insidious disease. discuss the possibilities of working together, uniting to produce a broad- In 2005 around 2.8 million people died 3
EVENTS…
from AIDS. It’s estimated that there are anything up to 46 million people living with HIV/AIDS worldwide, with approximately 4.1 million new infections last year alone. Saddest of all of these figures is that there are now around 12 million AIDS orphans in Africa. Now a couple from Bristol, James Anderson and Clare Hawtin, are helping with the development of a primary health care centre, aimed particularly at the support of those suffering from HIV/AIDS, by organising a charity gig and medical equipment campaign.
Free Conference: Domestic Abuse in Same Sex and Heterosexual Relationships December 4th from 10am – 4pm at Armada House, Telephone Avenue, Bristol. BS1 Speakers and contributors include: • Marianne Hester (University of Bristol) & Catherine Donovan (University of Sunderland) reporting on findings from the ESRC funded project comparing domestic abuse in same sex and heterosexual relationships
The concert, at Bristol’s Trinity Arts Centre on December 2, will feature stand up comics, poetry and live bands, including headliners the nine-piece funkdub brass outfit Smerins Anti-Social Club and, from Zimbabwe, African fusion band Batanai Marimba. All funds raised will go direct to the Tithandizane centre, serving some 70 villages and 20,000 people in the Kamuluza district of Eastern Zambia. They’re looking for help with things such as décor, lighting and sound engineering, and the couple are also asking people to help by sending medical supplies to the project: arnica cream, plasters, bandages, condoms, Bonjela, paracetamol and calendula cream amongst other items.
• John Dunworth, Lead on Domestic Violence (Home Office) • Linda Belmont & Brian Pixton (Crown Prosecution Service) • Jonathan Charlesworth (Educational Action Challenging Homophobia) • Workshops exploring implications of the research for practice
Anyone who would like to help out can contact clare@radiancehealing.co.uk
The conference has a maximum capacity Medical packets sent MUST be marked of 150 so places will be given on a first SMALL PARCEL and sent directly to come, first served basis. Tithandizane, Primary Health Care Project, Private Bag 4, Chipata, Zambia. Please email jennifer.sewell@sunderland.ac.uk or phone Jo Tyler on 0191 515 2218. Freelance writer Darryl W Bullock is the L&G editor of Venue Magazine, Bristol The research and conference has been and Bath’s weekly what’s on guide. funded by the ESRC (grant number RES000-23). 4
FEATURES… Domestic abuse same-sex relationships
heterosexual women and men, lesbians and gay men of different ages and ethnicity from across Britain, and interviews women and men who are lesbian, gay male bisexual, queer, and heterosexual. In conducting the survey we have included questions that allow us to undertake comparative work with surveys of heterosexual populations; reflect the differences we know occur within same sex relationships – for example the possible use of threats to ‘out’ people as a way of controlling their behaviours; and that allow us to make distinctions between different patterns of abuse – for example that may be the result of retaliation or self-defence. We have also asked about the impact of respondents’ experiences and their help seeking behaviours.
in
On December 4th in Bristol there will be a free one-day conference on Domestic Abuse in Same Sex and Heterosexual Relationships. This event will provide an opportunity for interested groups, organisations and individuals to hear and discuss the results of the first comprehensive study of domestic abuse in same sex relationships in Britain to date. There has been some reluctance from within LGB communities in Britain and elsewhere to acknowledge the existence of domestic violence in same sex relationships. There have been several reasons for this, including a justified wariness of providing ammunition to those who would use this knowledge as evidence of how ‘sick’ or unnatural nonheterosexuals are; and a belief that same sex relationships are equal and gender – therefore power- free. However, there is enough evidence anecdotally, professionally and increasingly from research for us to argue that domestic abuse in same sex relationships does exist and that we must investigate this issue and develop strategies for responding to it in ways that both respect and support victim/survivors and resist heterosexist assumptions about LGB relationships.
In the focus groups and interviews we have explored how people’s common sense understandings of love might allow people to tolerate abusive behaviours; and have explored with people their experiences of best and worst relationship experiences and their experiences of domestic abuse in order to explore what kinds of expectations people have of love and relationships and how they respond to being in abusive relationships. The findings from our research suggest that domestic abuse is a topic that individuals in same sex relationships are now wanting to discuss; and want to find solutions, help and support to tackle such behaviour and experiences. The survey was answered by 800 people – and within a very short space of time. Many of those responding had experienced some form of abusive behaviour from their partners. Of those who said they had experienced domestic abuse in a same sex relationship, most had sought help – usually from friends, relatives and/or by
Our research builds on that already done in Britain and America and is a multimethod study. We have conducted a national community survey of same sex relationships; focus groups with 5
attending counselling rather organisations or agencies.
Identity, definition & new ideas
than
We hope that our findings will make a contribution to debates both within LGB communities and organisations and the domestic violence practitioners’ networks - including the criminal justice system about developing best practice in relation to what is clearly a very real issue in same sex relationships. If you would like to conference, please see section below.
“The problem is that identity is more complex when there is freedom than it ever was when there was systematic legal humiliation.” – Simon Fanshawe I don’t pretend we’re there yet – there’s still so much to do in terms of shaping attitudes, banishing bigotry and prejudicial religious dogma, and finding not tolerance, but acceptance in all citizens. All that being true, our progress over the last decade, facilitated by a socially-progressive government, has been astounding, yet in terms of how we think about ourselves, we haven’t quite caught up. The 21st century conversation we are not yet (but should be) having is how our collective identity adapts to a radical new set of circumstances: burgeoning legal and social equality the like of which we’ve never seen.
attend the the Events
Catherine Donovan & Marianne Hester
FEBRUARY is LGBT HISTORY MONTH!
As I first began to become aware of my Block out your Blackberry, fill up fast-surfacing homosexuality, it became your filofax and spread the word! all-encompassing; my whole identity centred around it, albeit secretly. Of itself We are organising a range of this was not so strange – teenagers events, film showings and typically devote a disproportionate exhibitions to celebrate LGBT quantity of their mental energies to sex. Grappling with proscribed beliefs about History Month 2007. the ‘wrongness’ of being gay, coupled If you have any ideas, please with the resulting pain of secrecy, deepened me, forcing me to focus upon contact Tony Pitt on and develop aspects of my identity which 0117 922 2094 or email would not be there otherwise, but as I've rainbow@bristol-city.gov.uk come to terms with who I am, sexuality www.bristolhas gradually become less important, to city.gov.uk/lgbthistorymonth the point that my sexual orientation is now just one, perhaps not incidental, but certainly less significant, part of me. Why should anyone define themselves chiefly through their sexuality, unless sex was all that they were? Unquestionably, your 6
sexual orientation informs your identity and behaviour, but to what extent does it define the greater human whole? Different people will give different answers to this question but I suspect most would agree that to be human is to be more than a merely sexual entity.
generations to see right through the concept of difference, judging their peers by who – not what – they are. My perception is that we are not adapting fast enough; that to some extent we continue to present ourselves through outmoded stereotypes, perfectly good at subverting the power of a persecuting and intolerant society, but ill-suited to the relative open-mindedness of a forwardone which thinking 21st-century increasingly doesn’t give a damn if I happen to fancy men. We’re playing catch-up, dancing nervously around the lapping edges of this new wave of tolerance as if we no longer understand ourselves. I sometimes suspect that collectively, we don’t know how to be any other way, but we must find out, by having this debate.
Traditionally, LGB people, stigmatised as ‘other’ by a dominant heterosexual matrix, have found the most obvious route to identity has been through that ‘otherness’; we have been subtly coerced into defining ourselves through a straight view of our sexual difference. This historical oddity has fostered a culture which seems to find it startlingly easy to turn in on itself in an insular, almost protectionist way, and somewhat understandably so – the foundations of queer politics lie in subversion, which depends on exploiting the most obvious differences and therefore stereotypes of an alternative sexuality in order to increase visibility and political presence. The problem is that as we, through a stubborn refusal to hide ‘behind closed doors’, have begun to win the hardfought battle for equality, so the historical reasons for gay culture being the way it is (or indeed, there being a culture at all) are becoming less important. The onceburning need for a distinct ‘identity’ seems to me more disposable now than it was even ten years ago.
A gay identity which defines itself only through difference can no longer be the norm, even in a self-consciously ironic way. What we need is to be focusing similarities and common ground. As we slog slowly toward a new social paradigm of mass acceptance, what will come to matter is what binds us as human beings – not what makes us different – and how much more effective this focus will be in promoting and maintaining our interests than stubbornly clinging to outmoded stereotypes. There is little point trying to subvert the dwindling dominance of a society once it becomes largely acceptant of, and inhabited by, homosexuality at every level; our brave new world requires that we adapt. As we become equal, separatism and subversion become redundant. We need to find a new identity and some new forms of cultural expression.
With civil partnerships having become law in December 2005 and the (delayed) Equality Act anticipated by March 2007, gay people will have the same legal rights and responsibilities as straight. The legal framework gives us the authority we need to overcome the last bastions of psychological resistance in the minds of a straggling handful of bigots who have thus far refused to adjust to Our Being Here. A government progressively legislating in this way will teach coming
James Whale 7
Volunteers Wanted Lack of substance use treatment for LGB people
A couple of hours of your time might make a world of difference to another LGB person. Any money raised by offering these sessions will be used exclusively for the promotion of better local facilities for helping LGB people with substance use and mental health issues.
Patsy Staddon is a lesbian who was dependent on alcohol for 28 years. (She’s been well for 18). She has been doing research for some time into various aspects of women’s alcohol dependence and its treatment, for Avon and Wiltshire Mental Health Trust and the University of Plymouth. One of the many difficulties www.bristolpride.org encountered by women she interviewed was the lack of knowledge among those After several meetings involving offering treatment about the different interested people from all areas of the needs of lesbian and gay people. community, the loose collective of people aiming to organise Bristol Pride 2007 is In January, together with Jeff Walker, almost ready to formalise a working bisexual Director of Bristol Mind, and management committee. Once formed, Dennis Hughes, Bristol gay LGB this committee will aim to constitute counsellor, she spoke to treatment Bristol Pride as a registered charity providers in the area about the need for through the Charities Commission, the same sex services to be available, and unanimous feeling being that honesty, ideally of an LGB treatment centre. So far transparency and good practice are key the latter seems a distant prospect, but to delivering a broad, community-driven there is definite support from the funding pride event for Bristol. sources for the idea of training sessions offered by LGB people who have been The public consultation has already recovered from addiction for an begun online at appreciable time, who are open to a www.bristolpride.org/forum - this is an variety of treatment options, and who online message board where we would be prepared to talk with treatment encourage anyone who may be providers about our particular issues and interested to register, start discussion needs. and debate, and engage with the
BRISTOL PRIDE 2007
committee members. This public feedback will be taken into the committee meetings, allowing every member of the If you are LGB and were once addicted community unprecedented potential for to substances but have been well for input into the event. over two years, and would like to volunteer, please contact Patsy at the We have high hopes that people from all Women’s Alcohol Dependency over Bristol and the south west will pull Project, on 0117 373 8797. You will be together on this – let’s finally give given training and support to carry out Bristol’s LGBT community the fantastic your role. pride event it deserves! Can you help?
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Listings…
107 Wells Road, Totterdown, BS4 2BS. Email: amy.greenslade@ywca.org.uk Broken Rainbow National helpline for LGBT victims of domestic violence, available Mon-Fri 9am-1pm, 2-5pm. Call 0208 539 9507.
BLAGS - Bristol Lesbian & Gay Switchboard Confidential support and information to gay men, lesbians and to all people with concerns about sexuality. Call us on 8-10pm Monday, Wednesday & Thursday. 0117 922 1328. Email: mail@bristolblags.org.uk Web: www.bristolblags.org.uk
EACH - Educational Action Challenging Homophobia A national charitable organisation set up to address homophobia through training and education. EACH runs a helpline for teachers, young people and parents, and for third-party reporting of homophobic incidents. Freephone helpline 0808 1000 143 (10am-5pm Mon-Fri and 10am-12noon Sat). General enquiries 0117 946 7606/7. Office 24, 14 Clifton Down Rd, Bristol BS8 4BF. Email: info@eachaction.org.uk Web: www.eachaction.org.uk
BLiS - Bath Lesbians into Socialising We meet on the 3rd Wednesday of every month at 8:30 in Mandalyns, 1 Fountain Buildings, Lansdown Rd, Bath. Call 07891 563 127 for event details. Email: blisinfo@aol.com
Brigstowe Project Housing project for people living with HIV, providing support, advice and advocacy. 176 Easton Rd, Easton, Bristol. Call 0117 941 5188. Freedom Youth Web: www.brigstowe.org Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual youth organisation. Friendly social and support group for age 13 – Bristol Bisons RFC Bristol's first gay and gay-friendly rugby team is 25, meets Tuesdays from 7–9 pm. always looking for new members, players and Call Babs on 0117 377 3677.
supporters. Everyone welcome regardless of experience or ability. Call 0783 145 4991. Web: Gay Glos Help, advice and social networks for LGBT www.bisonsrfc.co.uk people living in the rural areas of Gloucestershire. PO Box 171, Gloucester. MonBristol Drugs Project Support for users, families and friends. Call LGB Fri 7.30-10pm. Call 01452 306 800. rep Sarah Wilson on 0117 987 6010. 11 Web: www.gay-glos.org Brunswick Square, BS2 8PE. Email: HST@bdp.org.uk
The Harbour Providing free, professional counselling and psychotherapy to people affected by HIV, AIDS Bristol Families and Friends BFF is a support group for families and friends and other life-threatening illnesses. 30 of LGB people. We meet on the third Frogmore St, Bristol. Ffi: 0117 925 9348 or Wednesday of every month at 7pm at the www.the-harbour.co.uk Terrence Higgins Trust. LGB Young People's Forum Call Sue Allen on 01454 852 418. 14 Brockley Close, Little Stoke Bristol BS34 Youth group for age 13 – 19 researching LGB issues. Meets Wednesdays 6:30 – 9pm. Call 6EZ. Email: sueallenfflag@blueyonder.co.uk Babs on 0117 377 3677. Bristol 3Ms Supper group for gay and bisexual men. We Out Loud hold regular social evenings in Bristol and Social group for lesbian and bisexual young Weston-super-Mare. Call Russell on 0117 973 women aged 13 – 19. Meets on Mondays 6:30 – 9pm. Call Babs on 0117 377 3677. 9855. Email: bristol_3ms@hotmail.com Friends on the Hill Group for people in Redfield, Lawrence Hill, Barton Hill and the Dings for people who are LGBT or unsure. Socials, activities, info and support. Call Rowan on 0117 955 6971.
Bristol Young Women’s Centre YWCA We provide one-to-one counselling with a lesbian counsellor, and a lesbian and bisexual women’s support group which runs for 12 sessions once a year. Call 0117 971 6770.
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Gay and Lesbian Alcohol Free Friends Social and support group for lesbian, gay and bisexual people with an alcohol issue. Call Paul Green on 0117 378 9439 GLAFF, PO Box 2012, Bristol, BS99 5WN. Email: TMM@glaff.org.uk
For info about LGBT History Month visit www.bristol-city.gov.uk/lgbthistorymonth
So Out in the South West A new social and support group for disabled gay men living and/or working in the South West. Call Robin on 0117 942 9336 (office) GayWest A social and support group for gay people in the Email: robin.corser-langford@virgin.net South West. Meets Sat mornings in the Rainbow Cafe in Bath. For details and events South West Walking Women call 0870 811 1990, Mon – Fri 8pm – 10pm. For women interested in hiking in the Bath and GayWest, PO Box 586, Bath, BA1 2YQ. Bristol area at weekends. Email: info@gaywest.org.uk Email: sw_walkingwomen@yahoo.co.uk Web: www.gaywest.org.uk Terrence Higgins Trust West Information, care and support, and health Lesbian & Children Network We are a support network for lesbian and promotion for all people affected by HIV and bisexual women and their children. Call Rachel AIDS. Counselling, buddying, complementary Yarrow on 0117 942 6884. therapies, advocacy and advice. Call us on Email: rachely@talktalk.net 0117 955 1000. 8 West Street, Old Market, BS2 0BH. Email: info.bristol@tht.org.uk LGBT Society UWE Weekly meetings, consisting of alternate on University of Bristol LGBT Society scene and off scene events, plus trips. Call Cari We organise regular social events for all LGBT on 07812 670 648 or Sean on 07904 382 719. students at Bristol University. LGBT Society, UWE Student Union Frenchay Campus, University of Bristol Union, Queens Road, Coldharbour Lane, Bristol. BS16 1QY. Clifton, Bristol BS8 1LN. Email: lgbtsoc-ubu@bristol.ac.uk Web: www.bristol.ac.uk/union/lgbt Missing Lesbians Website listing events for women in Bristol and the surrounding areas. USPCG Email: listings@missinglesbians.co.uk A UK-based organisation that finds pen pals for Web: www.missinglesbians.co.uk gay US prisoners. PO Box 1714, Yate. BS37 4NS. Web: www.uspcg.com Pink Herrings Social network for lesbians, meets every other Victim Support Avonvale Thursday evening at 8:30. Also bowling, We provide emotional and practical support to cinema, coffee bars, theatre, concerts, discos, all people affected by crime, including cycling, walks, meals out and more. For further homophobic hate crime. Call 0117 963 1114, info call Dot on 0117 986 1529. national helpline 0845 30 30 900. 36 Dean Lane, Bedminster, BS3 1BS. Email: bristol@victimsupportavonvale.org.uk Pink Parents UK Information, advice and support on all aspects Web: www.victimsupportavonvale.org.uk of lesbian, gay and bisexual parenting. Write to Pink Parents UK, The D'Arcy Lainey Wild Walking Women Foundation, PO BOX 417, Oldham. OL2 7WT. A friendly walking group for lesbians, meets the Email: enquiries@pinkparents.org.uk second Sunday of the month with walks at various venues around Bristol, Bath and the south west. Call 07980 418 676. Rainbow Group Bristol City Council employees group for campaigning, support and socialising. Call Equalities on 0117 922 3786 or email rainbow@bristol-city.gov.uk
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Membership of the Forum The Bristol LGB Forum works by getting lesbian, gay and bisexual people together. The more we all shout at the same time the more we are heard! Joining the Forum is a way of getting your voice heard locally and keeping up to date with what is going on in the community.
Membership of the Forum is free and confidential – just fill in this form and post it back to us. Individual and organisation membership is available to lesbian, gay and bisexual people and organisations. Non-LGB organisations who work with or have an interest in lesbian, gay and bisexual people and communities are very welcome to join as associates.
Name
Are you an LGB member?
Address
Yes
No
Would you like to become a member? Yes
No
Em@il Where did you get this mag? Telephone Gender: Female
Were you interested in volunteering?
Male
Sexual Orientation: Lesbian
Gay Bisexual
Do you identify as disabled? Yes
No
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